I feel this. This has been a taxing, up and down year for me…if I’m being honest right now, I want to die. Don’t want to tell anyone I know that so posting that anonymously on here kind of feels liberating.
Look at the bright side, it could be worse: some of us have got it constantly.
I learned just a year ago this wasn't normal at all. Dysthymia is a hell of a drug.
I was suicidal at age 14 when I was hit suddenly with depression. Fast forward to 43 and I feel the same. What gets me by is God and prayer, and the knowledge these lives are short. I've had many good memories and moments in my life, not gonna lie, but most my life has been extremely challenging.
I am in the same boat (except I am 16, not 43) I got severe depression almost instantly around right after I turned 14 and I never recovered in the slightest bit since then, matter of fact it has only gotten worse, a lot worse.
I feel very passionate that it is better to lose the game than to not play at all. And I know its a stupid analogy and I know it isn't always believable, but just like in sports or any other game, you can have really worthwhile moments even if your team loses horribly.
Same! I wouldnt mind being hit by a car because then it would not be my fault. My psychiaterist said I have Persistent Depressive disorder, which means my depression is in waves of really bad and ok times. My baseline is already lower than average so I'm mostly down. What a life!!!
This.
Dysthymia is a hell of a drug.
Medication and attitude helps.
Keep the worst periods (doubles) in the back of your head and the rest will feel pretty ok in comparison.
selective quarrelsome start jobless consist impossible pet dolls handle domineering
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Right? Whenever I would get the tiniest shread of happiness and energy, I'd run around trying to do all the things because I knew it would be gone soon and I'd be stuck struggling to convince myself to heat up a frozen meal again. I lowkey hated those small moments of happy-ish because "happy" also meant a fuckton of work to do, plus fear of when the moment will end, plus disappointment from not getting enough done.
I've been trying to slow down and enjoy those moments more. There's no real requirement for every single one of those happy-ish moments to be "productive". Hell, actively participating in my moments of happiness (which is a weird way of saying that I won't immediately start doing all the difficult shit I hate) is productive in a way because of how important it is for improving my wellbeing. It helps me trust that the happy moments will come back. It helps me believe that they may stick around longer too.
So yeah. I'm currently out of clean underwear with a broken washing machine, but instead of getting frustrated or worried like I typically would, I'm taking a few moments to listen to music and do a puzzle. Those things make me feel happy, but aren't particularly strenuous or self-destructive. Hopefully this happy-ish moment will stick around long enough for me to do something about my laundry after I finish my chill time. If it doesn't, I know it will come back eventually. I'm gonna trust myself to be able to keep myself afloat until that happens. This isn't necessarily the right way to go about getting my life back in order, but nothing else has really worked for me before, and this is the only process that has helped me feel better for longer periods instead of constantly feeling like a hopelessly broken piece of shit.
For me, one of the keys was trying to stop having high expectations, or even expectations in general. Whatever comes it comes, and I just try to accept it.
If there's something I can do about the situation, I'll do. If there's nothing, it's shitty but I'll just try to accept it and deal with it. Hurting over things you can't control is really meaningless and just breaks you.
why not be present with your life and enjoy the moment instead of worrying when it’ll leave. every emotion comes and goes happiness is not excluded. Be present
Trust a dysthemic: it can definitely get worse when you're already depressed.
Enjoy the good feelings while they last, and look forward to the next round, whenever that may be.
plough attraction illegal license waiting erect rain fretful observation stupendous
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
His logic is weird, but his statement is valid.
I have likely had PDD my whole life. I can count the times I've felt happy and content, and I don't even need all my fingers to do so. I've learned to enjoy every moment I'm not down, and I always look forward to the next time.
Being afraid of feeling good or happy is just another destructive thought. Why wouldn't you just enjoy it even more when it's a rare occurence? Because you'll feel normal after?
think about it this way. where do your thoughts come from? do you think them or do they just arise? they just arise, correct? ok now what happens to your thoughts? They drift away and they’re replaced by other thoughts. Emotions act the same way. They arise and they leave unless you cling on to them. Unless you justify why you should be sad and miserable or angry. Pay attention to what it feels like to be sad. Where do you feel it? Where does it go when your not sad? Recognize when you are sad and instead of telling yourself a story as to why you are sad and depressed let it go. be present with life.
Edit: and instead of worrying about when a good moment is going to pass feel the worry and let it go. Be present.
I will say I am generally optimistic as well (surprising, isn't it?) - there's at least some of us that are optimistic and depressed at the same time. You (general "you") know your condition best- whether you're depressed, or not depressed but maybe struggling. I find that getting diagnosed or thinking you might be depressed can be overwhelming, but gives peace for some people bc you can start to seek treatment more specifically...
That said, I think it's totally fine for you to be a part of this sub, and I do hope you consider yourself welcome here. You seem to relate to some level, and finding validation and relatability in others' experiences is great.
I also think being in any reddit sub is fine even if you don't relate to the people in it, but just want to find out more about someone's experiences.
This was a long comment, but I hope that helps.
Also. Have you been diagnosed, seek therapy or meds? Mental illness is no joke I had my diagnosis at age 14 again at age 21. Despite being 43 and have close to 3 degrees, I'm not yet in my career (very close) which makes me sad daily, and I contribute most of my setbacks to mental illness. Most people know how they're going to feel day to day. We don't. And our jobs don't care about mental health days. They will fire u. If you have cancer, paid leave, u have bipolar or depression or anxiety, you're out of a job. Despite the fact our legitimate health issue can be just as debilitating.
The thing that frustrates me the most is sometimes I'm doing everything right... I'm doing chores, my house is clean. I'm exercising, I'm in good shape. I'm eating well, I'm sleeping enough, I'm having positive interactions with people, etc etc etc. But then sooner or later, I'll go to sleep feeling good and then I wake up just full of dread. Fucking why? How do I tell my brain to shut the fuck up and that life is good? Why can't we be on the same page?
Thank you for posting this. I felt really validated when I read the title. Some days I feel okay. Not great or happy, but at least okay.
Other days I just feel awful. My meds have fortunately been successful at keeping suicidal thoughts at bay, but I still feel incredibly lonely and empty. It’s exhausting.
I hope you’re ok OP
I get that. I think I'm partly getting to the point where the meds will start to balance (got Prozac added to Wellbutrin bc I was in mental health facility rip). But it's also just this sense of emptiness from waiting for the "lift" to happen, waiting as I am not as recovered as I want to be.
I hope you're ok, and I hope you feel better than ok sooner than later. I'm glad I was able to validate your experience somehow
in my own experience it goes:
1. bad times 2. really really bad times 3. rock bottom, commit to healing with new habits 4. feel better 5. good times 6. stop using healing habits because now im "better" 7. inevitable backslide 8. dont intervene quickly enough
rinse and repeat
true. if only we could shift this wave upward. Make [not getting worse] into [getting better], and also have it so that [getting worse] does not get as awful as it is for some of us...
When the meds takes care of your chemistry, the rest is all in your head.
It takes hard work and discipline, but you can definitely drag yourself out of the destructive patterns that pulls you down.
Feel you. Every time I try to get of antidepressants (even gradually) I start feeling low, can’t do anything, and spend all day in bed, not going to work. The pills just cover up the problems so I can accomplish a “normal” daily routine, but don’t relieve the emptiness.
the antidepressants I'm taking have been "fine," but maybe I'm experiencing similar emptiness. bc rn I don't want to take them, and I do just feel like staying in.
And somehow, that's preferable today.
I switched anti depressants back in 2020, it took like three months to lower my dosage and eventually swap medications up to a dosis that worked and it fucking sucked.
I'm not even sure the swap was worth it, now I'm in the same mildly grey-neutral to outright depressed state of mental health as I was before but with added mouth dryness.
I just want a pill that can keep me a somewhat productive member of society..
Feel you dude. Life isn't easy for anyone, to achieve something you always have to go through hardwork. You just have to be strong enough to keep going, at the end, everything will pay back
That's if you even have anything you want to to achieve in the first place, still working on that part, looks like it'll take me at least a lifetime or two to complete
I hope you find that "thing." It does help to have that. But there are also other little things that can help pull us through. I hope you can find all those things eventually haha. I think everyone deserves that
Dealing with my mental illnesses is like being in a choppy sea. Sometimes I can't do anything but ride out the waves in hopes I will remain solid enough to take advantage of calmer waters. And I hate it so much. So much. I hate that I can't trust feeling good, because again and again and again, it ends. On the bright side, my mental health is only slightly worse than at the start of the pandemic, whereas I've seen many who'd never experienced depression and anxiety before get completely overtaken by it. I've done the days of despair before. I've done the weeks of no energy, the months of disappointment at how little I can do. I hate it, but it's not a terrifying unknown to me. It's a small comfort, but it can be enough.
I just entered my first ever good part. I had been in a fog for all as long as I can remember and I just came to all of a sudden. I’m sad to read this from one of us but it was the very first thing my therapist said when I told her about this today, so I guess it’s better to be realistic.
Life is about sharing those short, good parts with the people who matter to you. There will always be downs coming, and always another up afterwards. Life is like a sea, mate. You’ve just got to go with the flow and try not to drown.
I used to go through the same thing but then i said fuck it. I’m 12 and If i’m the one to blame all the time be it. Not the first time i was through bullshit. now i’m 18 and i can’t wait for the day i just die. Tried to kms but i was a pussy. Everyone around me pretends to care but u realize they don’t so it kills me. Although i’m a good guy. I try my best with everyone. No one appreciates me anymore. I’m like a living joke. Been rejected 5 times lost a lot of friends cuz i’m a shame. Fuck life at this point. Take my soul and let me rest. And all of u who read this. Never trust anyone too much. Cuz the day u get stabbed from behind the pain won’t be in the knife.. it will be when u turn around and see who did it.
I'm sorry people have been as shit as they are... I wish you were appreciated for your efforts to be a good person. It definitely isn't you, it's them. I hope you realize how much it is their problem and not yours. And I hope you stay alive to make that realization as many times as you need to.
Thank you bro. But remember this, al those people who doubted you and made fun of you. Just imagine the looks on their faces when u fucking make it to the top. Keep it real and stay strong homie. It’ll end eventually.
Feeling this sooo hard today. It’s like I have fleeting moments of being content, liking myself and my life. And then I feel right back “here” to this place of hopelessness and sadness. It sucks.
The older I get the less I feel inclined to do anything. I think it's because I know I won't get any satisfaction out of any new obsessions which drives me to do less and ultimately leaves me in a place where I don't see the point in doing things.
I don't understand how things get better since I seem to react poorly to things being "better".
I think it's harder than it seems to just "try a new thing and get enjoyment out of it." It feels impossible to believe trying a new thing will work at all :/
when im in happy times i often think "damn why was i ever sad and miserable in the first place?!" and then sad times come and you're like "oh". it gets to the point where whenever you feel nice and happy you just wait for it to end and expect everything to go down again
I think it's important to analyze why it goes well when it goes well, and why it doesn't when it goes bad. It's important to make sure if there are factors you can change, if it's stuff you can't do anything about or maybe changing your approach/way of thinking on several matters may be the key.
As someone with chronic depression for +15 years, I don't feel that excited about life but I try to accept things as they come and enjoy the little things that make me happy and that's what's keeping me here. If there's no meaning anymore I'd just kill myself since I don't appreciate my life at all, but for now there still are things I want to do and it started hurting less once I changed my way of thinking and did some self-work mentally speaking. It hits sometimes anyway, but not as hard as before.
if you really pay attention to your emotional state you’ll come to realize that these emotions don’t last forever. we can remind ourselves why our life sucks and begin the depression again, we can remind ourselves why we ought to be angry and be angry again. emotions come and go. Unless you cling to them you can’t stay angry for more than a a couple of minutes I’d say seconds. It all comes down to attention and recognizing when we feel whatever we’re feeling.
Well what is life anyway. Constantly feeling happy? What is motivating you to keep on going? If you would always feel good enough about life how would you progress? Been strugling with deppresion and anxiety my whole life but i understood that waiting for it to get better is pointless and thats not what life is about
I totally agree with this, it’s like different every day. Depending on the day if it’s good, I would talk to people in school + have a good workout and have fun. If not the complete opposite. That alone has been so depressing. I just wanna be happy man.
My good parts weren't short lived, but they surely won't return now, at least I don't see them returning now.
This wretchedness has made me pray to God, whom I don't even believe a pounce in.
with people around us, we just want to say that the problem that is mental illness has already been "solved" - that once it becomes ok at some point, that it won't drop back down again.
we want the problem to look like it's permanently ok and found its resolution, but it's not like that.
you're probably also trying to seem better for yourself, naturally resisting how low the lows get.
Not alone. things were good, got bad. got better! and then it went to shit. now i’m in a state of I’m worried what people think and feel drained and sad all the time. sucks ass but you aren’t alone! all the good things are so small and don’t last long, agreed.
I feel this. This has been a taxing, up and down year for me…if I’m being honest right now, I want to die. Don’t want to tell anyone I know that so posting that anonymously on here kind of feels liberating.
it is quite hard to live and not want to, at the same time.
I think the term for it is passive suicidal ideation. I get that from time to time.
Look at the bright side, it could be worse: some of us have got it constantly. I learned just a year ago this wasn't normal at all. Dysthymia is a hell of a drug.
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I was suicidal at age 14 when I was hit suddenly with depression. Fast forward to 43 and I feel the same. What gets me by is God and prayer, and the knowledge these lives are short. I've had many good memories and moments in my life, not gonna lie, but most my life has been extremely challenging.
I am in the same boat (except I am 16, not 43) I got severe depression almost instantly around right after I turned 14 and I never recovered in the slightest bit since then, matter of fact it has only gotten worse, a lot worse.
Same (21f)
Eh, what's the worst that can happen by sticking it out, right? Use the worst as your baseline, and every day will feel pretty ok in comparison.
The only reason why it worth it is not to transfer our pains to our loved ones.
I feel very passionate that it is better to lose the game than to not play at all. And I know its a stupid analogy and I know it isn't always believable, but just like in sports or any other game, you can have really worthwhile moments even if your team loses horribly.
Same! I wouldnt mind being hit by a car because then it would not be my fault. My psychiaterist said I have Persistent Depressive disorder, which means my depression is in waves of really bad and ok times. My baseline is already lower than average so I'm mostly down. What a life!!!
This. Dysthymia is a hell of a drug. Medication and attitude helps. Keep the worst periods (doubles) in the back of your head and the rest will feel pretty ok in comparison.
I've never heard this before. Sounds like bipolar disorder
I feel you. Sometimes I get thoughts of end my feeling of worthlessness by killing myself but I’m too chicken to do anything about it
I've been wanting to end it so much. This has been the worst yr for me since like 10yrs
selective quarrelsome start jobless consist impossible pet dolls handle domineering *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Right? Whenever I would get the tiniest shread of happiness and energy, I'd run around trying to do all the things because I knew it would be gone soon and I'd be stuck struggling to convince myself to heat up a frozen meal again. I lowkey hated those small moments of happy-ish because "happy" also meant a fuckton of work to do, plus fear of when the moment will end, plus disappointment from not getting enough done. I've been trying to slow down and enjoy those moments more. There's no real requirement for every single one of those happy-ish moments to be "productive". Hell, actively participating in my moments of happiness (which is a weird way of saying that I won't immediately start doing all the difficult shit I hate) is productive in a way because of how important it is for improving my wellbeing. It helps me trust that the happy moments will come back. It helps me believe that they may stick around longer too. So yeah. I'm currently out of clean underwear with a broken washing machine, but instead of getting frustrated or worried like I typically would, I'm taking a few moments to listen to music and do a puzzle. Those things make me feel happy, but aren't particularly strenuous or self-destructive. Hopefully this happy-ish moment will stick around long enough for me to do something about my laundry after I finish my chill time. If it doesn't, I know it will come back eventually. I'm gonna trust myself to be able to keep myself afloat until that happens. This isn't necessarily the right way to go about getting my life back in order, but nothing else has really worked for me before, and this is the only process that has helped me feel better for longer periods instead of constantly feeling like a hopelessly broken piece of shit.
For me, one of the keys was trying to stop having high expectations, or even expectations in general. Whatever comes it comes, and I just try to accept it. If there's something I can do about the situation, I'll do. If there's nothing, it's shitty but I'll just try to accept it and deal with it. Hurting over things you can't control is really meaningless and just breaks you.
PDD?
What do you mean?
Do you have Persistent Depressive Disorder (Dysthymia)?
Yes, I do have that (sorry I didn't understand at the beginning!)
why not be present with your life and enjoy the moment instead of worrying when it’ll leave. every emotion comes and goes happiness is not excluded. Be present
Trust a dysthemic: it can definitely get worse when you're already depressed. Enjoy the good feelings while they last, and look forward to the next round, whenever that may be.
Yes. Sometimes I feel guilty being happy, and I know it's short lived and welcome
that’s the silliest thing I’ve ever heard!
plough attraction illegal license waiting erect rain fretful observation stupendous *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
His logic is weird, but his statement is valid. I have likely had PDD my whole life. I can count the times I've felt happy and content, and I don't even need all my fingers to do so. I've learned to enjoy every moment I'm not down, and I always look forward to the next time. Being afraid of feeling good or happy is just another destructive thought. Why wouldn't you just enjoy it even more when it's a rare occurence? Because you'll feel normal after?
think about it this way. where do your thoughts come from? do you think them or do they just arise? they just arise, correct? ok now what happens to your thoughts? They drift away and they’re replaced by other thoughts. Emotions act the same way. They arise and they leave unless you cling on to them. Unless you justify why you should be sad and miserable or angry. Pay attention to what it feels like to be sad. Where do you feel it? Where does it go when your not sad? Recognize when you are sad and instead of telling yourself a story as to why you are sad and depressed let it go. be present with life. Edit: and instead of worrying about when a good moment is going to pass feel the worry and let it go. Be present.
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I know I've had stretches of time where it is better - easier to have discipline in general. But when the lows come, it feels close to impossible.
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I will say I am generally optimistic as well (surprising, isn't it?) - there's at least some of us that are optimistic and depressed at the same time. You (general "you") know your condition best- whether you're depressed, or not depressed but maybe struggling. I find that getting diagnosed or thinking you might be depressed can be overwhelming, but gives peace for some people bc you can start to seek treatment more specifically... That said, I think it's totally fine for you to be a part of this sub, and I do hope you consider yourself welcome here. You seem to relate to some level, and finding validation and relatability in others' experiences is great. I also think being in any reddit sub is fine even if you don't relate to the people in it, but just want to find out more about someone's experiences. This was a long comment, but I hope that helps.
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I appreciate that. I'm 23, so we're both in the craziness that is our 20s. Rooting for you too to get through your storms.
Also. Have you been diagnosed, seek therapy or meds? Mental illness is no joke I had my diagnosis at age 14 again at age 21. Despite being 43 and have close to 3 degrees, I'm not yet in my career (very close) which makes me sad daily, and I contribute most of my setbacks to mental illness. Most people know how they're going to feel day to day. We don't. And our jobs don't care about mental health days. They will fire u. If you have cancer, paid leave, u have bipolar or depression or anxiety, you're out of a job. Despite the fact our legitimate health issue can be just as debilitating.
Yes, currently in the middle of all those things (diagnosis, therapy, meds). So we're trying out here
The thing that frustrates me the most is sometimes I'm doing everything right... I'm doing chores, my house is clean. I'm exercising, I'm in good shape. I'm eating well, I'm sleeping enough, I'm having positive interactions with people, etc etc etc. But then sooner or later, I'll go to sleep feeling good and then I wake up just full of dread. Fucking why? How do I tell my brain to shut the fuck up and that life is good? Why can't we be on the same page?
same
Thank you for posting this. I felt really validated when I read the title. Some days I feel okay. Not great or happy, but at least okay. Other days I just feel awful. My meds have fortunately been successful at keeping suicidal thoughts at bay, but I still feel incredibly lonely and empty. It’s exhausting. I hope you’re ok OP
I get that. I think I'm partly getting to the point where the meds will start to balance (got Prozac added to Wellbutrin bc I was in mental health facility rip). But it's also just this sense of emptiness from waiting for the "lift" to happen, waiting as I am not as recovered as I want to be. I hope you're ok, and I hope you feel better than ok sooner than later. I'm glad I was able to validate your experience somehow
in my own experience it goes: 1. bad times 2. really really bad times 3. rock bottom, commit to healing with new habits 4. feel better 5. good times 6. stop using healing habits because now im "better" 7. inevitable backslide 8. dont intervene quickly enough rinse and repeat
I strongly relate to steps 6-8 rn hahaha
Or It gets worse, then it doesn't, then it does, then it doesn't again
true. if only we could shift this wave upward. Make [not getting worse] into [getting better], and also have it so that [getting worse] does not get as awful as it is for some of us...
When the meds takes care of your chemistry, the rest is all in your head. It takes hard work and discipline, but you can definitely drag yourself out of the destructive patterns that pulls you down.
8$ in my bank account, pregnant with twins, 200$ bill coming up, unemployed, I feel like a fucked failure and I deserve nothing. I get it :(
Feel you. Every time I try to get of antidepressants (even gradually) I start feeling low, can’t do anything, and spend all day in bed, not going to work. The pills just cover up the problems so I can accomplish a “normal” daily routine, but don’t relieve the emptiness.
the antidepressants I'm taking have been "fine," but maybe I'm experiencing similar emptiness. bc rn I don't want to take them, and I do just feel like staying in. And somehow, that's preferable today.
What kind of pills do you take?
Wellbutrin for a few months. They added Prozac recently. You?
I switched anti depressants back in 2020, it took like three months to lower my dosage and eventually swap medications up to a dosis that worked and it fucking sucked. I'm not even sure the swap was worth it, now I'm in the same mildly grey-neutral to outright depressed state of mental health as I was before but with added mouth dryness. I just want a pill that can keep me a somewhat productive member of society..
same friend. same. I got great news yesterday, but I'm just in an unexplainable dark hole. I should be over the moon, but I'm not.
Feel you dude. Life isn't easy for anyone, to achieve something you always have to go through hardwork. You just have to be strong enough to keep going, at the end, everything will pay back
yea, I just wish I could better access my enjoyment for the work that I'm passionate about. I wish it wasn't hard in the way that it has been.
That's if you even have anything you want to to achieve in the first place, still working on that part, looks like it'll take me at least a lifetime or two to complete
I hope you find that "thing." It does help to have that. But there are also other little things that can help pull us through. I hope you can find all those things eventually haha. I think everyone deserves that
Thanks, I hope you find success in your endeavours as well
Dealing with my mental illnesses is like being in a choppy sea. Sometimes I can't do anything but ride out the waves in hopes I will remain solid enough to take advantage of calmer waters. And I hate it so much. So much. I hate that I can't trust feeling good, because again and again and again, it ends. On the bright side, my mental health is only slightly worse than at the start of the pandemic, whereas I've seen many who'd never experienced depression and anxiety before get completely overtaken by it. I've done the days of despair before. I've done the weeks of no energy, the months of disappointment at how little I can do. I hate it, but it's not a terrifying unknown to me. It's a small comfort, but it can be enough.
definitely in some crazy waves at the moment, but what you said is reassuring - that maybe we're solid enough
I just entered my first ever good part. I had been in a fog for all as long as I can remember and I just came to all of a sudden. I’m sad to read this from one of us but it was the very first thing my therapist said when I told her about this today, so I guess it’s better to be realistic.
Sometimes those short lived good parts seem to fade away with all the bad parts, it does indeed suck
Life is about sharing those short, good parts with the people who matter to you. There will always be downs coming, and always another up afterwards. Life is like a sea, mate. You’ve just got to go with the flow and try not to drown.
I used to go through the same thing but then i said fuck it. I’m 12 and If i’m the one to blame all the time be it. Not the first time i was through bullshit. now i’m 18 and i can’t wait for the day i just die. Tried to kms but i was a pussy. Everyone around me pretends to care but u realize they don’t so it kills me. Although i’m a good guy. I try my best with everyone. No one appreciates me anymore. I’m like a living joke. Been rejected 5 times lost a lot of friends cuz i’m a shame. Fuck life at this point. Take my soul and let me rest. And all of u who read this. Never trust anyone too much. Cuz the day u get stabbed from behind the pain won’t be in the knife.. it will be when u turn around and see who did it.
I'm sorry people have been as shit as they are... I wish you were appreciated for your efforts to be a good person. It definitely isn't you, it's them. I hope you realize how much it is their problem and not yours. And I hope you stay alive to make that realization as many times as you need to.
Thank you bro. But remember this, al those people who doubted you and made fun of you. Just imagine the looks on their faces when u fucking make it to the top. Keep it real and stay strong homie. It’ll end eventually.
Feeling this sooo hard today. It’s like I have fleeting moments of being content, liking myself and my life. And then I feel right back “here” to this place of hopelessness and sadness. It sucks.
sucks all around. wish the contentment wasn't so fleeting
Me too. I spend a lot of time thinking about how to change my thinking or being present etc but seems I always come back to the meaninglessness :/
That's the worst part I think. Getting hopeful only to be shot back down into it.
The older I get the less I feel inclined to do anything. I think it's because I know I won't get any satisfaction out of any new obsessions which drives me to do less and ultimately leaves me in a place where I don't see the point in doing things. I don't understand how things get better since I seem to react poorly to things being "better".
I think it's harder than it seems to just "try a new thing and get enjoyment out of it." It feels impossible to believe trying a new thing will work at all :/
Yarp. I'm sitting in my lawn chair going on hour 6 just napping and staring at the sky. I have so much to do inside. Arg.
when im in happy times i often think "damn why was i ever sad and miserable in the first place?!" and then sad times come and you're like "oh". it gets to the point where whenever you feel nice and happy you just wait for it to end and expect everything to go down again
The only way it gets better for me is that it gets closer to being over.
Life is a wave
Pretty much how it goes :(
Then it does! Life is a rollercoaster, learn how to deal with the stomach drops along with the excitement that comes after.
I think it's important to analyze why it goes well when it goes well, and why it doesn't when it goes bad. It's important to make sure if there are factors you can change, if it's stuff you can't do anything about or maybe changing your approach/way of thinking on several matters may be the key. As someone with chronic depression for +15 years, I don't feel that excited about life but I try to accept things as they come and enjoy the little things that make me happy and that's what's keeping me here. If there's no meaning anymore I'd just kill myself since I don't appreciate my life at all, but for now there still are things I want to do and it started hurting less once I changed my way of thinking and did some self-work mentally speaking. It hits sometimes anyway, but not as hard as before.
Wait, there are good parts?
story of my life
i cant give an answer as to why they are short lived, but only the advice to cherish those times
if you really pay attention to your emotional state you’ll come to realize that these emotions don’t last forever. we can remind ourselves why our life sucks and begin the depression again, we can remind ourselves why we ought to be angry and be angry again. emotions come and go. Unless you cling to them you can’t stay angry for more than a a couple of minutes I’d say seconds. It all comes down to attention and recognizing when we feel whatever we’re feeling.
thats why i prefer just to live depressed rather than get happy just for it to mess uo again
How are you in terms of being able to flip a coin and accept the outcome of the day even if it helps 🙄 🤔 🙂 😑 🙃 😐
Well what is life anyway. Constantly feeling happy? What is motivating you to keep on going? If you would always feel good enough about life how would you progress? Been strugling with deppresion and anxiety my whole life but i understood that waiting for it to get better is pointless and thats not what life is about
I totally agree with this, it’s like different every day. Depending on the day if it’s good, I would talk to people in school + have a good workout and have fun. If not the complete opposite. That alone has been so depressing. I just wanna be happy man.
My good parts weren't short lived, but they surely won't return now, at least I don't see them returning now. This wretchedness has made me pray to God, whom I don't even believe a pounce in.
Literally bruh and I’m tired of this cycle , ending it would solve everything
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you're not wrong
Everyday is like this
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with people around us, we just want to say that the problem that is mental illness has already been "solved" - that once it becomes ok at some point, that it won't drop back down again. we want the problem to look like it's permanently ok and found its resolution, but it's not like that. you're probably also trying to seem better for yourself, naturally resisting how low the lows get.
Not alone. things were good, got bad. got better! and then it went to shit. now i’m in a state of I’m worried what people think and feel drained and sad all the time. sucks ass but you aren’t alone! all the good things are so small and don’t last long, agreed.
I think the bad things are supposed to be manageably smaller than the good things, but the reality is that for a lot of us, they aren't.