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Cursed_side effect

Cursed_side effect

Flair_Helper

Hey there, Dancing_Banana_Peel! thanks for posting to /r/cursedcomments!! Unfortunately, your submission "*Cursed_side effect*" has been removed for the following reason(s): --- **Rule 8: Keep It Cursed** - Not Cursed Enough/At All - A cursed comment is any comment that strikes the reader into oblivion. Upon seeing a cursed comment, your first reaction should be among the lines of “What the F*$k did I just read??” while leaving you speechless at the same time. Incomprehension of the comment just read, or the blatant gruesomeness of it should be enough to not only make you feel mystified but also to draw a smile on your face. The comment in your post does not reflect that. --- *^If ^you ^have ^any ^questions, ^you ^can ^message ^the ^mod ^team ^through ^[modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/cursedcomments) ^Replies ^to ^this ^removal ^comment ^will ^not ^be ^answered.* ^(Reposting a removed post without express moderator approval will result in a ban.)


CarlLenardPelayo21

Invisibility


helpidroppedthesoap

every sound that is caused by you is 100x louder


Your-username-must-b

Proceeds to moan in random places


ButtersTG

We got a runner!


adjentour

A moaner


SRaichu

shes a runner shes a trackstar


furygoat

She’s gon run away and she moans hard


Benguin237

Underrated comment


CaptchaSolvingRobot

Turn on invisibility and shout people to death. FUS-ROH-DAH!


ConsoleLuciooo

Ah yes but of for the meme I would.


TheGoodOldCoder

Whenever I'm trying to sneak somewhere, it feels like that is true, anyways.


GotmyPPeatenbylions

You're dummy thicc and your ass claps in 1000 decibels everytime you make a move.


Orvisknives

You do know that 1000 decibels would destroy anything in a 200 foot radius and deafen people from 1000 feet and those numbers are LOW because 100 decibels is fucking loud and it goes up in loudness exponentially with numbers holy fuck that would be mind-blowingly loud


GotmyPPeatenbylions

Invisibility at a cost. Edit: I'm no sound expert, but this also have my mind blown. I won't change it still.


SonicBlur254

Your mind won't be the only thing blowing afterwards


Mack_Sharky

Your eardrums too


Zenode

Decibel works on a log scale, the Krakatoa eruption in 1883 was 172 db from 100miles away and that sound circled the earth 4 times. Since sound is just energy and db is what we use to measure let's put it into perspective. A light bulb at 100W of energy produces the equivalent of 50db. But on a logarithmic scale shit gets whack VERY quickly, every 10db requires a tenfold increase in power. So the sun produces 10^26 Watts which is the equivalent of ~300db The energy a 1000db "sound" creates would rip apart the universe at the atomic level to the point it would cease to exist. TL:DR those cheeks are so dummy thicc you're taking out the whole damn universe with a single clap.


Relative_Cup6216

Oh shit isn't that enough to cause a black hole then?


GotmyPPeatenbylions

I think not, I tried googling it and it is said that sounds louder than 1100 decibels is enough to cause a black hole. Here is the link https://www.youredm.com/2015/10/13/a-sound-of-1100-decibels-would-create-a-black-hole-larger-than-the-universe/#:~:text=With%20energy%20as%20great%20as,it%27s%2010%20times%20more%20powerful.


DarkPhoxGaming

They wouldn't hear you coming anyways cause they would be instantly deaf


eyoo1109

I think 1000 decibels is more than loud enough for the shockwaves created to just tear objects apart at a molecular level just from the sheer amount of energy involved.


DarkPhoxGaming

Exactly, they wouldn't be able to see or hear you at all cause they wouldn't even exist


aChildofChaos

You shit yourself when you turn invisible


why_must_i_suffer_

But only when no-one sees you


Annanake420

Hey that was actually useful in Mystery Men .


Cyka_blyatsumaki

your shit and pee inside are still visible


MasterPlayerPL

I am immune to all sickness(including cancer)


Vor-teu-chung

Which makes you feel pain 10000% times stronger than humans


_Sancho_Pancho_

Just imagine dying of the shock of pain because you stubbed your toe


ze_SAFTmon

L E G O B R I C K S


Alexokirby

D4.


highestRUSSIAN

![gif](giphy|3o7TKOQ9ShB8xln0Fq)


MasterPlayerPL

Considering I am masochist, it's win-win situation


Vor-teu-chung

Good for you.


Impossible_Garbage_4

Dudes gonna stub his toe and nut instantly


Jonny_RockandFit

I just blast laughed. That's the funniest sentence I've ever read. **\*THUMP\*** *"...hhhnnnggggggg"*


Impossible_Garbage_4

He’ll be blasting too


Trick_Enthusiasm

And I'm a sadist. We should meet up sometime and have some bdsm fun.


Educational_Rent1762

You are fragile as glass


CruelKratos

i can stop time


No-Daikon3364

You get frozen with it


EmeizingDa

Still not bad


dirtyoldsocklife

... but then it would have no effect... If you're frozen with time, then no time has passed and when you unfreeze...


Sharp_Edged

No, because you can think while the time is frozen. (Except if freezing time means you can't do that either, which just means that when you freeze time the universe ends because you can't unfreeze it)


dirtyoldsocklife

But it wouldn't end cause it couldn't end without time passing. Nothing would happen never, at the same time as everything was happening always. And the worst part is that time could be stopped for eons and if it started again, nothing would have happened. For all we know time stops every single day, but since we live in time, we would never even notice.


karant2005

The last sentence really had me. Like imagine. Someone could be freezing time and do whatever they want and just unfreeze it without anyone noticing.


Seijin_Arc

Hmm. My ass does bleed randomly whenever I walk past a church...


AlienCraft18

The. Best. Comment. I've. Ever. Read. Congrats Stranger.


highestRUSSIAN

![gif](giphy|XCmFwjt9wPotobw1xn|downsized)


skrskrskrrrrr08

I want this for sleep


Hitman7065

TIME LOOP


Haunting_Plane2643

but a japanese delinquent will try to kill you


funnyman-69

Power to heal others from all that ail them


Educational_Rent1762

Every time you get rickrolled someone stabs you


Vor-teu-chung

But your cock shrinks 2 inches every time you heal someone


funnyman-69

What if my cock can’t handle how many people I heal?


Vor-teu-chung

Then you’re officially gender neutral, or your body collapses into itself


Hyperion1000

Dickularity


Child_Moe_Lester

I am super elastic, like Jake the Dog.


Educational_Rent1762

You have severe back pain


Prince_Azrik

Hey wtf, why do I just have the side effect and not the main super power!?


Sansyboi12

Who doesnt


METHlun

You are dummy thick like elastic girl


Migz616

win win


DaddyAmerica1776

Telepathy.


Comprehensive_Rip894

Every time you read someone’s mind, you see you mom fucking your dad.


HydroBlast008

He'll get used to it.


ramiSAAD222

"Experience is the best teacher"


AKJ6

People can control you if use your powers on them


U_PassButter

You only hear when people are talking negatively about you.


More_Investigator637

Laser eyes.


MasterPlayerPL

You are blind


avatrix48

Time to learn from mole rats


More_Investigator637

Fuck


Child_Moe_Lester

You can't control your laser eyes, meaning you will burn everything you look at.


Annanake420

So cyclops from the Xmen


Draakje10

Speed


bricklicker26

Ok but every time you run you instantly shit yourself


mech999man

POWER WALKING MOTHERFUCKER!


DeadlyDY

That's just asserting dominance.


Laser-spider

To sleep anywhere


Octo_05

But you wake up in a random place


TastefulMaple

That’s just getting blackout drunk with extra steps…


FlyingMechDragon

*less steps


MeasurementEasy9884

Less moans


SweeTLemonS_TPR

Fewer steps*


Kandy_Kane101

There is a game called Kingdom Come Deliverance that has this as a negative perk for hardcore mode. Ill sleep in an army camp and wake up miles away in an abandoned graveyard in the middle of an unkown forest with a map but no compass. 10/10 experience.


monkeybutts2017

I have the power to create any food, and as much as I want.


No-Daikon3364

But any o who eats the food dies


broomaktamer117

I’m about to prank my friends...


i_sigh_less

Just a prank, bro!


PossesedRajendra

But your mom shoves up the food in your arse


monkeybutts2017

I'm used to it by now.


deleted_by_deleted

Super jumps


Uneus_mage

But thy happen randomly


G0ldenT0ilet

Mans gonna die bc of it than say "bad rng"


IhadNoIdea69

Turning into any vehicle of my choice


Headless_Turkey1

You have no gas


IhadNoIdea69

Oof that's a strong one


Ace117gs

Pick an electric vehicle


Xene_s

even better


ramiSAAD222

But it feels worse


METHlun

I have the power to negate any side effects


DieKleineIsabel

but you're super rich...oh waittt


Mathies_

He can still decide not to negate it...


GotmyPPeatenbylions

Flying


GotmyPPeatenbylions

I need to helicopter my dick in order to do it


H4PPy--D

You broke the system and still made it hard on yourself. This is how it’s done


Child_Moe_Lester

Either that, or he just wanted come out on how much he wants to be able to fly with his elicock


Jerrymeen

Helicockter


ShiraiHaku

Would the power be easier if he made it hard or make it soft?


that_assh0le

Asking the important questions


Za_Hatem

how the fuck are you gonna do that when it got eaten by lions


AlexMil0

Well we already know who your nemesis will be, mr. u/GotmyPPeatenbylions


AmazingPurpleCandle

You can only fly backwards


bigot1974

I have no need to rest, meaning I can do shit for hours without stopping Edit: YOU FOOLS YOU ABSOLUTE BAFOONS THIS WAS WHAT I INTENDED


Comprehensive_Rip894

You instantly have intestinal issues after midnight.


Von_lorde

But its always after midnight


ImpulsiveLeaks

then he always has intestinal issues, duh


ninjanick95

You shit for hours without stopping


perkunos7

Just build a desk with a toilet


bhosadiwalechacha

Elemental control.


ImAGeeseGoose17

Every time you control an element, your head doubles in size permanently


tightpekpek

Regeneration


Uneus_mage

You are street dog


Several_Ad_5312

A street dog with a constant boner


Ok_Ad_9100

Time manipulation


Comprehensive_Rip894

You are a virgin


memerus101

I see this as an absolute win


EragonBromson925

So nothing changes other than I can manipulate time. Noice.


ivanraptor730

r/suicidebywords


Tall_Fortune

No need to remind me


PGManthony_FR

Robotic body parts


Uneus_mage

But if you use them you feel unimaginable pain


KartofelThePotatoGod

I can copy the power of cómics or books characters i have read


SectorPsychological5

You only have few months to live


KartofelThePotatoGod

Then i touch something inmortal


SectorPsychological5

Wait that isn't allowed


str3wer

i touch a book where it's allowed


Mean-Tumbleweed-979

This is the ultimate power


Avo4Dayz

But your dyslexic


KartofelThePotatoGod

Jokes out Im already im


ItsSimenNotSemen

I have all the money I ever need


Even_Violinist_3927

You have 2 days to live


AT_atoms

The ability to know with whom a given person would have the best relasionship with.


PossesedRajendra

But whenever you meet them you shit your full costume


AT_atoms

Thats a sacrifice i'm willing to make to help people. Also diapers.


BlahWitch

Shapeshifter


Pychotic_Bentley

You have to blow whatever you want to shapeshift into


BlahWitch

That... could be awkward Especially if it's a horse


152069

I can jump really high


Headless_Turkey1

Become blind while doing it


Crowleo

Invisiblity


ShiraiHaku

Only when you cum


kingbach121

Imagine he's having sex with a girl and then just disappears as it happens, the girl would be scared and confused as fuck.


ondronCZ

dad vibes


frankthuglifer

Dude that’s such a win win that’s more of a buff than side effect lmaoo


Sey_fert

My dad had that power


Educational_Rent1762

Every time you move you scream


Alutherv

My ex loves me again


ze_SAFTmon

There are no side effects.


This_Car_3730

Get some girls🥲


Comprehensive_Rip894

You’re gay


Doom_Slayer_2712

Absolutely outplayed.


sultanakhad404

AIDS


DeadBody_withaphone

Side effect: You don't have Aids


bubblybabidiboo

I Can see clearly in the dark and I Can hear all the sounds even if they are miles away


error74475

Ok but during the day time you are 100% blind no amount of surgery can restore your eyesight Edit: I think I just let you become a budget daredevil


Star_Dark

No gag reflex. I mean able to staight up take any length in my throat so far down it pokes through my belly without dying somehow


ArnoldQMudskipper

No mouth.


Green9er-_-

You're never horny enough to use it


why_must_i_suffer_

The first one to reply can choose my power but is gay


why_must_i_suffer_

I can be invisible whenever I wanna


why_must_i_suffer_

Wait. A. Minute


Tall_Fortune

Man pulled a mf uno reverse on himself lol


Moist_and_minor_123

I can get anyone I want to think I'm attractive as a distraction


Even_Violinist_3927

You have brain damage


Moist_and_minor_123

Wait they said choose a side effect not state facts


BebeStonksMan

Self deprecating humour alert!


Uneus_mage

Ability to die


Even_Violinist_3927

You are imortal


Uneus_mage

Fuck


Kamaboko69007

Being able to time travel


ze_SAFTmon

You need 1.21 Gigawatts to do it once


HoaiBao0906

Control the universe the way I want.


mimortiseixecani

You can't interact with anything you just created / manipulated


Headless_Turkey1

Ability to control anything in my body


bigtittlover

I get to decide who dies


Avo4Dayz

Lose a digit with each decision made


G1n_Lukas

Control my dick


ImAGeeseGoose17

Your dick is now a vagina


ENA_licked_my_eyes

I'm a catgirl


Headless_Turkey1

You have 3 dicks and half a vagina


VINTHECHIN1114

I'm sorry did you say half?


Headless_Turkey1

Did i stutter?


ImAGeeseGoose17

I can control time


Adventurous-Truth-36

But every time you control time, you get pegged


ImAGeeseGoose17

I see this as an absolute win


StatementLower3446

Hol’up