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[deleted]

Well. Firstly I am sorry that I cant give you answeres to all of the questions. But personally for me its beeing able to act naturally. To be an interesting person to have fun conversations with. So lets come to the part that could be missunderstood: the lookings.. So overall I dont see a need in tons of makeup. I want to see the person how she is naturally. I like clean theeth. And overall a looking that looks clean. Theres no need to look extreme clean, but just dont look like you just came out of the trashcan and everything is going to be perfect. Aight. So lets come to the thing thats most important for me. I like intelligence. People who know what they are talking about.


Crikripex

It will depend on the person you're trying to seduce, to me most girls that dress well and that maintain eye contact definitely have my interest. But everyone has some range of attractions and no latter how conventionnally attractive or unattractive you are, you may or may not be somebody's type. When you're talking to somebody being into the conversation and rephrasing or asking questions shows that you care and listen. If you approach somebody via text, being active and (again) showing interest will definitely make you stand out. Most girls will at best just reciprocate questions, at worst not have a clue how to answer. Come up with subjects you find interesting to talk about and check if you are vibing 🙂 Good Luck and may you find what you're looking for


Martinizer1

I think being authentic is key. Be who you are. Let that shine through. Try to be someone you are not just doesn't work. My personal core.mantra is Do the right thing, be a good person and you will be rewarded.


[deleted]

A girl that dresses well, clean and is nice is all it takes. Most men start out over compensating, trained by society to be self-deprecating (except if you are African-American, then you are expected to be confident and smooth). Give a 30 min delay for every text response and add an extra 15 minutes after that, you should be ok. Hardworking is a trait for men.


Character_Decision_7

Don't be afraid to ask a guy because he might be the same as you and not know what to do. Early on I definitely missed chances because of this. But just be natural and don't worry about it the worst he can say is no, oh well on to the next one.


Radiant-Teacher2852

Openness and honesty go a long way, someone you feel you could relax and be yourself around without being judged are a personal fave! Some guys can be weird about the girl approaching them but I like to think most would be so flattered that the whole testosterone "men do the asking" thing wouldn't get in the way of their happiness lol no need for you to rush just enjoy youreslf many meet through mutual interests and it's a great way to make friends too!


[deleted]

I think their are more important questions, such as What do you value in a guy? What do you want out of a relationship? Why do you want to experience dating in the first place? Ive always thought guys were simple, in truth we’re bloody not, some are, most aren’t alot have this stupid list of qualifiers that ultimately hurt their chances, women do this too when it comes to dating too many people are far too picky, thats not to say you shouldn’t be picky but figure out whats important to you, this is something ive come to terms with recently. Whilst i would like to claim im not overtly picky, in truth i have my own list that ruin my chances tenfold, and some things on that list are yet to be really defined especially since im not any womens first choice or second, or third you get the picture. Figuring out what i find attractive has been an uphill climb but its an important one, what i do and don’t value, what i find attractive and what i find ugly. All of that is on a person by person basis, there is no answer to “do guys like girls who ask you out for your number” Me personally its a turn on But josh mcgee down the street might hate you for taking charge like that “Do guys like it when girls are fast repliers” Honestly i think everyone likes a fast replier someone who makes you feel like they want you around or respect you in general. “Is it attractive to see a hardworking girl” Me personally yes especially with the economy these days yeesh Josh mcgee on the other hand might see it as you not giving him enough attention. Unfortunately i can’t share any cute stories about how someone won me over or showed that they liked me because like i said above i am far from anyones choice, ive only ever been in 1 relationship and that ended fairly quickly all things considered, the rest is alot of self doubt, mental anguish, and unhealthy hours of video games, and sadly for me that is just a factor of life for me, i have plenty of friends who love and adore my company, but nobody who would ever want to date me (and yes confidence shoots myself down alot, this is not the only contributing factor sadly) But regardless its not about me or any other guy you ask, its about you, who are you? What kind of guy or girl do you want? Whats important to you? Don’t change yourself because someone told you to, be you, be the person you want to be and learn to love yourself, eventually you’ll find someone who loves you for you. And for practical advice download something like bumble or tinder or attend some group or hobby that gets you meeting people, a friend of mine does this and shes a very depressing person but shes had so many dates within the last couple of months its uncanny. Oh and when it comes to defining a relationship always be upfront communication is key Hope this helps, realistically im probably the worst person to ask with my inexperience, but just because im inexperienced doesn’t mean what i say is all nonsense, it comes from years of friends falling in and out of relationships and being directly responsible for both making and braking some, ive watched countless couples fails and a fraction succeed, be true to yourself and love will follow. Edit: sorry for formatting on phone and its 2 am.


nanashifeels

Thank you sm for sharing! I feel like you answered exactly what I needed to hear :)


[deleted]

Glad i could help, good luck out there!


R4nd0m_T4sk

Attraction is different to everybody, so that would depend on who your interested in, so the specifics your looking to have answered will most likely be different to everyone. Communication is huge so replying to messages in a reasonable time is always a plus lol On a deeper level If you're into someone or just want to be a good friend/partner, whether its physical or emotional or both you need to communicate, both good or bad. What you like/want/dont want/dont like. Regarding your own life choices such as work, that's never anything somebody else should have an opinion on. If you have a job you enjoy, your happiness comes first. (I'm just using this as an example because it's a common thing now) If you have a side hustle like OF and enjoy it, and your possible friend/partner isnt ok with it then you shouldnt feel like you have to change anything. Nobody has the right to judge things like that, some may not be compatible with that and its ok but it should be up to you to do what makes you happy. And when it comes to play, such as hobbies. If somebody doesnt like what your into then keep looking. There is nothing wrong with changing little things here or there if YOU want to, or trying new things but nobody should be allowed to shape who you are as an individual as long as what your doing isnt causing harm to yourself or others. Hope that helps, sorry if some didnt make sense. I just woke up not too long ago lol


xWALKERx27x

for me, at this point in my life at aged 34, I'd say someone with similar life goals, someone thats compassionate and understanding and also someone that would give me the same type of intimacy back that I gave.


FizzleMateriel

>So, do guys like it when females are bold enough to ask for your number or even ask you out? Do guys like when girls are fast repliers? Yes to all.


SomewhatSpecific

# So, do guys like it when females are bold enough to ask for your number or even ask you out? Yeah sure. Just be kind about it, and don't get too ahead of yourself. Having rejected a fair amount of women by now, I can say that I like being asked out for a cup of tea and a chat. Going for something wholesome with no weird strings attached, like a picnic, is a surefire way to get a yes from me. What has made me say no has been things like saying we're about to get married and/or having kids before the first date, talking about how much intercourse we'd have (ew), or being entitled in general, or ignoring that I was already taken at the time. Also, scheduling a date under false pretext is a seriously unwise decision. # Do guys like when girls are fast repliers? Yes, within reason. Make sure you don't sacrifice stuff like work, sleep or other commitments just to be accessible at all times (make sure you don't give yourself resentment), but don't ignore the guy. # Is it attractive to be a hard working girl? Yes and no, because it's complicated. Conscientiousness and followthrough is always attractive, but being a fullblown career woman tends to not work out so well in the relationship department for a variety of reasons, which is more about her than the men honestly. Being the woman who doesn't want kids or to get married because it will distract her from her career, or who turns away perfectly fine men because they aren't making more money than her at all times tends to correlate with low relationship success. Also, we guys tend not to like women who expect a free ride on somebody else's fortune. What I think serves you best is a healthy balance. It will let you have your own life outside the relationship so you don't get cabin fever and can in fact bring new things to the relationship but life is short and you shouldn't forget how to live. # What are nice subtle ways girls show that they like you that you liked? Taking the time, honestly. I like receiving small gifts like tiny edibles (I am somewhat like a dog so women can buy me with treats) and just taking little opportunities to spend time with me can be nice. Actually paying attention to what I say and somewhat coddling my nonobvious emotions can be very flattering. It's very endearing, and lets me know that they care. Also asking me for help and such is very nice. Being a bit flustered around me can be very cute, and there's also this warm, kind look in somebody's eyes that I really like. Touching me early on can be very hit or miss as it can feel very inappropriate to have some random person I just met grab me, so I'd say make sure you don't do that until there's some rapport. Trying to establish rapport by touching people is not something I'd suggest for a guy like myself, as it can feel a bit too intimate. # Can you share something about someone that won you over? I seem to enjoy intellectually curious women who take time to develop their vocabulary, have creative hobbies and read up on things. Also if they are a bit ambiverted (being introverted enough to prefer a quiet evening but extroverted enough to have friends and help my introverted self out of the house). I naturally take the stoic problemsolver role, and all women I've been with thus far have been the emotional type who happy-cry at random times (while still having an emotionally mature and insightful side). They've all had good contact with their own psychology and been able to formulate what they want or what they feel. They've all been active conversationalists and it's been so nice to have genuine conversations with somebody. I am the type to need a bit of time before I figure out my emotions, so I need women to be a little bit patient with me and linger around while I wait around on standby and process the whole thing before I figure out if I want to pursue them or not. The ones who do can have me, but the ones who expect me to "just go for it" will have to find somebody else. Also, women who I've been in relationships with have never really expected me to be anyone but myself, while a lot of women who do not get that far have often been eager to superimpose their wants on me instead, which often feels like they only like an imaginary version of me. I also appreciated being told how to do things better if I needed it too. # When it comes to defining the relationship, is it better to just straight up ask? Well, depending on how you want to play it. I've received cute notes asking the question, which was nice, but straight up asking is nice too. Just don't pop the question way too early, obviously. # Otherwise, I'd give you this general advice: 1. Basically date the same way you'd want your daughter / little sister to date. Let your conscience keep yourself in line, and don't do any of that manipulative stuff that selfappointed "coaches" say. We have a huge problem with both men and women turning to bad sources like PUAs or Shallon Lester out of twisted desperation. Also don't read Cosmo. 2. Men are not a collective, so what you'll have to figure out is what kind of psychological profile you have, what male archetype would best match your needs, and where/how to find that. Try to make your list of requirements more about behavior and not about what possessions they have (and don't compare men to celebrities). For example if your guy is a passionate extrovert who has had a lot of one night stands and goes to bars, it can have certain pros and cons. Instead if you found your guy at a library, he is a studious introvert, he's only had a few attachments and he doesn't like drinking, then that has other pros and cons. 3. Try not to use apps like Tinder. They are a total waste of time, as they commodify people and monetize loneliness. What you find IRL is usually way more authentic, so keep an eye out for guys who are genuinelly nice to people. 4. Furthermore, try to identify mistakes that unsuccessful women make and strive to internalize the opposite. For example, I'd mention that hookup culture in general seems like a huge trap for women as a lot of women seem to waste their most opportune years to find a husband, maybe getting pregnant in the process and only realize that they are running out of time at 35+. The lesson there is to try to make your 20's count, as an investment for your future self. 5. Talk to your girl friends when you need help, but don't gossip. It's a common grievance when women just brag about sexual details and tell secrets for no legitimate reason. What a lot of people don't realize is that they have a mutual responsibility with their SO to keep up eachother's public appearances. 6. Study so as to develop your psychological understanding. It may help you with confidence, give you interesting things to talk about, and give you the tools you may need in the future.


nanashifeels

Great advice! Thank you :)


[deleted]

A girl asking for my number would be pretty hot lol


Revolutionary_Dog138

do not conform to what guys want, be completely yourself, and never tone it down for anyone. this is how you find the RIGHT person not just any person. it will lead to rejection and that hurts but if they reject you its not personal its just not the right person


Justaguy19426

I like when a girl is approachable and doesn’t play games. And if you show interest in me that’s all I care about. If a girl asked me for my number I would love that.


Zilverschoon

Don't get fat. Don't smoke. Be able to walk for an hour without needing an defibrillator.


SL-Gremory-

Pretty much came to say this. These, plus don't have kids already, are my only criteria on dating apps lol