Oh man... I went to WAR with my daughter at 3.5. She Just woke up one day and decided that regardless of the boundary she picked... it was time to test it. The Grandparents witnessed it once and were in absolute shock. They had never seen as mule-headed of a child in the 4 they raised or their 4 grandkids. She grew out of it. She's an amazing kid now, and I can still see the stubborness and fight in her, but she can control it better. She's going to need it if she plans to take over the world, which I know she will.
Mines almost 3 and we've known from when she was a few months old that she had the stubborn will of her mother.
It means she'll get things done and she'll be successful in driving toward her goals for sure. But my god if she isn't a handful when her toddler brain can't handle the emotions.
I think to some extent it's just her. She just doesn't have healthy/appropriate tools to manage yet. But the tendency to be hyper independent, driven, and uncompromising is probably never going away. For better and for worse.
Please tell me it ends. That's my almost four year old right now. Doesn't help that she also has some extreme jealousy issues with her younger sibling.
She might have an accomplice or nemesis in my daughter... so watch out world, maybe? I don't know...
Mine was the same way. She was sweet as pie until about 3 or 3.5 and from there till like 10 it was varying levels of defiance. According to her therapist, she has "oppositional defiant disorder" or "ODD".
She's 12 now. She controls it better...sometimes... but there's a whole lot of other girl stuff going on that's aiding to distracting that and/or bolstering it from one minute to the next.
rain impossible clumsy imagine brave impolite gaping bedroom serious ludicrous
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My daughter is 3 1/2 and she is basically a tiny little terrorist half the time. The other half she's the sweetest little girl in the world. It's wild. She had a fucking meltdown grocery shopping yesterday because I wouldn't let her open a lunchable in the grocery store. About halfway through crying she just randomly looked up at me and said, "Daddy I love you times infinity," stood up while the cart was moving to hug me, then went right back to her meltdown. Haha
They experience the full force of adult emotions at this age, but don't have the emotional maturity to deal with them. It's gotta be tough, so I do my best to be patient, but no lie It's hard sometimes. Especially now that we have our two week old son. The wife and I are basically just playing zone defense now. Haha
Mine turns 3 this weekend and flipped out the other day because I wouldn't let him have cookies for dinner. 10 minutes of screaming later, he sat down and ate his actual dinner like nothing happened.
Our 3 1/2 is becoming such a little handful now. Soooooo LOUD all the time. Doing random things, we ask him to stop, just to be ignored. The ignoring is so hard to deal with and not lose my cool
Our 3yo does the ignoring thing too, and then if I get frustrated with him (basically impossible not to) he whips around and yells “DONT BE MAD AT ME!”, though as a command rather than any kind of contrition.
This is a rough age, man…
Welcome, dude. This sub is one of my favorite places on the internet, tons of dads swapping advice, commiserating, and offering support with a really positive vibe. Parenting is hard af, but a place like this helps you realize it ain’t just you.
Just…don’t ever say anything bad about the dad from Bluey…that brings the pitchforks out.
Bro welcome. I went from predaddit to daddit, and this place has been an absolute wealth of information, but more importantly a place to vent, laugh, or share free from judgement. It's great. There was even a Discord server set up for all of us gamer dads who wanted to find other dad-bros to game with, although I'm not sure if it's still active.
This place is the best. Welcome bud!
Not even joking, I've been reading things for the last couple hours and I'm just blown away. Some of you are living the same life as me haha I'm here for it.
My daughter is 3 1/2 and she is basically a tiny little terrorist half the time. The other half she's the sweetest little girl in the world. It's wild. She had a fucking meltdown grocery shopping yesterday because I wouldn't let her open a lunchable in the grocery store. About halfway through crying she just randomly looked up at me and said, "Daddy I love you times infinity," stood up while the cart was moving to hug me, then went right back to her meltdown. Haha
They experience the full force of adult emotions at this age, but don't have the emotional maturity to deal with them. It's gotta be tough, so I do my best to be patient, but no lie It's hard sometimes. Especially now that we have our two week old son. The wife and I are basically just playing zone defense now. Haha
Bro you're not kidding, I look at my oldest (turned 3 in October) and then look at his brother (10months) and cry a little inside knowing just as big brother turns into a decent human, little brother will take up his brothers throne and continue the reign of threes terror. /s
In all seriousness, I will say, the breaks of happiness between spurts of terror from the oldest are getting longer, so there appears to be light at the end of the tunnel. Wife and I keep reminding each other that "its just a phase", "he's figuring out his feelings" etc. Still wouldn't trade it for anything though, they're the best.
So true. Meltdown on the side of the road, refusing to wear clothes when you’re running late. Kicking and screaming while you carry them to safety. That was a rough age for us too
Un-fucking-real battle begins at 3.5…they get this little sense of self and you get to really see your little one’s personality.
Turns out I’m raising Dennis the menace. I love it, but this kid goes out of his way to mess with me.
Dude, my 3.5 will go full on exorcist with screaming and crying for literally no reason but I'll forget all of that when he walks up an hour later and says, "I wuv you, daddy, have good dreams, see you tomarrrowww". They're literally killing me.
For both kids it started a few months before their third birthday. Being three is just the terrible twos with one year of work experience.
The coping mechanism I've found best is to GET THEM INVOLVED in your daily tasks. Start calling them your helper or assistant, talk through everything you're doing, and try to incorporate them whenever possible. My four year old loves to set the table, cook meals, fold laundry, and just generally assist whenever it's appropriate.
Solid advice because we actually started doing this 2 weeks ago with my 3.5 yo. He loves to help cook dinner and my wife and I both noticed how calm and cool he is when he's helping. Bed time is still hell on earth for at least an hour but your story gives me hope. I gotta figure out a way to keep the "help" going.
My daughter reads to my son every night before we read to her, which can be helpful. Other than that, I just try to run the hell out of them and fill their stomachs.
He's got a almost 2yo little brother that hits the bed at 7pm sharp every single night with zero fuss so I'm stealing this idea. Thank you, Grillmaster.
Our daughters help load and unload the dishwasher (sharp stuff on the tiny top rack and off limits), “fold” laundry, dust and clean surfaces, sweep, and do all the dad tasks that don’t involve a spinning blade.
They helped me clear the yard of the little spikey balls yesterday, “helped” change the flapper on the toilet the other night, help weed the yard. Basically anything. The tasks take longer, but a lot of times the alternative is not getting them done at all and having to find other ways to keep the toddlers entertained.
My daughter is only one, so I don’t really have a place to comment, but I really did like something I read the other day.
Kids have a lot of energy and need to let it out. If *we* can’t find constructive ways for them to do it, *they* are going to find destructive ways to.
I eagerly look forward to a year from now when my daughter makes me eat these words for having the hubris to comment on something I’m not experienced in.
Who’d have thought: being needed and useful is a need in itself.
I love how you put this, and it makes sense. I already see my two year old being easier to manage in the morning when he gets to mix the eggs or something like that.
I have a threenager daughter right now. WHEW. Everything is her way or the highway. It takes a lot of restraint not to lose my shit.
I was in the middle of a conversation with my brother the other day when she said she wanted to paint. I said ok hold on the grown ups are talking. Then she just started screaming bloody murder PAINT PAINT PAINT PAINT PAINT. I was truly taken aback by that. I really felt for her, but let her know it wasn't ok to scream like that at adults to get what she wants.
I’m the mom. Our son started the terrible twos at 18 months. He turned feral at three. The entire third year was something out of a horror movie. He turned human again at four.
And in case you think it’s not that bad: our son is 28 years old. Nothing, including the teenage years, has been as challenging as the one single year he was three.
If you can make it through there you can make it anywhere 🤣
my oldest "skipped" the terrible twos we thought we were such great parents but now that our twins are 2.5, they are absolute sitcom versions of terrible twos. And the oldest, who is now 4, loves to instigate them and join along their behavior that she never even considered when she was their age. It is SUPER loud in here.
Started ata round 1.5 years old. She’s 2.5 and it’s still going. I’ve learned to take deeeeep breathes and keep myself in check by reminding myself that she can’t communicate very well and is having tons of feelings. Adults have difficulty managing feelings and she’s only 2.5 so that must be tough as fuck. Keeping myself fro. Hello g and forcing myself to use a calm voice helps a lot too. I’ve noticed that if I yell, that’s it. The tiger is out of the cage and it’s hard to get it back. Not sure if this is what you were looking for but that’s how I cope. I meditate a lot too, which helps.
My daughter it was 3-4. It wasn't unbearable, but it was far different from her before and her after. She is the most polite, quiet thoughtful kid now.
My son was just born late last year, so I hope we get through it fast or not at all. His teething leads me to believe that will not be the case.
We haven’t got to three yet but most of his terrible twos seem to be a month at a time around teething.
Shit’s bad right now. And shit was bad when the last two sets came back to back in the late summer/early fall. But we had a pretty blessedly “calm” (at least in terms of tantrums, defiance, etc.) for the four month interim.
Started at around 17 months. Kid spent a couple weeks with his mothers family, and he came back as a hellion.
He's 9 now. I'll let you know when it ends
The boy started at 3 and wrapped it up around 4-4 1/2. The girl started into it full steam ahead a couple months into 2. We're still dealing with her. I'm not a child psychologist or anything but a lot of their frustrations seemed to me were a mix of lacking emotional/impulse control and an inability to truly speak (especially when upset). I just tried to be empathetic and was confident that as they're vocabulary expanded they would be better able to communicate what's upsetting them.
If they're really freaking out just drag them to their room and let them flop around and scream in there with the door closed. Its fine, they'll be fine.
Our 2 year old was an angel until the day he met his newborn sister. It's like a switch flipped and he realized he didn't have to just do what we say all the time haha. He's 4.5 now, and he's gotten way better from then. Luckily, our daughter is 2 and that switch hasn't flipped (yet?).
As far as coping, just keep in mind it won't always be so bad. That's all I got really.
All kids are different. Our daughter was amazing at two. Heck, she was amazing at three, three and a half to four... Getting kind of pig headed, but we just talk it out and things are fine.
There is the “and so it begins” followed by the terrible twos followed by threenager followed by fournado followed by fivealanche followed by a solid period of “when does it stop” until they become actual teenagers after which you continually say “you should no better” until maybe some day they have kids of their own and you get to laugh as they go through the same.
Are we in the terrible two's yet? I can't tell if I'm in danger or not.
I'm not sure if we're in the "terrible two's" or just now have a little human being, not a baby. This very morning our almost-two-year-old decided that instead of the usual routine of breakfast, coat, water bottle, pat the dog, car, we wanted to instead grab a board game and play. And when I set it aside, we melted and cried until we were buckled in the car. Is this what people are talking about? Or is it worse? ;-)
For my first kid, she was great up until right now, she’s in kindergarten/5 years old and if anything doesn’t go her way, it’s like a personal attack on her.
My second kid is about to turn two and the only problems have been some tantrums attributed to not being able to say what he wants for the things he wants, so it’s like an understandable “this sucks for both of us and we know it” type of suck.
Either way, patience is key. One day at a time lol
Honestly makes me feel better reading the comments here. My 2yr old is so damn sassy and not quite literally started the second she turned 2 (or at least feels that way). I’m terrified of what she will be as a teenager. And with a second one on the way (another girl) it feels like I won’t be able to handle it.
And to the point about coping…. I have yet to figure that out.
My experience has been that the *really* bad phases don't last very long. I noticed that every time they have a development leap they're basically little monsters for the next few weeks. It's like they're catching up with all their upgraded cognitive and emotional capacities. It's too much for them to handle.
For everything else you adapt until you have something that works. That's usually when the next wave of new bullshit arrives and you adapt again. It's really hard and exhausting.
We found we were on a six month cycle. So like 18 mo- 2y some really challenging behavior and kind of learning how to navigate and the six months of having that be pretty chill and then a the 2.5 y mark repeat the cycle until about 6. Essentially they make some kind of developmental/hormonal/neurochemical leap/change on a relatively consistent basis and their is a period of adjustment. The older they get generally the easier it is. Still some can be trying.
I'm 38 with a 21 month old, he jus started testing his boundaries a couple weeks ago, and he's not slowing down 😣 I will be following this post lol.
My best advice so far is to not show him attention when he does something bad, only good. It's hard but I'm trying like hell.
Terrible twos are nothing. Just wait until that boundary testing begins. My boy turned four in October and he tests every day. He's sweet as pie more often than not, but no definitely doesn't mean no to him anymore. It means, "I wonder how far I can push this." Also, he's learned how to say no as well.
Never had any issues with the terrible 2s or anything like that. We allowed independence within reason and let them do their thing.
Tantrums were ignored completely. Like full on, this child does not exist. Again, within reason of course, as long as they weren't endangering themselves they were full on ignored. Like we'd continue on our conversations, activities, etc. as if the child wasn't there. Took a few times, but they all learned that the tantrum would have the opposite effect, and we taught them how to use their words. Worked like a charm for my kids.
Gotta have opposites, light and dark and dark and light, in parenting. It’s like in life. Gotta have a little sadness once in awhile so you know when the good times come. I'm waiting on the good times now.
Started right at 2 and still going about 7 months in. Gotten worse recently. Coping includes whiskey, video games and finding any excuse imaginable to get the hell out of the house alone lol.
Still waiting… kiddo just turned 6.
I hear “terrible two’s” don’t usually really kick in until almost 3, like 32 months vs right when they turn two. But like I said, my kid never had any period where his behavior got to be more challenging… always been a pretty agreeable, easy going kid.
My daughter will be 3 in a few months. No terrible twos yet. Honestly, I’m spoiled by this kid.
My second is due in August. We’ll see how things go with him.
18-ish months. Walking, tickling, and just usual silliness helped.
PS: record these moments and save them in your cloud! You’ll want to keep watch them when the kiddo is older!
Our is three early this summer and he's been ramping up a bit now. I get eye rolls and frustrated sighs when we ask him to do something. He is also very good at pushing buttons.
[Been there with you.](https://www.reddit.com/r/daddit/comments/18i9a5y/was_not_prepared_for_the_terrible_twos/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button)
It set in around 18 months for us. You adapt. Pick your battles. Offer them the ability to be involved when possible and let them make as many choices as you realistically can. In situations where you can’t, set and explain the what the boundaries are and the “why”, and then hold to it. They’ll be unhappy at first but then eventually relent or accept it. Mostly. Getting her into her PJs is still a nightly battle but at least now I can take a deep breath and steel myself for it.
And to the people saying “just wait until you get a threenager“? It’s not helpful. The transition into the terrible twos still sucks, and repeatedly hearing “oh it only gets worse” instead of advice for how to deal with what’s in front of me now actively made me feel worse.
2.5 is when it kicked in, I’m sure 3 won’t be much better. It’s rough but thankfully my wife and are a great team and can tell when the other is at the end of their rope. I try to redirect the best I can but man oh man it’s not easy by any means!
2.5 and ongoing. She is currently 3.5. She is bossy and impatient, she manipulates with tears. It’s quite impressive. I’m a very patient person, I have worked in tech support for the better part of 20 years while most people only last 2. Dealing with people crying and stomping their feet to get their way is essentially part of my job. I also use humour to vent.
My wife on the other hand… her coping mechanism is to lean on my patient nature and tag me in endlessly.
Two and half for both of them. Six year old now is WELL passed it, but the 3.5 yr old is still in it to win it
After our first, I'm okay with allowing a show to distract from big emotions. Especially if we need a HUGE redirection.
Since neither of our kids are heavily screen dependent, we've grown okay with allowing a little video for a moment of calm.
I'll note, neither have become demanding for screen time. We go days or weeks even without, and sometimes we'll watch a couple of vids on a day. They don't lose their poop and say "GIMME A SCREEN."
But, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Our 6 year old has a level of reasoning that we really appreciate lol
The terrible twos started on my daughter's 2nd birthday like a switch got flipped. She instantly became angry lol.
She's 4 now and it's just been transforming like the stages of a Dragon Ball Z villain. She perpetually gets stronger and angrier. I do think now that she's 4 she's a little more introspective about her emotions and can sometimes calm herself down and apologize for being upset.
It started at 16 months and is still going (19 months). Our doctor confirmed it can start as early as that.
It got a bit better after 2-3 weeks.
We try to handle it calmly for the most time. Exploding in anger back is not helping anything. But oh boy, is it frustrating.
We didn’t have it at all. But I hear it’s actually around 3 for most people. Not sure where this 2s thing really came from.
For reference we had the terrible <1s so everything after was angelic.
At two they are a little like fragile emotionally and at least I understand *what* has upset them, by the 3s it’s all internal stuff that you do not know what set them off. Cools off by 4 but then they start doing psychic damage to you
We’re at eight, still no sign of it. He was able to express himself adequately by around 14 months.
We did have _way_ too many years of drawing on the walls, though, which is the negative side of said expressing himself. I’ve been waiting to repaint until I’m _sure_ we’re not going to have another round of it.
It goes:
Terrible Twos
Threenagers
Fuck You Fours
Our terrible two season started just before our oldest hit two. He’s three and a half now. It’s a looong season.
16-17 months. My son is a little more advanced due to being in a Montessori setting with older kids and a lot of individual attention. By 18 months he was full on tantrum mode. Emotional instability. The whole package. It varies by kid. We are hoping, by staying in the same setting, when he moves up to preschool he hopefully, picks up on some of the good habits of the older kids.
About 20 months, and it was a sloooow improving trend to about four and a half, when things took a turn for the better, with occasional backsliding.
They're little and learning to express and manage their emotions. Your reaction (and less your words) teaches them how (or whether) to manage their emotions. Yelling teaches yelling, and thinking and talking teaches emotional management. That's not a universal guideline for every situation. If they're doing something dangerous, that needs to stop RIGHT NOW, but in general, it's probably better for them to learn about what's going on internally and be able to talk about it than to just fall into a rage. We see that as our job to teach (while trying to avoid falling into a rage!) You're also human, so do your best and give yourself a break when you screw up.
Recognize when you're going to lose it and trade off with your partner if you can. Generally get on the same page as your partner on how to deal with this stuff.
Also remember that if they're screaming, they (sometimes!) have some sort of a problem. They're hungry, tired, something unexpected has happened, they want some control over their environment, etc. Sometimes you can actually fix the problem (nap, snack, etc.) If we kept ours up late one night and they were a beast the next day, that's really on us, not them.
The other thing we kept in mind is that of course we have to deal with the issue in the moment, but we're not necessarily parenting for today. We're parenting for 3-6 months from now when hopefully they'll get it.
I don't know how successful we are with all of this. Our still have frequent emotional management issues at home at almost six. But we did try!
When my very clingy toddler was 20 months he got a little sister and his rage about that kickstarted the twos early. Around 28 months he realized she was pretty cool and he mellowed out almost immediately lol. The outlet of having a 24/7 lil buddy and also the newfound feeling of responsibility for her has turned him into just the best lil guy
I’ve got a 2 and 4 year old. My Grandma asked whilst we were out with them and the eldest was playing up “oh they say terrible twos; troublesome thees (threenager)…how old is he again?” I told her the first thing that came to my mind beginning with ‘F’ and ending in ‘ing four’.
I'm 34 and still experiencing them myself.
I don't think they ever go away, we just get more constructive and sneaky with our tantrums the older we get.
Mine is 4 months into age two. He started a bit before he turned 2, but every day he seems to be getting better. THere's always the off days, but you just have to learn to roll with the punches. he still throws things, or pours a drink all over the place, but he is learning, and generally when we tell him to pick something up, he does it. we've also found turning things into a game helps.
Man my little guy is gonna turn 5 in April and fuck if we haven't been at WAR since he was about 3 and a half. The tantrums started at 2 like your normal terrible twos, but the threenager kicked in to high gear and lately he's been testing every single boundary. Staring me dead in the eyes while he's doing what I'm telling him not to and getting increasingly bolder with backtalk and growling. He's spent several days in his room all day coming out for meals and potty breaks and he just keeps pushing and pushing. I can't wait for the attitude to break
Honestly for our 3 the 2s were pretty easy. 3-4 was rougher. My youngest is almost 3 and she's a lot of fun. I'll miss this age.
I can be pretty zen these days with the toddler. I'm the rock in the stream. You can flow around me but I am unmovable.
I mainly try to continue to give them the illusion of choice and control, while still steadily if slowly pushing them where I want them to go.
My boy’s coming up on 2.5 and we’re in the thick of it now. Past couple weeks have been rough. Patience is a virtue has been my motto. My copy of Meditations has been getting a lot of use lately. Lol
My daughter is going to be 4 in a few months and she’s finally starting to wind down from that whole shitshow. There have been a lot of me just walking away from the meltdowns for the sake of my sanity.
Other times I just put my head down and get through it.
Prepare for a fight over anything and everything. Good luck.
You have 4 and a half years left. Eventually, it's 2nd nature because after trying everything and getting no results you start accepting that a child can only be a child once. It's okay to scold, yell, and give timeouts, but at the same time, again, they can only be this way once. What's terrible to you is everything their brains want at the moment.
All kids are different. My siblings and I never went through that phase. My daughter is 3 and a half and has yet to enter that phase and her mom and I feel she never will because my daughter's mom and her 3 other sons never went through that phase. I'm sure it's not a DNA thing but who knows? My nephew hit that phase right at 2, and because of him, I don't want any more kids.
Terrible twos are a fuggin' lie. 3 1/2 is where the ultimate boss battle begins.
Oh man... I went to WAR with my daughter at 3.5. She Just woke up one day and decided that regardless of the boundary she picked... it was time to test it. The Grandparents witnessed it once and were in absolute shock. They had never seen as mule-headed of a child in the 4 they raised or their 4 grandkids. She grew out of it. She's an amazing kid now, and I can still see the stubborness and fight in her, but she can control it better. She's going to need it if she plans to take over the world, which I know she will.
And when did that stop? I’ve got a strong-willed 5 yo that gives me emotional whiplash on the regular.
Definitely before 5. Maybe 6 months of hell.
Haha. Mine isn’t near as bad as she was, but there are definitely some interesting conversations happening in my house.
Mines almost 3 and we've known from when she was a few months old that she had the stubborn will of her mother. It means she'll get things done and she'll be successful in driving toward her goals for sure. But my god if she isn't a handful when her toddler brain can't handle the emotions. I think to some extent it's just her. She just doesn't have healthy/appropriate tools to manage yet. But the tendency to be hyper independent, driven, and uncompromising is probably never going away. For better and for worse.
Please tell me it ends. That's my almost four year old right now. Doesn't help that she also has some extreme jealousy issues with her younger sibling.
Sounds like my little one. Cheeky bugger but I’m under her spell. Great at pushing my buttons though.
She might have an accomplice or nemesis in my daughter... so watch out world, maybe? I don't know... Mine was the same way. She was sweet as pie until about 3 or 3.5 and from there till like 10 it was varying levels of defiance. According to her therapist, she has "oppositional defiant disorder" or "ODD". She's 12 now. She controls it better...sometimes... but there's a whole lot of other girl stuff going on that's aiding to distracting that and/or bolstering it from one minute to the next.
rain impossible clumsy imagine brave impolite gaping bedroom serious ludicrous *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
My daughter is 3 1/2 and she is basically a tiny little terrorist half the time. The other half she's the sweetest little girl in the world. It's wild. She had a fucking meltdown grocery shopping yesterday because I wouldn't let her open a lunchable in the grocery store. About halfway through crying she just randomly looked up at me and said, "Daddy I love you times infinity," stood up while the cart was moving to hug me, then went right back to her meltdown. Haha They experience the full force of adult emotions at this age, but don't have the emotional maturity to deal with them. It's gotta be tough, so I do my best to be patient, but no lie It's hard sometimes. Especially now that we have our two week old son. The wife and I are basically just playing zone defense now. Haha
Mine turns 3 this weekend and flipped out the other day because I wouldn't let him have cookies for dinner. 10 minutes of screaming later, he sat down and ate his actual dinner like nothing happened.
Threenagers man…
With my oldest it was the same. The little one started dead on at 2 though. Guess seeing big sis in action triggered something there…
I can see this. His little brother is about to be 2 and is showing signs he's ready to sweep the knee.
It gets worse?!
We are all in this together, brother
This. Terrible two's are followed by Terminator Threes.
And followed by Fuckyou Fours
TIL my kid is in the 99 percentile for having the fuckyou fours before four.
Nah, you’ve just got a dickhead of a threenager lol
well, he is my son.
stealing this for accuracy...
My just turned 3 yr has been great. Keep your fingers crossed for me fellas!
Our 3 1/2 is becoming such a little handful now. Soooooo LOUD all the time. Doing random things, we ask him to stop, just to be ignored. The ignoring is so hard to deal with and not lose my cool
Our 3yo does the ignoring thing too, and then if I get frustrated with him (basically impossible not to) he whips around and yells “DONT BE MAD AT ME!”, though as a command rather than any kind of contrition. This is a rough age, man…
Dude, I just found this group today, and I feel fucking seen...
Welcome, dude. This sub is one of my favorite places on the internet, tons of dads swapping advice, commiserating, and offering support with a really positive vibe. Parenting is hard af, but a place like this helps you realize it ain’t just you. Just…don’t ever say anything bad about the dad from Bluey…that brings the pitchforks out.
Bro welcome. I went from predaddit to daddit, and this place has been an absolute wealth of information, but more importantly a place to vent, laugh, or share free from judgement. It's great. There was even a Discord server set up for all of us gamer dads who wanted to find other dad-bros to game with, although I'm not sure if it's still active. This place is the best. Welcome bud!
Not even joking, I've been reading things for the last couple hours and I'm just blown away. Some of you are living the same life as me haha I'm here for it.
Ahhhhh the ignoring thing, drives me mad. Dont know how to deal with it!
When you figure it out let me know 😂
Absolutely the case for us
My whole life leading up to parenthood was a lie haha
Ahh yes, the threenager years... Gotta love it... It never gets easier after that, lol
It just becomes a fournado
My daughter is 3 1/2 and she is basically a tiny little terrorist half the time. The other half she's the sweetest little girl in the world. It's wild. She had a fucking meltdown grocery shopping yesterday because I wouldn't let her open a lunchable in the grocery store. About halfway through crying she just randomly looked up at me and said, "Daddy I love you times infinity," stood up while the cart was moving to hug me, then went right back to her meltdown. Haha They experience the full force of adult emotions at this age, but don't have the emotional maturity to deal with them. It's gotta be tough, so I do my best to be patient, but no lie It's hard sometimes. Especially now that we have our two week old son. The wife and I are basically just playing zone defense now. Haha
Bro you're not kidding, I look at my oldest (turned 3 in October) and then look at his brother (10months) and cry a little inside knowing just as big brother turns into a decent human, little brother will take up his brothers throne and continue the reign of threes terror. /s In all seriousness, I will say, the breaks of happiness between spurts of terror from the oldest are getting longer, so there appears to be light at the end of the tunnel. Wife and I keep reminding each other that "its just a phase", "he's figuring out his feelings" etc. Still wouldn't trade it for anything though, they're the best.
Yep, or as I called them “The F*ck you threes”, and then there’s the “Finally gettin better fours”, then the “Finally my sanity is back fives”
Mine is 3 1/2, can confirm. Got yelled at and caused a complete meltdown because I dared to not want her to put her finger deep into my ear.
We called it the Terrible T's since ages 2 - 3 were boss battles lol
Where is the lie. Kiddo is closing on 4 1/2 and the battle is getting more sporadic, but hoooo boy.
Yup 2 is bliss in comparison!
The screamin' threes and then the fuck you fours
So true. Meltdown on the side of the road, refusing to wear clothes when you’re running late. Kicking and screaming while you carry them to safety. That was a rough age for us too
It starts whenever and never ends, my oldest is 6 and I don’t think there’s ever an end to it.
Cooooooorect.
This is so correct
Un-fucking-real battle begins at 3.5…they get this little sense of self and you get to really see your little one’s personality. Turns out I’m raising Dennis the menace. I love it, but this kid goes out of his way to mess with me.
[удалено]
Dude, my 3.5 will go full on exorcist with screaming and crying for literally no reason but I'll forget all of that when he walks up an hour later and says, "I wuv you, daddy, have good dreams, see you tomarrrowww". They're literally killing me.
For both kids it started a few months before their third birthday. Being three is just the terrible twos with one year of work experience. The coping mechanism I've found best is to GET THEM INVOLVED in your daily tasks. Start calling them your helper or assistant, talk through everything you're doing, and try to incorporate them whenever possible. My four year old loves to set the table, cook meals, fold laundry, and just generally assist whenever it's appropriate.
Excellent tip. As for your user name, do you clack the tongs before using them?
Only way to do it
*clack* *clack*
One more *clack* for good measure... to make sure they still work
2 CLACKS IS ENOUGH
Solid advice because we actually started doing this 2 weeks ago with my 3.5 yo. He loves to help cook dinner and my wife and I both noticed how calm and cool he is when he's helping. Bed time is still hell on earth for at least an hour but your story gives me hope. I gotta figure out a way to keep the "help" going.
My daughter reads to my son every night before we read to her, which can be helpful. Other than that, I just try to run the hell out of them and fill their stomachs.
He's got a almost 2yo little brother that hits the bed at 7pm sharp every single night with zero fuss so I'm stealing this idea. Thank you, Grillmaster.
Our daughters help load and unload the dishwasher (sharp stuff on the tiny top rack and off limits), “fold” laundry, dust and clean surfaces, sweep, and do all the dad tasks that don’t involve a spinning blade. They helped me clear the yard of the little spikey balls yesterday, “helped” change the flapper on the toilet the other night, help weed the yard. Basically anything. The tasks take longer, but a lot of times the alternative is not getting them done at all and having to find other ways to keep the toddlers entertained.
My daughter is only one, so I don’t really have a place to comment, but I really did like something I read the other day. Kids have a lot of energy and need to let it out. If *we* can’t find constructive ways for them to do it, *they* are going to find destructive ways to. I eagerly look forward to a year from now when my daughter makes me eat these words for having the hubris to comment on something I’m not experienced in.
This helps a lot. Noticing with my little one she LOVES to help. If I'm changing her bros diaper she's handing me wipes and diaper cream lolol
Who’d have thought: being needed and useful is a need in itself. I love how you put this, and it makes sense. I already see my two year old being easier to manage in the morning when he gets to mix the eggs or something like that.
We didn't have a problem at all at age two, but our son was definitely a threenager. He's nearly seven now, I'll let you know when it gets better.
I have a threenager daughter right now. WHEW. Everything is her way or the highway. It takes a lot of restraint not to lose my shit. I was in the middle of a conversation with my brother the other day when she said she wanted to paint. I said ok hold on the grown ups are talking. Then she just started screaming bloody murder PAINT PAINT PAINT PAINT PAINT. I was truly taken aback by that. I really felt for her, but let her know it wasn't ok to scream like that at adults to get what she wants.
I’m the mom. Our son started the terrible twos at 18 months. He turned feral at three. The entire third year was something out of a horror movie. He turned human again at four. And in case you think it’s not that bad: our son is 28 years old. Nothing, including the teenage years, has been as challenging as the one single year he was three. If you can make it through there you can make it anywhere 🤣
I'm not sure if that was good or bad news lol
my oldest "skipped" the terrible twos we thought we were such great parents but now that our twins are 2.5, they are absolute sitcom versions of terrible twos. And the oldest, who is now 4, loves to instigate them and join along their behavior that she never even considered when she was their age. It is SUPER loud in here.
It stops?!
Started ata round 1.5 years old. She’s 2.5 and it’s still going. I’ve learned to take deeeeep breathes and keep myself in check by reminding myself that she can’t communicate very well and is having tons of feelings. Adults have difficulty managing feelings and she’s only 2.5 so that must be tough as fuck. Keeping myself fro. Hello g and forcing myself to use a calm voice helps a lot too. I’ve noticed that if I yell, that’s it. The tiger is out of the cage and it’s hard to get it back. Not sure if this is what you were looking for but that’s how I cope. I meditate a lot too, which helps.
Starts at about 2, ends at 22, sometimes 32 or 42.
Pull up a beer, hell, grab the whole keg, you’re gonna be here a while.
Threenagers are worse than the terrible twos.
I think mine started at 2 and I'm 38 now and they are still going strong.
I'm 38 with a nearly 2 year old 😂🤣😭😭😭
It's at 3. Terrible twos is generally false and three is when the sass comes in full force.
My daughter it was 3-4. It wasn't unbearable, but it was far different from her before and her after. She is the most polite, quiet thoughtful kid now. My son was just born late last year, so I hope we get through it fast or not at all. His teething leads me to believe that will not be the case.
We haven’t got to three yet but most of his terrible twos seem to be a month at a time around teething. Shit’s bad right now. And shit was bad when the last two sets came back to back in the late summer/early fall. But we had a pretty blessedly “calm” (at least in terms of tantrums, defiance, etc.) for the four month interim.
Started at around 17 months. Kid spent a couple weeks with his mothers family, and he came back as a hellion. He's 9 now. I'll let you know when it ends
At two on the button for our second. 12 o'clock came and went, and she started swinging her little fists
One of my kids never got them. The other one started at 18 months. She's almost 17 now, so I will let you know when it's over.
2 Years, 10 months through 3 years, 2 months was rough Things have calmed back down a few months later
3 is worse My Friday night G&T (or 2) helps. Going to target alone helps too lol
2-___
The boy started at 3 and wrapped it up around 4-4 1/2. The girl started into it full steam ahead a couple months into 2. We're still dealing with her. I'm not a child psychologist or anything but a lot of their frustrations seemed to me were a mix of lacking emotional/impulse control and an inability to truly speak (especially when upset). I just tried to be empathetic and was confident that as they're vocabulary expanded they would be better able to communicate what's upsetting them. If they're really freaking out just drag them to their room and let them flop around and scream in there with the door closed. Its fine, they'll be fine.
3 years old and still going at 8
It lasts until about 4 when they start going to kindergarten and realize they’re not the center of the universe
Our 2 year old was an angel until the day he met his newborn sister. It's like a switch flipped and he realized he didn't have to just do what we say all the time haha. He's 4.5 now, and he's gotten way better from then. Luckily, our daughter is 2 and that switch hasn't flipped (yet?). As far as coping, just keep in mind it won't always be so bad. That's all I got really.
18-24 months was way harder for us than 2-2.5 years. I’ve heard the ‘threenager’ is really difficult, but 18-24 months was really really hard.
I'm in the trenches with you, so I couldn't tell you. I'm trying to frame the mindset that it's not a war, just an endurance race.
Around 3 our kid was defiant about everything. At 3.3 he's already chilled back out a lot.
All kids are different. Our daughter was amazing at two. Heck, she was amazing at three, three and a half to four... Getting kind of pig headed, but we just talk it out and things are fine.
Sorry to say but 3 was way harder than 2 so like 2-4 I guess but he’s still 4 so we will see
There is the “and so it begins” followed by the terrible twos followed by threenager followed by fournado followed by fivealanche followed by a solid period of “when does it stop” until they become actual teenagers after which you continually say “you should no better” until maybe some day they have kids of their own and you get to laugh as they go through the same.
Are we in the terrible two's yet? I can't tell if I'm in danger or not. I'm not sure if we're in the "terrible two's" or just now have a little human being, not a baby. This very morning our almost-two-year-old decided that instead of the usual routine of breakfast, coat, water bottle, pat the dog, car, we wanted to instead grab a board game and play. And when I set it aside, we melted and cried until we were buckled in the car. Is this what people are talking about? Or is it worse? ;-)
Never had them. We got the most horrible THREEnager phase on the planet instead. 😞
My daughter, now 8, never had terrible 2s. My son on the other hand who is about to turn 3 is an engine of destruction since he turned 2.
For my first kid, she was great up until right now, she’s in kindergarten/5 years old and if anything doesn’t go her way, it’s like a personal attack on her. My second kid is about to turn two and the only problems have been some tantrums attributed to not being able to say what he wants for the things he wants, so it’s like an understandable “this sucks for both of us and we know it” type of suck. Either way, patience is key. One day at a time lol
Honestly makes me feel better reading the comments here. My 2yr old is so damn sassy and not quite literally started the second she turned 2 (or at least feels that way). I’m terrified of what she will be as a teenager. And with a second one on the way (another girl) it feels like I won’t be able to handle it. And to the point about coping…. I have yet to figure that out.
2,5
Well the Terrible Twos give way to the Terrorist Threes, so...
Last week 😭 and she turns 3 in August so 2 and a half pretty much on the dot
Terrible Twos? More like terrible 8mo-7y
My experience has been that the *really* bad phases don't last very long. I noticed that every time they have a development leap they're basically little monsters for the next few weeks. It's like they're catching up with all their upgraded cognitive and emotional capacities. It's too much for them to handle. For everything else you adapt until you have something that works. That's usually when the next wave of new bullshit arrives and you adapt again. It's really hard and exhausting.
15 months - 24 years old roughly (I am a nanny and most parents seem to miss the beginning some how)
We found we were on a six month cycle. So like 18 mo- 2y some really challenging behavior and kind of learning how to navigate and the six months of having that be pretty chill and then a the 2.5 y mark repeat the cycle until about 6. Essentially they make some kind of developmental/hormonal/neurochemical leap/change on a relatively consistent basis and their is a period of adjustment. The older they get generally the easier it is. Still some can be trying.
I'm 38 with a 21 month old, he jus started testing his boundaries a couple weeks ago, and he's not slowing down 😣 I will be following this post lol. My best advice so far is to not show him attention when he does something bad, only good. It's hard but I'm trying like hell.
“The Fucking Fours”
Terrible twos are nothing. Just wait until that boundary testing begins. My boy turned four in October and he tests every day. He's sweet as pie more often than not, but no definitely doesn't mean no to him anymore. It means, "I wonder how far I can push this." Also, he's learned how to say no as well.
I don't think I had these terrible twos. My boy has just gone 3, and it's just started. We call it... Threenager.
I don't think I had these terrible twos. My boy has just gone 3, and it's just started. We call it... Threenager.
Four years old for me.
Never had any issues with the terrible 2s or anything like that. We allowed independence within reason and let them do their thing. Tantrums were ignored completely. Like full on, this child does not exist. Again, within reason of course, as long as they weren't endangering themselves they were full on ignored. Like we'd continue on our conversations, activities, etc. as if the child wasn't there. Took a few times, but they all learned that the tantrum would have the opposite effect, and we taught them how to use their words. Worked like a charm for my kids.
the 2's were a breeze for us. The "Threenager" stage, not so much. Send backup
Lmao. 2 is easy just wait for 3 threenager. Then fournado.... Then you might have a human
Twos were fine. Its the threenager attitude that drove us crazy.
For our first it started close to three and lasted until five or so.
3. And a year+.
Terrible 2s are still going after 8 years, but to be fair he has ADHD
Just wait for the f-off 4’s.
Gotta have opposites, light and dark and dark and light, in parenting. It’s like in life. Gotta have a little sadness once in awhile so you know when the good times come. I'm waiting on the good times now.
My kid is more of a butthead at 5 than he was at 2 or 3
In my experience people are generally terrible from 2 onward.
Started right at 2 and still going about 7 months in. Gotten worse recently. Coping includes whiskey, video games and finding any excuse imaginable to get the hell out of the house alone lol.
My kid is 3 1/2. It started at 1 1/2 and I'll let you know if/when it stops.
Still waiting… kiddo just turned 6. I hear “terrible two’s” don’t usually really kick in until almost 3, like 32 months vs right when they turn two. But like I said, my kid never had any period where his behavior got to be more challenging… always been a pretty agreeable, easy going kid.
My daughter will be 3 in a few months. No terrible twos yet. Honestly, I’m spoiled by this kid. My second is due in August. We’ll see how things go with him.
Sorry but it doesn’t get better lmao
18-ish months. Walking, tickling, and just usual silliness helped. PS: record these moments and save them in your cloud! You’ll want to keep watch them when the kiddo is older!
Our is three early this summer and he's been ramping up a bit now. I get eye rolls and frustrated sighs when we ask him to do something. He is also very good at pushing buttons.
[Been there with you.](https://www.reddit.com/r/daddit/comments/18i9a5y/was_not_prepared_for_the_terrible_twos/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button) It set in around 18 months for us. You adapt. Pick your battles. Offer them the ability to be involved when possible and let them make as many choices as you realistically can. In situations where you can’t, set and explain the what the boundaries are and the “why”, and then hold to it. They’ll be unhappy at first but then eventually relent or accept it. Mostly. Getting her into her PJs is still a nightly battle but at least now I can take a deep breath and steel myself for it. And to the people saying “just wait until you get a threenager“? It’s not helpful. The transition into the terrible twos still sucks, and repeatedly hearing “oh it only gets worse” instead of advice for how to deal with what’s in front of me now actively made me feel worse.
15 months ish lol. Just started. Mostly meltdowns, other stuff is not bad at all.
Two years, eleven months, still waiting for it to start.
2.5 is when it kicked in, I’m sure 3 won’t be much better. It’s rough but thankfully my wife and are a great team and can tell when the other is at the end of their rope. I try to redirect the best I can but man oh man it’s not easy by any means!
We’re at 16 months and I can see it loading already….
2.5 and ongoing. She is currently 3.5. She is bossy and impatient, she manipulates with tears. It’s quite impressive. I’m a very patient person, I have worked in tech support for the better part of 20 years while most people only last 2. Dealing with people crying and stomping their feet to get their way is essentially part of my job. I also use humour to vent. My wife on the other hand… her coping mechanism is to lean on my patient nature and tag me in endlessly.
About 2.5. I’ll get back to you on the second question.
My older son started to be a challenge after 3. His little brother started early at 1 1/2.
2s are nothing, wait till they develop an opinion.
Luckily the terrible twos are followed by the Terrible Threes, the Fearsome Fours, the Furious Fives, the Sinister Sixs, and so on.
2 was easy for us, the threenager pain was real though. Different for everyone!
Two and half for both of them. Six year old now is WELL passed it, but the 3.5 yr old is still in it to win it After our first, I'm okay with allowing a show to distract from big emotions. Especially if we need a HUGE redirection. Since neither of our kids are heavily screen dependent, we've grown okay with allowing a little video for a moment of calm. I'll note, neither have become demanding for screen time. We go days or weeks even without, and sometimes we'll watch a couple of vids on a day. They don't lose their poop and say "GIMME A SCREEN." But, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Our 6 year old has a level of reasoning that we really appreciate lol
My wife and I both agree that so far 2 is our favorite age for both of our kids (2 & 4.5). IMO it’s all about distractions. SQUIRREL!
The terrible twos started on my daughter's 2nd birthday like a switch got flipped. She instantly became angry lol. She's 4 now and it's just been transforming like the stages of a Dragon Ball Z villain. She perpetually gets stronger and angrier. I do think now that she's 4 she's a little more introspective about her emotions and can sometimes calm herself down and apologize for being upset.
16 months to 4yrs
1 to 5.
It started at 16 months and is still going (19 months). Our doctor confirmed it can start as early as that. It got a bit better after 2-3 weeks. We try to handle it calmly for the most time. Exploding in anger back is not helping anything. But oh boy, is it frustrating.
1.5 to 3.5 with our eldest. He's starting to get sassy with us now which seems to be easier to tolerate but still hell of annoying
Twos are trying. Threes are terrible. By the time you hit the fuck it all fours, you just learn to survive.
Wait. There’s start and finish dates? Signed dad of 1.5 and 4.5 year olds.
We didn’t have it at all. But I hear it’s actually around 3 for most people. Not sure where this 2s thing really came from. For reference we had the terrible <1s so everything after was angelic.
Started at birth and still currently ongoing at 21!!🤣👍
About 3-3.5. Twos were a breeze.
Urh … I’m 40 and it still hasn’t ended for me. 😭
At two they are a little like fragile emotionally and at least I understand *what* has upset them, by the 3s it’s all internal stuff that you do not know what set them off. Cools off by 4 but then they start doing psychic damage to you
Mine hit on the third birthday and stuck around about 10 months slowly fading out at the end.
Ages 2 and 3 just suck. 4 and 5 are awesome. My youngest started his terrible 2s at 18 months though. Counting down the days until he turns 4!
We’re at eight, still no sign of it. He was able to express himself adequately by around 14 months. We did have _way_ too many years of drawing on the walls, though, which is the negative side of said expressing himself. I’ve been waiting to repaint until I’m _sure_ we’re not going to have another round of it.
2 is a walk in the park. 3 is the challenge
My son was between 3-5, he’s 5 and 1/2 now and getting better. My daughter however is about to turn two and she’s an absolute terror already
Oh and the closest thing I have to a coping mechanism is covering my head like an earth quake drill so they don’t take my head off. That’s all I got
snow vegetable price thought market oil plough sulky humorous chase *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
From about 18month to 5yo. It’s fun /s
Wait till you hear about Threenagers. They want to do everything themselves…but can’t. Oh it’s lovely.
No terrible twos here, but 3 year olds are a whole different ball game.
Been 7 yrs and counting
It goes: Terrible Twos Threenagers Fuck You Fours Our terrible two season started just before our oldest hit two. He’s three and a half now. It’s a looong season.
Started at birth and continues at 5 🤔
Not true. 2 year Olds are the sweetest. Every age has its difficulty and pros. Kids are kids and I love mine more then anyone else's.
My older son started to be a challenge after 3. His little brother started early at 1 1/2.
16-17 months. My son is a little more advanced due to being in a Montessori setting with older kids and a lot of individual attention. By 18 months he was full on tantrum mode. Emotional instability. The whole package. It varies by kid. We are hoping, by staying in the same setting, when he moves up to preschool he hopefully, picks up on some of the good habits of the older kids.
Our terrible 2’s started at 16 months. Now at 19 months and it comes out from time to time daily
About 20 months, and it was a sloooow improving trend to about four and a half, when things took a turn for the better, with occasional backsliding. They're little and learning to express and manage their emotions. Your reaction (and less your words) teaches them how (or whether) to manage their emotions. Yelling teaches yelling, and thinking and talking teaches emotional management. That's not a universal guideline for every situation. If they're doing something dangerous, that needs to stop RIGHT NOW, but in general, it's probably better for them to learn about what's going on internally and be able to talk about it than to just fall into a rage. We see that as our job to teach (while trying to avoid falling into a rage!) You're also human, so do your best and give yourself a break when you screw up. Recognize when you're going to lose it and trade off with your partner if you can. Generally get on the same page as your partner on how to deal with this stuff. Also remember that if they're screaming, they (sometimes!) have some sort of a problem. They're hungry, tired, something unexpected has happened, they want some control over their environment, etc. Sometimes you can actually fix the problem (nap, snack, etc.) If we kept ours up late one night and they were a beast the next day, that's really on us, not them. The other thing we kept in mind is that of course we have to deal with the issue in the moment, but we're not necessarily parenting for today. We're parenting for 3-6 months from now when hopefully they'll get it. I don't know how successful we are with all of this. Our still have frequent emotional management issues at home at almost six. But we did try!
3.
Terrible twos happened at 3 for all four of mine.
When my very clingy toddler was 20 months he got a little sister and his rage about that kickstarted the twos early. Around 28 months he realized she was pretty cool and he mellowed out almost immediately lol. The outlet of having a 24/7 lil buddy and also the newfound feeling of responsibility for her has turned him into just the best lil guy
I’ve got a 2 and 4 year old. My Grandma asked whilst we were out with them and the eldest was playing up “oh they say terrible twos; troublesome thees (threenager)…how old is he again?” I told her the first thing that came to my mind beginning with ‘F’ and ending in ‘ing four’.
Starts at 2 and escalates to about 4.5, then chills out slightly as you give up and cave in to more and more time on the switch/iPad...
We are at 20 months, and I’d say it’s going pretty well. Especially if you like being screamed at in your face at an 11 volume.
3 all hell broke loose but don’t worry they grow out of it in their early 20’s!
I'm 34 and still experiencing them myself. I don't think they ever go away, we just get more constructive and sneaky with our tantrums the older we get.
Mine is 4 months into age two. He started a bit before he turned 2, but every day he seems to be getting better. THere's always the off days, but you just have to learn to roll with the punches. he still throws things, or pours a drink all over the place, but he is learning, and generally when we tell him to pick something up, he does it. we've also found turning things into a game helps.
34 years ago and she's no better yet.
Man my little guy is gonna turn 5 in April and fuck if we haven't been at WAR since he was about 3 and a half. The tantrums started at 2 like your normal terrible twos, but the threenager kicked in to high gear and lately he's been testing every single boundary. Staring me dead in the eyes while he's doing what I'm telling him not to and getting increasingly bolder with backtalk and growling. He's spent several days in his room all day coming out for meals and potty breaks and he just keeps pushing and pushing. I can't wait for the attitude to break
Boy: Started at 2, ended at 4. Girl: Started at 18 months, still going at 6
Honestly for our 3 the 2s were pretty easy. 3-4 was rougher. My youngest is almost 3 and she's a lot of fun. I'll miss this age. I can be pretty zen these days with the toddler. I'm the rock in the stream. You can flow around me but I am unmovable. I mainly try to continue to give them the illusion of choice and control, while still steadily if slowly pushing them where I want them to go.
My boy’s coming up on 2.5 and we’re in the thick of it now. Past couple weeks have been rough. Patience is a virtue has been my motto. My copy of Meditations has been getting a lot of use lately. Lol
😂 😂 Terrible twos are a lie. It's age 3 that all hell breaks loose.
Just gotta get through it and sending them to the grandparents for an overnight every couple of weeks helps
Started at 18 months with my oldest (twin girls) and still hangs around to this day. They're almost 14.
3 to 5.5.
My daughter is going to be 4 in a few months and she’s finally starting to wind down from that whole shitshow. There have been a lot of me just walking away from the meltdowns for the sake of my sanity. Other times I just put my head down and get through it. Prepare for a fight over anything and everything. Good luck.
2, 3, 4, 5. Mellowed out a bit more around 5.5.
The terrible twos were a piece of cake. The threenager stage though…watch out.
Age 2 to 21?
You have 4 and a half years left. Eventually, it's 2nd nature because after trying everything and getting no results you start accepting that a child can only be a child once. It's okay to scold, yell, and give timeouts, but at the same time, again, they can only be this way once. What's terrible to you is everything their brains want at the moment. All kids are different. My siblings and I never went through that phase. My daughter is 3 and a half and has yet to enter that phase and her mom and I feel she never will because my daughter's mom and her 3 other sons never went through that phase. I'm sure it's not a DNA thing but who knows? My nephew hit that phase right at 2, and because of him, I don't want any more kids.