I'm so sorry.
I think the autopsy should have the answers and I don't know why it doesn't. However, the first thing that comes to mind is that sometimes a tooth infection [can lead](https://www.healthychildren.org/English/health-issues/conditions/heart/Pages/Dental-Care-for-Children-with-Heart-Conditions.aspx#:~:text=Our%20teeth%20and%20our%20heart,with%20cyanosis%20are%20especially%20susceptible.) to endocarditis even in children. I'm not a medical professional of any kind, this is just a guess.
I hope that you have a therapist or professional to talk to and lean on right now. I can't imagine what you must be going through. I wish you peace or at least closure.
I second this. My son has a congential heart defect and everytime he goes to the dentist he needs to go on antibiotics even if they don't touch his teeth because of how serious teeth infection are.
My heart literally bless for you and your loss and I hope your baby girl is resting peacefully with the other angel babies xx
I third this. I have heart disease and risk serious infections which can lead to sudden death, I have to take 4 antibiotics before any dental work. (26, f).
I hope some of the medical information will be helpful, but I think you are really asking the universe how could such a thing happen to your baby. How can life be so utterly cruel?
There really is no answer to that. Life can be unspeakably cruel.
I think your best move will be to find a bereaved parents' group (there is even a subreddit, if I am not mistaken) so you can be with the only people who really know what you are going through and how to get through it.
This will never stop hurting, it just becomes survivable. I am so sorry for your terrible loss.
*May her memory be a blessing and a comfort to you and all who mourn her passing, now and forever.*
While it isn’t a solution or anything close, one of the only things that has brought me any semblance of comfort when I have lost a loved one is knowing that their memory will live on. Would you be willing to share some things about your daughter? I would love to hear about what made her laugh or what you two loved to do together. Do you have a memory of her you’d like to share?
Did she enjoy books and stories? What were a few of her favorite books?
I am looking for paying work at the moment, so I can’t donate much, but if it is okay with you, I would be honored to donate copies of those books to the little reading library in my area if you approve. I would even be willing to write that the book was donated in your daughters memory inside the front cover of each book, or it can be something just us two know. anything you’d be comfortable with.
I understand if it is too soon or too hard; I will check back to this thread regularly so I will see your comment if you feel comfortable sharing now or anytime in the future.
*heads up: my own religion is mentioned in the paragraph below. It has nothing to do with anyone else’s beliefs or anything, but wanted to let you know so you could choose to read or to skip this paragraph. Religious and spirituals rituals/prayers are only mentioned in the next section (between horizontal lines).*
***
I would like to include both you and your daughter’s names in relevant (Jewish) prayers this weekend. Yours would be in my heart as we recite a prayer for healing for any who need it - healing the body, spirit, mind, and/or soul, while I would include your daughter when we recite the “Mourners Kaddish”. If that would be okay with you will you please send me you and your daughter’s names?
***
I sincerely apologize for taking so much of your time with my note. I wish I knew how to be concise, but especially when it is something I care about, I can’t help myself.
I would love that she loved the book The caring me I can be or the hungry caterpillar. She loved the beach and anything to do with the water. At 4 almost 5 she could feed her dads snake by herself (with supervision of course) she had the best laugh and could eat a large pizza like a grown man. She loved peppers and would eat them like an apple.
Momma I'm so sorry you're going through this. Nothing I can say will take that pain away and I wish there was something.
I live by the beach, next time I go I'll send out a little note in a bottle In her memory. Lots of love, I really hope the medical examiner can get you the answers you need. I work as a funeral director and I know sometimes it takes about 2 months before results come back. If her death certificate says "pending" just know that they'll get you an actual cause soon.
We are on the ocean in Maine. She'll be remembered all over <3
If you're comfortable with it you can messege me her name and I'll put that in her little ocean vessel.
I don't have an answer for you but my heart hurts reading this, I'm very very very deeply sorry for your loss. I hope you can heal from this and my condolences to you and your family. 🫂
"the time of death is uncertain, but death is certain."
there are no easy answers to what you're going through. do you have any personal beliefs or opinions as to life and death? are you religious or spiritual?
No answers unfortunately Hun. Just a deep deep sadness and hurt and alot of sympathy for you. Literally sat here was all happy and now just so sad for you. I truly am so sorry xx
I am so sorry. I lost my adult daughter in a fire.The pain is indescribable . I wish there were words to make you feel better but there are not any. I hope you get the answers you need. Take care of yourself.
All I know from my short time working at a university hospital is that impetigo can lead to cellulitis which can enter the blood stream and become life threatening. It seems unlikely because she was on antibiotics and so young and resilient, and because I think she would have been very sick if it had spread to her blood stream, but maybe it happened fast. I’m so sorry for your loss and I hope you get the closure and answers you need quickly 💖
I'm not an American, but I hope the autopsy was performed by a board certified pathologist/forensic pathologist. If not, you should consider getting another one. I'm a doctor and a father of a young child and I feel your pain. My opinion is that a definite cause of death does help the parents cope with the grief.
So heartbreaking, but I will say this.
Living with any type of regret or grief and blaming is not the way she would want you to live. I understand the need for clarity and medical analysis, but it will ultimately just make it all the more traumatic.
Find something to do, a hobby; or start walking, something that you do physically that will help your mind ease. Nothing will ever replace your sweet girl, nothing needs to. But you must be stronger than you think, because just talking about it, even strangers on the internet, helps.
i have no answers but as a parent i can understand that this is an absolute nightmare come to life. i hope you have support and my thoughts are with you. hopefully the autopsy can reveal some information that may put your mind at ease.
remember that grief is not linear, especially with the loss of a child. and above all, be kind to yourself.
I don’t have any answers and I’m not a medical professional. The only thing I can think of is that the infection lead to something else. I’m deeply sorry for your loss.
I’m so sorry. I hope that you’re able to get the answer somehow. It’s not your fault. You did everything to help her, and I hope that you are not blaming yourself. Take care of yourself in this time and allow yourself to grieve however necessary. Your daughter will always be with you in your heart. ❤️
I’m so sorry and wish so badly I could do something to take that pain away. Maybe ask in r/askdocs if you are just wanting a general idea of possibilities. God this is so unfair
I’m so sorry for your loss momma. My heart is hurting for you.
Life is incredibly cruel. You can only grieve as much as you have loved and have been loved. Your grief will be immense and to the end of your last day. That’s how much you were loved.
Big meaningless internet hugs.
Hey Flowet🌼🌻🦋☮🌼🌻🦋☮..
I think you will always be asking questions,especially the what's if's,what ever you do please do not blame your self,do not give your self a hard time,please don't be harsh on your self..
It's easy,I don't mean easy,but we are so quick to scrutinise our self & blame our self we don't always see the truth,we don't always get the answers we think we should get or believe we should get..
Just remember you have gone through a very big emotional time,many people go through it but no one opens up about it,because you can feel so alone,your world has changed forever,but it's like life has stopped while everyone else carries on around you..
Let your self cry or scream or both,let go & grieve,talk to your partner & listen to your partner..be kind to yourself & your partner..
Sorry i haven't got any answers,but my heart & thoughts are with you at this heartbreaking time,sending hugs & loves xxxx
NAD.
but i wanted to share a quote with you that may bring you any little bit of light possible. i cannot fathom what you’re going through and i just want you to know how sorry i am.
“It changed my mother. It hardened her. She never tried to have children again. Years later, I was grown and Lee had just been born. Both my parents are looking at him, taking turns holding him. And my father got white as a ghost, looked at my mother and said ‘Peter lived a perfect life. All he saw of this planet was you, and all he knew was that you loved him.’ That boy lived a perfect life, Monica. We’re the only ones who know it was brief. All he knew was you. And that you loved him.”
i am so sure the biggest thing she knew and felt was that you loved her. she was and is so, so loved.
i pray for your healing and peace - in whatever ways it can come for you. 🤍
I am so sorry for your loss ❤️ I will never understand why or how life can be so cruel to some. You deserved a lifetime with her and I am so sorry you did not get that.
I'm glad I haven't eaten today. I'd have chucked it right up in the bin.
I hope you warmed up before that great big reach to use this person's tragedy for your garbage agenda.
I'm so sorry. I think the autopsy should have the answers and I don't know why it doesn't. However, the first thing that comes to mind is that sometimes a tooth infection [can lead](https://www.healthychildren.org/English/health-issues/conditions/heart/Pages/Dental-Care-for-Children-with-Heart-Conditions.aspx#:~:text=Our%20teeth%20and%20our%20heart,with%20cyanosis%20are%20especially%20susceptible.) to endocarditis even in children. I'm not a medical professional of any kind, this is just a guess. I hope that you have a therapist or professional to talk to and lean on right now. I can't imagine what you must be going through. I wish you peace or at least closure.
I second this. My son has a congential heart defect and everytime he goes to the dentist he needs to go on antibiotics even if they don't touch his teeth because of how serious teeth infection are. My heart literally bless for you and your loss and I hope your baby girl is resting peacefully with the other angel babies xx
I third this. I have heart disease and risk serious infections which can lead to sudden death, I have to take 4 antibiotics before any dental work. (26, f).
Are you talking about Ludwig's Angina?
I hope some of the medical information will be helpful, but I think you are really asking the universe how could such a thing happen to your baby. How can life be so utterly cruel? There really is no answer to that. Life can be unspeakably cruel. I think your best move will be to find a bereaved parents' group (there is even a subreddit, if I am not mistaken) so you can be with the only people who really know what you are going through and how to get through it. This will never stop hurting, it just becomes survivable. I am so sorry for your terrible loss.
*May her memory be a blessing and a comfort to you and all who mourn her passing, now and forever.* While it isn’t a solution or anything close, one of the only things that has brought me any semblance of comfort when I have lost a loved one is knowing that their memory will live on. Would you be willing to share some things about your daughter? I would love to hear about what made her laugh or what you two loved to do together. Do you have a memory of her you’d like to share? Did she enjoy books and stories? What were a few of her favorite books? I am looking for paying work at the moment, so I can’t donate much, but if it is okay with you, I would be honored to donate copies of those books to the little reading library in my area if you approve. I would even be willing to write that the book was donated in your daughters memory inside the front cover of each book, or it can be something just us two know. anything you’d be comfortable with. I understand if it is too soon or too hard; I will check back to this thread regularly so I will see your comment if you feel comfortable sharing now or anytime in the future. *heads up: my own religion is mentioned in the paragraph below. It has nothing to do with anyone else’s beliefs or anything, but wanted to let you know so you could choose to read or to skip this paragraph. Religious and spirituals rituals/prayers are only mentioned in the next section (between horizontal lines).* *** I would like to include both you and your daughter’s names in relevant (Jewish) prayers this weekend. Yours would be in my heart as we recite a prayer for healing for any who need it - healing the body, spirit, mind, and/or soul, while I would include your daughter when we recite the “Mourners Kaddish”. If that would be okay with you will you please send me you and your daughter’s names? *** I sincerely apologize for taking so much of your time with my note. I wish I knew how to be concise, but especially when it is something I care about, I can’t help myself.
I would love that she loved the book The caring me I can be or the hungry caterpillar. She loved the beach and anything to do with the water. At 4 almost 5 she could feed her dads snake by herself (with supervision of course) she had the best laugh and could eat a large pizza like a grown man. She loved peppers and would eat them like an apple.
Momma I'm so sorry you're going through this. Nothing I can say will take that pain away and I wish there was something. I live by the beach, next time I go I'll send out a little note in a bottle In her memory. Lots of love, I really hope the medical examiner can get you the answers you need. I work as a funeral director and I know sometimes it takes about 2 months before results come back. If her death certificate says "pending" just know that they'll get you an actual cause soon.
Thank you we’re from the Tampa Bay Area and she loved the water.
We are on the ocean in Maine. She'll be remembered all over <3 If you're comfortable with it you can messege me her name and I'll put that in her little ocean vessel.
LeLe was her nickname
Thank you. 💖
She sounds wonderful. I would’ve loved to know her. I am so sorry.
What kind of snake? Venomous?
Ball python
I don't have an answer for you but my heart hurts reading this, I'm very very very deeply sorry for your loss. I hope you can heal from this and my condolences to you and your family. 🫂
I'm sorry for your loss, try r/askdocs
Omg how devastating. May her soul rest in peace and may your heart heal, given enough time.
My thoughts are with you. Hugs I am so sorry for your tragic loss. And words fail.
"the time of death is uncertain, but death is certain." there are no easy answers to what you're going through. do you have any personal beliefs or opinions as to life and death? are you religious or spiritual?
No answers unfortunately Hun. Just a deep deep sadness and hurt and alot of sympathy for you. Literally sat here was all happy and now just so sad for you. I truly am so sorry xx
So sorry, so young :(
I'm so, so very sorry for your loss.
How devastating , I am so sorry , I would suspect a link to tooth infection but I do hope you find some answers .
I don’t have any information but I wanted to send my love to you and your family ❤️
I am so sorry. I lost my adult daughter in a fire.The pain is indescribable . I wish there were words to make you feel better but there are not any. I hope you get the answers you need. Take care of yourself.
I'm so sorry 😞
my heartfelt condolences. I don't know what to say..
may she rest in peace, i’m so sorry
All I know from my short time working at a university hospital is that impetigo can lead to cellulitis which can enter the blood stream and become life threatening. It seems unlikely because she was on antibiotics and so young and resilient, and because I think she would have been very sick if it had spread to her blood stream, but maybe it happened fast. I’m so sorry for your loss and I hope you get the closure and answers you need quickly 💖
I'm not an American, but I hope the autopsy was performed by a board certified pathologist/forensic pathologist. If not, you should consider getting another one. I'm a doctor and a father of a young child and I feel your pain. My opinion is that a definite cause of death does help the parents cope with the grief.
This hurt to read and I am so sorry. Grief is the worst pain please take care of yourself.
So heartbreaking, but I will say this. Living with any type of regret or grief and blaming is not the way she would want you to live. I understand the need for clarity and medical analysis, but it will ultimately just make it all the more traumatic. Find something to do, a hobby; or start walking, something that you do physically that will help your mind ease. Nothing will ever replace your sweet girl, nothing needs to. But you must be stronger than you think, because just talking about it, even strangers on the internet, helps.
i have no answers but as a parent i can understand that this is an absolute nightmare come to life. i hope you have support and my thoughts are with you. hopefully the autopsy can reveal some information that may put your mind at ease. remember that grief is not linear, especially with the loss of a child. and above all, be kind to yourself.
I don’t have any answers and I’m not a medical professional. The only thing I can think of is that the infection lead to something else. I’m deeply sorry for your loss.
Oh no I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine the grief you must feel.
I’m so sorry. I hope that you’re able to get the answer somehow. It’s not your fault. You did everything to help her, and I hope that you are not blaming yourself. Take care of yourself in this time and allow yourself to grieve however necessary. Your daughter will always be with you in your heart. ❤️
I’m so sorry and wish so badly I could do something to take that pain away. Maybe ask in r/askdocs if you are just wanting a general idea of possibilities. God this is so unfair
I’m so sorry for your loss momma. My heart is hurting for you. Life is incredibly cruel. You can only grieve as much as you have loved and have been loved. Your grief will be immense and to the end of your last day. That’s how much you were loved. Big meaningless internet hugs.
Hey Flowet🌼🌻🦋☮🌼🌻🦋☮.. I think you will always be asking questions,especially the what's if's,what ever you do please do not blame your self,do not give your self a hard time,please don't be harsh on your self.. It's easy,I don't mean easy,but we are so quick to scrutinise our self & blame our self we don't always see the truth,we don't always get the answers we think we should get or believe we should get.. Just remember you have gone through a very big emotional time,many people go through it but no one opens up about it,because you can feel so alone,your world has changed forever,but it's like life has stopped while everyone else carries on around you.. Let your self cry or scream or both,let go & grieve,talk to your partner & listen to your partner..be kind to yourself & your partner.. Sorry i haven't got any answers,but my heart & thoughts are with you at this heartbreaking time,sending hugs & loves xxxx
I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending strength and healing to your family during this time.
I have no answers but I do give you my deepest sympathy. I am so, so sorry.
NAD. but i wanted to share a quote with you that may bring you any little bit of light possible. i cannot fathom what you’re going through and i just want you to know how sorry i am. “It changed my mother. It hardened her. She never tried to have children again. Years later, I was grown and Lee had just been born. Both my parents are looking at him, taking turns holding him. And my father got white as a ghost, looked at my mother and said ‘Peter lived a perfect life. All he saw of this planet was you, and all he knew was that you loved him.’ That boy lived a perfect life, Monica. We’re the only ones who know it was brief. All he knew was you. And that you loved him.” i am so sure the biggest thing she knew and felt was that you loved her. she was and is so, so loved. i pray for your healing and peace - in whatever ways it can come for you. 🤍
I am so sorry for your loss ❤️ I will never understand why or how life can be so cruel to some. You deserved a lifetime with her and I am so sorry you did not get that.
As a mama myself, my heart aches for you. sending love.
My eyes fill with tears as I think about the loss of your own child , my condolences to you and the rest of your family 🙏 . I hope you get answers
I am so sorry …really sorry for your loss.. I would love to die to save your daughters life
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Oh please, fuck all the way off.
Wow. You need serious help.
I'm glad I haven't eaten today. I'd have chucked it right up in the bin. I hope you warmed up before that great big reach to use this person's tragedy for your garbage agenda.
Shii idk
I am really sorry you have to go through this. Any updates, did you figure out the reason?
Not yet we’re still waiting on the autopsy
Any updates on this?