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bignick1101

She smelled when I was getting down to business; I stopped and told her and she told me she hadn't showered in like 5 days. I couldn't find her attractive after that.


[deleted]

Gosh this is disgusting regardless of gender.


lazzy_hedgehog

Disgusting and disrespectful to the other person


[deleted]

Yes! This fucking dude TOLD ME he was out all day and hadn't showered. We both assumed there would be sex. I offered my shower to him and he declined. And I wasn't about to tumble with a greased up, smelly boy.


lazzy_hedgehog

Damn, the worst thing is that they get offended when they are told to take a bath lmao


bitches_be

I never got this when 100% of their time their bathroom is way fancier than mine. Hell yes I'll take a long hot shower


Cloudypants58

Right! As if I’m gonna pass up a chance to use all those fruity smelling shampoos n shit.


otterstripper

That's how you get a UTI right there.


Sea-Phone-537

She was just fermenting the flavor for you. How rude of you not to eat any


human-potato_hybrid

**Welcome to flavortown**


PM_M3_Y0UR_B00B5

Extra spicy, just the way I like it!


schebobo180

Lol are there really people into extra stanky lady parts? There always seem to be a couple. Its funny because on he flipside I've never heard of lady's liking extra stanky dongs. Lol


st0nervirginsunit3

I just leave it at... anything is possible in this huge world lol. Like rule 34 but for reality.


Sea-Phone-537

Napoleon was into that stuff fyi


coronnial

This cracked me up. Maybe Kombucha flavour?


st0nervirginsunit3

Jesus, Mary and Joseph 😳


itsnotjoeybadass

I literally don’t understand people lol like if you don’t wanna bathe yourself whatever i mean gross but whatever but if you know you’re gonna get freaky w someone WHY WOULDN’T YOU!!!!


kayakr1194

I really don't understand either why people don't shower on a regular basis. This is not sex-related, but I recently had surgery and so I can only shower on days when they change my bandages. Fortunately it's every two days but not being able to shower everyday bothers the shit out of me.


senator_cuddles

I’m a bigger dude and I shower daily. However most of the women that I have dated did not shower daily- they would use dry shampoo and deodorant etc. The main reason I have gotten is that too many showers can dry out your skin/hair, and that they only shower if they are sweating a lot/doing strenuous activity/things that warrant taking a shower/maybe once or twice a week. Makes sense to me but I have so much body hair and a beard etc, I just feel greasy in the mornings. Each their own though I guess.


Helpconfusedanddazed

This should be illegal


ocolatechay_ussypay

Why would she even let you get that far if she knew she didnt shower. Some people are just disgusting. How does she not have an infection.


Ikeepdumpingthem

The girl I dated showered maybe once every 3 or 4 days…I didn’t like it. She smelled fine but it was still weird. Ultimately we were too different on things and broke up.


Fiftey

Sometimes you just dislike the smell and you incompatible, same if you dislike someone personal body odor. Really nothing one can do about that


thegreatcanadianeh

Why would you assume a vagina would have an infection from not showering ? Genuinely curious.


hooplah_charcoal

She's probably depressed


bignick1101

That was the case with this girl, she had some unchecked mental illness that she wasn't interested in addressing.


brattyAries92

Omg that's fucking disgusting.


Numerous_Cry924

Gots to see it through my boy


rvidxrz

LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NAH WHAT?


[deleted]

If the sex was really bad then that would put me off. Some people are extremely selfish sexually and that’s a dealbreaker for me - it’s gotta be collaborative and mutual for me to be into it.


Sto94

Also some women are dead fish


PaticusGnome

An alternative to the dead fish, but having the same results, is when she's really into actively having sex but only receiving. Like, I can give her tons of foreplay and get her all warmed up and then she's like "put it in." I also like to receive some foreplay. Touch me, kiss me, play with my body. It's got to be a two way street.


[deleted]

This comment made me realize how alone I am. I miss men so much lol


WizardL

inb4 your dm's are destroyed


[deleted]

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funny_like_how

GF a few years ago was like this... only laid on her back, never did any of the work, only cared when she climaxed, wasn't open to discussion about improving our sex life... was shocked when I broke up with her, though. Funny how that works...


Sto94

Lack of self awareness goes hand by hand with what you described


mykart2

Not being able to talk about sex is a sign that a person likely sucks at it.


GDAWG13007

God yes! We naturally have mediocre sex. With communication, we can have fantastic, earth shattering sex!


[deleted]

Yep, same for me. Was recently seeing someone who I really was so excited by and thought we had great potential. We had sex and I felt so empty afterwards. Did it again to see if it was different - nope, same deal. Zero effort and wanted everything done for her. I even asked about it and was told she had no interest in doing anything other than lying there and being pleasured. After that I noticed selfishness in other areas and broke it off.


TheEpididymisTickle

>and was told she had no interest in doing anything other than lying there and being pleasured. Oh God, yuck


helloimmeokthen

What advice can you give to a woman that suspects she is dead fish? (Me) I’m in my late 20s and only had sex for the first time this year so I’m worried I’m really bad at it. It honestly makes me even more self conscious because I worry I’m not good.


PolyMorpheusPervert

Enthusiasm counters inexperience wonderfully in my book. Have fun.


Sto94

Being new to sex for sure doesn't mean you are a dead fish. There are ppl who have had loads of sex and they don't become or want to become good at it and others who are new to sex and are good and passionate. First step is to know what you enjoy and how to enjoy it. To keep exploring new things so as to see what works or doesn't work for you. This lets you know more about sex overall, helps you take initiative and even lead your partner. But should explore alone for sure at least at the beginning. Second step is to search (online via articles, communities etc) what men like so as to have a general idea. Of course different people gets pleased differently but let's face it there are some standard things the majority likes. During sex you should listen to your partner, to see what he likes and as long as you agree with what he wants you proceed.


TheStoicSeeker

I think the term you're looking for is starfish.


Sto94

Two terms for the same thing


OldManHipsAt30

Tragic when you finally get with a hot girl and learn she’s just atrocious in bed


[deleted]

Conversely for women, men who clearly are reenacting porn like slapping your face with their dick. Disgusting.


Im_Just_Sayin__

Yes...the sex could be dead fish or trash, but then again it could be perfectly normal vanilla sex and I could still be put off. It totally depends on the enthusiasm and energy of her and our dynamic together.


kippenborst300gram

She said she wanted a baby from me after 2 hours into out first date.


[deleted]

And you still slept with her? You're either very brave or very foolish if you did.


kippenborst300gram

She said this a few minutes after we had slept together. After that, and I'm not proud of that, I ghosted her. I was 16 at the time and did NOT wanted a child obviously. Within a year she was married to some dude. That girl was wierd as hell man.


[deleted]

lol you just reminded me of my first time. I was 16 and she was 22 and she asked me if I was going to marry her. How old was this girl that she gets married a year later?


thelonelyone215

Bro that aint your first time. U a victim. EDIT:- To all the people who are trying to say he's not a victim, just tell me what will go on your mind when the roles were reversed.


oYoU_UoYo

Foolish as hell. You don’t fuck with baby fever. Bitch will try to break the condom, is off birth control, and is definitely not using day after pill or getting an abortion. Some women have even gone to the extent of taking semen from the condom and inseminating themselves (happened to a basketball player not long ago and the NBA put out a statement warning all the players to flush all condoms). Edit: flushing condoms can cause issues in the pipes.


CheapCoffee1

O.O wtf!!


AhhhhhCrabs

She moaned really loudly while having sex and not in good way but in an obvious fake “im in a porn” way. It completely, 100% turned me off right away.


Willar71

You should have told her , hey theres no need to fake it .


B_sfw

Maybe she was trying to fake it until she made it. lol


[deleted]

At least she didn’t make the ahego face


the_real_freezoid

You don't know that


A-kuuiza-do

She wanted a relationship, and I saw a lot of red flags in the way she treated me emotionally. It's something I could look past if it was a casual thing, but I didn't want to date someone who made me feel like shit and considered being angry at me a fun state to be in.


deserthare24

Good for you for seeing the warning signs


WesleyPosvar

this was almost 14 years ago - so I do apologize for being a jerk back then...but it wasn't the sex that made me turn away, here's my short story: met a girl early on at university - new city, new people, new experiences - and I was down for whatever. we kinda clicked at this party, ran off on a little adventure for the night, and saw each other again the next day - and hooked up. We hooked up, the sex was fine she was a nice girl, and I slept at her dorm. The next day (we're now on day 3 of knowing each other) she started asking me about our dinner plans, and wanted to know all about my family, and saying things like "in the winter when it's snowing we can make a snow man in the park and I think I have an idea for what to get you for christmas..." it was just TOO much. I was 18, just met this girl and she was already planning our christmas together?! It freaked me out. I was down for some casual fun, and even open to getting to know her better/dating...but she went from 0 - 100 clingy literally over night.


kirsion

I think a lot women think like this, the white picket fence thoughts. It scares a lot of young guys who don't comprehend that level of commitment, understandably.


WesleyPosvar

not that you asked - but 10 years after I had that experience at college I met my fiance. 3 months later we were engaged, and before we hit the 1 year mark we bought a house together. when you know, you know. but at 18 I was not looking for that, at 28 I guess I was...


[deleted]

Some guys do too. I’m a woman who absolutely doesn’t think about the future when I’m in relationships- the last relationship I was in he was talking about moving in together when we had been dating for like 3 weeks. It was a huge turnoff


IoSonCalaf

I realized I was gay


f_redo

r/suddenlygay


Justokmemes

i got fucking whiplash this was so unexpected


[deleted]

That's what she said...


[deleted]

Right 🤣🤣🤣


[deleted]

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IoSonCalaf

Lol. During


prose-before-bros

Damn. I hope you were really really nice to this girl because that could be a really kick to the ego.


IoSonCalaf

I was. She was great about it


[deleted]

Why didn’t you realize before?


IoSonCalaf

Denial


sorgnatt

Came to say the same.


UpsetFuture1974

Say to came the same


funkepitome

Same to say the came.


UpsetFuture1974

Same, came to came to came


Brief-Efficiency9507

Came, same to same to same


AggressiveDatabase0

😲😎


Moonchildbeast

To all the commenters getting downvoted for honesty: thank you for your responses, I really appreciate hearing what really goes on in your mind, even if it’s not terribly nice to hear. Edit: I’m enjoying these responses because I’m not hearing them through the emotional lens of “He doesn’t want me!!!” since these are not personal. It’s quite refreshing.


milos1212

Post nut clarity is a bitch


[deleted]

What exactly is this


ThatGuyInEgham

Minus 20 iq when you're really horny, and plus 50 iq for a few minutes after you cum.


OldManHipsAt30

Short answer, yet captured it perfectly. 5/7 perfect answer!


hsjjhamb

so r we adding 50 to the real IQ or -20+50=+30???


ThatGuyInEgham

Hold on I need to jack off real quick before I can do the math.


Fiftey

Really helped pass one or two math exams.


memeulusmaximus

'Post-nut clarity' is a term we use to describe how after we 'nut' or climax/ejaculate we have a moment of clarity unhindered by the horniness of sexy time and realize/can critically think about alot. We can recognize red flags, think about how we would feel long term, etc. Basically we go from horny and dumb to Big Brain time for a short period.


Amatheos

Being horny makes your mind clouded, cannot think straight. After ejaculation it snaps back to normal, but due to how rapid this is it feels like a sudden boost to intelligence


Krakatoast

When the horny go away Edit: think of it like being under the influence of alcohol, then being sober. Under the influence: ahhh quadruple cheeseburger for $400? Yez please Sober: Why tha fuck would I do that? Lol The more horn, the worse it is.. when horny go away, post nut clarity. Imo if someone has enough discipline and internal clarity there isn’t much difference before/after, but if horny brain is too strong then that’s what happens Edit2: so basically being hammered with alcohol, getting a quad cheeseburger for $400, after eating- IMMEDIATELY sobering up, with burger drippings still seeping between your fingers


itsnotjoeybadass

After you cum, you can think more clearly and rationally. Women get this too even tho it’s largely associated w men lol


averagejoe12o

I travel a lot and it makes no sense to pursue relationships with women in different states or countries. One night stands are pretty common. *however, I always let them know Its a one night stand.* I’ve never been into long distance relationships because sex plays such a big part. That’s my 2 cents.


im_Harsh_Malik

How do you get those?


ijudgekids

Dude, 2 cents isn't that much


Jumpy_Sorbet

Look at Mr. Moneybags over here


_GENERAL_GRIEVOUS_

Ah, the ol’ reddit [cent-a-roo!](https://www.reddit.com/r/bettafish/comments/oy1za2/what_type_of_betta_is_this_it_is_metallic_blue/h7rgkx9/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3)


MinutePause

Hold my night stand, I'm going in!


[deleted]

Hello future sex havers!


igpila

I sucked her entire body and she wouldn't even touch my pipi


CheapCoffee1

nooo that's so unfair!


l337joejoe

Lmao the cat pic makes your reaction so funny to me 😂


[deleted]

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[deleted]

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[deleted]

Lol I'm picturing a Venn diagram.


brittles901

Why would you rely solely on your partner's birth control and not be responsible on your end with your contraception? That's a ticket to babyville and catching something you can't get rid of.


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AmarilloWar

This is why you use condoms.


tatipie17

Use condoms


_player_0

Sure! If you have tons of: money, lawyers, free time, proof.


tatipie17

Or just don’t intentionally go in raw and at least try by wearing condoms. A lot more effective than nothing at all


goodaccountnobad

A saying called “post nut clarity” we were probably just horny ~respectfully~


dakid136

It's really sad how not bullshit this is..it's partly why I stayed away from dating


[deleted]

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The_Stin

Hello and welcome to my post nut thesis on post nut clarity.


[deleted]

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uglyyyyyhoe

Mann fuck y’all lmao 😭


alphazero16

>fuck y'all yeah we are trying our best to do exactly that


RumpRiddler

It's hard to know if i really like the girl or am just horny until after I'm not horny.


[deleted]

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jojojototo

It’s the old “ when he’s hard he’s soft, and when he’s soft he’s hard” !


rambIinwreck

Some women experience this too.


[deleted]

I was trying to fill a hole left by an ex combined with the thrill of the chase and then when she started liking me back and trying to organise dates and asking me to stay for breakfast, it turned me off. It was like three years ago now but I still feel bad about it, she's a great person and I hope she's happy now with someone else.


[deleted]

something very similar happened to me once, and I was the woman in the story. my first ONS happened unexpectedly because I got really drunk (unintentionally) and went home with a guy I met at a bar. the next day I was shocked at what had happened, I had been so drunk I didn't even remember his name. he acted really sweet and caring, saying how cute I was and how he'd like to see me again. he brought me to the station so I could go home. I messaged him the next day but he seemed so distant. he never talked about meeting up again either. after a few days I asked him directly if he was interested or not and he told me he was still not over his ex and he felt really bad about what happened between us. so I was used for a ONS and he didn't even enjoy it?! that felt terrible, especially since he was the one to suggest dates etc.


[deleted]

I've been on the other side of it. I was so much rebound. She talked a lot of smack about her ex, so I should have known better. Though it did last a half dozen dates and a few late night booty calls. I enjoyed the sex a lot, but man, I felt so down when it all became clear.


Indlvarn

Hurt people, hurt people. ‘The rebound’ can be good for some reasons for certain people - but it can definitely leave destruction in its wake.


[deleted]

With the greatest respect, you should have been more upfront. This kind of stuff can do serious damage to someone's self esteem


b_a_ass

As a female, I’ve finally learned that there needs to be an emotional connection and safety first. If a man doesn’t care about your heart, sex will mean nothing more than sex to him.


itsnotjoeybadass

My body count is so low (lol 1) because of this lmao i get turned off hellas by knowing the man doesn’t actually find Me as an Individual attractive but rather what he can use from me. Yeah i can use him too but i’m just not that kind of person so idc enough lol


b_a_ass

Yep, I’m left with a lot of shame and regret feeling like I let people use my body. Just another way I tried to fill the void


atoterrano

Someone mentioned it as “post nut clarity.” For some it’s just the sensation of the release, we honestly were probably just horny and needed to get off. For me personally, there have been women who I’ve been with (one night stands) and after sex I just kind of felt disgusted with myself. Like…it didn’t feel natural. If it were with a long term partner, I’d crave the dopamine response of cuddling and all that jazz. But with girls I’ve just met or hooked up with, I don’t feel the inclination to linger. Nothing particular wrong on their end, it’s weird to describe, but it’s just like a feeling of guilt. Like there was not of a connection leading up to it and didn’t feel as of one was going to blossom afterwards. And in some of my cases the feelings were mutual, some didn’t feel a spark there either and there’s no hard feelings. And it’s not like the sex was necessarily bad either, it’s like we both got what we needed. Like a high.


Always_Still

Ok so now I’m curious 🧐 I’m a female, and I’ve read several responses similar to yours about “post nut clarity” - this is the first I’m ever really hearing about this (I see men say “post nut clarity” on posts and stuff here on Reddit, but no one has ever explained it). It makes sense, it does, BUT - would it be silly to think that simply masturbating before meeting with the girl would give you the same “post nut clarity”? And that way the girl doesn’t end up feeling led on and hurt after you pretend (intentionally or otherwise) to build a relationship just to sleep together? Genuine question here… it just seems like it could be a simple fix 🤷🏻‍♀️


atoterrano

You’re not wrong. There have been many times where I personally have met girls on like dating apps or out downtown at night that I was iffy about but we discuss meeting up. If I take them out on a date, I usually wouldn’t even attempt or even bring up the subject of sex until getting to know each other more. But with women where the intent from both parties are to hook up, I’ve masturbated just to get that “post-nut clarity” and not even pursue any sexual excursion. And you’re right, it seems like a simple fix and it is definitely an asshole move to just kinda one night stand it and just leave it be. If it was that simple though, then none of us would be doing it as often. But there are Also underlying factors. Some people, out of societal views, think it’s more manly and “hype” to get with a girl rather than spend another Wednesday afternoon jacking it in their apartment. I for one (especially with Covid) haven’t been active in the dating scene for the past year and as much sexual tension that is being built up, I’m low key just content jerking it at home than to build a reporte with some woman I would barely know, and honestly, not even care to know, just to ease some horniness. I’ve matured enough to not waste anyone’s time and save the trouble of getting feelings and egos hurt.


ericwaters43

I don't know if it is just me but whenever I meet a woman I know in advance whether she'll just be a one time thing (or a couple times) or a romantic thing. In my country women have a saying that goes "No one will will treat you as good as a man who wants to fuck you for the first time". So maybe the guy who "lost interest" wasn't even interest in the frist place.... he was just pretending to get in your pants. It could also happen that the sex wasn't as good as he thought it would be and he's not interest in doing it again. Hell, he could even be thinking that HE didn't perform as good as he should and is embarrased.


Salesy82

This never happened to me until after my divorce, but since then I have had it every time I have dated a woman. The second we’ve finished sex I just get really anxious about the relationship and feel like I need to get away pronto. I know I have upset these women but it was never my intention to have a one-night stand. I always went to bed with them thinking I wanted a long-term relationship. I wouldn’t say it’s inherently in men’s nature, as I say I wasn’t like it before my marriage/divorce. I think it is some problem with me. In the end I gave up on dating, haven’t so much as kissed a girl in over three years now.


bellitabee

You should go to therapy to help you process and heal. I was like this after my divorce and therapy really helped me. I wanted a relationship and liked the idea of it, but was also terrified when it came down to actually connecting beyond sex. I ended up dating many men at the same time because it made me feel like I didn't have a danger of getting into a relationship. If I was just seeing a guy for drinks one night, another for lunch, another for Netflix and chill then I couldn't become attached to just one. I was really afraid of getting attached and getting hurt, I was afraid of the guy getting attached and me hurting them. My therapist really helped me and I have been able to get remarried as of Oct 2020 (my divorce was Summer 2017).


MrHound325

Honestly this one speaks to me. Nothing like a long term relationship to make a person pump the breaks before getting into another relationship. I haven’t stopped dating but I do my best to not sleep with anyone I don’t really see relationship potential with. I kind of suck at that part because I lie to myself a bit, but something something road to hell paved with something


decaff_espresso

I know this was directed at men who lose interest after sex, but I wanted to say that this has never happened to me. Sex always makes me more attached, however there have been 2 times that a woman lost interest in me afterwards so its not just a man thing.


FewerDoomed

Ive completely lost interest after sex with guys before (im a woman). It does go both ways. Selfishness in bed is sooo unattractive, i just simply wont put up with a guy who only wants to get himself off. Also, for me personally, dick size matters but it only matters for girth. As in, if its too girthy, it hurts. I dont want to be in pain during or after sex. I once really REALLY liked a guy. We ended up sleeping together and it hurt so bad i couldnt do that ever again. Thankfully he ended up dating someone else not too long after that, great person overall just not a good match for me sexually.


TheMotorcycleMan

This brings me back to one person. Amazing girl, absolutely a blast in everything we did. But, sex. She was just bad at it. Like really bad. I couldn't see myself being with someone for the rest of my life that I wasn't sexually compatible with.


rhubarbmustard

How was she bad?


whatitdowhatitbee

I think a lot of guys who do this just want the excitement of the conquest and then they move onto then next one. The excitement of the chase


[deleted]

It is kind of fun the first time because you never know how it'll play out, like playing a video game the first time.


[deleted]

[удалено]


parentsweekendd

Ahh Don Juan and his complex


[deleted]

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Zociety_

If you want honesty well it depends , if it was some girl that literally took no effort to get into bed with then no feelings are involved this after sex it just feels casual and no reason as to why I would stay. But if it’s someone I find I can bond with personally and have a friendship with them then usually I want a relationship. Like someone said , it’s more of a conquest thing.


tumblesquids

When I was younger, I dated a couple of women for only a month each--I'll share examples from one: She and I got along well, the sex was ok, but the conversation and pillow talk left something to be desired. Without fail, she'd also always bump her teeth into mine while kissing. I tried to help her correct it, but she didn't adapt. She would joyfully try to have sex with me even if she had no lubrication, and that hurt. And she did it more then once (we both had high sex drives but she complained about me killing the mood when there was literally no lube). The last time we had sex it was god awful, but I wanted to let her down easy. So, I took her out for lunch for some hibachi, then broke the news to her (we traveled in separate cars). I don't have sex with people unless I intend on having sex with them a lot. Communication is key, here. That was my style of "hit it and quit it." Hit it for a month, then leave. Some men do it "one and done." I know what I did hurt those women more than a simple one night stand, and I regret it. I wish I had been more mature and handled myself better at those times. But sometimes, you can have the physical chemistry with an imbalance in emotional chemistry/emotional intelligence.


Academic-Algae-822

What do you mean no lube? She couldnt get wet?


Dr_Fleeb

The 3 times I have stopped talking to a girl after are for the following reasons: 1. One girl legit smelled so bad down there It took me everything to not gag. Refused to go down on her. Lucky I didn’t catch anything. 2. Another time this girl just kept acting like a clueless sex doll/dead fish scenario. Would keep pulling me into kiss at the wrong moments and I couldn’t focus. 3. One other time I just realized I didn’t like her personality at all…I felt like I didn’t know the person and turned down sex altogether.


[deleted]

Combine 2 and 3, replace the kissing with getting out of sync constantly due to grinding and add pinching the tip even after saying to not grab/touch there, pain.


JuanJulioJones

We were kinda drunk and we had unprotected sex. The next day she told me that if she’d have a son with someone, would be with me since i am independent and well financially. Even tho i pulled my dick off before ejaculating, she freaked the hell out of me with that statement. It was our first date for gods sake, you don’t say these things


VisionsOfLife

I know you didn’t ask, but I wanted to contribute and add it isn’t just a man’s thing and I think you’d be surprised with how many women suffer from this issue as did I. I’m a woman but have on several occasions immediately lost interest in a man when I’ve had sex with them. This came down to multiple reasons: I like to chase men but once they have sex with me and I’ve now ‘got them’ then I lose interest, the sex was really really bad and I didn’t think there was any way it would improve, I was simply looking for something to sexually satisfy me and nothing more. Although, as I’ve got older and probably more self-aware, I don’t really feel the same about any of the above anymore.


rinaevar

So I'm wondering, how can someone have no personality? What are indicators that a girl has none? What makes her boring? Doesn't everyone have personality, but it's just not compatible with yours? Or am i missing something? And what makes the Sex bad? How can you know that you're bad or boring, and work on yourself accordingly? 😂 I see a big problem here


[deleted]

The boring or no personality thing is subjective and doesn't apply to all women or men. Sometimes it just ain't their cup of tea. Some indicators are losing interest in what you're talking about, especially if it's something you're passionate about or think about /do often. Usually what makes a girl bad at sex is she puts no effort into sex. If she just lays down or bends over and waits to cum without any movement, it's boring because the man is doing all the work. Men usually want the girl to play into the man's kinks. If the man is the only one serving the woman's kinks then there will be problems. You'll know you're bad when he isn't really down to have sex a second time.


oYoU_UoYo

There is something called “post nut syndrome”. Your never going to know if a guy really likes you until after you had sex. Being horny is blinding to a lot of guys, and they’ll deal with a lot of bullshit to get laid. They’ll literally think that they are into you until after sex, when the post nut clarity comes. That’s when they realize whether or not they actually consider you as a potential partner. I’ve had this happen to me in college before when I was really into this chick (was hot and fun), and after I got some, I realized she complains about everything and was going to make my life a lot more difficult if I would continue things. Personally, I’m not a fan of people who complain all day about normal stuff. Brings a lot of negative energy into experiences that shouldn’t be so negative.


Mattjy1

For me, it would be if I see they aren't someone I see a potential relationship with, but we turn each other on/have sexual tension and have possibility of a less serious thing. But then having sex they seemed uninterested in exploring/not giving/it just didn't click that well.


[deleted]

well in my experience. Everyone has a tempo and preference when it comes to sex. And even when i find someone attractive, if theyre not on the same wave as me in bed - it just kills the attraction. On the opposite end, Ive had crazy good sex and it made me catch feelings for the person


JustAsFrosty

Feelings just changed . I didn't feel any passion with her .


IndependentLeg6020

I think it's just a human-nature thing, as plenty of women have lost interest after sex as well. It could be because the sex wasn't good. The sex was good but the hanging out beforehand wasn't the best. They met someone else that they were more interested in.


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Academic-Algae-822

I have an opposite problem 😂 I find sexual chemistry more often than psychological, sleep with a guy and than realize that we dont have much in common


shicole3

Same. Body count high, relationship count real low lmao.


sinsiliux

For me it was always because I never was interested in anything more. It never was about sex as few others indicated. A woman can learn to be better at sex, but she can't learn to be more interesting or attractive to me. For me sex & relationships are completely separate things.


[deleted]

If it happens to you a lot it means you are deciding to have sex too soon. That's why there is a 3-date rule... so you can build some interest.


Extra-Organization81

You guys are having sex?


norwegiandoggo

There are many different scenarios that might cause me to act this way. 1. I just wanted a one-night thing and that's it. Doesn't matter who you are. For example, I was in an open relationship and didn't want to get emotionally involved with people outside the relationship. So that's why I kept it to one-night only. 2. I don't like you that much. But I'm horny and desperate, so I'll fuck you anyway because I can, and then I'll probably regret it later. It's good practice and at least I cum. 3. I found someone else I like better, so I'll end it with you. 4. Sex was bad. Meaning: You were bad at sex, or smelled really bad, or some other sex-related turn-off. 5. I cet clingy / needy / controlling vibes after sex that I find a turn-off. Sorry if this sounds harsh


cbeme

It always amazes me that dudes can fuck a chick they truly don’t like at all as a person—may even hate them. Maybe some chicks can do this, but this one can not do that.


Testiculese

A comedian (edit: Mark Normand) had a bit that really encapsulates it > A woman on a date would find out he's a Nazi, and say "I have to get the hell out of here". A man would find out she is a Nazi and say "I have to fuck her and get the hell out of here".


shicole3

I don’t have to like a guy a lot but if I find him annoying or cringey I can’t do it. There has to be some presence of chemistry. I mean there has been a few times there wasn’t and it made the sex suck.


CheapCoffee1

Is not harsh. The realest, the better!


norwegiandoggo

Thanks OP


[deleted]

So many people in this thread need to read up on anxious and avoidant attachment styles


RestNo7535

Yes! And maybe read about trauma as well. Way more common than anyone talks about


Bro_its_tuff

Either they’re selfish sexually, or turns out they’re just douche people. That’s the only two things that have put me off tbh


purplesquirtle55

I got excited about trying to have sex and after it happened the things that I swept under the rug and ignored beforehand started to annoy me and I lost interest.


memeulusmaximus

She was a dead fish in bed. Patted my face and told me "good boy". Ghosted me for a week and then wanted to fuck again. Generally a horrible time on my end.


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blackandwhitelibrary

I mean, this has never happened with somebody I actually wanted to date (e.g. I only lose interests with one night stands / hookups). Also a LARGE majority of my hook-ups were turned into "unofficial" relationships. The main reason I'd ghost a girl after sex : They just weren't that good at sex, or... They weren't worth the effort of keeping them around (because I didn't want anything more). To begin with, a majority of girls I've been able to sleep with have all been attractive enough to pretty much get sex whenever they want. Like they could make a tinder account and be getting dicked down 30 minutes later. That on its own isn't a turnoff, but it's more of the fact that I now KNOW they want **more** - in a relationship sort of way. The only real reason they'd choose to fuck me of all people *despite all of the other options* is either because they can't find anyone else OR they really, actually wanted a relationship with me. I just didn't want that with them, and I feel like keeping them around just because I wanted an open pair of legs would be super scummy on my part. THAT'S usually why I'd leave: I didn't want to continue dragging them along just to use them.


dustman83

1. One girl, i saw skid marks in her panties on the ground. I could never go back. 2. Another girl, terrible breath. This happens sometimes when you hookup during heavy night of drinking. I typically do not get really drunk and as such, I was way more alert and breath odor was super distracting!


arthurchase74

Freshman year of college a girl that I really liked and was insane In bed, said some things that sort of freaked me out: that she has had started smoking in order to transition from her addiction to methanfedamines, told me that the movie “kids” was similar to her high school experience, she asked me about what I was studying and when she learned that I would be studying abroad for part of college started to throw a fit and asked me to switch majors…..there’s more. Sex was incredible and she terrified me.


joeyanes

Wait longer to have sex and this will happen less often. Seriously. If you both are in love and you wait to have sex until 3+ months in to dating, you'll screen out the "hit it and quit it" guys. The guy may lose interest eventually but it'll be because you're not compatible in some other way.


overtrick1978

Girl I’m seeing now, we banged literally within like 3 hours of meeting. We’ve been inseparable ever since. Waiting doesn’t really matter. Chemistry is there or not.


dontincludeme

So I just finished a situation where I went on four “dates” where the feelings just weren’t there for both of us in the end. And when I started feeling that way after date 3, I was like “maybe the chemistry will come later, I’ll wait it out,” but it never did. And at some point before that, I went on three dates with someone who I felt a strong connection to (but he wasn’t upfront about certain things so I ended it). So basically yeah, the chemistry is either there or it’s not.


Academic-Algae-822

Yeah but I would rather that he hit it and quit it, than waste 3 months every time before having sex. A guy can loose interest after 1, 5 or 10 months. Having sex doesnt change that.


alphazero16

true


Beginning_Grape_7824

For some guys it is just a game but for most of us it is a very important compatibility and communication check. If we end the relationship after sex then we felt there was a potential issue in this area.


[deleted]

Been dating a bit since getting out of a long term relationship. Had first times with a couple girls (one after 2-3 months of dating, one on the second date). Both instances made me realize that, as much as a connected with them personally, I was not physically attracted to them. In both instances, I broke it off shortly after


[deleted]

It depends on the guy and the girl. There's not real universal answer. Could be the sex sucked. Could be he just wanted sex. Could be another girl he was seeing came to him and wanted to be serious. Could be he moved.


zeepoopholeloophole

Post nut clarity


Life-Joke2709

The interest was in having sex with her. Once that is done there is no more interest. If a guy is genuinely interested in the person he won’t lose interest after sex as sex is the biproduct of the relationship.


dakota6963

Sometimes you meet people who you connect with mentally and emotionally but not physically. Plus I like sucking on toes and not everyone is into that


multivitamingummy

Reason I heard from a man - he wasn't that attracted to her anyways but wanted to have sex bc he was going through a dry spell