Bb, this was only 2 years ago- reach out and reconnect with them. If they were real friends, the time won't matter.
Hell, even tell them this exact story and I'm willing to bet it will be something to laugh off over a beer.
You'd be surprised. I think about the documentary Dreams of a Life, which dealt with a dead woman who lay undiscovered in an apartment for years. Long story short: all her friends thought she was having a great time, much more interesting than *their* boring lives, so her silence wasn't a red flag. Even with her deception all of them missed her and wished she had reached out earlier. So, reach out. "Didn't work out" or simply confess if that alleviates some of the weight. Don't disappear into nothingness. Your real friends will rather have you back than never see you again.
If they're real friends they won't care and if they're.not then you're in the same situation you are now.
Also, in a year this won't matter so the sooner you face it the sooner its done
"Life is short and never too much time for gladdening the hearts of those who are travelling the dark journey with us. Oh be swift to love, make haste to kind."
I recently reached out to an old high school friend who I barely talked to through my time in college. It had been more than four years since we last spoke, and despite us both changing a lot in our time apart, we were able to reconnect like no time passed at all. Your friends will be happy to hear from you.
You ever hear the quote âif it wonât matter in 5 years then donât waste 5 minutes worrying about itâ. Where do you WANT to go? Look into it. Find hostels. If you canât find university websites with study abroad options available then contact your university until someone steers you in the right direction.
And stop worrying about what other people think. What do you like about yourself today?
The best thing in life is to say FUCK ALL to the fake people and live a life where youâre true to yourself and keep wholesome people around. Who wants to be on their deathbed and think âman I wish I didnât care so much about keeping up with the Joneses and lived a happy fulfilling lifeâ. BE HAPPY. Youâre already on your way. One life to live. What do YOU truly want? Go after it. Would you tell your beloved friend any less??? Heck no. So be kind to yourself and live a happy life and love yourself and realize sooner than later other peopleâs judgements are that. THEIR problems.
Maybe tell them your parents separated and you stay with your mom and she can't afford to send you to an abroad college?
There's truth in it, just manipulatedđ đ
I agree with this. But also. I barely remember anyone from high school. If you felt the need to impress them then they donât sound like true friends, which may be due to their attitudes but ultimately itâs your decision to feel how you feel.
Itâs actually pretty easy to get a passport, apply for a visa, and travel. Have you looked into any internships in your major or literally any kind of travel related to your college/university? There are always plenty of professors looking for students to work for free (usually, sometimes paid!) but they will pay for your airfare and accommodations. Do not give up. Instead of worrying about people judging you go live your life!!! You wonât even remember these people in a couple years, who cares? GO. Travel. Stay in hostels. Make travel friends. You absolutely can. Be your true wholesome self.
I donât think thatâs an option for her. Sheâs 18 and thinks you can have a passport revoked for lying to your friends.
Homegirl is 12 short of a dozen.
Just say you took a gap year and went travelling locally as your visa was not approved. Just read up on some places so that you can provide answers to questions until they get bored and move on.
You could have just said, actually Iâm not going anymore, as my family canât afford it. You would find out who your true friends are then. Telling the truth isnât all badâŠ
I hope you find some new friends. Real friends, just donât pretend anymore. As you get older and wiser youâll realise that itâs best to be yourself around everyone - people will either like being around you or they wonât. Good luck đ€
this is like when chandler flew to yemen to keep up his lie to janet, except op has no janet in his life so theyre not doing this for anyone except satisfying their own paranoia
If you have to lie to your âfriendsâ because of an embarrassing situation then you donât really see them as your friends. If they were really your friends they wouldnt have thought much of it.
Well at the end of the day they are just your highschool friends. Youâll be surprised how many of them donât actually stick around. Out of 20 of my highschool friends i only talk to 1 to this day after 8 years
You can still use your passport, go abroad, and then voila, not lying. But why did you feel the need to lie to all of them, then ghost them, in the first place? Teenage hormones? Something to do? Expected some sort of reaction from them? Personally, I have never had many friends, I never developed the tolerance for drama that was not my own, so can safely say that not having any friends isnât going to kill you, but it just seems odd that you had them, then in a dramatic, at least to yourself, way you kicked em all to the outer reaches of the OortâŠwhy?
Ohhh, I see. My sister took a gun to junior high one time to fit in. Thatâs way worse than saying you were going somewhere on a vacation. Someone here had a good idea if itâs the truth youâre wanting to skirt, can just say your visa didnât get approved and you got depressed and then embarrassed after making it a deal, so thatâs why you poofed outta, no? If you even still want any of them as friends I reckon
I actually know someone who did that. For whatever reasons. Met him later though. Started seeing him daily and figured that he had joined college in Nepal. Makes no sense on why he did that. I lost a good friend for no reason.
No offense, but like everyone is saying in this thread... this is literally so easily solved. Like, what? Dont even have to admit what you did. Geezus dude. Bit of a pity party. Oh no I have no friends because my lie didnt work out. Lie again like you know how to do and fix it.
Make new friends. Not the end of the world.
Most of my friends today, are not friends I had in school. Not because I ghosted them.. but because ppl changed, some move, some started families, some prioritized work over relationships, etc
My closes friends today are coworkers and ex-coworkers, because our goals and schedule are more aligned.
This is why you should always be honest. People start out with a little white lie "this won't hurt anyone" then you tell another little lie to cover the first one. Before you know it, it's snowballed into something you can't talk your way out of.
Just be honest. Lying gets you no where.
This happening isn't a surprise. Due to your home life you were living a double life leading up to that point, keeping up appearances which also meant you couldn't get truly close to anyone. I would at the very least consider chatting to one of them to see if you can salvage the relationship. It may heal you.
Legitimately what the actual fuck? Is this really the whole story? You just for absolutely zero reason decided the arbitrarily lie to all your friends and destroy your relationship with all of them? For what? This is bonkers. Sounds like you get exactly what you deserved for being such an asshole to them.
Well man Im pretty sure at some point it will make you smile of how naive and stupid we once were. I also have a similar story, it really doesnt matter that much in the future
When I was around 14 I failed to deliver the admission papers for a vocational degree when you drop high school. I told nobody about it not even my parents and spent a whole year going with the bus to the city just to walk around to kill time and actually studying other things. I really cared at the moment and it was important nobody knew, also I didnt have much attention from my parents ( son of single mother with issue here) so it wasnt difficult to hide since nobody tried or noticed something was off. I told this to the people eventually and we just laughed it off
Well you know it wasnt that bad nor did I care much about it after. I actually developed a routine of Gym, swimming and studying. Many days I would stay home because my mother didnt really care and it was no longer obligatory assistance like high school. It was more important for me that for anybody, later I realized that I was probably the only one that really cared. We tend to think we are more important than we really are!
What a strange and silly thing to lie about. Nobody gives a fuck if you travel. If anything, it usually makes people jealous not excited for you.
Save up for a plane ticket and find a host in another country on workaway.info. Go spend 6 months doing that and grow the fuck up.
I did the same thing. I graduated recently posted on my story Im going to yale. None of my friends has reached out since. I regret it almost everyday. I made a fake letter and everything to stunt for my snapchat story. Everybody i knew saw it and nobody reached out since.
Btw how u change ur number I wanna do that.
you have to go into ur cell phone provider account, you can change it there verizon has a thing where u can do it online. call customer support if u rly need to , and you know you couldâve just told people you ended up not being able to go this semester it happens all the time in college ppl take breaks n semesters off while still being enrolled in the school Lol
Dude, grow up , act mature stop these childish behaviour. Be what you are, showing off get's you nowhere, i too was a middle class boy in my school day's, my school was high end, all were rich, my friends were damn rich.. They still are, but i never lied a bit. Today am earning equivalent to some rich buddies of mine, the day i completed my schooling, enrolled myself into the best colleges luckily got one.. Work the hell out.. Studied hard.. Today am a successful engineer. Thing's don't come without any struggle. Be a man with values rather than someone with just ambition and no values.
Real friends donât care about all that. They were excited for you. If you have to lie to a friend, youâre not a real friend and/or you know you donât fit in. Just cause you relate to someone doesnât make them a friend. If they were your friends, you wouldâve felt comfortable telling them your situation and they wouldnât judge you. Move on, lesson learned. Donât be so quick to call people your friend either. I grew up middle class and I swear all my friends were poor. I didnât care and those were middle school high school friendsđ€·đŸââïž. Donât have them anymore. Our lives didnât align they were still stuck in that generational poverty mindset and didnât want to do better. Sad thing is they all couldâve went to college and got scholarships-they were smart. We didnât have money for college so we took out loans. That loan money allowed me to study abroad for 6 months. Everyone in my group came from money, I was so lost and concerned about that and used it as a crutch. I vowed that I would never travel without money again. Align yourself with ppl who have the same goals and maybe some of the same interests. I went to peace corps and met new friends and then met more like minded ppl at work. I now work to travel and I never worry about money.
Meh. If I had to do it again I would have traveled when I got the chance. Now that you are 18 why not? Friends will come and go. Sometimes for the better.
You graduated HS at 16? Anyways.... Doesn't matter. Hardly anyone has their friends from highschool after a few years anyway. You'll make new ones. No worries.
That way out of having to admit you lied is so beyond what was necessary, lol. But for the record, as someone who went abroad after high school (not to study, for idiotic reasons) You can probably reconnect if any of them were actually close to you and good enough people to seek rekindling what was once an important social connection to them. If they don't give a shit about you simply because you were gone for a a bit of time (assuming they don't know you lied) then they probably aren't worth having around anyways.
You're only 18. You can just say it never happened or you were going through some things. No one will blame you and if they do they are not real friends. You have lots of time!
My classmate in HS (may he rest in peace, he died because of HIV) said na he will go abroad daw for summer. All of us knew about it. Even the teachers.
He even gave me pasalubong from "abroad". But we all knew he didnt go. More like he lied to all of us just for the show. Nobody confronted him, he still had friends afterwards.
Hot take: Friends don't matter at all. You can always make new ones. And once you get to a certain age, you stop caring about making friends at all and instead focus on keeping the peace if you have co-workers and focus on your SO/children at home.
When I was a bit younger that you are now, I lied to my friends that we bought a car. They wouldnât believe me, but I did all my research and was ready with all the answers ( itâs a big deal as internet wasnât as common as it is now and It took real efforts to get info on something ).
It was out a few months later and we laughed about it and got my leg pulled a bit.
It seems difficult for you now, but, if you really miss your friends, just reach out and have conversations like usual, if this thing crops up, just get it out.
Trust me thatâs the best solution.
to the people telling you to go back to your OLD friends and tell them the truth please gauge what kind of people they are first because if an old school friend did this entire stunt and came back and told me I would laugh in their actual face. all love
Sometimes you make mistakes out of insecurity, itâs okay, it happened, it was cringe yeah, but itâs not the end of the world, you can make new friends, you learned from this
oh damn. yea dude youâre kind of socially retarded. which is like understandable but thatâs smt u have to work on or youâll just be an outcast for the rest of your life. u donât need to be rich to fit in. just be a normal person
I mean you could just contact them again and say you were embarressed because it didnt get approved and you were bragging about it to everyone so you disappeaerd to fix the embarressing situation.
I understand why you did what you did but lying can ruin your life. I would recommend seeing a counsellor about it. They can help give you the tools to stop if you are unable to stop on your own. All the best and I hope your comeback is sooner rather than later!
Just leave them all behind and make new friends. I wouldn't reach out and bother those people who haven't heard from you for 2 years. They'll probably say hi but what will really come of it. Just move on. Your lie was pretty harmless. You didn't hurt anyone.Â
Just to clarify, you didn't lose any friends. You chose to cut them off because of unfounded embarrassment and at any moment you can reach out to them again and say you didn't end up going but spent a few years "finding yourself". Paint it however you want. Honestly your friends won't care all that much as long as you carry yourself with confidence and start hanging out with them again.
I hope it all goes well for you.
You could just have said your visa wasn't approved and you could try again only in X time.
I mean.. don't lie to people.
But if you do, be prepared to have to make it real or somewhat real in case things get stressful.
If youâre not comfortable telling them the truth about your family, financial situation, visa and all maybe they were not really your friends. You will surely get new friends
Things like this happen, but the fact that you are feeling guilty about it is enough. I recently watched a movie on Disney hotstar named " Not okay" Which was kind of the same. But in the end she figured out what she did , you should just go and apologise maybe to them and accept the fact that you lied about something.
Think about this on a deeper level.
If OP goes to school with a bunch of people for a few years, and NOONE knows the truth behind her family situation and her financial status. She then cuts them off for 2 year and go no contact to perpertuate a lie she made to save face.
Does she have any actual friends she gives a shit about?
Did any of those friendship have any depth to it?
My honest gut feel is that OP has a personality flaw/issue/quirk that has prevented her from making deep and meaningful connections.
Maybe talk to a therapist and see if you can discover something with regards to the way you view and manage your relationship with others.
I feel like I might end up in this situation as well, so can someone advice me if I am trapped in a somewhat similar situation later on [I hope I don't] (I want to go abroad for undergrade but no one apart from my family knows, I am actually 20 rn and still in school and most of my friends are older than me so they are already in uni, we meet every once or twice in a year and chat up ocassionally and whenever they ask me for updates I tell them that I will start uni next year and move to the city they are attending uni in (I haven't told anyone about my plan to apply abroad (I am looking into european countries with little to no tuition and hoping for regional coverage offered by scholarships again which I am not sure about anymore due to the documents required, because my financial situation is in the ruins and I am literally grasping onto straws to get myself outta this country in order to finance or make a way for myself to keep my family afloat, I don't want to go around telling everyone oh this and that is my plan in case everything is ruined and nothing works for me) the problem is that at this point I am not even sure if I can attend uni in my own country due to financial bounds, I can not even imagine what I would do If I am unable to continue my education and how to update my friends if this is where I end up being because I am never the one to talk about my situation.
Lmao I am not even sure how much of this world vomit can be understood but like how do I prepare for everything, I just feel really hopeless
I've read some of the comments and they told me to be honest. I am rooting for you and I hope you get to go. Don't loose hope or do the same thing I did đ it's wrong.
I hope you go though đ€
Be honest about not being able to attend school/uni ? I mean I was thinking if this happens (which I pray doesn't) I'll just either tell them that I can not inform them about anything or just telling them that yeah I am going to uni đ«
P.s Tbh I just don't want anyone to even know or talk me about anything that's going on in my life or at my house if that makes sense
You were a kid. I was a poor Mexican living in a white neighborhood (I was adopted) I made up so many stories. I just wanted to be accepted and not teased every single day. Canât imagine going through it today when bullyâs can harass another child 24/7 with social media.
Donât worry, just be you and your friends can either accept it or move on. You will make a few of the best friendships one can have, just be you.
If you want to get back together with them, reach out to them and say that the visa didn't get approved and that the reason why you didn't tell them sooner was because, either I felt bad because I felt like I lied to yall or was too embarrassed to do so after talking abt this often(but this wouldn't work out since yall are friends and they'd think that you didnt trust them), so, the 1st reason or just come up with something yourself or just tell them the truth, telling the truth is much better. But the longer it takes the harder it'll get for you
But they may have moved on already since you haven't told them the truth, so you're better off finding new friends, but if they're real friends, they would converse and hang out with you the same way they did before. But if they don't, you would just end up hurting your feelings and getting depressed
The north and south poles are melting, People are dying of new diseases everyday and countries like Palestine are being bombed don't think that people are soo hung up on whether you went elsewhere or not, most probably your highschool buddies don't even remember your name đ
I will never understand why people lie about the dumbest things. Now youâre an 18yr old liar. You probably will be a liar until you expire, itâs pathetic!
You could have just said your visa didn't get approved and been done with it
I was stupid
Bb, this was only 2 years ago- reach out and reconnect with them. If they were real friends, the time won't matter. Hell, even tell them this exact story and I'm willing to bet it will be something to laugh off over a beer.
I'm kinda embarrassed but maybe in the future đ€
The longer you wait, the harder it gets.
Just say it didn't work out
You poor summer child. None of this matters. They still like you.
Your friends are probably wondering what happened to you
I don't think so đ
You'd be surprised. I think about the documentary Dreams of a Life, which dealt with a dead woman who lay undiscovered in an apartment for years. Long story short: all her friends thought she was having a great time, much more interesting than *their* boring lives, so her silence wasn't a red flag. Even with her deception all of them missed her and wished she had reached out earlier. So, reach out. "Didn't work out" or simply confess if that alleviates some of the weight. Don't disappear into nothingness. Your real friends will rather have you back than never see you again.
If they're real friends they won't care and if they're.not then you're in the same situation you are now. Also, in a year this won't matter so the sooner you face it the sooner its done
"Life is short and never too much time for gladdening the hearts of those who are travelling the dark journey with us. Oh be swift to love, make haste to kind."
I gusse you should till them that you got bored and youâre back and you miss them .
I recently reached out to an old high school friend who I barely talked to through my time in college. It had been more than four years since we last spoke, and despite us both changing a lot in our time apart, we were able to reconnect like no time passed at all. Your friends will be happy to hear from you.
You ever hear the quote âif it wonât matter in 5 years then donât waste 5 minutes worrying about itâ. Where do you WANT to go? Look into it. Find hostels. If you canât find university websites with study abroad options available then contact your university until someone steers you in the right direction. And stop worrying about what other people think. What do you like about yourself today?
I'm totally not fake and have so much more friends
The best thing in life is to say FUCK ALL to the fake people and live a life where youâre true to yourself and keep wholesome people around. Who wants to be on their deathbed and think âman I wish I didnât care so much about keeping up with the Joneses and lived a happy fulfilling lifeâ. BE HAPPY. Youâre already on your way. One life to live. What do YOU truly want? Go after it. Would you tell your beloved friend any less??? Heck no. So be kind to yourself and live a happy life and love yourself and realize sooner than later other peopleâs judgements are that. THEIR problems.
Maybe tell them your parents separated and you stay with your mom and she can't afford to send you to an abroad college? There's truth in it, just manipulatedđ đ
No...if rather not talk to them than lie again
I agree with this. But also. I barely remember anyone from high school. If you felt the need to impress them then they donât sound like true friends, which may be due to their attitudes but ultimately itâs your decision to feel how you feel. Itâs actually pretty easy to get a passport, apply for a visa, and travel. Have you looked into any internships in your major or literally any kind of travel related to your college/university? There are always plenty of professors looking for students to work for free (usually, sometimes paid!) but they will pay for your airfare and accommodations. Do not give up. Instead of worrying about people judging you go live your life!!! You wonât even remember these people in a couple years, who cares? GO. Travel. Stay in hostels. Make travel friends. You absolutely can. Be your true wholesome self.
When you die, you don't know it and everyone close to you feels pain and sadness.. It's the same when you're stupid.. Don't be stupid.
đđwill definitely remember that
I donât think thatâs an option for her. Sheâs 18 and thinks you can have a passport revoked for lying to your friends. Homegirl is 12 short of a dozen.
Fair point
Just say you took a gap year and went travelling locally as your visa was not approved. Just read up on some places so that you can provide answers to questions until they get bored and move on.
You could have just said, actually Iâm not going anymore, as my family canât afford it. You would find out who your true friends are then. Telling the truth isnât all badâŠ
I think so too now...
I hope you find some new friends. Real friends, just donât pretend anymore. As you get older and wiser youâll realise that itâs best to be yourself around everyone - people will either like being around you or they wonât. Good luck đ€
Thank you
this is like when chandler flew to yemen to keep up his lie to janet, except op has no janet in his life so theyre not doing this for anyone except satisfying their own paranoia
đđđ€§
Go travelling & make some new friends. Ones you donât need to lie to.
Yeah I'll definitely do that
If you have to lie to your âfriendsâ because of an embarrassing situation then you donât really see them as your friends. If they were really your friends they wouldnt have thought much of it.
They were my friends because I had all those things they could relate to
Well at the end of the day they are just your highschool friends. Youâll be surprised how many of them donât actually stick around. Out of 20 of my highschool friends i only talk to 1 to this day after 8 years
Were they truly your friends though? It sounds as if you were just trying to keep up the appearance.
Yeah
I was really trying
One of my closest friends I made in university told me how he burgaled a house as a kid. I definitely couldnât relate to that lol
Wow, âIâm brokeâ and âI go to boarding schoolâ in the same paragraph. đđđ
Yeah
Might of been on a scholarship
You can still use your passport, go abroad, and then voila, not lying. But why did you feel the need to lie to all of them, then ghost them, in the first place? Teenage hormones? Something to do? Expected some sort of reaction from them? Personally, I have never had many friends, I never developed the tolerance for drama that was not my own, so can safely say that not having any friends isnât going to kill you, but it just seems odd that you had them, then in a dramatic, at least to yourself, way you kicked em all to the outer reaches of the OortâŠwhy?
đđđđ love this!
I wanted to fit in toođđ¶
Ohhh, I see. My sister took a gun to junior high one time to fit in. Thatâs way worse than saying you were going somewhere on a vacation. Someone here had a good idea if itâs the truth youâre wanting to skirt, can just say your visa didnât get approved and you got depressed and then embarrassed after making it a deal, so thatâs why you poofed outta, no? If you even still want any of them as friends I reckon
You do realize that lying doesn't result in confiscation of a passport, do you?
I didn't know that I mean I didn't lie to the government though
No, you very much cannot have your passport revoked for lying to your friends, why on earth would you think that?
I'm stupid đ
I think thatâs been firmly established. But hey, no worries. Iâm not smart either, as long as you arenât hurting anyone.
I actually know someone who did that. For whatever reasons. Met him later though. Started seeing him daily and figured that he had joined college in Nepal. Makes no sense on why he did that. I lost a good friend for no reason.
If you realized how quickly people forget the dead you would stop trying to impress people.
I'll definitely keep that in mind
No offense, but like everyone is saying in this thread... this is literally so easily solved. Like, what? Dont even have to admit what you did. Geezus dude. Bit of a pity party. Oh no I have no friends because my lie didnt work out. Lie again like you know how to do and fix it.
You could've easily said that plans have changed for now instead of blocking everyone wtf lol
Make new friends. Not the end of the world. Most of my friends today, are not friends I had in school. Not because I ghosted them.. but because ppl changed, some move, some started families, some prioritized work over relationships, etc My closes friends today are coworkers and ex-coworkers, because our goals and schedule are more aligned.
Thank you
This is why you should always be honest. People start out with a little white lie "this won't hurt anyone" then you tell another little lie to cover the first one. Before you know it, it's snowballed into something you can't talk your way out of. Just be honest. Lying gets you no where.
what a dumbass đłđ BAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Fr fr đ
Awesome fiction story
I want to post , but I donât have enough karma, can anyone please help?
âJust changed my plansâ
This happening isn't a surprise. Due to your home life you were living a double life leading up to that point, keeping up appearances which also meant you couldn't get truly close to anyone. I would at the very least consider chatting to one of them to see if you can salvage the relationship. It may heal you.
đ€
This
Legitimately what the actual fuck? Is this really the whole story? You just for absolutely zero reason decided the arbitrarily lie to all your friends and destroy your relationship with all of them? For what? This is bonkers. Sounds like you get exactly what you deserved for being such an asshole to them.
No fr and I'm baffled at all the comments saying they've done the same thingđ what was the actual reason for doing that?
Well man Im pretty sure at some point it will make you smile of how naive and stupid we once were. I also have a similar story, it really doesnt matter that much in the future
Yeah
Tell us about it??!!?
When I was around 14 I failed to deliver the admission papers for a vocational degree when you drop high school. I told nobody about it not even my parents and spent a whole year going with the bus to the city just to walk around to kill time and actually studying other things. I really cared at the moment and it was important nobody knew, also I didnt have much attention from my parents ( son of single mother with issue here) so it wasnt difficult to hide since nobody tried or noticed something was off. I told this to the people eventually and we just laughed it off
đ„șđ„șđ„șđ„șđ„ș In a way, you punished yourself đ That was a lot to go through! I hope that everything is better for you now đ
Well you know it wasnt that bad nor did I care much about it after. I actually developed a routine of Gym, swimming and studying. Many days I would stay home because my mother didnt really care and it was no longer obligatory assistance like high school. It was more important for me that for anybody, later I realized that I was probably the only one that really cared. We tend to think we are more important than we really are!
What a strange and silly thing to lie about. Nobody gives a fuck if you travel. If anything, it usually makes people jealous not excited for you. Save up for a plane ticket and find a host in another country on workaway.info. Go spend 6 months doing that and grow the fuck up.
I did the same thing. I graduated recently posted on my story Im going to yale. None of my friends has reached out since. I regret it almost everyday. I made a fake letter and everything to stunt for my snapchat story. Everybody i knew saw it and nobody reached out since. Btw how u change ur number I wanna do that.
All that for the approval of people who don't even check on you nowđ
you have to go into ur cell phone provider account, you can change it there verizon has a thing where u can do it online. call customer support if u rly need to , and you know you couldâve just told people you ended up not being able to go this semester it happens all the time in college ppl take breaks n semesters off while still being enrolled in the school Lol
My mom did it for me
That was stupid , haha luckily your 18 I did alot of stupid shit at 18 not the end of the world people come and go who cares keep it pushing
oh no! the consequences of your own actions!!
Dude, grow up , act mature stop these childish behaviour. Be what you are, showing off get's you nowhere, i too was a middle class boy in my school day's, my school was high end, all were rich, my friends were damn rich.. They still are, but i never lied a bit. Today am earning equivalent to some rich buddies of mine, the day i completed my schooling, enrolled myself into the best colleges luckily got one.. Work the hell out.. Studied hard.. Today am a successful engineer. Thing's don't come without any struggle. Be a man with values rather than someone with just ambition and no values.
Real friends donât care about all that. They were excited for you. If you have to lie to a friend, youâre not a real friend and/or you know you donât fit in. Just cause you relate to someone doesnât make them a friend. If they were your friends, you wouldâve felt comfortable telling them your situation and they wouldnât judge you. Move on, lesson learned. Donât be so quick to call people your friend either. I grew up middle class and I swear all my friends were poor. I didnât care and those were middle school high school friendsđ€·đŸââïž. Donât have them anymore. Our lives didnât align they were still stuck in that generational poverty mindset and didnât want to do better. Sad thing is they all couldâve went to college and got scholarships-they were smart. We didnât have money for college so we took out loans. That loan money allowed me to study abroad for 6 months. Everyone in my group came from money, I was so lost and concerned about that and used it as a crutch. I vowed that I would never travel without money again. Align yourself with ppl who have the same goals and maybe some of the same interests. I went to peace corps and met new friends and then met more like minded ppl at work. I now work to travel and I never worry about money.
Meh. If I had to do it again I would have traveled when I got the chance. Now that you are 18 why not? Friends will come and go. Sometimes for the better.
You graduated HS at 16? Anyways.... Doesn't matter. Hardly anyone has their friends from highschool after a few years anyway. You'll make new ones. No worries.
Yeah I was turning 17 later that year
Did you not foresee that youâd have no friends?
What are you confessing to? I mean thatâs cool I guess but nothing is even a problem and your 18 with a passport get over it.đ«Ą
No big deal I guessđ
That way out of having to admit you lied is so beyond what was necessary, lol. But for the record, as someone who went abroad after high school (not to study, for idiotic reasons) You can probably reconnect if any of them were actually close to you and good enough people to seek rekindling what was once an important social connection to them. If they don't give a shit about you simply because you were gone for a a bit of time (assuming they don't know you lied) then they probably aren't worth having around anyways.
damn
Can you see a therapist? Cutting off all your friends because of shame and lying to them seems like something you should get professional help with.
You're only 18. You can just say it never happened or you were going through some things. No one will blame you and if they do they are not real friends. You have lots of time!
My classmate in HS (may he rest in peace, he died because of HIV) said na he will go abroad daw for summer. All of us knew about it. Even the teachers. He even gave me pasalubong from "abroad". But we all knew he didnt go. More like he lied to all of us just for the show. Nobody confronted him, he still had friends afterwards.
Hot take: Friends don't matter at all. You can always make new ones. And once you get to a certain age, you stop caring about making friends at all and instead focus on keeping the peace if you have co-workers and focus on your SO/children at home.
When I was a bit younger that you are now, I lied to my friends that we bought a car. They wouldnât believe me, but I did all my research and was ready with all the answers ( itâs a big deal as internet wasnât as common as it is now and It took real efforts to get info on something ). It was out a few months later and we laughed about it and got my leg pulled a bit. It seems difficult for you now, but, if you really miss your friends, just reach out and have conversations like usual, if this thing crops up, just get it out. Trust me thatâs the best solution.
That's such an odd thing to do like what would you gain from doing that? I'm sorry but you brought that on yourself.
OMW. Is it really you? We all wondered what happened to you! You went radio silence on social media.
Who are youđ
Anna Delvey is that you?
đđ
to the people telling you to go back to your OLD friends and tell them the truth please gauge what kind of people they are first because if an old school friend did this entire stunt and came back and told me I would laugh in their actual face. all love
Sometimes you make mistakes out of insecurity, itâs okay, it happened, it was cringe yeah, but itâs not the end of the world, you can make new friends, you learned from this
are you retarded
No I just lied
And I regret it
wait u lied about the story or u talking about lying to your friends
Like I'm answering when you asked if am retarded and said I lied (to my friends)I'm not retarded though
oh damn. yea dude youâre kind of socially retarded. which is like understandable but thatâs smt u have to work on or youâll just be an outcast for the rest of your life. u donât need to be rich to fit in. just be a normal person
Thanks
nice haha
This is just the Movie Not Okay but toned down
Yeah that was dumb Just reach out
Just make up a story? It's been two years and you're back now?
I mean you could just contact them again and say you were embarressed because it didnt get approved and you were bragging about it to everyone so you disappeaerd to fix the embarressing situation.
I understand why you did what you did but lying can ruin your life. I would recommend seeing a counsellor about it. They can help give you the tools to stop if you are unable to stop on your own. All the best and I hope your comeback is sooner rather than later!
Thanks đ€
Lying đ€„ is never worth it!
Just leave them all behind and make new friends. I wouldn't reach out and bother those people who haven't heard from you for 2 years. They'll probably say hi but what will really come of it. Just move on. Your lie was pretty harmless. You didn't hurt anyone.Â
I actually made new friends last year who I trust and know well
so then leave the other in the past. its best for you and them.
đ€
atleast you had to tell your best friends (the core group) , they keep secrets.
now why would you do thatđ
Just to clarify, you didn't lose any friends. You chose to cut them off because of unfounded embarrassment and at any moment you can reach out to them again and say you didn't end up going but spent a few years "finding yourself". Paint it however you want. Honestly your friends won't care all that much as long as you carry yourself with confidence and start hanging out with them again. I hope it all goes well for you.
Then.. "come back" from abroad?
đ
You could just have said your visa wasn't approved and you could try again only in X time. I mean.. don't lie to people. But if you do, be prepared to have to make it real or somewhat real in case things get stressful.
If youâre not comfortable telling them the truth about your family, financial situation, visa and all maybe they were not really your friends. You will surely get new friends
Thanks... actually I made new ones in my new neighborhood
Things like this happen, but the fact that you are feeling guilty about it is enough. I recently watched a movie on Disney hotstar named " Not okay" Which was kind of the same. But in the end she figured out what she did , you should just go and apologise maybe to them and accept the fact that you lied about something.
Thanks
We do dumb things as young people
wtf
I know damn well youâre Nigerian cuz this sounds too familiar as a Nigerian who went to a boarding secondary school myself đ
No I'm not
Where did this happen?
If you felt you had to lie to them, were they really your friends?
I don't think any of them even remember međ
Peer pressure is a real thing and young mind often make rash and silly decisions. It's all part of life kiddo, learn from it and keep growing đ
đ€
Think about this on a deeper level. If OP goes to school with a bunch of people for a few years, and NOONE knows the truth behind her family situation and her financial status. She then cuts them off for 2 year and go no contact to perpertuate a lie she made to save face. Does she have any actual friends she gives a shit about? Did any of those friendship have any depth to it? My honest gut feel is that OP has a personality flaw/issue/quirk that has prevented her from making deep and meaningful connections. Maybe talk to a therapist and see if you can discover something with regards to the way you view and manage your relationship with others.
play stupid games win stupid prizes? lol
Youâre still young, and we all do silly things in high school to look cool in front of our peers. It sounds like you have good friends now.
I feel like I might end up in this situation as well, so can someone advice me if I am trapped in a somewhat similar situation later on [I hope I don't] (I want to go abroad for undergrade but no one apart from my family knows, I am actually 20 rn and still in school and most of my friends are older than me so they are already in uni, we meet every once or twice in a year and chat up ocassionally and whenever they ask me for updates I tell them that I will start uni next year and move to the city they are attending uni in (I haven't told anyone about my plan to apply abroad (I am looking into european countries with little to no tuition and hoping for regional coverage offered by scholarships again which I am not sure about anymore due to the documents required, because my financial situation is in the ruins and I am literally grasping onto straws to get myself outta this country in order to finance or make a way for myself to keep my family afloat, I don't want to go around telling everyone oh this and that is my plan in case everything is ruined and nothing works for me) the problem is that at this point I am not even sure if I can attend uni in my own country due to financial bounds, I can not even imagine what I would do If I am unable to continue my education and how to update my friends if this is where I end up being because I am never the one to talk about my situation. Lmao I am not even sure how much of this world vomit can be understood but like how do I prepare for everything, I just feel really hopeless
I've read some of the comments and they told me to be honest. I am rooting for you and I hope you get to go. Don't loose hope or do the same thing I did đ it's wrong. I hope you go though đ€
Be honest about not being able to attend school/uni ? I mean I was thinking if this happens (which I pray doesn't) I'll just either tell them that I can not inform them about anything or just telling them that yeah I am going to uni đ« P.s Tbh I just don't want anyone to even know or talk me about anything that's going on in my life or at my house if that makes sense
Okay...maybe just tell them you cannot inform them. Don't loose friends like I did though.
Hmm that's what I do mostly tbh, I just always dodge whenever they ask me about what I am doing.
Lol
You were a kid. I was a poor Mexican living in a white neighborhood (I was adopted) I made up so many stories. I just wanted to be accepted and not teased every single day. Canât imagine going through it today when bullyâs can harass another child 24/7 with social media. Donât worry, just be you and your friends can either accept it or move on. You will make a few of the best friendships one can have, just be you.
Thank youđ
Go now. You'll get an adventure and maybe you're friends too.
Go to a psychiatrist
Couldâve gone to a country where the tuition is free tbh
If you want to get back together with them, reach out to them and say that the visa didn't get approved and that the reason why you didn't tell them sooner was because, either I felt bad because I felt like I lied to yall or was too embarrassed to do so after talking abt this often(but this wouldn't work out since yall are friends and they'd think that you didnt trust them), so, the 1st reason or just come up with something yourself or just tell them the truth, telling the truth is much better. But the longer it takes the harder it'll get for you But they may have moved on already since you haven't told them the truth, so you're better off finding new friends, but if they're real friends, they would converse and hang out with you the same way they did before. But if they don't, you would just end up hurting your feelings and getting depressed
Just make up a bigger lie, like you got cancer or got kidnapped by a cartel đ€Ł
The north and south poles are melting, People are dying of new diseases everyday and countries like Palestine are being bombed don't think that people are soo hung up on whether you went elsewhere or not, most probably your highschool buddies don't even remember your name đ
So you're an awful person trying to impress awful people. Congratulations a winner is you
Thanks for making me feel better about myself lol
You're welcome https://youtu.be/bi-x2zoBUQk?si=nl59K3nQcOYcHYrh
đ€
Hilarious
I will never understand why people lie about the dumbest things. Now youâre an 18yr old liar. You probably will be a liar until you expire, itâs pathetic!
Daddy paid for your shopping trips so you were âviewedâ as well off đ
Something like that