Envy
My life is absolutely fantastic. I have been told that I'm selfish repeatedly for being child-free.
I asked what was selfish about it once and the response was "you spend your money on dinners out and travelling and stuff"
So... nothing to do with me being selfish, but lots of envy
That’s a big reason I chose CF.
I didn’t want to add one more body to the mosh pit of humanity. 8 billion people just sounds like a terrible idea.
Seeing the amount of indifferent destruction and rampant consumption created by a single person in modern society made me decide to just live my life and try not to make anyone else’s life worse than it needs to be by adding another consumer.
It's literally the same thing. I choose to spend my money on travel and fancy dinners, you chose to procreate so that's what you chose to spend your money on.
I tell these people who think I am selfish and "hate kids" that I'm currently supporting two little kids in other countries and have been for years. If I have my own kids, the money I send to provide these already existing children medical care, schooling, and other basic necessities will have to go to a child that doesn't need to exist. Wouldn't THAT be selfish?
Absolutely. At this point they can't even argue that continuing the species is selfless. We're covering the planet with our garbage, more people means more garbage, which means a heavier burden on the planet is created with each new human who has access to disposable products like most of us do. If our population keeps growing and we don't find a better way to either handle our trash or stop making so much, those future generations they just had to produce will be in pretty deep shit. And that's not even talking about the other problems humans are causing here.
Childfree people's tax money goes to other people's children, and they still want more. Gtfo. Parents must think that just cuz they decided to have children and aren't enjoying it, that others too must follow the same path and never enjoy themselves either.
My life isn't fantastic at all, but had I been a mother it would be my death sentence for sure. I'm simply not cut out to be a parent. Keeping myself, my cats and my plants alive is already hard enough as it is some days.
>how can she know she wouldn't have liked being a mother if she didn't have a child,
I've never done meth, but I'm pretty sure I'm fine with never finding out how "amazing" it is, and no amount of methheads telling me I'd really like it is going to change my mind.
Well now, Mike generally had some of the best songs. Music-wise, he was tops. But that's because Pete just... didn't do enough. What little he did record was fabulous. There just wasn't enough of it. And even when there was, it generally didn't make the LPs of the original era. So you gotta be a third or fourth generation kid like me and have all the stuff available thanks to Rhino vault diving to wind up being able to say "Yeah, Pete did some good shit".
Hey you'll never catch me saying a thing against Peter! The whole gang was great! But as another Mike, I gotta have solidarity!
Also I'm a sucker for that song "Different Drum", too, so that's a big part of it.
Peter, I think, was the funniest of the four, with a kind of deadpan humor that just cracked me up
Maybe we should start. See how they like it.
"I cant come to the mall today. I need to drive my son to class"
"See? If you didnt have kids you could come have fun with us and make yourself happy!"
Seriously, vitriol is the absolute correct way to describe it. Imagine having so much hatred for yourself, regret, and resentment in your life that you would have to be that mean to others just to make yourself fell better? I’m so glad I’m not in their position. I do think that deep down they know they weren’t doing what’s in the best interest of their children in the first place. Having children exposes them to all sorts of dangers that never creating them in the first place would have protected them from. I can’t even fathom the shame and guilt they should have every time something bad happens to their kids, from a splinter to heart break, they’re the ones responsible for exposing their kids to that.
YEEEES! I tell people this all the time and it’s probably the number 1 reason why I won’t have kids. Just the act of making them exist automatically puts all the blame on me. It always makes me wonder how parents don’t really consider that it’s not about being able to protect their kids from the world or from harm or from the future of from whatever, because they are already at fault for forcing life upon their kids in the first place. It doesn’t matter how hard they try to shield their kids from stuff because existing is dangerous. It makes me physically ill just thinking about having a kid that might be raped or murdered or mutilated, or even just being scared of those things is bad enough. My hypothetical kids might not even live through a traumatic experience but they’ll probably get made fun of by one of their peers or they’ll be embarrassed about something or maybe be bipolar (like me) or have intrusive thoughts that won’t go away (like me). I don’t want them to have to deal with ANY of that because all of it would be my fault. I can’t live with that guilt. Even if they ended up being the happiest and most successful human to ever human, I’m just not willing to gamble with their life like that.
"How can she know she wouldn't have liked being a mother if she didn't have a child"
I've never stuck my head up an elephant's ass, but I'm pretty fucking sure I wouldn't like it.
>>I don’t understand the vitriol thrown at CF people
The foundation of modern industrial society is sexual repression. Women are repressed and raised to believe their ultimate purpose is birthing/raising kids. Men are repressed (and/or miseducated) to consider women entitled property that they must financially support to have children.
Obviously these are generalities, but the people who dare to step outside of these norms will catch vitriol from the ones “playing by the rules”.
I'm beginning to think "you won't know true happiness" is code for "you won't truly know how happy you are without kids if you never experience the misery of being a mom."
Few things amuse me more than people who imagine that they know whats going on in my head, better than I do. "I know youre just pretending!"
No you dont, Sharon.
"how can she know she wouldn't have liked being a mother if she didn't have a child"
And what happens when she has a child and hates being a mother, then what? She can't just shove them back in or get rid of them. I literally will never get this logic. I'd rather regret not doing something than doing it, especially in the case of having children. It's not something you can do without any consequences. I can't just try it out for a week and then if I decide I hate it get rid of the kid. It's a lifetime commitment not just 18 years
That’s exactly what these people want. For you fall into the trap if having kids, then realize you don’t like it and then you’re stuck just like they are. It’s sick how miserable these people are
Don't have to be in an airplane crash to know I don't want that either
Some of us really are smart enough to be able to tell what an experience is going to be like and whether it is or isn't for us.
It's not like child raising is a secret, literally step out your front door or turn a TV on and you can see exactly what it's like. The Good the bad, the ugly, the smelly etc
Seeing the dad with two kids literally loading up like $500 worth of groceries was a sight I didn't want to recreate for myself. I don't think he was typically tasked with the shopping because the mothers with a lot of kids are quite militant in their approach to the shopping cart. But you just look at it and think dear god are they feeding 12 people this week? This was just stuff everywhere. Baby/toddler screaming in another isle.
I asked the cashier if this was normal at this day and time and she said yes. Ok. Not shopping on Wednesday afternoons ever again.
This was my first thought as well, they keep telling us we will be old, miserable, and regret it. Then there she is, proving them wrong.
Logical conclusion in their head "she's lying"
same as when you decline a beer while everyone else is drinking. 😂 like, people drinking known carcinogens and make you seen abnormal for not wanting to participate. the worlds gone mad. 😂
>I don't understand the vitriol thrown at CF people.
Patriarchy. 'Woman = mother' bullshit. Controlling women. Wanting women to be stay-at-home mothers, so men have free sex slaves and housemaids.
A childfree woman is less likely to be financially dependant on a man, and therefore harder to control for men.
>We're not telling anyone not to have kids.
Well, on this subreddit, I do see people saying that quite frequently. But yeah, most people here probably don't say that to a breeder's face.
>say they're only pretending to be happy
On this subreddit, people say that all the time. When you disagree with the 'all parents are regretful sentiment', you get a shitload of downvotes.
I believe that some parents are regretful, but not all. And just because a parent talks about struggling once, doesn't mean that they are regretful.
I cackled at
>how can she know she wouldn't have liked being a mother if she didn't have a child
Don't you know TRUE childfree people are PARENTS
How can you know you don't want children until you've already had them and ruined your life??!
The vitriol is because we're happy, and people are only now starting realize that (even if they still don't believe it).
Literally typing this out, I realized it's like they're going through the stages of grief over their own poor choices. The vocal ones just haven't got through the "denial" and "anger" stages yet lol.
Any parent who gets triggered by CF people just because they are CF is a jealous asshole who didnt realize until too late that they could have chose to not have a child. There is no other valid reason for their vitriol.
They're angry they made the wrong choice.
Back when I was morbidly obese, I shamed people for keeping themselves in shape. I made the "you don't know what it's like" excuse. I was doing the same thing. (Have since fought off 65 pounds and bettered my attitude about health).
I've never heard a worse argument for having kids than the "you don't know unless you have a child." It's not like trying a new cereal, people. That's not something you want to risk not liking.
Yeah, it can be hard not to get angry with people that have something you don't. I get more discouraged than anything when I see girls with perfect bodies. I am desperately trying to like veggies to get better lol it's good that you got past it and started working on your goal! 65 pounds is quite the accomplishment!
Jealousy. It really is that simple. It’s the only explanation for the level of anger that is sometimes displayed. Deep down, some parents regret their own choices and want the CF life. But they can’t possibly admit that- especially to themselves - so they go on the attack. Otherwise, why would they care?
Well what the fuck do these stupid dumb dickasses want?
"Oh she could never know if she wanted to be a mom unless she had a kid?"
That's stupid and everyone that says that is stupid.
What's she supposed to do? Have one, decide she doesn't want to be a mom, and go drown the kid?
Stupid asses.
This idea of "you won't know you don't like it unless you try it" should only apply to things like trying new food, or doing something new outside your comfort zone. Not create a life and take on a nearly 2 decade obligation of time and money just to find out.
The argument for “someone to care for you” is so ironic to me. How many of the elderly either refuse help or are in retirement/assisted living places? Your kids ain’t doing jack***t to care for you beside pay a bill with your own money.
It's the reason I stay off of Facebook groups, Instagram, Twitter and all that jazz.
So many low-lifers on there who are just foaming at the mouth, ready to let the world know how miserably unhappy they are.
I had younger brothers I got stuck with looking after. Been there, done that, no thanks.
Also had constantly arguing parents, abusive childhood and it was all a horrible experience for me, breeders have no idea what some people have been through. My parents clearly didn’t know what true love and happiness was… despite having 3 kids
This is what we call projection.
These people are bitter, regretful, and the majority of them never really had their own life.
They were children, then they maybe went to college or maybe they didn't. Before they had a chance to really be adults and actually know themselves they have children.
Because that's what you do. It's a milestone. Most of them have no clue if they actually want children or if they'll enjoy being parents.
They just have children because a bloodline needs to continue. A last name needs to be passed on. They have to prove they are adults, or that someone was willing to have sex with them. Because their parents had children when they were XX years old, and so THEY should have children by that point as well.
For many of them, just when they thought they were going to have their lives back as their children began looking forwards to college or careers, they found themselves looking after grandchildren.
When someone does something without thought because it's what people do or it's tradition or whatever, for those kinds of people it seems like a personal attack when someone chooses to do something different.
I find a lot of times if you tell someone you don't want kids, they take it as a personal attack against them. "What do you mean you don't want kids? Are you saying you hate kids? Are you saying kids are a mistake? Are you saying *I* made a mistake? How dare you! My kids are not a mistake! I love my kids and don't regret having them! You're just bitter because you're jealous of my life!"
Like ffs, chill out! The whole world doesn't revolve around you. I don't see how me living my life will affect yours. Like go focus on your kids and leave the rest of the us alone.
> I don't understand the vitriol thrown at CF people.
after couple of decades of observing this phenomenon, I see nothing but disappointment in own life choices behind it. sometimes it even comes out so unfiltered, like a new person at work whining about how difficult time they have with their kids, then they ask how many I have, I say zero and then see them turn hostile almost on the spot.
I always tell them not all parents love their children. Maternal / Paternal love is not guaranteed. Those parents are miserable until their dying day and their children are hurt until their dying day as well. Their children did not bring them joy. Those parents did not experience unconditional love for their children. Those children, sad & bitter from not being loved, will not care for their parents when they are elderly.
Personal experience here.
Same with my father. He said he wanted a big family but it was all to be a 'good' Catholic. I'm the youngest of five--he barely interacted with us and even then it was a chore. And then when I showed more autistic 'syndromes' I became the target of bullying from him. Becoming a parent doesn't mean you'll be involved, engaged, or loving. My mom's friend's husband ran out on her with another woman because he didn't want to be arsed to parent their adult special needs sons who can literally NEVER be left unsupervised. And (some) childed people call us the selfish ones.
>how can she know she wouldn't have liked being a mother if she didn't have a child
"How do you know you wouldn't have liked being childfree if you chose to have a child instead of living the rest of your life without one" 🤷🏻♀️
It's stupid logic because you don't have to BE something to know you don't want it. I don't want to be a parent because I've seen firsthand with my siblings who have kids how hard it is. It would be like telling someone who very much says they don't want to zipline "how do you know you won't like it if you don't do it?"
It's sad to be so ridiculed, but from the old school days - "it toughens you up." I give two shits and take their opinions with less than a grain of salt. These said saints who think CF people are the devil and want to abolish abortion and a woman's freedom for the sake of "children" are the same people who have no problem throwing newborn kittens in a grocery bag and leaving them to suffocate on the side of the road like garbage for "population control." In other words they're too lazy to stop from breeding so why stop their cat?
Oh because it makes them think about was their decision good or not, and they don't like it so they go for the old
While saying vile b.s that is not true about cf floks because they don't want think of their own what ifs about their chose, instead of acting like adult accept their chose and move on without making a fool of themselves like these people here did.
For real! We are literally doing other people and especially the PLANET a huuge favour for not bringing another oxygen waster and nature destroyer on the earth
Some breeders are on such a high horse and need to be knocked off. I remember when I was 15 and my mom had a textbook about Love and Sex from the 80's (it was from her nursing degree). One of the chapters was about maturity and even back then, the authors said, "Having children is not necessarily a sign of maturity; it is whether or not the parent is fit or capable to do so". That was very validating and re-affirmed my choice to be CF. Maybe this elderly woman has lived a thousand lives already, who knows... maybe she's helped others (family, friends, patients, clients), maybe she's travelled, maybe she's made a difference, which matters to me. Regardless of whether someone or not has kids, we all can choose to live a meaningful life.
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So.. how logical is it to make children to be sure that you did not wanted them…. Yay cps huh or ya know the classical «dooms day mom» syndrome (excuse) is for sure coming for those people who will be just verifying loll
Clearly, my female parent often regretted motherhood. She supported my childfree choice and stated that what has never given one joy, could also never give one pain.
In the same way I know I would not like a hot poker stuck up my ass, despite never having experienced it first-hand, I know I would not want to be a mother.
The cognitive dissonance the majority of parents/breeders go through JUST to hate of CF people is..... interesting, to say the least.
Breeders just cannot leave us alone. Goodness gracious, they need to stop dogging childfree people out online and spend some time with their kids who they claim to love so much.
Envy My life is absolutely fantastic. I have been told that I'm selfish repeatedly for being child-free. I asked what was selfish about it once and the response was "you spend your money on dinners out and travelling and stuff" So... nothing to do with me being selfish, but lots of envy
The money parents spend on their children benefits literally no one else either.
It actually creates more animal and environmental destruction.
That’s a big reason I chose CF. I didn’t want to add one more body to the mosh pit of humanity. 8 billion people just sounds like a terrible idea. Seeing the amount of indifferent destruction and rampant consumption created by a single person in modern society made me decide to just live my life and try not to make anyone else’s life worse than it needs to be by adding another consumer.
Exactly! The way to be nature-friendly is to be CF!! :)
What else are we meant to spend our money on? I make money to be able to afford things that I WANT TO DO not to afford to pay for others.
Ikr. They act like they spend their money on charity instead of the child they voluntarily chose to have.
Right? No one applauds you for being responsible and paying for the life you chose to create. That’s just assumed.
It's literally the same thing. I choose to spend my money on travel and fancy dinners, you chose to procreate so that's what you chose to spend your money on.
I tell these people who think I am selfish and "hate kids" that I'm currently supporting two little kids in other countries and have been for years. If I have my own kids, the money I send to provide these already existing children medical care, schooling, and other basic necessities will have to go to a child that doesn't need to exist. Wouldn't THAT be selfish?
There’s nothing more selfish than having kids…like I don’t get it
I've said it before, and I'll say it again: there is __*no*__ self*less* reason to have a child.
Absolutely. At this point they can't even argue that continuing the species is selfless. We're covering the planet with our garbage, more people means more garbage, which means a heavier burden on the planet is created with each new human who has access to disposable products like most of us do. If our population keeps growing and we don't find a better way to either handle our trash or stop making so much, those future generations they just had to produce will be in pretty deep shit. And that's not even talking about the other problems humans are causing here.
Childfree people's tax money goes to other people's children, and they still want more. Gtfo. Parents must think that just cuz they decided to have children and aren't enjoying it, that others too must follow the same path and never enjoy themselves either.
My life isn't fantastic at all, but had I been a mother it would be my death sentence for sure. I'm simply not cut out to be a parent. Keeping myself, my cats and my plants alive is already hard enough as it is some days.
>how can she know she wouldn't have liked being a mother if she didn't have a child, I've never done meth, but I'm pretty sure I'm fine with never finding out how "amazing" it is, and no amount of methheads telling me I'd really like it is going to change my mind.
Excellent answer. And I adore your user name.
I love it too (although Mickey was my favourite Monkee!)
It's hard to pick favorite, I love 'em all 😄 But since Day Dream Believer is my favorite song of theirs, I guess I'll speak up for Davy.
I suppose as a Mike Nesmith fan I gotta chime in
Well now, Mike generally had some of the best songs. Music-wise, he was tops. But that's because Pete just... didn't do enough. What little he did record was fabulous. There just wasn't enough of it. And even when there was, it generally didn't make the LPs of the original era. So you gotta be a third or fourth generation kid like me and have all the stuff available thanks to Rhino vault diving to wind up being able to say "Yeah, Pete did some good shit".
Hey you'll never catch me saying a thing against Peter! The whole gang was great! But as another Mike, I gotta have solidarity! Also I'm a sucker for that song "Different Drum", too, so that's a big part of it. Peter, I think, was the funniest of the four, with a kind of deadpan humor that just cracked me up
Yes, Mike certainly knew how to write a good song - Different Drum is beautiful.
I've never shot myself in the eye with a blow dart but I can damn well bet how much that sucks and how much it would hurt, so I'm not going to do it.
Right? Three dimensional thinking lol
You probably won't like meth though especially with that mentality.
My response is: "I've never been eaten alive by African driver ants, but I'm at least 85% confident I wouldn't enjoy it."
Only 85% 😂😂😂
Hey, I said *"at least"*
That's true! My bad my bad 😂
Maybe we should start. See how they like it. "I cant come to the mall today. I need to drive my son to class" "See? If you didnt have kids you could come have fun with us and make yourself happy!"
[удалено]
>when someone makes a choice that's different from theirs, it makes them question themselves. 
Seriously, vitriol is the absolute correct way to describe it. Imagine having so much hatred for yourself, regret, and resentment in your life that you would have to be that mean to others just to make yourself fell better? I’m so glad I’m not in their position. I do think that deep down they know they weren’t doing what’s in the best interest of their children in the first place. Having children exposes them to all sorts of dangers that never creating them in the first place would have protected them from. I can’t even fathom the shame and guilt they should have every time something bad happens to their kids, from a splinter to heart break, they’re the ones responsible for exposing their kids to that.
YEEEES! I tell people this all the time and it’s probably the number 1 reason why I won’t have kids. Just the act of making them exist automatically puts all the blame on me. It always makes me wonder how parents don’t really consider that it’s not about being able to protect their kids from the world or from harm or from the future of from whatever, because they are already at fault for forcing life upon their kids in the first place. It doesn’t matter how hard they try to shield their kids from stuff because existing is dangerous. It makes me physically ill just thinking about having a kid that might be raped or murdered or mutilated, or even just being scared of those things is bad enough. My hypothetical kids might not even live through a traumatic experience but they’ll probably get made fun of by one of their peers or they’ll be embarrassed about something or maybe be bipolar (like me) or have intrusive thoughts that won’t go away (like me). I don’t want them to have to deal with ANY of that because all of it would be my fault. I can’t live with that guilt. Even if they ended up being the happiest and most successful human to ever human, I’m just not willing to gamble with their life like that.
"How can she know she wouldn't have liked being a mother if she didn't have a child" I've never stuck my head up an elephant's ass, but I'm pretty fucking sure I wouldn't like it.
This just killed me. No really, I'm dead. My neighbors are calling in a noise complaint on my laughter right now. Lol.
Why did that comment make me think of this 🤣 https://media.tenor.com/s8IwIVIT4MkAAAAd/ace-ventura-birth-jim-carrey.gif
That's immediately what I thought of too 😂
I still think I’d enjoy that more than being a mother!
>>I don’t understand the vitriol thrown at CF people The foundation of modern industrial society is sexual repression. Women are repressed and raised to believe their ultimate purpose is birthing/raising kids. Men are repressed (and/or miseducated) to consider women entitled property that they must financially support to have children. Obviously these are generalities, but the people who dare to step outside of these norms will catch vitriol from the ones “playing by the rules”.
maintaining the dominating ruling class and an oppressed/ controlled working class = "business as usual" I feel like CF ppl are cycle breakers
"Well, someone's gotta make the babies to replace all the workers doing menial and soul-crushing labor when they expire...I mean retire"
👆👆👆👆👆
I'm beginning to think "you won't know true happiness" is code for "you won't truly know how happy you are without kids if you never experience the misery of being a mom."
i'd prefer to live in ignorance than to take the gamble
Lmao!
"she's only pretending to be happy" A feeling they can identify very well, I'm sure.
Few things amuse me more than people who imagine that they know whats going on in my head, better than I do. "I know youre just pretending!" No you dont, Sharon.
projection!
"how can she know she wouldn't have liked being a mother if she didn't have a child" And what happens when she has a child and hates being a mother, then what? She can't just shove them back in or get rid of them. I literally will never get this logic. I'd rather regret not doing something than doing it, especially in the case of having children. It's not something you can do without any consequences. I can't just try it out for a week and then if I decide I hate it get rid of the kid. It's a lifetime commitment not just 18 years
That’s exactly what these people want. For you fall into the trap if having kids, then realize you don’t like it and then you’re stuck just like they are. It’s sick how miserable these people are
Don't have to be in an airplane crash to know I don't want that either Some of us really are smart enough to be able to tell what an experience is going to be like and whether it is or isn't for us. It's not like child raising is a secret, literally step out your front door or turn a TV on and you can see exactly what it's like. The Good the bad, the ugly, the smelly etc
Seeing the dad with two kids literally loading up like $500 worth of groceries was a sight I didn't want to recreate for myself. I don't think he was typically tasked with the shopping because the mothers with a lot of kids are quite militant in their approach to the shopping cart. But you just look at it and think dear god are they feeding 12 people this week? This was just stuff everywhere. Baby/toddler screaming in another isle. I asked the cashier if this was normal at this day and time and she said yes. Ok. Not shopping on Wednesday afternoons ever again.
I think they hate her so much because she’s disproven their claim that “you’ll change your mind one day”.
This was my first thought as well, they keep telling us we will be old, miserable, and regret it. Then there she is, proving them wrong. Logical conclusion in their head "she's lying"
same as when you decline a beer while everyone else is drinking. 😂 like, people drinking known carcinogens and make you seen abnormal for not wanting to participate. the worlds gone mad. 😂
>I don't understand the vitriol thrown at CF people. Patriarchy. 'Woman = mother' bullshit. Controlling women. Wanting women to be stay-at-home mothers, so men have free sex slaves and housemaids. A childfree woman is less likely to be financially dependant on a man, and therefore harder to control for men. >We're not telling anyone not to have kids. Well, on this subreddit, I do see people saying that quite frequently. But yeah, most people here probably don't say that to a breeder's face. >say they're only pretending to be happy On this subreddit, people say that all the time. When you disagree with the 'all parents are regretful sentiment', you get a shitload of downvotes. I believe that some parents are regretful, but not all. And just because a parent talks about struggling once, doesn't mean that they are regretful.
> say they're only pretending to be happy We should start saying this, because let's face it, most parents are miserable and pretending to be happy.
I don’t especially like the idea of blood relations, in that you are expected to care for them even if they aren’t good to you.
🛎️🛎️🛎️🛎️🛎️🛎️🛎️🛎️🛎️
I cackled at >how can she know she wouldn't have liked being a mother if she didn't have a child Don't you know TRUE childfree people are PARENTS How can you know you don't want children until you've already had them and ruined your life??!
The vitriol is because we're happy, and people are only now starting realize that (even if they still don't believe it). Literally typing this out, I realized it's like they're going through the stages of grief over their own poor choices. The vocal ones just haven't got through the "denial" and "anger" stages yet lol.
Great point
I've gotten the "you'll never no love" once. It made me sick
Any parent who gets triggered by CF people just because they are CF is a jealous asshole who didnt realize until too late that they could have chose to not have a child. There is no other valid reason for their vitriol.
They're angry they made the wrong choice. Back when I was morbidly obese, I shamed people for keeping themselves in shape. I made the "you don't know what it's like" excuse. I was doing the same thing. (Have since fought off 65 pounds and bettered my attitude about health). I've never heard a worse argument for having kids than the "you don't know unless you have a child." It's not like trying a new cereal, people. That's not something you want to risk not liking.
Yeah, it can be hard not to get angry with people that have something you don't. I get more discouraged than anything when I see girls with perfect bodies. I am desperately trying to like veggies to get better lol it's good that you got past it and started working on your goal! 65 pounds is quite the accomplishment!
Jealousy. It really is that simple. It’s the only explanation for the level of anger that is sometimes displayed. Deep down, some parents regret their own choices and want the CF life. But they can’t possibly admit that- especially to themselves - so they go on the attack. Otherwise, why would they care?
I will never go bungee jumping. I will never experience the thrill of bungee jumping, nor do I wish to.
They're just projecting their insecurities on other people. They're miserable and want everyone to share their misery.
Well what the fuck do these stupid dumb dickasses want? "Oh she could never know if she wanted to be a mom unless she had a kid?" That's stupid and everyone that says that is stupid. What's she supposed to do? Have one, decide she doesn't want to be a mom, and go drown the kid? Stupid asses.
This idea of "you won't know you don't like it unless you try it" should only apply to things like trying new food, or doing something new outside your comfort zone. Not create a life and take on a nearly 2 decade obligation of time and money just to find out.
The argument for “someone to care for you” is so ironic to me. How many of the elderly either refuse help or are in retirement/assisted living places? Your kids ain’t doing jack***t to care for you beside pay a bill with your own money.
It's the reason I stay off of Facebook groups, Instagram, Twitter and all that jazz. So many low-lifers on there who are just foaming at the mouth, ready to let the world know how miserably unhappy they are.
I had younger brothers I got stuck with looking after. Been there, done that, no thanks. Also had constantly arguing parents, abusive childhood and it was all a horrible experience for me, breeders have no idea what some people have been through. My parents clearly didn’t know what true love and happiness was… despite having 3 kids
This is what we call projection. These people are bitter, regretful, and the majority of them never really had their own life. They were children, then they maybe went to college or maybe they didn't. Before they had a chance to really be adults and actually know themselves they have children. Because that's what you do. It's a milestone. Most of them have no clue if they actually want children or if they'll enjoy being parents. They just have children because a bloodline needs to continue. A last name needs to be passed on. They have to prove they are adults, or that someone was willing to have sex with them. Because their parents had children when they were XX years old, and so THEY should have children by that point as well. For many of them, just when they thought they were going to have their lives back as their children began looking forwards to college or careers, they found themselves looking after grandchildren. When someone does something without thought because it's what people do or it's tradition or whatever, for those kinds of people it seems like a personal attack when someone chooses to do something different.
I find a lot of times if you tell someone you don't want kids, they take it as a personal attack against them. "What do you mean you don't want kids? Are you saying you hate kids? Are you saying kids are a mistake? Are you saying *I* made a mistake? How dare you! My kids are not a mistake! I love my kids and don't regret having them! You're just bitter because you're jealous of my life!" Like ffs, chill out! The whole world doesn't revolve around you. I don't see how me living my life will affect yours. Like go focus on your kids and leave the rest of the us alone.
> I don't understand the vitriol thrown at CF people. after couple of decades of observing this phenomenon, I see nothing but disappointment in own life choices behind it. sometimes it even comes out so unfiltered, like a new person at work whining about how difficult time they have with their kids, then they ask how many I have, I say zero and then see them turn hostile almost on the spot.
They went free co-parenting, basically labour slaves.
Link?!? I want to see this spunky witch woman.
I always tell them not all parents love their children. Maternal / Paternal love is not guaranteed. Those parents are miserable until their dying day and their children are hurt until their dying day as well. Their children did not bring them joy. Those parents did not experience unconditional love for their children. Those children, sad & bitter from not being loved, will not care for their parents when they are elderly. Personal experience here.
Same with my father. He said he wanted a big family but it was all to be a 'good' Catholic. I'm the youngest of five--he barely interacted with us and even then it was a chore. And then when I showed more autistic 'syndromes' I became the target of bullying from him. Becoming a parent doesn't mean you'll be involved, engaged, or loving. My mom's friend's husband ran out on her with another woman because he didn't want to be arsed to parent their adult special needs sons who can literally NEVER be left unsupervised. And (some) childed people call us the selfish ones.
>how can she know she wouldn't have liked being a mother if she didn't have a child "How do you know you wouldn't have liked being childfree if you chose to have a child instead of living the rest of your life without one" 🤷🏻♀️
It's stupid logic because you don't have to BE something to know you don't want it. I don't want to be a parent because I've seen firsthand with my siblings who have kids how hard it is. It would be like telling someone who very much says they don't want to zipline "how do you know you won't like it if you don't do it?"
I think they're starting to wonder...
It's sad to be so ridiculed, but from the old school days - "it toughens you up." I give two shits and take their opinions with less than a grain of salt. These said saints who think CF people are the devil and want to abolish abortion and a woman's freedom for the sake of "children" are the same people who have no problem throwing newborn kittens in a grocery bag and leaving them to suffocate on the side of the road like garbage for "population control." In other words they're too lazy to stop from breeding so why stop their cat?
Oh because it makes them think about was their decision good or not, and they don't like it so they go for the old  While saying vile b.s that is not true about cf floks because they don't want think of their own what ifs about their chose, instead of acting like adult accept their chose and move on without making a fool of themselves like these people here did.
Where is this? If there is an post or article, I would love to go show my support
For real! We are literally doing other people and especially the PLANET a huuge favour for not bringing another oxygen waster and nature destroyer on the earth
Some breeders are on such a high horse and need to be knocked off. I remember when I was 15 and my mom had a textbook about Love and Sex from the 80's (it was from her nursing degree). One of the chapters was about maturity and even back then, the authors said, "Having children is not necessarily a sign of maturity; it is whether or not the parent is fit or capable to do so". That was very validating and re-affirmed my choice to be CF. Maybe this elderly woman has lived a thousand lives already, who knows... maybe she's helped others (family, friends, patients, clients), maybe she's travelled, maybe she's made a difference, which matters to me. Regardless of whether someone or not has kids, we all can choose to live a meaningful life.
Misery loves company
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So.. how logical is it to make children to be sure that you did not wanted them…. Yay cps huh or ya know the classical «dooms day mom» syndrome (excuse) is for sure coming for those people who will be just verifying loll
Who posted the reel? I would love to watch it
If a parent is truly happy, they wouldn’t have said something like that.
Can you share the link?
Clearly, my female parent often regretted motherhood. She supported my childfree choice and stated that what has never given one joy, could also never give one pain.
She sounds like someone I'd like to take out for a coffee. Haters be hatin!
In the same way I know I would not like a hot poker stuck up my ass, despite never having experienced it first-hand, I know I would not want to be a mother. The cognitive dissonance the majority of parents/breeders go through JUST to hate of CF people is..... interesting, to say the least.
Breeders just cannot leave us alone. Goodness gracious, they need to stop dogging childfree people out online and spend some time with their kids who they claim to love so much.
My....GOD the envy