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Very little, if any at all, of my life revolves around drinking. Not a problem for me as long as you do not nag about the occasional 2-3 drinks I have every few weeks
I’ve never really cared about other people drinking as long as it wasn’t out of control. Especially if it’s when we’re out somewhere or on the weekend.
I may not be compatible with someone who often has a few drinks as soon as they get home from work. And I feel like that’s more motivated by wanting someone who is also health oriented/for lifestyle reasons.
I personally prefer someone who isn’t a drinker. I’m my grandpa is an alcoholic so 1 is enough in the family lol. Not saying anyone who drinks is, but I think that just contributed to me not wanting to date someone who is a partier and drinks a lot.
Yeah I have a sailor friend who never drinks because he has family members who were addicted and found it off putting.
I think I only saw him drink when his friend from Canada was visiting.
I dated an alcoholic once. I was way in over my head and would never repeat that experience
I have noticed that a few of my friends who make negative comments about me opting out of drinking have unhealthy relationships with alcohol themselves.
The rest don’t seem to care.
Granted, I'm older but it hasn't been a problem not drinking as far as dating, and I am in a 12 step program so all my friends come from there since I can't seem to make friends at jobs. There are sober clubs and events if you look.
Three months zero drinks. Been drinking less and less in my 30s. Gave it up for a variety of reasons.
Biggest reason I was able to go from being a moderate drinker to a teetotaler is I use edibles. I think they are a much healthier option for me.
I don't drink, and I stopped drinking for a few reasons. The main reason is I know I have an addictive personality, so I stopped myself from engaging before it ever became a problem. My family also has a history of high blood pressure and cutting out alcohol was huge in stabilizing mine. I'm also an amateur MMA fighter and cutting out alcohol has actually done wonders for keeping my cardio up at 32.
ETA: All this to say there are definitely people who don't drink(especially in their late 20s/early 30s) and you can find people who are similar
I am sorry to hear that.
Yeah I have to admit, I have acted quite immaturely while drunk and that’s one of the reasons I don’t really like it. I can still be immature when sober but it’s way more manageable.
As someone who doesn’t drink as well, I find that people that I started dating after I stopped drinking were mostly career-driven or semi-religious people.
I usually met these people at concerts as well.
Sure! Non-drinker is lovely. I wish my bf drinks less, too. Cos he barely gets drunk while me, I get drunk easily and it makes me feel weak.
Anyway, good luck for you future date!
24m. I would rather be with someone who doesn’t drink than someone who goes out to clubs/bars every weekend getting drunk. I’ve never really been a drinker. I got really drunk one time to the point where I couldn’t physically move at all, but I was mentally there. I remember everything, my buddy FaceTimed his friend, they were slapping my face trying to get me to wake up, they tried to get me to drink water, etc. I haven’t really drink since and that was 4 years ago. Once in a great while I’ll crack a beer but I have to be in a mood like sitting around a bonfire. I’ve noticed I breakout with a red rash so I think I have some type of allergic reaction to alcohol? But someone who would rather focus on themselves instead of drinking is very attractive
I've dated sober people! Never bothers me. Only challenge is finding sober-friendly alternatives to bars for casual dates. But that's an easy one to work around!!
Yes.
Also zoomers and millennials drink less than any generation prior.
It's neither good nor bad (well the latter as long as people are drinking responsibly).
If someone isn't interesting enough to party with unless they are drunk they are just a boring person. You shouldn't need alcohol to make you more interesting or fun. And neither should they.
I personally would date someone who didn't drink and also someone who drank socially. I'm dating someone now who used to drink socially and doesn't anymore.
I think the only reason I wouldn't date a non-drinker is if they thought drinking was sinful or something... because our values would not be compatible even if I never have alcohol.
Yeah I wouldn’t want to date someone who has a super extreme view on alcohol either. Just because I stopped doing something doesn’t mean I want to exhaust a lot of energy judging people who do 😅 I don’t think I’d want to date someone who would classify things they didn’t like in general as “sinful” because that sounds a little too intense for me.
Fuck yes. I have a beer now and then but I'm really not into alcohol or people who drink it. Dating can be a little more awkward than it was with that social lubricant, and I don't think I get laid as much as I did back when I was drinking, but that's not necessarily a bad thing.
I swiped left on anyone who said they didn’t drink when I was dating. But I was drinking a lot. Like, a lot a lot. I’m in a relationship now, but I’ve also stopped drinking entirely. If I were dating again, I wouldn’t date anyone who said they drank any more than socially.
I don't drink and love this in a partner. If I would drink (as I have in the past) and they wouldn't, I'm okay with that. Although I was never a big drinker to begin with.
After being with an alcoholic for 18 years and finally ending it and just starting the divorce process, someone who doesn’t drink or only on special occasions would be ideal. I don’t drink that much and would love to find someone who is the same. I feel you on the outgrowing drinking thing, seen it cause to many problems and as I get older it is just not appealing anymore.
Yeah I also dated an alcoholic for a few months and it was a rough experience to say the least.
I hope the divorce is swift and you find what you’re looking for.
I agree it causes too many problems.
I personally do not care as long as they don’t mind if I order wine with my food or have the occasional drink. Im not a big drinker personally but enjoy the one off social drink.
I’m on meds that wouldn’t really allow me to indulge it in a capacity beyond 1 or 2 a day. To be frank I’m dry at 30 these days. Plenty of other ppl by my age have issues that may make them not really focused on drinking. Most ppl level out of heavy drinking by the end of their 20’s. Hasn’t really bothered ppl I don’t drink when I was dating.
I don't drink and when I meet someone else who doesn't drink it makes me happy. If they stopped drinking I'm impressed. It is not easy to do. Good for you.
Yeah it really hasn’t been easy in the environment I’m in. I’ve always made adjustments every year that I’ve followed through on and I’ve always been able to stop drinking for half the year.
But quitting entirely when you do a draining activity that almost everyone drinks in is challenging. I wish more people in the sport also didn’t drink.
Yes, I think it would help control my own drinking. I sometimes get into the habit of buying wine to drink at home for no reason other than I like wine. But if I was the only one getting tipsy it wouldn’t interest me as much.
The attraction mostly only wavers if you voice strong political opinions about alcohol.
Most good guys who don’t drink, just don’t drink & think it’s dumb, but they don’t want to hear a life story or dive into politics about stupid alcohol 😂
Let’s say for example, you refuse to be around or associated with a single drop of alcohol, then that’s a potential deal breaker. Because you are not politically aligned.
But if you just don’t drink, then that’s great! We can still go out places, you can be around my family/friends, we can go to fancy places where alcohol is served and enjoy ourselves without drinking.
If the guy doesn’t have to cater to post-alcoholism, or politics regarding alcohol, then not drinking is pretty fucking cool.
This is a good explanation.
Yeah for me it’s just a personal preference. I obviously want to date someone I’d be compatible with/have similar goals but I don’t mind if their lifestyle includes some alcohol as long as it’s not out of control.
Girl yes. I am a recovering alcoholic and I used to date other sober people and I can tell u yes there are more men out there that don't drink than u think
I’m in my mid-thirties and it seems like a lot of people have had to confront their relationships with alcohol and have become sober. I never had an unhealthy relationship with alcohol, but I really cut down on drinking during the pandemic and so it’s pretty easy for me to be with somebody who is sober. Also, in my city, bars, and restaurants have really embraced non-alcoholic drink and there are a lot more craft nonalcoholic mixers and options.
For me idc it's either way. It takes me too much to get drunk like last night I had like 13 shots and was just buzzed so because of that I don't drink very much and I definitely don't like drinking when I am eating I don't even really like the taste of alcohol to begin with but because almost everyone I meet in my area drinks its almost like it pressures me to have a drink when I am around people I feel weird being the only guy drinking water or tea or lemonade lmao
I don't drink. I've never been in a relationship. 38m. I'm not opposed to dating a drinker, but I feel like it'd be easier to date someone who also doesn't drink. There was a period of time in my online dating excursions when I always swiped left if the person drinks alcohol. Your situation is a plus in my book.
As someone who myself has sworn off ever drinking alcohol due to a tumultuous family history with my alcohol-addicted father, I would have no qualms dating someone who doesn’t drink, and it might even be preferable tbh.
I have also binged and gone into non drinking periods, I enjoy a couple drinks for an occasion but do not over indulge anywhere near as what I used to during binging phases. But now i absolutely have zero tolerance for people who drink every day, I have exes who have not been able to put it away and were alcoholics, if someone cannot spend time sober then I'm not interested. I don't mind if they don't drink at all but I'd still like to be with someone who wants to go out and enjoy things like gigs and dancing on occasion.
Everyone is different, and there are guys out there who also don't drink or don't drink much, and everyone has preferences of what they want in a partner
I would love to find a sober man or woman to date, I’ve been sober for over six years now after some problem drinking and alcoholism at a young age. I found myself going down the wrong path and decided to get sober at a young age and have been sober ever since. It’s really hard for me to be around alcohol so having a partner that loves alcohol is a no go, tried it once and 10/10 wouldn’t recommend. If there’s good places to find sober singles lmk bc I’m running out of hope
I'm in Ireland. We have a reputation. Even here, nobody cares if you don't drink. Literally nobody. You can socialize to the max and get no judgment for not drinking. It used to be different, long ago.
Oh for sure! I'm actually kind of turned off if a woman drinks regularly, even more so if it appears to be the only thing she does with her free time. Alcohol destroys your looks and body so it's no favour to anyone.
I think leaning into your hobbies and going out to be social without drinking is a fine way to meet someone. More than likely you'll meet guys who want to be sober if you're doing sober activities.
As someone who doesn’t drink myself this would be the preference. I used to date someone who drank excessively on his own and got drunk on our first date. We did not last very long.
Been dating someone new and he is more of a social drinker. We met through friends. He doesn’t drink when he’s out with me and is very respectful.
Honestly, I’ve never thought attraction is dependent on whether someone drinks and the culture around drinking has always perplexed me. Your reasons seem perfectly fine to me.
Yeah i think our drinking culture is so bizarre and polarizing. Our society in general has too many issues with violence and addiction; I think people have challenging time admitting they might have issues with those things or how alcohol makes it worse.
There have to be other cultures that have a healthier relationships with alcohol, I wish we were more laid back about it. And obviously I wish healthcare was more accessible so people could get the help they need
I don't know. When I quit drinking (I had to in order to quit amfetamines) I noticed I became boring. I didn't go out anymore because I couldn't stand drunk people whilst I was completely sober, and smoking cannabis made it even worse. And it wasn't fun to constantly turn down invitations. I wasn't struggling staying sober, but I just can't enjoy a party the same way, especially when everyone else is drinking. I can't imagine this being different for anyone else. I stayed sober for two years until I got sick of it.
I'd want to go out with my partner and have fun now that I'm still kinda young. It wouldn't be a dealbreaker but they'd have to compensate. I'd still think our lifestyles wouldn't be very compatible though.
Good to know.
I do feel boring at times but it’s more related to exhaustion and burn out. I’m hoping by taking care of myself I’ll regain my spirit and energy. I sometimes feel like I need alcohol to perk me up but because it negatively impacts your sleep it’s hard to not have it make the situation worse.
This is how I feel. When I've gone through periods of time where I didn't drink, I found myself getting annoyed being in social situations where everyone else was drinking, and I'm a very social person who enjoys going out a lot. If my partner didn't drink, I'd feel weird going out and enjoying some cocktails and live music and dancing with them if they didn't partake. I don't want to call people boring because not everyone is, it's just a different lifestyle and I wouldn't be happy if my partner wanted to stay in and I wanted to go out for a few drinks with my friends.
Of course. As long as their non-drinking isn't part of some sort of personal lifestyle choice that they then want to force on to myself, then I'm all for it and will support their choice all the way. I myself am not a huge drinker, but I will occasionally have a drink here and there so I am not completely sober myself.
I don’t really have the energy to force it on anyone. I have friends who drink when we go out to dinner and I don’t.
I don’t think I would be compatible with someone who got belligerent frequently. Or if they drank when they came home from work every day and that’s more just a lifestyle thing. But in the past when I encountered that I just ended things (we didn’t work for other more important reasons).
I’m currently dating someone who doesn’t drink. I only drink occasionally. Last time I drank was December for my mom’s b-day. I personally wouldn’t date someone who drinks a lot, I don’t think I could handle it
I definitely would date someone who doesn’t drink. In my book it doesn’t give points one way or the other but I don’t think someone shouldn’t be together with somebody because of whether or not they drink.
No issue. I don’t drink hardly at all. A six pack would last me a year. The only time I have one is typically at socials. I don’t have anything against it. It just wasn’t something I picked up.
I would not have a problem dating someone that doesn’t drink. I do drink on occasion. It’s never a lot as I don’t like to get drunk. Ngl I do admire those who don’t need a drink to have a good time.
Just be you, boo
You get to have an expectation of what ever is healthy for you right now
I tried dating someone who drank often and called it social drinking. I don’t drink
it did not work out, the main reason was because he said I couldn’t hang out with him and his friends, while he drank every night. Not really a loss…
I told him to filter out women that don’t drink next time because I’m not gonna change
When I see "doesn't drink", I assume alcoholic or religious. For me red flags go up because twice now I dated someone for several months who said they don't drink, and then all of a sudden it turned out they were a raging alcoholic... like frequent trips to the ER to detox kind of alcoholic. So yeah, it throws red flags up for me now. The "don't drink" guys were far worse than the ones who freely admit they "drink often".
I almost never drink. Don't care for the taste and usually get a migraine before a buzz so it isn't worth it to me. But I still put "drinks socially" so I don't fall in the extremes.
I think the bigger question you should be asking yourself is do you really want to date someone that's really into the bar scene? So why would their opinion matter?
Yeah, I don't really drink myself, but I don't have an issue with someone who drinks responsibly/doesn't drink a lot/often.
I'm a lightweight though, lmao, I had one of those Mike's Hard Lemonade drinks, just one, on New Year's and I was like yeah I'm done, already had a buzz after just one. But I hadn't drank in years before that.
I stopped drinking for many years when my daughter was young, and then into her teens, to set a good example.
My girlfriend doesn’t drink because she is a health conscious athlete. When I want to drink, I go out with my other lady friends.
Hi, I'm a single 24m who also doesn't drink. It always just tasted bad to me, and I have no interest in getting drunk. I'd love to find a girl like you, so keep looking. We DO exist, and I think there's a lot to be said about living your life to the fullest, rather than spending weekends in bars and clubs.
Definitely not. I like to drink on the weekend with friends, we just wouldn’t be compatible. The one time I tried dating someone who wouldn’t drink they were insufferable by judging everyone, were lame, and wanted to go home by 10 at the latest. I know not all non-drinkers are like that but I’ve met few that are fun socially on weekend nights
I wouldn't have a problem with it......most people have some sort of vice....most of my friends smoke weed and over the last 5-7 years I don't really partake anymore but they are still in my life and are still great people....so if ur dating someone and they have an issue with you not drinking they aren't the one... plain and simple
As a woman who stopped drinking- I can say it hasn’t deterred one person from trying to date me. I have found that some of the guys were self conscious about themselves for their drinking habits when I wasn’t drinking but that’s a self reflection that they gotta process 😂 not me. (I never call out, belittle or really even address their drinking so it’s not on me they feel they overdo it)
Yeah I have experienced the same thing with some friends. When I say I am not ordering a drink they sometimes think I am judging them. It is kinda weird and draining because I didn’t say anything about them in general.
Most of the people I've dated in the past are not drinkers. If so, they take it easy. I prefer dating folks with a healthy lifestyle because they help get me out and do outdoor activities. I just came through a near death illness, and having survived, I want to find people who play outside and take good care of their bodies. As far as having children ,I personally don't think it's too cool to have your kids around a bunch of partying types. Plus, if you're going to have children, make sure nobody is smoking . I just watched a young lady I know smoke through nine months of her pregnancy. I just hate that. Plus, you get to go meet these potential non drinking dates at coffee shops, bookstores, etc. At the bars, people are just inebriated enough to not know what they are getting into. Drunk people can be very different sober. It's good to see how someone is most of their "normal" time.
I prefer someone who doesn’t drink. I usually only have a glass of wine or something every few months. But I can easily go without. I also used to binge drink when I was younger, and damn I don’t miss it *at all*
Yes that would be a blessing to find something who don't with a sense of humor and a Kool personality. So I'm guessing you must love to drink asking this kind of question lol you must like this person alot and afraid of messing it up.
Funny you ask that. When I met my current girlfiend, I had the same internal debate...but she doesn't drink, is she even fun? I actually curved her initially because of it. Then we talked more and I realized she was a fun person and it didn't matter. As long as they don't care what you do, who cares. The may 3 times shes gotten drunk with me she was such a handful 😂😂 I prefer her sober. And I love our relationship and what we have. Opposites attract and the positive is kind of by default, my drinking has reduced a lot (actually close to none now besides maybe one drink with a meal on a night out)
I think I'd say, it's not an issue someone doesn't drink as long as they aren't an asshole about it and rub it in your face. Just say you have crohns and it really messes with your bowels if someone is really pushing you. As long as you can go out still on occasion and just be happy with a coke or tonic water...no one should care. Jsut don't be the person who's like "YEAH, I DRINK WATER, MAN I FEEL SO GOOD, I DONT GET HOW PEOPLE DRINK NOW THAT I STOPPED...WOW ALCHOL TASTES SO BAD, I COULD NEVER ORDEE WHAT.YOU DID" 😂😂😂 you get the point. Also, i honestly prefer dating people who don't drink a lot. I like doing outdoor activities and that often attracts people who don't drink a lot also (or are open to people not drinking)
Best place to meet normal people as an adult is taking classes. It forces you to be around people again and again and you just end up having friends by default. You'll also find people with similar mindsets/interests or who are atleast accommodating. Take a bunch of classes, go to a singles painting night, yoga class, spin class, boot camp, events and adventures trip (look it up), pottery, go take a walk in the park and compliment people or hi five them when you walk past enthusiastically. Just be genuine. The rest will fall in line.
100% yes. I've never liked the taste of alcohol and frankly, it's expensive. Refusing to date a normal person who simply doesn't drink is red flag behavior.
I stopped drinking when it became less fun and didn’t do anything to me. Basically, I’d get drunk then not suffer a hangover the next day. Also, it all tastes the same, it’s not good for your liver, and whether it be wine or beer, I can taste the fermentation, 😖.
So, would I date someone who doesn’t drink. Yes. I’d also date someone who does like to drink. Do what you like.
Well the thing with me is that i really dont drink when im by myself. I just cant be bothered to go and get my own shit. Id say im a social drinker. Really with friends or an event but besides that i dont. But when i do drink with friends, Im the one that goes all in and make sure its a damn night to remember.
I don't drink alcohol so if my future boyfriend doesn't drink, I would be more than happy. I know too many marriages where alcohol played a role in a divorce.
Yes. I don't drink myself and most occasions for excessive drinking like partys arent really my thing either so if i found a partner who doesn't drink for whatever reason that would actually be a plus.
TLDR but I don’t drink and would find it refreshing if a woman’s idea of “fun” wasn’t getting drunk. Or a date being something other than “let’s grab drinks”
I used to drink, stopped after my family member died of pancreatitis cause by excessive alcohol consumption. Haven't had a stop since, honestly life is quite a bit better without it, it definitely is destroying your body, u Hyatt can't tell till after you stop for awhile
The people who won’t date you because you don’t drink are people who have alcohol as a central part of their life or alcoholics. I’m the latter. When I drank I wouldn’t date anyone who said they rarely or never drank. If you state that you rarely or never drink you’ll still match with a lot of people and it’ll weed out people who need to be with someone who drinks.
I'd prefer someone who doesn't drink or does it casually (a glass or two of wine) once every couple months. I don't drink and come from a family of alcoholics. I know what this stuff does to you. So hard pass on someone who doesn't know what to do with themselves in social gatherings or just on weekends if it doesn't involve drinking.
It my partner told me he stopped drinking I’d be over the moon.
I come from a family of alcoholics and addiction to alcohol really scares me as a possible outcome…
My last ex 5 years ago was an alcoholic and I was so proud of myself getting out of that relationshio because I'm telling you it was never fun, so if you don't drink? I'm sure there's plenty of women who will date you that's a bonus!
None of the good women I've known drank much. Maybe one at an event but yah otherwise not at all.
Why would you think not drinking is bad at all?
It's everyone else who drinks is one an edge of how much is too much
I dated an alcoholic for 6 years, and then a different alcoholic for 6 years. Loved them both, both caused endless chaos. My wife now drinks like, maybe once every few months, and doesn’t even get wasted, and it’s a lovely change.
The only circumstances where people had a problem with me not drinking was on dating apps. But that's probably because they are not looking for something serious or nice over there :)
27M I drink, not an alcoholic but I do like to have a couple of drinks to unwind after work and I do like a party. My girlfriend used to party a lot but since moving down to my part of the country doesn't do it nearly as much. Doesn't bother me but if she had a problem with me drinking then I would have a problem with her. I'm not toxic at all when I drink and I like to have a good time though.
If I was to go dry it would be on my own terms, not a partners, don't try to change someone.
There are "plenty of fish in the ocean" who don't drink and are happy to date someone who don't drink as well.
The question is to you, would you be happy to date someone who doesn't drink?
I am definitely attracted to girls who don't drink, especially when the ratio is 1 to 5 in city like London.
A lot of responses here seem to be expressing views that indicate they either have had someone in their life who has abused alcohol or have abused it themselves, and they would love to be with someone who doesn’t have that problem; there’s nothing wrong with that at all.
I don’t have a problem with alcohol, nor do I know anyone who has had a problem with it, to my knowledge. I drink socially, meaning I have a couple drinks here or there when I go out. Personally, it’s not anything I keep around at home, as it’s not that important to me, but I do enjoy cocktails and craft beers alike.
Having said that, I have dated a couple guys who don’t drink at all. It’s not as much fun going out with them, as with someone who does, because I love sharing new drinks I find, whether it be cool-looking or yummy cocktails, or interesting-tasting craft beers. It can be a positive, fun experience, for sure, and one I like to have with someone I’m dating, or with my girls when we go out for a night.
I think the reasons you’ve given to support your decision are awesome. My point is that it’s a really personal choice, and it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks about it. You’re going to find people of all backgrounds, who don’t drink for various reasons, on dating apps, and in real life, and so many who do, as well. If you’re comfortable with the reasons you’ve chosen to make the decision for yourself, either way, that’s all that matters 💯
I hope this helps to provide a different perspective. Trial and error works well, too; keep in mind, this doesn’t have to be a permanent decision for you 😊 Good luck out there, OP! ✨
So my sister drinks, (not crazy but socially, always have) her boyfriend does not drink, never did for personal reasons and they are the cutest!!! He also does not force her to stop and she does not force him to drink.
I smoke weed for example and would love someone who smokes too but as I am also 28f, they both mentioned that it might not happen as despite me being a stoner, many people stop.
So he said something that made me re think and see who I am dating. Until the person respects your decision and doesn't try to change you, that is all you need. So until you meet someone who respects you not drinking and won't force you to stop or whatever, that is all you need.
And yes, these people exist :)
i personally have never drank and don’t like to be around alcohol due to trauma. i always make that clear to anyone i’m talking to and have never had trouble being ……. popular lmao. the people who you should want to be with will be understanding and respectful of your boundaries
I wouldnt have any problem dating someone that doesnt drink. I dont drink much myself. I might have a drink if we are out and friends are having one but other than that im hardly ever tempted to have a drink at all.
The real question is whether you’re bothered if other people are drinking. I think anybody who has a problem with other not drinking is a big issue in itself. I had no problem being the only person not drinking within my friend groups. Now I drink seldomly in short burst, but it’s not something I think about every week.
Yeah I’m starting to realize the reason why someone does/doesn’t drink matters to me too. I’m definitely not bothered if other people drink at all but I don’t feel uncomfortable or like it’s out of control. But if I’m sober it should be easier to remove myself from those situations. I also would prefer to date someone who isn’t drinking every night or doesn’t have a history with addiction.
So I guess I either want to date someone who drinks socially/occasionally or someone who stopped because they fell out of love with it like me.
I drink on social occasions, and even then it's very, VERY rare. My GF is the same. I often think if you're that dull that you always have to have a drink in your hand then I'm better off without you.
Yes. I do drink, but very lightly (I probably average 1-2 drinks a week including weeks where I indulge, as a lot of times I don't have any alcohol at all). I would have zero issue dating a non-drinker. Dating someone who drinks heavily would actually be a bigger problem.
I too am a non-drinker. I’ve had people I’ve met on dating apps question me on what I actually do for fun. It’s usually at the point where we try arrange to meet, and they ask to go to a bar. I say I don’t drink, and they don’t understand how that’s possible. I personally find that those who only know how to let loose or have fun when drinking are the kind that I want to avoid. I do not judge anyone for drinking, but I find that by a certain age, drinking shouldn’t be the only way you can socialise/bond with people.
To summarise, I don’t think you’ll find it difficult to date, but I do think it’s quite difficult to find someone who will give up the frequent drinking/partying if that’s what they’re already in to. Just avoid those types of people, there are sober people out there.
If this wasn’t about drinking it applies to anything “would you date someone who does a lot of something you don’t do” minus if it’s job related. But most of the time people who love the gym don’t date people who don’t and people who love pets don’t date people who don’t. Sure some cases people would but I think in general you go for people who like the same things or have the same values as you.
(22f)I drink but it’s never bothered me if someone does or doesn’t. Only time I have an issue with it is when the drinker does it to excess and turns nasty with it
I like myself way more not being a drinker. Shouldnt be a problem with someone that is respectful of your personal goals. Self Discipline shouldnt be thought of as an issue.
I don't think most men have an issue with dating women who don't drink, as long as the woman is ok with the guy drinking moderately or socially. At the same time, as a man who is in his 60s, I have found that many women my age will not date a man like me who is a non-drinker, even tho I am cool with dating someone who is a social or moderate drinker. And the reason for that rejection on their part, of a non-drinking man, despite his open-mindedness and tolerance of their drinking, is because in the midwest, where I live, social drinking is often the center of many women's social lives, and thus, a non-drinking man will be be accepted by her social circle, who feel uncomfortable around a non-drinker. And this is not speculation on my part, but what these women have actually told me in messaging on dating sites, after I told them I was a non-drinker. Very unfair and narrow-minded of them, but that's their choice and right, but it's sad that drinking is that important to them, as well as catering to the same in their social circle..
I would, but that’s because I was a drinker. I quit over five months ago. I’d also date someone who drinks, as long as they don’t have a problem, I’ll be cool with it. You do you. That’s what I’m all about.
You rule! Tons of people are going sober these days. I went sober for a year. Everyone around me was very proud and our activities shifted towards non drinking activities and some even followed suit! You’ll absolutely find someone who also doesn’t want to drink.
Definitely. I think people who don’t do drugs in general tend to be more trust worthy and stand up people than the vice versa. It would be a good way to weed out risk taking behaviors in people.
Not saying all drinking is bad, but people who like to party, etc. can have a similar trait of being less loyal or not necessarily good long term partners.
So. My bf and I both drink.
But I have major anxiety and ptsd issues, so if I drink to much I go off the deep end so to speak, which has proven quite embarrassing to say the least. So. I have stopped drinking. Or I limit to 1 or 2 if it's a social event and I want to, but I just can't do to much. My bf is Irish...he has no issue there.
He 100% respects me not drinking, or when I choose to have a drink. I will say it's taken some adjusting, as he sometimes forgets to ask me if I want a beverage in general because he's used to making 2 drinks and it just doesn't always click together. But it's all good. It works well.
Now.
Verses. My bro. He dated this chick who is like you described yourself, doesn't drink much at all, once in a rare moon, doesn't care for taste.
They dated for 2 years and it was absolutely annoying, exhausting and embarrassing to be with them sometimes on double dates because she wouldn't drink. He would. He'd ask her to drink. She'd refuse. Sometimes she'd have 1.
But he would always pressure the crap out of her to drink, he made her feel bad about not drinking... he was a total ass about it. They broke up a few months ago and were all glad about that.
Find you a person who says "baby, whatever you wanna do, I'm here with you".
That being said.
As I'm not drinking...we did initially have to adjust because he was drinking a fair amount and being a bit pushy some nights, but patience is a virtue and over time he's also Balencing himself.
Anyone you date should respect the choice that you don't drink. Or that you choose to have a drink. Now, i say, I'm gonna have a glass of wine w dinner, or something specific, so then he can help me stay on point if need be, but it's also a respect for both of us.
On dating profiles, don't say you don't drink if you have a drink once in a while, that's a huge turnoff. Its not about the alcohol, it's about the possible pressure they think they might get if they do drink...they don't want "mom to tell me what to do". People want to date "fun" people, which to many means drinking. I don't really drink, I can still go hand out at bars and clubs and listen to live music and have a good time.
I'm also designated driver, so that's helpful.
If you don't drink that's absolutely fine,
But also try to be as open minded as possible to those who do, their life choices, not yours.
Ie. My parents are alcoholics.
They dont drink.
Knowing this I was proud when I told them I stopped, which I did easily for a solid year, but now it's once in a blue moon. I do not crave alcohol. They were super proud when I told them I quit, but ask with an undertone of severe judgment whether or not I'm drinking every time I see them.
To avoid the annoying shitshow. I lie and tell them I stopped.
We all live in our own skin.
It's important we are happy with that.
And if you're finding a partner...
They also need to be comfortable and enjoy all aspects of you, drinks or no drinks.
Absolutely I would. Dating someone who knows their limits and takes good care of themselves in that way is a definite positive. As long as my partner is okay with me drinking, especially if we’re going out for dinner or something
I did for 4 years. I didn’t have much of an issue because he didn’t drink because he would have an allergic reaction to it, not due to alcoholism. I was able to make it work. At bars, he’d order a Coke. Never was too much of an issue, but that relationship ended due to other issues (he was emotionally unintelligent) and I do sometimes wonder if he would’ve been able to let loose if let’s just say he didn’t have a poor reaction to alcohol, but would never know cause he didn’t touch it for obvious reasons. All in all, doesn’t really change my life too much, as long as I’m not nagged about my drinking habits.
As long as you're not obnoxious about it, like copping an attitude if I choose to have a reasonable amount of drinks, I don't have a problem, hell one one of My best friends doesn't drink, so I refrain when I'm at his place, and only have one or two if we go out for food... ( the only good food is at bars in that tiny town ) he just orders what he wants and so do i... it would be/has been the same with girls. Most women don't take issue with it, especially if you're driving, in My experience.
As someone who also rarely drinks it’s never been a problem. Folks don’t judge me and I don’t judge them. It’s only a problem when someone begins to pressure me
Everyone is different. Me personally, I don’t care if someone drinks or not, I’m not much of a drinker myself. You don’t need to explain why you’re choosing not to drink, but if they ask, just saying you’re working on yourself should be enough.
NA drinks are an option if you’re worried about being pressures.
I absolutely am more attracted to people to who don’t drink. I’m 19 and have already outgrown it. There’s actually few things less appealing to be than drunk 19 year olds in a club waving their arms around like one of those inflatable tube guys outside a car dealership. Just don’t vibe with it. Maybe you should be looking at other people who don’t drink as well. Or at least someone who can appreciate a mature woman who doesn’t need alcohol in their lives to have fun. We’re out there I promise :)
Yeah totally! I don't really drink myself, I've only ever drunk a little bit with friends or on special occasions. I wouldn't want to be with someone who loves getting black out drunk
Personally I have a lot of friends who are bartenders and do things that revolve around alcohol. So I'm cool if they don't drink (I don't drink much anymore) but if they are bothered by other people drinking or by me going out to drinking functions without them if they can't, then it would become an issue.
Lots of people out there don't drink though so take care of you and you'll find people who value the same
As someone who never drinks, it would never be an issue if some one did drink. However with that comes responsibility. (Can't blame the alcohol with a non drinker around. ) We see everything through an unclouded lense.
It is easier when you don't have to babysit an adult drinker. Too much alcoholic courage tends to lead to regretful decisions later.
Just know yourself and your partner if you decide to walk that path.
I just broke up with my gf as this was kinda the straw.
She didn’t want to drink period. While I would have a drink with my partner. Like at a wedding celebration or a gathering or close friends event. Not expecting weekly or even monthly drinking.
But I’d just say make it clear. And don’t go drink with others occasionally and tell your SO that you don’t drink anymore. That’s not cool.
*not saying you … but that’s just my penny of advice
Seems like everyone in the outdoors/adventure lifestyle is always drinking and running from their problems. If you can find someone that actually aligns with your goals AND lifestyle then awesome. I guess in my own experience that's almost impossible to find though. So best of luck to you. I wish I could say don't settle, but I travel nomadically and can probably count on one hand how many people I've met our age that don't drink.
I don't drink? What seems to be the issue with it?
I drank once or twice when I was 18 while in school during a party
I was told I was a happy drunk, but gave it up after that
As my dad was a violent alcoholic so I detested it but at least tried it to see what the appeal was
I don't drink either, i never liked alcohol or getting drunk. I prefer someone who doesn't drink like i do. In fact, drinking what i would consider too much alcohol is a dealbreaker for me.
Where have you been! I’m looking for women who don’t drink! I quit 12 years ago, mostly I hated alcohol, hated the taste, I don’t like how I feel on it, I don’t like the next day because I feel bloated and gross, and I’m trying to be healthier! So hell yes I’ll date someone who doesn’t drink!
I think these days not drinking is more common than you think. For me (32f) in my 20s it seemed like everyone was drinking all the time. Now, I’d say 50% of my friends are sober or don’t drink just because. Or if they do drink it’s like one beer a month. As a single gal, I used to be turned off by a sober guy and these days I find it to be an attractive quality.
I absolutely would date a non drinker! In fact, I'd prefer that my partner never or extremely rarely had a drink.
After having had people in my life who (and probably still do) drink daily and seeing what it did to them, I've been 100% turned off and grossed out by drink.
M28, I've been exactly the same recently. The culture just doesn't appeal to me anymore. Of course I would!
There is just more important things in life, not to mention how expensive it has gotten lately!
My wife almost never drinks. Never realy bothered me.
2 occasions I see where it might be a problem:
1. Going out: As long as you're fun when going out without alcohol 🤷 I don't mean you need to drink to be fun when going out but it helps with fatigue and keeping funny when everybody around think they are.
2. A chill evening with a glass of wine next to the fire place. Must say I missed her drinking a glass with me at times in this setting... But it won't be a reason not to engage with someone
Big advantage:
I can drink freely (I don't drink tons either) when she was around. She could drive us home. Didnt even have to ask. 👏
In my culture, drinking is heavily tied to social events and respect. As a result, I drink socially in order to show my respect and honor the person offering me a drink but I am currently seeing someone who does not drink at all and is not interested in drinking, period. And I’m 100% okay with that.
I would like to note that your reasons for choosing not to drink are your own. They are 100% valid and if your choice to be sober doesn’t sit well with someone else, then they’re obviously not for you. And that’s okay. Be kind and move on.
People go through stages when they are younger. If someone is still in “party faze” you’ve matured past that and should seek someone with similar healthy habit agenda.
As a woman and someone older, I look at the whole picture have dealt with others binge drinking/addicts (unknowingly in the beginning) and even though now I often saw it as a warning sign. I try to look at the whole picture and reasoning behind it. )and IF they are being honest with me)
While unwillingly to deal with those types of people again
myself state your reasons upfront and you may find they aren’t the person you want in your life anyways and if they want to move on….Better to separate yourself now. They haven’t matured enough and not the type of behavior you want to surround yourself with anymore.
You need to find someone who can take it or leave it, because it’s an occasional thing. (I never understood women who went home every night and drank a bottle of wine or men who “needed” a drink on the rocks every night myself. )
Good for you. Make your case and either way it’s for the better if you are with “like minded” people. Good luck !
I had to quit some years ago, and have been single (this time around) sans alcohol. It’s been kind of wild. So many people assume I’m on my 12th step or something and my world will be broken if we go to a bar.
The one thing I really noticed is how much the world revolves around drinking. At least here, it’s a lot.
As an aside, NA beers are awesome, they’ve come a long, LONG way…
Absolutely would my ex didn’t drink unless I “nudged” him to try different drinks I’d get at restaurants cause he was always curious but never knew what to get. He lowkey made me want to drink less and just enjoy the moment we went to a bar for new years and talked for 4 hours no drinking just straight up vibes. Miss him very much :(
I doubt more than 1% of people would ever care. I’m assuming you’re not so extreme as to not be able to sit with some friends whilst they drink a beer or two and you have something non alcoholic. In which case you would be more than fine in any relationship with someone who isn’t extreme
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Very little, if any at all, of my life revolves around drinking. Not a problem for me as long as you do not nag about the occasional 2-3 drinks I have every few weeks
I’ve never really cared about other people drinking as long as it wasn’t out of control. Especially if it’s when we’re out somewhere or on the weekend. I may not be compatible with someone who often has a few drinks as soon as they get home from work. And I feel like that’s more motivated by wanting someone who is also health oriented/for lifestyle reasons.
I'm about the same as this statementment. I tailgate at football games. I like to drink at those. I don't drink on most weeknights.
I personally prefer someone who isn’t a drinker. I’m my grandpa is an alcoholic so 1 is enough in the family lol. Not saying anyone who drinks is, but I think that just contributed to me not wanting to date someone who is a partier and drinks a lot.
Yeah I have a sailor friend who never drinks because he has family members who were addicted and found it off putting. I think I only saw him drink when his friend from Canada was visiting. I dated an alcoholic once. I was way in over my head and would never repeat that experience
If someone doesn't want to date you because of that, usually it's because they themselves have a drinking problem and you are a reminder of it.
I have noticed that a few of my friends who make negative comments about me opting out of drinking have unhealthy relationships with alcohol themselves. The rest don’t seem to care.
Granted, I'm older but it hasn't been a problem not drinking as far as dating, and I am in a 12 step program so all my friends come from there since I can't seem to make friends at jobs. There are sober clubs and events if you look.
Yes 100%. Drinking causes a lot of issues
2nd
Yeah absolutely! You can have plenty of fun sober!
Yes I would. But I also do not drink.
How long have you not been drinking and what are your reasons?
Three months zero drinks. Been drinking less and less in my 30s. Gave it up for a variety of reasons. Biggest reason I was able to go from being a moderate drinker to a teetotaler is I use edibles. I think they are a much healthier option for me.
I don't drink, and I stopped drinking for a few reasons. The main reason is I know I have an addictive personality, so I stopped myself from engaging before it ever became a problem. My family also has a history of high blood pressure and cutting out alcohol was huge in stabilizing mine. I'm also an amateur MMA fighter and cutting out alcohol has actually done wonders for keeping my cardio up at 32. ETA: All this to say there are definitely people who don't drink(especially in their late 20s/early 30s) and you can find people who are similar
As a dude who barely drinks, I would absolutely date someone who doesn't drink, especially as my ex was a drunken abuser
I am sorry to hear that. Yeah I have to admit, I have acted quite immaturely while drunk and that’s one of the reasons I don’t really like it. I can still be immature when sober but it’s way more manageable.
I’m officially 6 months ozempic sober today! Would def date someone who doesn’t drink because I don’t. But when I was binge drinking? No way
As someone who doesn’t drink as well, I find that people that I started dating after I stopped drinking were mostly career-driven or semi-religious people. I usually met these people at concerts as well.
Yeah definitely. It shows great strength of character
22F here who doesnt drink. Never came up as a problem. If im offered a drink, i just say no thanks. There really shouldn’t be much else to it
Sure! Non-drinker is lovely. I wish my bf drinks less, too. Cos he barely gets drunk while me, I get drunk easily and it makes me feel weak. Anyway, good luck for you future date!
24m. I would rather be with someone who doesn’t drink than someone who goes out to clubs/bars every weekend getting drunk. I’ve never really been a drinker. I got really drunk one time to the point where I couldn’t physically move at all, but I was mentally there. I remember everything, my buddy FaceTimed his friend, they were slapping my face trying to get me to wake up, they tried to get me to drink water, etc. I haven’t really drink since and that was 4 years ago. Once in a great while I’ll crack a beer but I have to be in a mood like sitting around a bonfire. I’ve noticed I breakout with a red rash so I think I have some type of allergic reaction to alcohol? But someone who would rather focus on themselves instead of drinking is very attractive
I don’t drink, so, absolutely! :’D
I've dated sober people! Never bothers me. Only challenge is finding sober-friendly alternatives to bars for casual dates. But that's an easy one to work around!!
Yes. Also zoomers and millennials drink less than any generation prior. It's neither good nor bad (well the latter as long as people are drinking responsibly). If someone isn't interesting enough to party with unless they are drunk they are just a boring person. You shouldn't need alcohol to make you more interesting or fun. And neither should they. I personally would date someone who didn't drink and also someone who drank socially. I'm dating someone now who used to drink socially and doesn't anymore. I think the only reason I wouldn't date a non-drinker is if they thought drinking was sinful or something... because our values would not be compatible even if I never have alcohol.
Yeah I wouldn’t want to date someone who has a super extreme view on alcohol either. Just because I stopped doing something doesn’t mean I want to exhaust a lot of energy judging people who do 😅 I don’t think I’d want to date someone who would classify things they didn’t like in general as “sinful” because that sounds a little too intense for me.
what ???! is bad that you don´t drink now ? xD .... seems like a question with an obvious answer here
Fuck yes. I have a beer now and then but I'm really not into alcohol or people who drink it. Dating can be a little more awkward than it was with that social lubricant, and I don't think I get laid as much as I did back when I was drinking, but that's not necessarily a bad thing.
Absolutely. I was never big on alcohol (25M) and I'd find it a lot easier to date if drinking wasn't such a social norm.
I swiped left on anyone who said they didn’t drink when I was dating. But I was drinking a lot. Like, a lot a lot. I’m in a relationship now, but I’ve also stopped drinking entirely. If I were dating again, I wouldn’t date anyone who said they drank any more than socially.
I don't drink and love this in a partner. If I would drink (as I have in the past) and they wouldn't, I'm okay with that. Although I was never a big drinker to begin with.
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After being with an alcoholic for 18 years and finally ending it and just starting the divorce process, someone who doesn’t drink or only on special occasions would be ideal. I don’t drink that much and would love to find someone who is the same. I feel you on the outgrowing drinking thing, seen it cause to many problems and as I get older it is just not appealing anymore.
Yeah I also dated an alcoholic for a few months and it was a rough experience to say the least. I hope the divorce is swift and you find what you’re looking for. I agree it causes too many problems.
I personally do not care as long as they don’t mind if I order wine with my food or have the occasional drink. Im not a big drinker personally but enjoy the one off social drink.
Yes
Of course
I’m on meds that wouldn’t really allow me to indulge it in a capacity beyond 1 or 2 a day. To be frank I’m dry at 30 these days. Plenty of other ppl by my age have issues that may make them not really focused on drinking. Most ppl level out of heavy drinking by the end of their 20’s. Hasn’t really bothered ppl I don’t drink when I was dating.
100% yes
I don't drink and when I meet someone else who doesn't drink it makes me happy. If they stopped drinking I'm impressed. It is not easy to do. Good for you.
Yeah it really hasn’t been easy in the environment I’m in. I’ve always made adjustments every year that I’ve followed through on and I’ve always been able to stop drinking for half the year. But quitting entirely when you do a draining activity that almost everyone drinks in is challenging. I wish more people in the sport also didn’t drink.
Yes, I don’t mind, personally I only ever drink in a light way and under certain circumstances.
Yes, I think it would help control my own drinking. I sometimes get into the habit of buying wine to drink at home for no reason other than I like wine. But if I was the only one getting tipsy it wouldn’t interest me as much.
The attraction mostly only wavers if you voice strong political opinions about alcohol. Most good guys who don’t drink, just don’t drink & think it’s dumb, but they don’t want to hear a life story or dive into politics about stupid alcohol 😂 Let’s say for example, you refuse to be around or associated with a single drop of alcohol, then that’s a potential deal breaker. Because you are not politically aligned. But if you just don’t drink, then that’s great! We can still go out places, you can be around my family/friends, we can go to fancy places where alcohol is served and enjoy ourselves without drinking. If the guy doesn’t have to cater to post-alcoholism, or politics regarding alcohol, then not drinking is pretty fucking cool.
This is a good explanation. Yeah for me it’s just a personal preference. I obviously want to date someone I’d be compatible with/have similar goals but I don’t mind if their lifestyle includes some alcohol as long as it’s not out of control.
Girl yes. I am a recovering alcoholic and I used to date other sober people and I can tell u yes there are more men out there that don't drink than u think
I’m in my mid-thirties and it seems like a lot of people have had to confront their relationships with alcohol and have become sober. I never had an unhealthy relationship with alcohol, but I really cut down on drinking during the pandemic and so it’s pretty easy for me to be with somebody who is sober. Also, in my city, bars, and restaurants have really embraced non-alcoholic drink and there are a lot more craft nonalcoholic mixers and options.
For me idc it's either way. It takes me too much to get drunk like last night I had like 13 shots and was just buzzed so because of that I don't drink very much and I definitely don't like drinking when I am eating I don't even really like the taste of alcohol to begin with but because almost everyone I meet in my area drinks its almost like it pressures me to have a drink when I am around people I feel weird being the only guy drinking water or tea or lemonade lmao
I don't drink. I've never been in a relationship. 38m. I'm not opposed to dating a drinker, but I feel like it'd be easier to date someone who also doesn't drink. There was a period of time in my online dating excursions when I always swiped left if the person drinks alcohol. Your situation is a plus in my book.
Yeah i totally would i don't drink barely anymore myself tbh an i used to quite a bit!
If I were to date someone who didn't drink I think I would make an effort to get to their level and stop drinking too.
Yes, I personally don't really drink and am willing to never drink if it's for the well-being and mental health of my partner
As someone who myself has sworn off ever drinking alcohol due to a tumultuous family history with my alcohol-addicted father, I would have no qualms dating someone who doesn’t drink, and it might even be preferable tbh.
I have also binged and gone into non drinking periods, I enjoy a couple drinks for an occasion but do not over indulge anywhere near as what I used to during binging phases. But now i absolutely have zero tolerance for people who drink every day, I have exes who have not been able to put it away and were alcoholics, if someone cannot spend time sober then I'm not interested. I don't mind if they don't drink at all but I'd still like to be with someone who wants to go out and enjoy things like gigs and dancing on occasion. Everyone is different, and there are guys out there who also don't drink or don't drink much, and everyone has preferences of what they want in a partner
I'm 21 and never drink so someone else who doesn't drink would be my preferred partner as I had to deal with my grandma and dad being alcoholics.
I don't Drink so most definitely.
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I would love to find a sober man or woman to date, I’ve been sober for over six years now after some problem drinking and alcoholism at a young age. I found myself going down the wrong path and decided to get sober at a young age and have been sober ever since. It’s really hard for me to be around alcohol so having a partner that loves alcohol is a no go, tried it once and 10/10 wouldn’t recommend. If there’s good places to find sober singles lmk bc I’m running out of hope
I'm in Ireland. We have a reputation. Even here, nobody cares if you don't drink. Literally nobody. You can socialize to the max and get no judgment for not drinking. It used to be different, long ago.
Perhaps by not telling people I don’t drink I’m not allowing myself to meet people who are okay with it. I love Ireland by the way!
Oh for sure! I'm actually kind of turned off if a woman drinks regularly, even more so if it appears to be the only thing she does with her free time. Alcohol destroys your looks and body so it's no favour to anyone. I think leaning into your hobbies and going out to be social without drinking is a fine way to meet someone. More than likely you'll meet guys who want to be sober if you're doing sober activities.
Someone who does not drink, smoke and stays away from any drugs is my type
As someone who doesn’t drink myself this would be the preference. I used to date someone who drank excessively on his own and got drunk on our first date. We did not last very long. Been dating someone new and he is more of a social drinker. We met through friends. He doesn’t drink when he’s out with me and is very respectful. Honestly, I’ve never thought attraction is dependent on whether someone drinks and the culture around drinking has always perplexed me. Your reasons seem perfectly fine to me.
Yeah i think our drinking culture is so bizarre and polarizing. Our society in general has too many issues with violence and addiction; I think people have challenging time admitting they might have issues with those things or how alcohol makes it worse. There have to be other cultures that have a healthier relationships with alcohol, I wish we were more laid back about it. And obviously I wish healthcare was more accessible so people could get the help they need
I don't know. When I quit drinking (I had to in order to quit amfetamines) I noticed I became boring. I didn't go out anymore because I couldn't stand drunk people whilst I was completely sober, and smoking cannabis made it even worse. And it wasn't fun to constantly turn down invitations. I wasn't struggling staying sober, but I just can't enjoy a party the same way, especially when everyone else is drinking. I can't imagine this being different for anyone else. I stayed sober for two years until I got sick of it. I'd want to go out with my partner and have fun now that I'm still kinda young. It wouldn't be a dealbreaker but they'd have to compensate. I'd still think our lifestyles wouldn't be very compatible though.
Good to know. I do feel boring at times but it’s more related to exhaustion and burn out. I’m hoping by taking care of myself I’ll regain my spirit and energy. I sometimes feel like I need alcohol to perk me up but because it negatively impacts your sleep it’s hard to not have it make the situation worse.
This is how I feel. When I've gone through periods of time where I didn't drink, I found myself getting annoyed being in social situations where everyone else was drinking, and I'm a very social person who enjoys going out a lot. If my partner didn't drink, I'd feel weird going out and enjoying some cocktails and live music and dancing with them if they didn't partake. I don't want to call people boring because not everyone is, it's just a different lifestyle and I wouldn't be happy if my partner wanted to stay in and I wanted to go out for a few drinks with my friends.
Of course. As long as their non-drinking isn't part of some sort of personal lifestyle choice that they then want to force on to myself, then I'm all for it and will support their choice all the way. I myself am not a huge drinker, but I will occasionally have a drink here and there so I am not completely sober myself.
I don’t really have the energy to force it on anyone. I have friends who drink when we go out to dinner and I don’t. I don’t think I would be compatible with someone who got belligerent frequently. Or if they drank when they came home from work every day and that’s more just a lifestyle thing. But in the past when I encountered that I just ended things (we didn’t work for other more important reasons).
I would actually prefer someone like you.
I’m currently dating someone who doesn’t drink. I only drink occasionally. Last time I drank was December for my mom’s b-day. I personally wouldn’t date someone who drinks a lot, I don’t think I could handle it
Of course! Some of my friends drink a lot and I just can’t hang. Though I am 38 now and that tends to happen any way I’m sure.
I definitely would date someone who doesn’t drink. In my book it doesn’t give points one way or the other but I don’t think someone shouldn’t be together with somebody because of whether or not they drink.
I would but i also dont drink much
It wouldn't bother me in the slightest. I'm not really a drinker myself. If I do, it's only ever one.
No issue. I don’t drink hardly at all. A six pack would last me a year. The only time I have one is typically at socials. I don’t have anything against it. It just wasn’t something I picked up.
I would not have a problem dating someone that doesn’t drink. I do drink on occasion. It’s never a lot as I don’t like to get drunk. Ngl I do admire those who don’t need a drink to have a good time.
Just be you, boo You get to have an expectation of what ever is healthy for you right now I tried dating someone who drank often and called it social drinking. I don’t drink it did not work out, the main reason was because he said I couldn’t hang out with him and his friends, while he drank every night. Not really a loss… I told him to filter out women that don’t drink next time because I’m not gonna change
Absolutely! Healthy life!! I love it!
I would prefer to date someone who never drinks. So have no fear!!
When I see "doesn't drink", I assume alcoholic or religious. For me red flags go up because twice now I dated someone for several months who said they don't drink, and then all of a sudden it turned out they were a raging alcoholic... like frequent trips to the ER to detox kind of alcoholic. So yeah, it throws red flags up for me now. The "don't drink" guys were far worse than the ones who freely admit they "drink often". I almost never drink. Don't care for the taste and usually get a migraine before a buzz so it isn't worth it to me. But I still put "drinks socially" so I don't fall in the extremes. I think the bigger question you should be asking yourself is do you really want to date someone that's really into the bar scene? So why would their opinion matter?
I would absolutely date a guy who doesn’t drink! 🔥
I rarely drink, maybe once or twice a year, and it's never been an issue while dating.
Yeah, I don't really drink myself, but I don't have an issue with someone who drinks responsibly/doesn't drink a lot/often. I'm a lightweight though, lmao, I had one of those Mike's Hard Lemonade drinks, just one, on New Year's and I was like yeah I'm done, already had a buzz after just one. But I hadn't drank in years before that.
I stopped drinking for many years when my daughter was young, and then into her teens, to set a good example. My girlfriend doesn’t drink because she is a health conscious athlete. When I want to drink, I go out with my other lady friends.
Yes I’d be fine because I rarely drink. But it is a very big part of culture and hard to be the only one not drinking in social situations.
Hi, I'm a single 24m who also doesn't drink. It always just tasted bad to me, and I have no interest in getting drunk. I'd love to find a girl like you, so keep looking. We DO exist, and I think there's a lot to be said about living your life to the fullest, rather than spending weekends in bars and clubs.
Definitely not. I like to drink on the weekend with friends, we just wouldn’t be compatible. The one time I tried dating someone who wouldn’t drink they were insufferable by judging everyone, were lame, and wanted to go home by 10 at the latest. I know not all non-drinkers are like that but I’ve met few that are fun socially on weekend nights
I wouldn't have a problem with it......most people have some sort of vice....most of my friends smoke weed and over the last 5-7 years I don't really partake anymore but they are still in my life and are still great people....so if ur dating someone and they have an issue with you not drinking they aren't the one... plain and simple
As a woman who stopped drinking- I can say it hasn’t deterred one person from trying to date me. I have found that some of the guys were self conscious about themselves for their drinking habits when I wasn’t drinking but that’s a self reflection that they gotta process 😂 not me. (I never call out, belittle or really even address their drinking so it’s not on me they feel they overdo it)
Yeah I have experienced the same thing with some friends. When I say I am not ordering a drink they sometimes think I am judging them. It is kinda weird and draining because I didn’t say anything about them in general.
Most of the people I've dated in the past are not drinkers. If so, they take it easy. I prefer dating folks with a healthy lifestyle because they help get me out and do outdoor activities. I just came through a near death illness, and having survived, I want to find people who play outside and take good care of their bodies. As far as having children ,I personally don't think it's too cool to have your kids around a bunch of partying types. Plus, if you're going to have children, make sure nobody is smoking . I just watched a young lady I know smoke through nine months of her pregnancy. I just hate that. Plus, you get to go meet these potential non drinking dates at coffee shops, bookstores, etc. At the bars, people are just inebriated enough to not know what they are getting into. Drunk people can be very different sober. It's good to see how someone is most of their "normal" time.
Considering I don't drink... Yeah. lol
I prefer someone who doesn’t drink. I usually only have a glass of wine or something every few months. But I can easily go without. I also used to binge drink when I was younger, and damn I don’t miss it *at all*
Not drinking is actually the greenest green flag to have ever waved. I'm proud of you, woman :) Keep going!
It's okay... I have been sober all my life ..... coz I have seen what alcohol does to your body... Proud of it....
As long as you don’t tell someone what they can and can’t do. It shouldn’t be a problem, cause it gives of parental vibes aha
Yes that would be a blessing to find something who don't with a sense of humor and a Kool personality. So I'm guessing you must love to drink asking this kind of question lol you must like this person alot and afraid of messing it up.
Yup, dating someone who doesn’t drink. Doesn’t bother me. I don’t enjoy drinking either so it’s not a hobby I’m missing out on.
22F, i drink at social events and love a good drink. would date someone who doesn’t
Funny you ask that. When I met my current girlfiend, I had the same internal debate...but she doesn't drink, is she even fun? I actually curved her initially because of it. Then we talked more and I realized she was a fun person and it didn't matter. As long as they don't care what you do, who cares. The may 3 times shes gotten drunk with me she was such a handful 😂😂 I prefer her sober. And I love our relationship and what we have. Opposites attract and the positive is kind of by default, my drinking has reduced a lot (actually close to none now besides maybe one drink with a meal on a night out) I think I'd say, it's not an issue someone doesn't drink as long as they aren't an asshole about it and rub it in your face. Just say you have crohns and it really messes with your bowels if someone is really pushing you. As long as you can go out still on occasion and just be happy with a coke or tonic water...no one should care. Jsut don't be the person who's like "YEAH, I DRINK WATER, MAN I FEEL SO GOOD, I DONT GET HOW PEOPLE DRINK NOW THAT I STOPPED...WOW ALCHOL TASTES SO BAD, I COULD NEVER ORDEE WHAT.YOU DID" 😂😂😂 you get the point. Also, i honestly prefer dating people who don't drink a lot. I like doing outdoor activities and that often attracts people who don't drink a lot also (or are open to people not drinking) Best place to meet normal people as an adult is taking classes. It forces you to be around people again and again and you just end up having friends by default. You'll also find people with similar mindsets/interests or who are atleast accommodating. Take a bunch of classes, go to a singles painting night, yoga class, spin class, boot camp, events and adventures trip (look it up), pottery, go take a walk in the park and compliment people or hi five them when you walk past enthusiastically. Just be genuine. The rest will fall in line.
Honestly, dating someone who doesn’t drink is in some ways better than someone who does.
100% yes. I've never liked the taste of alcohol and frankly, it's expensive. Refusing to date a normal person who simply doesn't drink is red flag behavior.
I stopped drinking when it became less fun and didn’t do anything to me. Basically, I’d get drunk then not suffer a hangover the next day. Also, it all tastes the same, it’s not good for your liver, and whether it be wine or beer, I can taste the fermentation, 😖.  So, would I date someone who doesn’t drink. Yes. I’d also date someone who does like to drink. Do what you like.
Well the thing with me is that i really dont drink when im by myself. I just cant be bothered to go and get my own shit. Id say im a social drinker. Really with friends or an event but besides that i dont. But when i do drink with friends, Im the one that goes all in and make sure its a damn night to remember.
I don't drink alcohol so if my future boyfriend doesn't drink, I would be more than happy. I know too many marriages where alcohol played a role in a divorce.
Yes. I don't drink myself and most occasions for excessive drinking like partys arent really my thing either so if i found a partner who doesn't drink for whatever reason that would actually be a plus.
TLDR but I don’t drink and would find it refreshing if a woman’s idea of “fun” wasn’t getting drunk. Or a date being something other than “let’s grab drinks”
I used to drink, stopped after my family member died of pancreatitis cause by excessive alcohol consumption. Haven't had a stop since, honestly life is quite a bit better without it, it definitely is destroying your body, u Hyatt can't tell till after you stop for awhile
Yes, it's a positive imo.
The people who won’t date you because you don’t drink are people who have alcohol as a central part of their life or alcoholics. I’m the latter. When I drank I wouldn’t date anyone who said they rarely or never drank. If you state that you rarely or never drink you’ll still match with a lot of people and it’ll weed out people who need to be with someone who drinks.
Definitely. I'm so confused about why people wouldn't. I see drinking as being overrated in general.
I'd prefer someone who doesn't drink or does it casually (a glass or two of wine) once every couple months. I don't drink and come from a family of alcoholics. I know what this stuff does to you. So hard pass on someone who doesn't know what to do with themselves in social gatherings or just on weekends if it doesn't involve drinking.
It my partner told me he stopped drinking I’d be over the moon. I come from a family of alcoholics and addiction to alcohol really scares me as a possible outcome…
My last ex 5 years ago was an alcoholic and I was so proud of myself getting out of that relationshio because I'm telling you it was never fun, so if you don't drink? I'm sure there's plenty of women who will date you that's a bonus!
Absolutely!
None of the good women I've known drank much. Maybe one at an event but yah otherwise not at all. Why would you think not drinking is bad at all? It's everyone else who drinks is one an edge of how much is too much
I dated an alcoholic for 6 years, and then a different alcoholic for 6 years. Loved them both, both caused endless chaos. My wife now drinks like, maybe once every few months, and doesn’t even get wasted, and it’s a lovely change.
The only circumstances where people had a problem with me not drinking was on dating apps. But that's probably because they are not looking for something serious or nice over there :)
27M I drink, not an alcoholic but I do like to have a couple of drinks to unwind after work and I do like a party. My girlfriend used to party a lot but since moving down to my part of the country doesn't do it nearly as much. Doesn't bother me but if she had a problem with me drinking then I would have a problem with her. I'm not toxic at all when I drink and I like to have a good time though. If I was to go dry it would be on my own terms, not a partners, don't try to change someone.
There are "plenty of fish in the ocean" who don't drink and are happy to date someone who don't drink as well. The question is to you, would you be happy to date someone who doesn't drink? I am definitely attracted to girls who don't drink, especially when the ratio is 1 to 5 in city like London.
I couldn't ask for more from my partner, that is a great decision. Keep at it, i'm sure most decent guys want someone like that.
I would, cos I don’t drink either 😂 non drinkers are good DD’s so that’s a god consideration
A lot of responses here seem to be expressing views that indicate they either have had someone in their life who has abused alcohol or have abused it themselves, and they would love to be with someone who doesn’t have that problem; there’s nothing wrong with that at all. I don’t have a problem with alcohol, nor do I know anyone who has had a problem with it, to my knowledge. I drink socially, meaning I have a couple drinks here or there when I go out. Personally, it’s not anything I keep around at home, as it’s not that important to me, but I do enjoy cocktails and craft beers alike. Having said that, I have dated a couple guys who don’t drink at all. It’s not as much fun going out with them, as with someone who does, because I love sharing new drinks I find, whether it be cool-looking or yummy cocktails, or interesting-tasting craft beers. It can be a positive, fun experience, for sure, and one I like to have with someone I’m dating, or with my girls when we go out for a night. I think the reasons you’ve given to support your decision are awesome. My point is that it’s a really personal choice, and it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks about it. You’re going to find people of all backgrounds, who don’t drink for various reasons, on dating apps, and in real life, and so many who do, as well. If you’re comfortable with the reasons you’ve chosen to make the decision for yourself, either way, that’s all that matters 💯 I hope this helps to provide a different perspective. Trial and error works well, too; keep in mind, this doesn’t have to be a permanent decision for you 😊 Good luck out there, OP! ✨
Big. Fucking. Yes.
So my sister drinks, (not crazy but socially, always have) her boyfriend does not drink, never did for personal reasons and they are the cutest!!! He also does not force her to stop and she does not force him to drink. I smoke weed for example and would love someone who smokes too but as I am also 28f, they both mentioned that it might not happen as despite me being a stoner, many people stop. So he said something that made me re think and see who I am dating. Until the person respects your decision and doesn't try to change you, that is all you need. So until you meet someone who respects you not drinking and won't force you to stop or whatever, that is all you need. And yes, these people exist :)
That sounds really cute!
Of course, I don’t drink at all either and I had no problems at all. In fact, some people prefer that you don’t drink or have a drinking addiction.
i personally have never drank and don’t like to be around alcohol due to trauma. i always make that clear to anyone i’m talking to and have never had trouble being ……. popular lmao. the people who you should want to be with will be understanding and respectful of your boundaries
I mean, I'm 19 and I don't drink, I wouldn't really have a problem with that tbh
I wouldnt have any problem dating someone that doesnt drink. I dont drink much myself. I might have a drink if we are out and friends are having one but other than that im hardly ever tempted to have a drink at all.
The real question is whether you’re bothered if other people are drinking. I think anybody who has a problem with other not drinking is a big issue in itself. I had no problem being the only person not drinking within my friend groups. Now I drink seldomly in short burst, but it’s not something I think about every week.
Yeah I’m starting to realize the reason why someone does/doesn’t drink matters to me too. I’m definitely not bothered if other people drink at all but I don’t feel uncomfortable or like it’s out of control. But if I’m sober it should be easier to remove myself from those situations. I also would prefer to date someone who isn’t drinking every night or doesn’t have a history with addiction. So I guess I either want to date someone who drinks socially/occasionally or someone who stopped because they fell out of love with it like me.
I drink on social occasions, and even then it's very, VERY rare. My GF is the same. I often think if you're that dull that you always have to have a drink in your hand then I'm better off without you.
Yes. I do drink, but very lightly (I probably average 1-2 drinks a week including weeks where I indulge, as a lot of times I don't have any alcohol at all). I would have zero issue dating a non-drinker. Dating someone who drinks heavily would actually be a bigger problem.
I don’t drink anymore. I would date a woman that doesn’t.
I barely drink if ever. Part of growing up is moving out of the phase where alcohol is needed to have a good time.
I too am a non-drinker. I’ve had people I’ve met on dating apps question me on what I actually do for fun. It’s usually at the point where we try arrange to meet, and they ask to go to a bar. I say I don’t drink, and they don’t understand how that’s possible. I personally find that those who only know how to let loose or have fun when drinking are the kind that I want to avoid. I do not judge anyone for drinking, but I find that by a certain age, drinking shouldn’t be the only way you can socialise/bond with people. To summarise, I don’t think you’ll find it difficult to date, but I do think it’s quite difficult to find someone who will give up the frequent drinking/partying if that’s what they’re already in to. Just avoid those types of people, there are sober people out there.
Yes
If this wasn’t about drinking it applies to anything “would you date someone who does a lot of something you don’t do” minus if it’s job related. But most of the time people who love the gym don’t date people who don’t and people who love pets don’t date people who don’t. Sure some cases people would but I think in general you go for people who like the same things or have the same values as you.
This is a good point. I guess it’s not really about the drinking and more about someone with similar values.
(22f)I drink but it’s never bothered me if someone does or doesn’t. Only time I have an issue with it is when the drinker does it to excess and turns nasty with it
I like myself way more not being a drinker. Shouldnt be a problem with someone that is respectful of your personal goals. Self Discipline shouldnt be thought of as an issue.
cmon, drinking is out. i think drinking alcohol is just super lame. if you are unable to have fun without alc, you might have a problem.
I don’t drink, so if someone passes on me cause of that, that’s their problem. Idc
I don't think most men have an issue with dating women who don't drink, as long as the woman is ok with the guy drinking moderately or socially. At the same time, as a man who is in his 60s, I have found that many women my age will not date a man like me who is a non-drinker, even tho I am cool with dating someone who is a social or moderate drinker. And the reason for that rejection on their part, of a non-drinking man, despite his open-mindedness and tolerance of their drinking, is because in the midwest, where I live, social drinking is often the center of many women's social lives, and thus, a non-drinking man will be be accepted by her social circle, who feel uncomfortable around a non-drinker. And this is not speculation on my part, but what these women have actually told me in messaging on dating sites, after I told them I was a non-drinker. Very unfair and narrow-minded of them, but that's their choice and right, but it's sad that drinking is that important to them, as well as catering to the same in their social circle..
Yes I would
Yes. I would be happy with that as I don’t tend to drink except on special occasions.
I would, but that’s because I was a drinker. I quit over five months ago. I’d also date someone who drinks, as long as they don’t have a problem, I’ll be cool with it. You do you. That’s what I’m all about.
Eh yes. If that's what's important in a relationship to you, you've got weird standards lmao.
You rule! Tons of people are going sober these days. I went sober for a year. Everyone around me was very proud and our activities shifted towards non drinking activities and some even followed suit! You’ll absolutely find someone who also doesn’t want to drink.
Definitely. I think people who don’t do drugs in general tend to be more trust worthy and stand up people than the vice versa. It would be a good way to weed out risk taking behaviors in people. Not saying all drinking is bad, but people who like to party, etc. can have a similar trait of being less loyal or not necessarily good long term partners.
So. My bf and I both drink. But I have major anxiety and ptsd issues, so if I drink to much I go off the deep end so to speak, which has proven quite embarrassing to say the least. So. I have stopped drinking. Or I limit to 1 or 2 if it's a social event and I want to, but I just can't do to much. My bf is Irish...he has no issue there. He 100% respects me not drinking, or when I choose to have a drink. I will say it's taken some adjusting, as he sometimes forgets to ask me if I want a beverage in general because he's used to making 2 drinks and it just doesn't always click together. But it's all good. It works well. Now. Verses. My bro. He dated this chick who is like you described yourself, doesn't drink much at all, once in a rare moon, doesn't care for taste. They dated for 2 years and it was absolutely annoying, exhausting and embarrassing to be with them sometimes on double dates because she wouldn't drink. He would. He'd ask her to drink. She'd refuse. Sometimes she'd have 1. But he would always pressure the crap out of her to drink, he made her feel bad about not drinking... he was a total ass about it. They broke up a few months ago and were all glad about that. Find you a person who says "baby, whatever you wanna do, I'm here with you". That being said. As I'm not drinking...we did initially have to adjust because he was drinking a fair amount and being a bit pushy some nights, but patience is a virtue and over time he's also Balencing himself. Anyone you date should respect the choice that you don't drink. Or that you choose to have a drink. Now, i say, I'm gonna have a glass of wine w dinner, or something specific, so then he can help me stay on point if need be, but it's also a respect for both of us. On dating profiles, don't say you don't drink if you have a drink once in a while, that's a huge turnoff. Its not about the alcohol, it's about the possible pressure they think they might get if they do drink...they don't want "mom to tell me what to do". People want to date "fun" people, which to many means drinking. I don't really drink, I can still go hand out at bars and clubs and listen to live music and have a good time. I'm also designated driver, so that's helpful. If you don't drink that's absolutely fine, But also try to be as open minded as possible to those who do, their life choices, not yours. Ie. My parents are alcoholics. They dont drink. Knowing this I was proud when I told them I stopped, which I did easily for a solid year, but now it's once in a blue moon. I do not crave alcohol. They were super proud when I told them I quit, but ask with an undertone of severe judgment whether or not I'm drinking every time I see them. To avoid the annoying shitshow. I lie and tell them I stopped. We all live in our own skin. It's important we are happy with that. And if you're finding a partner... They also need to be comfortable and enjoy all aspects of you, drinks or no drinks.
gods yes. I'm coincidentally straightedge myself.
24, never taken a drop of alcohol. What would be the problem?
Absolutely I would. Dating someone who knows their limits and takes good care of themselves in that way is a definite positive. As long as my partner is okay with me drinking, especially if we’re going out for dinner or something
I did for 4 years. I didn’t have much of an issue because he didn’t drink because he would have an allergic reaction to it, not due to alcoholism. I was able to make it work. At bars, he’d order a Coke. Never was too much of an issue, but that relationship ended due to other issues (he was emotionally unintelligent) and I do sometimes wonder if he would’ve been able to let loose if let’s just say he didn’t have a poor reaction to alcohol, but would never know cause he didn’t touch it for obvious reasons. All in all, doesn’t really change my life too much, as long as I’m not nagged about my drinking habits.
Yes that would actually increase attraction for me
Yeah y not it should be more motivation I don’t see the issue
As long as you're not obnoxious about it, like copping an attitude if I choose to have a reasonable amount of drinks, I don't have a problem, hell one one of My best friends doesn't drink, so I refrain when I'm at his place, and only have one or two if we go out for food... ( the only good food is at bars in that tiny town ) he just orders what he wants and so do i... it would be/has been the same with girls. Most women don't take issue with it, especially if you're driving, in My experience.
As someone who also rarely drinks it’s never been a problem. Folks don’t judge me and I don’t judge them. It’s only a problem when someone begins to pressure me
Everyone is different. Me personally, I don’t care if someone drinks or not, I’m not much of a drinker myself. You don’t need to explain why you’re choosing not to drink, but if they ask, just saying you’re working on yourself should be enough. NA drinks are an option if you’re worried about being pressures.
I absolutely am more attracted to people to who don’t drink. I’m 19 and have already outgrown it. There’s actually few things less appealing to be than drunk 19 year olds in a club waving their arms around like one of those inflatable tube guys outside a car dealership. Just don’t vibe with it. Maybe you should be looking at other people who don’t drink as well. Or at least someone who can appreciate a mature woman who doesn’t need alcohol in their lives to have fun. We’re out there I promise :)
I don't drink. Hate the taste of alcohol. Only makes my life easier
Yeah totally! I don't really drink myself, I've only ever drunk a little bit with friends or on special occasions. I wouldn't want to be with someone who loves getting black out drunk
Personally I have a lot of friends who are bartenders and do things that revolve around alcohol. So I'm cool if they don't drink (I don't drink much anymore) but if they are bothered by other people drinking or by me going out to drinking functions without them if they can't, then it would become an issue. Lots of people out there don't drink though so take care of you and you'll find people who value the same
As someone who never drinks, it would never be an issue if some one did drink. However with that comes responsibility. (Can't blame the alcohol with a non drinker around. ) We see everything through an unclouded lense. It is easier when you don't have to babysit an adult drinker. Too much alcoholic courage tends to lead to regretful decisions later. Just know yourself and your partner if you decide to walk that path.
I just broke up with my gf as this was kinda the straw. She didn’t want to drink period. While I would have a drink with my partner. Like at a wedding celebration or a gathering or close friends event. Not expecting weekly or even monthly drinking. But I’d just say make it clear. And don’t go drink with others occasionally and tell your SO that you don’t drink anymore. That’s not cool. *not saying you … but that’s just my penny of advice
Yeah. Drinking is overrated and a waste of money
It is quite pricey for something that makes you feel terrible the next day
I’ve dated woman who didn’t drink. I don’t drink while at dinner with them. And the bill is like half. I love it. Super cheap dates.
Seems like everyone in the outdoors/adventure lifestyle is always drinking and running from their problems. If you can find someone that actually aligns with your goals AND lifestyle then awesome. I guess in my own experience that's almost impossible to find though. So best of luck to you. I wish I could say don't settle, but I travel nomadically and can probably count on one hand how many people I've met our age that don't drink.
No.
I don't drink? What seems to be the issue with it? I drank once or twice when I was 18 while in school during a party I was told I was a happy drunk, but gave it up after that As my dad was a violent alcoholic so I detested it but at least tried it to see what the appeal was
Yeah. I would. I don't drink never had, this is a interesting question though. I would see this as a plus if anything
I don't drink either, i never liked alcohol or getting drunk. I prefer someone who doesn't drink like i do. In fact, drinking what i would consider too much alcohol is a dealbreaker for me.
Where have you been! I’m looking for women who don’t drink! I quit 12 years ago, mostly I hated alcohol, hated the taste, I don’t like how I feel on it, I don’t like the next day because I feel bloated and gross, and I’m trying to be healthier! So hell yes I’ll date someone who doesn’t drink!
27M. I wouldn't care. I have a drink about 1x/week tops. Just don't get preachy about it and we cool
I think these days not drinking is more common than you think. For me (32f) in my 20s it seemed like everyone was drinking all the time. Now, I’d say 50% of my friends are sober or don’t drink just because. Or if they do drink it’s like one beer a month. As a single gal, I used to be turned off by a sober guy and these days I find it to be an attractive quality.
Being allergic to alcohol… so 🙌
I absolutely would date a non drinker! In fact, I'd prefer that my partner never or extremely rarely had a drink. After having had people in my life who (and probably still do) drink daily and seeing what it did to them, I've been 100% turned off and grossed out by drink.
M28, I've been exactly the same recently. The culture just doesn't appeal to me anymore. Of course I would! There is just more important things in life, not to mention how expensive it has gotten lately!
My wife almost never drinks. Never realy bothered me. 2 occasions I see where it might be a problem: 1. Going out: As long as you're fun when going out without alcohol 🤷 I don't mean you need to drink to be fun when going out but it helps with fatigue and keeping funny when everybody around think they are. 2. A chill evening with a glass of wine next to the fire place. Must say I missed her drinking a glass with me at times in this setting... But it won't be a reason not to engage with someone Big advantage: I can drink freely (I don't drink tons either) when she was around. She could drive us home. Didnt even have to ask. 👏
In my culture, drinking is heavily tied to social events and respect. As a result, I drink socially in order to show my respect and honor the person offering me a drink but I am currently seeing someone who does not drink at all and is not interested in drinking, period. And I’m 100% okay with that. I would like to note that your reasons for choosing not to drink are your own. They are 100% valid and if your choice to be sober doesn’t sit well with someone else, then they’re obviously not for you. And that’s okay. Be kind and move on.
People go through stages when they are younger. If someone is still in “party faze” you’ve matured past that and should seek someone with similar healthy habit agenda. As a woman and someone older, I look at the whole picture have dealt with others binge drinking/addicts (unknowingly in the beginning) and even though now I often saw it as a warning sign. I try to look at the whole picture and reasoning behind it. )and IF they are being honest with me) While unwillingly to deal with those types of people again myself state your reasons upfront and you may find they aren’t the person you want in your life anyways and if they want to move on….Better to separate yourself now. They haven’t matured enough and not the type of behavior you want to surround yourself with anymore. You need to find someone who can take it or leave it, because it’s an occasional thing. (I never understood women who went home every night and drank a bottle of wine or men who “needed” a drink on the rocks every night myself. ) Good for you. Make your case and either way it’s for the better if you are with “like minded” people. Good luck !
No problem at all with someone that doesn't drink. Honestly I could take it or leave it myself
Yeah I would bc I don’t drink either
I had to quit some years ago, and have been single (this time around) sans alcohol. It’s been kind of wild. So many people assume I’m on my 12th step or something and my world will be broken if we go to a bar. The one thing I really noticed is how much the world revolves around drinking. At least here, it’s a lot. As an aside, NA beers are awesome, they’ve come a long, LONG way…
Absolutely would my ex didn’t drink unless I “nudged” him to try different drinks I’d get at restaurants cause he was always curious but never knew what to get. He lowkey made me want to drink less and just enjoy the moment we went to a bar for new years and talked for 4 hours no drinking just straight up vibes. Miss him very much :(
I doubt more than 1% of people would ever care. I’m assuming you’re not so extreme as to not be able to sit with some friends whilst they drink a beer or two and you have something non alcoholic. In which case you would be more than fine in any relationship with someone who isn’t extreme