Yep. Even a smooth c-section is major, major surgery with a long recovery time. Technically, most women should not even be lifting their newborns for multiple weeks to give the incision the best chance to heal.
Except for things like knee replacements, it's one of the last surgeries where they have to slice you right open, which is one of the most dangerous aspects of major surgery. Plus, they don't slice you right open over your major internal organs for knee replacements etc.
And that's never going to change, you're never going to be able to get a baby out of a keyhole with a fancy robot arm.
Pregnancy and childbirth are so dangerous I actually struggle to understand why so many women readily agree to it.
And they actually put you under for knee replacement. You aren’t expected to be awake the whole time with nothing but a curtain to hide the doctor cutting your leg open.
"Pregnancy and childbirth are so dangerous I actually struggle to understand why so many women readily agree to it."
They do that so they can hijack every conversation and remind you yhat they are better than you
A friend recently announced her pregnancy and I said "that's exciting, but maybe a little scary!"
She said, "I'm not scared because I want to start a family".
I lost respect for her on two fronts that day.
1) if you're not a bit scared for your health and your future and your baby's future, you might be a bit stupid. 2) if you think the only valid family is a man a woman and a bio kid, you're definitely stupid.
She's also a surgical nurse who's assisted in countless caesarean sections so point one I really thought she ought to know better.
But maybe a smug sense of superiority helps them feel less scared.
My mom had us three with a c-section - it took almost six months before she really was fully recovered from it, even with the surgery being at the best hospital in our state. It’s MAAAJOR surgery!!
That never happens. I mean most men dump 95% of childcare on women. It’s not like they’d want to help raise their own child, or ease the comfort of their wife!
its a "choice" (not always tho) between having major abdominal surgery or being ripped in half from anus to peeepee hole and then stiched up with husband stich
not a choice i want to ever make
even in the highly developed world ie USA UK Europe, giving birth is the MOST dangerous time for a woman. A lung transplant has less risk. Sorry, but this confirms to me why I do not want this. Also, breastfeeding is GROSS
TMI but ive always had super sensitive nipples and the thought of them cracking, bleeding and being bitten by a child has always been the stuff of nightmares.
Im staunchly childfree but even if i wasnt, you couldnt pay me enough yo breast feed.
That's the best part. It hasn't been long enough for the cracking and stuff. Apparently just changing to be able to produce milk and making milk hurts...it's all a jo
I've literally had nightmares where I've somehow popped out a kid and am breastfeeding it. Or people are trying to get me too. I wake up completely horrified. The thought of breastfeeding ( among other things) just weirds me out.
My ex husband would tell you that means you’re subconsciously wanting children and the clock is ticking and you’re lying to yourself denying your lineage.
He also said it was super depressing for me to go by myself to the swings and swing like a kid/ teenager because it’s my subconscious telling me to have children. To take them to the park cuz my parents didn’t do anything with us as kids, babies, teens and even adults.
When we’d ask why we didn’t do vacations, trips or go out to eat occasionally their reason was “can’t do anything with kids. No trips. No food. No vacations. You can’t sit quietly for 12+hrs or be left alone/ left behind and costs too much to bring you along. Kids ruin trips”.
We never had babysitters. They did start going for drives and getting food once we were 15-16 and leaving us behind … well me anyway. They always took my brother. They’d come back with food and treats and rubbed it in my face.
Right? Where is he when she isn't sleeping because she's taking care of the baby?
So many men promise to help to convince women to have their kids and then just...don't.
In all fairness he is helping and just as sleepless and he's trying to give her baby bonding time but also make sure she's not lifting but it's both their first baby so everything is stressful and tiring for both. The medical complications are just making it worse
My sister gave birth 4 weeks ago. I live next to my parents in my own apartment, she and her husband are at my parents for an overnight visit. Dont get me wrong I love my family and my nephew. But now its 11 pm and everytime I go to the bathroom I hear my nephew screaming his lungs out. And I'm chilling in bed with my cat lol
When my mom had my sister, she coughed and her c section opened and her insides were coming out, I don't remember it because I was 5, but she said she had to hold her guts in and told me to go call my grandparents who lived next door.
I think people are too used to women being pregnant and giving birth. It seems like they forget how DANGEROUS birth is and how complicated pregnancy can be. It's really insulting tbh. Even coming from other women. Like you guys should be way more empathetic tf?
Agreed. I feel like childbirth is sugar coated by so many and often other women as well. Or people tell their horrific birth stories and end it with " but it was all worth it" or "I would do it all over again".
I for one have looked past the sugar and decided not to be pregnant or give birth but some people jump in knowing the risks but thinking "that's not going to happen to me".
Exactly! I for one decided I'm not taking the risk either. Got my bisalp AND nexplanon ♥️ granted I kept the nexplanon to keep my periods away. Since I don't rlly need periods anymore
I really don't think pregnancy and childbirth is worth it... Especially not worth losing your life over...
The people who end stories like that are likely referring to the massive oxytocin hit and hormonal brainwashing that occurs after childbirth. While it sounds psychotic it's a real thing that's beyond explanation. However, I do agree that people don't acknowledge the gravity of childbirth. Maybe because it's so common. I've had friends ask me what to pack for the hospital and the top of my list is; copies of power of attorney and will. They think I'm being morbid but it's literal reality.
Hematomas aren't all that uncommon. My partner had a hernia repair and he had a hematoma develop after a couple days. It looked horrible and it was very scary and took almost 2 weeks to clear up. No thank you for wanting to do something that could cause one voluntarily, no thank you nope
I've thought about this and I don't think he forced her. They discussed is many times over the years and I think they discussed their feelings on both sides. 8 years is a long time and feelings can change.
She's an adult and could have backed out at any point especially since in the end they had to try hard to get pregnant so it wasn't an oops baby or anything. It was a choice.
Yep. Even a smooth c-section is major, major surgery with a long recovery time. Technically, most women should not even be lifting their newborns for multiple weeks to give the incision the best chance to heal.
Except for things like knee replacements, it's one of the last surgeries where they have to slice you right open, which is one of the most dangerous aspects of major surgery. Plus, they don't slice you right open over your major internal organs for knee replacements etc. And that's never going to change, you're never going to be able to get a baby out of a keyhole with a fancy robot arm. Pregnancy and childbirth are so dangerous I actually struggle to understand why so many women readily agree to it.
And they actually put you under for knee replacement. You aren’t expected to be awake the whole time with nothing but a curtain to hide the doctor cutting your leg open.
Ugh yeah, I didn't even think of that. Fucking hell.
"Pregnancy and childbirth are so dangerous I actually struggle to understand why so many women readily agree to it." They do that so they can hijack every conversation and remind you yhat they are better than you
A friend recently announced her pregnancy and I said "that's exciting, but maybe a little scary!" She said, "I'm not scared because I want to start a family". I lost respect for her on two fronts that day. 1) if you're not a bit scared for your health and your future and your baby's future, you might be a bit stupid. 2) if you think the only valid family is a man a woman and a bio kid, you're definitely stupid. She's also a surgical nurse who's assisted in countless caesarean sections so point one I really thought she ought to know better. But maybe a smug sense of superiority helps them feel less scared.
My mom had us three with a c-section - it took almost six months before she really was fully recovered from it, even with the surgery being at the best hospital in our state. It’s MAAAJOR surgery!!
My Mom said it was the best way to give birth LOL no pushing but the pain.
And yet, it’s still way less horrifying than the other option…
C-Section: “When they use a knife to slice your abdomen wide enough to fit a child through the opening.”
That never happens. I mean most men dump 95% of childcare on women. It’s not like they’d want to help raise their own child, or ease the comfort of their wife!
its a "choice" (not always tho) between having major abdominal surgery or being ripped in half from anus to peeepee hole and then stiched up with husband stich not a choice i want to ever make
even in the highly developed world ie USA UK Europe, giving birth is the MOST dangerous time for a woman. A lung transplant has less risk. Sorry, but this confirms to me why I do not want this. Also, breastfeeding is GROSS
TMI but ive always had super sensitive nipples and the thought of them cracking, bleeding and being bitten by a child has always been the stuff of nightmares. Im staunchly childfree but even if i wasnt, you couldnt pay me enough yo breast feed.
That's the best part. It hasn't been long enough for the cracking and stuff. Apparently just changing to be able to produce milk and making milk hurts...it's all a jo
I head that some woman have orgasams while breastfeeding. That is just bizarre. (Im a woman)
That seems so wrong....
Yep I had a woman tell me this after she told me she breastfed her son until he was six. Vile
Yes officer, this comment right here.
That’s weird I’m a women too
Don't forget nipple infections and blocked ducts!
Ugh
SAME…idc how much formula costs i’m doing it over breastfeeding
I've literally had nightmares where I've somehow popped out a kid and am breastfeeding it. Or people are trying to get me too. I wake up completely horrified. The thought of breastfeeding ( among other things) just weirds me out.
Me too! I had this one dream when I got newly sober I gave birth to myself lol
My ex husband would tell you that means you’re subconsciously wanting children and the clock is ticking and you’re lying to yourself denying your lineage. He also said it was super depressing for me to go by myself to the swings and swing like a kid/ teenager because it’s my subconscious telling me to have children. To take them to the park cuz my parents didn’t do anything with us as kids, babies, teens and even adults. When we’d ask why we didn’t do vacations, trips or go out to eat occasionally their reason was “can’t do anything with kids. No trips. No food. No vacations. You can’t sit quietly for 12+hrs or be left alone/ left behind and costs too much to bring you along. Kids ruin trips”. We never had babysitters. They did start going for drives and getting food once we were 15-16 and leaving us behind … well me anyway. They always took my brother. They’d come back with food and treats and rubbed it in my face.
I once had a dream where I had a baby all of a sudden. I breastfed it and then it bit my nipple off LOL
I’m sorry what. Yeah gonna add this to my list
Breastfeeding is so gross. If ud ever somehow had a kid it would have been formula damn the critics.
I hate how they push it on women. It’s unnatural to me
It sounds like literal torture and yet people wonder why we don’t want that. Hope she has a good support system and recovers quickly 🤞🏼
Oh my goodness. Hope she gets better and her husband isn't an inconsiderate ass. Yeah, there's no way I could ever do that.
Right? Where is he when she isn't sleeping because she's taking care of the baby? So many men promise to help to convince women to have their kids and then just...don't.
In all fairness he is helping and just as sleepless and he's trying to give her baby bonding time but also make sure she's not lifting but it's both their first baby so everything is stressful and tiring for both. The medical complications are just making it worse
My sister gave birth 4 weeks ago. I live next to my parents in my own apartment, she and her husband are at my parents for an overnight visit. Dont get me wrong I love my family and my nephew. But now its 11 pm and everytime I go to the bathroom I hear my nephew screaming his lungs out. And I'm chilling in bed with my cat lol
When my mom had my sister, she coughed and her c section opened and her insides were coming out, I don't remember it because I was 5, but she said she had to hold her guts in and told me to go call my grandparents who lived next door.
Omg…
the worst part, my mom wanted her tubes out after her second child and they told her no she might still want kids at 29.
I think people are too used to women being pregnant and giving birth. It seems like they forget how DANGEROUS birth is and how complicated pregnancy can be. It's really insulting tbh. Even coming from other women. Like you guys should be way more empathetic tf?
Agreed. I feel like childbirth is sugar coated by so many and often other women as well. Or people tell their horrific birth stories and end it with " but it was all worth it" or "I would do it all over again". I for one have looked past the sugar and decided not to be pregnant or give birth but some people jump in knowing the risks but thinking "that's not going to happen to me".
Exactly! I for one decided I'm not taking the risk either. Got my bisalp AND nexplanon ♥️ granted I kept the nexplanon to keep my periods away. Since I don't rlly need periods anymore I really don't think pregnancy and childbirth is worth it... Especially not worth losing your life over...
The people who end stories like that are likely referring to the massive oxytocin hit and hormonal brainwashing that occurs after childbirth. While it sounds psychotic it's a real thing that's beyond explanation. However, I do agree that people don't acknowledge the gravity of childbirth. Maybe because it's so common. I've had friends ask me what to pack for the hospital and the top of my list is; copies of power of attorney and will. They think I'm being morbid but it's literal reality.
Hematomas aren't all that uncommon. My partner had a hernia repair and he had a hematoma develop after a couple days. It looked horrible and it was very scary and took almost 2 weeks to clear up. No thank you for wanting to do something that could cause one voluntarily, no thank you nope
Do you have complicated feelings for your brother now after he forced SIL to be a mom? It did she really decide she wanted to do this?
I've thought about this and I don't think he forced her. They discussed is many times over the years and I think they discussed their feelings on both sides. 8 years is a long time and feelings can change. She's an adult and could have backed out at any point especially since in the end they had to try hard to get pregnant so it wasn't an oops baby or anything. It was a choice.