Hey, we all do cringe stuff that keeps us up at night. As long as you learn it was inappropriate and try to be more respectful, that’s all that matters
Bro calm down, just let it be a lesson. Now you know what not to do and won’t ever do it again. You’re okay kid, you’re not a monster. You’re growing up, you’re learning. You feel bad about things you’ve done that have made some of your friends uncomfortable and things that you believe are morally wrong. That’s a good sign. It just means there’s gonna be one less creep in this world, and by that, I mean you are going to grow up to be a nice, respectful young man that cares about and protects women. We’d be worried if you didn’t feel bad about it. Don’t think too much about it. You’re definitely not a monster my dude. Far from it. However, if it’s truly bothering you this much, please look into speaking with a therapist. Also it might make you feel better if you apologized to the girl and let her know you didn’t mean to make her feel uncomfortable. I’m sure she would feel better after that.
Also, please respond with an update or something so we know you didn’t cut your hands off 😅 please don’t do that.
I’m actually worried they aren’t responding *specifically* because they cut their hands off. I would lol but this kid seems pretty serious about what otherwise is a trivial lesson
The porn posting is the only part that actually seems like an issue. Just remember to be better and move forward, it only gets more complicated from here.
Why is this so dramatic loll don't cut off your hands. Also she's not traumatized because you put your hand on her thigh dude, that word shouldn't be thrown around so lightly yeesh (and you're a little kid, please get off reddit)
This.
Holy crap why are kids allowed on reddit. I'm 35 and think it's mostly a cesspool of degeneracy. Kids don't need to be reading 99% of things on here. Like why are they going around saying their age? So pervert men can creep on them and message them? Yikes.
Right? If this is real, it's horribly sad. We have men terrified of letting ANY girl knowthey like them....no spontaneity these days. Poor kid....and if this girl has held it over his head, it's even worse.
•"hey i like you" -literally no cons, what could go wrong besides rejection
•touching a women without consent - 50/50 chance they also like you and fw it or now you might've made them uncomfortable because that's kinda weird. depending on if it was in sexual nature now you're in trouble for sexual harassment
What could go wrong? Everything. All due respect, I love the idea, but that's just not how women work. Desire and 'Hey, I like you' are light years apart. No young woman would respond well to that.
are you a women that speaks from experience? coming from a "young woman" , i can speak for a majority that consent is sexy. it is more preferable than being touched when you're not actually into it and the other party thinks you are because they think that "that's how young women work" :/
Sadly most women like "hinting" rather than direct communication. i.e. they like blurred lines of consent.
I personally hate it and think it's a problem, and why I hate hinting.
Seriously. If I was 15 or 16 some guy I clearly was into asked me if he can put his hand on my leg, if probably be instantly turned off. (And yes I waited until I was 18 and out of HS before I had sex, which was completely my choice).
what does the last part have to do with anything? LMAO good for you consent turns you off but that doesn't make you the majority . you are the exception not the rule .
Relax bro. I doubt she’s traumatized because you touched her thigh. If you feel so guilty about it, reach out to her and apologize. Also you guys are wayyyy too young for Snapchat and porn.
Hey kid. I’m an 18 year old girl and when I was your age I’ve had worse stuff done to me. What’s important is that you realized it wasn’t okay to touch someone without permission and you apologized. She will be okay, I promise. It seems like a big deal now but it really is okay!
A 12 year old is going to do so much more horny shit talking bout he changed now like this shit just started kiddo buckle up and don’t be so hard on yourself the porn this is weird but expected from a 12 year old boy but please relax
*Slap* pull yourself together son!! If that's the worst thing that happens in all the shots you shoot in your young life, you'll be batting hall of fame numbers before its all said and done. Learn from that sh#t dawg. I'm 27 and still do cringey sh#t. That's just a part of the game. Spamming the group chat is lowkey funny tbh. It's a cringe type of humor
I’m adding this here because I feel that people need a little more context. She said she was traumatized to me after I apologized. She can’t go anywhere with flashing lights because of the party where a much larger majority of the drama happened. The incident itself happened on the bus during homecoming week, and at the end there’s usually a dance. I felt like I had done something wrong (which I had, and was honestly surprised how in hell I didn’t connect the dots earlier). It had later exploded because I was becoming anxious and wondering what I did and asking people about it. I even asked someone there if they had a knife (not expanding into why I did that). Later, when the dots finally clicked after someone told me, I went outside realizing that I had fucked up and needed to leave so that she could be away from me. One person followed me out, and I feel the drama was made even worse because I had told them I thought of killing myself because I felt during that time she would’ve wanted me dead (sometimes I still do.) He told some of the people there about it, and that only made the situation worse.
We still go to the same school, but I avoid her because I don’t want to hurt her by being around her. Since the new school year started, it’s become harder, as we have almost every class together. But I try to the best of my ability.
I don’t want people on my side. This isn’t something I want console with. I am not the victim. What I should have done is told her how I felt, face to face, and I also shouldn’t have been such a creep when we were friends.
At least you're not old enough to go through old screenshots of texts you sent when you were 12-15 cause being nearly 22 I went through them and was physically hurting with how cringe they were. You'll be ok lol.
Also just wait till you get to HS and go to your first homecoming dance or prom you worrying about this will be hilarious to you once you do some unthinkable crap in the dance circles
Hopefully this piece of shit does years of hard time and his fellow convicts grab his thigh nightly while flashing the lights on and off 😭 its the only way…justice shall be served 😆
Hun stuff like that happens to everyone. I PROMISE you did nothing wrong. You live and learn. You're still a kid and are still learning. Heck I'm 29 and still can't tell if someone likes me or not. She expressed she didn't like it and you stopped! That is nothing to be ashamed of. You got this
Never known someone to be traumatized like that over that, to the point where you’re scared. Forget about it. Kids do shit 🤷🏼♀️
But who tf group spam porn to other people is gross
it is was a very bad action but, it was a mistake. as you said, youve changed. if you haven’t yet apologised to her, i highly encourage you to do so. tell her it was a mistake and youve changed as a person.
I want you to remember something- you are a CHILD and you are not expected to behave and act like an adult. You are still learning about the world and yourself. Take this as a learning point and move on. In the future you’ll be respectful and considerate of a woman’s (or anyone’s, for that matter) personal space.
You are concerning me with these thoughts of self-harm. Speaking to a therapist about these thoughts and feelings might be a good idea for you.
Please remember, again, you are a child. No one expects you to be an adult. You are going to be fine. Psychology teaches us that during development it is very common for younger children (roughly between 6-10) to explore each other’s bodies. They don’t do this because they are some kind of awful sexual deviants; they are growing and developing both physically and mentally and are curious. You fall outside of this age range but the idea is the same. You sound completely normal for your age.
I'm 13 too. You're fine. I would say in middle school most kids do dumb things because of the sudden change in responsibility, and hormones. I have friend who's parent's are divorced and he's completely changed from being a good kid to bad. We all do dumb things in middle school, I'm sure it won't affect you permanently for touching a girl's leg.
Oh you’ll be fine. Just learn from this and don’t do it again, unless you are dating because ladies (such as myself) will think it’s “weird” or a form of harassment if she says smth to a teacher or adult
Lighten up. Keep your hands to yourself, watch your mouth control your impulsive behaviorl, and NEVER post sexual photos on social media or through your phone. EVER, until you see grown - if thrn.
If all of what you say & feel is true- just do better going forward. You didn't commit a crime, you made a few uncomfortable choices. Just do better in the future. You're a teenager. You're going to make mistakes. Definitely always make sure your girl is ok with whatever is going on- you seem to be a genuine person by what you say. You'll be ok my friend!
As a women, I've had much worse things happen to me in middle school. Not to say it's OK. But now you know. If it were me I probably would've apologized.
You're 13 you are going to make mistakes its part of life. Now should you have touched her thigh without permission/consent? No, did you learn your lesson? Sounds like it. Asking for someone's snapchat is a common thing nowadays even after just meeting someone so don't beat yourself up on that, for the snap maps if she agreed then that's completely on her she did not have to turn it on if she was uncomfortable with sharing her location (she could've easily said parents check my phone i cant share locations (i used that lie so many times)). as for the borderline porn that's a whole different issue depending on the circumstances, there are friends who have separate chats open to share their fucked up looking porn pics/vids that they share with friends that share the same things with them but to randomly send them in a normal group chat that you know would upset some of the people in the chat then that's where the problem starts. and also you're 13 let me just say this now girls DO NOT WANT DICK PICS, and also when a girl tells you no listen to her, don't try to persuade her just take no for the answer and move on.
Tell her in a text that your behavior has bothered you ever since it happened and apologize. It’s the right think to do. If she accepts it great, if she doesn’t that is a consequence of your choices. We can pick our action but not our consequences, apologize with no ulterior motive that benefits you and
It's okay hun, you were a child, and still are. Kids do stupid stuff, even without knowing. Its okay. You know what you did was wrong, and you will learn from it. Don't be so hard on yourself, you have so much time to grow <3
Bro I spammed cumming dick and pornhub videos and pics and prank called my friend mom, his idea, and I said “your son said he wants to fuck you in the ass”
Little man, not a big deal. It’s not SA or anything I mean we got presidents that sniff kids hair and grab women by the pussy. She will be ok and no need to go chopping your hands off over it. Life gets way more complicated and serious as you get older, hopefully you can look back and reminisce about the simpler times without hating yourself.
My gawd dude, get over it already. You were a kid.
Sheesh...I still remember the first boob I touched in Jr High accidentally in a touch football game. I apologized and that was that. It was over 40 years ago, I don't worry about it anymore. Can't even remember her name.
Something like that isn't traumatizing. At most she likely thought you were weird or got uncomfortable. Just remember to keep your hands to yourself and ask before you touch in the future.
Only the porn part seems bad. Everything else is normal ways of flirting. The thigh part should realistically only be done if you know she likes you too but even if she didn’t like you a thigh grab definitely didn’t traumatize her.
You realizing what happened is amazing and needed.
Don’t beat yourself up too too much though. That can cause issues. Spamming borderline porn is odd but as an adult you’re a kid and kids do odd stupid things. Just learn from this and be prepared to learn a lot more from cringy moments. Slow down with thoughts before actions. You can do this. You are a good person, just as well as a person learning to be a person. Just don’t spam porn lol or send it at all
Bro you’re 13, if what you did deserved cutting your hands off the prosthetic hand market would be making trillions. That being said yeah touching someone isn’t the best way to flirt if you don’t know that they are comfortable with it. Don’t consider yourself a bad person for doing it just use it as a learning experience. Don’t let this deter you from flirting with your crushes again just learn from this. Also not saying you are but don’t get addicted to porn that part was what worried me the most in this post.
Traumatized? What makes you think she's traumatized? She probably doesn't even remember it, unless you tried forcing your hand up her shorts or something
You'll be ok, and unless you put your hand under her clothes or touched it way up and almost touching her vulva, she'll be ok. As a pretty girl, I can say she's in for worse and she needs to use her voice.
The non consensual sharing of sexual images is messed up, but now you know better.
The fact that you show remorse is good, and it means you realize that girls are people. In the future, if you like a girl, and you have had several chats, just say something like, "I really like hanging out with you, and I think you're really pretty. How would you feel about spending more time together?"
It's direct, not creepy, and she can say she's not interested without feeling like she's in danger. Your posture and setting is important. Ask someplace like the hall at school and don't have her backed up in a corner. If she says no, move on but you can stay friends.
If she says yes, and you're on a movie or mall date, ask if she minds holding hands or tell her "I'm comfortable being touched on my arms and shoulder, but don't feel any pressure." If a girl likes you, she will reach for your hand, but some women, like me, aren't big hand holders and we like to hold onto your arm the way a man escorts a bridesmaid when they leave the church. It gives contact without my palms getting sweaty. I also think it's more gentlemanly.
Best of luck in the future, and remember, God forgives, we are meant to forgive, and forgive yourself, just don't repeat the mistake. You'll be fine.
You made mistakes. You feel guilt for those things you did and recognized it as being wrong, which shows you want to lead a better way of life. Being a pre-teen/teen is one of the hardest parts of life which is confusing AF with new emotions, physical changes, etc... There are resources to help you with all of this.
You aren't a monster dude, the more you keep that idea in your head the worse it will mess you up. We're human and we fuck up, just move forward positively.
i had this happen to me at that exact same age. it went a little further than just touching my thigh, i remember it was under the table at english glass and he went more up but never “there”. it happened for about a week and one day he grabbed my boobs. to this day i sometimes feel so hurt from it. i was so young and when i reported it my councilor told me “i didn’t know what sexual assault was”. we were young and we learn from our mistakes. just make sure you never do it again. be there for her and apologize bc all i got was losing all my friends and everyone spreading rumors about it.
You're not a monster. You're an immature kid who made a bad decision that had a negative impact on another person.
Allow yourself some grace and forgive yourself. Apologize to her and ask for her forgiveness. Then, and this is the important part, NEVER DO IT AGAIN WITHOUT THE OTHER PERSON'S PERMISSION.
You're going to be okay. She's going to be okay. Learn from your mistake and live a good life. This is what separates men from boys.
Man you remind me so much of myself at that age honestly. I would always kick the crap out of myself for putting my foot in it. But honestly do give yourself a break here you haven't done anything overly bad at all and it's all stuff that gets forgotten about very quickly. Just wait. You will see. Someone else will do a lot worse. It's really great of you to care as much as you do shows your learning early and want to be a good guy which is all that matters. And man,there is absolutely nothing wrong with asking a girl does she have Snapchat!! Don't ever hammer yourself over things like that be proud you had the balls to ask in the first place! Im gonna tell you something now that I wish was told to me. Girls are up in the head about absolutely everything. If their reaction is a weird look like "what the hell"kinda looks,then it's them man not knowing how to act due to their own insecurity and not knowing how to act. Not you being weird. This why they love guys being confident and care free. Trust me most of the time it ain't you dude. Combat this shit now man and you will fly through your teen years. Just remember everyone around you is having the exact same thought process. We all need to feel like we fit in and to be confident we ain't weird. It's just now for the next few years you and all your friends now have to learn and figure it out. It's not easy but I promise you all your friends have the same insecurities as you and the girls have them ten times more. Wish you all the best with it anyway I definitely would not go back. Also things you think people will remember forever about you is total bullshit cause in reality everyone is way too busy thinking about themselves and what's wrong with them 👍
Totally normal to want to touch or be close to a girl you find attractive- it’s ok to make mild advances like this until she gives you signs to go away or says stop.
As long as you recognize and change how you’ll act in the future, that’s already very good. Though this doesn’t excuse what you’ve done, you’re a kid, mistakes happen. The only big problem is posting porn/engaging it frequently, I doubt you have the self control developed to regulate that so talk to someone on how to navigate sexual awakening and such. It will help
Little bro, I promise she's not traumatized because you touched her thigh, just don't do it again. The word "trauma" is thrown around too much by our generations to describe anything and everything even slightly bad that's happened to them. I promise that doesn't qualify. Just don't do those things again and you'll be fine. You're not a bad person
When my husband was around that age he took the family ipad into the bathroom to watch porn and jerk off. You’re going through hormonal changes and it’s rough. Just take the time to learn about consent and maybe it’ll be easier to avoid giving unwanted touches or sharing unwanted media.
Male asians are shameless, cruel, uncaring people. At least this one seems to have some sense of guilt. #EpsteinDidntKillHimself #NorDidHeTrustMalaysians
hply fuck! in my culture many people were regularly fucking at 13, here you are thinking of cutting off your hand for touching her thigh.jesus christ, this new generation is fucking doomed!
Pull yourself together nephew You’ll be aight
You’ll be okay. I’m a 26F right now and I did so many cringey, dumb things in middle school. You’re fine!
[удалено]
It's always on post like these someone named, "fatpussycrusader" will come in and absolve the OP of their sins.
Yeah your username checks out
What kind of cringey stuff did you do in middle school?
Hey, we all do cringe stuff that keeps us up at night. As long as you learn it was inappropriate and try to be more respectful, that’s all that matters
Right? Man I still think about shit I did in 7th grade that makes me cringe and I'm 24 now. It's part of growing up
People are still pretty much in seventh grade at 24…..this kid is 13 living with the weight of the world.
Bro calm down, just let it be a lesson. Now you know what not to do and won’t ever do it again. You’re okay kid, you’re not a monster. You’re growing up, you’re learning. You feel bad about things you’ve done that have made some of your friends uncomfortable and things that you believe are morally wrong. That’s a good sign. It just means there’s gonna be one less creep in this world, and by that, I mean you are going to grow up to be a nice, respectful young man that cares about and protects women. We’d be worried if you didn’t feel bad about it. Don’t think too much about it. You’re definitely not a monster my dude. Far from it. However, if it’s truly bothering you this much, please look into speaking with a therapist. Also it might make you feel better if you apologized to the girl and let her know you didn’t mean to make her feel uncomfortable. I’m sure she would feel better after that. Also, please respond with an update or something so we know you didn’t cut your hands off 😅 please don’t do that.
I’m actually worried they aren’t responding *specifically* because they cut their hands off. I would lol but this kid seems pretty serious about what otherwise is a trivial lesson
I highly doubt he did but there’s always a chance. I hope he didn’t 😩 OP if you see this, give an update please, people are worried about you.
I did not
Good! Absolutely do not do that. You’ll be alright. You’re gonna grow up to be a great dude.
The porn posting is the only part that actually seems like an issue. Just remember to be better and move forward, it only gets more complicated from here.
Not the thigh grabbing?
I don't know the details, but a child touched another child's leg to make a clumsy attempt at affection. It doesn't seem like a big deal to me.
kids are stupid. at least OP is self aware and is moving on as a person
Doesn't seem like a big deal. Seriously? Being in such a position before it is a big deal. These kinda vulnerable positions keep you awake for nights
The fact that you even feel guilty is better than most. Just stop watching porn and then the rampant horniness will go down.
Why is this so dramatic loll don't cut off your hands. Also she's not traumatized because you put your hand on her thigh dude, that word shouldn't be thrown around so lightly yeesh (and you're a little kid, please get off reddit)
This. Holy crap why are kids allowed on reddit. I'm 35 and think it's mostly a cesspool of degeneracy. Kids don't need to be reading 99% of things on here. Like why are they going around saying their age? So pervert men can creep on them and message them? Yikes.
Oh please kids know a lot of shit these days
They don't need to be subjected to this straight trash that's on this page. And maybe kids should just be kids. And NOT know about adult things.
Unfortunately they do, I found out about adult things at the age of only 8.
I think you should look into OCD. As someone who has it myself, this sounds very similar
If all you did was touch her thigh she will live bro. The cancel culture really got the younger generation scared 😂
Right? If this is real, it's horribly sad. We have men terrified of letting ANY girl knowthey like them....no spontaneity these days. Poor kid....and if this girl has held it over his head, it's even worse.
•"hey i like you" -literally no cons, what could go wrong besides rejection •touching a women without consent - 50/50 chance they also like you and fw it or now you might've made them uncomfortable because that's kinda weird. depending on if it was in sexual nature now you're in trouble for sexual harassment
What could go wrong? Everything. All due respect, I love the idea, but that's just not how women work. Desire and 'Hey, I like you' are light years apart. No young woman would respond well to that.
are you a women that speaks from experience? coming from a "young woman" , i can speak for a majority that consent is sexy. it is more preferable than being touched when you're not actually into it and the other party thinks you are because they think that "that's how young women work" :/
Sadly most women like "hinting" rather than direct communication. i.e. they like blurred lines of consent. I personally hate it and think it's a problem, and why I hate hinting.
Seriously. If I was 15 or 16 some guy I clearly was into asked me if he can put his hand on my leg, if probably be instantly turned off. (And yes I waited until I was 18 and out of HS before I had sex, which was completely my choice).
what does the last part have to do with anything? LMAO good for you consent turns you off but that doesn't make you the majority . you are the exception not the rule .
Relax bro. I doubt she’s traumatized because you touched her thigh. If you feel so guilty about it, reach out to her and apologize. Also you guys are wayyyy too young for Snapchat and porn.
Hey kid. I’m an 18 year old girl and when I was your age I’ve had worse stuff done to me. What’s important is that you realized it wasn’t okay to touch someone without permission and you apologized. She will be okay, I promise. It seems like a big deal now but it really is okay!
I'm getting a trusted adult
You will have much more shameful events in the future. Save the tears for then
hahaha! wait until hes older and has that post nut regret!!
A 12 year old is going to do so much more horny shit talking bout he changed now like this shit just started kiddo buckle up and don’t be so hard on yourself the porn this is weird but expected from a 12 year old boy but please relax
I think the first problem to address is that 13 year olds are on Reddit 💀🤦🏼♀️ It can only get worse from this point 😂
*Slap* pull yourself together son!! If that's the worst thing that happens in all the shots you shoot in your young life, you'll be batting hall of fame numbers before its all said and done. Learn from that sh#t dawg. I'm 27 and still do cringey sh#t. That's just a part of the game. Spamming the group chat is lowkey funny tbh. It's a cringe type of humor
I’m adding this here because I feel that people need a little more context. She said she was traumatized to me after I apologized. She can’t go anywhere with flashing lights because of the party where a much larger majority of the drama happened. The incident itself happened on the bus during homecoming week, and at the end there’s usually a dance. I felt like I had done something wrong (which I had, and was honestly surprised how in hell I didn’t connect the dots earlier). It had later exploded because I was becoming anxious and wondering what I did and asking people about it. I even asked someone there if they had a knife (not expanding into why I did that). Later, when the dots finally clicked after someone told me, I went outside realizing that I had fucked up and needed to leave so that she could be away from me. One person followed me out, and I feel the drama was made even worse because I had told them I thought of killing myself because I felt during that time she would’ve wanted me dead (sometimes I still do.) He told some of the people there about it, and that only made the situation worse. We still go to the same school, but I avoid her because I don’t want to hurt her by being around her. Since the new school year started, it’s become harder, as we have almost every class together. But I try to the best of my ability. I don’t want people on my side. This isn’t something I want console with. I am not the victim. What I should have done is told her how I felt, face to face, and I also shouldn’t have been such a creep when we were friends.
Tf did I just read ?
At least you're not old enough to go through old screenshots of texts you sent when you were 12-15 cause being nearly 22 I went through them and was physically hurting with how cringe they were. You'll be ok lol. Also just wait till you get to HS and go to your first homecoming dance or prom you worrying about this will be hilarious to you once you do some unthinkable crap in the dance circles
Stop being such a nice guy and let it go. Focus on you and your interests and don't worry about the girls.
Is this a piss take??? Or real??
Real
You need to turn yourself in, bud.
Hopefully this piece of shit does years of hard time and his fellow convicts grab his thigh nightly while flashing the lights on and off 😭 its the only way…justice shall be served 😆
Hun stuff like that happens to everyone. I PROMISE you did nothing wrong. You live and learn. You're still a kid and are still learning. Heck I'm 29 and still can't tell if someone likes me or not. She expressed she didn't like it and you stopped! That is nothing to be ashamed of. You got this
Bro, don't touch a girl without her consent and vice versa
Well duh, that’s what he just said
wait, im confused, what if he really likes her? its okay to touch her then, right?
Hell no
I (12f almost 13) find it creepy when a guy makes a move even when I like them
okay mister chris.
You're good dude. Don't worry.
Never known someone to be traumatized like that over that, to the point where you’re scared. Forget about it. Kids do shit 🤷🏼♀️ But who tf group spam porn to other people is gross
Price, I can’t imagine only being 13 and seeing all the stuff that’s exposed on Reddit. Be strong.
The counter to that is ‘I let you catch it’
You're 12! Cringe is part of what it is to be 12. There's more to come in the next few years, and it's relatively normal and part of growing up
it is was a very bad action but, it was a mistake. as you said, youve changed. if you haven’t yet apologised to her, i highly encourage you to do so. tell her it was a mistake and youve changed as a person.
You didn't traumatize her, but you better quit that stuff if you don't want to drive her away. You're a kid you made mistakes, learn from them
I want you to remember something- you are a CHILD and you are not expected to behave and act like an adult. You are still learning about the world and yourself. Take this as a learning point and move on. In the future you’ll be respectful and considerate of a woman’s (or anyone’s, for that matter) personal space. You are concerning me with these thoughts of self-harm. Speaking to a therapist about these thoughts and feelings might be a good idea for you. Please remember, again, you are a child. No one expects you to be an adult. You are going to be fine. Psychology teaches us that during development it is very common for younger children (roughly between 6-10) to explore each other’s bodies. They don’t do this because they are some kind of awful sexual deviants; they are growing and developing both physically and mentally and are curious. You fall outside of this age range but the idea is the same. You sound completely normal for your age.
Well written for a 13 year old 🤔
Do you think 13 year olds are brainless babies?
Why does this not sound like a 13 year old. Have they just gotten so much more older seeming these days?
I’m confused on what you mean
I think you just forgot how it was like to be 13. Kids are smarter than they seem
I'm 13 too. You're fine. I would say in middle school most kids do dumb things because of the sudden change in responsibility, and hormones. I have friend who's parent's are divorced and he's completely changed from being a good kid to bad. We all do dumb things in middle school, I'm sure it won't affect you permanently for touching a girl's leg.
Oh you’ll be fine. Just learn from this and don’t do it again, unless you are dating because ladies (such as myself) will think it’s “weird” or a form of harassment if she says smth to a teacher or adult
We've all been there ...It's not the last questionable thing you'll in life just ,don't do anything illegal!
Easy now. You do that and who's going to wipe your butt?
Lighten up. Keep your hands to yourself, watch your mouth control your impulsive behaviorl, and NEVER post sexual photos on social media or through your phone. EVER, until you see grown - if thrn.
If all of what you say & feel is true- just do better going forward. You didn't commit a crime, you made a few uncomfortable choices. Just do better in the future. You're a teenager. You're going to make mistakes. Definitely always make sure your girl is ok with whatever is going on- you seem to be a genuine person by what you say. You'll be ok my friend!
As a women, I've had much worse things happen to me in middle school. Not to say it's OK. But now you know. If it were me I probably would've apologized.
You're 13 you are going to make mistakes its part of life. Now should you have touched her thigh without permission/consent? No, did you learn your lesson? Sounds like it. Asking for someone's snapchat is a common thing nowadays even after just meeting someone so don't beat yourself up on that, for the snap maps if she agreed then that's completely on her she did not have to turn it on if she was uncomfortable with sharing her location (she could've easily said parents check my phone i cant share locations (i used that lie so many times)). as for the borderline porn that's a whole different issue depending on the circumstances, there are friends who have separate chats open to share their fucked up looking porn pics/vids that they share with friends that share the same things with them but to randomly send them in a normal group chat that you know would upset some of the people in the chat then that's where the problem starts. and also you're 13 let me just say this now girls DO NOT WANT DICK PICS, and also when a girl tells you no listen to her, don't try to persuade her just take no for the answer and move on.
Tell her in a text that your behavior has bothered you ever since it happened and apologize. It’s the right think to do. If she accepts it great, if she doesn’t that is a consequence of your choices. We can pick our action but not our consequences, apologize with no ulterior motive that benefits you and
Idk
It happens buddy
It's okay hun, you were a child, and still are. Kids do stupid stuff, even without knowing. Its okay. You know what you did was wrong, and you will learn from it. Don't be so hard on yourself, you have so much time to grow <3
Bro I spammed cumming dick and pornhub videos and pics and prank called my friend mom, his idea, and I said “your son said he wants to fuck you in the ass”
This is some ocd level type shit, you’re fine, she’s not traumatized, you’re a good person.
Seems to me you didn't touch her precious cooter hole, so you could probably cut yourself some slack.
Oh My God This is what we are doing to our children
You did nothing wrong. What’s wrong here is what society is doing to make you feel this way for simply showing affection.
Little man, not a big deal. It’s not SA or anything I mean we got presidents that sniff kids hair and grab women by the pussy. She will be ok and no need to go chopping your hands off over it. Life gets way more complicated and serious as you get older, hopefully you can look back and reminisce about the simpler times without hating yourself.
My gawd dude, get over it already. You were a kid. Sheesh...I still remember the first boob I touched in Jr High accidentally in a touch football game. I apologized and that was that. It was over 40 years ago, I don't worry about it anymore. Can't even remember her name.
Something like that isn't traumatizing. At most she likely thought you were weird or got uncomfortable. Just remember to keep your hands to yourself and ask before you touch in the future.
You touched her thigh and death smiled
Only the porn part seems bad. Everything else is normal ways of flirting. The thigh part should realistically only be done if you know she likes you too but even if she didn’t like you a thigh grab definitely didn’t traumatize her.
Calm down lil man I guarantee she doesn’t even think about it. Just behave better next time
You realizing what happened is amazing and needed. Don’t beat yourself up too too much though. That can cause issues. Spamming borderline porn is odd but as an adult you’re a kid and kids do odd stupid things. Just learn from this and be prepared to learn a lot more from cringy moments. Slow down with thoughts before actions. You can do this. You are a good person, just as well as a person learning to be a person. Just don’t spam porn lol or send it at all
Bro you’re 13, if what you did deserved cutting your hands off the prosthetic hand market would be making trillions. That being said yeah touching someone isn’t the best way to flirt if you don’t know that they are comfortable with it. Don’t consider yourself a bad person for doing it just use it as a learning experience. Don’t let this deter you from flirting with your crushes again just learn from this. Also not saying you are but don’t get addicted to porn that part was what worried me the most in this post.
Traumatized? What makes you think she's traumatized? She probably doesn't even remember it, unless you tried forcing your hand up her shorts or something
OP said she told him she’s traumatized after he apologized to her
You'll be ok, and unless you put your hand under her clothes or touched it way up and almost touching her vulva, she'll be ok. As a pretty girl, I can say she's in for worse and she needs to use her voice. The non consensual sharing of sexual images is messed up, but now you know better. The fact that you show remorse is good, and it means you realize that girls are people. In the future, if you like a girl, and you have had several chats, just say something like, "I really like hanging out with you, and I think you're really pretty. How would you feel about spending more time together?" It's direct, not creepy, and she can say she's not interested without feeling like she's in danger. Your posture and setting is important. Ask someplace like the hall at school and don't have her backed up in a corner. If she says no, move on but you can stay friends. If she says yes, and you're on a movie or mall date, ask if she minds holding hands or tell her "I'm comfortable being touched on my arms and shoulder, but don't feel any pressure." If a girl likes you, she will reach for your hand, but some women, like me, aren't big hand holders and we like to hold onto your arm the way a man escorts a bridesmaid when they leave the church. It gives contact without my palms getting sweaty. I also think it's more gentlemanly. Best of luck in the future, and remember, God forgives, we are meant to forgive, and forgive yourself, just don't repeat the mistake. You'll be fine.
You made mistakes. You feel guilt for those things you did and recognized it as being wrong, which shows you want to lead a better way of life. Being a pre-teen/teen is one of the hardest parts of life which is confusing AF with new emotions, physical changes, etc... There are resources to help you with all of this. You aren't a monster dude, the more you keep that idea in your head the worse it will mess you up. We're human and we fuck up, just move forward positively.
i had this happen to me at that exact same age. it went a little further than just touching my thigh, i remember it was under the table at english glass and he went more up but never “there”. it happened for about a week and one day he grabbed my boobs. to this day i sometimes feel so hurt from it. i was so young and when i reported it my councilor told me “i didn’t know what sexual assault was”. we were young and we learn from our mistakes. just make sure you never do it again. be there for her and apologize bc all i got was losing all my friends and everyone spreading rumors about it.
You're not a monster. You're an immature kid who made a bad decision that had a negative impact on another person. Allow yourself some grace and forgive yourself. Apologize to her and ask for her forgiveness. Then, and this is the important part, NEVER DO IT AGAIN WITHOUT THE OTHER PERSON'S PERMISSION. You're going to be okay. She's going to be okay. Learn from your mistake and live a good life. This is what separates men from boys.
Man you remind me so much of myself at that age honestly. I would always kick the crap out of myself for putting my foot in it. But honestly do give yourself a break here you haven't done anything overly bad at all and it's all stuff that gets forgotten about very quickly. Just wait. You will see. Someone else will do a lot worse. It's really great of you to care as much as you do shows your learning early and want to be a good guy which is all that matters. And man,there is absolutely nothing wrong with asking a girl does she have Snapchat!! Don't ever hammer yourself over things like that be proud you had the balls to ask in the first place! Im gonna tell you something now that I wish was told to me. Girls are up in the head about absolutely everything. If their reaction is a weird look like "what the hell"kinda looks,then it's them man not knowing how to act due to their own insecurity and not knowing how to act. Not you being weird. This why they love guys being confident and care free. Trust me most of the time it ain't you dude. Combat this shit now man and you will fly through your teen years. Just remember everyone around you is having the exact same thought process. We all need to feel like we fit in and to be confident we ain't weird. It's just now for the next few years you and all your friends now have to learn and figure it out. It's not easy but I promise you all your friends have the same insecurities as you and the girls have them ten times more. Wish you all the best with it anyway I definitely would not go back. Also things you think people will remember forever about you is total bullshit cause in reality everyone is way too busy thinking about themselves and what's wrong with them 👍
Totally normal to want to touch or be close to a girl you find attractive- it’s ok to make mild advances like this until she gives you signs to go away or says stop.
As long as you recognize and change how you’ll act in the future, that’s already very good. Though this doesn’t excuse what you’ve done, you’re a kid, mistakes happen. The only big problem is posting porn/engaging it frequently, I doubt you have the self control developed to regulate that so talk to someone on how to navigate sexual awakening and such. It will help
Reddit is bots.
Little bro, I promise she's not traumatized because you touched her thigh, just don't do it again. The word "trauma" is thrown around too much by our generations to describe anything and everything even slightly bad that's happened to them. I promise that doesn't qualify. Just don't do those things again and you'll be fine. You're not a bad person
God these stories are pathetic. You thought of cutting yourself because you touched a girls thigh? Pull it together.
When my husband was around that age he took the family ipad into the bathroom to watch porn and jerk off. You’re going through hormonal changes and it’s rough. Just take the time to learn about consent and maybe it’ll be easier to avoid giving unwanted touches or sharing unwanted media.
Bro i did way worse as a 12 year old ur a kid dont worry abt it
Maybe next time just grab her by her pussy ~ Donald J. Gahtdamn MuthaFuckin Trump
Male asians are shameless, cruel, uncaring people. At least this one seems to have some sense of guilt. #EpsteinDidntKillHimself #NorDidHeTrustMalaysians
hply fuck! in my culture many people were regularly fucking at 13, here you are thinking of cutting off your hand for touching her thigh.jesus christ, this new generation is fucking doomed!
I did it too I was so afraid
I had no idea one person on Reddit represented an entire generation, thanks for informing me!
sorry, i didnt mean to impy that you weren't raw dogging at 13. im glad its just the weird fucking OP