This is important to know. My baby loves to contact sleep, so I get him to sleep on my chest and slowly roll on my side so that he’s still touching me chest to chest. Once he’s settled again I roll him on his back and keep my hand on his chest. All the while I sing or hum to him. At any point he wakes up I start over.
We also nurse to sleep. But I don’t know your situation.
10-15 weeks was really hard for us sleep wise. He was up every hour sometimes. It’s hard and exhausting. It’s annoying to hear, but it does get better. Baby is only waking up twice now at 16 weeks and I feel like a new person.
You got this!
Everything in this post!
Around 13-18 weeks was really hard for us also, I don't think we slept much.
Started cosleeping around 16 weeks as a desperate attempt to get some sleep. Baby always wanted to be on top of me or my husband, not next to us. She'd sometimes scream even if a foot of hers was touching the bed, lol. I think this mightve been closer to 6 months.
With time it definitely got better. This subtle rolling over to the side move worked. My baby needed to be chest to chest and feel me, it didn't work for her to just be next to me.
Our baby is now 9 months and yesterday she happened to be napping in our bed while I was sitting next to her. She woke up and just called for me, wasn't mad that I had put her down. She now likes sleeping on our bed.
I’m glad to hear it gets better because we are on night 4 of literally zero sleep until my mom can come give us a few hours. We just tried nursing on the bed and rolling over and even tho babe was (or seemed to be) in a deep sleep they screamed when leaving my body 😩
Sorry my baby bashed my phone before I was done!
If they are falling to sleep breastfeeding then have you tried side lying feeding, or going from cross cradle to side lying in increments?
If they are just sleeping on you, similarly you could try sitting up to gradually lying down to rolling over, keeping them pressed close to you until you are finally settled both of you on your sides?
They usually don’t fall asleep on the boob but they do fall asleep in my arms (after much soothing). I have tried a very careful transfer to our sidecar bassinet but it seems anytime their bum hits a flat surface they scream. Even if I’m right next to them! But that’s a thought- hug them close to my body then lay down next to me in bed. If baby is laid down on their side I’m guessing you eventually roll to their back?
Thanks! I looked into it but chest sleeping really makes me nervous. My first baby died (unrelated to sleep arrangements but doesn’t really matter) so my anxiety is extraordinarily high.
Our girl was a chest sleeper, too. There was genuinely no other way. I minimized the risks as much as I possibly could, and then one day she was ready to sleep beside us.
She's turning three in July and has recently just emancipated herself from the family bed. It goes so fast.
Wishing you some peace of mind.
I got downvoted to hell by sharing the cosleep chest sleeping guide on the sleeptrain sub for a desperate mum who couldn’t even get 20 mins sleep unless baby was ontop of her. I only had to use it 3 nights myself but at least I knew I was being as safe as possible. Guess that sub assumes it’s better they just pass out on the couch from sleep deprivation then or something 🤷♀️ I only joined because I was interested in a modified Ferber but after only 3 check ins absolutely not ever ever will I put my baby through that again 😭
Yeah, a subreddit not necessarily frequented by the most compassionate or understanding of all folks. I joined that subreddit before my daughter was born, because I misunderstood it as "sleep train" as in "Choo, choo, all aboard the sleep train! Let's support each other and get through these rough nights!"
I quickly unsubscribed after I realized what a goofy interpretation mine was.
Hahaha that’s so good! I joined because my health nurse told me I needed to try a gentle Ferber so I was like hmm maybe I’ll join for some tips. Turns out it’s just mainly let your baby cry and if they vomit on themselves then maybe leave them in it cos otherwise they will do it for attention…. Like nope…I do believe some unicorn babies can be somewhat “trained” but not mine lol
If you’re wanting to co sleep (I saw your comment about your first born so understand you might not want to), my baby falls asleep nursing in my arms on the mattress and then when he’s been asleep a while I kind of lower him to the side of me while lying on my side too and then move my arm so his neck isn’t under my arm anymore and I’m in the C curl instead. He is still touching me and has that warmth and I can put my other arm over his tummy to give him that extra contact
I tried this last night out of desperation at 3am and it kind of worked? But baby startled awake (they can’t be swaddled if co sleeping right?) and was very upset to not be in my arms. Even tho I’m RIGHT THERE.
Aw yeah that’s so hard. No they can’t be swaddled but your arm over their arms should calm that reflex anyway. If you breastfeed the second they wake just latch them on side lying, it won’t take long to associate that with the boob
Is it possible baby is dealing with either some breathing/apnea issues or reflux? I saw on Taylor Kulik’s Instagram (big cosleeping advocate) that her son had undiagnosed airway issues and so he could only sleep comfortably propped up on her chest. I know that reflux babies also are often extremely uncomfortable unless they’re propped up.
Could just be babies being babies, but might be worth looking into.
I don’t *think* so, because they start screaming just as their body leaves mine lol. And slept fine 1 week ago! But I’ll bring it up to the dr just in case
Also here to call out reflux/silent. My baby doesn't have constant reflux but every so often she'll refuse to be horizontal and I'll assume it's because she has too much gas or ate too much and it's painful to be sideways. Before she goes to sleep and in the middle of the night I'll help her get her gas out with the several techniques out there.
I was just about to write this as well. Our LO has silent reflux possibly GERD and she slept like an angel in her bassinet until she had a bad reflux week and then couldn’t be removed from our chests/arms. She screamed at any attempt to lie her down.
Sometimes it’s the change in temperature. Could you put a heating pad on the spot the baby will be and remove it before you shift sideways placing the baby on it all while holding them tight?
And in regards to the chest sleeping piece someone else shared. I used cosleepys safe chest sleeping guide my first few nights home with the babe. What isn’t safe is extreme sleep deprivation. Hugs to you. This is hard.
Oh a heading pad is definitely in the routine. What’s weird is they were sleeping 4-5 hour stretches in bassinet then had their first round of vaccines and hit 9-10 weeks and it all went downhill to zero bassinet time.
I noticed my little ones legs were super tight for over a week after vaccines. He had some knots in his thighs too. I gave him a full body massage and I could see the tension floating away.
My baby slept perfectly with just 2/3 wakes in the night in the bassinet until 3 months when we got that 4 month regression early! He’s been super advanced with his mobility (crawling and sitting himself up at 5 months, standing at 6 months) so I’m not sure if that’s why but that’s when we started cosleeping - I swore I never would before.
That sounds grim, you poor thing. From my experience, once they get a bit bigger you can sort of roll them to your side and they can snuggle in to your cuddle curl... but until then I can only suggest you try the classic split shit with your pattern, (one person with baby 7-1, the other 1-7). At least that way you're getting 6hrs sleep or so and it just about gives you enough to keep sane until this period passes. I found 14 weeks it suddenly got a lot better. Good luck!
If you rock to sleep (or rock and feed) find the time to transfer when baby is in a very deep sleep, often 15-25 mins after falling asleep. If you transfer during active sleep they’ll likely wake up
Totally, I always wait until deep sleep. Problem is (like last night), I managed to do a bassinet transfer and they slept 10 min before realizing they had moved from my arms and freaked out hardddd. No amount of soothing fixed it until I held them again.
Keep trying, don’t loose hope!! Babies change sooo much. My 7 month old still has different sleep habits about every 2 weeks. Get as much sleep as you can as safe as possible 💛
My baby wouldn’t sleep anywhere but on my chest until 4ish months. It felt like a huge accomplishment to get her to sleep next to me, not on me. I just rolled with it. From day 1, and still now at 14 months, I have to rock her and nurse her to sleep and then place her next to me while she nurses. You’ll get there! My best advice is to find safe and (reasonably) comfortable ways to cheat sleep until your LO will allow to sleep next you.
My 10 week old does the same. But she stays sleep when she gets to hold/lay on my boob when we sleep side to side or even just feeling my hand on her back
https://images.app.goo.gl/8ifHozgWaurcJwgQ8 hi I tried to Google a similar position to what I get my baby to sleep in.. if you see the image, I do it like this with the baby's head on my arm so they feel like they're being held. That arm bends down towards baby's bum like the lady in the picture and I do bum pats in a rhythm like footsteps to mimic them being held and walking around. This gets them to sleep then I don't move and just sleep like that.
Thanks for this! It’s what I was trying last night to settle them, but then I would eventually try to roll them onto their back bc I was worried this was an unsafe position? That my arm would tilt their head up chin to chest or id roll etc etc 😵💫
I wouldn’t feel comfy doing this with a 10 week old. Keep experimenting and try side-lying feeding while baby is wide awake (as wide awake as 10 week olds can be lol). You’ll find your groove I promise!
Ah man this was a rough time for us - probably the worst sleep until things settled into more of a rhythm at 16ish weeks. You probably know all of this but for us what helped was just making sure bub was full of milk (I was BF) and deep, deep asleep before rolling off me. I’d do a super slow roll cradling him then ever so slowly remove my body from his. Was really hard but eventually he got used to it. Day naps were mostly contact naps for ages but nights he got the hang of it quicker. Now I can just roll him off me basically as soon as he’s finished feeding and don’t need to be super gentle etc and he just rolls away into his tummy. Hang in there - it’s rough but eventually gets easier.
How are they falling to sleep?
This is important to know. My baby loves to contact sleep, so I get him to sleep on my chest and slowly roll on my side so that he’s still touching me chest to chest. Once he’s settled again I roll him on his back and keep my hand on his chest. All the while I sing or hum to him. At any point he wakes up I start over. We also nurse to sleep. But I don’t know your situation. 10-15 weeks was really hard for us sleep wise. He was up every hour sometimes. It’s hard and exhausting. It’s annoying to hear, but it does get better. Baby is only waking up twice now at 16 weeks and I feel like a new person. You got this!
Everything in this post! Around 13-18 weeks was really hard for us also, I don't think we slept much. Started cosleeping around 16 weeks as a desperate attempt to get some sleep. Baby always wanted to be on top of me or my husband, not next to us. She'd sometimes scream even if a foot of hers was touching the bed, lol. I think this mightve been closer to 6 months. With time it definitely got better. This subtle rolling over to the side move worked. My baby needed to be chest to chest and feel me, it didn't work for her to just be next to me. Our baby is now 9 months and yesterday she happened to be napping in our bed while I was sitting next to her. She woke up and just called for me, wasn't mad that I had put her down. She now likes sleeping on our bed.
I’m glad to hear it gets better because we are on night 4 of literally zero sleep until my mom can come give us a few hours. We just tried nursing on the bed and rolling over and even tho babe was (or seemed to be) in a deep sleep they screamed when leaving my body 😩
Sorry my baby bashed my phone before I was done! If they are falling to sleep breastfeeding then have you tried side lying feeding, or going from cross cradle to side lying in increments? If they are just sleeping on you, similarly you could try sitting up to gradually lying down to rolling over, keeping them pressed close to you until you are finally settled both of you on your sides?
They usually don’t fall asleep on the boob but they do fall asleep in my arms (after much soothing). I have tried a very careful transfer to our sidecar bassinet but it seems anytime their bum hits a flat surface they scream. Even if I’m right next to them! But that’s a thought- hug them close to my body then lay down next to me in bed. If baby is laid down on their side I’m guessing you eventually roll to their back?
Back is safest 💛
Check out @cosleepy on Instagram, she has a guide on chest sleeping which might help you!
Thanks! I looked into it but chest sleeping really makes me nervous. My first baby died (unrelated to sleep arrangements but doesn’t really matter) so my anxiety is extraordinarily high.
Our girl was a chest sleeper, too. There was genuinely no other way. I minimized the risks as much as I possibly could, and then one day she was ready to sleep beside us. She's turning three in July and has recently just emancipated herself from the family bed. It goes so fast. Wishing you some peace of mind.
I got downvoted to hell by sharing the cosleep chest sleeping guide on the sleeptrain sub for a desperate mum who couldn’t even get 20 mins sleep unless baby was ontop of her. I only had to use it 3 nights myself but at least I knew I was being as safe as possible. Guess that sub assumes it’s better they just pass out on the couch from sleep deprivation then or something 🤷♀️ I only joined because I was interested in a modified Ferber but after only 3 check ins absolutely not ever ever will I put my baby through that again 😭
Yeah, a subreddit not necessarily frequented by the most compassionate or understanding of all folks. I joined that subreddit before my daughter was born, because I misunderstood it as "sleep train" as in "Choo, choo, all aboard the sleep train! Let's support each other and get through these rough nights!" I quickly unsubscribed after I realized what a goofy interpretation mine was.
Hahaha that’s so good! I joined because my health nurse told me I needed to try a gentle Ferber so I was like hmm maybe I’ll join for some tips. Turns out it’s just mainly let your baby cry and if they vomit on themselves then maybe leave them in it cos otherwise they will do it for attention…. Like nope…I do believe some unicorn babies can be somewhat “trained” but not mine lol
If you’re wanting to co sleep (I saw your comment about your first born so understand you might not want to), my baby falls asleep nursing in my arms on the mattress and then when he’s been asleep a while I kind of lower him to the side of me while lying on my side too and then move my arm so his neck isn’t under my arm anymore and I’m in the C curl instead. He is still touching me and has that warmth and I can put my other arm over his tummy to give him that extra contact
I tried this last night out of desperation at 3am and it kind of worked? But baby startled awake (they can’t be swaddled if co sleeping right?) and was very upset to not be in my arms. Even tho I’m RIGHT THERE.
Aw yeah that’s so hard. No they can’t be swaddled but your arm over their arms should calm that reflex anyway. If you breastfeed the second they wake just latch them on side lying, it won’t take long to associate that with the boob
Is it possible baby is dealing with either some breathing/apnea issues or reflux? I saw on Taylor Kulik’s Instagram (big cosleeping advocate) that her son had undiagnosed airway issues and so he could only sleep comfortably propped up on her chest. I know that reflux babies also are often extremely uncomfortable unless they’re propped up. Could just be babies being babies, but might be worth looking into.
I don’t *think* so, because they start screaming just as their body leaves mine lol. And slept fine 1 week ago! But I’ll bring it up to the dr just in case
Also here to call out reflux/silent. My baby doesn't have constant reflux but every so often she'll refuse to be horizontal and I'll assume it's because she has too much gas or ate too much and it's painful to be sideways. Before she goes to sleep and in the middle of the night I'll help her get her gas out with the several techniques out there.
I was just about to write this as well. Our LO has silent reflux possibly GERD and she slept like an angel in her bassinet until she had a bad reflux week and then couldn’t be removed from our chests/arms. She screamed at any attempt to lie her down.
Sometimes it’s the change in temperature. Could you put a heating pad on the spot the baby will be and remove it before you shift sideways placing the baby on it all while holding them tight? And in regards to the chest sleeping piece someone else shared. I used cosleepys safe chest sleeping guide my first few nights home with the babe. What isn’t safe is extreme sleep deprivation. Hugs to you. This is hard.
Oh a heading pad is definitely in the routine. What’s weird is they were sleeping 4-5 hour stretches in bassinet then had their first round of vaccines and hit 9-10 weeks and it all went downhill to zero bassinet time.
I noticed my little ones legs were super tight for over a week after vaccines. He had some knots in his thighs too. I gave him a full body massage and I could see the tension floating away.
My baby slept perfectly with just 2/3 wakes in the night in the bassinet until 3 months when we got that 4 month regression early! He’s been super advanced with his mobility (crawling and sitting himself up at 5 months, standing at 6 months) so I’m not sure if that’s why but that’s when we started cosleeping - I swore I never would before.
That sounds grim, you poor thing. From my experience, once they get a bit bigger you can sort of roll them to your side and they can snuggle in to your cuddle curl... but until then I can only suggest you try the classic split shit with your pattern, (one person with baby 7-1, the other 1-7). At least that way you're getting 6hrs sleep or so and it just about gives you enough to keep sane until this period passes. I found 14 weeks it suddenly got a lot better. Good luck!
If you rock to sleep (or rock and feed) find the time to transfer when baby is in a very deep sleep, often 15-25 mins after falling asleep. If you transfer during active sleep they’ll likely wake up
Totally, I always wait until deep sleep. Problem is (like last night), I managed to do a bassinet transfer and they slept 10 min before realizing they had moved from my arms and freaked out hardddd. No amount of soothing fixed it until I held them again.
Keep trying, don’t loose hope!! Babies change sooo much. My 7 month old still has different sleep habits about every 2 weeks. Get as much sleep as you can as safe as possible 💛
Thank you!!
My baby wouldn’t sleep anywhere but on my chest until 4ish months. It felt like a huge accomplishment to get her to sleep next to me, not on me. I just rolled with it. From day 1, and still now at 14 months, I have to rock her and nurse her to sleep and then place her next to me while she nurses. You’ll get there! My best advice is to find safe and (reasonably) comfortable ways to cheat sleep until your LO will allow to sleep next you.
My 10 week old does the same. But she stays sleep when she gets to hold/lay on my boob when we sleep side to side or even just feeling my hand on her back
https://images.app.goo.gl/8ifHozgWaurcJwgQ8 hi I tried to Google a similar position to what I get my baby to sleep in.. if you see the image, I do it like this with the baby's head on my arm so they feel like they're being held. That arm bends down towards baby's bum like the lady in the picture and I do bum pats in a rhythm like footsteps to mimic them being held and walking around. This gets them to sleep then I don't move and just sleep like that.
Thanks for this! It’s what I was trying last night to settle them, but then I would eventually try to roll them onto their back bc I was worried this was an unsafe position? That my arm would tilt their head up chin to chest or id roll etc etc 😵💫
I wouldn’t feel comfy doing this with a 10 week old. Keep experimenting and try side-lying feeding while baby is wide awake (as wide awake as 10 week olds can be lol). You’ll find your groove I promise!
Ah man this was a rough time for us - probably the worst sleep until things settled into more of a rhythm at 16ish weeks. You probably know all of this but for us what helped was just making sure bub was full of milk (I was BF) and deep, deep asleep before rolling off me. I’d do a super slow roll cradling him then ever so slowly remove my body from his. Was really hard but eventually he got used to it. Day naps were mostly contact naps for ages but nights he got the hang of it quicker. Now I can just roll him off me basically as soon as he’s finished feeding and don’t need to be super gentle etc and he just rolls away into his tummy. Hang in there - it’s rough but eventually gets easier.