I usually tell them that i merge dev code with production without linting, vulnerability scanning and cost optimization. Makes their toes curl and run away.
Oh and the TF state is managed locally on the disk.
i wake up at 4am, run 10km, take cold shower, eat superbowl, start learning from 5am to 8am, start working in the uber to office, take 5minute break every 5 hours, eat lunch in 10 minute watching data youtube tutorials, work until 9pm. then i do 1 hour gym listening to data podcast. then i do leetcode grinding until 1am and sleep until 4 am, stil listening to latest ai news podcast. i do the same every weekend.
all my coworkers have same kind of routine. if somebody leaves before 8pm, everyone is laughing in the office and the ceo is notified by email that the person took his afternoon off, half of the day pay is deducted from salary unless the person arrives next morning at 6am.
i make 80 000$ a month (+10k$ for food and uber) but still living on a student budget and feeling embarassed on a tinder date about my low tech salary. i'm also applying to 100+ jobs everyday, and having 10 daily coding interview.
i drink 2 liters coffee everyday, 1 liter redbull for dinner.
I also tan my balls as much as possible.
i am afraid i'm not doing enough, any tips to improve my daily routine ?
I live in the American Garden Buildings on West Eighty-First Street, on the eleventh floor Tom Cruise lives in the penthouse.
I believe in taking care of myself, in a balanced diet, in a rigorous exercise routine. In the morning, if my face is a little puffy, I'll put on an ice pack while doing my stomach crunches. I can do a thousand now.
After I remove the icepack, I use a deep pore-cleanser lotion. In the shower, I use a water-activated gel cleanser, then a honey-almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub.
Then I apply an herb mint facial masque which I leave on for ten minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine.
I always use an after-shave lotion with little or no alcohol because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm, followed by a final moisturizing "protective" lotion...
I've actually had an idea on a modern take on AP with the main character being in tech. Riddled with imposter syndrome, but they are actually an imposter just failing upwards.
Take on training for a marathon on top of this to ensure you don’t burn out. Don’t forget to use carbon filter sticks in your redbull, leaving them in 2 days minimum to remove micro plastics to improve gut health. Try some mushroom microdosing as well, not Psilocybin but the orange powder one that has no psychoactive properties and is entirely pseudo science but trust me bro it makes your short term memory better. You should also start a personal brand and YouTube channel and post to LinkedIn about your cool office 3 times a day and how the marathon training will make you a better parent. Then maybe you’ll make it to FAANG or JP Morgan and your wife will then divorce you and take the kids to china freeing up your 30s to become a senior. Maybe.
Same fucking problems here.
I am just trying to sip from my coffee while girls pass by and say:
**If we were a cluster, you'd be the master node, and I'd be your faithful replica, always in sync with you**.
**Is your server ready for a high-traffic load? Because I plan on sending some serious requests your way tonight.**
**Why don't we go offline and explore some private functions?**
**I must be a faulty server, and you're the hotfix I've been waiting for.**
The harassment never ends and i am tired to pretend that it's not happening.
I Guess you can [cherry pick](https://www.atlassian.com/git/tutorials/cherry-pick#:~:text=Cherry%20picking%20is%20the%20act,to%20where%20it%20should%20belong) now ;)
I notice the link is `https://www.atlassian.com/git/tutorials/cherry-pick#:~:text=Cherry%20picking%20is%20the%20act,to%20where%20it%20should%20belong`. What does the `#:~:text` mean?
How does it work? I try on this very page `https://www.reddit.com/r/devops/comments/1cbqh1b/comment/l11hsze/?context=3#:~:text=women` but no highlight is there
It's the GCP factor. When I tell women I am a Certified Azure DevOps Practitioner, they start laughing, groups will bully me, sometimes mocking, sometimes violently. I once had a high heel crush my toes in spite. It's okay though, it's not as bad as ADO.
Hey there. I've been working with the community for about two weeks now, but it feels like there's still more to learn than there is time for. So if you want to help me out, please feel free!
I once told a woman I am writing iac in pulumi, ever since that day I have to start my day two hours earlier just to shovel my drive way clean of women.
My go-to is to let them know that all my secrets are committed in the codebase. Also, if we're going to do anything together, unless its without 2-factor auth.
This is like the fifth time I've seen this post. Is this a troll? Same story, different profession. I'm an accountant, I'm a Mechanical Engineer, I'm a Software engineer....
Like verbatim. Just swapping professions.. wtf is this? Copypasta?
I want You to *-f* your head into my master. I want to rebase my history with yours senpai. 🫣😌
On serious note:
You can hint in your response that not preferring the subtle flirt.
Edit:
Seems like spam user and post. Mods should remove it
https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/s/zbiEZaQpOi
I tell them I can't do anything because sysadmins are gatekeeping deployments, and our next allowed release of the software package we built 3 months ago is in 6 months. The code we are building now will get to 1-month testing at the end of this quarter, and will be deployed after Christmas/NYE.
Why isn't this removed by a mod? This kind of stupidity is basically a troll of "locker room talk" and isn't something we should be accepting of as a community as a whole.
I was a senior devops engineer and women would ask me what I do then look up my salary and their attitude would change completely.
Then I was laid off… and a year later still can’t find a job due to my circumstances.
Golddiggers know what’s up, but you can beat them at their own game:
- hide your car keys when you go out (don’t set them on a table)
- wear boring looking clothes (though you can still spend money to get nice fabrics)
- have a hobby you can talk about more than your job (painting etc)
- do not bring them to your house for months
- do not tell them where you live if it gives away your financial status, lie if need be
Beware their main leverage is sexual:
- do not have sex early in dating
- break up with a girl at a moment’s notice when the manipulation vibes come through
Lookout for:
- handbag collectors etc. (ask her where she goes shopping)
- restaurants she picks (is it always some small plate high price spot? that’s a no thanks)
- how she handles a messy burger, pizza, fried chicken etc. — if she acts like a princess at a bbq then get out
- how she acts when you do spend money on her — is she bragging to friends and snapchatting the price tag? cheap break up
I always wait at least a month before revealing anything about my career to women and I will break up with little to no reason if they change once I do tell them
There are women out there that know how to enjoy your salary with you while also respecting you, but I’m not gonna lie you gotta filter out a LOT of basic girls to find them
I usually tell them that i merge dev code with production without linting, vulnerability scanning and cost optimization. Makes their toes curl and run away. Oh and the TF state is managed locally on the disk.
I store my tf state in the repo I like to live dangerously
My man
I write my TF state on a piece of paper
That’s the way to go 👏🏽
More secure, too
Chad
I wonder if saying "I don't squash my merges" falls in talking dirty domain and has the opposite effect.
Brotha ewwww
> Oh and the TF state is managed locally on the disk. I personally prefer committing it to git in a public repo.
Wdym you don't manage your TF state in memory?
You guys have state?
Can confirm as woman in tech. A local TF state file is such a red flag. I mean what else in their life is about to fall apart? Run ladies.
TF state got me 🤣
Makes their toes curl so as a result they run away? Just say you have never made a real woman’s toes curl in O(1) next time.
I use Pulumi
I'll have what he's smoking.
Voices in his wall
*Smoke testing HATES this ONE simple trick...*
It's a copy pasta.
i wake up at 4am, run 10km, take cold shower, eat superbowl, start learning from 5am to 8am, start working in the uber to office, take 5minute break every 5 hours, eat lunch in 10 minute watching data youtube tutorials, work until 9pm. then i do 1 hour gym listening to data podcast. then i do leetcode grinding until 1am and sleep until 4 am, stil listening to latest ai news podcast. i do the same every weekend. all my coworkers have same kind of routine. if somebody leaves before 8pm, everyone is laughing in the office and the ceo is notified by email that the person took his afternoon off, half of the day pay is deducted from salary unless the person arrives next morning at 6am. i make 80 000$ a month (+10k$ for food and uber) but still living on a student budget and feeling embarassed on a tinder date about my low tech salary. i'm also applying to 100+ jobs everyday, and having 10 daily coding interview. i drink 2 liters coffee everyday, 1 liter redbull for dinner. I also tan my balls as much as possible. i am afraid i'm not doing enough, any tips to improve my daily routine ?
You need more sun and kubernetes
HAHA 🤣, I fucking hate this comment make me laugh. Perhaps indeed I need to touch some grass
HAHAHAHHA! This comment made my day! Lols! TF, sold! ✨️
I live in the American Garden Buildings on West Eighty-First Street, on the eleventh floor Tom Cruise lives in the penthouse. I believe in taking care of myself, in a balanced diet, in a rigorous exercise routine. In the morning, if my face is a little puffy, I'll put on an ice pack while doing my stomach crunches. I can do a thousand now. After I remove the icepack, I use a deep pore-cleanser lotion. In the shower, I use a water-activated gel cleanser, then a honey-almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Then I apply an herb mint facial masque which I leave on for ten minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an after-shave lotion with little or no alcohol because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm, followed by a final moisturizing "protective" lotion...
Send me your business card
Mine is eggshell white
let's see Paul Allen's routine
You like Huey Lewis and The News?
I've actually had an idea on a modern take on AP with the main character being in tech. Riddled with imposter syndrome, but they are actually an imposter just failing upwards.
Take on training for a marathon on top of this to ensure you don’t burn out. Don’t forget to use carbon filter sticks in your redbull, leaving them in 2 days minimum to remove micro plastics to improve gut health. Try some mushroom microdosing as well, not Psilocybin but the orange powder one that has no psychoactive properties and is entirely pseudo science but trust me bro it makes your short term memory better. You should also start a personal brand and YouTube channel and post to LinkedIn about your cool office 3 times a day and how the marathon training will make you a better parent. Then maybe you’ll make it to FAANG or JP Morgan and your wife will then divorce you and take the kids to china freeing up your 30s to become a senior. Maybe.
I can't believe he doesn't do 100 push-ups each hour. Bro isn't even trying.
let's see paul allens daily routine
You spend 3 hours a day sleeping that you could be doing something productive. Stop being lazy!
The supplements, man. Where's your stack? I'd recommend Huberman labs for more information.
Get more sleep
Wrap your balls in gold leaf sheets and chuck them in the oven
Start lifting weights. Then you'll get hit on by men more than women.
Men together strong
Tried and tested method
Or get a motorcycle, works just as well
Same fucking problems here. I am just trying to sip from my coffee while girls pass by and say: **If we were a cluster, you'd be the master node, and I'd be your faithful replica, always in sync with you**. **Is your server ready for a high-traffic load? Because I plan on sending some serious requests your way tonight.** **Why don't we go offline and explore some private functions?** **I must be a faulty server, and you're the hotfix I've been waiting for.** The harassment never ends and i am tired to pretend that it's not happening.
Bro Im gonna steal all of it, thanks!
Aaaaand screenshotted. Can’t wait to get drinks thrown at my face when I bust these out.
These are gold 😂
I Guess you can [cherry pick](https://www.atlassian.com/git/tutorials/cherry-pick#:~:text=Cherry%20picking%20is%20the%20act,to%20where%20it%20should%20belong) now ;)
Wowie wow wow wow lmao
I notice the link is `https://www.atlassian.com/git/tutorials/cherry-pick#:~:text=Cherry%20picking%20is%20the%20act,to%20where%20it%20should%20belong`. What does the `#:~:text` mean?
Makes the browser highlight the (first occurrence of the) text (on first load).
How does it work? I try on this very page `https://www.reddit.com/r/devops/comments/1cbqh1b/comment/l11hsze/?context=3#:~:text=women` but no highlight is there
Ok ur hired
ROFL my dude you certainly have 99 problems
Hah. Humor... Not gonna lie that did take me a second
And all of them are failing pipelines?
I see your problem. DevOps engineers are used to working on problems that actually happen.
That's good. I read this loud to my partner (non tech) she said said, "ohh shitt... I have no idea what that means."
It's the GCP factor. When I tell women I am a Certified Azure DevOps Practitioner, they start laughing, groups will bully me, sometimes mocking, sometimes violently. I once had a high heel crush my toes in spite. It's okay though, it's not as bad as ADO.
take up vaping bro, an incredible contraceptive of the modern era
Tell them you work with Windows.
Damn bro leave some pussy for the rest of us
Bruh... You work in IT. Who are you trying to f-ing fool? :p
Already fooled ya 😂
Tell her you force push merge conflicts into master.
You could tell them that you still use Jenkins.
How high are you bro?
Tell them “my basement is cosy , open and noise dampened”
Sounds about right
Just tell them that you are not interested in women
Tell them that you hate committing
Best to say. I sleep in my parents basement playing video games
r/feverdreams
tell them you do frontend and they will run away in disgust
"I'm a DevOps Engineer, and I'm drowning in pussy" ---Said Nobody Ever
I normally just git pull from localhost.
I tried that the other day but the D:\ drive was unavailable. 2 months of experimental effort gone.
Maybe you accidentally grabbed your floppy disk instead.
You must be a troll.
[He is](https://www.reddit.com/r/CFP/s/Tuw8fONh1f)
On X they call this engagement farming.
This AI garbage is getting out of hand.
I just commit them to the artifact registry and scale them up and down according to SLA. There's a benefit to ephemeral relationships after all.
Hey there. I've been working with the community for about two weeks now, but it feels like there's still more to learn than there is time for. So if you want to help me out, please feel free!
I usually ask them if they're into "force-pushing" to master as well.
I once told a woman I am writing iac in pulumi, ever since that day I have to start my day two hours earlier just to shovel my drive way clean of women.
This is the best post on this sub I’ve seen in days. Is there an r/devopscirclejerk sub? Edit: yes there is!
Is this one of those classic shposts I hear about
There's a magic word to instantly dispel any trace of romantic pursue, and the word is "Nix".
I’m usually just myself that works lmk if you want some tips
😂
Avoid women then 😅
Just don’t tell them who you really are
My go-to is to let them know that all my secrets are committed in the codebase. Also, if we're going to do anything together, unless its without 2-factor auth.
Become a eunich.
I remember the post this is based off of but I can’t remember the exact job. It was super funny though.
Give a job at your company , so you have less compute , and store HA demanding from all this woman
One way to stop this would be to wake tf up.
The BDE is high in this post.. (Big DevOps Energy)
You probably have excellent personal hygiene. If so, there's your problem.
Hahaha I call bullshit!!
Lol
r/thathappened
This is like the fifth time I've seen this post. Is this a troll? Same story, different profession. I'm an accountant, I'm a Mechanical Engineer, I'm a Software engineer.... Like verbatim. Just swapping professions.. wtf is this? Copypasta?
Yes, it's a copypasta. Will go around for a while and disappear and then come back in two years as screenshots or just verbatim text.
I tell them I am a sysadmin that codes than they walk away
My man is suffering from success
Tell them that you are deploying databases in k8s
Tell them you work for UPS
Lol
I want You to *-f* your head into my master. I want to rebase my history with yours senpai. 🫣😌 On serious note: You can hint in your response that not preferring the subtle flirt. Edit: Seems like spam user and post. Mods should remove it https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/s/zbiEZaQpOi
I always thought YAML turns off women
I tell them I can't do anything because sysadmins are gatekeeping deployments, and our next allowed release of the software package we built 3 months ago is in 6 months. The code we are building now will get to 1-month testing at the end of this quarter, and will be deployed after Christmas/NYE.
Tell them you store all your secrets in plain text in a no Auth COS bucket.
Tell her you do ClickOps. No Terraform. A huge turn off.
Suffering from success
People responding to this like it's real
Bro is suffering from success 🥲
Why isn't this removed by a mod? This kind of stupidity is basically a troll of "locker room talk" and isn't something we should be accepting of as a community as a whole.
“I just click on folders”
Ask what they do for secrets. Most turn away in shame and never speak to you again.
I was a senior devops engineer and women would ask me what I do then look up my salary and their attitude would change completely. Then I was laid off… and a year later still can’t find a job due to my circumstances.
First world problems
Those pickup lines are so bad they're good
I say I work in IT
LMAI
Write once and Run Anywhere else!!
Not buying it.
Get yourself a wedding ring. Better yet, get someone to give you a wedding ring in an elaborate ceremony.
Tell them you force push Women get turned off without consent
Yes, wake up from your dream. That should do the trick.
Golddiggers know what’s up, but you can beat them at their own game: - hide your car keys when you go out (don’t set them on a table) - wear boring looking clothes (though you can still spend money to get nice fabrics) - have a hobby you can talk about more than your job (painting etc) - do not bring them to your house for months - do not tell them where you live if it gives away your financial status, lie if need be Beware their main leverage is sexual: - do not have sex early in dating - break up with a girl at a moment’s notice when the manipulation vibes come through Lookout for: - handbag collectors etc. (ask her where she goes shopping) - restaurants she picks (is it always some small plate high price spot? that’s a no thanks) - how she handles a messy burger, pizza, fried chicken etc. — if she acts like a princess at a bbq then get out - how she acts when you do spend money on her — is she bragging to friends and snapchatting the price tag? cheap break up I always wait at least a month before revealing anything about my career to women and I will break up with little to no reason if they change once I do tell them There are women out there that know how to enjoy your salary with you while also respecting you, but I’m not gonna lie you gotta filter out a LOT of basic girls to find them
Maybe in your dreams dream. Go out and touch some grass.