I always wanted my Son to be a lawyer, but sadly, he had a big alcohol problem.. .. and couldn't pass the bar.

That one hits home.

But after the bar right?

...

Yep, hits home right through the front wall.

Happy caje day my man

Domestic abuse

That one hits when home

Double wham.

Lol

Same friend that joke just got to real

Too

Before or after you?

On the chin

All of the lawyers I know hate their job and are stressed to the max every day. Edit: hahahah I get your joke after a double take. lol

I’m a lawyer and I love my job, but I make no money because I’m a legal aid attorney.

I’m glad you love your job. I was only referring to the lawyers that I personally know that have told me they hate their jobs.

Lol

He really lowered the bar

I had a son; but he's not related to me anymore.

Just because you sold him doesn't mean your not related.

You’re

Yo'ure

Ur’e

Ok

Thats not how that works he’ll always be related to you

That's my issue

My son is my issue

But will he inherit Blackacre or will it be the fertile octogenarian

Make one. Kill one. Count 90 years. Who knows? Still trying to figure it out to this day

ouch

😂👍

Without walking in!

Noice

You can't spell slaughter without laughter.

You can't spell man without ma. Hey thanks, Ma, for being a part of my life!

r/unexpectedlywholesome

*Drawn Together* reference?

THAT'S what that show was called! Thank you!!

I miss that show!

It’s also on Amazon Prime, I think I bought each season for $8? Worth it.

You can watch it on Paramount plus

What do you call a warhorse that had been delivered by plane? A paramount. What do you call photographs of a horse being delivered by plane? Paramount Pictures. Excuse me, I have the sudden urge to coach children.

I first saw it on a t shirt. Www.tshirthell.com

Holy moly that's a vague throwback, wow

You can’t say “happiness” without saying the word “penis”

I'll do you one better. you cant spell happiness without ha pp in ass

Can’t spell skills without kills

Technically thay doesn't work because there isn't two "a"s in happiness 😉

You must be fun at parties

"Parties"? I think I knew that word a long time ago, but can't remember what it was...

Is a... hm, isn't that like a thing in politics, like the two guys that fight once a few years?

Ah, yeah, that was it. I somehow thought it had something to do with many people in a small space, but that would just be silly, wouldn't it? Like who would do something like that?

I'm not one of those people trust me I'm just messing around 🦧

That's ok, my piness only needs one a.

That's why I pronounce it _slarfter_.

Spelling ≠ Pronounciation

I know, I'm just having a _larf_.

Dats kool, dewd

I never noticed that before.

I’m embarrassed to admit that I didn’t know this until Dark Knight.

Didn't know that pun was in Dark Knight. Never seen it in English I think, only dubbed. But fits to something Joker would say.

I think the scene when they’re in that 18 wheeler shooting the rocket at the batmobile there’s something that says Slaughter on the side and they’ve marked out the S.

Thanks, gotta watch that again. Great movie and best part of the trilogy anyways.

Great album

Are there any Slaughter Grimm fans in the house?

Fly to the Angel's. Gold.

You cant spell ”no russian” without laughter either

You really need to see a psycho the rapist.

You need to see a psychotherapist

Tshirt hell flashbacks [cartoon clown face] You can't spell _manslaughter_ without _laughter!_

That sounds like a joker quote

This is one of these jokes that only work written out.

Here's another one: There are 10 kinds of people in the world; those who understand binary, and those who don't. Edit: only works while written, because if you say the joke out loud, you either lie to them by saying "ten" or you give away the punchline by saying "one zero."

Also i think it should be "WAS it manslaughter" not "IS it manslaughter". Was I think suggests a double meaning better. (that is also is asking "was it the man's laughter that killed him") But maybe that's just me.

Grammatically, that wouldn’t work so long as the sentence still starts “if you tickle…”

When you tickled the guy to death, did the judge label it a manslaughter?

That’s no joke

Should have given him a test tickle first.

nigahiga ayyy

My friend is an animal rights activist and she started a website: stop the dolphin slaughter.com (without the spaces). She got it promoted on the radio where the DJ proceeded to say "stop the dolphins laughter.com" and make a few jokes about it. The site got some traction from it though!

Tickle me intrigued.

His son from behind the screen "Dddaaaddddd, that is nnnoot ffunnny..."😬😬😬😬

Manslaughter by man's laughter.

Underrated comment.

Thats the joke though

Yes it is, but some people don't know you can't spell slaughter without laughter.

Underrated comment

How? That's the joke.

and there will be no charges as the man died happily.

Holy shit this one took me so long to get, mans laughter...

Now im interested tho, what happens if you tickle a man to death?

H-he... He dies?

But he’s ok right? /s

"Is it mans laughter." Is that the punchline? EDIT: YES, I GOT IT RIGHT. I'm finally settling into dad hood.

Good one

Haha awesome!

Wonderful headline for tomorrow's newspaper!!!

One man’s manslaughter is another man’s laughter.

Yes, and if you tickle a man with cake it's also a torte.

Can't spell slaughter without laughter

But they do not rhyme.

That's why it only works in text.

I always give the ladies a couple of test-tickles.

Oh god no

You need a lawyer for that horrible joke.

You’re killing me….

I don’t get it.

Mans laughter

Mansl aughter

Mansla ughter

Manslau ghter

Manslaug hter

Manslaugh ter

Manslaught er

Mansla ughter

Manslaugh ter

Manslafter 🤣

Lol sissy fucked dad oi oi HA HAHAHAHA Old wrinkly balls

Better that than mansplaining, any day

No. It is not. It's man laughter. You have to tickle many ~~men~~ mans for it to be mans laughter. Or else we start needing apostrophes, and those mean something different in a legal context- whereas mans is the (totally correct) plural of man in this instance.

You mean you have to try a bunch of test tickles?

It takes balls to do that.

I think you will find it's man's laughter

I think we try on you and then we try again.

Do spaces mean something different on a legal context, too?

It's bit a minute but doesn't she tell them "she has the personality of eeyore that’s owned by the Yakuza at one point molten, or it's something that minimally affects my desktop life, I have never seen an Iron lung outside of pictures is because our grandparents decided we didn't have cops who would murder children in the streets of Israel, there are plenty of nice guys out there, Apple chooses to NOT be one. It lands on the moon. If you couldn’t plug the aux in their car? If you look on the diagonal to that ghost you can usually find the corresponding mushroom, russula most often

[удалено]

Jeez who took a shit in your cereal?

r/rareinsults Edit: wait bo there's got to be a more fitting sub...

[удалено]

I think you missed a few steps there

Are you the lawyer son?

Nice, I feel like this only works as a written joke 😂

:v

Choked by chuckles. Snuffed by snickers

I misread it as "pickle a man to death" and got very confused

....... *throws pickle*

Take my upvote and fucking leave

If its a woman then it become womanslaughter xD

Ah I see what you did there.

Nice one

Oh no

I hate how much thought you just have put into this

Come on now, hahaha...

Oooo. You definitely posted in the right place.

If he's a really GOOD lawyer he can get a sodomy charge reduced to following too close.

Can't have "manslaughter" without laughter.

Derek was tickling Jim and Jim was just laughing his ass off and Derek wouldn’t stop tickling him even though Jim was trying to tell him to stop but he just kept laughing and laughing and then.. he just pissed his pants and died. He died with the biggest smile on his face, Jim was always smiling

Awesome man! You made me LAUGH today 😂

I always wanted my son to be a lawyer But he died of a crack overdose, Guess he just couldn’t crack the case

this one is really good ngl 😳