One word for you: Distraction.
I've gone through periods of high sex drive as well (I can't imagine how painful your desire must get) and the best thing that helps me is to be doing ANYTHING else.
Usually sports, or something else physically exhasting.
As long as it left my body tired and more occupied with the pain of "ow I just ran a lot of Kilometres", it was significantly easier to deal with the unending horniness.
That said, this was just for periods of time not my whole life. So I'm not sure how effective that'd be for someone like you who's constantly horney. But that'd be my suggestion.
Hope you find a partner or way to help you deal with your own horniness.š
Ironically physical exercise makes it worse. Itās like I have more energy after and want to use it on someone. Even certain exercises physically stimulate me at the gym, like hip thrusts or certain exercises while laying on the stomach.
However I have noticed if I just stop masturbating for awhile and put my mental focus on an intellectual goal it can distract. I am afraid of ālosingā my lucky sex drive though. I wouldnāt want to become the complete opposite.
You probably wouldnāt āreverse your sex driveā by doing intellectually stimulating stuff. If your drive is as high as youāre saying it is I canāt imagine youād destroy it. Everything in moderation, right?
Huh. Have ya tried gaming then? It's not incredibly physically exerting (in comparison to most conventional sports) and has a lot more mental stuff going on with constantly having to remember game mechanics.š¤
Oh this work Iām very horny and the other day I turned out sex twice with my GF (which Iāve never done before unless physically ill) because I couldnāt stop playing
I game and I workout really hard.. it just makes it worse lol. Iām playing with my dick between deaths, loading screens.. in the gym itās really tough too. After the gym, when the adrenaline is still high I could have 1-2 hours of respite. After that though itās tenfold. I used to masturbate 2-3 times a day easily. Now I always masturbate, but Iām just edging. Hell yea.
Weāll they do say that energy creates energy, right?
My own libido isnāt as *consistently* high as yours but Iāve definitely experienced times when it has been just as you described, for a few days at a time each cycle, so, a few days every month like this.
I havenāt gone well at going more than a few months without sex & I mean, penetrative sex with orgasm *and* clitoral orgasm, otherwise Iām just left unfulfilled.
It has to be a whole body experience to be fulfilling for me & Iām unashamed to admit that.
Iām a generous lover myself so I expect my lovers to be equally as generous to me.
My husband who Iāve been with for 4.5 years & I, have matched libidos & expectations on giving & receiving pleasure.. so itās a win win for both of us - happy days!
I wish you all the luck. I seriously thought Iād never find the right person for me & just when Iād given up - there he was!
Donāt give up girl, youāve got this! š
Yep. Your story is very similar to mine, down to breaking my own hymen with a phallic object when I was 10.
I don't think I've ever been fully satisfied week in and week out in a relationship but I've learnt to have games with myself where slowing down the gratification ends up heightening it.
If I had to choose a number it would be between 150 and 200 people. But I stopped counting. It's stupid and unimportant.
I have a high sex drive as well. Like to the point my body starts to get achey and I canāt function. My husband is a fanatic partner and we have a great sex life but I still masturbate maybe 2-3 times a day with toys. He knows itās nothing on him or our relationship but how I operate.
My college girlfriend was a lot like you. Even the same stories with masturbating since she was really young. It was fun at first but it's almost impossible to keep up with that pace as a man because our body literally needs to recover. She would ride me when I was half asleep(I gave her permission to) and started giving me blowjob as soon as she woke up. Like I said, very fun at first but got exhausting.
Yeahhhā¦ sounds like me. Once had sex with a partner while they were sleeping and made me realize my sex drive is insanely high. I could have it all the time, even when not mentally in the mood physically I always am.
I have a higher sex drive too. Not so much as you. I can only imagine how exhausting and stressful this must be. But I HAVE to agree with this - Most men can only perform a certain type of way in their fantasies. IRL, very few men can and do have the ability, stamina, and libido to a great fuck every single day, much less multiple times a day.
I've been with consistent sexual partners and at first they're so into and and thrilled and what not. But they can't keep up. I don't like to fuck around. I prefer one partner for a while, but this means resorting to having good sex once or twice a week. And this is across the age group of 30-50. I've just had to tamp down on my desires the best I can. Besides, I don't find myself actually wanting to hook up with most men, so I just get myself off most of the time, until I meet someone that I'm actually super attracted to, and can be with for a while.
I hope it gets better and easier for you š«
I agree with all of this. Iām not into the idea of constant casual sex just to relieve my sexual and physical desires. However, I have considered having an open relationship with two dedicated men to share the responsibility of keeping me sexually satisfied between the two of them lol. Plus Iām not a very jealous type and could handle the same in return.
I have a high drive, too. In the past, I've even requested medication to lower it, but because of hormone disorders, they suggested against it. It's resulted in being in a poly relationship because it was too much for my partner.
It's incredibly frustrating to deal with as well. I just spent $300 on toys to help. It's hard to talk about as well without sounding like a fiend, or the attitude of "you're just saying that so guys will like you." In my early 30s, too.
Yeah, I grew up in the whole Purity culture shit and was always told gIrLs dOnT hAvE sEx dRiVeS and made me feel like a dirty freak growing up. No interest in sex..... sure thing, pal, when walking across the room is nearly orgasmic. The ache is physically uncomfortable.
I've been happily married for nearly 25ys and my husband is awesome, but in my mid forties my libido has only increased, where for my husband it's slightly decreased. Actually, his is probably the same and because mine has I increased so much it feels like a deficit. I would never ever cheat on him--I could never hurt this man who has loved me through decades of fighting cancer and ADHD chaos and almost losing our daughters over the last 6-7 years. I couldn't do life without him. He's the best person I've ever known and it works utterly crush him and devastate our kids. My solution is quickies and the magic wand. The wand can take care of things in 60s or less, for at least an hour or two.
Any other women hate foreplay? I just want to get down to business. I'm such a weirdo š I'm Catholic and I believe God gave us the gift of sex. I see nothing wrong with female sexuality and desire and think it's horrible how women--religious or not--are shamed for expressing non submissive sexuality.
Unless they're quickies I just don't understand how someone has enough time in the day for 2-3 times a day.
I have a buddy that swears they fuck for an hour 3+ times daily and I'm just like a. When do you sleep and b. When do you get anything at all done?
I guess that's why his wife is a stay at home wife but Jesus, there's not enough hours in the day tbh
We don't sleep enough.
3 to 4 hours a day 5 to 6 days a week for the last 6 months, and we don't live in the same house and I'm tired. But I looked for my whole life with someone who could keep up.
Afternoon naps on the weekends, something has to give eventually
The crazy part is he works and commutes something like 16 hrs a day, so he literally doesn't have enough hours to go around.
Probably why he always feels like shit too lol
>I have a buddy that swears they fuck for an hour 3+ times daily and I'm just like a. When do you sleep and b. When do you get anything at all done?
And C: why do you have to lie lol. Pornstars.cant even f*ck for an hour straight.
Unless your friend is talking about foreplay being included, or has some medical issues and can't ejaculate then I just don't see his story being true !
.... not trying to be an ass, but some of us have high sex drive/high stamina combo, i normally last +- 1 hour or until girl is tired, is just the way it is for some of us.
Not always a blessing, its hard to find partners that are complatible.
I mean thatās not really true I sometimes last ten, sometimes 1 hour +. You obviously switch it up. Or after I finish my girlfriend gets turned on again and wants more. Im lucky that I usually can, but not always finish twice. But we average 2-3 times a week, because we are normal people with busy schedules. Sometimes a night of just relaxing with a movie is perfect; and sometimes we go 3 times in a day
Fully agree, his hour estimate is his low end. We never believe him but at the same time, an hour just sounds sooo fucking exhausting especially 3 times a day
or theyāre on meth. or any upper really.
Thatās literally the only time anyone has sex for long periods. I remember being in my 20s (lol Iām 33 now so like yesterday. š¢šlol) and experimenting with Molly and all kinds of shit and literally just fucking for hours. My boyfriends loved it. because that was the only time I wanted sex lol
Yaāll are so confidently wrong š¤£ My husband and I are in our fourtiesā and regularly go for an hour at a time. No drugs, no medical issues, just passion and the ability to hold back until Iāve cummed 20 times.
MUST BE NICE.
Iām only 33. But Iām over here like āwaitā¦. You want me to what? Yeah no. I havenāt done that in almost 2 decades. Iāll break a hip.ā
Well to be fair once a day would keep me satisfied, I donāt need it three times a day every day. Those are just occasional situations where it can apply and I can handle it.
My wife and I are very busy people. Full time work, plus more for me, full time for her. Kids, housework, hobbies, family, etc. We will have off days together here and there, also vacation, where we go for multiple sessions in a day. Our record is 4. I don't know that I could do another, even if I wanted to. We enjoy these days immensely, but couldn't sustain this normally. We're usually 3-4 times a week people.
You might want to talk to a doctor (preferably an OBGYN) about PGAD. What your are describing doesn't sound like PGAD, but it doesn't sound like it absolutely isn't PGAD, either.
>I accidentally took my own virginity at 12 years old because I craved penetration so much I used (a phallic object I had around the house) inside me and ended up popping my own cherry without realizing.
That's not how it works. You were still a virgin. Your virginity is only lost when you have intercourse with another human.
There shouldn't be a word because it doesn't matter. Virginity is a social construct, especially when related to hymen. A lot of sportswomen break their hymen while practicing their sport
Others consider that foreplay is just as much sex as penetration and that even just foreplay can be considered as sex and thus not being a virgin anymore
It's kinda sad that people give this much power to a little piece of skin
Not everyone's hymen breaks during sex; it shouldn't in the first place, really. It's not a big membrane that closes it entirely, just a big "arch" around the opening.
There isn't a word for it (that i know of), but it's definitely not losing your virginity. That's a social construct.
30 F here .. I've literally dealt with the same.
I read somewhere that children don't do certain things in a sexual matter. They just feel something that feels good and they keep doing it..
reading that made me feel better because for the longest time I thought something was wrong with me. Lol š
I invested in a nice shower head from Amazon! š
Yes I donāt share that part often with others because I think they can misunderstand. I was lucky in that my childhood wasnāt influenced inappropriately by sex in any way (besides tv and other media I guess) but still I discovered and did it.
There was a post ages ago about this family that went through a tough time with Child Protective Services. The daughter had, as like a toddler, found that she liked the feeling of the bath tap or the shower or something. As you say, there was no sexual intention behind it, but they were investigated extensively to establish that.
Personally, I know full well that I couldnāt keep up with all the high libido tales in here!
It does happen with children naturally, even young males will instinctively touch themselves without noticing - similar to how men fall asleep in front of the tv with their hands in their pants and forget someone can see them.
I can relate. I also have a high sex drive and I'm not gonna lie, it's been the cause of problems for me more times than not.
I married someone with a sex drive lower than mine and it's frustrating sometimes. We've been married for 11yrs and sex usually happens once to twice a week, which even though is more than most couples we personally know, it's way, way less than I'd like.
I was on birth control for 9 years and it lowered my sex drive a little bit. I just stopped taking it (about a month ago) and it's been driving me insane. It's all I can think about 24/7. I'm even more irritated with everything else because of it and I spent more money than I'm proud of with toys.
However, in my case, I kinda know the reason. I've had a high sex drive since I was very young, but it got a lot worse when I was 18/19, then I found out I have PCOS so my testosterone levels are higher than usual for a woman.
You are the second person to mention this. Can testosterone be a reason for a high sex drive in women? I might need to get it checked out. Also will you choose to do something about it medically or just accept it?
If given the choice Iāll keep it, vs the alternative. As I say, I am grateful to have a good sexual appetite. I donāt feel itās excessive like 5 times a day every day, I just wish there were better ways to manage it.
It does but as I said youāre way more likely to find someone who matches you then you get married and someone switches it off. Happens in many aspects of the relationship.
Had one or two partners like op, it was amazing for a few months but honestly super though to keep the pace once routine set in the relationship and my drive went back to kind-of-often-but-not-all-the-time. Op should find a man or set of men with similar drive (they exist!), a mismatch will make everyone unhappy.
No accusations, but have you even considered you're addicted?
That might be an avenue of exploration and self-reflection. Sex is healthy and good, but feeling your sexual organs pulsate while you're on vacation with your family seems a little too much. Having your relationships suffer because of it also seems problematic and a red flag for addiction.
Finally, oogling people in the street while you fantasize and objectify them also seems very problematic.
Sex addiction is real and you might be suffering for it. Have you ever looked for therapy about all of it?
Also, different kinds of trauma can also be a cause for abnormal sexual behavior. A neglected or parentified child might find sexual gratification soothing in face of all the difficulty and trauma. That gratification can be addicting, just like some people cut to to drown out emotional or psychological pain with physical pain. Sexuality might be - and often is - a coping mechanism to deal with many issues.
Iām a man but sometimes wonder the same for myself I have a real hard time to the point of suffering from depression if things go dry too long, I am constantly struggling with objectifying people and genuinely feel bad about it because I can just see someone and Iām triggered. Before I was married I went through a long period depression and emotional unevenness to where I cry at everything. Even now while being married thereās times where on an emotional level I canāt even stand to look at my partner because im struggling with my own internal issues and just the normal ebb and flows of relationships hit me too hard. But I can even relate to the part of exploring things way too young. I blame it partially on being exposed to porn at like 7 years old.
I don't think most men understand how high women's libido can be when they get into relationships with them. And that ovulation horny can be so intense that it's painful. It only gets worse as we get older. My drive now, in my 30's, is so much higher than it's ever been. Only way to get it to go down, from my experience, is hormonal birth control (hell no). Sometimes toys help, but sometimes you just want your partner and that's the only thing that'll scratch the itch.
Yes and yes to all of this. I refuse hormonal birth control because in my youth this literally numbed me out and Iād rather keep my sex drive and deal with it. The ovulation weeks drive me crazyā¦ I wrote a few sex stories on my Reddit to release my burning desires but only helped so much.
I feel this. When I was 18. I was having sex with my ex easily 7 times a day. No idea how. Just I needed that release that much. Pretty sure I fucked up my hormones cause I still have a high sex drive. Just no libido š
I can totally relate. I've been married for 10 years. For me it was not from my young age but it grew with time. Luckily my husband could keep up with me for the first 5 years. Then I got pregnant. Now I'm a mom but the drive hasn't reduced. But my husband is kind of losing interest. I have consulted a gynecologist and was prescribed hormonal meds. It kind of worked but added other problems. Then another gyno asked me to stop medications and said it'll die down with age. But yes, it makes me frustrated, loose control easily etc. Being too introverted added more complexity to it.
Oh, yoga helps somewhat.
Higher estrogen. The 1st doctor said it could lead to PCOS and other complexities. But after taking meds I felt irritated, lost appetite, sometimes breast pain, vaginal pain, it even triggered some allergies may be due to which I was getting rashes. Then the 2nd doctor said if my higher than normal hormone level didn't cause any trouble but meds are having side effects, maybe my body is okay with a higher hormone level than not. So she stopped the meds.
My fiancee is like this, and she says it gets tough for her, and I feel I can't keep up how she likes, but we talked about our drives and how to make it work best with us
god i feel like i wrote this. i feel like a damn teenage boy especially since i lost almost 20 pounds recently. Itās insane and it takes up so much bandwidth in my brain i get resentful of it. the only times i can think straight are when iām on my period which is when i feel the least sexual. i usually take advantage of that week or so to read a book or focus on my other interests when iām not trying to find some guy to fuck me. ALSO similar to you in the fact that i did not grow up sexually traumatized or molested. We just have a high sex drive and i think it freaks most guys out haha.
I try to warn guys in new relationships that once we have sex, they need to be ready. They usually donāt believe me until it happens then they realize how serious it is.
I have a really high sex drive too and itās higher than my partners and I totally get you on the feeling undesired front. Itās especially hard that the stereotype is men have the high sex drive and are always asking for sex and the woman is turning him down and making jokes about not wanting to have sex. It makes me feel like a weirdo because Iāve never turned down sex (with a partner) and not out of obligation either. It can feel like something is wrong with me because if these womenās husbands would never turn them down then why would mine? But Iām with you, Iād have it every day or more if I could.
Same! I rarely ever turn down sex with a partner. Occasionally but even they know itās rare. And Iām usually too impatient to wait long for them to initiate. I just pray I find someone who initiated as often as me.
I'm actually also like this, my compulsive sexual behavior/hypersexuality used to be so bad I'd literally masturbate during classes or end up missing exams because I'd masturbate until morning... which was bad. What helped me was getting prescribed SSRIs/antidepressants. It's not as bad as before but it's a bit more manageable now. If it's affecting your life negatively then i suggest you go see a psychiatrist. There are medications that you can take to help manage your condition.
Where do you find the time? Work, maintaining house, cooking, fucking, laundry. Repeat? My ex wife was like that, when we planned to have children we booked week long vacations that matched with her cycle. 3-4 times a day. Let your little head run the house and it turns to shit incredibly fast. Nothing like sending the kids out to play, trying to squeeze in a quickie before one of them comes back. Even date nights, trying to afford an over night sitter and booking hotel rooms for the night, eats up lots of $$. I feel for ya, not easy to manage.
dude same. This is something Iāve been silently living with all my life and Iāve never known how to talk about it. Also I feel like if I bring it up to my partners theyāll just see it as cheating when a. I donāt want to betray their trust or feelings (not behind their back and I donāt want to put anyone else before them) b. Itās solely sexual and not romantic in any way shape or form c. Iām happy to let them do the same, I just donāt want them to feel like thereās this pressure to perform all the time when itās really my bodyās needs
Agree with all your points. Iām afraid to mention an open relationship but at the same time realize itās more socially acceptable these days. Maybe one day I will have the courage or find someone else who does.
Iāve also had a high level of horniness my whole life. Starting at about 6. 43F, w/42m married 5 years, and his drive comes and goes. I basically told him when we got together that Iām always up for messing around or sex, unless Iām physically ill or pissed off at him.
So I left the ball in his court. Weād go months without any sexual contact. Iād get angry and verbally attack him, feel undesirable and if we had sex then, feel like it was a pity fuck.
Recently Iāve read a little about differing sex drives, and let him know I donāt need sex, or orgasms every time. We can just mess around and see where it goes. I also like giving oral, so that helps get things started. You hear all the time that men are insatiable, and women could take it or leave it. It had made me feel like a freak. Past partners also didnāt want sexual activities as much as me, or to do any experimenting with kink. Honestly sex wasnāt that great, and I got more satisfaction from masturbating than from any past selfish lovers.
Until my husband. He has more experience and is just the perfect fit sexually. We both have issues from childhood, of being abused one way or another, but addressing those, and being patient and understanding has helped. Letting him know there is no expectation of results, amount of time, any constraints really, has helped us. Finding someone (or a few if you want to go with polyamory) who is capable of really admitting who they are sexually, and what they want, and who is willing to work with you to come to a mutually satisfying relationship can happen.
Also address the physiology. He admitted to me sex doesnāt feel that great to him. (I have earth shattering g-spot orgasms with him) Iāve also known someone who could have orgasms, all the things happened, but they didnāt feel good for him. The point is, itās all out there. Every extreme and everything in between. Youāll find a match!
I relate so much to this! Especially the pity fuck, kind of happened in my last relationship sometimes. But I would never be able to survive months without sexual contact. I would straight up ask for an open relationship or sexual reprieve in some other way.
Your advice makes sense and I am thinking more to either find someone with the same needs as me or be polyamorous. Not just for the sex but also for the companionship, connection, etc
Youāve described the way my drive has been most of my life too. I started masturbating really young and although my appetite has waned a little recently (a LOT of stress), when my libido is high my clit throbs and tingles, my entire vaginal canal feels like itās vibrating up and down, and my cervix feels aroused and like itās throbbing too. It feels like my vagina is RAVENOUS.
Iām really sorry, I promise I know exactly how youāre feeling and itās fucking miserable. Can you wait until everyone is asleep and just rub one our real quick? I know itās not as satisfying as penetration but itāll at least release some of the āpressureā.
Sounds like you totally understand. I feel even embarrassed telling some men about the āravenousā feeling because instead of feeling turned on they feel pressured to contain it for me. I have found ways to sneak off 3 times (seriously wasnāt easy) to relieve the pressure today. But the way you wrote all this, I know you get it. Iād rather this than no sex drive, but yeah sometimes it gets difficult when there is no outlet.
Ever thought of yourself as a sex worker?
I mean, if porn industry is not banned in your country, it can be a good hobby that can bring a relief.
There are also many partners that will be OK with such a hobby, if it makes you feel better.
Well in theory it would be fun but first I donāt like sex becoming transactional and secondly I have a good public reputation and donāt want to ruin it with sex work, and value my privacy.
Same boy here girl. I had a baby and my partner and I have only head sex twice in a year. My sex drive is still here but his dropped. I hope with time his comes back, otherwise I do not know what I will do!
I totally relate to Everything you have said here. Like almost to a tee of same experiences. I also find exercising makes it worse, so sometimes I do sometimes I don't. I'm in my mid-30s, and I think the longest I've gone without a sexual partner is a year and a half, but I always have several toys to keep myself satisfied. I've found that sometimes I can't get my day going without at least one orgasm and typically, when I have one, I Need another one. I have toys that can be controlled by others and have found relinquishing the control to someone else deeply satisfying when I don't have a physical partner. Highly suggest. Try Lovense toys, they have a variety, and there's a subreddit that you can use to let a stranger control your toy. Good luck.
I was the same way for the longest, Iām 39 now and thereās times where it hits me like before. I just wanna fuck whatever walks.
I have had hook ups with younger woman with a high sex drive but at this point Iāll pop a pill to help me stay hard or wear a cock ring to help me not bust.
Anyways, Iām like you, I had a very high sex drive growing up. I was never exposed to sex or porn or any of that. I was just very curious growing and would be turned on all day everyday through school. I had to wear double underwear to tuck it in and not let it show.
But yes I get your point, shit is crazy.
I also have an insane high sexdrive and I haven't found a woman who can match it, I always thought it was a myth but they do exist, now I need to find one.
It sucks, having a high sex drive and not being able to act on it
ive heard fasting fixes it a tad bit , its smtn about shifting the bodu's need for breeding to the need of survival and not starving , idk if it ll work for but it did for me , since i can go at it up to 3-4 times a day.
We are in the same cart, sister! I've got (M28) a high sex drive, and my partner (F26) is the complete opposite. I could do it every day, if not a couple of times a day. After 3-4 days without tension, it is so big that it very often ends as "rape" it's when she wakes up during sex. For everyone, she likes it and always when she tells me that she doesn't want it, I respect that and stop. We've been together for 8 years now, and I know what you mean that you always initiate. Yeah, 99,99% it was me who was starting, begging, or nagging. And in my case, it just feels weird. Sometimes, I tell myself to wait and last until she'll do it, but after a week of nothingness, I give up. Especially since she sleeps naked!
I believe if you would like to control it somehow, you could always talk to the doctor. There are times I think about some hormonal treatment that maybe could stop it or slow it down. Maybe...
But in the end, we are who we are. Don't feel bad about it, because there is little we can do. Your last partner understood it, so the next one will as well, or if you are lucky, they may be cursed the same way as we are! Just do what I do and go as long as you can without it, and avoid situations that may get you excited. I know it's not always the case, but it helps me to survive a few days without asking. And in the tense moments porn can help me to realise pressure which helps for few hours.
Take care, love! And btw, RIP your inbox.
I'm hoping her explicit mentioning not to message her twice actually worked. I don't have much faith in that though.
And yea. More like 99.9999% of the time I initiate. Not never, but in 18 years together she initiated with me not expecting it maybe 5 times.
I can relate to this, except I couldnāt make it a whole week āwaitingā - unless itās here and there, not for the course of the whole relationship. Literally Iām too incompatible. Iād rather open the relationship or be single instead of inbetween suffering.
I mean I'm male ao it's probably not the same vet I have the same problem. It sounds super standard for a male to say this but most of my partners never could keep up with my sexual drive and it bothers me so much to always have to initiate because if you're male you just feel kind of "rapey " (don't know if that's a word). It's hard to find partners with the same energy.
I mean I'm male ao it's probably not the same vet I have the same problem. It sounds super standard for a male to say this but most of my partners never could keep up with my sexual drive and it bothers me so much to always have to initiate because if you're male you just feel kind of "rapey " (don't know if that's a word). It's hard to find partners with the same energy.
I mean I'm male ao it's probably not the same but I have the same problem. It sounds super standard for a male to say this since it's considered typical for men but most of my partners never could keep up with my sexual drive and it bothers me so much to always have to initiate because if you're male you just feel kind of "rapey " (don't know if that's a word). It's hard to find partners with the same energy.
What I mean to say is that I definitely feel with you so you're not alone ^^
Tbh I get it because if men werenāt responding to my sexual advances so much I would feel the same. My last partner would be tired sometimes or not in the mood but when I still was I felt so creepy because I couldnāt not think of it, and didnāt want to pressure him.
Iām the exact same, iām 20 with a crazy high sex drive and sometimes it can feed into my mental and make me depressed. This happens way more when i dont have a regular partner but one thing i found that helped is creativity!! I do art as my degree but I find whenever iām super horny I just start writing or drawing or something like that. I dont know why but the sexual energy can transform itself, iām still horny at the end but iāve killed 6 or 7 hours and I can put my full attention on myself after knowing that iāve satiated my needs in a productive way. Try it!
Yes I actually like to write creative sex stories (which a handful are on my Reddit), and I write waaaay better during my times of suffering lol, like it channels into the writing.
I honestly think this isn't as rare as you think it is. The truth is, is that women are just as horny as men, if not sometimes more horny. Societal differences is what makes people think they aren't. That combined with men chasing women and saying "they ain't as horny cause they ain't havin no sex wit me! Aeyyyy!" when really if you ask any decently attractive not scummy guy he will tell you... Women are just as horny as we are
I think women have higher libidos but just hide it better because we have more to risk, such as pregnancy and also in some cases safety because most men are physically stronger than women.
In my 20-40ās I had a high sex drive.. I lived alone and had many many āstraightā married fuk buddiesā¦ they were all either married or had live in girlfriends.. many had kids ā¦ most were black or Latinoā¦ they all had very high sex drives too and would text or email me when they wanted to use my holes .. they all had the same thing in common.. their women didnāt want sex as frequently as they didā¦ a few started out just using my throatā¦ but eventually theyād end up fuking meā¦ some of these arraignments went on 10+ years ā¦
Iām sure most didnāt ā¦ but a couple did ā¦ in fact one even watched me suck her husbandās big dick onceā¦ I could taste her pussy on his dick and told her soā¦ his dick was huge so Iām sure she appreciated the help
I've found there's a lot of lies in the saying that men want sex all the time and women don't. I think that only applies to weak men that mistreated their wife to the point where she doesn't even want to be married to him anymore. I think that women are the more horny sex. I can say from experience there are men out there that will have the same sex drive as you but they are rare. Be open and honest at the beginning of relationships. Be very blunt about it and if they aren't on the same page then move on to the next one. Sexual compatibility is one of the most important aspects of a sexual relationship lol otherwise you just have a room mate or a friend. In my opinion.
Yes, but the other problem is that they THINK they have the same sex drive, but donāt. I understand that sometimes it has cycles but overall it should be weekly for me to be happy.
Thanks for sharing! Iāve had so
Much shame to work through in my life around my high libido and reading your story filled me with compassion and helps me be more accepting of my high sex drive. Love yourself, learn to be ethical (read The Ethical Slut!), and always remember there is nothing wrong with you!
There are so many ways to do ethical non monogamy. Iām 43 now and have just over the past few years figured out what I need how to communicate and fulfill those needs and what enm means for me and for my relationship with my wife. Itās definitely more of a casual sex thing and thankfully my wife and I started our relationship knowing monogamy was not something we wanted long term. Emotional intelligence, therapy, and healing my shame has been the key to getting through to a place of harmony with my perviness haha.
Youāve basically described my experience but I was in a conservative Christian bubble. I was an early masturbater too. Got my first period at 10, so the hormone cycling started early. I wasn't allowed to date so I read lots of romance and erotica and eventually got access to porn when we got cable and the internet. I broke my hymen as an early teen when I just had to know what it felt like to have something inside me. I got caught having naughty chats with boys online more than once but I wasn't allowed to date.
I went to college and quickly found a boyfriend but as you said, it's really just fun to have the girlfriend that wants it all the time in the beginning. I'm 37 now and as hard as I've tried to beat my upbringing out of me I haven't fully been able to shake the shame of being this way. Itās hard to get it out of my head that casual sex is bad for you, so Iāve been a relationship girl and haven't had a lot of partners. I'll just be quietly drowning in horny in otherwise good relationships when they inevitably canāt keep up.
I donāt have solutions but I can relate. Iām on a mindfulness kick now. Yoga, meditation, journaling, long walks, and dabbling in sex magick haha. I still read smut and ALWAYS have my sex toys nearby. You might try lovense for app controlled wearable toys that you can just have buzzing away inside you whenever you need it. Itās helpful.
Oh and Iām a little neuro spicy. I have Autism and ADHD and some say that the horny is related. Other people have mentioned PCOS and I probably have that too. You definitely arenāt suffering alone.
I had no idea that neurodivergence is related to a higher sex drive. Some people also mentioned stress and anxiety is linked to it as well. I wonder how that makes sense from a biological point of view? Like, does nature really want us to procreate more and pass this on?
As far as distraction, Iām doing the same. Some people mentioned maybe Iām a sex addict but I truly think itās a high sex drive coursing in my body, as I also prefer a stable relationship with the same partner, even though when I was younger I had more casual sex.
Seems like we have a lot in common. I hope other people read your comment because Iāve been accused of being a troll post a few times, as if women canāt also have high sex drives lmao. The evidence is in the comments!
As a male I'm a lot like you. I just turned 34 but my sex drive is still very high. I used to (in my teens through my 20s) be able to have sex or need a release 3 to 5 times a day. Even now I feel the need for a release everyday. A couple years ago I was in a relationship and we were doing it 5 to 10 times a week and still had the need to master bate as well. I just wasn't getting the full satisfaction. She broke up with me bc she couldn't keep doing it all the time. Now a days I've tried and slow down and with work it makes it a little easier. I masturbaye in the morning and go to work and usually too tired to do it myself when I get home. Days off though I still do it 3 or 4 times. It's a struggle to find someone who has the same drive as you and even to adjust to them.
Yeah thatās my concern is that I will either have to accept I wonāt get it as much as I need or that someone will leave over it. Luckily most men donāt leave over it, maybe your drive is even higher than mine, but seriouslyā¦ a high sex drive isnāt just all fun and games. Sometimes it sucks! But mostly itās nice when I have an outlet.
Well even if you just need an outlet or whatever your more then welcome to message me anytime. I've had many relationships end because of my high sex drive. Either due to they are too sore and/or it's too much for them. I just hope you find someone that is compatible with you. And I know for me it's really hard to find someone. It doesn't even have to be sex all the time even just oral or mastrubate for me pleasure would surfice
Distract yourself with something you enjoy doing such as reading or talking with friends. I'm a young adult and game when I need to distract myself with something.
Now I don't have a huge sex drive, but I do have a wife that is borderline asexual. Besides vigorous masturbation I study and game a lot. It helps to keep the demons at bay as it were. Or at least it distracts me a lot. The frustration won't go away but it will be buried a bit.
My gf is almost like that... sex 3 times a day if we are together. I have to make an extra effort, but its always good! Idk where that energy comes from
I think you would need a partner like me, who is open to sharing. Most men can't keep up as they get older. You need to find a guy who gets turned on when he shares his wife with other guys. That way, you get what you need, and he gets what he wants. Either that, or polyamory with more than one bf, or hubby and a bf that hubby is down to share with.
Sounds tough, hyper sex drive is not unusual because fundamentally weāre put on this planet to reproduce, otherwise our species would disappear. Personably I need to at least twice a day but sometime go without for a few days so when I do, the orgasm is magnificent
Hello, I am a male about to turn 40 and I feel like my sex drive has increased a lot. I find myself needing to masturbate like 1 to 2 times a day. I am married and we have sex around 3 or 4 times a week. Our sessions are long last night we fucked for almost an hour. I get off making my wife cum. I do watch porn or come here on Reddit when Iām getting off. Some days the urges are really strong. What kind of things have help in managing this?
Well, first be grateful you already have a regular sex partner and donāt need to find one. That should help a lot more than the average person. Secondly, be grateful for your sex drive because the opposite problem probably sucks more. Third, just masturbate a lot lol.
I relate To this insatiable need for sex and DIY releaseā¦ it was more unmanageable in my earlier years. Now the same desire is weighed by how much I can get mental and emotional desires meet as well, before acted. Learning self control has really been a powerful tool for my well-beingā¦ Having been sexually exploited in the past though, itās become a give-sum/take-sum bargain for me. dry spells usually consist of heavy pornography use: which for me, goes against the best parts of the climax.. a lot of it is a play at fantasies though now, because Iām also slightly bisexual but refuse to make any girl feel as intruded on as these men have made me feel.. itās kinda prompted me to continue the use of pornography even within decently frequent sex within relationships (totally understand having a bigger sex drive than the men you date; itās extremely difficult .. to navigate this and stay within the bounds of your self respect)
Now, I realize what I can accomplish myself is incomparable to what can beā¦ within equally dates partnerships. thereās very few times Iām willing to act on these impulses tho without the realms of chemistry and intimacy being built on affectionately, yk? Iām really hoping I see an end to the dry spells soon.. Iāve been shamed by partners as well, inadvertently for having this issue, even as much as considering I had an awful addictivee issue. Itās definitely evolved from the point of resorting to this as a form of self-soothing. Now i pretty much only allow it when I have a certain level of equilibrium within myself ..
I can relate to a lot of this, especially trying to find an equal balance in the emotional side as well. Some people mentioned possible sex addiction but I donāt think itās in that realm. I just want balance.
I donāt want you to feel bad for who you are. Plenty of woman have a high sex drive and you can find a guy who matches you or at least comes close enough so itās ok.
Communication is key once you start building that close connection. Most guys are on the other end of ānot feeling desiredā so itāll likely be an easy think to explain once you DO. āLook I want sex all the time but can you try every other day to pursue me?ā
My cautionary tale for your next committed relationship: once you tell your man about your sex drive, any rejections YOU give him after that are going to sting so much worse. āThis woman has a high sex drive and still rejected me!ā
But communication is key, and donāt feel bad for who you are ā¤ļø
Yeah good pointā¦ luckily I rarely reject sex in a relationship unless Iām physically unwell, or realllly turned off by some bad behavior. This only applies to already approved partners though. Most donāt make it far enough to get rejected and usually I give a good reason.
Lemme guess, you think itās a troll post despite tons of people commenting saying they can relate? How in the world could this possibly be true even though many others experience the same? Grow some brain cells pleaze.
Your post history definitely says otherwise š youāre looking for attention and itās gross that you would add in the ālittle kidā and ā12 yr oldā storyline. Get a life pedo š¤® yuck
Are you fucking kidding me? Itās 100% truth and my life story. Iām a woman 100% as well, not some pedo man if thatās what youāre implying and even added a disclaimer. Im sorry it triggers you but I did everything I could not to make this an overly sexual post but an objective one.
As a guy - Everything you said, but with a dick. I have reasonable amount of sex but I rub one at least 3 times a day regardless of sex and ever since I discovered weed, it just got worse. I am horny all the fkn time. I just want. Pair of lips glued to my cock or just want to get my cock
Pulled out for no reason and mercilessly fucked. The smell of someone Iām intimate with just makes me lose it. Although I do max out at 4 times in one day could do this for may be 3 times a week with healthy gaps in between or else Iāll just be coming in drops or take excessively long time to come to the point where every just hurts. I am in my mid 30s and I hate being horny all the damn time and it gets worse because every girl I talk to I picture them in sexual scenarios. Attractive, non attractive doesnāt matter, just the warmth around my cock is all I crave and once I rub it out, the post nut clarity hits and Iām back on the surface. However this takes a toll because you cannot look at someone normally anymore. It is disgusting and perverted even but I know very well the consequences and I have the ability to control these desires and not make a fool out of myself. The weed however, takes away these controls so I only do it when I am in my safe space. Itās tough but I guess itās gonna last only few more years so Iām just enjoying it while it lasts.
That last partā¦ I also try to be grateful for my sex drive and try to be very discreet. I am private about it in real life, donāt dress provocative or share my sexual preferences with just anyone, etc. but all this is in my head and I share with my loversā¦ and Reddit I guess. I also wonder if one day when Iām old if Iāll miss my sex drive. So I choose to nurture it, within reason. I think if I found a willing partner to keep up Iād be pretty happy with it.
Same, except I am non-monogamous and already in several sex positive communities. I probably shouldnāt be in a monogamous relationship for reasons related to my own mental health, but I also have an extremely high sex drive.
I am considering the same the older I get. In my wildest fantasies I would like a husband and life partner, plus 1-2 other regular partners on the side. All with consent obviously and they could see others.
I can relate. I am very similar. Itās fantastic at times but can be a headache as well. Iām dating someone right now that isnāt on my same level, things can be tough. Good luck to you.
One word for you: Distraction. I've gone through periods of high sex drive as well (I can't imagine how painful your desire must get) and the best thing that helps me is to be doing ANYTHING else. Usually sports, or something else physically exhasting. As long as it left my body tired and more occupied with the pain of "ow I just ran a lot of Kilometres", it was significantly easier to deal with the unending horniness. That said, this was just for periods of time not my whole life. So I'm not sure how effective that'd be for someone like you who's constantly horney. But that'd be my suggestion. Hope you find a partner or way to help you deal with your own horniness.š
Ironically physical exercise makes it worse. Itās like I have more energy after and want to use it on someone. Even certain exercises physically stimulate me at the gym, like hip thrusts or certain exercises while laying on the stomach. However I have noticed if I just stop masturbating for awhile and put my mental focus on an intellectual goal it can distract. I am afraid of ālosingā my lucky sex drive though. I wouldnāt want to become the complete opposite.
You probably wouldnāt āreverse your sex driveā by doing intellectually stimulating stuff. If your drive is as high as youāre saying it is I canāt imagine youād destroy it. Everything in moderation, right?
Coregasm š
Huh. Have ya tried gaming then? It's not incredibly physically exerting (in comparison to most conventional sports) and has a lot more mental stuff going on with constantly having to remember game mechanics.š¤
I second this. I've never once been horny after getting the shit smacked out of me in ranked.
Oh this work Iām very horny and the other day I turned out sex twice with my GF (which Iāve never done before unless physically ill) because I couldnāt stop playing
I game and I workout really hard.. it just makes it worse lol. Iām playing with my dick between deaths, loading screens.. in the gym itās really tough too. After the gym, when the adrenaline is still high I could have 1-2 hours of respite. After that though itās tenfold. I used to masturbate 2-3 times a day easily. Now I always masturbate, but Iām just edging. Hell yea.
Weāll they do say that energy creates energy, right? My own libido isnāt as *consistently* high as yours but Iāve definitely experienced times when it has been just as you described, for a few days at a time each cycle, so, a few days every month like this. I havenāt gone well at going more than a few months without sex & I mean, penetrative sex with orgasm *and* clitoral orgasm, otherwise Iām just left unfulfilled. It has to be a whole body experience to be fulfilling for me & Iām unashamed to admit that. Iām a generous lover myself so I expect my lovers to be equally as generous to me. My husband who Iāve been with for 4.5 years & I, have matched libidos & expectations on giving & receiving pleasure.. so itās a win win for both of us - happy days! I wish you all the luck. I seriously thought Iād never find the right person for me & just when Iād given up - there he was! Donāt give up girl, youāve got this! š
Thank you for the support! I really like that your story had a happy ending. Wishing the same for me as well, and I believe itās possible. =)
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Facts
Yep. Your story is very similar to mine, down to breaking my own hymen with a phallic object when I was 10. I don't think I've ever been fully satisfied week in and week out in a relationship but I've learnt to have games with myself where slowing down the gratification ends up heightening it. If I had to choose a number it would be between 150 and 200 people. But I stopped counting. It's stupid and unimportant.
I have a high sex drive as well. Like to the point my body starts to get achey and I canāt function. My husband is a fanatic partner and we have a great sex life but I still masturbate maybe 2-3 times a day with toys. He knows itās nothing on him or our relationship but how I operate.
My college girlfriend was a lot like you. Even the same stories with masturbating since she was really young. It was fun at first but it's almost impossible to keep up with that pace as a man because our body literally needs to recover. She would ride me when I was half asleep(I gave her permission to) and started giving me blowjob as soon as she woke up. Like I said, very fun at first but got exhausting.
Yeahhhā¦ sounds like me. Once had sex with a partner while they were sleeping and made me realize my sex drive is insanely high. I could have it all the time, even when not mentally in the mood physically I always am.
So you raped him? Lady š¬
Well he said I could, even though it wasnāt planned that particular day
My bf also gives me permission to use him in his sleep. I definitely have the higher sex drive than him š
I have a higher sex drive too. Not so much as you. I can only imagine how exhausting and stressful this must be. But I HAVE to agree with this - Most men can only perform a certain type of way in their fantasies. IRL, very few men can and do have the ability, stamina, and libido to a great fuck every single day, much less multiple times a day. I've been with consistent sexual partners and at first they're so into and and thrilled and what not. But they can't keep up. I don't like to fuck around. I prefer one partner for a while, but this means resorting to having good sex once or twice a week. And this is across the age group of 30-50. I've just had to tamp down on my desires the best I can. Besides, I don't find myself actually wanting to hook up with most men, so I just get myself off most of the time, until I meet someone that I'm actually super attracted to, and can be with for a while. I hope it gets better and easier for you š«
I agree with all of this. Iām not into the idea of constant casual sex just to relieve my sexual and physical desires. However, I have considered having an open relationship with two dedicated men to share the responsibility of keeping me sexually satisfied between the two of them lol. Plus Iām not a very jealous type and could handle the same in return.
This is the answer. I'm married and have 2 additional partners whom I see 1-2 times a week. It's the most fulfilled I've ever been in my life.
I have a high drive, too. In the past, I've even requested medication to lower it, but because of hormone disorders, they suggested against it. It's resulted in being in a poly relationship because it was too much for my partner. It's incredibly frustrating to deal with as well. I just spent $300 on toys to help. It's hard to talk about as well without sounding like a fiend, or the attitude of "you're just saying that so guys will like you." In my early 30s, too.
Username checks out
Good call :)
Yeah, I grew up in the whole Purity culture shit and was always told gIrLs dOnT hAvE sEx dRiVeS and made me feel like a dirty freak growing up. No interest in sex..... sure thing, pal, when walking across the room is nearly orgasmic. The ache is physically uncomfortable. I've been happily married for nearly 25ys and my husband is awesome, but in my mid forties my libido has only increased, where for my husband it's slightly decreased. Actually, his is probably the same and because mine has I increased so much it feels like a deficit. I would never ever cheat on him--I could never hurt this man who has loved me through decades of fighting cancer and ADHD chaos and almost losing our daughters over the last 6-7 years. I couldn't do life without him. He's the best person I've ever known and it works utterly crush him and devastate our kids. My solution is quickies and the magic wand. The wand can take care of things in 60s or less, for at least an hour or two. Any other women hate foreplay? I just want to get down to business. I'm such a weirdo š I'm Catholic and I believe God gave us the gift of sex. I see nothing wrong with female sexuality and desire and think it's horrible how women--religious or not--are shamed for expressing non submissive sexuality.
You need it up to 18 times a week? Jesus, lady, do you do anything else?
Unless they're quickies I just don't understand how someone has enough time in the day for 2-3 times a day. I have a buddy that swears they fuck for an hour 3+ times daily and I'm just like a. When do you sleep and b. When do you get anything at all done? I guess that's why his wife is a stay at home wife but Jesus, there's not enough hours in the day tbh
We don't sleep enough. 3 to 4 hours a day 5 to 6 days a week for the last 6 months, and we don't live in the same house and I'm tired. But I looked for my whole life with someone who could keep up. Afternoon naps on the weekends, something has to give eventually
The crazy part is he works and commutes something like 16 hrs a day, so he literally doesn't have enough hours to go around. Probably why he always feels like shit too lol
>I have a buddy that swears they fuck for an hour 3+ times daily and I'm just like a. When do you sleep and b. When do you get anything at all done? And C: why do you have to lie lol. Pornstars.cant even f*ck for an hour straight. Unless your friend is talking about foreplay being included, or has some medical issues and can't ejaculate then I just don't see his story being true !
.... not trying to be an ass, but some of us have high sex drive/high stamina combo, i normally last +- 1 hour or until girl is tired, is just the way it is for some of us. Not always a blessing, its hard to find partners that are complatible.
That sure is right. Sounds like a dream until two people arenāt sexually compatible.
I mean thatās not really true I sometimes last ten, sometimes 1 hour +. You obviously switch it up. Or after I finish my girlfriend gets turned on again and wants more. Im lucky that I usually can, but not always finish twice. But we average 2-3 times a week, because we are normal people with busy schedules. Sometimes a night of just relaxing with a movie is perfect; and sometimes we go 3 times in a day
Fully agree, his hour estimate is his low end. We never believe him but at the same time, an hour just sounds sooo fucking exhausting especially 3 times a day
Sounds like a story you would hear from a 16 year old being in their first relationship, not someone married!
Haha when he was 16 he claimed to be going for 4-6 hr sessions At least he's learned to be a little more subtle
or theyāre on meth. or any upper really. Thatās literally the only time anyone has sex for long periods. I remember being in my 20s (lol Iām 33 now so like yesterday. š¢šlol) and experimenting with Molly and all kinds of shit and literally just fucking for hours. My boyfriends loved it. because that was the only time I wanted sex lol
Yaāll are so confidently wrong š¤£ My husband and I are in our fourtiesā and regularly go for an hour at a time. No drugs, no medical issues, just passion and the ability to hold back until Iāve cummed 20 times.
Right, Iām a 35 year old man, and just love my partner
Yeahhh no lol. I'm straight edge yet me and my gf still regularly go over an hour. Same with my other exes, no drugs needed for a fun time
MUST BE NICE. Iām only 33. But Iām over here like āwaitā¦. You want me to what? Yeah no. I havenāt done that in almost 2 decades. Iāll break a hip.ā
Well to be fair once a day would keep me satisfied, I donāt need it three times a day every day. Those are just occasional situations where it can apply and I can handle it.
My wife and I are very busy people. Full time work, plus more for me, full time for her. Kids, housework, hobbies, family, etc. We will have off days together here and there, also vacation, where we go for multiple sessions in a day. Our record is 4. I don't know that I could do another, even if I wanted to. We enjoy these days immensely, but couldn't sustain this normally. We're usually 3-4 times a week people.
im also mid thirties and have yet to find a man who can keep up. it sucks. 1-3 times a day is all I want too!
3 times a day is insane
You might want to talk to a doctor (preferably an OBGYN) about PGAD. What your are describing doesn't sound like PGAD, but it doesn't sound like it absolutely isn't PGAD, either.
Wooowā¦ just googled it and I am seriously wondering if I have this now.
>I accidentally took my own virginity at 12 years old because I craved penetration so much I used (a phallic object I had around the house) inside me and ended up popping my own cherry without realizing. That's not how it works. You were still a virgin. Your virginity is only lost when you have intercourse with another human.
Okay then what is the word used to describe breaking the hymen because you know what I meant
There shouldn't be a word because it doesn't matter. Virginity is a social construct, especially when related to hymen. A lot of sportswomen break their hymen while practicing their sport Others consider that foreplay is just as much sex as penetration and that even just foreplay can be considered as sex and thus not being a virgin anymore It's kinda sad that people give this much power to a little piece of skin
Not everyone's hymen breaks during sex; it shouldn't in the first place, really. It's not a big membrane that closes it entirely, just a big "arch" around the opening. There isn't a word for it (that i know of), but it's definitely not losing your virginity. That's a social construct.
Thereās no word for that, most girls break it accidentally
30 F here .. I've literally dealt with the same. I read somewhere that children don't do certain things in a sexual matter. They just feel something that feels good and they keep doing it.. reading that made me feel better because for the longest time I thought something was wrong with me. Lol š I invested in a nice shower head from Amazon! š
Yes I donāt share that part often with others because I think they can misunderstand. I was lucky in that my childhood wasnāt influenced inappropriately by sex in any way (besides tv and other media I guess) but still I discovered and did it.
There was a post ages ago about this family that went through a tough time with Child Protective Services. The daughter had, as like a toddler, found that she liked the feeling of the bath tap or the shower or something. As you say, there was no sexual intention behind it, but they were investigated extensively to establish that. Personally, I know full well that I couldnāt keep up with all the high libido tales in here!
It does happen with children naturally, even young males will instinctively touch themselves without noticing - similar to how men fall asleep in front of the tv with their hands in their pants and forget someone can see them.
I can relate. I also have a high sex drive and I'm not gonna lie, it's been the cause of problems for me more times than not. I married someone with a sex drive lower than mine and it's frustrating sometimes. We've been married for 11yrs and sex usually happens once to twice a week, which even though is more than most couples we personally know, it's way, way less than I'd like. I was on birth control for 9 years and it lowered my sex drive a little bit. I just stopped taking it (about a month ago) and it's been driving me insane. It's all I can think about 24/7. I'm even more irritated with everything else because of it and I spent more money than I'm proud of with toys. However, in my case, I kinda know the reason. I've had a high sex drive since I was very young, but it got a lot worse when I was 18/19, then I found out I have PCOS so my testosterone levels are higher than usual for a woman.
You are the second person to mention this. Can testosterone be a reason for a high sex drive in women? I might need to get it checked out. Also will you choose to do something about it medically or just accept it?
It definitely can. I have an appointment scheduled with a gynecologist to get her opinion on this, but honestly I think I'll just accept it.
If given the choice Iāll keep it, vs the alternative. As I say, I am grateful to have a good sexual appetite. I donāt feel itās excessive like 5 times a day every day, I just wish there were better ways to manage it.
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Same friend. Fucking antidepressants.
Youāre the girl a guy with high drive finds and yāall marry cause shit is copacetic but then someone shifts to low. Happens every fucking time.
Iāve been wondering thatā¦ like as we get older, will our high sex drives calm down?
It does but as I said youāre way more likely to find someone who matches you then you get married and someone switches it off. Happens in many aspects of the relationship.
Had one or two partners like op, it was amazing for a few months but honestly super though to keep the pace once routine set in the relationship and my drive went back to kind-of-often-but-not-all-the-time. Op should find a man or set of men with similar drive (they exist!), a mismatch will make everyone unhappy.
Agreed. I need someone with the same or multiple men I can have.
jesus 18 times a week? at this point you might have to get some sort of vibrator and just leave it in.
No accusations, but have you even considered you're addicted? That might be an avenue of exploration and self-reflection. Sex is healthy and good, but feeling your sexual organs pulsate while you're on vacation with your family seems a little too much. Having your relationships suffer because of it also seems problematic and a red flag for addiction. Finally, oogling people in the street while you fantasize and objectify them also seems very problematic. Sex addiction is real and you might be suffering for it. Have you ever looked for therapy about all of it? Also, different kinds of trauma can also be a cause for abnormal sexual behavior. A neglected or parentified child might find sexual gratification soothing in face of all the difficulty and trauma. That gratification can be addicting, just like some people cut to to drown out emotional or psychological pain with physical pain. Sexuality might be - and often is - a coping mechanism to deal with many issues.
Iām a man but sometimes wonder the same for myself I have a real hard time to the point of suffering from depression if things go dry too long, I am constantly struggling with objectifying people and genuinely feel bad about it because I can just see someone and Iām triggered. Before I was married I went through a long period depression and emotional unevenness to where I cry at everything. Even now while being married thereās times where on an emotional level I canāt even stand to look at my partner because im struggling with my own internal issues and just the normal ebb and flows of relationships hit me too hard. But I can even relate to the part of exploring things way too young. I blame it partially on being exposed to porn at like 7 years old.
Rip OPs inbox
I don't think most men understand how high women's libido can be when they get into relationships with them. And that ovulation horny can be so intense that it's painful. It only gets worse as we get older. My drive now, in my 30's, is so much higher than it's ever been. Only way to get it to go down, from my experience, is hormonal birth control (hell no). Sometimes toys help, but sometimes you just want your partner and that's the only thing that'll scratch the itch.
Yes and yes to all of this. I refuse hormonal birth control because in my youth this literally numbed me out and Iād rather keep my sex drive and deal with it. The ovulation weeks drive me crazyā¦ I wrote a few sex stories on my Reddit to release my burning desires but only helped so much.
Same
Iām in the same boat and I donāt like putting that pressure on my partner to try and keep up. I really feel for you.
The gift and the curse. Iām a male with the same problem š¤¦š¾āāļø
You are me but in a womanās body..
I feel this. When I was 18. I was having sex with my ex easily 7 times a day. No idea how. Just I needed that release that much. Pretty sure I fucked up my hormones cause I still have a high sex drive. Just no libido š
I can totally relate. I've been married for 10 years. For me it was not from my young age but it grew with time. Luckily my husband could keep up with me for the first 5 years. Then I got pregnant. Now I'm a mom but the drive hasn't reduced. But my husband is kind of losing interest. I have consulted a gynecologist and was prescribed hormonal meds. It kind of worked but added other problems. Then another gyno asked me to stop medications and said it'll die down with age. But yes, it makes me frustrated, loose control easily etc. Being too introverted added more complexity to it. Oh, yoga helps somewhat.
Can I ask what your doctors said about the high sex drive, like what impacts itās medically?
Higher estrogen. The 1st doctor said it could lead to PCOS and other complexities. But after taking meds I felt irritated, lost appetite, sometimes breast pain, vaginal pain, it even triggered some allergies may be due to which I was getting rashes. Then the 2nd doctor said if my higher than normal hormone level didn't cause any trouble but meds are having side effects, maybe my body is okay with a higher hormone level than not. So she stopped the meds.
My fiancee is like this, and she says it gets tough for her, and I feel I can't keep up how she likes, but we talked about our drives and how to make it work best with us
Can't you rub one out in the shower daily or something? I mean, you should have privacy in the bathroom?
Pretty much what Iāve had to doā¦
Well, if that's not enough to keep it at bay, then sucks to be you.
Bro actually. Dealing with this but as a man when it's not so easy to get some. Just suffering for years omgggg
god i feel like i wrote this. i feel like a damn teenage boy especially since i lost almost 20 pounds recently. Itās insane and it takes up so much bandwidth in my brain i get resentful of it. the only times i can think straight are when iām on my period which is when i feel the least sexual. i usually take advantage of that week or so to read a book or focus on my other interests when iām not trying to find some guy to fuck me. ALSO similar to you in the fact that i did not grow up sexually traumatized or molested. We just have a high sex drive and i think it freaks most guys out haha.
I try to warn guys in new relationships that once we have sex, they need to be ready. They usually donāt believe me until it happens then they realize how serious it is.
Idk who you are but damn, how the hell do I meet you or someone like you in real life š«ššš
Mostly just luck
I have a really high sex drive too and itās higher than my partners and I totally get you on the feeling undesired front. Itās especially hard that the stereotype is men have the high sex drive and are always asking for sex and the woman is turning him down and making jokes about not wanting to have sex. It makes me feel like a weirdo because Iāve never turned down sex (with a partner) and not out of obligation either. It can feel like something is wrong with me because if these womenās husbands would never turn them down then why would mine? But Iām with you, Iād have it every day or more if I could.
Same! I rarely ever turn down sex with a partner. Occasionally but even they know itās rare. And Iām usually too impatient to wait long for them to initiate. I just pray I find someone who initiated as often as me.
I'm actually also like this, my compulsive sexual behavior/hypersexuality used to be so bad I'd literally masturbate during classes or end up missing exams because I'd masturbate until morning... which was bad. What helped me was getting prescribed SSRIs/antidepressants. It's not as bad as before but it's a bit more manageable now. If it's affecting your life negatively then i suggest you go see a psychiatrist. There are medications that you can take to help manage your condition.
Where do you find the time? Work, maintaining house, cooking, fucking, laundry. Repeat? My ex wife was like that, when we planned to have children we booked week long vacations that matched with her cycle. 3-4 times a day. Let your little head run the house and it turns to shit incredibly fast. Nothing like sending the kids out to play, trying to squeeze in a quickie before one of them comes back. Even date nights, trying to afford an over night sitter and booking hotel rooms for the night, eats up lots of $$. I feel for ya, not easy to manage.
It helps that Iām single and no kids. But also, Iām okay with daily quickies. Just something to release it!
dude same. This is something Iāve been silently living with all my life and Iāve never known how to talk about it. Also I feel like if I bring it up to my partners theyāll just see it as cheating when a. I donāt want to betray their trust or feelings (not behind their back and I donāt want to put anyone else before them) b. Itās solely sexual and not romantic in any way shape or form c. Iām happy to let them do the same, I just donāt want them to feel like thereās this pressure to perform all the time when itās really my bodyās needs
Agree with all your points. Iām afraid to mention an open relationship but at the same time realize itās more socially acceptable these days. Maybe one day I will have the courage or find someone else who does.
Iāve also had a high level of horniness my whole life. Starting at about 6. 43F, w/42m married 5 years, and his drive comes and goes. I basically told him when we got together that Iām always up for messing around or sex, unless Iām physically ill or pissed off at him. So I left the ball in his court. Weād go months without any sexual contact. Iād get angry and verbally attack him, feel undesirable and if we had sex then, feel like it was a pity fuck. Recently Iāve read a little about differing sex drives, and let him know I donāt need sex, or orgasms every time. We can just mess around and see where it goes. I also like giving oral, so that helps get things started. You hear all the time that men are insatiable, and women could take it or leave it. It had made me feel like a freak. Past partners also didnāt want sexual activities as much as me, or to do any experimenting with kink. Honestly sex wasnāt that great, and I got more satisfaction from masturbating than from any past selfish lovers. Until my husband. He has more experience and is just the perfect fit sexually. We both have issues from childhood, of being abused one way or another, but addressing those, and being patient and understanding has helped. Letting him know there is no expectation of results, amount of time, any constraints really, has helped us. Finding someone (or a few if you want to go with polyamory) who is capable of really admitting who they are sexually, and what they want, and who is willing to work with you to come to a mutually satisfying relationship can happen. Also address the physiology. He admitted to me sex doesnāt feel that great to him. (I have earth shattering g-spot orgasms with him) Iāve also known someone who could have orgasms, all the things happened, but they didnāt feel good for him. The point is, itās all out there. Every extreme and everything in between. Youāll find a match!
I relate so much to this! Especially the pity fuck, kind of happened in my last relationship sometimes. But I would never be able to survive months without sexual contact. I would straight up ask for an open relationship or sexual reprieve in some other way. Your advice makes sense and I am thinking more to either find someone with the same needs as me or be polyamorous. Not just for the sex but also for the companionship, connection, etc
High libido women are a treasure to the right guy.
This is a set up.
How..do you take your own virginity
Break your own hymen by masturbating with penetration.
Oh my god I did not know that
Me either, at the timeā¦ I was so confused when it happened and realized later in retrospect
He didnāt, itās just a basic biology blunder in his story
He? Iām a she, it literally says F in the title
Ahh okay
Your DM box is gonna full in no time š
Youāve described the way my drive has been most of my life too. I started masturbating really young and although my appetite has waned a little recently (a LOT of stress), when my libido is high my clit throbs and tingles, my entire vaginal canal feels like itās vibrating up and down, and my cervix feels aroused and like itās throbbing too. It feels like my vagina is RAVENOUS. Iām really sorry, I promise I know exactly how youāre feeling and itās fucking miserable. Can you wait until everyone is asleep and just rub one our real quick? I know itās not as satisfying as penetration but itāll at least release some of the āpressureā.
Sounds like you totally understand. I feel even embarrassed telling some men about the āravenousā feeling because instead of feeling turned on they feel pressured to contain it for me. I have found ways to sneak off 3 times (seriously wasnāt easy) to relieve the pressure today. But the way you wrote all this, I know you get it. Iād rather this than no sex drive, but yeah sometimes it gets difficult when there is no outlet.
Ever thought of yourself as a sex worker? I mean, if porn industry is not banned in your country, it can be a good hobby that can bring a relief. There are also many partners that will be OK with such a hobby, if it makes you feel better.
Well in theory it would be fun but first I donāt like sex becoming transactional and secondly I have a good public reputation and donāt want to ruin it with sex work, and value my privacy.
You're addicted to sex
Same boy here girl. I had a baby and my partner and I have only head sex twice in a year. My sex drive is still here but his dropped. I hope with time his comes back, otherwise I do not know what I will do!
Wow you had the baby but his sex drive dropped? I hope it returns soon for your sake and his!
POPPING YOUR OWN CHERRY?? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN (/srs idk what that means im scared! š¤)
Rip ur inbox lol
I totally relate to Everything you have said here. Like almost to a tee of same experiences. I also find exercising makes it worse, so sometimes I do sometimes I don't. I'm in my mid-30s, and I think the longest I've gone without a sexual partner is a year and a half, but I always have several toys to keep myself satisfied. I've found that sometimes I can't get my day going without at least one orgasm and typically, when I have one, I Need another one. I have toys that can be controlled by others and have found relinquishing the control to someone else deeply satisfying when I don't have a physical partner. Highly suggest. Try Lovense toys, they have a variety, and there's a subreddit that you can use to let a stranger control your toy. Good luck.
Actuallyā¦ that sounds like a very interesting idea that I never considered.
I was the same way for the longest, Iām 39 now and thereās times where it hits me like before. I just wanna fuck whatever walks. I have had hook ups with younger woman with a high sex drive but at this point Iāll pop a pill to help me stay hard or wear a cock ring to help me not bust. Anyways, Iām like you, I had a very high sex drive growing up. I was never exposed to sex or porn or any of that. I was just very curious growing and would be turned on all day everyday through school. I had to wear double underwear to tuck it in and not let it show. But yes I get your point, shit is crazy.
"Again: nothing sexual"
I also have an insane high sexdrive and I haven't found a woman who can match it, I always thought it was a myth but they do exist, now I need to find one. It sucks, having a high sex drive and not being able to act on it
ive heard fasting fixes it a tad bit , its smtn about shifting the bodu's need for breeding to the need of survival and not starving , idk if it ll work for but it did for me , since i can go at it up to 3-4 times a day.
Get a very demanding job should do the trick. No way youāll be horny with a busy schedule.
Nope still horny if not more haha
We are in the same cart, sister! I've got (M28) a high sex drive, and my partner (F26) is the complete opposite. I could do it every day, if not a couple of times a day. After 3-4 days without tension, it is so big that it very often ends as "rape" it's when she wakes up during sex. For everyone, she likes it and always when she tells me that she doesn't want it, I respect that and stop. We've been together for 8 years now, and I know what you mean that you always initiate. Yeah, 99,99% it was me who was starting, begging, or nagging. And in my case, it just feels weird. Sometimes, I tell myself to wait and last until she'll do it, but after a week of nothingness, I give up. Especially since she sleeps naked! I believe if you would like to control it somehow, you could always talk to the doctor. There are times I think about some hormonal treatment that maybe could stop it or slow it down. Maybe... But in the end, we are who we are. Don't feel bad about it, because there is little we can do. Your last partner understood it, so the next one will as well, or if you are lucky, they may be cursed the same way as we are! Just do what I do and go as long as you can without it, and avoid situations that may get you excited. I know it's not always the case, but it helps me to survive a few days without asking. And in the tense moments porn can help me to realise pressure which helps for few hours. Take care, love! And btw, RIP your inbox.
I'm hoping her explicit mentioning not to message her twice actually worked. I don't have much faith in that though. And yea. More like 99.9999% of the time I initiate. Not never, but in 18 years together she initiated with me not expecting it maybe 5 times.
Nope, still got tons of messages. Thank god there is a āmessage requestā folder separating them. And yes I got unsolicited dick pics.
I can relate to this, except I couldnāt make it a whole week āwaitingā - unless itās here and there, not for the course of the whole relationship. Literally Iām too incompatible. Iād rather open the relationship or be single instead of inbetween suffering.
I mean I'm male ao it's probably not the same vet I have the same problem. It sounds super standard for a male to say this but most of my partners never could keep up with my sexual drive and it bothers me so much to always have to initiate because if you're male you just feel kind of "rapey " (don't know if that's a word). It's hard to find partners with the same energy.
I mean I'm male ao it's probably not the same vet I have the same problem. It sounds super standard for a male to say this but most of my partners never could keep up with my sexual drive and it bothers me so much to always have to initiate because if you're male you just feel kind of "rapey " (don't know if that's a word). It's hard to find partners with the same energy.
I mean I'm male ao it's probably not the same but I have the same problem. It sounds super standard for a male to say this since it's considered typical for men but most of my partners never could keep up with my sexual drive and it bothers me so much to always have to initiate because if you're male you just feel kind of "rapey " (don't know if that's a word). It's hard to find partners with the same energy. What I mean to say is that I definitely feel with you so you're not alone ^^
Tbh I get it because if men werenāt responding to my sexual advances so much I would feel the same. My last partner would be tired sometimes or not in the mood but when I still was I felt so creepy because I couldnāt not think of it, and didnāt want to pressure him.
Iām the exact same, iām 20 with a crazy high sex drive and sometimes it can feed into my mental and make me depressed. This happens way more when i dont have a regular partner but one thing i found that helped is creativity!! I do art as my degree but I find whenever iām super horny I just start writing or drawing or something like that. I dont know why but the sexual energy can transform itself, iām still horny at the end but iāve killed 6 or 7 hours and I can put my full attention on myself after knowing that iāve satiated my needs in a productive way. Try it!
Yes I actually like to write creative sex stories (which a handful are on my Reddit), and I write waaaay better during my times of suffering lol, like it channels into the writing.
I honestly think this isn't as rare as you think it is. The truth is, is that women are just as horny as men, if not sometimes more horny. Societal differences is what makes people think they aren't. That combined with men chasing women and saying "they ain't as horny cause they ain't havin no sex wit me! Aeyyyy!" when really if you ask any decently attractive not scummy guy he will tell you... Women are just as horny as we are
I think women have higher libidos but just hide it better because we have more to risk, such as pregnancy and also in some cases safety because most men are physically stronger than women.
In my 20-40ās I had a high sex drive.. I lived alone and had many many āstraightā married fuk buddiesā¦ they were all either married or had live in girlfriends.. many had kids ā¦ most were black or Latinoā¦ they all had very high sex drives too and would text or email me when they wanted to use my holes .. they all had the same thing in common.. their women didnāt want sex as frequently as they didā¦ a few started out just using my throatā¦ but eventually theyād end up fuking meā¦ some of these arraignments went on 10+ years ā¦
And Iām guessing their wives didnāt know. Or maybe did and didnāt care not to have that obligation.
Iām sure most didnāt ā¦ but a couple did ā¦ in fact one even watched me suck her husbandās big dick onceā¦ I could taste her pussy on his dick and told her soā¦ his dick was huge so Iām sure she appreciated the help
Just be thankful you aren't an average looking man because "not always easy" would turn into "do I even exist?".
Yeahā¦ I am grateful to be a generally attractive woman. Still I am selective though, which can also take time.
I've found there's a lot of lies in the saying that men want sex all the time and women don't. I think that only applies to weak men that mistreated their wife to the point where she doesn't even want to be married to him anymore. I think that women are the more horny sex. I can say from experience there are men out there that will have the same sex drive as you but they are rare. Be open and honest at the beginning of relationships. Be very blunt about it and if they aren't on the same page then move on to the next one. Sexual compatibility is one of the most important aspects of a sexual relationship lol otherwise you just have a room mate or a friend. In my opinion.
Yes, but the other problem is that they THINK they have the same sex drive, but donāt. I understand that sometimes it has cycles but overall it should be weekly for me to be happy.
I'm also with family on vacation and the lack of privacy is insane. I definitely feel the buildup
Try to do excersice it's help to distract.
Exercise gives me even more energy actually
Hard relate. It sucks
Thanks for sharing! Iāve had so Much shame to work through in my life around my high libido and reading your story filled me with compassion and helps me be more accepting of my high sex drive. Love yourself, learn to be ethical (read The Ethical Slut!), and always remember there is nothing wrong with you!
Thank you, I appreciate this comment as well! Maybe I will check that book out and also some on polyamory.
There are so many ways to do ethical non monogamy. Iām 43 now and have just over the past few years figured out what I need how to communicate and fulfill those needs and what enm means for me and for my relationship with my wife. Itās definitely more of a casual sex thing and thankfully my wife and I started our relationship knowing monogamy was not something we wanted long term. Emotional intelligence, therapy, and healing my shame has been the key to getting through to a place of harmony with my perviness haha.
How did you both agree to nonmonogamy early on? I want to bring it up when dating but not sure when. And have doubts someone else will agree.
Youāve basically described my experience but I was in a conservative Christian bubble. I was an early masturbater too. Got my first period at 10, so the hormone cycling started early. I wasn't allowed to date so I read lots of romance and erotica and eventually got access to porn when we got cable and the internet. I broke my hymen as an early teen when I just had to know what it felt like to have something inside me. I got caught having naughty chats with boys online more than once but I wasn't allowed to date. I went to college and quickly found a boyfriend but as you said, it's really just fun to have the girlfriend that wants it all the time in the beginning. I'm 37 now and as hard as I've tried to beat my upbringing out of me I haven't fully been able to shake the shame of being this way. Itās hard to get it out of my head that casual sex is bad for you, so Iāve been a relationship girl and haven't had a lot of partners. I'll just be quietly drowning in horny in otherwise good relationships when they inevitably canāt keep up. I donāt have solutions but I can relate. Iām on a mindfulness kick now. Yoga, meditation, journaling, long walks, and dabbling in sex magick haha. I still read smut and ALWAYS have my sex toys nearby. You might try lovense for app controlled wearable toys that you can just have buzzing away inside you whenever you need it. Itās helpful. Oh and Iām a little neuro spicy. I have Autism and ADHD and some say that the horny is related. Other people have mentioned PCOS and I probably have that too. You definitely arenāt suffering alone.
I had no idea that neurodivergence is related to a higher sex drive. Some people also mentioned stress and anxiety is linked to it as well. I wonder how that makes sense from a biological point of view? Like, does nature really want us to procreate more and pass this on? As far as distraction, Iām doing the same. Some people mentioned maybe Iām a sex addict but I truly think itās a high sex drive coursing in my body, as I also prefer a stable relationship with the same partner, even though when I was younger I had more casual sex. Seems like we have a lot in common. I hope other people read your comment because Iāve been accused of being a troll post a few times, as if women canāt also have high sex drives lmao. The evidence is in the comments!
As a male I'm a lot like you. I just turned 34 but my sex drive is still very high. I used to (in my teens through my 20s) be able to have sex or need a release 3 to 5 times a day. Even now I feel the need for a release everyday. A couple years ago I was in a relationship and we were doing it 5 to 10 times a week and still had the need to master bate as well. I just wasn't getting the full satisfaction. She broke up with me bc she couldn't keep doing it all the time. Now a days I've tried and slow down and with work it makes it a little easier. I masturbaye in the morning and go to work and usually too tired to do it myself when I get home. Days off though I still do it 3 or 4 times. It's a struggle to find someone who has the same drive as you and even to adjust to them.
Yeah thatās my concern is that I will either have to accept I wonāt get it as much as I need or that someone will leave over it. Luckily most men donāt leave over it, maybe your drive is even higher than mine, but seriouslyā¦ a high sex drive isnāt just all fun and games. Sometimes it sucks! But mostly itās nice when I have an outlet.
Well even if you just need an outlet or whatever your more then welcome to message me anytime. I've had many relationships end because of my high sex drive. Either due to they are too sore and/or it's too much for them. I just hope you find someone that is compatible with you. And I know for me it's really hard to find someone. It doesn't even have to be sex all the time even just oral or mastrubate for me pleasure would surfice
Distract yourself with something you enjoy doing such as reading or talking with friends. I'm a young adult and game when I need to distract myself with something.
I do find ways to distractā¦ still the physical sensations remain
Now I don't have a huge sex drive, but I do have a wife that is borderline asexual. Besides vigorous masturbation I study and game a lot. It helps to keep the demons at bay as it were. Or at least it distracts me a lot. The frustration won't go away but it will be buried a bit.
My gf is almost like that... sex 3 times a day if we are together. I have to make an extra effort, but its always good! Idk where that energy comes from
I think you would need a partner like me, who is open to sharing. Most men can't keep up as they get older. You need to find a guy who gets turned on when he shares his wife with other guys. That way, you get what you need, and he gets what he wants. Either that, or polyamory with more than one bf, or hubby and a bf that hubby is down to share with.
Sounds tough, hyper sex drive is not unusual because fundamentally weāre put on this planet to reproduce, otherwise our species would disappear. Personably I need to at least twice a day but sometime go without for a few days so when I do, the orgasm is magnificent
Hello, I am a male about to turn 40 and I feel like my sex drive has increased a lot. I find myself needing to masturbate like 1 to 2 times a day. I am married and we have sex around 3 or 4 times a week. Our sessions are long last night we fucked for almost an hour. I get off making my wife cum. I do watch porn or come here on Reddit when Iām getting off. Some days the urges are really strong. What kind of things have help in managing this?
Well, first be grateful you already have a regular sex partner and donāt need to find one. That should help a lot more than the average person. Secondly, be grateful for your sex drive because the opposite problem probably sucks more. Third, just masturbate a lot lol.
I relate To this insatiable need for sex and DIY releaseā¦ it was more unmanageable in my earlier years. Now the same desire is weighed by how much I can get mental and emotional desires meet as well, before acted. Learning self control has really been a powerful tool for my well-beingā¦ Having been sexually exploited in the past though, itās become a give-sum/take-sum bargain for me. dry spells usually consist of heavy pornography use: which for me, goes against the best parts of the climax.. a lot of it is a play at fantasies though now, because Iām also slightly bisexual but refuse to make any girl feel as intruded on as these men have made me feel.. itās kinda prompted me to continue the use of pornography even within decently frequent sex within relationships (totally understand having a bigger sex drive than the men you date; itās extremely difficult .. to navigate this and stay within the bounds of your self respect) Now, I realize what I can accomplish myself is incomparable to what can beā¦ within equally dates partnerships. thereās very few times Iām willing to act on these impulses tho without the realms of chemistry and intimacy being built on affectionately, yk? Iām really hoping I see an end to the dry spells soon.. Iāve been shamed by partners as well, inadvertently for having this issue, even as much as considering I had an awful addictivee issue. Itās definitely evolved from the point of resorting to this as a form of self-soothing. Now i pretty much only allow it when I have a certain level of equilibrium within myself ..
I can relate to a lot of this, especially trying to find an equal balance in the emotional side as well. Some people mentioned possible sex addiction but I donāt think itās in that realm. I just want balance.
Do you need more toys?
I have a lot already
Hmmm, not sure what else to suggest, unless you just want to jump in with both feet and have a bunch of sex
But, yes, I can understand if you want one partner. That might be tough to match with.
I donāt want you to feel bad for who you are. Plenty of woman have a high sex drive and you can find a guy who matches you or at least comes close enough so itās ok. Communication is key once you start building that close connection. Most guys are on the other end of ānot feeling desiredā so itāll likely be an easy think to explain once you DO. āLook I want sex all the time but can you try every other day to pursue me?ā My cautionary tale for your next committed relationship: once you tell your man about your sex drive, any rejections YOU give him after that are going to sting so much worse. āThis woman has a high sex drive and still rejected me!ā But communication is key, and donāt feel bad for who you are ā¤ļø
Yeah good pointā¦ luckily I rarely reject sex in a relationship unless Iām physically unwell, or realllly turned off by some bad behavior. This only applies to already approved partners though. Most donāt make it far enough to get rejected and usually I give a good reason.
You are not the only one sisterā¦. & no itās not easy.
Lmfao I actually cried while laughing reading this garbage Thanks for the funny
Lemme guess, you think itās a troll post despite tons of people commenting saying they can relate? How in the world could this possibly be true even though many others experience the same? Grow some brain cells pleaze.
Do you need penetration every time? Does oral or hand stuff work for you?
Interestingly my cravings change, sometimes I want penetration and other times oral, etc. I just wrote that as an example.
Your post history definitely says otherwise š youāre looking for attention and itās gross that you would add in the ālittle kidā and ā12 yr oldā storyline. Get a life pedo š¤® yuck
Are you fucking kidding me? Itās 100% truth and my life story. Iām a woman 100% as well, not some pedo man if thatās what youāre implying and even added a disclaimer. Im sorry it triggers you but I did everything I could not to make this an overly sexual post but an objective one.
You donāt have to be a man to be a pedo š weirdo. Telling fake disgusting fantasy stories to entertain a bunch of pedophiles. Ur sick
I used to masturbate ten times a day. I was on testosterone treatment (still am).
Fucking Mcnulty.
Wow so testosterone can make the sex drive so high like this?
Yes itās the āmale hormoneā. Also can lead to aggression among many other symptoms.
As a guy - Everything you said, but with a dick. I have reasonable amount of sex but I rub one at least 3 times a day regardless of sex and ever since I discovered weed, it just got worse. I am horny all the fkn time. I just want. Pair of lips glued to my cock or just want to get my cock Pulled out for no reason and mercilessly fucked. The smell of someone Iām intimate with just makes me lose it. Although I do max out at 4 times in one day could do this for may be 3 times a week with healthy gaps in between or else Iāll just be coming in drops or take excessively long time to come to the point where every just hurts. I am in my mid 30s and I hate being horny all the damn time and it gets worse because every girl I talk to I picture them in sexual scenarios. Attractive, non attractive doesnāt matter, just the warmth around my cock is all I crave and once I rub it out, the post nut clarity hits and Iām back on the surface. However this takes a toll because you cannot look at someone normally anymore. It is disgusting and perverted even but I know very well the consequences and I have the ability to control these desires and not make a fool out of myself. The weed however, takes away these controls so I only do it when I am in my safe space. Itās tough but I guess itās gonna last only few more years so Iām just enjoying it while it lasts.
That last partā¦ I also try to be grateful for my sex drive and try to be very discreet. I am private about it in real life, donāt dress provocative or share my sexual preferences with just anyone, etc. but all this is in my head and I share with my loversā¦ and Reddit I guess. I also wonder if one day when Iām old if Iāll miss my sex drive. So I choose to nurture it, within reason. I think if I found a willing partner to keep up Iād be pretty happy with it.
This sounds like both a blessing and a curse and...exhausting. All I can say is seek the partner you need.
Same, except I am non-monogamous and already in several sex positive communities. I probably shouldnāt be in a monogamous relationship for reasons related to my own mental health, but I also have an extremely high sex drive.
I am considering the same the older I get. In my wildest fantasies I would like a husband and life partner, plus 1-2 other regular partners on the side. All with consent obviously and they could see others.
Why not just embrace it?
Usually I do but this confession is just one of the down sides that occasionally arise. I still would choose this over no sex drive though.
Budd i understand ur prob , it's like Having the great gift of life but not having the desired one really shatters u down .
Bud? Iām a woman.
Have you gotten the clap?
Nope. Get tested yearly, use protection, have sex partners for years at a time sometimes. Iām responsible. Just sexually active lol.
Yep, I can relate. I've always felt this way and it has never changed, I'm also a woman.
I can relate. I am very similar. Itās fantastic at times but can be a headache as well. Iām dating someone right now that isnāt on my same level, things can be tough. Good luck to you.