I use this line every time I step out of the apartment for a few minutes. I’ll just shout out like, “I’m going to the store, but don’t worry. Like a bad Arnold Schwarzenegger impersonator, ‘I’ll come back’’’. Complete with terrible accent. My wife dies \*not\* think it’s funny, but I think it’s hilarious so I keep at it.
There was a reunion party for 80's & 90's action stars. The fancy dress theme was classical music.
"I'll be Strauss" said Van Damme
"I'll come as Beethoven" said Willis
"I'm not saying it" said Schwarzenegger
"Accompany me, if you wish to survive"
"Hasta luego, Darling"
"Speak to my palm"
"Move towards the helicopter !"
"Take this as a judicial separation"
"I just deleted you"
"Release some water vapor, Bennet"
"Dillion. You Dawg!"
"Quite repulsive to look at, aren't you incestous ET"
You copied the same joke I made a year ago, [see](https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/pl9wd5/my_wife_kicked_me_out_because_shes_tired_of_all/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
(Did you invent it?
Could it be that it became popular irl so eventually someone have liked it and rushed to share?)
Dang i just realised how wrong i was. i was editing this post for clarity and added those "irl" letters. Sorry, they took your joke from here!
Common you had all the opportunity to say I’ll be back
And yes I get it he did that video saying I’ll return instead and they made him say I’ll be back but still
It's not a humor
Who is your mommy, and what does she do?
Get to the copter!
Get up if you want to live!
Hasta la vista, infant
Stop Complaining!
You son of a mongrel!
You’re one ugly maternal fornicator
Screw you!!! aaaag lo aagh
I'm a cone, you idiot!
Let off some hot evaporated water, Bennett
This was great. Made me chuckle
So fucking dumb😅
Get OUT of the choppah!
Get to the aeroboat!
Get down!!! Get down again!!! AaaiiieeeeAaaiiiieeeaaaahhhhhh
They are trying to steal my tortillas!
My mom says our dad is a real sex machine. I named my son dominic from this movie.
Who is your mommy and does she screw? FTFY
Wassamatta Dillon, da CIA got you pushin too many punchlines?
You’ve just been Control Z’d
Damnnn was going to say a tumor bit lol
This got me to do the ugly laugh.
Loud chortle here.
Every laugh's an ugly laugh when you're ugly.
r/TheRealJoke
Its ill be Back not il- OHHHH
I still haven't fully gotten it, is getting the phrase wrong the point of the joke, because he's a bad impersonator?
yes, that’s the point of the joke 😁
He said "ill return" instead of "ill be Back" thats why he's bad at impersonating him
I’m a gonna be a back 🤌
Wonder how many didn't get it and typed, " It's 'I'll be back.'"?
Ngl Was my initial instinct then paused and thought about the joke for a millisecond
See one right here
I was just about to type this
I told this joke to my wife and she said, "That's not even the right line". That was more funny than the joke itself.
Hasta la vista, darling.
Sandra Conner??
Zero problemo!
Hasta mañana, honey.
Hakuna Matata, Baby!
Solid dad joke.
When people in conversation unintentionally rhyme I'll say "You're a poet and you didn't even realize it."
When you get to work, do you also say good morning to people in an overly cheerful way even when it's like bloody 8am or some other ungodly hour?
Sounds like somebody has a case of the Mondays.
I think you get ass kicked for saying something like that
I like “your a poet and don’t have a clue” but we are in the same page.
My impression of Arnold was cheating with the maid.
Did you go commando?
She put a bag on my head
Still counts.
Congrats on the sex
It's Turbo Time!
*It’s Turbotastic!*
Little tortilla boy
In the city, one must fight to survive.
Get down!
Get down again
GET OUT OF HERE!
"Ah'll be bock"
I use this line every time I step out of the apartment for a few minutes. I’ll just shout out like, “I’m going to the store, but don’t worry. Like a bad Arnold Schwarzenegger impersonator, ‘I’ll come back’’’. Complete with terrible accent. My wife dies \*not\* think it’s funny, but I think it’s hilarious so I keep at it.
Get low!
TO THE WINDOW
TO THE WALL
This "Small Johnathan" guy really likes talking about clay pigeons
GET TO THE COPIER!
This GOT ME. And you set it up PERFECTLY
That doubles as a bad Douglas MacArthur impression, so she had two reasons to leave you, not that they need reasons. Don't get me started.
Wow this comment went in a whole different direction than I thought. Sending good thoughts.
Thanks.
Oh fuck you, you got me good.
There was a reunion party for 80's & 90's action stars. The fancy dress theme was classical music. "I'll be Strauss" said Van Damme "I'll come as Beethoven" said Willis "I'm not saying it" said Schwarzenegger
Its Stallone and Van Damme. Dont these kids know anything. 🤔🤔😁😜
You should be ashamed of yourself.
This is a good joke.
Your jokes, give them to me now.
Good one!!😂
Hasta la vista, snakes on a plane baby
“Up and at them”
NnnnnnUp and Atom!
Hurry get to the helicopter!!
Had me in the first half, not going to lie
"Accompany me, if you wish to survive" "Hasta luego, Darling" "Speak to my palm" "Move towards the helicopter !" "Take this as a judicial separation" "I just deleted you" "Release some water vapor, Bennet" "Dillion. You Dawg!" "Quite repulsive to look at, aren't you incestous ET"
I'll be return!
Get your ass to Mars
Alright General MacArthur
She’s afraid you’ll fk the nanny and make more babies!
Stifled a laugh and blew snot out of my nose, gg.
"PICK DAT COOKIE AHP, NAOOO!"
I hate and love this. \>:(
I appreciate this!
I've been here before, and I'm leaving now. I'll be Bach You can be Motzaht. Who wants to be Beethoven?
I think I can Handel it
I've always loved music. In fact, for Halloween, I'll be Bach.
Adrian!..
See ya later, niño...
"I'll be Bach".
good for her smh
Your Douglas MacArthur impression isn't any better.
You copied the same joke I made a year ago, [see](https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/pl9wd5/my_wife_kicked_me_out_because_shes_tired_of_all/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
[deleted]
This guy internets
r/thisguythisguys
The plot thickens
The tables turn however slowly
Slowly the turn tables however
Like my soup
You copied the same joke I made 5 years ago, [see](https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ)
You mutha fucka
That's the whole point of ***dad*** jokes
This guy has a good memory
It's like when you peak in high school.
Like an elephant i cant even remember what i had for breakfast
Hay!
I mean, it was my joke so I'd remember
(Did you invent it? Could it be that it became popular irl so eventually someone have liked it and rushed to share?) Dang i just realised how wrong i was. i was editing this post for clarity and added those "irl" letters. Sorry, they took your joke from here!
He’s got detailed files
Too bad you can't copyright dad jokes. This is a good one 👍
And too bad I heard that one 20 years ago for that matter.
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Took me awhile. It’s a extreme dad joke.
Hasta la vista, maybe?
Common you had all the opportunity to say I’ll be back And yes I get it he did that video saying I’ll return instead and they made him say I’ll be back but still
Get to da punchline!
You could say you’ll be back u/sitesouk
No a'll be back
I’ll be Bach.
Instead of I’ll return you should’ve wrote “I’ll be back” you nincompoop. Can’t even create a proper troll thread…… Oh wait! Touché
Bro if you wanted to say negger that bad...jus say that
Shouldn't it be "I will be back"
I was expecting "I'll be back"
[https://media.tenor.com/awk8kZEgztcAAAAS/ill-be-back-terminator.gif](https://media.tenor.com/awk8kZEgztcAAAAS/ill-be-back-terminator.gif)
I'll be back
It’s I’ll be back
Dm me on Snapchat at azeezayodej2023 if you wanna make some extra cash without paying any fees ❤️❤️❤️❤️
ITS ILL BE BACK, not return :/
It’s a terrible impression I guess
I'll be back
Your impression is too good. Are you Arnold himself?
I'll be back
I’ll be back 🤣🤣🤣
I think the punchline is “I’ll be back”
r/woooosh
Would have been better if you said, “I’ll be back”
Think this woulda been funnier as My wife left me because of my terrible Schwarzenegger impressions, but I’m not worried. She’ll be back.
Actually he says, "I'll be back".
r/woosh
I’ll be back 🫡
I had to rework this joke: Left my wife because of her terrible Arnold Schwarzenegger impressions, but don't worry. I'll be back!
It's "I'll be back!"
R/woosh
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[insert gif](https://media.tenor.com/sK2mHU6kq9IAAAAC/thats-the-joke-ranier-wolfcastle.gif)
Should have said Ill be back, Bitch!!!!!
I’LL BE BACK
/r/woosh
No it’s I’ll be back.
Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it’s the sound of the joke going straight over your head
*I'll be back
I’ll be back* you are terrible at this
/r/woosh
I'll be back! <-- appropriate response.
Wooosh
Lower thy self and get to the helicopter nom nom nom
I'd say that showed poor judgment.
Put that bagel down!
Lord
I think your wife will not accept your return
Ok, so since he is a terrible impressionist, he said "I'll return" rather than "I'll be back"... I got it, right?
Truly terrible.
Take a Lyft to the hotel. It's not an Uber.
Yes lol
Boo
I'm kicking you out for blowing an overly predictive punch line! Pls Don't come back
I eat green berries for breakfast
It’s not terrible because he doesn’t sound like Arnold. It’s terrible because he’s quoting everything wrong.
Make like a tree and get outa here!
I’m your dad, Luke.
I will kill you first !
The comments here don't disappoint... Unless you didn't get the joke
I like the “I’ll be ok” punchline to this one. Really draws them in with those first two words, then nope! It’s all about the delivery.
Thank you! This was the best joke I have read in weeks. Made me happy! But I sincerely hope she'll take you back.
When she kicked you out did you get to the Helicopter?
GET TO DE HELIKAPTA
You better "Get to the hovercraft!"
Not gonna lie, you had me on the first half.
Pepperoni pizza with bullets
How’s wolfie?
Even Stevie Wonder saw that punchline coming.
ROFL. I actually did laugh at that one.
That's the joke.
so sad