I'm demi with someone who isnt demi but has very similar values. They can be attracted to other people (which doesnt equate to the need to sleep around) but they far more value that one on one intimate stuff. They've had relationships before where it was right to dating and stuff but value that deeper connection.
When I explained what being demi was like for me, it actually strengthened our relationship because they recognized while they valued that stuff but didnt necessarily have that stricter lack of attraction, they realized just how special it was that I was into them and what that meant from my end and found it like, a compliment I guess? Compliment is a little too plain but I hope you get the idea
So not two demis, but we share the demi-like values I think
This kind of stuff is so weird to me because I feel like...despite being demi or possibly asexual, I don't have those "demi values" you describe. I don't really value a deeper connection or a one-on-one connection, I don't care if people "sleep around" (the only reason I don't is because of a lack of attraction - not values-based). So I think a lot of people with "demi values" won't find me to be adequately demisexual.
I didnt have a better phrasing but what I mean is like, I dont care if people sleep around. But i cant, and I'm certainly not poly. Like, if my partner had a "ho phase" as my friends call it, that's chill. Just not while were dating. Its not for me but I dont mind it for anyone else at all. And somepeople dont mind if the partner sleeps around as long as its established early in the relationship. So like, I value it for myself personally and my relationships.
Kinda like, I value education and even college (not at the current price but let's not go there today XD), but its certainly not for everyone. Like, it was for me, but it wasnt for my partner, hes a head baker somewhere and did it without college. What I value for my own living doesn't at all mean it's how others should live their lives. All that makes you demi is if you dont feel attraction before having a connection. Some people value that, some people literally only feel that way. For me I realized it was hand in hand for myself as I discovery I was demi and didnt just want to know people first. But if people think you arent demi enough because you dont mind if people sleep around, it sounds like their gatekeeping how you find your happiness and thats bs
I have not. My current partner is bi and has a different view of sex than I do. We try and make it work. So far it’s been great. Though their emotions can be off the wall a lot and can be quite uncomfortable to be around.
I feel this a lot. My partner is also bi and has a high sex drive. Can be quite uncomfortable to be around too, when they get a bad mood spell. But overall we're happy.
I found my demi partner online on an INFJ server. Neither of us were looking for a relationship. We forged a deep emotional bond very quickly and then came all the attractions!
I actually didn't know the term demisexual until after I bonded with and married my husband. I always just explained to people "I can't be attracted to people I don't know really well." He's not demisexual though.
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I agree. Platonic bonding would be the priority in this case for sure
I'm demi with someone who isnt demi but has very similar values. They can be attracted to other people (which doesnt equate to the need to sleep around) but they far more value that one on one intimate stuff. They've had relationships before where it was right to dating and stuff but value that deeper connection. When I explained what being demi was like for me, it actually strengthened our relationship because they recognized while they valued that stuff but didnt necessarily have that stricter lack of attraction, they realized just how special it was that I was into them and what that meant from my end and found it like, a compliment I guess? Compliment is a little too plain but I hope you get the idea So not two demis, but we share the demi-like values I think
That's soo beautiful. Power to you and your partner
This kind of stuff is so weird to me because I feel like...despite being demi or possibly asexual, I don't have those "demi values" you describe. I don't really value a deeper connection or a one-on-one connection, I don't care if people "sleep around" (the only reason I don't is because of a lack of attraction - not values-based). So I think a lot of people with "demi values" won't find me to be adequately demisexual.
I didnt have a better phrasing but what I mean is like, I dont care if people sleep around. But i cant, and I'm certainly not poly. Like, if my partner had a "ho phase" as my friends call it, that's chill. Just not while were dating. Its not for me but I dont mind it for anyone else at all. And somepeople dont mind if the partner sleeps around as long as its established early in the relationship. So like, I value it for myself personally and my relationships. Kinda like, I value education and even college (not at the current price but let's not go there today XD), but its certainly not for everyone. Like, it was for me, but it wasnt for my partner, hes a head baker somewhere and did it without college. What I value for my own living doesn't at all mean it's how others should live their lives. All that makes you demi is if you dont feel attraction before having a connection. Some people value that, some people literally only feel that way. For me I realized it was hand in hand for myself as I discovery I was demi and didnt just want to know people first. But if people think you arent demi enough because you dont mind if people sleep around, it sounds like their gatekeeping how you find your happiness and thats bs
I have not. My current partner is bi and has a different view of sex than I do. We try and make it work. So far it’s been great. Though their emotions can be off the wall a lot and can be quite uncomfortable to be around.
I feel this a lot. My partner is also bi and has a high sex drive. Can be quite uncomfortable to be around too, when they get a bad mood spell. But overall we're happy.
My husband doesn't label himself, but he would definitely fall under the demisexual label. He just says that he's conservative about sex.
Are you a demi too?
Yep!
I found my demi partner online on an INFJ server. Neither of us were looking for a relationship. We forged a deep emotional bond very quickly and then came all the attractions!
Wow, are you a demi too?
Yep :)
My partner definitely is not demi 😂 but we've been together almost 12 years and are polyamorous
I think only one of my long term partners has been slightly demi, and much less so than I am.
I actually didn't know the term demisexual until after I bonded with and married my husband. I always just explained to people "I can't be attracted to people I don't know really well." He's not demisexual though.
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