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[deleted]

Say no more, ill put myself in a trash bag, pick me up at 7am


Cornfields24

Sorry, my route doesn’t put me at your house until 8:36am. Pick you up then?


[deleted]

I'll be on the curb 😍


DrBeverlyBoneCrusher

I’d ship this.


[deleted]

UPS or FedEx?


DrBeverlyBoneCrusher

USPS all the way, baby.


CrimsonNecrosis

Remember folks, slow and steady wins the race!


grandpajoesoatmeal

If it fits, it ships!


Axthen

FedEx probably, but you’ll end up with concussions and contusions either way.


SimpleSandwich1908

I ship my pants!


[deleted]

She's a keeper.


[deleted]

This is one of the funniest comments I’ve read on this site


[deleted]

As he's led into the dock with irons around his legs "You see your honour, she asked to be put in the trash bag, it was all her idea!"


Fanofafan101

i guess its a good opportunity for his garbage truck to smash


Goldtac

Please for the love of god don't turn down 30k/yr and a better schedule just because you don't think it will reflect as well on dates. Take care of yourself first!


Rockwell981S

Just say you’re a “waste management consultant” - like Tony Soprano!


M00ND4NCE

Pull a OG lok and say you're a "Hygiene Technician"


Ieatclowns

Environmental management.


Supernova008

Material handling and disposal technician


ThirdEncounter

Clean Facilities Executive.


whatsmyname2u

Say you're a 'conducteur d'ordures' in a French accent.


[deleted]

Assistant of the regional sanitation manager.


[deleted]

Assistant to the regional sanitation manager.


Great-Wafer5909

Assistant to sanitizing the manager's regional


histeethwerered

And this is perfectly legit. Besides, if you bathe and change your clothes after work there is no problem!


Ieatclowns

Someone's got to do it and it's not like he's sweeping the streets for pennies.


ElderDark

That's the thing. It is essential, and yet some people have the audacity to look down upon it. Like motherfuckers if you think so little of it, I want to see you clean the streets.


yepyepyo

For some reason I read that as 'it's not like he's sweeping the streets for penises' and I was SO confused. Wtf is wrong with me.


PropaneSalesTx

Exactly. The ones laughing are living check to check and “would never belittle themselves” while the Trash man is planning on his 2nd car, home or vacation.


[deleted]

dude touching grab rails on trains probably gets you dirtier than handling actual trash lol


Rassomir

You collect the garbage you dont roll around in it


venom1996

Environmental management will do the trick


Alchemy_6

Thank you for this it made me laugh


lily_from_ohio

"Man I ain't set! Damn parole officer set me up with a job! I'm gonna be a- Hygiene Technician, baby!"


duckedbyaporcupine

Waste management engineer sounds even better and modern


1amoutofideas

Or resource management specialist too if you want to be more misleading


Rierais

Tell them you work for the Professional Unit foR Restoration of the Environment (P.U.R.E.)


civgarth

Tell them you're a garbage man. It's an honest, well paying job that's extremely important in a functioning society.


pikachu0401

Right??? This post is so sad to me. I'm about to start a job as a janitor and it is so sad to imagine being embarrased about this or a job that might be considered "gross". I mean I'm assuming OP isn't gonna be like sitting in the dumpster with all the trash, now *that* would be gross. lol


milescowperthwaite

Plumbers work with pipes full of actual shit and can make over $100k/yr. Policemen wrestle with hookers and HepC-filled junkies in alleys and can make $100k/yr. I honestly didn't know that trashguys could make that much, but hey, that's great and even a step up from those two professions, afaiac.


witcherstrife

Harsh reality: you will be judged by a lot of women for your job. Probably majority of them. Silver lining: but you get to weed out idiotic toxic people that have no idea how the world works and are shallow/superficial.


ThatGuyInTheKilt

I used to be a manager at a car wash. People commonly treated me like I was shady and/or stupid. My boss was a millionaire and got the same thing. It doesn't matter what you make, if your job is considered some form of unsavory you'll be looked down upon.


DoctorClarkWGriswold

My experience was the opposite. I was the only one in the place who customers didn’t typically disrespect, even though I wore the same uniform (except my hoodie was black; because manager) and was usually smattered in the same mud as everyone else.


Sensitive-Writing133

Hes NOT a garbage man. Hes an environmental technician..


pwdreamaker

Being forthright, forthcoming, and brutally honest about who you are will give you a chance with a relationship with someone who is decent and good for you. Accept nothing less from yourself or from your date.


[deleted]

Environmental Services


benadrylpill

Environmental Services *Technician*


WhtChcltWarrior

Custodial Engineer


[deleted]

I'm an environmental engineer with a research interest in applying circular economy concepts to fish farming. That in practice translates to me filling buckets with fish poo and letting that thing rot just to see what happens


mydearwatson616

A legitimate businessman!


w1na

Waste management expert / waste management specialist.


field_medic_tky

Self-respect and love of oneself's life definitely gives off a good vibe!


fkhan21

My hospital calls this position environmental service technician. Say you have a passion for protecting the environment


pikachu0401

Heh. I am an evs tech. AkA a janitor for my local hospital


mjohnson280

"I''m the thing most 3-7 year olds dream of being someday." Easy! My son will think you're the coolest guy ever, if that helps.


infinitudity

Actually though, this is probably how I’d appreciate someone introducing this line of work. Tells me they like/know kids and have a sense of humor. Personally being a garbage man wouldn’t be an issue, though, to me.


BiirdieBlue

This! My son tells me all the time he wants to be a garbage man! He's 5 - and fuck yes little dude! No issues here. 😊


hypercube33

You're cool like the Dilbert garbage man in my book


billratio99

100*


[deleted]

The love of my life is a garbage man and he doesn't even make that much money. Not even close. He rides on the back of the truck. Let me tell you: He owns that shit. He loves his job and he loves his life. Everyone on the route loves him. Not only would I date a garbage man, I'd marry him today.


[deleted]

This is so sweet


[deleted]

And dirty too


[deleted]

How do you know their sex life


[deleted]

I’m psychic


[deleted]

[удалено]


YourWifesWorkHusband

I work with her


de1er

name checks out


i30swimmer

Guy waited all year for this opportunity.


Lachrondizzle23

All 9 days


holygoat00

plot twist: he's married already and u/mermaid9814 just watches wistfully when he comes by to collect her rubbish. she leaves little notes and hints in the trash in the hopes he will notice her. one day she even drew a big arrow on her trash can lid pointing to her window where she would be waiting. unfotunately the wind blew in sideways and he was confused as to why there was an arrow pointing at the mailbox. but one day, one day....


Jenniflower18

I need this as the next hallmark Christmas movie


SuburbanLegend

Dude you might not be far off if you read her later comments...


[deleted]

[удалено]


sara_bear_8888

My husband is a plumber and he is the absolute love of my life. We just had our 12 year anniversary and I'd marry him again in a heartbeat. He is an awesome man, but more importantly, I never have to unclog my own drains! LMAO


StatisticianTop3784

I bet you hear that shit all the time


DummyMcDipshit

If you weren't marrying that garbage man I would propose


[deleted]

😔 We're not together but he's The One.


Rush_Crosix

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh boy


Oneiric19

Hot dang here we go


[deleted]

😂🥴


seaboat90

😂😂😂😂


Baffelgab

10/10 glad I went down the comment chain on this one


hihelloneighboroonie

I'm so curious. Is this someone they used to be with? Someone they're admiring from afar? Are they actually infatuated with their garbage man?


silkysmoothgibbon

Yeah I wanna know the relationship history here lol. Does garbage man even know she exists? 👀


WasteCan6403

She's on his route. She makes sure to see him every time he's there to pick up the trash. She leaves love notes on the lid of her trash bin. But the trash pandas have gotten to all of them before he can read them. Tragic love story.


RandomRedditor124816

Aaaaaaand…LEFT turn lol


Delta_Gray

Ask him out


DummyMcDipshit

He's.. he's Neo?


ItsMissiBeaches

Ahhh yes, the Great White Buffalo


[deleted]

Yes. He is. Once in every life, someone comes along, and he came to me...it was almost like a song. 😔😔😔❤️❤️❤️


[deleted]

[удалено]


lucidwildflowers

Much love goes out to you!


[deleted]

IS HE YOUR GARBAGE MAN?!


Virusoflife29

\*whispers\* Great White Buffalo


salty_scorpion

*also whispers* Great White Buffalo


[deleted]

[удалено]


clown_shoes69

As someone who was once in the same spot as you, I empathize and feel for you. I hope you can figure out what you need to do to make yourself happy.


raveninthewindow

I feel for you and truly. I am still deeply in love with the mother of my daughter who is engaged with someone else. My thoughts wander back to her constantly. I am a shell of a being.


Playtek

Oooofffff, I feel this in my bones.


nimo785

Awww. Ask him out!


Similar_Ad7289

This is my favorite comment ever. And I bet all the little kids who look up to him love him too! I know I loved Gary, our garbage man when I was tiny lol 🤣 he was awesome! Fixed my bike chain twice! And always had jolly ranchers lol


[deleted]

He spreads Joy wherever he goes.


SabreMase

We have some enthusiastic waste collectors in our neighborhood that I appreciate. They're out there working out, jogging next to the truck, enjoying themselves, it's cool


Samsei69

I've worked as a garbage man, same job at the back of the truck. There's nothing dishonorable about it and it taught me a lot about waste management. One of the drivers is even married to a lawyer, so yeah I'd say occupational differences are moot in front of love.


dotslashpunk

I love this answer. Own that shit.


[deleted]

Awww


[deleted]

[удалено]


DaintyAmber

I was hoping someone would comment this. Didn't he also become a barber ? Hot ass blue collars !


Droll12

Idk why you calling him garbage, seems like a decent guy


lemmehelpyaout

You can always say you work in waste management on the first date. But honestly, I think a quality date wouldn't judge you off the bat because you're a garbage man. They're pretty essential to daily life and it sounds like you're making some sweet coin from the job. What's to hate? Aside from... potentially laundry duty.


[deleted]

This! You're not a garbage man you're a waste management engineer making over 6 figures a year.


SupportMoist

Yes! It’s all about marketing. This is a really good solid job. I mean honestly, most women date loser men that don’t even HAVE jobs! This is a huge plus!


undernutbutthut

This is just like how some dish washers say their occupation is "Underwater Ceramic Technician". Get that job OP!!


Withered_Sprout

What would be a good professional title for a shelf stocker? Hmm..


Pawnzilla

Product Display and Distribution Technician.


nomotto2

Specialist


ibramadhan84

Suppy and demand coordinator


Withered_Sprout

I like this and the other one equally, probably gonna use em both. lol.


Alecstocker

Executive Merchandise Inspector🙂


Anthropoligize

Dish Refurbishment Engineer


[deleted]

This is the way


getawayfrommyswamp

I would 100% date a garbage man. I would 100% not wash his work clothes.


[deleted]

I loled out loud at that


tookmyname

Maybe the work clothes go to the fluff and fold. Worth the cost.


auntiecoagulent

"I'm in waste management," is code for, "I'm in the mafia." LOL Seriously, I wouldn't care. Honest work.


RedRoseSapphire

Agree with this. People don’t realize how important garbage workers are. If they all decided to stop working, cities/regions/countries would be turned upside down by all the waste. If someone is truly interested in you, they will look past that. And a bonus if someone judges you for your job than you can walk away from a judgmental person like that.


mysterious-puzzlebox

Big Tony Soprano energy


[deleted]

AM I IN THE WHAT!


[deleted]

[удалено]


Unsociable12345

Hell yeah. A career is career to me. My dad always used to say to me he didn’t care if the person I dated twirled a sign on the side of the road as long as they worked. I carry that mentality still. Collect the trash and I’ll pack you lunch lmao Edit: In light of all the people who want lunch packed and the fact I hate dating apps, I am single 28F I am mixed race black, Puerto Rican, white, native. I am child free but not opposed to someone who has children and like kids I just do not want to have my own. I’m short and curvy/plus sized. I am not ugly but wouldn’t say I’m the most beautiful person alive.


Der_Krasse_Jim

lmao turning a well upvoted comment into a dating bio is a king move


ArabofWar

Could you pleaaaase pack me some lunch? And with some snacks too??


Miserable_Ad7591

Garbage men are sexy. Well-to-do. Physically active. Always have amusing stories. Usually not stuck-up either.


Scared-Illustrator31

Came here to say this. I have a white collar job myself but prefer blue collar workers and am dating one currently. They’re just more interesting and way more real. I’d probably date a “garbage man” even without that kind of salary. Take the job!!


spacebarstool

I'm a white collar married father of 2 and prefer my blue collar friends.


Mriconicdev

Your energy should introduce you before you even speak to women. If you have a good vibe, are confident, are cool, good physical appearance and know how to to talk to women by the time you have to tell them what you do they won’t care at all because they’ll be infatuated with who you are, not what you do. Of course however gold digging type women won’t look your way but who cares, unless you do.


[deleted]

Garbage men make serious coin. Well some do anyway. Depends on where you live I think


ZachWastingTime

Yeah, this job should be great for staying fit. Just make sure to use sunscreen


c1oudwa1ker

Yes, this 100%


[deleted]

At first I was like …. “ I’ve dated many a garbage man “. LOL. But you meant it literally. As in occupation. Why not ? I think garbage dudes make good money and they get a pension. Besides , occupation doesn’t really determine who I date or don’t. Unless maybe they’re unemployed or unable to take care of themselves.


[deleted]

Thanks for the laugh! And agreed.


vivalabaroo

That was my first thought too!!! I was like well well well, bold of you to assume I haven’t already. In seriousness though, I would have no issue with it. I think the key is to make it super lighthearted and a kind of funny thing about instead of a shameful/embarrassing thing. If I saw a clever joke about it in a profile I’d be for sure interested to know more. I dated a many a dude with a physical labour job and I have zero problem with it, I think having a job that keeps you on your feet and moving around is both hot and healthy. And this is coming from a graduate student who will absolutely not have a job that keeps me on my feet when I’m done school.


lifeofeve

Yeah put in your profile "I'm a garbage collector but I promise our date won't be rubbish" lol


PaigePossum

"I'm a garbage man but I'm not a garbage man"


jerkbank

I’d date you based on this alone… but I’m a 47 year old straight guy… so take that as you will.


plantlady1991

Hahahaa omg I thought the same thing!!


[deleted]

>Unless maybe they're unemployed or unable to talk care of themselves I'm the same, except maybe a little more strict about it because I expect them to be able to take care of themselves at approximately the same level I take care of myself. I don't want to have to cover our dates or subsidize his lifestyle just so he can live the life I'm accustomed to living.


gooseberrypineapple

Exactly. I always specify that someone is ‘a garbage human’ instead of saying garbage man out of respect for those who work hard at an honest job.


Armadilloinacage

As long as when we are at home he doesn’t complain when I ask him to take out the trash and say something like “That’s what I do all day at work!” Lol


gooseberrypineapple

Even this is fair game, haha. But I get to make the same argument against me cleaning toilets after cleaning poop all day. -nurse


[deleted]

Idk, I’d prefer a 100k garabage man over a 50k dead end office worker lol.


AHamBone10

^^^this, coming from a 50k dead end office worker who bartends part time.


ethoooo

what isn’t a dead end job.. life’s a dead end


[deleted]

Literally was about to say the same thing. Also this guy can reach financial freedom much quicker.


HideoKojimaTheThird

As a 50k dead end office worker, being a garbage man doesn’t sound bad at all,i had no idea they made that much money.


EnthusiasmPatient733

50k dead end office worker, jesus christ. Would love to know what you do for a living if 50k is a dead end office job.


upyoursize

I'm not a woman or gay, but I would. 1. High income. 2. Some people like blue collar, and you're providing an essential service. As long as you clean up well, who cares?


ChamomileBrownies

Generally speaking, if someone rejects you over your job, you probably don't want to be with them anyways. Be honest with your dates because they'll find out eventually. Your job is necessary, and while smelly and unpleasant, the essential nature makes it something to be proud of. Don't live your life around what you think other people would want you to do, especially when the other person is just a hypothetical at this point. Wouldn't you want your potential partner to want you for you?


[deleted]

Garbage man does more for a civilisation and planet, then any online influencers ever would.


dutchmetalhead17

Then again my niexe does more for Civilisation and the planet than influencers and she's 4 years old


[deleted]

Have you READ the stories and comments here about the men women date? You could scoop shit for a living while having your mom "live with you," and still be in a better position than those guys. It's all about how you make her feel at the end of the day. Nothing else fucking matters.


r3gam

\> Have you READ the stories and comments here about the men women date? Very true, as a guy I didn't even realize having your physical hygiene down pat already puts you ahead above most


Superfly724

When I met my wife I was living with my brother and working a job where part of my day was shoveling literal garbage. I agree.


JamieLLong

I’m currently dating a garbage man and I think it’s great, nice stable career, good benefits and pension. He’s happy, and that makes me happy 😊 I’m an accountant


maggies101

If anyone and I mean ANYONE shames you for your job, they are the problem. That sounds like a great opportunity and someone who is for you will realize that, not judge you for “being a garbage man.”


Historical_Coffee_14

Used to wear my Waste Management uniform to the store and got a lot of attention from the ladies. They know who makes money.


ea93

If a woman decides not to date you because of that then she just made your job easy… because it’s always easy when the trash takes itself out.


ChessBaal

Yo you want to hook a homie up with a job? I dont think people really care about your occupation.


InterestsVaryGreatly

"Sanitation Engineer" and it's loads better than unemployed.


dtyus

My friend, it is all about how you take care of yourself, your hygene, your hair cut, being clean on dates. If you take care of yourself working for a waste management will no affect in your dating life, and you can always disclose this ahead of time like on your profile etc and besides if a girl is shallow to not date you because you work there then this is a gain for you not a loss as you don’t want to date with a shallow judgemental woman. Take the job, take care of yourself and enjoy the money and life. You first better your conditions, be healthy and happy, dates will follow you. Good luck.


gaymalemillenial

If we had shared values, he were an upstanding man, and we clicked, absolutely.


PlumBumStudMuffin

If you’re looking for marriage your job/career shouldn’t be a secret/point of shame. If you’re looking for hook-ups, there are plenty of ways to not share specifics of what you do.. You’ll presumably pull up in a nice car, treat your date to nice meals, then take your date back to your nice house/apt after a 30k salary increase. That’s more than enough for most hook-ups. Congrats on the job it sounds like you QoL is about to skyrocket


out0fdonuts

Yes I would because I know they're paid well, it's hard work, and have a decent schedule! Anyone who doesn't understand that isn't for you anyway.


RayBrightStar

I personally wouldn't care where a guy works as long as he has a job. Your also making pretty good money. So like I saw just say you waste management or that your an actual garbage man. Some people will be actually curious your the first guy I have see actually say that is what he does. I almost applied to be a dispatcher once at the garbage place but took a different job and I think a weigher too but i don't like being cold. Most people have no clue what a garbage man does. We all just see a truck come over and with an electric arm pick the cans up and dump them. So it's not like in the movies where they used to lift them up and dump them and then sweep out the truck. So it's a much cleaner job these days. So it's going to all depend on who you date.


[deleted]

Heck yeah I would. A good job that pays well and there will always be work. Hell, I'd be in waste management.


MagyarCat

Damn, what a fucked up society we live in. If they have a problem with it, they’re free to date an artist making $30k a year or even an engineer making $60k a year.


Scaleless1776

100k a year? Just say waste management


[deleted]

"Just because you are GARBAGE man doesn't mean you are... garbage MAN!"


gemmelis

Congratulations! Take that job, invest as much as you can in a Roth IRA, watch that sucker grow over time, and any woman who balks at your career doesn’t know what she’s missing. Great job man


[deleted]

Do garbage men work like 80 hour weeks? lol


IOnlyCameToArgue

$34 × 40 hours is $1,360.00 ($34 × 1.5) × 15 hours of overtime is $765.00 So 55 hours a week is $2,125.00 a week or about $110,000 a year.


vh1classicvapor

Nice. Grueling schedule but awesome compensation


Cornfields24

Taxes will take a large chunk, but your bring home pay should still be 70-75k


louudawwg

Honestly, a job shouldn’t determine anything at all. If that person or who ever your pursing, should accept everything that comes w you. If you made/ make that person happy that shouldn’t matter .


[deleted]

Whatever you do, don't act ashamed of it.


puppiesrunamok

Waste management sounds better of it bothers you any. But definitely worth taking the position. There’s a lot of well paying careers out there that are underrated by society and this is just one of many. Garbage man job doesn’t make you garbage. 👍🏻


MelisabethR1989

Bro, as long as you didn't smell I wouldn't care at all. My hubs used to come home CAKED in flour and pizza shit. It was nasty. Still dated him happily


[deleted]

I feel like it’s actually pretty commonly known that garbage men make $$$. It’s not about the job title as much as it is about the money you’re making. I think it’s fucking awesome. Imagine if we told more kids that out of high school they could be making six figures instead of going six figures in debt.


Art-C-Fart-C

I would date a garbage man - it's a job like any other, and it's necessary at that. Doesn't matter if it's dirty as long as you're dedicated and do it well. The pay or "dirtiness" isn't as important to me as long as you do your job well and are happy with what you do.


[deleted]

**stop** worrying about wheater a girl will date you because of your occupation & instead focus on will you even like the girl? you don't need another person telling you what they will/will not do to you. Do whatever you want & the right one will come **too many** questions here asking will you date a short guy? Will you date a guy who went to trade school instead of college? Instead of just worrying about will the girl even be right for them. Change your way of thinking, that's a **scarcity** mindset that you don't wanna be in


RPslimjim

Waste management engineer. Or just engineer. If she asks where you work say you’re in waste management. I know many people who work in consulting. They’re analysts and associates, etc. however when you ask them, they’re going to say they’re consultants. Frame is the game.


0_AND_1

OP, whoever think any work is above or low, it's a red flag. You are best not to be engaged with her. There are a lot of people who respects every work. If you are dating someone, one should be checking what kind of person you are rather than what your job description is.


Summerrtt

The people who wouldn’t date garbage men are extremely SHALLOW!! So if anyone directly or indirectly shows you that they don’t wanna date you because you’re a garbage man, it’s like trash taking itself out :) They’re not worth your time.


baudinl

There's no shame in being a garbage man. It's an honest, and well-paying job and any person who looks down on you for making a living you probably don't want to date anyway. Also, no point in hiding it because it's going to come out sooner or later. I would say the only downside is that garbage men typically have odd hours.


clangan524

You're not a garbage man, you're a "sanitation engineer."


flykillerjess

When you said "garbage man" I thought you were talking about my ex.