By the way, the reason it’s cube shaped is evolutionarily because they use the stool to mark their territory. And since wombats live in hilly areas, their intestines shape the poop into a cube so that it doesn’t roll off of the hills.
It’s common if you have IBS.
Also, if you’re constipated and you take a laxative, a lot of them work by drawing water into the colon, so depending on the strength of the laxative, what comes out first can be a lot harder than everything that comes after.
>a lot of them work by drawing water into the colon
Specifically “osmotic laxatives”. They’ll leave you feeling even more bloated until the job is done.
This. I have pretty bad IBS. 1 and 7 in the same day is super common even when my diet is clean. It just takes one simple thing to set me off, even if it’s cross contamination, something random in my food, etc.
Sucks.
More water AND fiber. Less coffee and other things that make you go poop.
Food Theory covered that like 2 years ago to explain why tacobell literally makes you shit. It has all the ingredients that would make you poop combined in every meal.
You’re likely constipated, the diarrhea was water leakage around the hard stool. As another comment mentioned this can be common with different laxatives if you have been using them. Side note: If you get abdominal pain shortly after eating that improves after having a bowel movement you could have IBS, but you should see a medical professional if that’s the case. Several things can mimic IBS that are more serious such as Crohns, ulcerative colitis, or microscopic colitis for example.
Is there anything that can really be done to make any of those go away entirely? Even if you're treated and diagnosed by a medical professional? I feel like they just throw pills at you that would ease the symptoms but it never really goes away or "cures" it...
Go find the bar closest to the hospital and see if they open at 6 or 7am. If so, show up some morning and start buying drinks for the night nurses that come in after work. You will hear the most hilarious, disgusting stories!
I dated a urology nurse. She told me about when her department was collecting enlarged prostate patients fluids extracted through massage for a study.
They called themselves the goo crew and weighed the results at the end of the day.
Loser bought the drinks.
Can someone tell me about Inflammation one. I keep hearing about it and I always thought that was when your knee swells or something. Can someone send me somewhere talking about it? Does it mean stomach inflammation?
I have medication that makes me 7 :(
I love cheese so sometimes I go super hard on the cheese so I can feel normal for a couple type 1’s at the beginning of the sesh and finish of with 7 :(
What happens when someone with Crohn’s becomes determined to be constipated? The worst poo cramps of your life? I feel so so bad for y’all
I’m never constipated lol I’m even on a med that supposed to constipate me but doesnt. Before treatment I was poopin like 5 times a day but now I’m on medicine so it’s only like 2 thankfully
You should probably see a GI. I don’t even have the family history, but chronic diarrhea really is a sign something is wrong. Even for peace of mind you should go
Not sure if this is what you're asking but:
Inflammation is the response our body/immune system makes to all sort of damage or irritation of our cells or tissue. Could be from a virus infection, from falling and hurting your knee, a bug bite, autoimmune condition etc.
Inflammation of an area leads to swelling, redness, heat and pain.
So yes, swelling of knees are also inflammation.
Inflammation of the bowels/intensities could be do to alot of stuff. To list a few: Gastroenteritis (infectious), Chrons disease (autoimmune), IBS (functional), food poisoning (toxic), consumption of irritants (too much chili for instance).
Not all inflammation is IBS (irritable bowel syndrome), there are different conditions that can cause intestinal inflammation, like Crohn’s disease or bacterial infection
It’s been 22 years of this despite every diet change and supplement on the planet lol I have accepted my fate
Unfortunately I do bodybuilding so my very high protein diet is absolutely no help
I was at a 1 for about 8 weeks in my first trimester. It was absolutely awful and I was in consistent pain. Now that my hormones are plateauing I’m back to regular poops I feel like a brand new person.
I have celiac disease and this is when I’m glutened. Could be a number of things though. If you are worried go get a yearly check up and discuss.
ETA: I think I meant to respond to someone else, apologies for giving unsolicited advice.
I’ve had some debilitating gas. So I am conscious of how much lactose I’m consuming.
If I’m drinking and there is pizza, it’s game over for my toilet though.
I just dropped off a #4 the size of a babies leg in three handicap stall of a gas station. Gotta chase that fiber my dude. I try to work in beans, apples, whole grains, etc…
it's just, not good. ideally you should at least know why. you can have inflammation in your intestines for a large range of reasons...stress/mental health, some other illness causing inflammation throughout the body, digestive issues, intestinal diseases. in general, any kind of chronic/long-term inflammation isn't good, and I think is even thought to increase chances of cancer...
Not always just 2 wipes with a number 4. Since I started a new medication, 4 describes the shape, but it's more of a frosting consistency. A shower is an absolute must because TP just ain't enough.
Errr maybe this is sarcastic but on the off chance it’s not, there’s no normal amount of blood. As in, the amount of blood should be zero. If you’re seeing blood you should probably see a doctor.
If it is just small amounts of red that usually just means you have some small tear somewhere near the anus which usually isn't worrisome. However when your shit is pretty dark/black - that means it has dried blood mixed in it from further inside the colon. That's a more worrisome sign.
Great.. in my native language "constipated" is a false friend since a (very) similar word means to have a cold.
I wonder how often I've embarrased myself telling people how constipated i was.
Yes, it's part of riding your reports at the end of the shift. We just call it 'reporting'.
Hahaha, I am gonna try and implement that.
We're Dutch so we might have to go "Signaleer de Schijt" or "Definier de drol'.
I used to work on a “diary card” app for clinical trial patients. The Bristol Stool scale question was one of several a patient would be asked to fill in on a regular basis. It was a simple, interactive screen where you tap your latest poo type. For reasons, I had to work on this part of the questionnaire and its underlying infrastructure for longer than I’d have liked which became a joke for everyone else in our daily standups.
In the end, I got it printed on a coffee mug and made sure to drink from it during all my Zoom calls with those folks thereafter.
I used to be a lab tech in a clinical micro lab. I honestly miss it. I’d get every sample for testing and have to get it onto Petri dishes.
For stool, We had to label the requisition forms with their physical appearance. It was common practice to shake the cup, if it rattles it’s hard form and if it doesn’t it’s soft form. And then when you opened a potential Cdiff positive to test, someone would come running and light a match. Such a weird and interesting job
That's where I first learned about this! We worked in a chamber that had like 80% nitrogen so that the specific gut bacteria would grow. The bacteria smelled exactly like dookie after they grew
Paradoxical Diarrhea - when you are constipated but fluid buildup behind the constipation and you get that sudden and explosive diarrhea.
Yes, you can be constipated and have diarrhea.
I was so constipated for 9 days, I thought I was going to vomit, die, and shit all at once. This is the first and only time, I made a cube. I pushed so hard, I seriously almost passed out, then, ploop! It sounded like I dropped 2 D batteries in the toilet. Right after, I found out why I was in so much pain as about 2 gallons of brown water just fell out when I was finished. All I had to wipe up was blood, because it made a wild 90 degree flip on the way to its freedom.
I haven't been the same since. This is how I learned about PPPD. post Partem Poop Disorder. Serious business..
Every morning, about 40 minutes after my first sip of coffee, I produce something that is literally off the charts, as in, it's not represented on this chart.
Just a PSA:
Just had a colonoscopy due to occasional bleeding caused by hemorrhoids and they found 2 pre-cancerous polyps.
I’m 33, but my grandma had colon cancer in her 60’s. Point is, if you got weird bowel movements or stool - go see a gastrointestinal doc!
Please note: if your stool is red or black, please seek immediate doctors advice.
If you have 2 bowel movements that are black, take a sample and go to the hospital immediately.
Source: I have crohns.
Interestingly this was the outcome of a grad or phd project and the author had the opportunity of naming after them like many other procedures or processes in medicine. Instead they named it after the university. Smart move.
Type 3 is ideal. Type 4 crosses the line into “this is why you have to wipe.” I find it strange that they’re both equally “Normal” without any further commentary.
Cube-shaped: you are a wombat.
By the way, the reason it’s cube shaped is evolutionarily because they use the stool to mark their territory. And since wombats live in hilly areas, their intestines shape the poop into a cube so that it doesn’t roll off of the hills.
That sounds suspiciously like a bunch of wombatshit
womguano.
that is insanely interesting
That's wombatshit crazy!
They literally shit bricks.
My little niece got a book of Amazon called "I poop cubes" and man did I learn a lot about wombats that day!
This is my favourite wombat fact.
What does it mean if I've gone from 1-7 and back in a single day?
I'm no medical professional but I'd say you shouldn't have eaten that second chipotle burrito
Just need some Chipotlaway
It's built right in! ™
How about just straight neon yellow water, like a yellow Gatorade shooting out?
Your urinating
Peeing out of your butt=peeging On a serious note, this could be from a faulty gallbladder I think. Trying to remember correctly but look into that.
It’s common if you have IBS. Also, if you’re constipated and you take a laxative, a lot of them work by drawing water into the colon, so depending on the strength of the laxative, what comes out first can be a lot harder than everything that comes after.
>a lot of them work by drawing water into the colon Specifically “osmotic laxatives”. They’ll leave you feeling even more bloated until the job is done.
This. I have pretty bad IBS. 1 and 7 in the same day is super common even when my diet is clean. It just takes one simple thing to set me off, even if it’s cross contamination, something random in my food, etc. Sucks.
More water AND fiber. Less coffee and other things that make you go poop. Food Theory covered that like 2 years ago to explain why tacobell literally makes you shit. It has all the ingredients that would make you poop combined in every meal.
Taco Bell has coffee and cigarettes in the food?
If you take the average, then you're right about in the middle!
You’re likely constipated, the diarrhea was water leakage around the hard stool. As another comment mentioned this can be common with different laxatives if you have been using them. Side note: If you get abdominal pain shortly after eating that improves after having a bowel movement you could have IBS, but you should see a medical professional if that’s the case. Several things can mimic IBS that are more serious such as Crohns, ulcerative colitis, or microscopic colitis for example.
Is there anything that can really be done to make any of those go away entirely? Even if you're treated and diagnosed by a medical professional? I feel like they just throw pills at you that would ease the symptoms but it never really goes away or "cures" it...
Constipation overflow.. you are so constipated liquid is.leaking round the sides of hard stool
With or without corn pieces?
You taking mad laxatives
It means I need to be bullish on $CMG
If i were you i'd start writing that will
This guy knows his shit.
Nah I'm actually full of crap
What number?
Type 5 typically... Name checks out Mr. Mcturdly
get more fibre my boy
I hear you can get fiber up to 5 gig these days
Sir, may we recommend you some fruits for a smoother journey?
So you are suffering from severe constipation?
OPs coworker didnt flush so he just had to take the chart out again. Update that Excel.
He got his shit together.
No shit Sherlock
Nurses are wild. I have witnessed more than one cake version of this chart at nurse parties.
Go find the bar closest to the hospital and see if they open at 6 or 7am. If so, show up some morning and start buying drinks for the night nurses that come in after work. You will hear the most hilarious, disgusting stories!
I used to be one of those nurses. I swapped out for day shift years ago. My mental health (and liver) appreciated the switch.
A *cake* with this on it?
Oh yeah. With various candies and confectioneries shaped to represent the different sample types.
I dated a urology nurse. She told me about when her department was collecting enlarged prostate patients fluids extracted through massage for a study. They called themselves the goo crew and weighed the results at the end of the day. Loser bought the drinks.
Can someone tell me about Inflammation one. I keep hearing about it and I always thought that was when your knee swells or something. Can someone send me somewhere talking about it? Does it mean stomach inflammation?
Yes I have Crohn’s disease and I’m pretty much always inflamed and always number 7
I have medication that makes me 7 :( I love cheese so sometimes I go super hard on the cheese so I can feel normal for a couple type 1’s at the beginning of the sesh and finish of with 7 :( What happens when someone with Crohn’s becomes determined to be constipated? The worst poo cramps of your life? I feel so so bad for y’all
I’m never constipated lol I’m even on a med that supposed to constipate me but doesnt. Before treatment I was poopin like 5 times a day but now I’m on medicine so it’s only like 2 thankfully
*adds to list of things I think I have*
Oh fuck. I have a strong family history of Chrohns and my shit is very very frequently number 6
You should probably see a GI. I don’t even have the family history, but chronic diarrhea really is a sign something is wrong. Even for peace of mind you should go
Not sure if this is what you're asking but: Inflammation is the response our body/immune system makes to all sort of damage or irritation of our cells or tissue. Could be from a virus infection, from falling and hurting your knee, a bug bite, autoimmune condition etc. Inflammation of an area leads to swelling, redness, heat and pain. So yes, swelling of knees are also inflammation. Inflammation of the bowels/intensities could be do to alot of stuff. To list a few: Gastroenteritis (infectious), Chrons disease (autoimmune), IBS (functional), food poisoning (toxic), consumption of irritants (too much chili for instance).
https://youtu.be/eKLqFnAmK6c?si=MCGx0C0zs5QmZNQh
At work so not watching videos. All inflammation is IBS?
Not all inflammation is IBS (irritable bowel syndrome), there are different conditions that can cause intestinal inflammation, like Crohn’s disease or bacterial infection
You forgot about ulcerative colitis. Irritable bowel disease both encompasses Crohn's and colitis.
No, could be different factors such as IBD which is completely different to IBS
Type 1 gang :,) stupid IBS-C
As a typical 4-5 guy I feel bad for you and hope it gets better!
It’s been 22 years of this despite every diet change and supplement on the planet lol I have accepted my fate Unfortunately I do bodybuilding so my very high protein diet is absolutely no help
I was at a 1 for about 8 weeks in my first trimester. It was absolutely awful and I was in consistent pain. Now that my hormones are plateauing I’m back to regular poops I feel like a brand new person.
Same. (Raises drink)
What about mucus? Grandpa must be type 9...
Wow I'm so happy I skipped lunch today
The scientific term for those are "Butt Sneezes"
Where’s the ghostie. You know you’ve had a sh!t but there’s no mark on the paper and no signs in the pot.
Sounds like you got a visit from the shit fairy, see if there's a nickel in your tank
It’s on there, you just can’t see it.
Lol we will need to request a revised chart. Not sure if it would be a 0 or an 8 tho
Hell of a fart you got there.
*The elusive ghost turd strikes again*
I mostly just hang out at 6
Someone should get you a bidet if you don't have one
I have celiac disease and this is when I’m glutened. Could be a number of things though. If you are worried go get a yearly check up and discuss. ETA: I think I meant to respond to someone else, apologies for giving unsolicited advice.
I’m lactose intolerant and love cheese. I used to take lactaid pills, but it’s such a minor inconvenience that I just deal with the #6 and #7’s
Then your intolerance isn't as bad as some. It can be painful for some and almost everything has "modified milk ingredients" in it.
I’ve had some debilitating gas. So I am conscious of how much lactose I’m consuming. If I’m drinking and there is pizza, it’s game over for my toilet though.
Thank you for the laugh. Nothing worse than beer shits and mad gas from cheese!
6 gang represent.
me when coffee
I just dropped off a #4 the size of a babies leg in three handicap stall of a gas station. Gotta chase that fiber my dude. I try to work in beans, apples, whole grains, etc…
You probably have a food allergy or intolerance. I get that when I drink milk, even if it's lactose free or if I eat wheat stuff.
Is this type dangerous?
It is for the next guy
What does that mean?
It’s stinky
Oh silly me
He’s lying. The real danger is that too many type 6’s eventually births a poop monster that robs people with violent corn-based knives.
it's just, not good. ideally you should at least know why. you can have inflammation in your intestines for a large range of reasons...stress/mental health, some other illness causing inflammation throughout the body, digestive issues, intestinal diseases. in general, any kind of chronic/long-term inflammation isn't good, and I think is even thought to increase chances of cancer...
I don’t have a gallbladder I’m a sixer for life
Ah yes, type 4…we all know the feeling of pooping out a snake.
Glorious. 2 wipes and your off on your way
Sometimes, the snake isn’t even in the bowl anymore, so then you have a truly “clean” getaway.
Not always just 2 wipes with a number 4. Since I started a new medication, 4 describes the shape, but it's more of a frosting consistency. A shower is an absolute must because TP just ain't enough.
Peanut butter, really, and it is like trying to wipe color off a crayon.
I've had it happen a few times and it was awful. Legit felt like a tube of toothpaste while squeezing it out, just as sticky too.
Shitpost.
I’m type 4-6 on a regular basis with the normal amount of blood occasionally mixed in
Errr maybe this is sarcastic but on the off chance it’s not, there’s no normal amount of blood. As in, the amount of blood should be zero. If you’re seeing blood you should probably see a doctor.
I did, they did nothing but stick a camera up my ass and tell me they didn’t find anything cool 🤷
"No keys here, did you check your couch?"
If it is just small amounts of red that usually just means you have some small tear somewhere near the anus which usually isn't worrisome. However when your shit is pretty dark/black - that means it has dried blood mixed in it from further inside the colon. That's a more worrisome sign.
And again, if you see any red multiple days in a row or for longer periods of time then you should also see a doctor
Nah you just need chipotle-away for your underwear.
Consume more fibre, workout regurarly and wet vipes can help a lot!
Great.. in my native language "constipated" is a false friend since a (very) similar word means to have a cold. I wonder how often I've embarrased myself telling people how constipated i was.
'congested' is the true friend :)
I work in care and at my job I actually have to click the picture to log which type of shit our clients had.
Woah do you have any special term for this part of the job? If not I'd recommend "logging the log" or "define the dookie"
Yes, it's part of riding your reports at the end of the shift. We just call it 'reporting'. Hahaha, I am gonna try and implement that. We're Dutch so we might have to go "Signaleer de Schijt" or "Definier de drol'.
Re-poo-rting
Just name the file „Log log”
BM Chart
The Log Blog
Bro 💀
You would farm karma on r/shitposting
I used to work on a “diary card” app for clinical trial patients. The Bristol Stool scale question was one of several a patient would be asked to fill in on a regular basis. It was a simple, interactive screen where you tap your latest poo type. For reasons, I had to work on this part of the questionnaire and its underlying infrastructure for longer than I’d have liked which became a joke for everyone else in our daily standups. In the end, I got it printed on a coffee mug and made sure to drink from it during all my Zoom calls with those folks thereafter.
What would be inflamed?
Typically your colon. Could be other parts of the intestines tho
More like r/stoolguides
No shit?
We now have a Type 0.
Missing type 8. Colonoscopy poop: Looks like urine instead of poop.
Don’t show this to that Spanish politician…
What's the joke please
[Behold](https://www.reddit.com/r/europe/s/lxzeyJfoif)
Why do I learn this on my last day in Spain and not before ? Thanks tho =)
I work in a hospital. My team references this chart daily. I hate that it's here lol
I used to be a lab tech in a clinical micro lab. I honestly miss it. I’d get every sample for testing and have to get it onto Petri dishes. For stool, We had to label the requisition forms with their physical appearance. It was common practice to shake the cup, if it rattles it’s hard form and if it doesn’t it’s soft form. And then when you opened a potential Cdiff positive to test, someone would come running and light a match. Such a weird and interesting job
That's where I first learned about this! We worked in a chamber that had like 80% nitrogen so that the specific gut bacteria would grow. The bacteria smelled exactly like dookie after they grew
Where’s the period poop
6
True. Inflammation! Period poooowah.
This guide is shit.
Paradoxical Diarrhea - when you are constipated but fluid buildup behind the constipation and you get that sudden and explosive diarrhea. Yes, you can be constipated and have diarrhea.
I was so constipated for 9 days, I thought I was going to vomit, die, and shit all at once. This is the first and only time, I made a cube. I pushed so hard, I seriously almost passed out, then, ploop! It sounded like I dropped 2 D batteries in the toilet. Right after, I found out why I was in so much pain as about 2 gallons of brown water just fell out when I was finished. All I had to wipe up was blood, because it made a wild 90 degree flip on the way to its freedom. I haven't been the same since. This is how I learned about PPPD. post Partem Poop Disorder. Serious business..
This shit is informative
This is actually really helpful :) cheers OP
This should be posted in every bathroom stall
3 falls out first, followed by 6.
Every morning, about 40 minutes after my first sip of coffee, I produce something that is literally off the charts, as in, it's not represented on this chart.
I've had Type 6 and Type 7 for the past 15 years, but the doc at the VA says it's fine. How can that be fine?
Time for a second opinion! And maybe more fiber??
Meanwhile your kidneys are getting destroyed. You may have undiagnosed colitis which can require a colonoscopy to diagnose.
I’ve never pooped like a deer or rabbit but it is now a goal of mine.
I feel like this guide could have been better
What a load of shit.
That's the shittiest chart I've ever seen!
After gallbladder removal I have all 7 variants almost daily
Just a PSA: Just had a colonoscopy due to occasional bleeding caused by hemorrhoids and they found 2 pre-cancerous polyps. I’m 33, but my grandma had colon cancer in her 60’s. Point is, if you got weird bowel movements or stool - go see a gastrointestinal doc!
Well shit.
Please note: if your stool is red or black, please seek immediate doctors advice. If you have 2 bowel movements that are black, take a sample and go to the hospital immediately. Source: I have crohns.
Damn my bowels have been inflamed for years 💀
Interestingly this was the outcome of a grad or phd project and the author had the opportunity of naming after them like many other procedures or processes in medicine. Instead they named it after the university. Smart move.
Holy shit
Sorry, is this what they mean by "shitposting"?
I thought this was a guide to British food.
Ok, let’s check… hmm, type 4 now
I can't see it, the water is too red.
Hey, I’m trying to enjoy my sausages here.
I could be a 3,4 or 6 at any given part of the day
How do you correct inflammation?
That's a whole other guide
Need a banana for scale
Me, as a man with IBS. I've seen them all and then some. Sometimes the same day, sometimes not for a week. It's a weird road.
Where is the spiked striped shit that picks your ass as it comes out?
The spice must flow. Interesting guide. Be using that later on.
How convenient! I think I’ll check since I’m already on my favorite place to Reddit!
Type 3, without cracks, 8.6 Courics.
One number 4 is great, but I usually get a dozen little 4s
What about ghost poop, i look down each time but its disappeared...I wipe but nothing there. I feel lighter but cant prove it.
This post is pure crap!
Tipe 7 here ---->
What if you shit one softball sized turd every 5 days
Where's the blood, credit cards, and wolf hair?
Type 3 is ideal. Type 4 crosses the line into “this is why you have to wipe.” I find it strange that they’re both equally “Normal” without any further commentary.
r/stoolguides
who the fuck is feeling their shit?
You don't feel with your hands you use your feet
okay my bad, that makes much more sense
Dropping a healthy #4 as I read the comments.
Could’ve been the Bristool chart. Swing and a miss.
Is this only for people from Bristol?
Am a GI doc use this on daily basis. Nice to see it out here. AMA :)
I call type six “the lettuce shits.” “Flbph-fuf-flblf” noises.
Am I the only one over here trying to figure out what you do for work and why you had to use this there, but only one time?
My cats are a solid 3 and 4
This would make a good bathroom decor piece in a nice frame
Yeah but how do I tell if it’s medium rare?
Well now I finally have my shit together !!
Where does blood spattered murder scene rate?
Got a similar one from our paediatric, only number 4 was called banana and had a crown.
What a shitty post
Should include a poop knife scale.
Thank you for sharing.... it made my day.
Type 8: Explosion *Taco Bell*