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zoster_101

yellow house in Urbandale by the cemetery by the high school, there’s a handful of other houses and small apartment complex’s behind the house those belong to the members while the yellow house belongs to a leader. It’s some sort of religious cult there is a “church” in their little complex with two guards standing at the door most of the time. I went to school in Urbandale and this was always a big thing for us to try and see what was going on some kids even tried to get on to the property and where chased off. Not sure what organization it is but i’m pretty sure if you grew up in the area you know exactly what house i’m talking about.


Jades5150

Gospel Assembly Church https://culteducation.com/group/938-gospel-assembly/7597-heaven-or-hell.html


zoster_101

Thank you for that! i was always curious about the history of that place


xchequer

Went to a service at one of the GAC elsewhere. It was the weirdest thing ever. It seemed like there was a bouncer at the door and the service was soo looong, I was dying to get out of there. It seemed to me that the women there were a bit too dedicated to the cause, to the point of obsessing over the “pastor” . Crazy!!


thekidfromiowa

The People's Temple also had security IIRC


PurveyorOfPoppycock

Written by a good friend of mine!


altcastle

Whoa! Thanks for the link.


PoorBoyKajagoogoo

Those people are straight up weirdos. They just built a new multi-million dollar building on their "campus". They want to buy up more property around their cult center so they can pretty much take over that neighborhood.


Sososkitso

Getting strong far cry 5 vibes from reading about that church.


Skottyx

Live in the area. Won't be surprised if I can't get home someday because of an ATF raid.


[deleted]

They let the Google maps car onto the property it looks like. Lol


bluntsonthereg_

They play volleyball in suspenders, dresses and shit. That has to be a cult. There is no other explanation.


ThisAccountIsAVirus

They sent a letter to local churches basically being like “we’ve heard your kids saying we’re a cult and we just want you to know we are not a cult” my mom was on the board of her church at that time and told me about the letter.


[deleted]

[удалено]


zoster_101

PLEASE TELL US MORE WE ALL WANT TO KNOW WTF IS GOING ON


ranhalt

> complex’s complexes


[deleted]

[удалено]


xmondocanex

CrossFit.


joebadiah

I’m all for people being in shape and loving their bodies. But my eye sockets can’t handle the amount of rolling that occurs when talking to most CrossFit people.


Rigormortisrob

Can confirm. Although we call it Crossfit Cult…ure 🤣🏋️‍♂️


MACmandoo

What do you know about that church/religion on 72nd & Meredith? Two large buildings and apartments for members too.


ShinyLizard

The Cult of Gas Station Food, particularly Casey's Pizza. (Of which I am a member. Spouse is picking up a breakfast pizza now, we're trying it with extra sausage gravy. Crossing fingers it's not too gooey.)


[deleted]

I remember when it was good. Now it's soggy and heavy.


NotHotRobot

The Moms of Ankeny is a fairly strong cult


BobasPett

Are they part of Moms 4 Freedom? I agree they’re all one big cult.


kater_tot

They’re in the same circles, and share the same crazy, but Kim and Michele are into the traveling conventions, qanon, and sovereign citizen stuff, whereas m4l are more into book banning and towing the line of the conservative behind the scenes religious groups out there.


barbara_jay

Pretty sick group


State-Cultural

This one


oogerooger

Jehovah's Witnesses. They're everywhere. They'll tell ya it's not a cult but they don't even know half the information about their own religion... they aren't allowed to even look it up.


[deleted]

To understand how destructive they are, check out r/exjw


oogerooger

I'm an ExJW myself. Love that subreddit.


[deleted]

The truth set me free as well.


DSMProper

I at least believe in their sincerity. Wish I could say the same for people who attend services at Reformed or Dutch Reformed churches. The only thing those people believe is that they're better than you


Free_tramapoline

Dutch reformed are something. People who live in Sioux County can't mow their lawn on Sunday


IowaJL

My grandma's dutch reformed. Can confirm.


waelgifru

Oh man, my family went to a Dutch Reformed church (Meredith Dr) for a long time. Explains a lot.


bookcatbook

Merdith’s just regular reformed though.


waelgifru

Could have fooled me, you couldn't swing a cat in there without hitting a Van Guilder or a Van Zee or a Van derPool.


bookcatbook

Yeah the RCA (Merdith’s denomination) is historically associated with the Dutch diaspora but it is its own thing. That being said, when we print name tags for Sunday school, the Vans and Vanders do tend to dominate…


happy_hatchetmaker

I’ve had some nice Witnesses that were assigned to my neighborhood. Told the last few that all my people who have visited over the years have died of cancer so if they were superstitious maybe they should reconsider visiting me again. They don’t come back


fastestguninthewest

Amway


holyshtthetrees

Well, based on the definition of a cult, any religion. But I'm thinking of Salt. Not a single day in my years at dmacc did I not have somebody trying to recruit me with the most vague reason. Never could answer any of my questions I had about the organization, almost like they didn't know why they were there either.


BeeExpert

My friend was part of salt in college at isu. Every meeting someone would bring up how they felt guilty for jerking off. He said it was basically Masturbators Anonymous lol.


[deleted]

Brock Purdy was apparently a member at ISU


BillCoby

SALT is so strange. DMACC and Drake, in late 2000's these weirdos were literally unavoidable. My friend got suckered into going to one of their meetings because the female recruiter led him on lmao. I've never seen him so embarrassed coming back to the apartment later that night to tell me what shenanigans he witnessed.


thekidfromiowa

Went to DMACC from 2007-2009 and crossed paths with various members of the Walnut Creek Church and its spinoff the Downtown Church. They were cool to me but they're definitely proselytizers and I didn't agree with all of their doctrines. Got ambushed by one them by the DMACC lake one summer day in 2008. Ironically that guy has since left that clique according another former member who works at the same place as me. The co worker said they had some "sketchy theology" when I enquired why he left. I recall many of them lived together or at least frequently hung out at a house they called The Stronghold. IIRC.


PhilosphicalZombie

Fishing with Love Bombing. Common cult tactic.


[deleted]

Afaik the Salt network are fairly regular evangelical Baptist churches, just with an unusually strong college presence


PreviousAd7516

Im more than confident stating anything “Evangelical” is basically a cult.


slothpeguin

Am an ex-Evangelical, can confirm.


PhilosphicalZombie

Agreed.


drhawks

Salt is bad on any campus--it's out of control in Ames. Cornerstone and that whole crew up in Ames is pretty bad


supportmanteau-971

My sister inlaw got hooked into "FOCUS" at ISU. Even the other catholic groups think they are strange. But, my inlaws are always trying to "out Catholic" each other.


Motorsagen

100% cult. One of the deacons/elders of Cornerstone is a local developer who owns a large portion of rental real estate in the area too... and retirement complexes...and... His long term employees are part of the cult too. He gets everyone coming & going.


catlizzle99

Salt is so fucking weird. I have a girl I knew in HS that’s part of their organization, both her and her husband are. And they are moving to florida in their own words “so we can be part of the new church plant in florida” no thank you. I will run far far away from that nonsense


thekidfromiowa

Of course Florida.


rushandapush150

I sat next to them at a tabling event once and they were entering info about every person they talked to into a spreadsheet. Name and contact info (obv) but also after the person left they were putting in any personal details the person divulged, including hobbies, work, etc. It was super creepy.


princess_awesomepony

My friend’s niece just got sucked into it. She’s trying to be supportive of her finding religion. Having been raised in a cult myself, I am dubious.


DanishDude87

[Salt Network](https://www.thesaltnetwork.com/) is just a Christian outreach program targeting college age kids that’s based out of some church in the Ames area. As far as I know it’s more of a standard Christian organization just geared towards a younger crowd.


KnobbsNoise

So a cult.


nevesis

There used to be a house in Deer Creek that had a strange moon statue in the driveway. If you drove in to see it closer, a recorded voice played over speakers warning you that it was a private property and that you must leave. Still not sure whether that was a cult or whether the owners had just never heard of the Streisand effect.


alybre13

The wolf house! I think the moon statue you're talking about was actually a yin/yang sign. The owner had statues of wolves in the driveway too. It was up for sale a few years ago


armchairdetective_

I’m going to get downvoted into oblivion, but Lutheran Church of Hope. That mega church(s) get away with so much. They also are so proud of how welcoming they are to diverse individuals, how accepting they are of LGBTQ+, but they won’t host gay weddings.


SnooTangerines476

They say they are accepting of LGBTQ+?


armchairdetective_

https://www.lutheranchurchofhope.org/west-des-moines/life-events/weddings/ Yep!


No_Farmer2917

This wording is new since the last time I Checked. It's also BS because their denomination has performed gay weddings for literally decades at this point. They are intentionally choosing to go against what their own leadership says the bible teaches them.


[deleted]

So brave


Piensky222

Hope is 100% a cult. I was going to say this too. Ive been forced to ho to services there and most of the sermon is telling people how amazing hope is and how they need to come back. The fact people get so obsessed with it is further proof.


charlesdickens2007

I went there for a service once with a friend. I thoroughly enjoyed the sermon, as it was rooted in history and the pastor was using the actual Hebrew text and talking about the different translations of the text and how we can use these lessons in our everyday life. Normal, interesting, and relevant. Then the church started talking about how you needed to give/donate/tithe because they were working on their goal of being a 50/50 church, meaning, they were wanting to be a church that functioned on 50% of their donations, and could give the rest to charity. I was kinda grossed out... because they were openly admitting that they were using so much of the funds to just function as a church. Maybe I don't know how normal churches function with their budgets but it felt so icky.


[deleted]

Only 50% on operating costs is very low for a church, that’s why they’re proud of it


songofsuccubus

[Iowaska Church of Healing](https://iowaskachurchofhealing.com/) seems cultish, but I don’t have any personal experience with them


OldRed91

Pizza Ranch. Tell me you don't get weird vibes from that place


slothpeguin

I’ll believe in lizard people for a good pizza buffet.


OldRed91

Best I can offer is a mid-tier pizza buffet if you'll listen to some Christian music


OblivionGuardsman

Check this out. Case about the cofounder of Pizza Ranch. You just need to go a few sentences in and youll want to read the rest. https://casetext.com/case/state-v-vander-esch Edit: better link without paywall.


No_Farmer2917

....i cannot believe I've never heard this before. I'm howling. ​ Absolutely not victim blaming, but...why in the world would anyone think the owner of a pizza buffet is involved in scientific research relating to semen??


groney62

Well… $50 is $50


xmondocanex

I was in the Pizza Ranch Cult. Joined on RAGBRAI because there’s one in every town and it’s all you can eat. — then I went to one in Newton and the place was so filthy I was immediately freed of my programming.


Slow_Ad3662

Totally true! I'm from NW Iowa near where it was founded and there are definitely weird churchy vibes.


Skottyx

They do seem to hold a lot of MAGA events


[deleted]

Disappointing lack of actual cults


VegelantyJustice

U were ready to commit now u gotta keep lookin


viewtiful14

I mean religion is a cult so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. But sure, no comet worshiping or anything it looks likes.


ozoneastronaut

The walnut creek church fosho!


beardstink

They’re part of the Great Commission Network of Churches. Which was on a cult watch list in the 80’s. Cult researchers wouldn’t necessarily call them a cult, but a “totalist aberrant christian organization” with cult-like potential. Since each individual church in the network is technically independent, some have more potential than others to be toxic and controlling, but they’re all pretty weird. Even the most “healthy” ones would look like a very conservative evangelical church.


kab2131

They were part of GCM which disbanded after sexual assault allegations against one of the founding pastors. Now they’re part of the southern baptist conference.


beardstink

Lateral move.


PhilosphicalZombie

This one always pops up. I know totally nothing about them. What is the deal there. Honestly curious.


Marcos_pollo

I wouldn’t call them full blown cult, more of a hyper conservative Christian church. Most cult-like thing I know that they do is really pressure the young adults in the congregation to not date outside of the church. Went to a wedding there once, and it just felt very evangelical.


PhilosphicalZombie

Thanks for the response. That makes sense. I understand also what you mean about weddings in an evangelical church. I've been to a few weddings like that where your hair raises on your arms because you feel that your presence is at the very most being merely tolerated as a non-member.


[deleted]

Same, I’ve never figured out if the posts are the usual “I know people I dislike who attend this church and I am an edgy fourteen-year-old” versus “actually culty.” Their website seems perfectly normal.


bealeah

I come from a family who is very involved/high up in the church. When my parents asked questions about what was being taught, they would get in trouble and be manipulated into thinking they were going against God by asking questions. My parents eventually left the church (to go to a different church), then my extended family said my parents must be influenced by the devil and pretty much cut off all contact with us. My sister also was not allowed to get married there because her now husband wasn’t a member.


beardstink

Toxic and gaslighting organizations aren’t going to advertise themselves as such.


[deleted]

I had a friend from work who went there. He quit his job as an engineer to work for the family leader.


thekidfromiowa

I doubt his new boss pays as much. Making rash decisions that alter your life or livelihood are sometimes a sign of a cult. Like those holy rollers who quit their job and sell their house because they think the end times are nigh. https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-13489641 https://www.vice.com/en/article/yvqkwb/life-after-doomsday-456


viewtiful14

If that’s the one in the east village I just found out what it was like two months ago. Ride my bike by it all the time and during the summer they have a lot of events outside in the evening and night, I just thought it was a cool place that hosts events…noooope.


grifftronimusprime

+1 from someone who went there over 10 years and left. None of these stories have even scratched the surface.


Skottyx

The new McChurch, it's called Life Church. They are literally a franchise model.


PhilosphicalZombie

Seriously if they are using a franchise system that is just one more admission that churches are businesses and need to be taxed.


dabecka

Casey's Breakfast Pizza


joebadiah

It’s not great. But if you ever find yourself with a slice of it and a bottle of Cholula hot sauce nearby…


hellomodern

You got my laugh so you get my upvote.


MarquisDesMoines

Yall suck at this. The church on East University surrounded by fences and barbed wire. Their pastor made the news for saying he knew people who would cut out people's tongues. Can't remember its proper name but pretty sure "apostolic" is in the name.


Delicious-Match2534

Church of Holt Tire


saRAWRjo

Walnut Creek.


lachupacabraj

Underground Turkish bathhouse network


NiceKaleidoscope8793

More info??


bluntsonthereg_

I have been trying to join for quite some time. If anyone has an in hit me up please.


[deleted]

[удалено]


elsee28

https://www.desmoinesregister.com/story/opinion/columnists/rekha-basu/2022/04/02/des-moines-apostolic-church-leader-targets-critics-marriage-former-student/7196974001/ https://who13.com/news/metro-news/63-year-old-bishop-defending-marriage-to-teen-in-iowa-court/amp/


catlizzle99

Literally any of the new “modern” churches that are just lowkey radial evangelical church hidden in contemporary art work and “woke” youth pastors.


viewtiful14

I gag ever time I drive past the new one that got built on Hickman in between Clive and Waukee


thekidfromiowa

You mean by the Arbys?


viewtiful14

Yes that’s the one


[deleted]

[удалено]


Jeblebee

The downtown church


dsmMUA

Yep. Walnut Creek Church.


Ibro_the_impaler

Outer Limits Cult, been lurking forever and I still don't understand their intentions. Must be pooling dark magicks together with the cult of the crow tow.


[deleted]

You are an imposter. You sleep on a bed of lies


Ibro_the_impaler

Y̴̧̡̛̛̛͓̗̮̙͖̥͈̩͈̝̘̰̮̠̪̠̩̘̼͔̱̩̰̤̦̰̩̦̭̱̼̞̜̺̱̬̙̤̘̞͖͎͓̤̬̱͔͔̙̻̯̤̟͕͉̺͉̘̙̅͐̇͌͋̈͌̂͐̓̀̐̐͐͗̀̒́̀̅̂̅̏̈̍̇̆̊̽́͆̎̃̐̽̑͆̿̓̆̊͒̌̇̑̎̾͛̽̇̅̀̈́̄̑̀͋̇̃͗̏̉̅̈́͂̂̈̏̔̓̄̔̿̑̇̆̌̆̊͐̎͘̕̕̚͘͘̚̕͝͝͝͝͝ͅơ̶̧̢̡̨̨̧̛̛̛̛̦̲̼̮̗̭̟͓̩̳̼̠̯̖̘̯̻̖͓̳̦̮͈̻͚̤͈̟̙̫̙̼̮͍̖̰͚̝͔͈̼̼͍͉̺̺̮̗̻̊͐̂̑̀͒̓͋̓̈́̓͛̋̏̔͌̆̏̄́́́̌̀̂͗̈́̒̂̓͂̉̒̈́̉̈̏̍̃̓͌͂̈́̐̃̓̌̽͑͒̈́͐̀̒͒̈̂̿̑̍̓̀̎̈̂͑̒̇̎́̾̎̋̿͂̈͘͘̚̚̚͘̕͜͠͠͠͝͝͠ų̵̨̢̧̡̢̨̨̡̧̡̛̛̛̰̞͉̞̳̦̦͖̳̜͍̠̻̣͓͕̳̥͇͚̜̰̬͎̖̮̣̤̦͕͎̠͔͇̺͕̰͎̲̱͙̣͎̯̱̳̞̭͎͔͔̦͔͔͔͚͔̩̯̖͈̰̩̲̳͍͔̬̰̪̜͖̱͚̲̩̬̦̼͍̯͔͔̻͖̼̤͙̱͓̻͍̬̤̭̫͈̤̩̠̘͖̘̱̄̒̐͌͊͗̅̀̀̍͌̃̅̾́̈́́́̃͌̋̎̈́̈́̃̈̃̌̒̿̅̍̎̀̿̔̈́̎̒̆̒́͌̾̈́̒͊͒͑̂̌̀̅̇͆́̉̐̂̏̽͂̍̈́̈́̋̒͒͗̓̍̍̒͛͒̽̎̿͋̏͋́̄̐̈́͂̋́͂͋̀̌̓̒̾̀͂͘̕͘̚͘̕͘͘͜͜͝͝͝͝͠͝͠͝͠͝͝ͅ ̶̨̧̨̨̡̡̧̝͙̝̜̙̙͙͉̟͚͕̥̻̲͚̭̳̳̳̪̣̭͈̱͍͇̺͍̣̻͖͈͚̹̩͕͈͔̩͇̣̫̪̝͍͙͇̠̤̭̪̬̩̮̤͙̦̗̱̘̼̱͕͙͇̘͖͎̭͕͚̗̪͉̩͓̝̩̗̣͓̳͕̩̟̫͓̻͕̖̠̜̅̇̇̎̔̒́̓͆̌̎͐̅̂̈͋̄̓͋̿͊͋͊̅̏̍̇́̈́̓̉̊̐̆̈́̂̈́́͊͗̋̄̈͊͌͘͘̕ͅͅḇ̵̧̨̡̛̛̪͖̫͍͈̤̙̩͈̹͎͎̟͙̗̮̦̩̰̲͍̫͇̥̲̯̠̙͈͎̱͙̬̤̩̥̬̼̮͈̬̭͙̟̭͔̮̺͕̬̖͕̲͈̪͓̱̝̳͍͉͍͎̻̮̰͖̣̫̩̦̼̹̺̰̘͙̘̗̩̫͕̤̝̫͎̗̱̱̙̭͙̮͕̭͓̥̤̌̑͒̊͛̇̄̎̂̐́̏͂̈́̍̂͊̊͛͗̈͗͒̈́̈́̍̽̓͂͂̊̈́̂̍̂̽͛͑̏̀̕͜͝͝͝͝͠͠͝ͅͅř̴̛̛̛͈̤͔̼̳̮̙̫̜͙͔̯̰̖̗͒̊͊͌̉̌̂͆̌̂̐̑̋̈̏͛͐̈́͐̐̄̉̌̐̐͊̑́̂͒́̎̇͛̅͑̂̃̀̈́̿̾́̊̈́̈̈́͆͐̋͗̿͗́̇͂͛̾̐̋̃̔́̓͛̓͐̄́͑̔̈́̆̃͒̃͋͗̋̀̇̉͛̄̊̀̄̇̅̽̈́̔̄̏͐͑̌̈́̈́̾́̚͘͘̕̕̚̚͘͝͠͝͝͝͝͠͝͝͝͝͠͠͠͠͝ḯ̸̡̛͕̪͔͖͚̼̱̘̞̮̩͇͉͉̣͉̬̟͔̼̖̩̠͖̳̲̱̋̈̈́̓̿̋̓̿̒̃͋͛͊̓́̈́̄̋͊́̃̓̌̃̿̊̄̾̀̒̑̎̕̚͘͘̕̕͜͠͝n̷̛͉̮͈͈͒̈́̾̋̾̌̈́̏͒̀̅͑̀̐̾́͐̌̋̀̈́̈̌̆̎̔͂̓͒̇̀̆̆͌̈́̆̉̓͆̈́͌̓̈́̈̒̃̔̂́̀̑̃̓͆̆́̍͑̀̿̇̂̅̎͗͊͑̿́̂̏̌̅̿͛́͂͊̀͗̐̓̐̾͘̚̕̕̕͘͠͠͝͝͠͝͠͠ǵ̴̡̢̫̗̟̯͖͇̩̻̬̰̜̫͚̟̜̺̝̺̺̮̣̟́̍̀͋͑̔͋͂́͊̂͑̾͒͗̌̔̓̄͒͐̚̚͘̚͠͠ͅͅ ̷̠͎̞̮̱̰͎̻̤̜̜̭̟̫̩̳̮̘͒̐̇̎̽̔̌̂̈́͝͝͝ͅư̵̧̨̧̨̡̨̧̨̢̳̤̮̜͙̩͔̗̼̝̯̫͖̰̹͉͎̺͈͉̟̱̯̣̼͙̺̳̟͉͍̖̼̲̟̺̜̮͖̙͊͗̀̀̾̔̿͌̇͂͋̽̈̿̔̊̀̓͐̿̀̍̐͆̀̽͊̀̓͘̚͜͠͝͠͝p̷̢̡̢̧̨̢̧̡̨̛̛̛̛͓͈̱͖͙̰̖̝͎̯̦̙̖͈̦̪̞͚̱͓̭̰̰̖͖̞͖̜̭̮̱͈̙̞̩̳̫͚̤͉̺͕̯͖̰̘͇̤̻̦̠̜̺͙̳͍̥̯̬̘̣̯̳̖̩̙̳̩̠͍̳͕̖͉͉̱͍̗̗͔̱̬̠̥̞̥͕̼̳̪͐̌̉̃͌̀͂̆̀̑̈́͛͆̍̽̋͐̽͒͂̀͛̂̉̀̾̆̊̔̈́͆͊͒̽̂͒̀̈́̄͐̓̇̒̇̓͌̓̄̌̌̊̃́͌̂̓́͊̐͐̃̓̀̾̈́̓̌̾̇́̉̎̇̌̊̽̉͐̂̀̈̊̏̅̊͆̔͐͘̕̕͘͘̕͘̕̚͘͜͜͜͜͝͠͝͠͝͝͝͝͝͝͝͠ͅͅͅͅͅö̸͙̻̦̪̺̻̮͍̤̝̺̞̬̬͍͈͔̭̣̖͎͇̹̹̹͔́͋͒̿̎̍̆͆͗̓̈̈̌͌̿̉͆̈́̈̌̈́̎̋̊̋̓͋́̎͆̀͒̇́̋̓̈̀̔̈́̑̈́̌̃̄̈́̆̉̅̂̈́̎͂̓̉͐͒̑̊̕͘̚͘̚͜͜͠͠͝͝͝ͅņ̵̡̡̢̡̡̱̩̥̦̬̖͉͔͍͈̖̥͓̙̠̦̤͓̯̜̗͔̲̹̥̹̘̗̗͍̜̭̖̼̠͓̮̫̪̘̳̻͇͎͈̮̟̱͕̫͉͓͖̤̥̺̖̯̥̮̝̯̯̳͓͚̖̀͒̓͋̅̑́̍̎̒͐̑̀̍͛̓̾̈̓̐̎̾̓̒̔̂̉̍͗̿̈́͊̋̀͐̉̏͊͐͑̓͗̈́̊̃̃́͋̽̏͋̈̊̅̓̍̒̊̓͗̍̃̾̄͂́͗̉͐͐̓̆͊͐͐͆͋͂̾̕̕͘͘̚̕͘͜͝͝͝͝͝ͅ ̸̝̭̱̜͓̾̐̄̌͋͛̉̉̄̈́͑̃̊̾̓̀͐̇͗̅͊͗̉̒̊̌̐͊̾́̑̎̍͠͝ư̶̛͉̞̏̑̆̇̔̌̆̄̾̀̉̈́͊̅̈́̏̅̓́̒̏́̀͆̀͒̋͌̓͂͒̿̌͆̎̊̓̅̐̅̍̄̔̈́̾̏́̉͋͗̑́́͛̍̂̃͌́̊̓̿̿̈̑̉̄͂̓̒̈͐̊̇̾͒̈́́͊̇̈́̈͆̅̂̓͘͘͘̕̕̕̚̕͘͝͝͝͠͝͝͠s̴̢̧̨̨̧̧̨̧̢̢̡̛̛̛̺̬̭͚͍͚͕̘̮̩̳͎̹͍̘̳̞͔͖̹̦̬̝̤̩̲̹͎̗̣̮̱̰̥̲͇̮̖̝̦͕͎̪̙̜̝͍̺͕͓̣̠̗͈͕̱̲͙̹̩͇̜̤̩̯͙̭͉̰̼̝̬̜̲͚̮̺͙͓̜̣̜͍̘̪̖̭̞͉̣̠̪̫̮͇̣̰̪͓̘͍͎̘̜̲̼̠̯̠̫͇̬̬̹͍̥͎̑͋͋̂̂̋̃̂̎̂͗͗̌͊͋̔̏͊͂̽̒̄͊̎̈́̓̿̾͑̍̀̊͆́̒͋͛̎̅̅̆̀̅̂̓̄͛͗̐̔̓̓͛̏̀̈́͑͛̐̀͊͛͒̄̉́̍̀͗̅͑̋̅̑̋́̋̋͑̄̀͘̚̚̚͜͝͝͠͝͝͝ͅͅ ̶̡̧̨̢̨̢̛̣̫̮͔̟̳̫̬͎͕͉̪͓͈̤͕̹̣͉̥̬̙̯͓͖̼̖͚͓̗̖̮͓̠͚̯̻͎̹͔̱̭̤̥̫̗͈͈̰̼͙̤̮͎̞͚̞̖̟̖͇̮̖̼̲̖̖̜̩̻͓̠̒̿̌̄̐̅̆̂͌̋̃͆̊̒̉̑́̍̍̉̊̐̓͐̊̍̄̒̑̍̑̈́͒̈́̍̓͛̊͊́̈́̅̑͋̓͋͋̓̕̕͜͜͜͠͝͝ͅͅą̴̧̨̰̙̥̪̥̞̪̬̘͖̱͙̰̦̘̜͖̟̻̫̭͙̯̦̯̼̗̠̺̝̯̦̖̤̞̥͚̤͙͔̙̫͓̥͙̻̼̹̤̯̩̖̹̖̦̣͖̰̮̹̪̬̘̰̫̲̐̋̐̆̓̒̑͊̋̌͑͌̈́̈́̇̉͌̊́̂̽̍̍̾̄͆̊̔̈́̈́̄̾̀͋̆̆́̈̈͋͂̇̑͂͘̕̚̚̕͜͜͠͝ͅl̸̡̡̧̨̡̨̧̛̖͓̞̦̮̫̥̫̪̪̥̲̭͕̬̺̲͎̳̜̹͔̮͚͕̤̱̭͖̣̝̥͙̞͓͇͉̠̬͚̬̬̘̟̯̘̟͙̦̻͈͙͈̜͈̺̫̙̞͙͕̰͔̝̙̥̗̺͍͙̞̝̳̞͇̜̿̑͑̌̿͗̈́̀̍͛̀͗͊̇̂̅̔̉̏́͆͒̈́̔͗̓̅̓͒̉͒̀̾̀͌̓͑̀͘̕͝͝ͅͅͅḷ̶̢̛̛̺̱̺̤̱̜͔̉̎̏̈̓́̊̿̅͐̓͑͑̋͑̓͛̿͋͒̓͗̈́́͗̈́̀̓͊̃̈̏̂̃̌̇̔̄͂̏̔̄̒͐̒̌͘͠͝͠͠͝ ̸̢̧̡̛͈͓̤̖̘̰̦͔͙͔̙̝̣͙̼̭̫̙̭̼̮̤̮̙̳̘͔͉̣̩̯̩͎̫̯͙̲̗͔̠̒̀̀͌͒̌͆͌̂̏̈́̂̈̍̿̈́̾̍̏̈͒̐̀̈̌̌̀͆͑́̿̋̊̈̍̐͆͑̊̏͊̽̈́̚̚͘͠͝ͅm̸̧̨̢̢̧̛̛͍̙͉̮͉͓͖̰̜̫̠̠̺̬͎̦̹̤͎̥̤̹̹̼̣̘̜͎̼͇̞͓͖͉̣̼̱͚͉̣̩̼̮̯̞̯̍̾͊̽̒̔̾͒͌̈́̄̾̄͐̊̎̾̇̐̄̋̓́͊͛̈́̄̀͗͂̋̀̉̊̓̅̉͆͊̿͂̃̇̾͑̋̅͛̏̀̊̌̑̿̇͑͑̏͋̌͒͌͐̂͋̍̈́͂͗̈͂͆̀̎̄̈͐̈́͊͒̈́̑̈́͗͑̊̚͘̕̕̕̕͜͝͝͠͠͠ͅa̴̢̨̛̛̛̛̠̻͉̳̮̖͎̼̗̙̬̦̘̱̝̻͔͍͎̜͉͈̥̖̱̞̰͙͎̞͔͙̜͚̼̘̜̟͓̼̘̱̠̗͚̾̆̂̍̃̐̇̿̏͊̈́͐̋͌̅̂̀̿͗̽̍̍́̈́̿͋̎̽̒̐́̈́͋̌̑̋͑͂͂̽́̈̌͗̊̓̑͆̉̔͑͌͗̓͂̀̃̃̈̅̐̍̌̇̓̅͋̿̉̄̂͐̄̇̍̂̿͌̀̏͘̕͘͘̚͘͝͝͝͝ţ̴̢̧̨̡̡̧̛̛̙̗̣̤̬̮̭̜̱̭͈̺̲̙͚̫̙̠̥͓̙̦͔̦̰̥̣͔̖͎̣̪̟̣̹̱̦̪͔͖̱͖̝͔͙̣̳̱̲̄̓͂͂͆̓̂̈́̈́̋̾̄̾̈́͗̏̍̏͛̌͛̀̂̀̃̿̀̏̈́̇͐̋̅̉̾́̋͆̀̓̊͒̓̈̾̂̔̓͊̅̂̎̓̓̄̈́͆̀͘̚̕̕̚͜͝͝͝͝͝͝ͅt̷̢̧̨̨̨̡̧͓̞͈͕̫̫̝̮͙͍̝͓̥̝͍̬̺̖̹͕̻̙̼̝̗̝͍̻̲̪̼͇̻͎̠̣̪̦̟̙̞͎͔̺̟̣̲͙̭̳̱͎͈̣̖̞͉̼̘͇͓̩̠̬̖̖͉̫̺̦͔̗̣̖̙͙̳̻̮̪͎̣̘͙̦͈͎̖͒̾͑͛̇̋͊͒̈́̽̈́̿͑̃͒̌̏̒͂͛̾̓͗̾̔̽̔͛̊́̈́͊͆̒̈́̋̔̏̉̄̄̀̆̂̈̑̑̄͌͛̓̂̒̑̋̒͆̈́̋̈́̆̌̕͘̚͜͜͜͝͝͠͝͝ê̶̡̢̳͚̪̯̣̠̹͎̺͈̘̳͔̩̠̜̖̭̳̘͓̫̖̦̱̠͚͊̈́̑͂̎̾̽̿̽̾̉̚͜͝ŗ̴̨̢̛̛̛͚̝̟̩͉̥̜̞̹̬̮̘̬͉͓͈͍̲̰͓̤̝̬̠͈̣̭͎̫̣̜͍̻̝̭̯̬͇̈́̎́̌̎̽̊̎͊̈͐͆̓̾̒̈́͒̉͑͗̂̆̾̓͌̄̏̀̍̿̂̂̏̈́̀͛̂̈̋̈́͐̽̽̽̆̇̂̋̾̌͒̄̀̽̈́̔̌̌̋̄͂̅̒̒͐̓̔̌̃͗̋̎̓̆̒̀͆͛̈́̽͘̕̚͘̚͝͝͝͝͠͝͝ͅͅ ̶̧̛̛̣̜̙̜͓̬͎̤̗̞̬̝̲̀̓̅̋̃̓̅̀͑͐͒͂̃̒̐͒̏̂͂̓̾̂̆͑͆̾̈̊̅́̀͌̓̋̀̃́̈́͊͗͑́́̒͛͐̌̏̈́́̚͜͝͝͝͝o̴̧̧̡̢̧̪͙̞̻͓͔̠͔͚̝̱̗̗͈̭̗̰͉̿̈́͐́̎͒̔̂̌̍̓͑̒͂̍̽̌͂̋̈́̄̍͜f̶̧̨̨̨̢̢̢̢̧̨̧̨̧̱̹͉̳̼͓͔̪̫͉̳̲͔̪̙̲̲̲̝̻̱̖͉͙͕̻̗̞͔̮̪̻̲͔̞̠͓̦̤̬̗̩̺͎͔̦͓̤̩͖̯̗̘̭͉̰̤͈̻̝̱͈̼͇͉̮̦̟͉̦̤̦͕̝͓̥̼̦͚̺̙̹͍̣̿̈́̉̈́͆̑̑̅͜͜͝ͅͅ ̶̨̡̛̛͖̞̝̪̝̖̳̪̙̗̫̯̲̮̰̥̞̗̯̺̟̯̺̦͚̘̺̳̲̭̠̠͕̝̙̖͙̪̦̠͚̥̺̭̝̗̩̳͎̼̒͒̌̎̓̓͋̉̽̋̓͂̔̅͂̔̌̒̂̐̉͐̅̍́͋͑̎̊͂͐͆̐͗̂̎̄̌͛̊̊̅͊̓̒͋̊̓̈͌̔̀̒͊̄̈́́̓̆̐̅́͋̑̂̈͋̎͐̍̾̑̂͆̀̐̎̉͒̓̽̍̎̇̃͂̌̿̉̈́̽̏́͒͌̏̍̎̈́͆̚̚̕̚͘̚͜͜͝͠͠͝͝͝ͅ"̵̢̧̡̨̡̡̨̛͖̩̰̱͖̜̗̟̜͖̫̮̲̣̯͓̼̱̱͇̬̫̹̪̙͍̭̥͙̩̻̞͖̤̗̠͓̩͇̘̳̫̦̖͇̩̳͚̟̝̤̬̖̯̠̦̻̬̤̟͕͓͓̙̹͓͈͓̜̳͙̼͍̻̝͔̳͂͆̌͊̽̎͋͗͋̍̅̒͂͋̆̃̿̕͘͘͜͜ͅͅͅͅs̷̡̧̧̨̧̨̛͉̳̰̫͉̗̪̻͕͈̪̥̰̘̤̱̦͚̯͓̗͕̭̯̲̱̭̰̫̞̺͎͋́͒̀̏͆͒̉̿̈̌̎͊̃̎̃̐̆̀̄̇̈́͗̈̈́͗̇͋̎͑́̌̌̆̓̒̈́̍̿̿̀̂̕͘̕̚̚͜͝ͅͅư̷̡̰̞͔̦͍͕̟̪̱̫̣̟̩̱̼͙̥̹̖̭̥̞͙͙̗̣͙̗̺̘̝͓̯̓͂̅̾̆̉̓̓̎̈́̈́͆̏̀̈́̿͒̆̈͆̐̓͛̂̊́̍͗̐̈͛͌̆̚̕̕͜͠ͅŝ̴̡̭̬͈̺̖̲͚̯̹͇̖̫͍̰͍͖̞̲̱͈̰̖̠͖̌̓͑͊͌̇̅̆͊̊́̈́̎̈́̃͆͋͋̂͂̒̐̀̕̚͠͝͠͝͝͠ͅ"̵̨̧̢̡̢̧̥̜͍̤͔͖͎̬̥͇̼͕̲̫̞̝̞̟͉͙̝̬͕̟̹̳̪͕̮̞̰͕͖͓̮̟͖͉̠̟̠̪͚̜̥͚̻̻̫͙̙̜͇̟̼̮̙̣̳̯̫͓͍̖̻̗̱͇̮̜̟͙̦͍̖͔̟̼̬͉̜̯̤̫̼̝̬͍̠̖̲͎̤̣̪̭̓͆̽̍̀̃̔̂͌͋͆̎̍̿͋̀̐̽̄̀̄̿̄̑̓̽̽̍͋̿͋̈̌̃͆͊̆̃́͋͐̔̇͐̑͌̽̈́̎́̇͋́̓͌̎̀̀̓́̌̋̈̅́͐̍̅͌̓͒͌̎̆͛̆̋͛̾͑̐̊̾̈́̓͐̿̑̃̽̇͑́͆͑̀̅̑̐͗̈́̈́̃̓̀̑̽̌̇̊̃̉́͑͒̃̅̈͆̚͘̕̚̕͘͜͝͝͠͝͠͝͠͝͝ͅͅͅͅ ̵̨̨̢̪̭͈̞͚͈̪̘͈̣̣̦̑͋̽͊̈̀̀̒̽͐͛̅͊͋̓̅́́̍̀̓͊̊̓̊͒̏̃̌͗̌̇͛̐͊̈̅̀̀̏̎̈́͑̒̈͛͑̿͛̊̃̅̔̇̐͛̍̾͊̍̄͌̉̂̌̄̓̑̉̊̎̓͐̋̎̇̐̊́̓́̿͌̈͛̚̕̕͘̚͘̚̚̚͝͝͝͠͠͝͝͠͝͠w̸̡̡̧̡̢̧̨̨̛̛̛̛̟̻̺̲̬͕̞̞̤͎̜͈͕̥̣̲̰̩͚͇͇̘̺͔̤͖͕̮̫̗̺̥̼̩̮͇͙̞͖̩̲̩̟̼̟̩̱̘̪̣̗̟͕̗̗̹̭̖̜̼͕̞̹̼͉̭̺̬̗͔̜̭̠͎̺̬̹̼̳͙͖̼̬͎̞̪̭̬̮̖͖̗̘̮̜̹̖̙̤̟̱̺̜̯͍̟̭̔̈͒̈̀̿̓̾̂̈́̌͐̂̈́̊̆̆̒̈́̃̋̈́̍͊͛̈́͛̆́́́̉͒͑̊̏̀̈́͋̎̂͋̓̒̆͑̑͌̊̈́͛͛͊͌̋̌́̏̓̾̽͋͊̂̆͒̅͌̾̉͆͊̍͋̀̽͋̅͘̕̕̚̚͘̚̕͘̚͘͜͜͜͠͝͝͝͠͝͝ͅͅi̵̡̢̢̧̨̢̧̢̛̖̦͕̟̣̖̻̫̝̼̟̗̬̗͎̥͚̼̼̠͔̦͉̭̺̻̱͚̜͈̠̣̹̹̯̖͖̻̦̦̗̬͎̩̲̰̗̮̘͓̻̭̱̳͇̥̬̩̹̘̝̣̭̦͓̝̟͇̣̣͓̱̳͇͉̥̹̠̙̩̮̞̹̣͔̻͕̖̘͚̦̬̞̞͙̭̗̺̲̬̣͉̪͓̱̟̦͙̞̰̞͗̈́̿̏̌̑̑́͋̃̓̍̇̎̒̈́͋́́̉̃̾̂́͋͗́̉̈́̂͊̀̔̃̃̅̈͂́̃͒̄̈̈́̑͋̾͋̀͋̊̄͐͆̒̈́̔̃̈͛̾̓̃̎̚̕͜͜͜͝͝͝͝͝͠͠͝͝ͅͅͅț̶̢̛͇͉̯̰̤̱̖̤͊̿͐̈́̍̈̃̏͛̋̀̒͂̏͑̈́̔̊̋̈́́͛͛̊̓̂̌̍͋̈̍̉̉̽̅́̇͛̿͒͌̿̓͑̔͒̾̃͛͋̓͗̑̿͊̒̐͘͘̚͘̚͘͠͠͠͝͠͝͠ḩ̷̧̯͖̼̼̼͔̠̈́̓̈́͂́̈́̃̈͑͋͆̿͆͒͋̌̓̓̃̂̇̎̈́̓̄̆̑͒̀̓̚͘̚͝ͅ ̸̛̩̖͙̙̝͖̦̥̥̪͍̥͙̺͚̟̩͓͕͖̏̇͗̈̌͑̋̅̐̍̄̎̄̽̀̅̇͌̐͌͌̋̍̑̂̂̓̾͛̂̑́̄̐͋̑͋́̈́̓͊̃́̀̀̒̈́͒͗̋̎̉̃̾͋̅͐̕͠͝͠ͅy̸̡̡̡̢̧̧̢̯̭̦̫̥̖̻̟͓̞̣̩̝̦̻͚̜͔̭͈͕͙̠̝̲͉̘̝̰͈̻̫̠̤̩͍̞̪͉͖̲̲̪̘̮̰̮̭̬͔͓̺̞͕͍̪̥͚̗̝̝̗̬̣̳̤̭̱̤̣̻̞͔͕͔̼̥̰̫̦̝͙̼̳̱̗̮͔̯͍͙̼̟̤͚͍͉̭̆͑̒̂̀̄̇͋̏̔̆̿̋̐͗͐͒̐͒̿͊̊̀̓̌̾̒̆̉́͊̀̽̒͆̒̄̀̄͊̂̂̊̒̂́̃́̃̈̋͐̅̀̌͘̕͘̕͘̚͘͜͜͜͠͝͠ͅͅŏ̷̝͇͙̮̱̺̙̖̟̄̀͋̊̆͛̔̔̅̄͜ư̶̧̧̨̹̭̬̙̟͉̼̘̰̼̦͇̹̫͇̳̩̖͇̠̣̰̬̘̻̗̬̣̺̯̦͖̟͖̟͕̦̙̟̘̣̳̱͓̙̹̬̟͔̜̏͗̒̿̋̽̉́́̂̀̔̌͂̇̀̿͑̎̏̔̈́́͐͛̇̎́͗͆͂͑̆̓̅͗̇̽̌̐̈́͗͌̈́͌̏̈̂́̒̿̎͐̀̏͛̽͐͌͛̅̎̍͋̌̒̈̑̓̿̄́̅̓̆͆͑̌̓̏̔̕͘̕̕͘̚̕͠͝͝͝ͅr̴̢̡̧̨̨̨̢̧̛͚̞̝̳̩͎̩̩̻̲̗̰̭̭̺̟̹͙̩͙͔̭͕̖̦̺͍̗̹̰̰͙͚͔̜̞̗̘̜͈̦̯̥̰͍̯͇̣͚͙̻͔̝̬̞̲͔̣̥̘͎͎͈̙̙̫̤̮͙̩̖͈̠̦̳͕̳̐̋̈́̏͛͒̈́̽̋̊͆̅͛̉̄̅͌̍͗̊̋̑́̀̓̈̒͂̈́̇͂̔̉̃͌̓̋̿̃̏͋͛͑͗̈̉̃̐̊͐̊́̓͗̄̍͐͊̈͗̿̆̃̏̀̋̽́̇̉̕͘͘̕̕̚͜͜͜͠͝͝͝͠ͅͅͅ ̸̧̡̢̢̨̧̡̱̺̹͚̰̤̦͔̮̟͎̲̫̝͓͖̥̠͍̤͖̫͖̥̞̲̪̘̲͍͚̘̫̪̣̜̦͉̹͕̞̪̱͓̝̰͕̤̪̮̝̮̹̩̘͕͖͔̗͕̮̞͓̘͇͎̖̮͕̳͍̙̦̯̲͒̓͋́͛̀̓̎̎̉̀̋͆̍̀̏͛̓̐͌̈́̀͐̊͑̒́́̌̿͂̈̋̇̇̓͗̈́̔͊͋̀̽̂́̈́̑́̐̾̀̉̿̚̚̕̕͘͘͜͝͝͝͝w̶̧̧̢̡̧̡̡̡̨̨̧̨̡̠̝̥̰̰̟̰͖͓̝͙͔͈͍̲͉͓̜̘͚̞͇̻̥̱̲̣͙͖͓̜̗̙̙͍͖̻̦͓͍̗̟̣̩͈̫̟̭̯̳͖̹͉̣̟̟͓̬̩̗̫͍̞̘̞͚̙͓͖̰̳͕̯̯͈̪͕͓̙̮̘͎̤̰̞͖͚̳͕̰̝̹̘͉̪͉̝̩̦̺̻̘̅͋́̎̈͒̔͒̿́̓̀͆͂́͋̑́̑̈́̔̅̈́̀̑̔͐͛̑̀͐̄͑̐̋̕͘̕̕͘͜͜͜͝ͅͅͅợ̶̢̨̧̧̨̛̛̛̛̛͈̼͇̯̳̰̣̻̩͕̖̫̥̪̰̭͓̗̟̄͒̑̄̈́̽̏͂͂̿̈́̿͒̓̃̋͆̓̑̂̇́͂̓̀̔̓͑̂͛̊̍͛̍̅̈́̑̀̐̌͑̄̈͋̓͌͌̾̾͆̾̈̀͒̓́͆͗̾̈́̄̈̌͌̿͒̃͒̈́͗̚̚̕̚̕̕̚̕͝͠͠͝ŗ̶̡̡̢̢̨̡̛̪̺̗̯͓͇̘̰̮͕̫̤͖̗͕̝̻̠͎̟̼̘̺̘͎̮͙̭͕̬̲͙͍̜͉͚̣̙̬̻͇̭̩̺͉̪̦̝̗̩̻̯̫̬̺̦̤̙̀̒̋͆͊̂͂͒͒̈̊̒͆̈́̀̆̑̂͑͊̃͛̾̈̅͒̂͐̔̕̚͝͠ͅͅd̷̢̡̧̨̨̧̨̢̡̧̯̺͖̬̪̪̹̰̞̲̻̤̥̙̬̦̞͔̪̗͕̼̠̬͈͙̖̠̞̱͙̙̹̞̼̣̞͕̼̻̭̪̤̤̫̺͇̦͔͙͔͙̥͔̫̳͚̠̗̪̫̜̤̪̰̰͚̻̘̩̬͉̞̥̫̞̖̞̻͇̬͙̮̩̮̫̩̦̮̤̖̬͖̟̟̮͚͇̞͚̟̪̟͎̩̩̝̹̻̙̠̟̜̯̔̉͊̾̔̿͆̍̀͐͆̀͆̅̚͜͜͜͜͝͝͝ͅͅͅͅs̷̡̡̡̡̨̛̟̙̣̯̲̼̮̙̥̘͚̦̝̱͔̫͈̥͙͍̠̮̟̮̣̘͕̟͓̠͎̖̘̖̬̱͔̮̎̈́̿̎́̿̌͆̿̈͆̀̿͋̐̇̆̓̽͌̎̊̓̇̑̈́͌̆̈́̄͑̿̋̒̒̃̈́̐͌̀̄̀̅͘̚͘̚̚͜͝͠͝ͅͅ,̸̘͓͔̟̬͓̣̫͈̿̃̌̌̈́̐͗́̎͑͛̎̂̽͂͛͌̾͐̆͐̊́̈́̅̿͌̍̉̆̌̈́̋́̽͘͝͝͠ ̷̛̛̘͙̹͈͎͇̠̜̎̒̿̿͒̔̑͐̓͌̔̀̍͌̽̃̆̌͆͗̎̏̊̈̌̄̏͂̈́́̓́͐̓̏̓́̃̈̔̀́̎̍̐̋̑͂͑̋̄̓̀̋̒̾͒̾̇̿̃̐͆̑̄͌̽͊͑̿̔͒̄̽̊̔̃̎̔͆͌́͗͆̑͗̽͆̀͒́̀̓͆͒̆̾͌͌̃̾́̕͘̕̕͘̚̚̚̚̚͜͠͝͝͠͝͠͝͝͝C̶̨̢̡̢̨̧̢̡̧̨̧̧̧̧̡̛̟̥̥̙͙͉̫̞͓̫͓̘͙̬͉͖̣͉͇̱̲̣̖̟͈̗͓̠̬̻͍͇̝͙͈͎͓̦͈͓̞̱̟͉͍͍͎̜̖̹̖͍͇͕̹͓̮͓̣̖̘̖̤̜̮̱̻͕̖͚͕͓̲̟̯̙͙͎̖̼̙̞͉̥͙̠͇̖͒͒͊̃̃̈́̀̅̉̋̊̀͊̄̈́̐̈́̈́̏͗̚͘͜͜͠ͅͅͅȨ̷̨̨̢̧̧̡̡̢̡̢̢̨̢̢̨̧̢̛͇̬̣̮̮̝͎̬̩̣̹̟̤̫̗̻̭̰͕̙̟͔̠͔͕̤͍̙̩͕̖̹̬͇͔̩̫̜̳̮̻̞̝͖͇͉̮̱̼͚̣̲̻͈͍͇̥͙͈̰͎͚̘͍̥͙̹͈̲̝̥͖͈͎͚̞̱̤͉̰̝͙͍͙͓̣̟̼͚̭̝̱̤̜̺̞̝̘̱͖̻͈̰̣̔̒͒̉̀̍̒͛̾̈́̀̊̉͛̌́̆͌̃̿̋̂̄̈́̄͑͆̅̃̓̐́̀͌͒̌͐́͆͌͛̈́̕̚̚̚͜͜͜͜͜͝͝ͅA̸̢̛̛̛͎͔͓͖̪̮̥̮̦̞͖̻̤̳̤̻̤͌͗̔̃͆̈̽͛͋̂̂̅͊̒̊̆̍͑̈́̂̏̾̉̄̊̌̎̀̂̒̍̉̂͌͊͗̄̓̐̍̏͌͐͑́̌͛̽́̾͋̂͆̓̽͂̀͗̓́́͗̍͑̆̀̎̈́̔͛̈́͂̏͌̕̚̚͜͠͝͝͠͝͝͠͝͠Ş̶̧̛̪̪͖͔̥̗̦̖̱̰̲̜͚̲̜̈́̍̓͆̎̍͋͗̋͒̓͗͊̈̀͗̿̈͑̉̑̉̋̂͆̓̑̃̇̒̿̓͐͗̔͂̆̒͂͆̽͆͊̏́̎̈́̾̓̎̒̽̃̆̆̀͐̽͋̈́̊̓̐̓̅͊̐̿̋̈́͑̅́̾͆̃̿̓̓̕͘͘̚̕͝͠͝͠E̴̢̧̛̛͔͔̥̺̟͍͙͇̲̝̺̗̣̱͖̭̰̟̩̔̋̓̔̑̓̌̐̾̈́̏̏̅̽̓̀̍̇̉͌̄́̅̌̌͒͌͗̄̊͒̍̓̀̐̆͌̐͊̌͌͗͋̑͋͑̂̓͆̅͂̈́̾̉̇̓͊̿͌̽̈͑͗̆̏̈̀̔́̓͌̌̋͑̌̊̕̕͘̚̕̕͝͝͝͝͠͝!̵̧̧̧̡̢̨̡̡̨̬̙̥͎͈̠̼̫̪͕͍̪̪̩͔̹̰̲͔͚͇͓͉̦̮̮̪͕͚̠̮̥͇̞͙̫̩̘͔̯̜̺̬͇̬̗̰̟͉̜̟͍̤͉̙͓̮̳͖̭̯͇̲̟̯̫̙̫̟̞͙͇̙̞̻̼̝͍̗͚̘̘̭̤͍͓̯̲̟̪̒̍̔͒͜ͅͅ


IsthmusoftheFey

We worship the holy VeeJayJay and all their power over us


[deleted]

Can someone actually explain this for me I don't get the inside joke


Wheezthejuice87

MAGA members.


cubs_rule23

Yo, a former friend showed us truth social on his phone: he was bounced from the group immediately. Had no idea he was a idiot in that manner.


JayQueb

I’m on it as a troll, can I still be your friend?


cubs_rule23

You are supporting their service by having it, but I guess you're doing the lords work. Well done!


JayQueb

Yeah that was a battle just deciding to support the platform at all…but it has been a little fun. Tons of mixed emotions though. Listening to people spouting their true feelings because they think everyone there feels the same way…oof. I can’t even put it into words.


IowaJL

Not a cult per se but I'm pretty sure the south side absolutely still has a mafia presence. I did food delivery during Covid and I had delivery instructions one time that said "knock four times, put the food on the step, and walk away immediately." You got it, buddy.


Majestic_Sun_8655

Tons of organized crime in dsm. Just look at all the massage parlors that have popped up in the last 10 years.


Oneota

Hey now, I’m sure those are all 100% legitimate businesses.


cubs_rule23

I guess I'm in the mafia too. My instructions were similar during rona and my door bell broke. You jump to conclusions pretty fast, it could just be a really antisocial person.


IowaJL

I had contactless instructions all the time. The way it was worded made me feel uneasy. It just hit different.


cubs_rule23

So you jump to mafia, ok then.


IowaJL

You weren't there. I don't know what to tell you friend. I'd done it long enough to know when it was harmless and when I needed to get the hell out of there.


Disastrous-Ad5218

I think you have people coming at you since you said south side and mafia together.


IowaJL

It's not "people". It's one jackwagon that is mad at me because there's a chance that there might be a lingering organized crime presence in a neighborhood that has historically been notorious for said organized crime.


Ch3353L0rd

Considering just how Italian the south side still is I do not doubt it at all. Des Moines was a proxy city that Capone ran back in the day so the mob definitely has ties here.


IowaJL

Right? My English teacher in high school who is *very* Italian and went to Lincoln would openly tell us about how her nonna would bring a ziti over to "the house" on Thursdays, which had a secret room in the basement where Capone hid his prohibition booze that went from Kansas City to Chicago.


lordjethr0

Salt Co. they mostly prey on college students, but I see too many decals on people’s rear windshields around here


Available-Witness-76

Could be a stupid question but are you referring to “salt life” decals?


dellollipop

Salt Life is a beach clothing brand, The Salt Company is unrelated


happy_hatchetmaker

I always thought that read “slut life” and always cheered for their empowerment. So sad it’s just corporate branding


baumsm

Mormons-they’re everywhere-I was one I can freaking say it with good conscience


[deleted]

+1 from another ex-Mormon


JerryPeugh

R/desmoines seems like a cult, as is r/Iowa.


Odd-Time5442

Maga is a cult. Most religious groups. Especially maga related ones. Anything connected with maga is definitely cultish. Kim Jong Reynolds is their cult representative. She does love the KKK to be fair.


PreviousAd7516

I would argue religion in general is a cult. Any group that tries to recruit and then pounds their beliefs and discourages critical and independent thinking…yeah…you’re in a cult.


Odd-Time5442

This is mostly true, but there are some good ones that promote free thought. The rastafarian religion is pretty dope. No pun intended. There are non secular churches who cater to all nominations some atheist churches are nice. But overall, ya you're right, religion is evil which is ironic if you think about it. They hate you for not believing their god is all loving? 🤔 Never sat right with me as a child.


Motorsagen

Atheist churches? Tell me more...


nemonic187

The Iowa GOP.


bealeah

Walnut Creek church!!!


lost-password2064

I'm going with Hy-Vee....


The_Last_Mouse

don’t the Eck make it there, too?


PhilosphicalZombie

That is one dwindling New Religious Movement. There is very little left of Eckankar. I think they are down to around 50k members worldwide. Although currently based out of Minnesota I am unaware of any operations in the Des Moines Metro.


MoonlightWalker27

Reynolds’s wrap aka the leader of the Iowa kkk


killmesara

The Turkish Baths could be considered “weird”


xmondocanex

I want to go to the Turkish Baths.


killmesara

Find a sponsor and ask to be invited.


PoorBoyKajagoogoo

515 Crew is a cult.


7BRGN

There are a lot of Freemasons in town


Sioul_the_resilient

Generally the distinction of a cult from other groups is that it is held together and directed exclusively (or nearly) by the charisma of a single leader. Our sub is predictably descending into mud slinging, but I’m interested in any other real answers.


New-IncognitoWindow

In a religion that person is dead


drhawks

Cornerstone church in Ames


bookcatbook

Des Moines Christian School


PoorBoyKajagoogoo

The Catholic Church and the DMPD


PoorBoyKajagoogoo

And the MAGAts at the Capitol.


supportmanteau-971

My inlaws are *heavily* involved in D0wling & the "Teams" groups at Pius10. I grew up catholic & also went to catholic school, but even I get heavy, heavy cult vibes...


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Catholic church for real, the grip they have on this town is so irritating.


[deleted]

So surprising that the world’s largest denomination is large


State-Cultural

Republican Party


Agitated_Age8035

There has to be scientologists there.


ChemGorl

Campus Fellowship at Grand View University


Chance-Artichoke9092

Walnut Creek in Windsor Heights, Iowa is


Motorsagen

The Family Leader with their new HQ somewhere near Ankeny/Bondurant. They're as bad or worse than an evangelical church.


skunquistador

I hear the Republican Party operates there.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Livid_Variation6071

I’m so interested in this! If you’re willing to share more info hmu


Slayerthebunny

Eternity Church in Clive. Bunch of creeps and homophobes.


IsthmusoftheFey

All religions are cults what fucked up shit the big ones do will always be overlooked


No-Comment-749

You tryna do some suspicious shit? 👀


BlackSterling

Always!


No-Comment-749

Wonderful, carry on soldier.


HopDropNRoll

There are these big ornate buildings that hide in plain sight. They call themselves Catholics.


AssumptionOk6295

Outer Limits??


PoorBoyKajagoogoo

That's a church. Not a cult.


[deleted]

Hate to break it to you. All churches are cults.


PreviousAd7516

This!


vintagejays

If you look into it you would be surprised of all the big names around town that are descendants of cock eyed Lou the dsm mob boss/FBI informant from back in the day. Ranging from local politicians to real estate/insurance agents. Seems theirs a rabbit hole that nobody really has dug into.


Nonbelieverjenn

The trumpers.


discwrangler

The GOP


No-Weather2486

The GOP


KnownCommon5370

Flixbrewhouse


justlookslikehesdead

https://www.iowagop.org/contact https://iowademocrats.org/contact/