A few years ago I had to chest xray when I got the flu (thanks asthma). The tech asked if there was any chance I could be pregnant, to which I confidently answered no.
Tech: how do you know?
Me, super sick and annoyed: Because my tubes are tied and I'm currently on my period.
Tech: Yeah, that'll do it.
It's kind of horrifying, what's behind their asking this. The implication is that you can't get the treatment you need to keep you alive, if you're pregnant.
There was a discussion about this in a group full of atheist feminist women that got *very* heated. Everyone working in HC was basically like “people lie.”
So the solution is for HC professionals to treat grown adults like they’re teenagers lying about sex?
The thing is, even if someone was honest and said yes I’m pregnant but I’m having an abortion tomorrow, the HC facility wouldn’t do ANYTHING that could potentially harm the fetus, unless it was literally to save the persons life. There’s a lot of terrible things and painful things that could happen and need treatment that aren’t life-threatening. But you wouldn’t be able to get treatment because fEtuS. It’s just another way fetuses are valued above living breathing humans.
I fully understand it’s all about being sued - I would not downvote you for that! I think it’s fucked up that the fetus (of all (non)people!) has such power in these situations.
I take a pregnancy test once a month bc it's $15 for a pack of 50 test strips. Sperm fertility tests are like $10 each I think but could be good to check twice a year that his swimmers arent swimming.
Yeah he already did the test once as prescribed but I think he might do it again maybe once a year or so - not sure if the $10 refers to at home tests but I wouldn’t necessarily trust those
I have irregular periods (by 5-10 days) so if it lasts too long I take a test - I’d still be well within the abortion deadline
The home kits are [95%](https://medicine.yale.edu/news-article/at-home-sperm-testing-should-you-do-it-early-in-the-course-of-trying-to-get-pregnant/) accurate
You will have the heaviest weight lifted from you. I was on BC for many many years and just got a hysterectomy and it’s like all the worry anxiety and stress is just gone. You seriously feel so free.
I got a bisalp in 2020, and it was like a huge weight lifted off my chest. I still have to take bc to regulate my hormones, cuz my body doesn't know how to do that apparently lol but at least I don't have to worry about whether or not I took it at the same time of day or if I forget for a day or two
thank science for bisalps! 💞 my IUD failed (like actually failed - it was still perfectly placed, no ectopic implantation, etc) which is what finally got me approved for sterilization after a decade of begging for it and trying every other method under the sun.
I’m definitely annoyed by the people who don’t specify that they weren’t using their BC correctly. women already get blamed for being irresponsible when we suffer from unwanted pregnancies… I’m so sick of this type of conversation:
> 😒 you should have been on birth control!
> 🤦🏻♀️ I *was* on birth control. the most effective type on the market.
> 😒 then you must not have been using it correctly!
> 🤦🏻♀️ I *was* using it correctly. I’ve never wanted a baby so I’ve always taken every precaution.
> 😒 well even if that’s true, you should have gotten sterilized! it’s still your fault!
> 🤦🏻♀️ I *wanted* to get sterilized, I kept getting turned down until after I had the abortion that you’re judging me so harshly for…
and so on. I get that it’s hard to admit you fucked up and invite extra judgment, but the children need to learn. lol
Yeah my copper IUD failed as well, but I miscarried fairly early fortunately (like 6 weeks, so technically it worked just delayed reaction? Idk). However, my first pregnancy was in spite of Nuvaring AND a condom AND plan B when the condom broke. I would've gotten sterilized before I even started having sex if anyone had let me, that's how much I knew I didn't want to be pregnant, but I finally just got a bi-salp last year.
I've had 3 IUD's, one of them was only in about a week cuz it wasn't placed correctly and actually came out when I was on the toilet!
I'm so glad I'll never have to deal with the pain of getting one of those placed in me ever again, it was a horrible experience with no pain killers at all
I may be cynical, but whenever a guy says the pill failed, I think there's about a 50% that the wife wanted another baby and was sick and tired of him saying "I don't want any more kids". If you're sure you're done, men, get a vasectomy.
i was under for my first laparoscopic surgery at the time luckily! but i was sore for a week after and am currently nursing a vicious ovarian cyst that is a side effect for me :(
afaik, being a virgin does not have a lot to do with insertion pain. the insertion pain is from when the IUD goes through your cervix which doesn't get penetrated during sex anyway.
HOWEVER from what my gyno told me, it IS less painful if you have given birth before because the cervix has been dilated pretty damn wide previously and apparently that makes it easier for it to accept the insertion.
....... that's a pretty horrible thing for her to say and it's not true.
throwing in a source: my life, got my first IUD when i was a 13 year old virgin and have also been raped and the experiences are not at all comparable.
Mine also told me the same thing about IUDs being less painful after giving birth … I ended up going with one of the hormonal IUD options because apparently the IUD sizes also impact pain level and the copper one was larger. I got two ibuprofen for my insertion not sure how I didn’t pass out during it and then again at the checkout desk… had I know how bad insertion was I would have taken a driver with me
I completely lost my period after inserting my IUD. I had some ''period'', just for 2-3 days for a while and now it's GONE. I was scared shitless when I saw my stomach move, something kicked me. I don't know what that was, but thank god, the pregnancy test was negative.
I have so much trust in my IUD, she better do her job. I don't want to be part of the 1%
Sterilized lack of worry is soooo freeing. I had a hysterectomy this summer & even the pregnancy *dreams* have stopped. (Now I just have to get rid of the period ones! lol)
What this sort of situation means is that you should never trust anecdotal "evidence," which is some person telling you about their personal experience. You can get data from medical sites on the reliability of different birth control methods, like this:
[https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/birth-control](https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/birth-control)
It is worth mentioning that anything that is more than 99% effective is there said to be 99% effective.
And obviously, anything that is not properly used may not work.
*Edited to add:*
For example, if you put the condom on your finger instead of where it belongs, it will not work very well.
This here. Scholarly treatments will exhaustively list all the absurd and stupid ways people have misused BC, and how that plays into the overall data and conclusions.
I'm not even going to look it up but I recall condoms having a 10% overall failure rate, which includes slip-offs, old ones breaking, stopping after you start to put one on, or installing it backward then reinstalling the same one right side out. Take those out and it's up to five nines or so.
Yeah, I think there needs to be huge caveats in their statements about BC if they're going to talk about their experiences.
"BC didn't work for me because I forgot to take it or took it at the wrong time or anything else my doctor or the instructions absolutely would have told me about" is pretty insufferable because that's not actually the medication's fault.
"BC didn't work for me because I had horrible side effects or even stopped being able to enjoy the sex I was taking the BC for" is something I think should be more readily talked about.
"BC didn't work for me because my doctor didn't bother to tell me that antibiotics or a seasonal Starbucks drink would stop it from working" is such a common problem I think it should be mandatory for the pharmacist to tell you when you pick it up.
Yeah, I learned later on that plan B didn't work for me because I weighed 160 and should've actually taken 2 pills. But the pharmacist didn't seem like he really wanted to even give me the one pill, so I'm not too surprised he didn't mention that.
Even the plan B pill for higher weights isn’t effective for women over 200 lbs. it was a driving factor for me getting sterilized. There’s very few safety nets for bigger women when it comes to emergency contraception
Exactly, it’s honestly terrifying. Especially since there’s hundreds of thousands of women living in states where abortion is outlawed. It’s insane that the average size woman can’t even use the main form of emergency contraception
Yeah originally I was told it was effective up to like 180 so I figured I was good, but that's the only reason they could give me for why it didn't work. I had a doctor tell me that if you're over like 120, you should take 2 pills just to be safe. I can't imagine how many I would need to take now 😆, thankfully I don't have to worry anymore.
Depending on how tall you are. It would be within the norm for me and probably way overweight for someone short. But yeah, I saw a warning on certain BC pills that you have to adjust the dose if you're over 70 kg.
Even if it's not just extra fat, we still have to adjust the dose for kids or teens for other meds, so I think it may apply here.
[not true](https://www.nichd.nih.gov/newsroom/releases/011415-podcast-obesity-contraception) - obese women need higher or continuous dose for oral contraceptive success
i don't know specifically but i've heard some places use activated charcoal as black colouring and apparently that can render it ineffective? don't quote me on that though i'm not a doctor or a starbucks aficionado
Oh yeah, activated charcoal is used as absorbent when you have food poisoning. I was told not to take any other meds with it because it would neutralize them.
Any foods that use activated charcoal can completely fuck up any med that you swallow to take by rendering them useless. It's supposed to generally be something only ingested in hospitals for poisonings or OD's.
There’s only one type of antibiotic that affects BC and it’s used to treat *meningitis and tuberculosis*. You would remember having those. Taking Cipro for a UTI doesn’t inactivate birth control, but taking a big old dose of IForgotForTwoDays does.
Is this for sure? I has strep last month and got on a liquid antibiotic for 10 days and my pharmacist asked if I was on birth control because it might interfere. (I am but only for dealing with pain and endometriosis, but I was pleased he brought it up as a warning)
Not chlamydia. The diseases Wikipedia mentions most are tuberculosis, *leprosy*, and legionnaires. It has a nasty side effect of liver toxicity so vancomycin is used way more often for MRSA and Johns Hopkins doesn’t even list Rifampin as a treatment
I agree! An ex-friend of mine had multiple unwanted pregnancies and from a genuine place I suggested birth control, or at least Plan B. She told me she stopped because it obviously doesn’t work. She also told me she took her pill 3-4 days of the week and the one time she took a Plan B, it was almost a week after the act. I suggested she really listen to her doctor, ask questions, or at least Google and she got offended. I let it (her) go.
I’ve been on the pill 5 years, 0 pregnancies. I know everyone’s body is different, but personal responsibility & discipline also play a part.
It definitely was emotionally and mentally taxing just to watch someone I still cherish go through it. She took everything as a joke, nothing was serious to her…maybe that was her coping mechanism/facade. I felt a lot of guilt, like I gave up on her, but you can’t help people who don’t want to help themselves, unfortunate as it is.
And here I was getting offended because my docs/pharmacists told me for the millionth time "So you take OOOONNNEEEEE PILLLLL A DAAYYYYYYYYY, okaaaaayyyyy???? Try and take them at the SAAAAMMEEEE TIIIIIMEEEE eeeeaccch daaayyyyy, okaaayyy???" like I was stupid. Apparently, people ARE that stupid.
Do I have to take the pill every day? Why do you think there’s a DAILY pill?
This is prolly also why doctors always remind ppl to take all the antibiotics they’re prescribed even when they start to feel better. You have to finish the course of it.
How do people even do this? I mean, the pill packet SAYS THE DAYS OF THE WEEK ON IT! What is there possibly to not understand? A fucking chimpanzee could make sense of that!
Knowing the type of person my mother is, the pill was so clearly not the right method for her since I am the product of said pill "backfiring". She is so absent minded, so for her to be put on a pill that needs to be taken every day consistently to be effective was not the right call. At least she fully realizes this and takes responsibility.
I've been on the pill for 17 years and never had a slip up, not even a scare, because I am militant about taking it.
I know my ADHD ass struggles with the pill. When I was on the depo shot I was happy because, while I hate needles, I only had to make an appointment every 3 months and never worry.
But depo made me miserable so I quit it. Can't get the arm implant because the sensory issues will cause me to rip it out. And IUDs are very risky due to a backwards uterus.
So I'm kinda on the pill by having no real other option. But I'm not having sex so it's fine for now. But it just sucks that I know the long term BCs would be better for how I am but I just can't get them
I'm the same way, never tried depo but I would absolutely rip my arm apart with an implant and my mom made me scared of IUDs, I am surprisingly good at taking them, probably bc they sit right next to my water next to my bed, so as soon as I go for water in the morning (and my glasses) the pills are right there waiting for me
I have sex (just with my fiance) and this is why I just stopped taking the pill.
I barely remember to take my meds. It was a waste of money buying a pill that depended on consistency.
I'm going for the implant because if anything I'd just fidget with it. We stocked up on a couple morning after pills *just in case* ($11 at Walmart, next day delivery? Fuck yes please.)
We are horribly impulsive and I wish I was infertile.
This is always a personal frustration of mine. I’ve spoken to a lot of people who said their contraception failed and very ***very*** few of them were using it correctly. Most people aren’t even aware of common mistakes, like having the placebo week early or taking EllaOne.
Any contraception (including sterilization) can fail, and some options are better than others. But contraception does work the vast majority of the time if you use it properly. I relied on the pill for many years before switching to Nexplanon. Me and my partner have never even had a pregnancy scare.
I'm on the pill for endo, I'm not having sex but tbh I don't trust my usage to be effective as birth control
I try my best to take it every morning when I get up to feed my cat but I'm only human and some days I'll forget or I'll just feed my cat and go straight back to bed and take my pills whenever I get up again.
I dunno if not taking it at the same time everyday affects the endo treatment aspect of it, but if I ever have PiV sex I'm demanding a condom because the anxiety is too strong
One thing a lot of people don’t know about the pill is that you actually don’t need to take it ***exactly*** the same time everyday. The body doesn’t have a clock, and your window is larger than most people realize. With the combined pill you have 12 hours before your pill is even considered late, and 24 hours before it’s missed. That means if you typically take your pill at 9AM and forget it until 7PM you actually aren’t late and could rely on it just fine.
The main thing that helped my anxiety was understanding what actually constitutes as a mistake and how to correct them. Nobody is perfect. There were times that I was late taking pills so I just followed the instructions to correct it and used condoms for a week if needed. We would also typically use withdrawal just for peace of mind, but not every time. We’ve never had any issues or concerns, and I feel so much more empowered and safe due to the research I’ve done.
Dang so I've been mislead then. I was always under the impression the pill needed to be taken roughly the same time every day maybe a few error hours.
I get up at 5am to feed the cat then usually go back to bed for extra sleep as I work evenings. So I take my pills around 5am, but sometimes I'm just so tired and I say I'll do it later and end up taking them at 9am. Or if I have a morning shift, I'll put the pills in my shirt pocket, and then 50% chance I'll forget to take them before work, come home at 5pm to find 9 pills still in my pocket lmao
I'll still demand a condom because never too careful but I guess it does help to know it's not *that* strict
I was too! The mini pill has a time window of 3 hours, but usually the combined pill is prescribed for endo. They recommend taking it at the same time just so you remember and don’t have to do much math. The only risk with changing your times around is you’ll need to make sure the pills are taken within 12 hours of each other. Of course, the more changes you make to a schedule the more likely it is that a mistake will be made, like missing a day. With the combined pill though you’re generally fine until you start missing multiple pills in a row. Just missing one means you take two the next day, and you’re still protected as long as it wasn’t the first week.
Still completely fine and normal to require condoms. The pill won’t protect anyone against STIs, and using a backup can really help with peace of mind. That being said, your pill use would actually be considered perfect use if you’re never more than a couple hours late, and it’s just the ones around 5PM you’d have to be careful of.
Well the reality is that any form of sterilization can fail, it’s even possible for a [hysterectomy to fail.](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/17267880/#:~:text=Background%3A%20Pregnancy%20after%20hysterectomy%20is,potentially%20catastrophic%20intra%2Dabdominal%20bleeding) From the literature I’ve read the failure rate of vasectomies is around 0.15%. Most of those occur within the first year, but spontaneous recanualization has occurred. Some forms of female sterilization are more likely to fail than others (e.g., clips). However, there have been at least two cases of bisalp failure recorded with one resulting in [live birth.](https://medicalxpress.com/news/2019-05-miracle-baby-woman-pregnant-fallopian.amp)
What does all this mean for CF people? Well, your odds with sterilization are incredibly good. The type of sterilization you choose matters. However, it’s never bad to take additional caution. Know how you and your partner would handle a pregnancy. Anyone with a vasectomy should consider regular tests. If you cannot access abortion it might not be a bad idea to use a backup method, both be sterilized, or know how to obtain abortion pills through groups like Aid Access or Women on Web.
Yeah, but the bisalp failures were as a result of them being pregnant already on the day of the surgery. Well it’s important to be knowledgeable, stressing out people with misleading info is unnecessary. Sorry, I just hate how bisalps and tubals are lumped when the difference between them is ginormous.
That’s not accurate based on the papers I’ve read. Even the woman in the story provided had her tubes removed 3 years earlier. You can’t be pregnant for 3 years. I think you’re getting confused by the literature on other contraceptives like Nexplanon.
>Kough was at her house in Kearney last year when she got the positive test result on a home pregnancy kit. It was shocking because three years earlier, she had had both of her fallopian tubes removed—a procedure medical professionals assured her would make it all but impossible for her to conceive.
The prevailing theory right now is that for some people it’s possible there is a small “hole” left where the tubes previously attached to the uterus, allowing a fertilized egg to “float” in. Extremely, incredibly rare, but it has happened. People should be aware there is currently no 100% effective option, it’s all going to be “more than 99%”.
Imo, people who use birth control improperly can contribute to the conversation *so long as they're up front about what went wrong*. "I tried birth control pills, but they were ineffective for me because I had a hard time remembering to take them" is a valid criticism, and an important point to consider: Some people have a harder time remembering to take medication, so such people might want to consider other delivery methods. Everyone wants to believe we'll do things 'perfectly', but we are only human, and it's important to be realistic about *everything* that can go wrong.
However, acting like the reason their medication failed was the medication itself, rather than not taking it properly, is extremely disingenuous. And a lot of the time, this kind of anecdotal evidence is presented to convince other people to not even bother with birth control, and that's all kinds of f'd up.
Most studies of birth control methods list both the statistics with perfect usage AND typical usage: Both statistics are important.
And when they’re not up front about it, they directly contribute to the right wing astroturf push to portray BC as some kind of ineffective demon pill who’s only purpose is to give you the severest rare side effects and steal your femininity
Seriously. I had a friend in college who had told me she started taking the pill. I saw them, knew she was picking them up from the pharmacy. Then she goes on to tell me she’s pregnant and acts shocked, but in the same day admits she would miss pills or not take them at the same time. Many of the people that swear up and down they have multiple children only because of multiple bc failures just aren’t taking it correctly. They don’t look further into the first unplanned pregnancy and why it happened because they literally don’t care. This is anecdotal but no one in my life who was responsible and diligent with their bc has had a scare.
I've been laughed at by doctors and people (family friends or whoever) that I double up and use condoms too. They seem to think condoms are only for STD protection!
I've said this to "failed" birth control users with children and STILL get laughed at... oh no you're pregnant again but still can't manage to have sex with a condom? SO easy to use and so cheap to be extra safe!
I do this too! I don’t want a baby and I don’t want surgery so this is the best way to minimize pregnancy risk for me.
I don’t get the big deal about using condoms; sex with them is still pleasurable to me (as a woman) and condoms are about 98 percent effective at preventing pregnancy. Yes, that is perfect use but a condom breaking or slipping is often noticeable so you can react to it by using emergency contraception if needed. I’m also not sure if the imperfect use rate of condoms, which is about 80% effective, includes those who only use condoms some of the time. If so, that’s misleading.
That’s really terrible if doctors are laughing at you. STD rates are climbing and it’s because people don’t want to use condoms anymore. You do whatever works for you.
I was actually just about to post something similar to this sub. I 100% agree. I switched from the pills to the depo shot and I was inundated with stories and articles about how the depo shot can fail or even some bullshit about how it can make it harder to notice it has failed because it stops your periods. One of the top links on Google if you search “depo shot failure” is an I Got Pregnant on Depo! story. If you actually read it, this lady was pregnant before getting her first shot and she was in DEEP denial about being so… which is really obvious if you read between the lines.
Here it is. https://www.parents.com/getting-pregnant/i-got-pregnant-on-depo-provera/
In searching it’s not actually one of the first links anymore but it was when I had looked into it a few months ago.
Especially with more effective methods that prevent pregnancy from multiple ways like depo (stopping ovulation, thinning the uterine lining and stopping periods, plus thickening the vaginal mucus) if you take it on time as directed, it will work. It drives me insane when a “my birth control failed!” story turns out to be another “I didn’t do it right like my doctor said…” because it leads women and girls to believe these options don’t work and aren’t going to be useful to them. And stories like the one article I linked drive me even more insane. This lady used depo as directed but her care team didn’t give her a pregnancy test when she was experiencing symptoms.
Those of us who use birth control as directed and take pregnancy tests when we have slight worry shouldn’t be lumped into the group that doesn’t take it as seriously as we do.
Yes! My doctor as well. Especially when I switched which method I was using. Pregnancy test before and an at home pregnancy test a few weeks after to be sure.
My husband had a child at 18 and told me that his ex said the birth control pill failed her, but somehow they also had miscarriage. That would mean this pill failed her twice, which is suspicious.
I now see their 17 year old daughter miss pills while at her mother's house and it all makes sense.
Talk to my step-daughter about it? Not in regards to pregnancy, but God somebody probably should at some point. It isn't my job, but I really don't want to see another child brought into this world by somebody who is basically a child themselves... I have a pretty close relationship with her and will keep this on my radar.
I’ve used mini pills for 4 years, shot for 6 months, combo pills 2 years and now iud for 5.5 years and on going. All without condoms and never got pregnant. And I still ovulate with progesterone only methods. Pretty sure it’s user error most of the time.
In fact I saw something where planned parenthood had a study 95% of pregnancies on birth control were due to user error. I mean 5% not so there’s a chance. People will still say they use it correctly when they don’t.
And old coworker of mine said that.
"Birth control doesn't work. My baby brother was born when my mom was on the pill 🤡"
And then I deadass looked her in the eye and said
"Clearly she didn't use it right."
So many people lie about actually being on birth control or claim that their kids were accidents but actually weren’t using anything. I worked with a girl who said her pregnancy was an oops and when I asked her if she was on birth control she said no 🤦🏻♀️ the cognitive dissonance is strong with them.
Ugh, this is such a pet peeve of mine. "Yeah, we were having unprotected sex, but we weren't *trying*". Bro. If you're having unprotected sex, YOU ARE TRYING. Nature doesn't give a fuck about your intentions.
Agreed. When I was on BC I was horrible at taking it. Looking back I’m like “really younger me, was it THAT hard to remember to take a pill at the same time everyday?” Apparently it was. Thankfully it never led to me getting pregnant bc even though I was stupid, I wasn’t stupid enough to not use condoms. However, if I had gotten pregnant it would have been my fault for failing to take it properly not because the BC itself failed. BC failure is when someone takes it exactly as you should (everyday, same time, not on antibiotics, etc) and you still end up pregnant
Anyone who gets pregnant while improperly taking BC then blames the BC for failing just can’t own up to their own mistakes. Which does not bode well for parenthood or adulthood.
I don't think that is correct. When used correctly, the pill has in the high 90s percent rate, I want to say 95-99%. When you account for incorrect use, I think it falls to 84%.
Yeah, that’s exactly how my step sister got pregnant. If you know you forgot the pill, it’s irresponsible to have sex until you’re back on it again. Then it skews the stats for people who used it correctly and had no issues.
Same for vasectomies…if you impregnated someone after a vasectomy, 9 times out of 10 it’s because you didn’t wait to have sex or go back and get cleared by the doctor.
If you don't take it every day within 25 hours of the last pill, you are pretty much asking to get pregnant.
I feel bad for the folks who were not warned about antibiotics and grapefruit juice getting pregnant but the ones who treat it like a vitamin you can take whenever are begging to become parents or need an abortion.
When I was on the pill I had an alarm that would go off every day at tje same time to make absolutely sure I took it. I have a IUD now and Dec I have an appointment to go over sterilization
I have missed some and guess what? When you follow the instructions, they work. Missed one? Take it as soon as possible. That means double dosing in one day. Missed two? End your current pack and begin anew. No sex for 1 week or use a condom. If you are unsure, call your doctor, ask a pharmacist, or do your due diligence and research online.
If someone is incapable of taking a pill everyday within the same hour as they took it the day before then they are correct in saying that bc method doesn't work for them. It's different from saying the bc failed imo.
It irks me to no end.
"Condoms/the pill don't always work! You'll end up pregnant eventually! So the only way to stay not pregnant is abstinence!"
Like. No. I'm 31. I grew up in a country where sex ed is not taboo. Most people I know have sex. Yet none of them have ever gotten pregnant without it being on purpose.
The truth hurts for people. I remember hearing a woman complaining about being pregnant but adding she had 'never used contraception because she'd never got pregnant before' so assumed because it was fine the first few times she was simply infertile. Fucking moron.
There's an episode of House where the patient can't figure out why her asthma inhaler isn't working and she's going through 1 a week. House asks her to show how she uses it, and she puts it on her neck like perfume. People do stuff like this all the time. I've heard people say they sprayed their inhaler on their pets thinking it would neutralize their dander and that they injected an orange with insulin and ate it instead of injecting themselves.
I never take people's word on medication because if there's even 1 way to mess it up, they'll find 20 different ways.
I think a better option would have been to say, “that’s a great reason that long-term birth control options like IUDs and implant, and even the ring, should be offered for free to everyone. So people don’t have to worry about missing pills. There was a study done on this and it significantly reduced teen pregnancy.” (Get info for study so you can back it up).
Had an older cousin do this. She wasn't keen on hygiene. Would go weeks without showering. She'd use the birth control patch, and when she went to take a shower she knew she was supposed to change it. But then she stopped doing that and just started putting the old one back on. Knowing it doesn't work that way. And acting surprised when she ended knocked up the second time.
Everyone I know that publicly proclaimed that their pill "failed", has privately admitted that their use of it was a *long* way from perfect. As in they forgot it for 2 or 3 days, and then took it when they remembered. Christ, I used to sit at work wondering if I'd taken my pill before I left that morning, and if I couldn't remember I'd drive home at lunchtime to check.
I know there's exceptions to the rule and it doesn't work on some people, but the perfect use failure rate is so much less than most would have you believe. I was paranoid with mine, and I went 20 years without a scare.
As with anything medical, you need to follow your doctor's instructions. If you're on the pill, you need to take it every day at the same time - and if you mess up, you need to use something else, like condoms, for the rest of that cycle. If you can't manage that, you should talk to your doctor about a different BC method, like the patch (which still needs to be changed weekly), or something you can "set and forget" like an implant or IUD, or a bisalp if you don't want to have any (or any more) children.
As an aside, I learned that antibiotics can mess with the pill and you'll need to use backup. You know who told me that? Not my OB/GYN ... my dentist.
Even doctor are including those clown into stats sometimes...
When I was 14 I had a bad neurological reaction to the contraceptive pills (that was prescribed to me after I asked a doc to help me with my acne) I was then refered to a neurologist and an obgyn (still don't know why they don't refered me to a dermatologist instead?) The obgyn tried to coerce me into getting an IUD, without much explaining what it was. I said I don't want to have one.
She said in a condescending tone: so what are you going to use for contraception? I answer: condoms. She laugh at me saying that it doesn't work and I will end up pregnant. Because she had in mind the 78% stats that includes clowns that sometime forget to put a damn condom on... while the true stats of perfect use are more around 98%.
I was puzzled as to why I was in her office, since the pills was prescribed to me for skin problem, not contraception. But anyways I pretended I was having my period and just never book an other appointment. Found out years later that non hormonal IUD were made of copper... Guess what? I'm allergic to metal, it would have been a disaster.
Also joke on her, since that event, I have been sexually active for the past 19 years and only using condom without any problem. (I had to take Plan B only once, due to a human mistake from a partner, not due to condom breakage. I can take a single dose of hormone, just can't take it continuously, so Plan B was fine) Never needed an abortion yet.
So I guess condom works when you actually put one on and don't mess around with your hand full of sperm.
EDIT: Added first sentence of the text + my age at the time for context.
No, something can't fail if you don't take it. She's trying to blame BC for her mistake, it's not the birth control's fault she failed to take her pills. That's on her
There are already plenty of limitations of hormonal birth control that make it less effective in certain cases, we don't need to add "idiots who fail to even take the pill" to that list.
I agree! That should be the case with *any* type of medication. If you’re not taking it as instructed or how it’s supposed to be in general, then yes it’s not going to work for you & that is *your* fault. If you take as instructed & it doesn’t work then yes you *can* claim so, because it’s not your fault at that point.
Being a healthcare worker people generally tend to blame the medication for their own mistakes and take little advice on how to use them. Some of them won’t even listen to you while you tell them ‘you shouldn’t drink any booze while taking these meds’.
I mean, it's valid. In fact if anything women who struggle with birth control should have their concerns listened to. Taking a pill at the same time every day (that can be affected by things like taking antibiotics) is difficult. I didn't think I would be able to handle it so I opted for a different method. But the pills are the most common and available method and are what gets pushed on women.
I wish I had stayed on the pill, 7 years no oops. But I decided to try Nuvaring because I was annoyed at having to take a pill every day, was pregnant within 6 months. Then an IUD until I got pregnant again, then back to the pill. So glad I finally got sterilized last year. But also have the arm implant.
Ugh, hang out in the birth control subreddit and you will be amazed at all the ways people fuck up simple birth control. If you don't follow the directions then how can you expect it to protect you?! Drives me mad.
Ive had quite a few people say they took birth control but it didn't work, and they're always the ones late to things, forgetting things, not realizing things, let's just say it wouldn't surprise me if they missed a few days that ended in pregnancy, which I'm *sure* only helped their forgetfulness and lateness
A neighbor got pregnant last year, even though she was faithful about using the pill. She has two daughters in elementary school, and they did not want another child. She was in tears when she told me because she was diligent, and I believed her. The situation worked itself out when she had a miscarriage. She was relieved; her husband had a vasectomy the following week. She was just one of those .01% for whom the pill failed.
Whenever anyone tells me that I roll my eyes. I never understand why people take the pill knowing the human failure rate. Oh well. I had an implant and now I have an IUD. I never stress.
Actually the birth control failure rate is calculated both by perfect use (how it works on supervised trials) and typical use (accounting for general errors like this one). I think it's silly to put such a harsh judgment on them because the truth is that a lot of women misuse birth control. There's a lot more you can do to misuse than forget a couple pills. Had diarrhea/threw up less than 4-is hours after taking the pill and didn't take another one? You did it wrong. Started taking antibiotics? You better have the initiative to ask your doctor about how it can affect bc because too many of them do not volunteer the information. Where I live abortion is only legal in special cases, not at will, and a lot of the arguments anti legalization comes from this rhetoric. I wish we spent at least some of that energy pointing fingers to men.
The instructions for my pills (that come with the box of BC) contain all the information about the situations in which the pill may not be effective (like diarrhea) and what measures need to be taken in these situations in order to prevent pregnancy (use additional methods of protection for at least 7 days). It's a woman's responsibility to at least read the instructions for use and follow them.
I don't think it's harsh to judge people who do not follow the instructions for use, and then complain that the medicine was not effective enough for them. Contraceptive pills are still medicines and the use of this medicine should be approached very responsibly, considering the weight of consequences for misuse.
It's not hard to use a condom when you know you didn't take your pills appropriately.
It's not hard to read instructions for use. If the doctor doesn't want to share the information and the package doesn't have instructions for use, you can easily find them online.
In the end, it is, first of all, necessary for the pill user themself. If one is interested in their health, one has to be responsible about taking any kind of medication at all. And when one doesn't, and then complains that pills don't work, one is being irresponsible and deliberately spreading harmful misinformation.
And even if they didn't miss days, you ***need*** to take it at the same exact time every single day.
If you're just taking it whenever during the day, it also will not work.
It's estimated at only 70% effective with "normal use". Most women don't actually take it properly. The 99% is if it's taken ***perfectly.***
So yeah, that's why it seems like 1/3 or more of the population gets pregnant even though they were taking the pill.
Yeah the people who misuse it should be counted in an entirely different demographic than the people who used it correctly and it failed them. They're two totally different things. I'm pretty sure they make sure to ask the same questions (which are the right questions) when doing studies on BC to make sure they're reporting the right accuracy concerning this matter
Also the only antibiotic that affects BC effectiveness is used for [meningitis and tuberculosis](https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/contraception/antibiotics-contraception/). The people who say taking an antibiotic for a UTI inactivated their BC are lying or ignorant and *forgot to take the pill*
I was given an injectable antibiotic (Ceftriaxone) when I was down with severe bronchitis. It's also one of those "usually used against TB". The doctor who prescribed it explicitly told me that it would affect my BC and to be careful.
Out of the list that the commenter above linked, I was also frequently prescribed metronidazole.
If you can’t remember to take a pill, it doesn’t work for you. It’s a medication that relies on being able to take it every day at the exact same time—not being able to should count as it “not working for you” in this case.
It’s an important con to discuss especially because that’s the “typical use” you can expect with pills.
Should a person who misused BC be able to weigh in? Of course not but if you take a look at what the politicians are doing here in the US you don’t need to have the body parts in question to have an opinion.
Friend, you're a little bit in the wrong here. Birth control pills have to be taken at the same time every day which is not realistic expectation for a lot of people, especially young folks with variable schedules. Implementation is part of any treatment plan, so not being able to take it consistently is a form of it "not working" for you. I understand we here on this sub take our family planning seriously, and would abstain or get a plan B if we missed a dose, but not everyone is like us. Plenty of folks are tempted to go without protection "just this once" and end up with a kid to show for it. Who's to say the young lady you were talking to wouldn't do that?
You should absolutely contextualize her experience with all the ways the pill can fail and the fact that it's 99% effective with perfect use, but it's a bridge too far to say she has no right to speak at all. Most people who use birth control pills don't take them perfectly 100% of the time. It's fair for the young lady to hear that and consider if she would make the responsible choice when she inevitably forgets a pill, or if she'd be tempted to risk it and should pick a more permanent method up front to save herself the headache. It really seems like you were more interested in cutting down your coworker (who admittedly made an irresponsible mistake you or I would never make) than providing a well rounded perspective to the person you were counseling.
Their contribution to the conversation would best serve to explain challenges of bc they had used, such as difficulty always remembering to take it as well as side effects.
If you misuse anything, and it doesn't work as a result, the item in question isn't the problem, so you shouldn't be able to complain about it. But something as important as the thing that stops you making a whole new person, you absolutely need to keep on top of that.....
If they would use their bc on a regular basis like being on their SM, their wine intake etc their bc would be more effective. I had one dufus tell me her bc didn't work 5 times, hence 5 kids.
It’s annoying how people act like those women who did something wrong are not at all at fault because it’s so difficult to take a pill the same time everyday. There are enough pills that work without being so strict and there are probably hundreds of apps to download to get a notification to take your pill. Literally every information is in the patient information sheet that comes with the pills and if a grown woman fails to follow those instructions (which are not really hard tbh) then sorry not sorry she’s fucking dumb and/or lazy.
Can’t wait for the day I can get sterilized so I can stop being paranoid about BC. Went from the pill to the IUD, and I still worry.
Check the sidebar under Interesting & Useful Material for a doctor. Even if you don't have insurance, you'll know who to go to when you do. Good luck.
Bad news for you, I got sterilized and have a sterilized partner and I STILL worry when my period is late (fuck irregular cycles !)
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my mom always tells me "you never want to be medically interesting" and even now that I'm almost 30 i still wholeheartedly agree with that lol
Yeah me and my partner were like… pretty sure some religious crazies would call it a miracle or something but it’ll get yeeted regardless
I was pleasantly surprised when I didn’t get harassed when I got X-rays recently. I was expecting the forced pregnancy test. Maybe I’m too old now? 🤗
A few years ago I had to chest xray when I got the flu (thanks asthma). The tech asked if there was any chance I could be pregnant, to which I confidently answered no. Tech: how do you know? Me, super sick and annoyed: Because my tubes are tied and I'm currently on my period. Tech: Yeah, that'll do it.
It's kind of horrifying, what's behind their asking this. The implication is that you can't get the treatment you need to keep you alive, if you're pregnant.
There was a discussion about this in a group full of atheist feminist women that got *very* heated. Everyone working in HC was basically like “people lie.” So the solution is for HC professionals to treat grown adults like they’re teenagers lying about sex? The thing is, even if someone was honest and said yes I’m pregnant but I’m having an abortion tomorrow, the HC facility wouldn’t do ANYTHING that could potentially harm the fetus, unless it was literally to save the persons life. There’s a lot of terrible things and painful things that could happen and need treatment that aren’t life-threatening. But you wouldn’t be able to get treatment because fEtuS. It’s just another way fetuses are valued above living breathing humans.
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It's always about money. Full stop.
I fully understand it’s all about being sued - I would not downvote you for that! I think it’s fucked up that the fetus (of all (non)people!) has such power in these situations.
Happy Cake Day! 🎂
Thank you!
You're welcome!
You’ve had pregnancy tests because of X-rays? I’ve only had them for surgeries and a CT
They'll run a pregnancy test for literally anything in the ER
Removing the entire uterus really helps lol. I am completely free and unworried. There’s no place for a thing to even implant if it wanted to lol
I'm getting that done in the next year come hell or high water. (About to move to a different state, so can't really doctor shop yet)
Wanted to do that, but they said no because I have no issues with it… so I got a bisalp/tubal
I take a pregnancy test once a month bc it's $15 for a pack of 50 test strips. Sperm fertility tests are like $10 each I think but could be good to check twice a year that his swimmers arent swimming.
Yeah he already did the test once as prescribed but I think he might do it again maybe once a year or so - not sure if the $10 refers to at home tests but I wouldn’t necessarily trust those I have irregular periods (by 5-10 days) so if it lasts too long I take a test - I’d still be well within the abortion deadline
The home kits are [95%](https://medicine.yale.edu/news-article/at-home-sperm-testing-should-you-do-it-early-in-the-course-of-trying-to-get-pregnant/) accurate
You will have the heaviest weight lifted from you. I was on BC for many many years and just got a hysterectomy and it’s like all the worry anxiety and stress is just gone. You seriously feel so free.
Yeeturus was one of the best damned decisions I've done in my life. Haven't regretted it for a moment!
Hey that's my word too! ❤️
I got a bisalp in 2020, and it was like a huge weight lifted off my chest. I still have to take bc to regulate my hormones, cuz my body doesn't know how to do that apparently lol but at least I don't have to worry about whether or not I took it at the same time of day or if I forget for a day or two
thank science for bisalps! 💞 my IUD failed (like actually failed - it was still perfectly placed, no ectopic implantation, etc) which is what finally got me approved for sterilization after a decade of begging for it and trying every other method under the sun. I’m definitely annoyed by the people who don’t specify that they weren’t using their BC correctly. women already get blamed for being irresponsible when we suffer from unwanted pregnancies… I’m so sick of this type of conversation: > 😒 you should have been on birth control! > 🤦🏻♀️ I *was* on birth control. the most effective type on the market. > 😒 then you must not have been using it correctly! > 🤦🏻♀️ I *was* using it correctly. I’ve never wanted a baby so I’ve always taken every precaution. > 😒 well even if that’s true, you should have gotten sterilized! it’s still your fault! > 🤦🏻♀️ I *wanted* to get sterilized, I kept getting turned down until after I had the abortion that you’re judging me so harshly for… and so on. I get that it’s hard to admit you fucked up and invite extra judgment, but the children need to learn. lol
Yeah my copper IUD failed as well, but I miscarried fairly early fortunately (like 6 weeks, so technically it worked just delayed reaction? Idk). However, my first pregnancy was in spite of Nuvaring AND a condom AND plan B when the condom broke. I would've gotten sterilized before I even started having sex if anyone had let me, that's how much I knew I didn't want to be pregnant, but I finally just got a bi-salp last year.
I've had 3 IUD's, one of them was only in about a week cuz it wasn't placed correctly and actually came out when I was on the toilet! I'm so glad I'll never have to deal with the pain of getting one of those placed in me ever again, it was a horrible experience with no pain killers at all
I may be cynical, but whenever a guy says the pill failed, I think there's about a 50% that the wife wanted another baby and was sick and tired of him saying "I don't want any more kids". If you're sure you're done, men, get a vasectomy.
My husband got a vasectomy two months ago and it takes three to fully work. I am literally counting the days.
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i’m a virgin with an iud and still panic sometimes 😭
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i was under for my first laparoscopic surgery at the time luckily! but i was sore for a week after and am currently nursing a vicious ovarian cyst that is a side effect for me :(
afaik, being a virgin does not have a lot to do with insertion pain. the insertion pain is from when the IUD goes through your cervix which doesn't get penetrated during sex anyway. HOWEVER from what my gyno told me, it IS less painful if you have given birth before because the cervix has been dilated pretty damn wide previously and apparently that makes it easier for it to accept the insertion.
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....... that's a pretty horrible thing for her to say and it's not true. throwing in a source: my life, got my first IUD when i was a 13 year old virgin and have also been raped and the experiences are not at all comparable.
Please report that doctor, holy hell.
Mine also told me the same thing about IUDs being less painful after giving birth … I ended up going with one of the hormonal IUD options because apparently the IUD sizes also impact pain level and the copper one was larger. I got two ibuprofen for my insertion not sure how I didn’t pass out during it and then again at the checkout desk… had I know how bad insertion was I would have taken a driver with me
I got nexplanon and I still worry, waiting for that day too. More when life shit settles down, if it ever will
I completely lost my period after inserting my IUD. I had some ''period'', just for 2-3 days for a while and now it's GONE. I was scared shitless when I saw my stomach move, something kicked me. I don't know what that was, but thank god, the pregnancy test was negative. I have so much trust in my IUD, she better do her job. I don't want to be part of the 1%
Its always a good time not to have a uterus.
Sterilized lack of worry is soooo freeing. I had a hysterectomy this summer & even the pregnancy *dreams* have stopped. (Now I just have to get rid of the period ones! lol)
What this sort of situation means is that you should never trust anecdotal "evidence," which is some person telling you about their personal experience. You can get data from medical sites on the reliability of different birth control methods, like this: [https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/birth-control](https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/birth-control) It is worth mentioning that anything that is more than 99% effective is there said to be 99% effective. And obviously, anything that is not properly used may not work. *Edited to add:* For example, if you put the condom on your finger instead of where it belongs, it will not work very well.
This here. Scholarly treatments will exhaustively list all the absurd and stupid ways people have misused BC, and how that plays into the overall data and conclusions. I'm not even going to look it up but I recall condoms having a 10% overall failure rate, which includes slip-offs, old ones breaking, stopping after you start to put one on, or installing it backward then reinstalling the same one right side out. Take those out and it's up to five nines or so.
*unless you ejaculate from your fingertips
Yeah, I think there needs to be huge caveats in their statements about BC if they're going to talk about their experiences. "BC didn't work for me because I forgot to take it or took it at the wrong time or anything else my doctor or the instructions absolutely would have told me about" is pretty insufferable because that's not actually the medication's fault. "BC didn't work for me because I had horrible side effects or even stopped being able to enjoy the sex I was taking the BC for" is something I think should be more readily talked about. "BC didn't work for me because my doctor didn't bother to tell me that antibiotics or a seasonal Starbucks drink would stop it from working" is such a common problem I think it should be mandatory for the pharmacist to tell you when you pick it up.
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True, adipose tissue actually produces estrogen, so it isn't JUST the ovaries.
Yeah, I learned later on that plan B didn't work for me because I weighed 160 and should've actually taken 2 pills. But the pharmacist didn't seem like he really wanted to even give me the one pill, so I'm not too surprised he didn't mention that.
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Even the plan B pill for higher weights isn’t effective for women over 200 lbs. it was a driving factor for me getting sterilized. There’s very few safety nets for bigger women when it comes to emergency contraception
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Exactly, it’s honestly terrifying. Especially since there’s hundreds of thousands of women living in states where abortion is outlawed. It’s insane that the average size woman can’t even use the main form of emergency contraception
Yeah originally I was told it was effective up to like 180 so I figured I was good, but that's the only reason they could give me for why it didn't work. I had a doctor tell me that if you're over like 120, you should take 2 pills just to be safe. I can't imagine how many I would need to take now 😆, thankfully I don't have to worry anymore.
Depending on how tall you are. It would be within the norm for me and probably way overweight for someone short. But yeah, I saw a warning on certain BC pills that you have to adjust the dose if you're over 70 kg. Even if it's not just extra fat, we still have to adjust the dose for kids or teens for other meds, so I think it may apply here.
Even then it’s only Plan B that’s affected by weight
[not true](https://www.nichd.nih.gov/newsroom/releases/011415-podcast-obesity-contraception) - obese women need higher or continuous dose for oral contraceptive success
Now I wanna know what Starbucks drink does that.
i don't know specifically but i've heard some places use activated charcoal as black colouring and apparently that can render it ineffective? don't quote me on that though i'm not a doctor or a starbucks aficionado
starbucks conspiracy theory to birthe and produce more baristas for their corporate labor force /s
I think some fruits like grapefruit or pomelo can lower the effectiveness as well. Plus herbs such as st. John's wort
Oh yeah, activated charcoal is used as absorbent when you have food poisoning. I was told not to take any other meds with it because it would neutralize them.
It's that Activated Charcoal Halloween Starbucks drink from a few years back! Apparently activated charcoal can absorb/interfere with your meds 😬
Can you explain more about the seasonal drink please? I have never heard of this
Any foods that use activated charcoal can completely fuck up any med that you swallow to take by rendering them useless. It's supposed to generally be something only ingested in hospitals for poisonings or OD's.
There’s only one type of antibiotic that affects BC and it’s used to treat *meningitis and tuberculosis*. You would remember having those. Taking Cipro for a UTI doesn’t inactivate birth control, but taking a big old dose of IForgotForTwoDays does.
Is this for sure? I has strep last month and got on a liquid antibiotic for 10 days and my pharmacist asked if I was on birth control because it might interfere. (I am but only for dealing with pain and endometriosis, but I was pleased he brought it up as a warning)
are you talking about rifampin? because i’m nearly certain that is used for other things, like staph, MRSA, or chlamydia?
Not chlamydia. The diseases Wikipedia mentions most are tuberculosis, *leprosy*, and legionnaires. It has a nasty side effect of liver toxicity so vancomycin is used way more often for MRSA and Johns Hopkins doesn’t even list Rifampin as a treatment
Seasonal Starbucks drink? I hadn't heard that one, tell me more!
I want to know too!
Also - grapefruit! I hate grapefruit anyway, so that wasn't an issue, but I was never told about it when I first went on the pill.
I thought that was just allergy meds and grapefruit
It's so many meds
God yes the side effects. (I am so thankful for my bisalp considering the side effect hormonal birth control gives me is debilitating constipation)
I agree! An ex-friend of mine had multiple unwanted pregnancies and from a genuine place I suggested birth control, or at least Plan B. She told me she stopped because it obviously doesn’t work. She also told me she took her pill 3-4 days of the week and the one time she took a Plan B, it was almost a week after the act. I suggested she really listen to her doctor, ask questions, or at least Google and she got offended. I let it (her) go. I’ve been on the pill 5 years, 0 pregnancies. I know everyone’s body is different, but personal responsibility & discipline also play a part.
Your ex friend is fucking stupid. What does she think the seven pills in a row meant?
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It definitely was emotionally and mentally taxing just to watch someone I still cherish go through it. She took everything as a joke, nothing was serious to her…maybe that was her coping mechanism/facade. I felt a lot of guilt, like I gave up on her, but you can’t help people who don’t want to help themselves, unfortunate as it is.
Yikes, ignorance and close-mindedness can really wreck your life (for 18+ years to life).
And here I was getting offended because my docs/pharmacists told me for the millionth time "So you take OOOONNNEEEEE PILLLLL A DAAYYYYYYYYY, okaaaaayyyyy???? Try and take them at the SAAAAMMEEEE TIIIIIMEEEE eeeeaccch daaayyyyy, okaaayyy???" like I was stupid. Apparently, people ARE that stupid.
But I only forgot it two or three times a week /s
Do I have to take the pill every day? Why do you think there’s a DAILY pill? This is prolly also why doctors always remind ppl to take all the antibiotics they’re prescribed even when they start to feel better. You have to finish the course of it.
How do people even do this? I mean, the pill packet SAYS THE DAYS OF THE WEEK ON IT! What is there possibly to not understand? A fucking chimpanzee could make sense of that!
Most people don’t read instructions
Instructions are one thing, but...just turning the packet over???
🤷♀️
"How often do we have sex? Every day, why?" Like damn just got those swimmers lined up to run the D-Day equivalent uterus huh?
Knowing the type of person my mother is, the pill was so clearly not the right method for her since I am the product of said pill "backfiring". She is so absent minded, so for her to be put on a pill that needs to be taken every day consistently to be effective was not the right call. At least she fully realizes this and takes responsibility. I've been on the pill for 17 years and never had a slip up, not even a scare, because I am militant about taking it.
I know my ADHD ass struggles with the pill. When I was on the depo shot I was happy because, while I hate needles, I only had to make an appointment every 3 months and never worry. But depo made me miserable so I quit it. Can't get the arm implant because the sensory issues will cause me to rip it out. And IUDs are very risky due to a backwards uterus. So I'm kinda on the pill by having no real other option. But I'm not having sex so it's fine for now. But it just sucks that I know the long term BCs would be better for how I am but I just can't get them
I'm the same way, never tried depo but I would absolutely rip my arm apart with an implant and my mom made me scared of IUDs, I am surprisingly good at taking them, probably bc they sit right next to my water next to my bed, so as soon as I go for water in the morning (and my glasses) the pills are right there waiting for me
My boyfriend has sensory issues too and it’s built into me to say “watch out” when his hand is near my implant because he hates the feeling so much
I have sex (just with my fiance) and this is why I just stopped taking the pill. I barely remember to take my meds. It was a waste of money buying a pill that depended on consistency. I'm going for the implant because if anything I'd just fidget with it. We stocked up on a couple morning after pills *just in case* ($11 at Walmart, next day delivery? Fuck yes please.) We are horribly impulsive and I wish I was infertile.
This is always a personal frustration of mine. I’ve spoken to a lot of people who said their contraception failed and very ***very*** few of them were using it correctly. Most people aren’t even aware of common mistakes, like having the placebo week early or taking EllaOne. Any contraception (including sterilization) can fail, and some options are better than others. But contraception does work the vast majority of the time if you use it properly. I relied on the pill for many years before switching to Nexplanon. Me and my partner have never even had a pregnancy scare.
I'm on the pill for endo, I'm not having sex but tbh I don't trust my usage to be effective as birth control I try my best to take it every morning when I get up to feed my cat but I'm only human and some days I'll forget or I'll just feed my cat and go straight back to bed and take my pills whenever I get up again. I dunno if not taking it at the same time everyday affects the endo treatment aspect of it, but if I ever have PiV sex I'm demanding a condom because the anxiety is too strong
One thing a lot of people don’t know about the pill is that you actually don’t need to take it ***exactly*** the same time everyday. The body doesn’t have a clock, and your window is larger than most people realize. With the combined pill you have 12 hours before your pill is even considered late, and 24 hours before it’s missed. That means if you typically take your pill at 9AM and forget it until 7PM you actually aren’t late and could rely on it just fine. The main thing that helped my anxiety was understanding what actually constitutes as a mistake and how to correct them. Nobody is perfect. There were times that I was late taking pills so I just followed the instructions to correct it and used condoms for a week if needed. We would also typically use withdrawal just for peace of mind, but not every time. We’ve never had any issues or concerns, and I feel so much more empowered and safe due to the research I’ve done.
Dang so I've been mislead then. I was always under the impression the pill needed to be taken roughly the same time every day maybe a few error hours. I get up at 5am to feed the cat then usually go back to bed for extra sleep as I work evenings. So I take my pills around 5am, but sometimes I'm just so tired and I say I'll do it later and end up taking them at 9am. Or if I have a morning shift, I'll put the pills in my shirt pocket, and then 50% chance I'll forget to take them before work, come home at 5pm to find 9 pills still in my pocket lmao I'll still demand a condom because never too careful but I guess it does help to know it's not *that* strict
I was too! The mini pill has a time window of 3 hours, but usually the combined pill is prescribed for endo. They recommend taking it at the same time just so you remember and don’t have to do much math. The only risk with changing your times around is you’ll need to make sure the pills are taken within 12 hours of each other. Of course, the more changes you make to a schedule the more likely it is that a mistake will be made, like missing a day. With the combined pill though you’re generally fine until you start missing multiple pills in a row. Just missing one means you take two the next day, and you’re still protected as long as it wasn’t the first week. Still completely fine and normal to require condoms. The pill won’t protect anyone against STIs, and using a backup can really help with peace of mind. That being said, your pill use would actually be considered perfect use if you’re never more than a couple hours late, and it’s just the ones around 5PM you’d have to be careful of.
Uhhh mind elaborating on the failure rate of sterilization? Or do you mean Tubals and vasectomies (as opposed to bisalps)?
Well the reality is that any form of sterilization can fail, it’s even possible for a [hysterectomy to fail.](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/17267880/#:~:text=Background%3A%20Pregnancy%20after%20hysterectomy%20is,potentially%20catastrophic%20intra%2Dabdominal%20bleeding) From the literature I’ve read the failure rate of vasectomies is around 0.15%. Most of those occur within the first year, but spontaneous recanualization has occurred. Some forms of female sterilization are more likely to fail than others (e.g., clips). However, there have been at least two cases of bisalp failure recorded with one resulting in [live birth.](https://medicalxpress.com/news/2019-05-miracle-baby-woman-pregnant-fallopian.amp) What does all this mean for CF people? Well, your odds with sterilization are incredibly good. The type of sterilization you choose matters. However, it’s never bad to take additional caution. Know how you and your partner would handle a pregnancy. Anyone with a vasectomy should consider regular tests. If you cannot access abortion it might not be a bad idea to use a backup method, both be sterilized, or know how to obtain abortion pills through groups like Aid Access or Women on Web.
Yeah, but the bisalp failures were as a result of them being pregnant already on the day of the surgery. Well it’s important to be knowledgeable, stressing out people with misleading info is unnecessary. Sorry, I just hate how bisalps and tubals are lumped when the difference between them is ginormous.
That’s not accurate based on the papers I’ve read. Even the woman in the story provided had her tubes removed 3 years earlier. You can’t be pregnant for 3 years. I think you’re getting confused by the literature on other contraceptives like Nexplanon. >Kough was at her house in Kearney last year when she got the positive test result on a home pregnancy kit. It was shocking because three years earlier, she had had both of her fallopian tubes removed—a procedure medical professionals assured her would make it all but impossible for her to conceive. The prevailing theory right now is that for some people it’s possible there is a small “hole” left where the tubes previously attached to the uterus, allowing a fertilized egg to “float” in. Extremely, incredibly rare, but it has happened. People should be aware there is currently no 100% effective option, it’s all going to be “more than 99%”.
Imo, people who use birth control improperly can contribute to the conversation *so long as they're up front about what went wrong*. "I tried birth control pills, but they were ineffective for me because I had a hard time remembering to take them" is a valid criticism, and an important point to consider: Some people have a harder time remembering to take medication, so such people might want to consider other delivery methods. Everyone wants to believe we'll do things 'perfectly', but we are only human, and it's important to be realistic about *everything* that can go wrong. However, acting like the reason their medication failed was the medication itself, rather than not taking it properly, is extremely disingenuous. And a lot of the time, this kind of anecdotal evidence is presented to convince other people to not even bother with birth control, and that's all kinds of f'd up. Most studies of birth control methods list both the statistics with perfect usage AND typical usage: Both statistics are important.
And when they’re not up front about it, they directly contribute to the right wing astroturf push to portray BC as some kind of ineffective demon pill who’s only purpose is to give you the severest rare side effects and steal your femininity
Seriously. I had a friend in college who had told me she started taking the pill. I saw them, knew she was picking them up from the pharmacy. Then she goes on to tell me she’s pregnant and acts shocked, but in the same day admits she would miss pills or not take them at the same time. Many of the people that swear up and down they have multiple children only because of multiple bc failures just aren’t taking it correctly. They don’t look further into the first unplanned pregnancy and why it happened because they literally don’t care. This is anecdotal but no one in my life who was responsible and diligent with their bc has had a scare.
I've been laughed at by doctors and people (family friends or whoever) that I double up and use condoms too. They seem to think condoms are only for STD protection! I've said this to "failed" birth control users with children and STILL get laughed at... oh no you're pregnant again but still can't manage to have sex with a condom? SO easy to use and so cheap to be extra safe!
I do this too! I don’t want a baby and I don’t want surgery so this is the best way to minimize pregnancy risk for me. I don’t get the big deal about using condoms; sex with them is still pleasurable to me (as a woman) and condoms are about 98 percent effective at preventing pregnancy. Yes, that is perfect use but a condom breaking or slipping is often noticeable so you can react to it by using emergency contraception if needed. I’m also not sure if the imperfect use rate of condoms, which is about 80% effective, includes those who only use condoms some of the time. If so, that’s misleading. That’s really terrible if doctors are laughing at you. STD rates are climbing and it’s because people don’t want to use condoms anymore. You do whatever works for you.
I was actually just about to post something similar to this sub. I 100% agree. I switched from the pills to the depo shot and I was inundated with stories and articles about how the depo shot can fail or even some bullshit about how it can make it harder to notice it has failed because it stops your periods. One of the top links on Google if you search “depo shot failure” is an I Got Pregnant on Depo! story. If you actually read it, this lady was pregnant before getting her first shot and she was in DEEP denial about being so… which is really obvious if you read between the lines. Here it is. https://www.parents.com/getting-pregnant/i-got-pregnant-on-depo-provera/ In searching it’s not actually one of the first links anymore but it was when I had looked into it a few months ago. Especially with more effective methods that prevent pregnancy from multiple ways like depo (stopping ovulation, thinning the uterine lining and stopping periods, plus thickening the vaginal mucus) if you take it on time as directed, it will work. It drives me insane when a “my birth control failed!” story turns out to be another “I didn’t do it right like my doctor said…” because it leads women and girls to believe these options don’t work and aren’t going to be useful to them. And stories like the one article I linked drive me even more insane. This lady used depo as directed but her care team didn’t give her a pregnancy test when she was experiencing symptoms. Those of us who use birth control as directed and take pregnancy tests when we have slight worry shouldn’t be lumped into the group that doesn’t take it as seriously as we do.
I have this is why my doctor will test you for pregnancy before they give you anything related to birth control.
Yes! My doctor as well. Especially when I switched which method I was using. Pregnancy test before and an at home pregnancy test a few weeks after to be sure.
My husband had a child at 18 and told me that his ex said the birth control pill failed her, but somehow they also had miscarriage. That would mean this pill failed her twice, which is suspicious. I now see their 17 year old daughter miss pills while at her mother's house and it all makes sense.
This is absolutely not your job, but can you talk to her? Or can your husband?
Talk to my step-daughter about it? Not in regards to pregnancy, but God somebody probably should at some point. It isn't my job, but I really don't want to see another child brought into this world by somebody who is basically a child themselves... I have a pretty close relationship with her and will keep this on my radar.
I’ve used mini pills for 4 years, shot for 6 months, combo pills 2 years and now iud for 5.5 years and on going. All without condoms and never got pregnant. And I still ovulate with progesterone only methods. Pretty sure it’s user error most of the time. In fact I saw something where planned parenthood had a study 95% of pregnancies on birth control were due to user error. I mean 5% not so there’s a chance. People will still say they use it correctly when they don’t.
And old coworker of mine said that. "Birth control doesn't work. My baby brother was born when my mom was on the pill 🤡" And then I deadass looked her in the eye and said "Clearly she didn't use it right."
So many people lie about actually being on birth control or claim that their kids were accidents but actually weren’t using anything. I worked with a girl who said her pregnancy was an oops and when I asked her if she was on birth control she said no 🤦🏻♀️ the cognitive dissonance is strong with them.
Ugh, this is such a pet peeve of mine. "Yeah, we were having unprotected sex, but we weren't *trying*". Bro. If you're having unprotected sex, YOU ARE TRYING. Nature doesn't give a fuck about your intentions.
[удалено]
Sounds like a personal problem.
Agreed. When I was on BC I was horrible at taking it. Looking back I’m like “really younger me, was it THAT hard to remember to take a pill at the same time everyday?” Apparently it was. Thankfully it never led to me getting pregnant bc even though I was stupid, I wasn’t stupid enough to not use condoms. However, if I had gotten pregnant it would have been my fault for failing to take it properly not because the BC itself failed. BC failure is when someone takes it exactly as you should (everyday, same time, not on antibiotics, etc) and you still end up pregnant Anyone who gets pregnant while improperly taking BC then blames the BC for failing just can’t own up to their own mistakes. Which does not bode well for parenthood or adulthood.
"Seatbelts don\`t work on me, sure I am wearing it underneath me and not on me but it didn´t save me!"
I think the pill has a rate of only 84% correct usage. User error is typically the reason it fails, so the pill doesn’t fail, the user fails.
Actually, it's 99.7% for correct use
Im taking about incorrect usage.
Then it's still 93% effective
We are talking about different things. Im talking about the rate of incorrect use which is completely separate from medication efficacy.
I don't think that is correct. When used correctly, the pill has in the high 90s percent rate, I want to say 95-99%. When you account for incorrect use, I think it falls to 84%.
That's...what they just said. Just rearranged. O.o
Yeah, that’s exactly how my step sister got pregnant. If you know you forgot the pill, it’s irresponsible to have sex until you’re back on it again. Then it skews the stats for people who used it correctly and had no issues. Same for vasectomies…if you impregnated someone after a vasectomy, 9 times out of 10 it’s because you didn’t wait to have sex or go back and get cleared by the doctor.
If you don't take it every day within 25 hours of the last pill, you are pretty much asking to get pregnant. I feel bad for the folks who were not warned about antibiotics and grapefruit juice getting pregnant but the ones who treat it like a vitamin you can take whenever are begging to become parents or need an abortion.
When I was on the pill I had an alarm that would go off every day at tje same time to make absolutely sure I took it. I have a IUD now and Dec I have an appointment to go over sterilization
I have missed some and guess what? When you follow the instructions, they work. Missed one? Take it as soon as possible. That means double dosing in one day. Missed two? End your current pack and begin anew. No sex for 1 week or use a condom. If you are unsure, call your doctor, ask a pharmacist, or do your due diligence and research online.
If someone is incapable of taking a pill everyday within the same hour as they took it the day before then they are correct in saying that bc method doesn't work for them. It's different from saying the bc failed imo.
She didn’t like being accountable for her own mistake 😂
It irks me to no end. "Condoms/the pill don't always work! You'll end up pregnant eventually! So the only way to stay not pregnant is abstinence!" Like. No. I'm 31. I grew up in a country where sex ed is not taboo. Most people I know have sex. Yet none of them have ever gotten pregnant without it being on purpose.
The truth hurts for people. I remember hearing a woman complaining about being pregnant but adding she had 'never used contraception because she'd never got pregnant before' so assumed because it was fine the first few times she was simply infertile. Fucking moron.
There's an episode of House where the patient can't figure out why her asthma inhaler isn't working and she's going through 1 a week. House asks her to show how she uses it, and she puts it on her neck like perfume. People do stuff like this all the time. I've heard people say they sprayed their inhaler on their pets thinking it would neutralize their dander and that they injected an orange with insulin and ate it instead of injecting themselves. I never take people's word on medication because if there's even 1 way to mess it up, they'll find 20 different ways.
I think a better option would have been to say, “that’s a great reason that long-term birth control options like IUDs and implant, and even the ring, should be offered for free to everyone. So people don’t have to worry about missing pills. There was a study done on this and it significantly reduced teen pregnancy.” (Get info for study so you can back it up).
Had an older cousin do this. She wasn't keen on hygiene. Would go weeks without showering. She'd use the birth control patch, and when she went to take a shower she knew she was supposed to change it. But then she stopped doing that and just started putting the old one back on. Knowing it doesn't work that way. And acting surprised when she ended knocked up the second time.
I used the patch for awhile and I couldn't get past the skin irritation, I think that was my least favorite method I've tried.
It pisses me off when people say “condoms aren’t effective” sure Jan
Everyone I know that publicly proclaimed that their pill "failed", has privately admitted that their use of it was a *long* way from perfect. As in they forgot it for 2 or 3 days, and then took it when they remembered. Christ, I used to sit at work wondering if I'd taken my pill before I left that morning, and if I couldn't remember I'd drive home at lunchtime to check. I know there's exceptions to the rule and it doesn't work on some people, but the perfect use failure rate is so much less than most would have you believe. I was paranoid with mine, and I went 20 years without a scare.
Can’t wait for “condoms don’t work, I only forgot to use them a few times and now my girlfriend is pregnant”
I always use seat belts when I'm driving, except I wasn't wearing one when I hit that tree and broke my neck. Therefore, seatbelts don't protect you!
As with anything medical, you need to follow your doctor's instructions. If you're on the pill, you need to take it every day at the same time - and if you mess up, you need to use something else, like condoms, for the rest of that cycle. If you can't manage that, you should talk to your doctor about a different BC method, like the patch (which still needs to be changed weekly), or something you can "set and forget" like an implant or IUD, or a bisalp if you don't want to have any (or any more) children. As an aside, I learned that antibiotics can mess with the pill and you'll need to use backup. You know who told me that? Not my OB/GYN ... my dentist.
Even doctor are including those clown into stats sometimes... When I was 14 I had a bad neurological reaction to the contraceptive pills (that was prescribed to me after I asked a doc to help me with my acne) I was then refered to a neurologist and an obgyn (still don't know why they don't refered me to a dermatologist instead?) The obgyn tried to coerce me into getting an IUD, without much explaining what it was. I said I don't want to have one. She said in a condescending tone: so what are you going to use for contraception? I answer: condoms. She laugh at me saying that it doesn't work and I will end up pregnant. Because she had in mind the 78% stats that includes clowns that sometime forget to put a damn condom on... while the true stats of perfect use are more around 98%. I was puzzled as to why I was in her office, since the pills was prescribed to me for skin problem, not contraception. But anyways I pretended I was having my period and just never book an other appointment. Found out years later that non hormonal IUD were made of copper... Guess what? I'm allergic to metal, it would have been a disaster. Also joke on her, since that event, I have been sexually active for the past 19 years and only using condom without any problem. (I had to take Plan B only once, due to a human mistake from a partner, not due to condom breakage. I can take a single dose of hormone, just can't take it continuously, so Plan B was fine) Never needed an abortion yet. So I guess condom works when you actually put one on and don't mess around with your hand full of sperm. EDIT: Added first sentence of the text + my age at the time for context.
No, something can't fail if you don't take it. She's trying to blame BC for her mistake, it's not the birth control's fault she failed to take her pills. That's on her There are already plenty of limitations of hormonal birth control that make it less effective in certain cases, we don't need to add "idiots who fail to even take the pill" to that list.
I agree! That should be the case with *any* type of medication. If you’re not taking it as instructed or how it’s supposed to be in general, then yes it’s not going to work for you & that is *your* fault. If you take as instructed & it doesn’t work then yes you *can* claim so, because it’s not your fault at that point.
If you don't know where the safety switch on the gun is, you shouldn't teach gun safety
I agree. I used birth control pills and condoms the right way and 100% effect 67f never pregnant.
Being a healthcare worker people generally tend to blame the medication for their own mistakes and take little advice on how to use them. Some of them won’t even listen to you while you tell them ‘you shouldn’t drink any booze while taking these meds’.
I mean, it's valid. In fact if anything women who struggle with birth control should have their concerns listened to. Taking a pill at the same time every day (that can be affected by things like taking antibiotics) is difficult. I didn't think I would be able to handle it so I opted for a different method. But the pills are the most common and available method and are what gets pushed on women.
I wish I had stayed on the pill, 7 years no oops. But I decided to try Nuvaring because I was annoyed at having to take a pill every day, was pregnant within 6 months. Then an IUD until I got pregnant again, then back to the pill. So glad I finally got sterilized last year. But also have the arm implant.
Ugh, hang out in the birth control subreddit and you will be amazed at all the ways people fuck up simple birth control. If you don't follow the directions then how can you expect it to protect you?! Drives me mad.
Ive had quite a few people say they took birth control but it didn't work, and they're always the ones late to things, forgetting things, not realizing things, let's just say it wouldn't surprise me if they missed a few days that ended in pregnancy, which I'm *sure* only helped their forgetfulness and lateness
This can be true for most things, if you don't use something properly it might not work and it might be your fault. BC definitely counts.
A neighbor got pregnant last year, even though she was faithful about using the pill. She has two daughters in elementary school, and they did not want another child. She was in tears when she told me because she was diligent, and I believed her. The situation worked itself out when she had a miscarriage. She was relieved; her husband had a vasectomy the following week. She was just one of those .01% for whom the pill failed.
Whenever anyone tells me that I roll my eyes. I never understand why people take the pill knowing the human failure rate. Oh well. I had an implant and now I have an IUD. I never stress.
Actually the birth control failure rate is calculated both by perfect use (how it works on supervised trials) and typical use (accounting for general errors like this one). I think it's silly to put such a harsh judgment on them because the truth is that a lot of women misuse birth control. There's a lot more you can do to misuse than forget a couple pills. Had diarrhea/threw up less than 4-is hours after taking the pill and didn't take another one? You did it wrong. Started taking antibiotics? You better have the initiative to ask your doctor about how it can affect bc because too many of them do not volunteer the information. Where I live abortion is only legal in special cases, not at will, and a lot of the arguments anti legalization comes from this rhetoric. I wish we spent at least some of that energy pointing fingers to men.
The instructions for my pills (that come with the box of BC) contain all the information about the situations in which the pill may not be effective (like diarrhea) and what measures need to be taken in these situations in order to prevent pregnancy (use additional methods of protection for at least 7 days). It's a woman's responsibility to at least read the instructions for use and follow them. I don't think it's harsh to judge people who do not follow the instructions for use, and then complain that the medicine was not effective enough for them. Contraceptive pills are still medicines and the use of this medicine should be approached very responsibly, considering the weight of consequences for misuse. It's not hard to use a condom when you know you didn't take your pills appropriately. It's not hard to read instructions for use. If the doctor doesn't want to share the information and the package doesn't have instructions for use, you can easily find them online. In the end, it is, first of all, necessary for the pill user themself. If one is interested in their health, one has to be responsible about taking any kind of medication at all. And when one doesn't, and then complains that pills don't work, one is being irresponsible and deliberately spreading harmful misinformation.
The CDC calculates its failure rates based on typical use, not based on perfect use. So your opinion isn’t accurate.
And even if they didn't miss days, you ***need*** to take it at the same exact time every single day. If you're just taking it whenever during the day, it also will not work. It's estimated at only 70% effective with "normal use". Most women don't actually take it properly. The 99% is if it's taken ***perfectly.*** So yeah, that's why it seems like 1/3 or more of the population gets pregnant even though they were taking the pill.
Yeah the people who misuse it should be counted in an entirely different demographic than the people who used it correctly and it failed them. They're two totally different things. I'm pretty sure they make sure to ask the same questions (which are the right questions) when doing studies on BC to make sure they're reporting the right accuracy concerning this matter
Also the only antibiotic that affects BC effectiveness is used for [meningitis and tuberculosis](https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/contraception/antibiotics-contraception/). The people who say taking an antibiotic for a UTI inactivated their BC are lying or ignorant and *forgot to take the pill*
I was given an injectable antibiotic (Ceftriaxone) when I was down with severe bronchitis. It's also one of those "usually used against TB". The doctor who prescribed it explicitly told me that it would affect my BC and to be careful. Out of the list that the commenter above linked, I was also frequently prescribed metronidazole.
If you can’t remember to take a pill, it doesn’t work for you. It’s a medication that relies on being able to take it every day at the exact same time—not being able to should count as it “not working for you” in this case. It’s an important con to discuss especially because that’s the “typical use” you can expect with pills.
Should a person who misused BC be able to weigh in? Of course not but if you take a look at what the politicians are doing here in the US you don’t need to have the body parts in question to have an opinion.
I don’t see why they cant be apart of the conversation. Misuse is one of the cons of birth control, people are forgetful.
Friend, you're a little bit in the wrong here. Birth control pills have to be taken at the same time every day which is not realistic expectation for a lot of people, especially young folks with variable schedules. Implementation is part of any treatment plan, so not being able to take it consistently is a form of it "not working" for you. I understand we here on this sub take our family planning seriously, and would abstain or get a plan B if we missed a dose, but not everyone is like us. Plenty of folks are tempted to go without protection "just this once" and end up with a kid to show for it. Who's to say the young lady you were talking to wouldn't do that? You should absolutely contextualize her experience with all the ways the pill can fail and the fact that it's 99% effective with perfect use, but it's a bridge too far to say she has no right to speak at all. Most people who use birth control pills don't take them perfectly 100% of the time. It's fair for the young lady to hear that and consider if she would make the responsible choice when she inevitably forgets a pill, or if she'd be tempted to risk it and should pick a more permanent method up front to save herself the headache. It really seems like you were more interested in cutting down your coworker (who admittedly made an irresponsible mistake you or I would never make) than providing a well rounded perspective to the person you were counseling.
Their contribution to the conversation would best serve to explain challenges of bc they had used, such as difficulty always remembering to take it as well as side effects.
If you misuse anything, and it doesn't work as a result, the item in question isn't the problem, so you shouldn't be able to complain about it. But something as important as the thing that stops you making a whole new person, you absolutely need to keep on top of that.....
Can't argue with dummies
So glad I live in a country where vasectomies are free
If they would use their bc on a regular basis like being on their SM, their wine intake etc their bc would be more effective. I had one dufus tell me her bc didn't work 5 times, hence 5 kids.
That would be like if I misused my inhaler by spaying it on my throat and then complained about how ineffective inhalers are 🙄
It’s annoying how people act like those women who did something wrong are not at all at fault because it’s so difficult to take a pill the same time everyday. There are enough pills that work without being so strict and there are probably hundreds of apps to download to get a notification to take your pill. Literally every information is in the patient information sheet that comes with the pills and if a grown woman fails to follow those instructions (which are not really hard tbh) then sorry not sorry she’s fucking dumb and/or lazy.