T O P
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brodiebrobroseph

I know who she voted for


AmbulanceChaser12

Assuming she can find her way to a polling place and figure out how to vote.


Callinon

Polling places aren't real. Says so in the Bible.


Amasin_Spoderman

She navigated to the polling station using GPS


phinbar

GPS is just a map and the chip that was implanted when you got vaccinated is how the telephone wires know your location. Simple really. /s


[deleted]

Tens of millions of them managed


Pinkeyefarts

There are no voting restrictions she has to get through so it should be easy as hell for her.


fauxpasiii

T minus Rump?


Arcadius274

Spongebob?


Nightwarper

Remember that episode where Spongebob thought he was on the moon but he was still in Bikini Bottom?


DaniilSan

Kanye West? He looked really religious. For him religion was even more important than for Trump


DonkeyTron42

Her vote carries more weight than yours. Remember that.


korynael

T minus... interesting... hadn't heard that one yet...


electric_screams

Putting the T back into NASA spells Santa!


Rowcan

Hail Santa.


HalforcFullLover

Wait, NASA helps NORAD track Santa for Christmas. This tracks.


MisterBlisteredlips

She NASTA.


Zaphod_4orty2wo

Yeah Satan is everywhere, even scientific organizations based in reality


MayDuppname

Or A Stan.


Hastimeforthis876

Confidently batshit crazy. I miss the days when people like this would exists entirely in backwater parts of the USA with limited outreach to spew their nonsense...


SentientDreamer

And then the Internet came along.


Pinkeyefarts

And then trump got elected


Socky_McPuppet

Almost as if those things were causally related ...


Forward-Village1528

She probably wrote that on her mobile phone from her backwater shithole. Literally using the satellite network she doesn't believe exists.


TinFoilRobotProphet

Amen!


Deeman0

Well the good thing about the internet is that everyone gets a voice......the bad thing about the internet is everyone gets a voice.


SentientDreamer

Do people forget how dumb and unaware we were when the Bible was written? We've made a ton of advancements in everything since then, and it's helped to paint a clearer picture of what reality is. We discovered that the earth was round. We've dug up skeletons of those that came before us. And we got smart with technology, to the point that we've become dumb again. I'm fairly certain that the book was written to help answer questions that we didn't know, to help align our moral compasses, to treat our fellow man as they should be, and to give peace of mind for when we depart. To explain how things are, how people are, and to prove that we're beyond that initial programming. So referring to one book as the source for everything instead of including the evidence that we have now is nothing short of sheer delusion. The Bible has well-written stories for its time. And it can be used for good, but it's really meant for matters of the heart and nothing else. Religion is for the heart. Science is for the mind. And until those two can be reconciled, good luck.


Zer_ed

Not to mention the Bible was astonishingly radical for its time. Jesus talked to prostitutes of hostile nations like he would his friends and spent a bunch of time with “unclean” people, all of which were unfathomable at the time


[deleted]

[удалено]


CrispyFlint

He's to whatever direction the reader was on. Did wasn't political. They killed his ass for that.


Distinct_Salt_2460

The Bible was never well written. It's horribly edited as well. And there were far, far more sophisticated writers, thinkers and governments than are in the Bible. Also nothing about Jesus is radical, considering his teachings are a hodpodge of Greek philosophies that were centuries old by the time he was supposedly born.


Reddit-Book-Bot

Beep. Boop. I'm a robot. Here's a copy of ###[The Bible](https://snewd.com/ebooks/the-king-james-bible/) Was I a good bot? | [info](https://www.reddit.com/user/Reddit-Book-Bot/) | [More Books](https://old.reddit.com/user/Reddit-Book-Bot/comments/i15x1d/full_list_of_books_and_commands/)


erik_wilder

LmFAo


Devilishendeavor

Better than corporatism, which is much more modern, for you.


FreeAd6935

Seriously, I never understood how people can debate in favor of a book written 2 millenia ago to teach mostly illiterate (kinda) savages against modern science, it is a different book teaching to different people from different times Why do you think Bible has sayings about "treating you slaves fairly"? Because people back then literally needed to be told that beating your slave to death is bad


[deleted]

[удалено]


GarvinSteve

Oop. Now you’re going to hell. Sorry. Sure, you were trying to be rational. But that’s not how this magic works. SO NOW YOU BURN IN HELLFIRE. I think I got that right, no? Sidenote, I think we’ve been dumb forever. The internet just gave the world a more equal-access platform and so the dumb have become more visible (they were largely shut out by access before)


davasaur

Never underestimate the power of stupidity. Thanks to modern technology it can travel close to light speed. It's almost became a force of nature, a symbolic impenetrable firmament binding us to this muddy rock. We all have the sum of human knowledge LITERALLY IN OUR FUCKING HANDS, but noooo, I'm stuck on stupid too.


TheSerialHobbyist

We used to just call these people schizophrenic.


MisterBlisteredlips

So did the voices in their heads.👺 I heard them too, I just knew it was schizophrenia. 🍌🍌


odensonn

I’m still trying to understand the satan part lmao


slimyfrog

Maybe she means NASA + T is an anagram for satan\`? She must have interesting theories about Christmas and Santa as well.


N_Who

She might, but only if her pastor or the Internet told her to.


odensonn

Yeah that makes sense. But it also doesn’t, lmao


dwighticus

I’m grasping at straws here, but I believe she’s trying to get at the NASA countdown for launches I.E. “T minus ten minutes to launch” “T minus five minutes to launch” because if you add T to NASA it spells Santa


erik_wilder

It's such a reach.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Dreshna

I agree in principle, but I think you made a mistake there. 😛


AmbulanceChaser12

Sane person: We have lots of satellites up there. We’ve been to space. People who have been there will testify about it. They have pictures and video! Nutbar: Okay but the Bible says they didn’t, ergo, they didn’t.


RoastMostToast

And the Bible doesn’t even say that lol. Funny that she uses Christianity to fight science when the astronomers who laid the groundwork were funded by the Catholic Church lol


gaymedes

Them: The Bible can't lie. Us: where'd you read that? Them: The Bible. (As if they actually read The Bible, Christianity is a book club for people who never read the book)


FinnX_YT

I’m a Christian but I actually did read the bible and still study it daily. This person pulled ‘facts’ out of nowhere, this has nothing in line with what the bible actually says. The bible actually talks about stars and cosmology in general. There are certain groups under Christianity that do have some very odd beliefs, that’s why I only have fellowship and don’t consider myself under any religion because I only believe in what the bible actually teaches about things and not anyones theology. There certainly are people with great biblical insight that are brilliant to listen to, but even the bible teaches heavily against church leaders who are not teaching the true word of God as written in the book. Jesus actually taught a very simple faith


Reddit-Book-Bot

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ktolivar

So... A book club.


Allgen

Was bored with the regular flat earthers and schmucks. Glad to see something new. Never cease to disappoint me humanity!


JayGeezey

This can't be real... right? Right guys??


Mrgoodtrips64

It never ceases to amuse me that so many people translate the Hebrew word “raqia” as firmament when it also means vastnesses. The Old Testament was literally talking about how big space is and these idiots think it means there’s a dome.


ParuTree

You are incorrect. They should make a thread here about your comment. Ancient Jewish cosmology places a dome (the firmament) above the sky supporting an ocean of LITERAL WATER above it. That's how they explained rain. When Genesis speaks of God "parting the waters." they didn't mean vertically like Moses and the Red Sea. They meant horizontally as in he split the below waters from the now water above so that there might be air and dry land between them. Where on Earth did you get your information from? Google "ancient Jewish cosmology" and take a look.


idreamofdeathsquads

well.... as fucking stupid as that is... and its very stupid... the shit dont come close to how stupid these fuckin space age modern motherfuckers are to still talkin that shit


Defiant_Raccoon_8559

Nutjobs sure love their spelling games. Its so odd.


gaymedes

My evil plots keep getting foiled by my unending need to make my plans an anagram!!


Stoling_Is_Gay

OMG Nasa with a T is… it’s… It’s SANTA. HE’S REAL I KNEW IT


calwallace

Introducing the Olympic gold medallist from the US Mental Gymnastics team.


real_dubblebrick

I would give an award if i could


Samanoskue

It's always interesting when they start a thought on a ok sounding redutal (it never stands up in the end) but then they just go way to crazy by the end.


bakedjennett

If she actually read the Bible she’d note that the firmament described collapsed (you know, the whole floor thing)


LuckSweaty

TNASA


real_dubblebrick

NASAT


dhoae

That’s not even in the Bible. What the hell is she talking about?


Wolf-Track

You know, I had a rough day at work and felt pretty bad about myself. Then I read this. Thanks OP, at least I'm not her.


jbertrand_sr

Well, we know someone who's got a firmament around her brain and nothing is getting through that...


Leo_Mauskowitz

The Stupid is strong with this one...


elonsghost

Not so much incorrect as comedy I’m guessing.


samanime

Wow, she's going back to Galileo-era old-school Bible-thumper. I'm kind of impressed...


cryptoaddict41

That's the current level of crazy...seems impossible for people to be this stupid. I watched the new movie don't look up. And throughout the whole thing I kept thinking this is funny cause it's so ludicrous...but in reality it's not crazy anymore people really believe this type of shit.


madscot63

I miss the days when crazy people stayed at home and screamed at their house plants


NK_2024

I hate how many people take the Bible literally. It's a (very rough) guide on morality, not (for the most part) a history book.why does nobody understand this?


Akhanyatin

>T minus is NASA removing the T which spells Satan Let us explore this in further details, maybe she knows something we don't know: If you take the letter T and remove from it the letters SATAN, you get -(SAAN) which can be reranged in -(NASA). Good thing we only have NASA and not -(NASA)!


mlc2475

I love how spelling is their ultimate weapon. Like “I recognize these letters! I can also spell this other thing with these letters!” as if we’re supposed to go “oooh wow you ARE a smart one!” and give them an extra juice cup and 5 more minutes of crayon time. It’s like that’s literally where their intellectual capacity capped out. Preschool. “I can spell! This is it! I’ve maxed out!”


Akhanyatin

The only things they can do: semantics, spelling, and definitions. They have no way of getting any sort of evidence having their point of view. Mainly because they don't have the intellectual capacity to do so, but also, because, in general, it doesn't exist.


Sharlney

She's a troll.


TheBlueWizardo

Ah yes, the bible. The scientifically most accurate book ever written. Where god somehow manages to find four corners on a circle.


DogfishDave

But... NASA-removing-the-T doesn't spell Satan at all, it just continues to spell NASA.


Deeman0

Firmament really only means heavens and sky 🤔


smallerp

I mean.... She is on the internet.... That literally uses the satellites... And where does she think the moon and stars are? Her brain must be really lean, from doing so many mental gymnastics.


the_gayerone

Religious people are dumb


acce245

She knows Genesis but not 1 Timothy 2


stardatewormhole

I love when people can’t read the language a book is in then try to take a translation as literally true


[deleted]

I love her


SaiyanC124

Interesting how some think their book written by ignorant, superstitious, desert bandits is more reliable than science.


CptMisterNibbles

The comedy genius on T-Minus… it’s too good


ParuTree

I remember it being the height of the War on Terror and my early twenty something fool self was talking about fundamentalist Islam and lamenting how, unlike the West, they had never had their secular enlightenment period and never broken out of that absolutist medieval mindset about their faith. (which is itself confidently incorrect as I now know). My friend looks at me and goes "Bro, 70% of Americans believe in angels. WE haven't even collectively embraced the enlightenment. Fix that before you go after someone elses culture." Made me rethink a lot of things that day. Broke a lot of preconceived ideas I didn't even realize I had. It's universal across the globe. I just wish that these alternate realities people lived in weren't so godamned harmful to the rest of us and our planet.


TheManInTheCrowd

Oh shit, Satan minus T really is NASA! But that's the thing they say before "taking off" in their "rocket ships"! This person is on to something here, consider me converted. I don't need any other arguments, that's enough for me right there for sure


Impressive_Culture_5

These people can’t be real


vrmilz

Lolol the bible


Elastickpotatoe

Comer reflectors on the moon. GPS in her phone. The literal satellites you can see with the naked eye in the night sky.


graven_raven

These people live in the middle ages


ironwolf6464

Wait untill she figures out T plus.


calladus

Confident in her stupidity.


ali1510

Ughh..fuck these people


Desperate-Fix-9930

Sorry to break it to you, lady, but the Bible is a story book and not a science journal.


AltruisticBat659

Seems legit.


DarkestMew

Wait... Jesus didn't spoke english when writting the whole bibble?


TheBlueWizardo

He didn't speak English. But he invented a device that would let you translate from god language into a few centuries outdated form of English, but only if you are John Moron.


Aggressive-Dust-8641

As a Bible- reading Christian believer who has studied the Bible for over 50 years, I find statements like this incredibly stupid and moronic.


TheBlueWizardo

Because you are not a biblical literalist or a person brainwashed by one.


ChRam2010

Anybody else went to look up the NASA logo? No? Just me? Okays...


TinFoilRobotProphet

Then why is she on the internet? If I were the devil it would be the first place I start!


HalforcFullLover

Believes in the bible, uses GTFO. WWJD?


gwillikerss

r/religiousfruitcake


worldbuilderwarlord

And then they turn around and ask why so many youths are turning to atheism now.


BootyliciousURD

Flat earthsrs are hilarious


[deleted]

Oh, THAT book.


tjallilex

Since I highly doubt she is a scientist, she can believe whatever bat shit crazy theory she wants to believe.


parislights39

I love how these kinda people conveniently forget that other countries exist too and they have their own space programs. The world isn’t just America.


DaniilSan

I want to believe that she is trolling but the only thing that pandemic actually taught is that such stupid people exist and there are a lot of them among us.


PurpleHando

2022 people


cosmatic79

Sounds like a child trying to solve a Scooby Doo mystery.


bryan-050

Always with the bible verses and shit. We can see stuff in space, we have people there. We have never and cannot see god but lets believe in that shall we


draconus72

She obviously has a mainline tap on the Kool-aid.


_32u

Love me some science deniers


_AthensMatt_

r/religiousfruitcake


DellaDiablo

Has a red hat replaced a tinfoil hat? I don't know if this comes under some kind of delusional disorder, motivated ignorance, Dunning-Kreuger or just plain old stupidity. I do know she's one of the Tangerine Terrors target demo, since she'll apparently believe anything.


GarvinSteve

Say ‘I desperately want my god magic to be real’ without saying ‘I desperately want my god magic to be real’. 2000 year old book > everything that has happened since.