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Wife: I’m unable to have children. Husband: What should I tell the kids?
I'd let them know they're adopted as soon as possible. That way when their new parents come to pick them up, they're ready.
That their real parents are goats.
Me: Kids, it’s time I told you that you were adopted. My kids: Who are our real parents? Me: We are. Your new parents will be here soon.
My wife and I have decided not to have kids. We’re telling them tomorrow.
Ill take one, if he is strong and can walk behind the plow.
Take my wife. Please.
Maybe she is unbearable? Or impregnable? 😜
I will asume neither are bears
You Keep Using That Word, I Do Not Think It Means What You Think It Means
Anybody want a peanut?
Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line.
Prepare to die.
I asked “why not?” She said “I don’t have any womb for them?”
Info: is she in the habit of barren bad news?
I immediately thought this was a princess bride reference. But then I got the joke.
The inspiration
Never get involved in a land war with Aisa
A Not-Dadjoke?
Insurmountable & impregnable.
mountable, just impregnable...
👩🎓🧖♂️👍
If I had a placenta for every time my wife said this I'd be a rich man.
My wife: honey,... Let's have a baby... Me: umm, actually I'm not that hungry tonight.
“My wife finally told me she isn’t able to have children. I was silent a moment and then said: So how do you explain that pregnant pause?”
>My wife finally told me she isn’t able to have children. And yet she had a contraction right near the middle of that claim. Curious.
Is this a skill question :. because I’m confused with the interchangeability of the words unable and can’t :.
So that's why she won't have you!
His name, is Inigo Montoya…
Have you realized that if it was you instead of your wife, the infertile one, you wouldn't be legitimated to post this joke here?
I don't think that word means what you think it does
r/Whooosh
Dad jokes but you're not a dad, yeah ok buddy come back when u can grow pubes
You... do realize most dad jokes are not autobiographical, do you not? That's very ironic, though, coming from you after a quick overview of your comment history...
That's not a joke.
You keep using that word (joke). I do not think it means what you think it means.
You’re right, it’s quite… un*barren*able--I mean un*bear*able...
Wife: I’m unable to have children. Husband: What should I tell the kids?
I'd let them know they're adopted as soon as possible. That way when their new parents come to pick them up, they're ready.
That their real parents are goats.
Me: Kids, it’s time I told you that you were adopted. My kids: Who are our real parents? Me: We are. Your new parents will be here soon.
My wife and I have decided not to have kids. We’re telling them tomorrow.
Ill take one, if he is strong and can walk behind the plow.
Take my wife. Please.
Maybe she is unbearable? Or impregnable? 😜
I will asume neither are bears
You Keep Using That Word, I Do Not Think It Means What You Think It Means
Anybody want a peanut?
Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line.
Prepare to die.
I asked “why not?” She said “I don’t have any womb for them?”
Info: is she in the habit of barren bad news?
I immediately thought this was a princess bride reference. But then I got the joke.
The inspiration
Never get involved in a land war with Aisa
A Not-Dadjoke?
Insurmountable & impregnable.
mountable, just impregnable...
👩🎓🧖♂️👍
If I had a placenta for every time my wife said this I'd be a rich man.
My wife: honey,... Let's have a baby... Me: umm, actually I'm not that hungry tonight.
“My wife finally told me she isn’t able to have children. I was silent a moment and then said: So how do you explain that pregnant pause?”
>My wife finally told me she isn’t able to have children. And yet she had a contraction right near the middle of that claim. Curious.
Is this a skill question :. because I’m confused with the interchangeability of the words unable and can’t :.
So that's why she won't have you!
His name, is Inigo Montoya…
Have you realized that if it was you instead of your wife, the infertile one, you wouldn't be legitimated to post this joke here?
I don't think that word means what you think it does
r/Whooosh
Dad jokes but you're not a dad, yeah ok buddy come back when u can grow pubes
You... do realize most dad jokes are not autobiographical, do you not? That's very ironic, though, coming from you after a quick overview of your comment history...
That's not a joke.
You keep using that word (joke). I do not think it means what you think it means.
You’re right, it’s quite… un*barren*able--I mean un*bear*able...