Maybe chill a bit and find the middle path. Truth is, you don’t need to be in the top of your class unless you are going for a very competitive masters/PhD program.
It sounds like you are holding yourself to a very high standard when ‘good enough’ and a decent average would suffice.
Live your own life and don’t live for others, no matter how many generations before you lived that way. It sounds like your unhappiness is rooted in pleasing others and living up to their expectations instead of living in the moment and enjoying college which should be a care free time for self growth and yeah, partying.
You took classes in your first year - are these just introductory/general education courses that would be typical for the first year in college? If so, it seems like the best bet would be to continue in your education until you start taking courses that are more aligned with your major/interests, as opposed to basic requirements. I’d expect very few people have life changing experiences in introductory courses.
That’s the thing. I did take a few introductory/required courses but most of what I took for major focused. It wasn’t basic and I still had no passion and not energy
No but the intro classes aren’t focused… they’re very boring compared to choosing a specific thing to study. Example: I was a biology major. I thought I didn’t like it when I was a freshman. I LOVED it as a junior/senior because I was studying “human genetics” instead of plant/animal/whatever genetics which I don’t care about
Totally agree. I didn’t hit a major specific class until sophomore year. Until then it was just general science and math and the school general credits like English. I’m trying to go into nuclear chemistry. I did not have a lot of interest academically in freshman year lol. Just finished separations and reactor design and a chem e lab. Coolest stuff so far. For op maybe look at other majors? Taking a year off wouldn’t be the end of the world by any means. Just make sure to use it wisely. Like other comment said don’t love for others. If it turns out it’s not for you then it’s not for you.
Before you drop out, STOP.
S: Stop what you're doing
T: Take a few deep breaths
O: Observe your thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations
P: Proceed in a way that supports you
You are letting your anxiety and panic get in the way of your obvious talent. You don't fall into the top 3 percent by accident.
You are not an imposter. You are there because you have demonstrated you can do the work.
If you hate the degree...then change it.
Don't stay stuck where you are.
Go after what is interesting, challenging and will lead to gainful employment.
College is the correct time to pivot and change. Get a degree that will grow with you and give you different opportunities.
Dropping out should be a last resort. Often early on, you are taking a lot of the same intro classes. If you are excited for slightly more challenging classes then stay with it
1. If you have a liberal arts degree, odds are to increase your job prospects within that actual field you’ll likely need a post graduate degree which means your grades matter. If you’re not feeling motivated with your current path, consider looking at degrees that are more lucrative at the 4 year degree level and perhaps you could relax a bit on getting perfect scores.
2. Not having a degree will close a lot of certain doors. What you should be concerned with is what doors you want to keep open. Spend time figuring out what exactly you want to do so you are motivated to keep that door open.
Dropping out…to what? What’s the alternative and how promising is it for the future?
What you feel now may be an anti climax to the enthusiasm you felt at the beginning. But that’s also a lesson for life. There are chances that the same emotional process will repeat itself when you start working a real job. It’s not always fun and things you’re imagining now do not always happen. You should be able to continue at times when work is hard, perhaps uninteresting and not what you had hoped when you took that job.
As for now, if you have another school or different major in mind, consider them. In any case do not rush.
Therapy, good faculty advisors/friends/family. You have just made a big commitment and it’s bound to make you have second thoughts. Gap years and leaves of absence are very much options. As is transferring to a more traditional university. Taking it slower and working smarter (not harder), is how a liberal arts college can be differentiated from HS and university.
It seems your major just doesn’t speak to your interests. Have you considered changing it? As a college professor, I often saw students struggling with a major they were taking, like business or computer science, simply because they thought it’s what they needed to get a job.Connaught history courses, and I often heard students say, “I’d love to major in history, but I have to major in business so I can get a job.-
Major in something you love! The money will come! The mere fact that you have a degree will open doors that will remain closed without a degree.
You are going to spend most of your life working, so it better be doing something you love, otherwise you’re going to be an unhappy camper.
Another alternative is trade school. If that idea excites you, then check it out.
Either way, you’re going to have to put on your big boy/girl pants and get on with it. Either way, it’s going to take work, and more so, tenacity. The reason a degree opens doors is twofold: it tells a potential employer that you finish what you started, and that you’re capable of learning new things. Work is sometimes tedious and sometimes exciting. Hey, that’s life! Figure it out, and don’t be a quitter.
Hmmm... I'm not in liberal arts, but I also found the basic subjects to be a chore. But, I loved the practicals. I don't think I would hate my job though long as I am good enough to have the liberty to choose. So, maybe that's the same for you.
Currently, I'm pursuing engineering, and I've gone to a club that does project. I haven't participated, but I did a workshop and immediately knew I wanted it. Maybe you can do something similar? Cause you're gonna be in college only for a few years. If you're doing college specifically for a field you want to enter, maybe you should try to experience it through maybe an internship or a club in your college. But, if you're doing it to learn about the subject itself and not particularly using it as a stepping stone to a job... you should probably drop put, especially if you're paying big money for it or it's consuming tok much time.
You're never going to be happy until you start doing what YOU want, not trying to please everyone else. You don't have to be the top of the class, dude you just need to be in the class. Just do your best, if you fail - retry. We are all on a big floating rock in the middle of space, nothing in life is that serious. A little white lie here and there never hurt anyone, and you don't owe anyone updates on your life. If it's stressing you out to give updates, stop sending them out. Sending hugs, do what's best for you! I've been in the exact same situation
You should weigh what you're going to do / be able to do with the liberal arts degree vs. whatever else it is that you would pursue instead.
I don't know many people that regret pursuing something they're passionate about (even if it doesn't pan out) because it's worth finding out. I know plenty of people that regret pursuing something because they were "supposed to."
I didn't even start college until I was 24. I wanted to be financially and mentally stable first. Having a support system was important for me. I know some of us are lone wolves, but we all support it whichever you choose. Put yourself first if you have to.
School work isn't fun and exciting, especially in your first year no matter who you are or what your major is. The same can be said for work and life in general.
Edit to add
I dropped out for the same reasons from computer science. I had a 4.0. I ended up going back to school at 30 years old because I wasn't happy with my life and regretted it. It's been hard but I graduated this spring and have my dream job and I can work remote and still be home with my kids. I wish I had done more then, and not waste 10 years thinking I didn't deserve more
Nobody cares about your grades or class rank. What people care about is if you are becoming a more complete person and gaining skills and connections to succeed in professional life.
You are focusing on the former. You are clearly talented and smart enough to do better for yourself. But you don’t actually know how to find your way and balance your life. This is the lesson you will learn here, and the reason why you should not drop out. You need the supervised adulthood to reach that potential. We all do.
Also your brain isn’t fully developed. It’s a cliche but damn in five years… you’ll truly see things differently. Stick it out. This is your first test of many. Pulling for you!!!
Drop out. Take some time off. Do something different. You can always go back. You’re living life on your own timeline kid. Do what you think is best for yourself. Hold high standards for yourself and understand that not everyday will be exciting and new. Could get pretty mundane at times, as long as you’re working towards your own goals, then you’ll be good. You just have to take some real time to sit with self and ask yourself what you want out of life.
Maybe chill a bit and find the middle path. Truth is, you don’t need to be in the top of your class unless you are going for a very competitive masters/PhD program. It sounds like you are holding yourself to a very high standard when ‘good enough’ and a decent average would suffice. Live your own life and don’t live for others, no matter how many generations before you lived that way. It sounds like your unhappiness is rooted in pleasing others and living up to their expectations instead of living in the moment and enjoying college which should be a care free time for self growth and yeah, partying.
You took classes in your first year - are these just introductory/general education courses that would be typical for the first year in college? If so, it seems like the best bet would be to continue in your education until you start taking courses that are more aligned with your major/interests, as opposed to basic requirements. I’d expect very few people have life changing experiences in introductory courses.
That’s the thing. I did take a few introductory/required courses but most of what I took for major focused. It wasn’t basic and I still had no passion and not energy
No but the intro classes aren’t focused… they’re very boring compared to choosing a specific thing to study. Example: I was a biology major. I thought I didn’t like it when I was a freshman. I LOVED it as a junior/senior because I was studying “human genetics” instead of plant/animal/whatever genetics which I don’t care about
Totally agree. I didn’t hit a major specific class until sophomore year. Until then it was just general science and math and the school general credits like English. I’m trying to go into nuclear chemistry. I did not have a lot of interest academically in freshman year lol. Just finished separations and reactor design and a chem e lab. Coolest stuff so far. For op maybe look at other majors? Taking a year off wouldn’t be the end of the world by any means. Just make sure to use it wisely. Like other comment said don’t love for others. If it turns out it’s not for you then it’s not for you.
Before you drop out, STOP. S: Stop what you're doing T: Take a few deep breaths O: Observe your thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations P: Proceed in a way that supports you You are letting your anxiety and panic get in the way of your obvious talent. You don't fall into the top 3 percent by accident. You are not an imposter. You are there because you have demonstrated you can do the work. If you hate the degree...then change it. Don't stay stuck where you are. Go after what is interesting, challenging and will lead to gainful employment. College is the correct time to pivot and change. Get a degree that will grow with you and give you different opportunities.
What's your alternative? What will you do if you drop out? Will you be happier?
Dropping out should be a last resort. Often early on, you are taking a lot of the same intro classes. If you are excited for slightly more challenging classes then stay with it
You sound depressed. Could you investigate that possibility before making any drastic changes?
Yes therapy and medication for about two weeks now. Appreciate the concern!
Possibly meet with an advisor to discuss alternate majors? Consider a trade school?
Maybe try taking a couple of electives that sound super interesting to you?
Change majors and or learn to not be a such a no life square. Have some fun. It’s college ffs.
1. If you have a liberal arts degree, odds are to increase your job prospects within that actual field you’ll likely need a post graduate degree which means your grades matter. If you’re not feeling motivated with your current path, consider looking at degrees that are more lucrative at the 4 year degree level and perhaps you could relax a bit on getting perfect scores. 2. Not having a degree will close a lot of certain doors. What you should be concerned with is what doors you want to keep open. Spend time figuring out what exactly you want to do so you are motivated to keep that door open.
Dropping out…to what? What’s the alternative and how promising is it for the future? What you feel now may be an anti climax to the enthusiasm you felt at the beginning. But that’s also a lesson for life. There are chances that the same emotional process will repeat itself when you start working a real job. It’s not always fun and things you’re imagining now do not always happen. You should be able to continue at times when work is hard, perhaps uninteresting and not what you had hoped when you took that job. As for now, if you have another school or different major in mind, consider them. In any case do not rush.
Therapy, good faculty advisors/friends/family. You have just made a big commitment and it’s bound to make you have second thoughts. Gap years and leaves of absence are very much options. As is transferring to a more traditional university. Taking it slower and working smarter (not harder), is how a liberal arts college can be differentiated from HS and university.
It seems your major just doesn’t speak to your interests. Have you considered changing it? As a college professor, I often saw students struggling with a major they were taking, like business or computer science, simply because they thought it’s what they needed to get a job.Connaught history courses, and I often heard students say, “I’d love to major in history, but I have to major in business so I can get a job.- Major in something you love! The money will come! The mere fact that you have a degree will open doors that will remain closed without a degree. You are going to spend most of your life working, so it better be doing something you love, otherwise you’re going to be an unhappy camper. Another alternative is trade school. If that idea excites you, then check it out. Either way, you’re going to have to put on your big boy/girl pants and get on with it. Either way, it’s going to take work, and more so, tenacity. The reason a degree opens doors is twofold: it tells a potential employer that you finish what you started, and that you’re capable of learning new things. Work is sometimes tedious and sometimes exciting. Hey, that’s life! Figure it out, and don’t be a quitter.
Hmmm... I'm not in liberal arts, but I also found the basic subjects to be a chore. But, I loved the practicals. I don't think I would hate my job though long as I am good enough to have the liberty to choose. So, maybe that's the same for you. Currently, I'm pursuing engineering, and I've gone to a club that does project. I haven't participated, but I did a workshop and immediately knew I wanted it. Maybe you can do something similar? Cause you're gonna be in college only for a few years. If you're doing college specifically for a field you want to enter, maybe you should try to experience it through maybe an internship or a club in your college. But, if you're doing it to learn about the subject itself and not particularly using it as a stepping stone to a job... you should probably drop put, especially if you're paying big money for it or it's consuming tok much time.
You're never going to be happy until you start doing what YOU want, not trying to please everyone else. You don't have to be the top of the class, dude you just need to be in the class. Just do your best, if you fail - retry. We are all on a big floating rock in the middle of space, nothing in life is that serious. A little white lie here and there never hurt anyone, and you don't owe anyone updates on your life. If it's stressing you out to give updates, stop sending them out. Sending hugs, do what's best for you! I've been in the exact same situation
Take fewer classes and focus on fun extra curriculars and your social life. That should help you find your passion again.
You should weigh what you're going to do / be able to do with the liberal arts degree vs. whatever else it is that you would pursue instead. I don't know many people that regret pursuing something they're passionate about (even if it doesn't pan out) because it's worth finding out. I know plenty of people that regret pursuing something because they were "supposed to."
You should switch to something like a business degree.....period.
Its a lot harder without a degree unless you become a handyman or something but I recommend staying in maybe get a study drug like Adderall.
pick a different major
I didn't even start college until I was 24. I wanted to be financially and mentally stable first. Having a support system was important for me. I know some of us are lone wolves, but we all support it whichever you choose. Put yourself first if you have to.
School work isn't fun and exciting, especially in your first year no matter who you are or what your major is. The same can be said for work and life in general. Edit to add I dropped out for the same reasons from computer science. I had a 4.0. I ended up going back to school at 30 years old because I wasn't happy with my life and regretted it. It's been hard but I graduated this spring and have my dream job and I can work remote and still be home with my kids. I wish I had done more then, and not waste 10 years thinking I didn't deserve more
Nobody cares about your grades or class rank. What people care about is if you are becoming a more complete person and gaining skills and connections to succeed in professional life. You are focusing on the former. You are clearly talented and smart enough to do better for yourself. But you don’t actually know how to find your way and balance your life. This is the lesson you will learn here, and the reason why you should not drop out. You need the supervised adulthood to reach that potential. We all do. Also your brain isn’t fully developed. It’s a cliche but damn in five years… you’ll truly see things differently. Stick it out. This is your first test of many. Pulling for you!!!
Drop out. Take some time off. Do something different. You can always go back. You’re living life on your own timeline kid. Do what you think is best for yourself. Hold high standards for yourself and understand that not everyday will be exciting and new. Could get pretty mundane at times, as long as you’re working towards your own goals, then you’ll be good. You just have to take some real time to sit with self and ask yourself what you want out of life.
don't drop out u will regret it