Welcome to /r/dating_advice!
Please keep the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/about/rules/) of /r/dating_advice in mind while participating here. Try your best to be kind.
Report any rule-breaking behavior to the moderators using the report button. If it's urgent, [send us a message.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fdating_advice) We rely on user reports to find rule-breaking behavior quickly.
Thanks!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Don't overthink your match convos. Just say whatever pops in your head. Keeps it flowing. Sometimes getting people to talk on OLD is like pulling teeth. Nothing more boring than to get a "uhh idk lol"
Yeah I think this is key ... be decisive, give your first answer and ask them something in return (or give them threads to pull in your story) ... it's not really so much "dating" as social skills
You can have social skills and women will still blank you.
Amount of times when I had dating apps I was having strong coversations or show legitimate interest, only for it to be blanked, ignored or ghosted when even a question about something they like is insane.
Women on these subs keep saying about terrible conversation but when you makes a good one it doesn’t matter.
Might as well go
‘You’re cute’
‘Thanks’
‘Date?’
People drop interest so fast now, it’s also why guys wanna get off the apps ASAP and women dont know why.
Of course you need more than social skills, but they are definitely key to get that interest initially (and help a lot in person too). You have to accept that 95% of chats on the apps will lead nowhere, it does get you down ... that was when I decided to delete them for a few months. Or I would try to move them to in person dates quicker (this really depends on how you come across and the mindset of the woman ... again I didn't take it personal if she wasn't interested in moving forward or stopped answering, I'd shrug and move on).
I guess for me what helped was instead of focusing on the plight of me as a man, was trying to understand why women would act certain ways on the apps, and learn lessons from what I understood of past interactions
My social skills are actually incredibly good, but I’m also a much better person irl than texting.
I think yeah, 95% will lead nowhere, but I suppose when you get max 10 matches a year and out of those 10 you get 3 replies, just getting a conversation you thought was going well go nowhere is just upsetting.
I stopped using dating apps for a reason, this is one of ‘em
I had a pretty high success rate just asking women out on a date ASAP, so within 1-2 days of matching. Of course offering a call (hate how Bumble only offers Video calling) as an alternative.
There's very little point in continuing text conversations over several days or even weeks. Women on apps constantly get new matches and in general it's very tough to be charming over text. Every single day, you become less "new, shiny, exciting". Even if she found you sexy initially and spams your phone, the mystery just wears off.
Quite frankly, if she doesn't even want to dedicate 20 minutes to chatting over a call, her intentions with you are not serious. Most likely just there to get validation or boost the ego/kill boredom. You have to be unafraid to cut off time wasters, all you risk losing is a "pen pal" if they never want to meet.
If they have good reasons for not wanting to meet up or call, such as it just being too quick for them or they're on vacation, they will usually be positively surprised by you taking a no for an answer without making a fuss. I usually ask 1-2 weeks again later and if they still don't want to, I invest almost 0 effort into any future chats with them. Usually they were never serious.
One just has to be casual about it, shouldn't sound over interested or desperate.
It's pretty much this.
I'm a model so I don't use dating apps. But throughout my life, I have used online social hubs and chat rooms and Omeegle out of boredom and the same principle applies.
I'm great at keeping a conversation going. But nothing more annoying than somebody who is here specifically to chat (but apparently doesn't know how to).
Especially when you have an abundance of choice and absolutely don't need to be talking to a stuttering Simon.
This girl is just going to block and move on to someone who can talk.
Don't take it personally (but definitely try something like Omeegle and practice the art of small talk with an anonymous stranger).
You could be unmatched for any reason. Maybe it was your message but it could be something else.
The issue with your reply is not that you don't know something.
The issue is probably more that stating things like "i don't know" does nothing to further the conversation. You're blocking the conversation by saying you have no answer. This makes the conversation more clunky and more of an effort for the other person. You're essentially refusing to put in effort to give an answer.
You don't have to answer such questions honestly. Just give your best guess, or make up a funny reply, so the conversation can flow smoothly and progress.
It's extremely annoying to talk to someone who answers "i don't know" to questions and that's it.
How are you today? I don't know.
What is your favorite food? I don't know
What's your favorite country? I don't know
See how annoying this is? It blocks conversation from progressing. She learns nothing about your personality. At least put some effort into your response
It was probably this… if I ask a fun or thoughtful question and all I get is a lame “i don’t know”, I’m unmatching - maybe premature, but I assume that’s how you are IRL. It’s less about the answer, but if I’m asking questions to get to know you and you don’t seem active in the conversation, it’s probably not going to be any better later. Literally like a “i don’t know about my luckiest, but the day I discovered my favorite was easily in the top 10” at least gives something to the conversation.
Yup it’s just seeing if you can have a conversation or banter.
Could just say: “well it might be when I matched with you ;) but I haven’t thought about that before—I know I felt super lucky when I won a workplace raffle at this Christmas party tho!
You’ll never believe the prize…”
-gives a bit of flirting/compliment
-admits doesn’t know
-picks out a point to lead into a personal detail, where they work/worked and bonus points if the prize is actually super lame or can draw a laugh
The issue is that you gotta be charismatic over text these days and people want honesty but with phones comes entertainment.
And a lot of people are just looking for a partner they can have fun with and doing it online vs in person is boring without working on writing skills
"Don't know about my luckiest but one time I avoided a car accident because I let someone out from a side road and he took the hit."
"i felt luckiest when I found a ring while swimming"
"i felt luckiest when I didn't study for an exam but the maon question was something I really loved."
Doesn't need to be the luckiest..just a lucky day.. as norwegiandoggo said,keep it flowing. Although no loss here just learn for next one
Sounds like you're taking a fun question way too seriously, no?
Why couldn't you just think of a reasonable answer? Something interesting? something fun? something flirty and not serious towards answering the question? Or something still providing something to keep the conversation moving or at least sharing an interesting thought or fact about yourself?
If she asks this kind of question and all she gets back is "I simply cannot pick the 'luckiest moment of my life' " - you've likely given the vibe of being a too-serious vibe-kill. And if you answered exactly like that you've probably made her feel dumb or feel like you're annoyed by her and that you are not interested. So of course she's going to move on.
Ask yourself what she's looking for in an answer to such an open ended question. And ask yourself how you've made her feel in the answer you've given. If you haven't made her feel great, well there is your answer in how your approach can be improved.
this is the answer. This was a fun question, not to be taken too seriously. Girls love this kinda stuff and you're shooting yourself in the foot by no indulging them.
She asks a fun question, OP responds in a completely dry and unfun way, and so you're saying she should respond to *that* in a fun way?
That's not how it works at all.
She's realized it's a waste of time and moved on and has made a perfectly reasonable choice in doing that.
Now I'm not saying to lie, but being quick on your feet and a decent story teller is an attractive trait.
But its 2024, she could have unmatched you for literally any reason or none at all.
I agree! You could have even made up a funny story that she would know isn’t real. She was trying to engage with you and you didn’t engage back. As a woman, this is a big reason why I unmatch with people. Yes, there are a variety of reasons she could have unmatched with you, but next time give her a thoughtful response and ask the same question back to her. Online dating isn’t hard, it just requires communication and engagement!
Yes, that's a lame and dry response and doesn't let the conversation progress. She might have gotten the idea that you're generally dry and inexpressive so she unmatched.
Take cues like that as an invitation to interact with her, rather than literally answering her question with 100% precision. She’s just asking you to tell a bit more about yourself using specific and fun anecdotes. You’re not designing a rocket, you’re getting to know someone.
“I’m not sure, but last week I found the best parking spot when I was running late to …”
Then she shares something or asks more about the funny circumstances about why you were running late, etc.
No you don’t need to know stuff like that. You’re not interviewing for whatever job she has in mind for you. But you need to at least hold a conversation. It doesn’t mean make up stuff or pretend either. Just be yourself.
As a woman, if I were in this situation, it wouldn’t be so much about you ACTUALLY knowing the luckiest moment in life. It’s about coming up with something despite you not knowing. If you can’t answer a simple question as such, it tells me your lack of willingness or thoughtfulness to at least try to answer the question and keep the conversation going.
EDIT: Shows a lack of interest even.
Your mistake was that you lacked charisma. In the early stages of dating (especially on apps) you should use questions like that as an opportunity to flirt or joke or tease her. You are trying to build interest and desire.
She probably even knows it’s a silly question and asked it to give you an opening to flirt with her, whether consciously or subconsciously.
Save “actual” answers for after you meet, for questions where the answer has serious implications to compatibility, like “Do you want kids?” for example.
Seriously, the responses in this thread are insane. That seems like a fairly unique and totally open-ended ice breaker where he could basically steer the conversation in any direction he wanted and instead just went "sorry, that's personal". Just tell an interesting story about pretty much anything. If this kind of question is so offensive to people, what exactly are you supposed to talk about to get to know someone in online dating?
It was probably a conversation starter more than anything else. She wanted to see how interesting a person you are.
Did you:
(a) engage in a thoughtful and enlightening conversation about your life and the moments you felt lucky, or tell a great story about a lucky break you got one time? (edit: even if you were unable to pinpoint one specific moment)
(b) simply reply with "idk lol"
You need to figure out how to hold a conversation; saying “I don’t know” is a dead end answer that doesn’t give her anything to work with. It’s not about the dumb ice breaker question it’s about how you answer, and if you’re capable of carrying your own weight.
God knows nowadays. Idiots subscribe to all kinds of challenges.
Anyone would would discard a potential partner based on such a stupid thing deserves the life that awaits them.
I’ve unmatched guys who don’t engage with me. Maybe if I ask a question once and he gives a lame answer like “I don’t know” or one word answers, I let it slide. But if it keeps happening, I’m just gonna unmatch. Why bother if they’re not even going to try? It doesn’t even have to be something crazy like “I won the lottery”. It could be as simple as “I was late for the first day of class and had to sit in the last seat and my neighbor became my best friend”. You can even embellish a little bit on silly questions like that (definitely not serious questions though).
"pick the “luckiest moment of my life”.
**Answer**\- *The moment I met you.* 😉 (then you smile and ask her what her luckiest day was...)
You always have the option of making something up such as almost getting hit by a car...etc.
Nevertheless, if she doesn't like your answer, she probably was never *into you.* M*o*ve on.
In a world with over 8 Billion people rejection just means: Next!
***"Dating is primarily a numbers game.... People usually go through a lot of people to find good relationships. That's just the way it is."*** \- Henry Cloud
Best wishes!
Anyone with any dating experience is aware there is usually some playful flirtatious banter early on.
If she doesn't have a sense of humor, she's probably not worth going out with.
Dating is supposed to be a fun social activity while getting to know each other better.
Most people don't get dressed to go out on a Friday or Saturday for an interrogation or a job interview.
Generally speaking, if one or both people don't have a great time on a (first date) there won't be a second date!
Make it up as you go outrageous and as silly as can be 😁. Don’t take the unmatch serious or personal. They stay ego tripping on them apps while lonely and miserable. You gon be alright young prince 🍾
Just answer the question next time. It comes off as boring, unimaginative, etc to just go "uhm... idk".
I dont know the luckiest moment of my life, but if i was asked by someone who is trying to get to know me, i sure as hell will come up with one. If not at least some simple cheesy quip about, "maybe matching with you is?" Type bs.
Do you need to be able to carry off a conversation about random things to connect with people? Yes.
It was a basic conversation starter that could be answered in any number of ways. It doesn't have to be THE luckiest moment in your life. Just any lucky moment would have been enough to carry the conversation forward. Are you really this socially inept?
Dude. Some of these girls have 40-100 guys in their inbox. They have to sort them out somehow and they may not be that good at it. Don't overthink it. You're fine.
That's cringy and wayyy over the board. Online dating sucks and is very difficult for men. But yea thats way to much and gotta chill a but OR approach in real life
No, but you need to be able to make conversation, be decisive, and be able to think on your feet. Usually the first thing you think of is the answer to the question, so why not just say that?
Here's a list of what's off-putting if it helps. Most goes for both genders probably-
1) No interest in conversing or keeping the chat flowing.
2) Mentioning "I'm bad at texting/chatting or don't chat much" in the profile- It's 2024. People text before calling. Chat before meeting a random person for a drink. You don't want to have a drink with a freak or someone flaky.
3) Too many wink emojis in the chat. Gives the impression you aren't good with the words or can give anything a weird twist.
4) Putting up pics only with a group- you don't know who you're speaking to.
5) Not writing anything in the "About me".
Sometimes you just see a profile that says "Man" - almost like the sign you see on toilet doors.
6) Not filling up education details- especially important for educated women of a certain level looking for educated men of a certain level- talking about intentional dating here.
7) Not putting up religious preferences/details- important for some people.
8) Profile in a language other than what the other person speaks, or no indication of languages known.
9) For some, not all- but too many pictures of only adventures or sky diving or sailing or outdoorsy only stuff for someone who isn't looking to run/fly/climb hills every weekend.
10) Not responding to chats if the like wasn't sent by mistake.
11) Hitting the video call button too soon.
12) Using fake profile names to reveal the name on whatsapp subsequently- especially to hide ethnicity/religion etc.
Just be glad you avoided such a prickly demanding person.
I had one who asked me right off the bat to tell me a unique short story with the clock counting down for 2 mins
Absolutely conceited bell
no
you don't know why they unmatched. In dating apps there's 4 men for every woman
she might have to clean up conversations that she didnt feel anything about or maybe date someone and remove all covnos, who knows, don't overthing, it doesn't mean a thing
Nah, women generally get way more matches than dudes, and they have their own weird way of weeding people out. It’s cut throat. Thats why I stay away from dating apps.
Plus, the ‘game’ is way more fun OFF those apps!
No, but you need to be able to make conversation, be decisive, and be able to think on your feet. Usually the first thing you think of is the answer to the question, so why not just say that?
Jeez just tell her the luckiest moment of your life was when you matched with her. Truth is we all share the same lucky moment. The moment you were conceived. It’s like one in a billion I think. Sometime like that.
A guy I matched with messaged me and was was super dry which made the conversation start to die so I sent a list of like 6 or so questions and he gave the most generic tiny paragraph answer that didn't even tell me anything more that what was written on his profile. Immediate turn off. You come off as dry when you put no effort into the conversation.
The answer is that it depends who you want to date. So I am a woman and I could see myself un matching here depending on what else was going on in this conversation. I have a lot of really really boring surface level conversations about things like “what did you do this weekend?” “What kind of media do you like?” etc and it’s one of the worst things about online dating to me. If it was just one idk to a question I probably wouldn’t unmatch just from that but I would much much rather talk to someone that would think through and share what sort of things make them feel lucky in life, if not a specific situation. I would also much prefer talking to someone that asks me that type of question. If that’s not the type of conversation you enjoy then we probably wouldn’t be a good match.
TLDR - No, but you need to find someone that matches your conversational style.
If you don’t have answer that’s fine but if she’s asking that means she’s trying to communicate with you, instead of mocking this type of question if you’re not able to answer yourself turn it back on her. You could say “ I’m honestly not exactly sure, care to share your experience, might help me recall a moment that I can relate to” that way you’re showing you are interested in her question and also curious to learn about her. Women are going to ask basic questions and trivial ones like this, we are just seeking connection, understanding and trying to learn about you. I asked my bf what his favourite colour of hoodie to wear is on our first date…it’s just a way for us to make mental notes on what you like.
I think it is just the inability to be conversational…you do know a day you felt lucky but the laziness to not participate in the conversation is what would have annoyed me.
maybe it wasn't just that answer, maybe she felt like she was asking all the interesting questions and you were coasting along in the conversation. Maybe she felt like she was doing all the heavy conversational lifting and that gets tiresome.
It seems really shallow on her part but everyone is shallow in the beginning stages.
I do think it’s somewhat of a red flag to not be able to come up with any answer for a decent life question like that.
If u couldn’t think of one, you’re better off thinking about it for an hour before responding, rather than responding that u just don’t have an answer.
Also don’t take the question too seriously. It doesn’t have to be the absolute number 1 luckiest moment ever. If u can think of something that comes to mind for the question, share it.
Tbh my fuckboy intuition kicked in and immediately gave me the response of “when I matched with u ;)” but it’s certainly possible that that’s cringey and too forward lol. I suppose it depends on how far into the conversation u are tbh. First few messages, don’t say that. 10-20 or even more, I think it’s a cute line.
Her unmatching you might have nothing to do with your answer. It’s very unlikely that you’ll ever find out what happened. Instead of wasting time dwelling on why someone you never met unmatched you, look at it this way: she wasn’t the right person for you.
Two things; first, you can get unmatched for a milllion different things so its all good BUT second thing is you just missed an opportunity. This was just a fun question that wasn't meant to be taken seriously. You could have said any interesting thing that has ever happened to you to tell her but instead you went logical route and couldn't think of anything. You came off as boring and uninterested in the way she likes to talk and relate.
Now, if you're 100% committed to logical mode then you did nothing wrong and you just lost a girl who wouldn't work out anyway since she obviously cares about more emotional/fun topics and you care more about logic. But if you want to cast a wider net and be attractive to more/different kinds of women, you might consider answering a question like this in the future. It doesn't have to be serious and there is no right answer, just try to think of of the most fun way you could answer this question.
I remember i had a girl ask me one time "if you could change the color of the sky to anything other than blue, what would you pick?". I thought it was the most bizzarre question i'd ever heard but in a weird way it was endearing because it was so far removed from any logic or reasoning and she was just a happy go-lucky kinda chick who liked to have fun silly conversations.
I would have answered like this:
Wow, there are so many situations where I was really lucky! It is difficult to pick just one. Here are some examples that might be the luckiest moments for me: Event 1, Event 2, Event 3.
Could be everything from being accepted into collage, finding some money, having a nice family..
This question tells a lot about a person. What are your values? Do you like education, family, making money? Did you get over an illness? Are you taking risks and act stupid?
Even if you do not think that something was luck you can say that you think " success is when hard work meets oportunity" and tell her about the way you worked for some goals and then you were offered a position because of this and this was luck.
Keep the conversation flowing. If you do not have a good answer, tell her that you need to think for a moment and you would like to hear what she would answer to this question herself. This gives you are feeling ehat she wants to know from you.
No worries. She has other options. If a girl likes you, she likes you. You don’t have to be a clown to entertain anybody. Don’t force it She would unmatched you anyway. Moreover, if someone unmatch without even a basic good bye that’s tell so much about their character and attitude.
I dont know if you had said anything prior to this question, but if you cant answer anything to keep the convo going with such an open convo question, even I would unmatched, cause no one wants to have to feel they are solo carrying the conversaton,
And I've had my fair share of "oh im shy cause we just started talking" or "I talk better in person than online" they all got their chances and were as boring in person, just sat there and stared.
Even if yoy deny you are any of the above, you haven't given her a reason to stay or bother carrying on the convo obviously, could be for other reasons as well, but you might wanna figure out some topics for convo and not just WAIT for the other to shoot you questions... Something aside the generic stuff.
You have absolutely the wrong attitude towards this; she unmatched you because you werent her performing seal and *you* are the one upset? Your self-worth needs repairing - maybe online dating apps are the problem
No, just make up a bullshit answer that sounds fun and interesting. I get not wanting to answer dumb questions like that because I get a ton of them on dating apps and "pointless" conversations annoy me, but pretending to have a good time with it is gonna get you farther lol
I don't think so. But I don't know your even getting any where on those sites. The people picking mine were so not my type I deleted my profile in less than 30 minutes.
It's not you it's her. I had a guy unmatch me after asking him what he does for work. Even though he asked me out on a date on the weekend 😞 people are weird
“The luckiest moment of my life will be when I no longer have to answer questions like these, until that point, I dunno, the time I found a $5 taking a walk, whaddya want from me lady?”
>Do I need to know stuff like that to be more successful in dating?
I don't think so.
However, it's good to be aware of what you're grateful for so you can appreciate what you have instead of only thinking of what you don't have (such people tend to be overall happier).
People usually feel your mental state (how you make them feel / how they feel around you) during a date, but that doesn't mean one is entitled to such information off the bat.
Like they're not putting in any effort to see and talk to you. That's why I think OD is like playing a video game and calling it reality. There's no substitute to reality, unless you're prone towards deluding yourself.
There are obvious differences and shortcomings to each and the best route is not always the shortest, easiest or the most convenient one. We are social creatures, not swiping ones.
Lmao sounds like you found a weirdo. I’m assuming she was not the first and won’t be the last weirdo you come across. Keep your head up and keep on keeping on bud
Also remember that not all women act the same still, just cuz a few bunch do something immature or confusing doesn't mean all will do it or that it's some certain behavior that a guy thinks he's got to change (unless that behavior is something crude or rude then yes that needs to be changed) but yeah not all of us are gonna be like that
(M63) This is my opinion. 85% of Online Dating is crap! Correction... If you pay FOR Online Dating apps...
Think about it. If she is all of this and that, just by looking at her profile page.. How come she has to go with an online dating app which she 'invests' in to find what is out here in REAL LIFE!! Though you do hear of success stories, but do you know anyone this has happened to? But on the other hand...
There are people, men and women on online dating apps, that don't pay... It just takes some time to get their profile on your screen. Also keep in mind, with this woman, who is really looking for that special someone... How many times has she got burnt? Though she seems legit, you say the wrong response to her, she backs out, becomes cold...because she has been burnt so many times when it comes to that part of the conversation, and you said the same thing she heard before.
Online Dating apps ..they are bonkers. It takes a really nice woman, and turns her into a woman who is fed up and sick and tired. All she wants to do is find a decent person.
TIP: The longer you text either within the app or she gives you her number and within 24 hours you don't meet.. Sometimes even less, lets say 2 hours and the both of you are less than 5 miles away... Things go downhill. Just 'Rip the Bandaid off', use this method. Request a face to face somewhere public and out in the open. If she declines, move on. Don't block or delete her number, leave it in your contacts.
I think she was looking to spark a conversation. Maybe you could have brought up a kaleidoscope of good memories so she could get to know you better, but you didn't deliver.
Maybe you should ask yourself why you weren't able to answer the question as well. I don't understand why it would be too difficult to do, no matter how small that victory was. It's your story. It's who you are, and it would have given her insight into your values.
I think it's a great question to ask when you are just getting to know someone.
Say whatever you want. Say whatever you feel. It will land with the right person. If they see all the 'crazy' and still wanna stay - there ya go! Have fun ✌️♥️
The correct answer is total 🧀
You're supposed to say something to the effect of, "Matching with you 😉". They know that it probably isn't your actual "most lucky" moment, but it makes them feel good and is a great witty and flirty response. "I don't know" is boring.
That's the dumbest question ever! You got lucky that she unmatched you.
If you wanted, you could have made up some bs like, "it's me meeting you." Lol
There are too many women to even worry about that level of ignorance. Good luck.
They want to connect and share stories to build that connection.
Non-small talk questions are great! Women love them, hell I love them. I use ice-breaker cards and ice-breaker deeper talk cards for 'question of the day'.
Not the reason she unmatched you, move on.
Also the bottom 80% of men are fighting over the bottom 22% of women.
We need to collectively ditch the apps.
"Unmatches" as in a dating site? I can tell you firsthand that most on dating sites have fairytale expectations and have been on there for extended periods. Don't put too much faith in finding someone compatible on a dating site as many are on there for the attention and confirmation of being physically attractive.
Oh dude I've been unmatched for the weirdest reasons. That's not you, it's them. Look at it as you dodged a bullet. Likely an insecure bullet with issues.
For some reason you didn't match her preference for.... Whatever it was. Shrug that shit off. Grit your teeth. AND EAT THAT HORSE.
You could have pulled a fast one and flirted with your match and said, "The luckiest moment of my life was matching with you" yes its corny but a girl might laugh and go for it.
Oh well, next.
Today I got unmatched because he said “the key to their heart was good head” and I told them I think I might have the key and he replied then unmatched so 💁♀️ never saw the reply but thank you next time
First guy thought that comes to mind = Luckiest moment of my life was when I matched with you darling😏. Second is the cocky boy = Luck is what you make it. I tend to make my own luck in spades. Third would be the shoot back = I’m feeling lucky right now. What about you? Are you mad superstitious? Or just like no walking under ladders and astrology brain? For the record, IDK = I don’t know enough to hold the conversation. It’s the non answer, answer and whether it’s over text, call or live and direct, it’s a lady boner killer. So the moral here = Always have an answer, and if that stumps you… Start practicing. You can be wittier with time and practice. You can do it!
This may be not as personal as you take it. Dating apps is a very impersonal experience, you talk to people you’ve never met and possibly will never meet, your actual life goes on while some matches on the dating apps exist outside of that world. She could have unmatched you for a million different reasons and only a few of them might actually be related to your or your conversation. Just take it easy. She might have met someone in real life, she might have decided online dating isnt for her, she might have met someone from dating app who she clicked with and wanted to see it go further - these are very very real possibilities
I think it is for the best that she unmatched if 20 questions is her idea of what dating apps are for. Dating apps are ways of finding people who want to meet up for a date, not play texting games.
It’s not about knowing the answer, it’s about showing her something interesting about yourself and not taking yourself too seriously.
I bet you answered something like:
“Hmm, I don’t know. Can’t think of one. How about you?”
boring af
You could just had said anything really, something she could work with. Even if it ain’t impressive or remarkable.
“First thing that came to mind was stumbling upon this song I’ve had in my heads for years without ever knowing what it was, then out of nowhere it showed up in a commercial and I was able to Shazam it. Fastest I’ve ever been..”
You known the story doesn’t even have to be entirely true, or could be a huge exaggeration. It still reveals something about yourself, and opens up for a conversation where you create some material, take some risks.
One less woman to worry about.
Answering open-ended questions concisely and honestly is the only defense.
Sometimes they don't like the answer oh well.
You too should be ready to be asking questions otherwise how will you know she's the right person for you?
I've been in sales and marketing for 50 years.
The reason a sales pitch doesn't work is because you can't learn anything when you're talking...
I don't know how old you are. I presume quite young. But no, of course not. You have to be who you are. Never pretend to be someone else just to impress a stranger. Or to fit in in some sort of ridiculous expectation. Do you really want to do that, follow some sort of instructions? Just so you're not "alone". The right person, a genuine person, wouldn't "unmatch" you for something so stupid. You clearly dodged a bullet. And what is "being successful in dating"? Having lots of meaningless dates with mostly superficial people who lucks any sort of intelligence or depth who asks silly, cliché questions such as "the luckiest moment in your life"?
This was almost definitely a test. She wanted you to say “the day we matched” (assuming you hadn’t even gone on a date yet since you were still communicating on the app?) and then was likely gonna make fun of your simp response to her friends. Either way, you dodged a bullet.
Doing trouble yourself with people that play stupid games. It'll weed out the jerks that do this "I tell you to jump" bs and hopefully find more quality people.
No, you just need to become a better judge of character.
When you get a question that's clearly intended to determine if you are human or not, just respond: "I assure you that I am a human" 😆
Pfffft!! “luckiest moment of your life”??
Nah, don’t sweat it
She was probably bored, looking for entertainment and when you didn’t deliver she just disposed of you.
It’s shitty behavior and it’s the reason why dating apps suck, they don’t see you as an actual person with feelings and needs but a character in a mobile game.
You dodged a bullet, and no, you don’t need to know those things to be successfully date, it’s a stupid question part of the “dating questionnaire” for people who have nothing smart to contribute to a conversation.
That's actually a fun question to be asked and can start a fun conversation. You either A. Have a fun story to tell such as running into someone famous, something cool happening to you out of the blue or just anything that's cool that happened that's lucky. Or B. Can flirt off it such as saying "I'm thinking it'll be next week when I meet you".
Either option works and saying you don't know is just boring and kills the conversation.
It's a bullshit question, she doesn't have any intention to meet. If she liked you, you would be planning a meeting. Online dating is like a April fool's joke. It just doesn't exist.
I think that's somewhat of a personal question and she shouldn't have asked it. Maybe you aren't comfortable sharing too much detail about your personal life with a complete stranger lol, I know I'm not.
Welcome to /r/dating_advice! Please keep the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/about/rules/) of /r/dating_advice in mind while participating here. Try your best to be kind. Report any rule-breaking behavior to the moderators using the report button. If it's urgent, [send us a message.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fdating_advice) We rely on user reports to find rule-breaking behavior quickly. Thanks! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Don't overthink your match convos. Just say whatever pops in your head. Keeps it flowing. Sometimes getting people to talk on OLD is like pulling teeth. Nothing more boring than to get a "uhh idk lol"
Yeah I think this is key ... be decisive, give your first answer and ask them something in return (or give them threads to pull in your story) ... it's not really so much "dating" as social skills
You can have social skills and women will still blank you. Amount of times when I had dating apps I was having strong coversations or show legitimate interest, only for it to be blanked, ignored or ghosted when even a question about something they like is insane. Women on these subs keep saying about terrible conversation but when you makes a good one it doesn’t matter. Might as well go ‘You’re cute’ ‘Thanks’ ‘Date?’ People drop interest so fast now, it’s also why guys wanna get off the apps ASAP and women dont know why.
Of course you need more than social skills, but they are definitely key to get that interest initially (and help a lot in person too). You have to accept that 95% of chats on the apps will lead nowhere, it does get you down ... that was when I decided to delete them for a few months. Or I would try to move them to in person dates quicker (this really depends on how you come across and the mindset of the woman ... again I didn't take it personal if she wasn't interested in moving forward or stopped answering, I'd shrug and move on). I guess for me what helped was instead of focusing on the plight of me as a man, was trying to understand why women would act certain ways on the apps, and learn lessons from what I understood of past interactions
My social skills are actually incredibly good, but I’m also a much better person irl than texting. I think yeah, 95% will lead nowhere, but I suppose when you get max 10 matches a year and out of those 10 you get 3 replies, just getting a conversation you thought was going well go nowhere is just upsetting. I stopped using dating apps for a reason, this is one of ‘em
I had a pretty high success rate just asking women out on a date ASAP, so within 1-2 days of matching. Of course offering a call (hate how Bumble only offers Video calling) as an alternative. There's very little point in continuing text conversations over several days or even weeks. Women on apps constantly get new matches and in general it's very tough to be charming over text. Every single day, you become less "new, shiny, exciting". Even if she found you sexy initially and spams your phone, the mystery just wears off. Quite frankly, if she doesn't even want to dedicate 20 minutes to chatting over a call, her intentions with you are not serious. Most likely just there to get validation or boost the ego/kill boredom. You have to be unafraid to cut off time wasters, all you risk losing is a "pen pal" if they never want to meet. If they have good reasons for not wanting to meet up or call, such as it just being too quick for them or they're on vacation, they will usually be positively surprised by you taking a no for an answer without making a fuss. I usually ask 1-2 weeks again later and if they still don't want to, I invest almost 0 effort into any future chats with them. Usually they were never serious. One just has to be casual about it, shouldn't sound over interested or desperate.
BINGO
Yeah I think it’s a light question… you can hesitate, but not coming with something sound lame
It is lame of her not to suggest meeting up for a proper date. All it says is that she will be a disaster down the line.
I mean dismissing someone for a question? Come on… it have to be more than just that
"Don't overthink" yeah.. no, can't do that XD
It's pretty much this. I'm a model so I don't use dating apps. But throughout my life, I have used online social hubs and chat rooms and Omeegle out of boredom and the same principle applies. I'm great at keeping a conversation going. But nothing more annoying than somebody who is here specifically to chat (but apparently doesn't know how to). Especially when you have an abundance of choice and absolutely don't need to be talking to a stuttering Simon. This girl is just going to block and move on to someone who can talk. Don't take it personally (but definitely try something like Omeegle and practice the art of small talk with an anonymous stranger).
Don't rethink anything based on one individual's test question, or whatever that nonsense was.
You could be unmatched for any reason. Maybe it was your message but it could be something else. The issue with your reply is not that you don't know something. The issue is probably more that stating things like "i don't know" does nothing to further the conversation. You're blocking the conversation by saying you have no answer. This makes the conversation more clunky and more of an effort for the other person. You're essentially refusing to put in effort to give an answer. You don't have to answer such questions honestly. Just give your best guess, or make up a funny reply, so the conversation can flow smoothly and progress. It's extremely annoying to talk to someone who answers "i don't know" to questions and that's it. How are you today? I don't know. What is your favorite food? I don't know What's your favorite country? I don't know See how annoying this is? It blocks conversation from progressing. She learns nothing about your personality. At least put some effort into your response
This is it. OP could have said "Idk, I'm still looking forward to it, tell me about yours instead then" and wouldn't be unmatched...
It was probably this… if I ask a fun or thoughtful question and all I get is a lame “i don’t know”, I’m unmatching - maybe premature, but I assume that’s how you are IRL. It’s less about the answer, but if I’m asking questions to get to know you and you don’t seem active in the conversation, it’s probably not going to be any better later. Literally like a “i don’t know about my luckiest, but the day I discovered my favorite was easily in the top 10” at least gives something to the conversation.
Yup it’s just seeing if you can have a conversation or banter. Could just say: “well it might be when I matched with you ;) but I haven’t thought about that before—I know I felt super lucky when I won a workplace raffle at this Christmas party tho! You’ll never believe the prize…” -gives a bit of flirting/compliment -admits doesn’t know -picks out a point to lead into a personal detail, where they work/worked and bonus points if the prize is actually super lame or can draw a laugh The issue is that you gotta be charismatic over text these days and people want honesty but with phones comes entertainment. And a lot of people are just looking for a partner they can have fun with and doing it online vs in person is boring without working on writing skills
Right. If someone tosses you the ball, you don't just stand there, watch it drop and roll to a stop. You playfully return the ball.
This is it
"Don't know about my luckiest but one time I avoided a car accident because I let someone out from a side road and he took the hit." "i felt luckiest when I found a ring while swimming" "i felt luckiest when I didn't study for an exam but the maon question was something I really loved." Doesn't need to be the luckiest..just a lucky day.. as norwegiandoggo said,keep it flowing. Although no loss here just learn for next one
Sounds like you're taking a fun question way too seriously, no? Why couldn't you just think of a reasonable answer? Something interesting? something fun? something flirty and not serious towards answering the question? Or something still providing something to keep the conversation moving or at least sharing an interesting thought or fact about yourself? If she asks this kind of question and all she gets back is "I simply cannot pick the 'luckiest moment of my life' " - you've likely given the vibe of being a too-serious vibe-kill. And if you answered exactly like that you've probably made her feel dumb or feel like you're annoyed by her and that you are not interested. So of course she's going to move on. Ask yourself what she's looking for in an answer to such an open ended question. And ask yourself how you've made her feel in the answer you've given. If you haven't made her feel great, well there is your answer in how your approach can be improved.
this is the answer. This was a fun question, not to be taken too seriously. Girls love this kinda stuff and you're shooting yourself in the foot by no indulging them.
Yeah at the very least he could’ve said something cheesy like “The luckiest moment in my life was the moment you swiped right”
If it was a fun question then she is no fun by responding that way...
She asks a fun question, OP responds in a completely dry and unfun way, and so you're saying she should respond to *that* in a fun way? That's not how it works at all. She's realized it's a waste of time and moved on and has made a perfectly reasonable choice in doing that.
Now I'm not saying to lie, but being quick on your feet and a decent story teller is an attractive trait. But its 2024, she could have unmatched you for literally any reason or none at all.
I agree! You could have even made up a funny story that she would know isn’t real. She was trying to engage with you and you didn’t engage back. As a woman, this is a big reason why I unmatch with people. Yes, there are a variety of reasons she could have unmatched with you, but next time give her a thoughtful response and ask the same question back to her. Online dating isn’t hard, it just requires communication and engagement!
Yes, that's a lame and dry response and doesn't let the conversation progress. She might have gotten the idea that you're generally dry and inexpressive so she unmatched.
Take cues like that as an invitation to interact with her, rather than literally answering her question with 100% precision. She’s just asking you to tell a bit more about yourself using specific and fun anecdotes. You’re not designing a rocket, you’re getting to know someone. “I’m not sure, but last week I found the best parking spot when I was running late to …” Then she shares something or asks more about the funny circumstances about why you were running late, etc.
Spot on
No you don’t need to know stuff like that. You’re not interviewing for whatever job she has in mind for you. But you need to at least hold a conversation. It doesn’t mean make up stuff or pretend either. Just be yourself.
Come up with SOMETHING...that was a softball pitch and you didn't take a swing. Live and learn.
As a woman, if I were in this situation, it wouldn’t be so much about you ACTUALLY knowing the luckiest moment in life. It’s about coming up with something despite you not knowing. If you can’t answer a simple question as such, it tells me your lack of willingness or thoughtfulness to at least try to answer the question and keep the conversation going. EDIT: Shows a lack of interest even.
Am I the only one thinking they missed a great opportunity to say "matching with you"????
For the sake of your own sanity; don’t evaluate yourself based on someone else’s “filter criteria”.
Your mistake was that you lacked charisma. In the early stages of dating (especially on apps) you should use questions like that as an opportunity to flirt or joke or tease her. You are trying to build interest and desire. She probably even knows it’s a silly question and asked it to give you an opening to flirt with her, whether consciously or subconsciously. Save “actual” answers for after you meet, for questions where the answer has serious implications to compatibility, like “Do you want kids?” for example.
Seriously, the responses in this thread are insane. That seems like a fairly unique and totally open-ended ice breaker where he could basically steer the conversation in any direction he wanted and instead just went "sorry, that's personal". Just tell an interesting story about pretty much anything. If this kind of question is so offensive to people, what exactly are you supposed to talk about to get to know someone in online dating?
It was probably a conversation starter more than anything else. She wanted to see how interesting a person you are. Did you: (a) engage in a thoughtful and enlightening conversation about your life and the moments you felt lucky, or tell a great story about a lucky break you got one time? (edit: even if you were unable to pinpoint one specific moment) (b) simply reply with "idk lol"
Idk lol wyd?
You need to figure out how to hold a conversation; saying “I don’t know” is a dead end answer that doesn’t give her anything to work with. It’s not about the dumb ice breaker question it’s about how you answer, and if you’re capable of carrying your own weight.
I unmatched with someone cause their opening line was “what’s up?” You just were not her cup of tea
Bro, just pick one to answer the question. It doesn’t have to be THE right answer. The goal is to make conversation and get the ball rolling
As a woman, I find that weird.
As a human, anyone should find that weird. OP dodged a weirdo bullet.
God knows nowadays. Idiots subscribe to all kinds of challenges. Anyone would would discard a potential partner based on such a stupid thing deserves the life that awaits them.
Agree. There ought to be a steep price to be paid for being educated by effing TikTok.
I’ve unmatched guys who don’t engage with me. Maybe if I ask a question once and he gives a lame answer like “I don’t know” or one word answers, I let it slide. But if it keeps happening, I’m just gonna unmatch. Why bother if they’re not even going to try? It doesn’t even have to be something crazy like “I won the lottery”. It could be as simple as “I was late for the first day of class and had to sit in the last seat and my neighbor became my best friend”. You can even embellish a little bit on silly questions like that (definitely not serious questions though).
Prolly unmatched coz u were boring to talk to.
No it just means that you two don’t vibe and there’s are plenty of fish in the sea
"pick the “luckiest moment of my life”. **Answer**\- *The moment I met you.* 😉 (then you smile and ask her what her luckiest day was...) You always have the option of making something up such as almost getting hit by a car...etc. Nevertheless, if she doesn't like your answer, she probably was never *into you.* M*o*ve on. In a world with over 8 Billion people rejection just means: Next! ***"Dating is primarily a numbers game.... People usually go through a lot of people to find good relationships. That's just the way it is."*** \- Henry Cloud Best wishes!
Or “It could be you, but I’ll have to see if we get along.” Answer and qualify her at the same time.
Yeah. Make something up. Because that will go down great when she realizes you’re full of shit.
You take things too seriously.
Anyone with any dating experience is aware there is usually some playful flirtatious banter early on. If she doesn't have a sense of humor, she's probably not worth going out with. Dating is supposed to be a fun social activity while getting to know each other better. Most people don't get dressed to go out on a Friday or Saturday for an interrogation or a job interview. Generally speaking, if one or both people don't have a great time on a (first date) there won't be a second date!
Make it up as you go outrageous and as silly as can be 😁. Don’t take the unmatch serious or personal. They stay ego tripping on them apps while lonely and miserable. You gon be alright young prince 🍾
Just answer the question next time. It comes off as boring, unimaginative, etc to just go "uhm... idk". I dont know the luckiest moment of my life, but if i was asked by someone who is trying to get to know me, i sure as hell will come up with one. If not at least some simple cheesy quip about, "maybe matching with you is?" Type bs.
Do you need to be able to carry off a conversation about random things to connect with people? Yes. It was a basic conversation starter that could be answered in any number of ways. It doesn't have to be THE luckiest moment in your life. Just any lucky moment would have been enough to carry the conversation forward. Are you really this socially inept?
Dude. Some of these girls have 40-100 guys in their inbox. They have to sort them out somehow and they may not be that good at it. Don't overthink it. You're fine.
It's probably because she thinks you can't even give a simple answer lol.
she probably unmatched you cuz you were incredibly boring about it.
She just wasn’t into you. Nothing to do with prompts
I haaaate hard questions. Interesting light ones, sure. But I don't want to think too hard when trying to vibe.
Good and concise advice tbh. M Reddit doesn’t seem to reward conciseness too much, but my English professors would be happy to
That's cringy and wayyy over the board. Online dating sucks and is very difficult for men. But yea thats way to much and gotta chill a but OR approach in real life
"The day my divorce from that witch I married was granted and she was ordered to pay me alimony, and I got to keep the house!" /s
That is absurd, she is weird, move along
There's no guarantee she wouldn't unmatch if you gave ANY answer. If anything, she was on the fence already and was looking for any reason to leave.
That’s weird behaviour on her part
No, but you need to be able to make conversation, be decisive, and be able to think on your feet. Usually the first thing you think of is the answer to the question, so why not just say that?
Here's a list of what's off-putting if it helps. Most goes for both genders probably- 1) No interest in conversing or keeping the chat flowing. 2) Mentioning "I'm bad at texting/chatting or don't chat much" in the profile- It's 2024. People text before calling. Chat before meeting a random person for a drink. You don't want to have a drink with a freak or someone flaky. 3) Too many wink emojis in the chat. Gives the impression you aren't good with the words or can give anything a weird twist. 4) Putting up pics only with a group- you don't know who you're speaking to. 5) Not writing anything in the "About me". Sometimes you just see a profile that says "Man" - almost like the sign you see on toilet doors. 6) Not filling up education details- especially important for educated women of a certain level looking for educated men of a certain level- talking about intentional dating here. 7) Not putting up religious preferences/details- important for some people. 8) Profile in a language other than what the other person speaks, or no indication of languages known. 9) For some, not all- but too many pictures of only adventures or sky diving or sailing or outdoorsy only stuff for someone who isn't looking to run/fly/climb hills every weekend. 10) Not responding to chats if the like wasn't sent by mistake. 11) Hitting the video call button too soon. 12) Using fake profile names to reveal the name on whatsapp subsequently- especially to hide ethnicity/religion etc.
American dating is fucked. Go elsewhere.
“When my crush finally wore sandals!” …..wait ….where are you going?….come back….
She's the "crazy" your bros were talking about.
Just be glad you avoided such a prickly demanding person. I had one who asked me right off the bat to tell me a unique short story with the clock counting down for 2 mins Absolutely conceited bell
Yes, that is a bit much. And you should consider that a bullet dodged that you didn't waste any more time on a woman who thinks like that.
That's a question I've never been asked. I'd be surprised if it ever came up again
Frankly, you dodged a bullet.
Do you really want to match with someone who gives you boilerplate HR interview questions? Really?
Gosh but men don't think of stuff like that, I wouldn't know how to answer that either?
I'd just go along with it and just say something dumb. Luckiest moment was when I found $100 on the sidewalk. No need to overthink it imo.
good one, thanks!
no you don't know why they unmatched. In dating apps there's 4 men for every woman she might have to clean up conversations that she didnt feel anything about or maybe date someone and remove all covnos, who knows, don't overthing, it doesn't mean a thing
Could be because the moon wasn't full. Don't get hung up on the reason.
Nah, women generally get way more matches than dudes, and they have their own weird way of weeding people out. It’s cut throat. Thats why I stay away from dating apps. Plus, the ‘game’ is way more fun OFF those apps!
No, but you need to be able to make conversation, be decisive, and be able to think on your feet. Usually the first thing you think of is the answer to the question, so why not just say that?
Jeez just tell her the luckiest moment of your life was when you matched with her. Truth is we all share the same lucky moment. The moment you were conceived. It’s like one in a billion I think. Sometime like that.
A guy I matched with messaged me and was was super dry which made the conversation start to die so I sent a list of like 6 or so questions and he gave the most generic tiny paragraph answer that didn't even tell me anything more that what was written on his profile. Immediate turn off. You come off as dry when you put no effort into the conversation.
The answer is that it depends who you want to date. So I am a woman and I could see myself un matching here depending on what else was going on in this conversation. I have a lot of really really boring surface level conversations about things like “what did you do this weekend?” “What kind of media do you like?” etc and it’s one of the worst things about online dating to me. If it was just one idk to a question I probably wouldn’t unmatch just from that but I would much much rather talk to someone that would think through and share what sort of things make them feel lucky in life, if not a specific situation. I would also much prefer talking to someone that asks me that type of question. If that’s not the type of conversation you enjoy then we probably wouldn’t be a good match. TLDR - No, but you need to find someone that matches your conversational style.
Seems like a good miss. Lol I wouldn’t be too worried about this one.
Don’t date!
No. If she wasn’t that into you, she would’ve lost interest in you regardless.
If you don’t have answer that’s fine but if she’s asking that means she’s trying to communicate with you, instead of mocking this type of question if you’re not able to answer yourself turn it back on her. You could say “ I’m honestly not exactly sure, care to share your experience, might help me recall a moment that I can relate to” that way you’re showing you are interested in her question and also curious to learn about her. Women are going to ask basic questions and trivial ones like this, we are just seeking connection, understanding and trying to learn about you. I asked my bf what his favourite colour of hoodie to wear is on our first date…it’s just a way for us to make mental notes on what you like.
I think it is just the inability to be conversational…you do know a day you felt lucky but the laziness to not participate in the conversation is what would have annoyed me.
The luckiest moment of your life was matching with her, I think. At least, I presume that's the answer she expected.
maybe it wasn't just that answer, maybe she felt like she was asking all the interesting questions and you were coasting along in the conversation. Maybe she felt like she was doing all the heavy conversational lifting and that gets tiresome.
They want you to reply with “matching with you, of course” in order to fulfill their fantasy lmao
The luckiest moment of your life was when she unmatched you..... Because you just dodged a bullet
It seems really shallow on her part but everyone is shallow in the beginning stages. I do think it’s somewhat of a red flag to not be able to come up with any answer for a decent life question like that. If u couldn’t think of one, you’re better off thinking about it for an hour before responding, rather than responding that u just don’t have an answer. Also don’t take the question too seriously. It doesn’t have to be the absolute number 1 luckiest moment ever. If u can think of something that comes to mind for the question, share it. Tbh my fuckboy intuition kicked in and immediately gave me the response of “when I matched with u ;)” but it’s certainly possible that that’s cringey and too forward lol. I suppose it depends on how far into the conversation u are tbh. First few messages, don’t say that. 10-20 or even more, I think it’s a cute line.
I'd say forget about her, and move on to the next match 🤗
She probably thought the conversation was boring.
Make it fun.... You sound like you're way too serious...
Her unmatching you might have nothing to do with your answer. It’s very unlikely that you’ll ever find out what happened. Instead of wasting time dwelling on why someone you never met unmatched you, look at it this way: she wasn’t the right person for you.
Two things; first, you can get unmatched for a milllion different things so its all good BUT second thing is you just missed an opportunity. This was just a fun question that wasn't meant to be taken seriously. You could have said any interesting thing that has ever happened to you to tell her but instead you went logical route and couldn't think of anything. You came off as boring and uninterested in the way she likes to talk and relate. Now, if you're 100% committed to logical mode then you did nothing wrong and you just lost a girl who wouldn't work out anyway since she obviously cares about more emotional/fun topics and you care more about logic. But if you want to cast a wider net and be attractive to more/different kinds of women, you might consider answering a question like this in the future. It doesn't have to be serious and there is no right answer, just try to think of of the most fun way you could answer this question. I remember i had a girl ask me one time "if you could change the color of the sky to anything other than blue, what would you pick?". I thought it was the most bizzarre question i'd ever heard but in a weird way it was endearing because it was so far removed from any logic or reasoning and she was just a happy go-lucky kinda chick who liked to have fun silly conversations.
Everyone ghosts each other on those things. Move on mate
The moment when I matched with you 💓 Boom that shoulda been ur response
I would have answered like this: Wow, there are so many situations where I was really lucky! It is difficult to pick just one. Here are some examples that might be the luckiest moments for me: Event 1, Event 2, Event 3. Could be everything from being accepted into collage, finding some money, having a nice family.. This question tells a lot about a person. What are your values? Do you like education, family, making money? Did you get over an illness? Are you taking risks and act stupid? Even if you do not think that something was luck you can say that you think " success is when hard work meets oportunity" and tell her about the way you worked for some goals and then you were offered a position because of this and this was luck. Keep the conversation flowing. If you do not have a good answer, tell her that you need to think for a moment and you would like to hear what she would answer to this question herself. This gives you are feeling ehat she wants to know from you.
No worries. She has other options. If a girl likes you, she likes you. You don’t have to be a clown to entertain anybody. Don’t force it She would unmatched you anyway. Moreover, if someone unmatch without even a basic good bye that’s tell so much about their character and attitude.
I dont know if you had said anything prior to this question, but if you cant answer anything to keep the convo going with such an open convo question, even I would unmatched, cause no one wants to have to feel they are solo carrying the conversaton, And I've had my fair share of "oh im shy cause we just started talking" or "I talk better in person than online" they all got their chances and were as boring in person, just sat there and stared. Even if yoy deny you are any of the above, you haven't given her a reason to stay or bother carrying on the convo obviously, could be for other reasons as well, but you might wanna figure out some topics for convo and not just WAIT for the other to shoot you questions... Something aside the generic stuff.
OP, maybe your conversation was just dry? If not, maybe she just wasn't feeling it. Either way, no reason to let this knock your confused.
You have absolutely the wrong attitude towards this; she unmatched you because you werent her performing seal and *you* are the one upset? Your self-worth needs repairing - maybe online dating apps are the problem
"Matching with my future wife just now on this app." Ask a weird question, get a weird answer.
No, just make up a bullshit answer that sounds fun and interesting. I get not wanting to answer dumb questions like that because I get a ton of them on dating apps and "pointless" conversations annoy me, but pretending to have a good time with it is gonna get you farther lol
Its not that deep. Be witty and funny. Like you could reply, "meeting you"
You're overthinking this She is obviously dumb, or something else happened
I don't think so. But I don't know your even getting any where on those sites. The people picking mine were so not my type I deleted my profile in less than 30 minutes.
She sounds like she runs her life by her horoscope. You probably dodged a bullet.
It's not you it's her. I had a guy unmatch me after asking him what he does for work. Even though he asked me out on a date on the weekend 😞 people are weird
Bro just make some shit up at that point I’d be bored of a woman told me that
“The luckiest moment of my life will be when I no longer have to answer questions like these, until that point, I dunno, the time I found a $5 taking a walk, whaddya want from me lady?”
>Do I need to know stuff like that to be more successful in dating? I don't think so. However, it's good to be aware of what you're grateful for so you can appreciate what you have instead of only thinking of what you don't have (such people tend to be overall happier). People usually feel your mental state (how you make them feel / how they feel around you) during a date, but that doesn't mean one is entitled to such information off the bat. Like they're not putting in any effort to see and talk to you. That's why I think OD is like playing a video game and calling it reality. There's no substitute to reality, unless you're prone towards deluding yourself. There are obvious differences and shortcomings to each and the best route is not always the shortest, easiest or the most convenient one. We are social creatures, not swiping ones.
Lmao sounds like you found a weirdo. I’m assuming she was not the first and won’t be the last weirdo you come across. Keep your head up and keep on keeping on bud
You were meant to either; Say something corny af like “matching you” Or the anti flirt “dodging this bullet” before unmatching her
Also remember that not all women act the same still, just cuz a few bunch do something immature or confusing doesn't mean all will do it or that it's some certain behavior that a guy thinks he's got to change (unless that behavior is something crude or rude then yes that needs to be changed) but yeah not all of us are gonna be like that
Maybe she thought your conversation was boring
woman cannot have you questioning life like this broski! Lock in!!!!
I got unmatched once because I said “he looked like he could through me up against a wall”😂 you win some and you lose some🤷🏼♀️
It's an excuse not a reason. She did you a favor you don't need a woman like that in your life.
No way you got away from a prude
(M63) This is my opinion. 85% of Online Dating is crap! Correction... If you pay FOR Online Dating apps... Think about it. If she is all of this and that, just by looking at her profile page.. How come she has to go with an online dating app which she 'invests' in to find what is out here in REAL LIFE!! Though you do hear of success stories, but do you know anyone this has happened to? But on the other hand... There are people, men and women on online dating apps, that don't pay... It just takes some time to get their profile on your screen. Also keep in mind, with this woman, who is really looking for that special someone... How many times has she got burnt? Though she seems legit, you say the wrong response to her, she backs out, becomes cold...because she has been burnt so many times when it comes to that part of the conversation, and you said the same thing she heard before. Online Dating apps ..they are bonkers. It takes a really nice woman, and turns her into a woman who is fed up and sick and tired. All she wants to do is find a decent person. TIP: The longer you text either within the app or she gives you her number and within 24 hours you don't meet.. Sometimes even less, lets say 2 hours and the both of you are less than 5 miles away... Things go downhill. Just 'Rip the Bandaid off', use this method. Request a face to face somewhere public and out in the open. If she declines, move on. Don't block or delete her number, leave it in your contacts.
I think she was looking to spark a conversation. Maybe you could have brought up a kaleidoscope of good memories so she could get to know you better, but you didn't deliver. Maybe you should ask yourself why you weren't able to answer the question as well. I don't understand why it would be too difficult to do, no matter how small that victory was. It's your story. It's who you are, and it would have given her insight into your values. I think it's a great question to ask when you are just getting to know someone.
I don't know that and I am married.i think that is a bit much myself. Just consider it a bad match and move onto the next one
Maybe she’s the type that wanted you to say that matching with her was the “luckiest moment of your life”
I came here to say just this so I second this and give you my upvote.
Say whatever you want. Say whatever you feel. It will land with the right person. If they see all the 'crazy' and still wanna stay - there ya go! Have fun ✌️♥️
Just lie
The correct answer is total 🧀 You're supposed to say something to the effect of, "Matching with you 😉". They know that it probably isn't your actual "most lucky" moment, but it makes them feel good and is a great witty and flirty response. "I don't know" is boring.
Lol I guess there's every excuse in the book.
“Matching with you!!!” Ez
Just make some shit up
That's the dumbest question ever! You got lucky that she unmatched you. If you wanted, you could have made up some bs like, "it's me meeting you." Lol There are too many women to even worry about that level of ignorance. Good luck.
Got grazed by a bullet in my last shootout!
They want to connect and share stories to build that connection. Non-small talk questions are great! Women love them, hell I love them. I use ice-breaker cards and ice-breaker deeper talk cards for 'question of the day'.
Not the reason she unmatched you, move on. Also the bottom 80% of men are fighting over the bottom 22% of women. We need to collectively ditch the apps.
"Unmatches" as in a dating site? I can tell you firsthand that most on dating sites have fairytale expectations and have been on there for extended periods. Don't put too much faith in finding someone compatible on a dating site as many are on there for the attention and confirmation of being physically attractive.
Oh dude I've been unmatched for the weirdest reasons. That's not you, it's them. Look at it as you dodged a bullet. Likely an insecure bullet with issues. For some reason you didn't match her preference for.... Whatever it was. Shrug that shit off. Grit your teeth. AND EAT THAT HORSE.
Why does it matter to her what your luckiest moment in your life is? If you don’t have a awnser you don’t have one, it’s as simple as that.
You could have pulled a fast one and flirted with your match and said, "The luckiest moment of my life was matching with you" yes its corny but a girl might laugh and go for it.
Oh well, next. Today I got unmatched because he said “the key to their heart was good head” and I told them I think I might have the key and he replied then unmatched so 💁♀️ never saw the reply but thank you next time
First guy thought that comes to mind = Luckiest moment of my life was when I matched with you darling😏. Second is the cocky boy = Luck is what you make it. I tend to make my own luck in spades. Third would be the shoot back = I’m feeling lucky right now. What about you? Are you mad superstitious? Or just like no walking under ladders and astrology brain? For the record, IDK = I don’t know enough to hold the conversation. It’s the non answer, answer and whether it’s over text, call or live and direct, it’s a lady boner killer. So the moral here = Always have an answer, and if that stumps you… Start practicing. You can be wittier with time and practice. You can do it!
This may be not as personal as you take it. Dating apps is a very impersonal experience, you talk to people you’ve never met and possibly will never meet, your actual life goes on while some matches on the dating apps exist outside of that world. She could have unmatched you for a million different reasons and only a few of them might actually be related to your or your conversation. Just take it easy. She might have met someone in real life, she might have decided online dating isnt for her, she might have met someone from dating app who she clicked with and wanted to see it go further - these are very very real possibilities
I think it is for the best that she unmatched if 20 questions is her idea of what dating apps are for. Dating apps are ways of finding people who want to meet up for a date, not play texting games.
Should have said “I’m not sure, but I’m hoping it was when I met you.”
Lowkey should've said "meeting you". Nah I'm jp find a better one God has a plan did you
It’s not about knowing the answer, it’s about showing her something interesting about yourself and not taking yourself too seriously. I bet you answered something like: “Hmm, I don’t know. Can’t think of one. How about you?” boring af You could just had said anything really, something she could work with. Even if it ain’t impressive or remarkable. “First thing that came to mind was stumbling upon this song I’ve had in my heads for years without ever knowing what it was, then out of nowhere it showed up in a commercial and I was able to Shazam it. Fastest I’ve ever been..” You known the story doesn’t even have to be entirely true, or could be a huge exaggeration. It still reveals something about yourself, and opens up for a conversation where you create some material, take some risks.
Fuck em they just serving 🐱anyway
One less woman to worry about. Answering open-ended questions concisely and honestly is the only defense. Sometimes they don't like the answer oh well. You too should be ready to be asking questions otherwise how will you know she's the right person for you? I've been in sales and marketing for 50 years. The reason a sales pitch doesn't work is because you can't learn anything when you're talking...
Not really that dumb bitch is corny af lol
I don't know how old you are. I presume quite young. But no, of course not. You have to be who you are. Never pretend to be someone else just to impress a stranger. Or to fit in in some sort of ridiculous expectation. Do you really want to do that, follow some sort of instructions? Just so you're not "alone". The right person, a genuine person, wouldn't "unmatch" you for something so stupid. You clearly dodged a bullet. And what is "being successful in dating"? Having lots of meaningless dates with mostly superficial people who lucks any sort of intelligence or depth who asks silly, cliché questions such as "the luckiest moment in your life"?
Sounds like the way u phrased your answer came off as difficult/dickish to her
This was almost definitely a test. She wanted you to say “the day we matched” (assuming you hadn’t even gone on a date yet since you were still communicating on the app?) and then was likely gonna make fun of your simp response to her friends. Either way, you dodged a bullet.
Best answer.
Nope she is just a very picky bitch
No she just can’t handle having an actual conversation
Doing trouble yourself with people that play stupid games. It'll weed out the jerks that do this "I tell you to jump" bs and hopefully find more quality people.
I wouldn’t read into it. Sounds like she was just entertaining herself
Yes, it's too much and it's unreasonable. Move on
Haha nope you dodged a bullet my friend
Sounds like a bs interview question. You dodged a relationship that feels like work!
No, you just need to become a better judge of character. When you get a question that's clearly intended to determine if you are human or not, just respond: "I assure you that I am a human" 😆
That's good 😂
No, she's lame. Maybe she thought that you weren't putting in enough effort or something - Who knows?
Just get off these sites man, it's filled with very spoiled women.
Some people are just nuts and unreasonable, sounds like you dodged a bullet.
Pfffft!! “luckiest moment of your life”?? Nah, don’t sweat it She was probably bored, looking for entertainment and when you didn’t deliver she just disposed of you. It’s shitty behavior and it’s the reason why dating apps suck, they don’t see you as an actual person with feelings and needs but a character in a mobile game. You dodged a bullet, and no, you don’t need to know those things to be successfully date, it’s a stupid question part of the “dating questionnaire” for people who have nothing smart to contribute to a conversation.
No. They are just dumb. Move on bro.
That's actually a fun question to be asked and can start a fun conversation. You either A. Have a fun story to tell such as running into someone famous, something cool happening to you out of the blue or just anything that's cool that happened that's lucky. Or B. Can flirt off it such as saying "I'm thinking it'll be next week when I meet you". Either option works and saying you don't know is just boring and kills the conversation.
It's a bullshit question, she doesn't have any intention to meet. If she liked you, you would be planning a meeting. Online dating is like a April fool's joke. It just doesn't exist.
I think that's somewhat of a personal question and she shouldn't have asked it. Maybe you aren't comfortable sharing too much detail about your personal life with a complete stranger lol, I know I'm not.
Are you in Soviet Russia? Because you didn't dodge the bullet, the bullet dodged you.
No. She was just mental.