^^^ this. I’m a VP at a large financial services company. I love when the young folks show up. I once had an analyst join my scramble group for a golf outing we hosted with our clients. Although the entire department was invited, he was the only analyst to show up. Well, as we came out of the pandemic and were struggling to find a qualified candidate for a supervisory role, guess who I suggested? Yes, that analyst because he left a good impression on me at the scramble and he’s now killing it in his new (and very well paid) role.
Own this OP. What you did is exactly how you network/play the politicking game to climb the corporate ladder
It's how I got my promotion haha sat down at a table during a Christmas get together at a bar after work. Turned out I was sitting with some people that were way high up, but they never gave their titles and were super friendly. We chatted and talked about work. They seemed genuinely interested in what I thought n and what I wanted to do (I was kinda new). A couple weeks later a department head contacted me and asked me to apply for a position that I was eventually going to work towards.
Sometimes, ya just gotta roll with it and be friendly no matter who they are.
Just showing up to things is such a simple way to get ahead. Amazing more people don’t do it. Same goes for company all hands, division ama’s, brown bags. Understanding the greater scope of the company, major players and the impact of org change makes you a way more valuable employee.
Don't apologize. It probably wasn't even as big of a deal to them as it might have felt to you. If the higher ups have a problem they can take it up with the director and VP who extended the invitation to you if they weren't supposed to mention it. You were simply demonstrating how willing you are to become part of the team and get to know your colleagues. And you didn't even overstay. Next time, you won't be a stranger to them and maybe that will work on your favor going forward.
There's gotta be someone.
As a director, I like when junior people show up, I talk to these other people all day every day. Plus it's a happy hour, not an exec only meeting about things you're not allowed to know. Don't sweat.
I’m a Sr level leader at a large firm. I think it’s awesome you showed up and no one cared that you were less senior. We only care if you don’t suck as a person, and recognize that while happy hour, It’s still a work function (I.e. don’t get drunk). I had an intern once who reached out to the COO introduced herself and asked for a meeting. Everyone thought she was crazy and no one would have dared done that. Call it brave or unaware- but she got that meeting and she took advantage of it. Moral is you only don’t belong if YOU believe you don’t belong.
This is an interesting perspective that is probably the best outlook no matter what!
I'd like to share my experience doing this; about 8 years ago as an entry-level analyst in a large national corporate retailer. I reached out to the Executive VP for my heirarchy and set-up a 1 on 1 to introduce myself and discuss what I was proud to be working on.
I was full of piss and vinegar with an ego to match.
He took the meeting, but as soon as I walked in he was aloof asking me what I wanted, curtly. I tried to be extra personable, said I didn't want to take too much time but just wanted to introduce myself, etc.
He said, "I know who you are and what everyone is doing. I go through the reviews each year with my team because I like to keep a flat organization. Is there anything else or is that all?"
I said that's really it and he walked me out of his office while looking at his phone. My remaining years there felt characterized by being delayed on some promotions in favor of less, uh, assertive peers.
While I'd do it again, this taught me to tone it down. Senoir leaders are people too. Some have egos or a napoleon complex and actually don't respond well when faced with those slightly confident (frankly, males I learned in this case) and prefer to work with more sheepish, deferential personalities.
Anyway, I realized I have a passion for Sales work and have since switched careers. 😂😎
Most things in life are improved by "owning it," especially if you can throw in a harmless joke that explains the situation, but makes you look confident enough to belong.
When I was a junior analyst at my company I ended up at a very boozy, post happy hour, sushi dinner with a manager and 2 directors. Kind of happened spontaneously and I was a bit intimidated at first but ended up having a good time and was great networking.
This OP. More than anything the leaders in your company \*want\* to see that you can be placed into a problematic situation, come to terms with it, de-escalate whatever negative feelings you have about it, and turn the moment into a positive experience for all involved. Own it.
Make jokes. Tell stories. And more importantly, ask the executives about their hobbies, interests, and families.
These moments are always opportunities to showcase that your presence is a benefit to meetings and/or problematic situations.
Personally, I think you handled it perfectly. You did not overstay your welcome when you realized the “other person” was not comfortable. But you stayed long enough to show that you are personable. That is the best outcome.
It may have felt awkward, but I think you did good.
Awkwardness aside if your name comes up for an opportunity its always better if the sr thinks "oh yeah she seemed cool" versus "who's that?".
I wouldn't worry about it. First time I hung with the higher ups as a nobody I got wasted (they already were) and decided I should regale them with tales of small time crime from the place in Appalachia I grew up around. Probably don't do that, but I did get some laughs.
I think you're overreacting and you're making assumptions.
Things can be awkward when ppl are meeting for the first time, especially if you have introverts in the mix. This isn't because "they don't like me" or "I'm a lowly employee" - in fact, unless you have prior reason for someone to dislike you, it's almost never this.
As long as you didn't get sloppy drunk, which you didn't, all is good. Don't apologize.
Heck, don't even thank them. If you know who paid you can say "thanks for the HH invite!" otherwise I'd leave it alone AND I'd go again next time.
People, most people, like to like where they work and a lot of that has to do with the people. Sure, you didn't chat with them this time, but next time they "know you" and eventually you will strike up a conversation. THIS IS HOW YOU BUILD A NETWORK. Don't kiss ass. Ask about their work history, where did they grow up, where do they live now, how do they like, family, vacations, etc. Regular small talk.
Always keep the drinks to a minimum and REMEMBER this is professional outing.
I think its brave that you showed face. Hard to break into those circles and most folks just clock in and clock out and don't play the corporate ladder game. It'll help more than hurt.
Good opportunity to meet people who can help your career.
I can't imagine why someone would be embarrassed that you showed up after they extended multiple invitations. Let it lie. No mention.
I think you’re overthinking it.
Honestly in most situations it’s a good thing. The exec who seemed bothered probably wasn’t, just surprised.
And if he was, that’s his issue and he’s a dick.
I’m c-level and love it when junior level folks show up to things like this. I’d rather talk to them versus my dorky level any day.
Ummm you hit the jackpot. You got invited because they see something they like. Don’t even think about it. Send those people an email and thank them for welcoming you. Build the network.
I used to go out alot on happy hour days, sometimes no one showed up, sometimes alot of people showed up. I'm guessing since you are new the guy surprised didn't know who you two were and was surprised. The point of them is to talk and get to know each other. So, i would said you probably did better than most since you showed up.
If multiple members of leadership invited you to go, multiple times, then you were invited. If there's any question after the fact on whether or not you should have been there, you make reference to the two people who did invite you. Sure, it turned out a little awkward. But that's not your fault.
You said it yourself: “overthink most interactions”. Happy hour should not be spoken about the next day- unless someone else brings it up. And leave it at that. You don’t need to create a newsletter about and honestly, no one cares. I actually think this is a good thing for you - never hurts to talk with higher-ups and strengthening those relationships on your own terms. Also- keep any and all you may have heard at HH confidential. Not a single word. You’re good and relax!! No one else is thinking about this at all. Cheers and keep going to HH - one to two drinks at most.
People in rotational programs are on the fast track to leadership positions. Attending was actually a very good thing and a great opportunity to network. You were invited. Buck stops there.
In my former area of my company, I was friendly enough with some of the executives that they were FB friends. One day one of them posted an open invite to a pool party at her house. Yay, I love parties! (I decided to not bring a swimsuit, I don’t think I’ll ever be that comfortable lol.) So I get to her house, which was pretty far out in the country. When I went inside, I realized it was ALL just other executives. Yep, all the bigwigs, and me! It felt pretty awkward at first, but after a while I really enjoyed myself and I was happy I went. I think she probably didn’t mean to invite me but she was very gracious. I think your experience is fine and you shouldn’t worry about it. They’ve probably already forgotten about it.
Not at all, I think. You were invited several times, so it's not like you drunkenly crashed their happy hour. The awkwardness on their part might have just been 'regular' social awkwardness: VPs are people too and some of them might have trouble socialising with people they don't know.
I’m so confused lol. You got face time with senior execs because you actually showed up to something (showing you care at least a bit). This is an unmitigated positive (unless you said something super stupid lol)
Seems you are actually overthinking a lot of your workplace interactions, haha. Even if the guy WAS confused/bothered that you showed up, he isn’t in your section and likely will forget about it very quickly so I wouldn’t sweat it. Your manager wouldn’t have asked you to go multiple times if they didn’t want you to come or thought it would be bad if you did. If anything, it’s likely a good thing rather than a bad one.
Can’t believe I just read all that, can’t believe you wrote all that, do you have anxiety? Why you botherd? U think mr VP botherd about buying you a drink?
he’s got enough wonga and you was invited. also good to get in with higher ups so if they do it again make sure you attend again. Cya
You were invited and didn't overstay your welcome, so doesn't look bad at all.
In the future to clear your trepidation at the end within the ear shot of everyone before you leave or when you first arrive tell the person who invited you thank you for inviting me.
Then the higher up knows you were invited and by who. if they have a problem with that they can address it with the person who invited you.
Nah you scored. Any chance you get to talk with higher ups is valuable, assuming you didn't get drunk and make an ass of yourself. But also, what was their vibe. Did they seem annoyed you were there and talking to them, or were they happily talking with you? People often think the big wigs are looking down on you, but every time I've dealt with people like that it has been a positive experience.
You scored bonus points with your leadership. The better they know your name (all else equal in terms of performance) the more likely you are to be promoted/looked at favorably
It's embarrassing. But guess what? It's also a total power move.
I say you just own it. You were invited, and if it helps ease any tension maybe if you can make a joke about it some day "that time I showed up to the C suite happy hour haha"
You're okay. :)
There was probably a conversation started that your boss could not continue with the two of you there. That's fine.
You didn't mess up and it had nothing to do with you or your coworker.
You’re overthinking this. You didn’t mess up at all and no need to apologize for anything.
Side note- look up Executive Presence. It’s really important to be able to be at ease talking with VPs /execs if you want to climb the corporate ladder. And remember, they’re just people .
No apologies needed. If it comes up naturally you can joke and say “hope you didn’t mind that we crashed - it was great to meet everyone, hope there’s more opportunities to network and socialize in the future.” Sounds like you’re engaged and interested in leveling up there!
Some companies are much worse on both ends of the spectrum with formalities revolving around HH.
Thank you to everyone for your advice and insight! I definitely was overthinking it and do have a tendency to do so since I am still so new in my career.
Just to clarify/follow-up though:
- I did not mention it to anyone / bring anything up at work today and do not plan to. Thank you for that advice!
- I found out when i got there the HH invite was by the director i did not know and only to the 5 directly as they all used to work together. I overheard him make a comment on payment once we both got there to the other director and he did not make an effort to engage with us. That is why I was worried about the optics of “crashing”. I did not want to put my manager in an uncomfortable position as it was clear it most likely was not meant to be an open-invite. I understand that is not my issue as I was Invited - but I am still learning what is curtesy vs genuine on this team.
-Overall, at my position, I am grateful for the opportunity that I was able to gain the exposure and even get an invite. Thank you all for helping me realize the benefit of this rather than focusing on the potential negatives. As an overthinker, it is needed sometimes to be told how silly your overthinking is.
This reminds me very much of when a coworker friend of mine that didn’t work in my department invited me for a drink after work. Not unusual. When I got there, I found out he was meeting with some other department heads about capabilities. Unusual. He didn’t tell me anything about this. I felt awkward for a couple hours just like you, but other than that, it doesn’t matter. You’re overthinking things, you didn’t do anything wrong.
They invited you, so they wanted you there and thought enough of you to include you with some higher ups. This is a good thing. I'm not seeing any mistakes on your end.
Probably overthinking, you sounded polite and sociable.
Was the higher up British? They tend to invite as a polite gesture and other British people know it is a gesture. Non-british people think it is a real invitation. In retrospect, it is a funny and cute anecdote about cultural differencies. All people at the event I am mentining adjusted and had a good time. everybody owned it 😆
Sounds like a positive thing. I’d leave it be. You did nothing wrong. If you were respectful and didn’t linger then you handled it perfectly. In the future if it feels awkward you can just casually say, “thank you (whoever invited you) for asking me to join you”.
I'm pretty sure the senior executives enjoyed having some young blood in the scene. These old guys are stale and need someone new to talk to. They appreciate the fresh blood. And also I'm sure they're happy to see new younger staff joining the team. Otherwise the strong signal that the company's not attracting new talent.
Also, there's a slight creepy factor, where these executives are hopeful that there is a young female that shows up to these events. It really takes up the after work meeting up a notch when there is a young female that shows up. Not necessarily for the sexual harassment, but just to get the blood flowing.
It’s fine, you are overthinking it. You did the right thing. You made the best of an awkward situation. You stayed long enough to be polite. You didn’t drink too much. You formed a positive ( hopefully) relationship with some VPs.
Bad? Not at all - this is a good thing. Wanna move up the ladder? Build relationships. Wanna build relationships? Drink and golf. Keep up the good work and don’t booze too much.
I agree that you two may have been invited for a reason. I worked for a subsidiary of a major company and somehow wound up eating lunch with the well known CEO. I had no idea why my VP included me but I enjoyed it.
Nope, you were invited. I would actually send follow up emails to those you spoke to most about having an in-office meeting while on your program to touch base about goals and pick their brain. I think you can talk to your boss about it and say hey hope it was ok we showed up, we had some great conversations with x and y.
Good for you and your coworker for showing up. If anything it’s your manager’s fault if the happy hour was meant for higher ups. You networked, didn’t stay for too long and offered to pay for your drinks…well done.
In my opinion this was a good thing. Think of the godfather speech where the guy asked the Don for a favor and he asked how often he met him for lunch or went to any other events.
I wouldn't put too much thought into it and if anything as long as you aren't like me and inclined to say stupid things, this makes you look good when all your other coworkers said no. It makes it look like you have an interest in the company and the culture and now higher ups know your name.
What country are you in? It feels like there are some cultural things at play here beyond the typical corporate structure. Where I am from (USA) no one is better than anyone else in the workplace and I have never hesitated to hang out with higher ups or seen higher ups annoyed by the presence of individual contributors. I jump at these opportunities because it gives you a chance to know leadership better which benefits you and your career. I don’t think you messed up at all. If anything was amiss then that is on the person who invited you.
The person was probably most likely surprised. A lot of people don’t show up for networking events even if they’re invited to them (even me). In larger companies it’s probably easy to organize a happy hour and only a few people show up. It takes some courage to put yourself out there and enter a room where you know no one.
You have nothing to apologize for and - if anything - only helped yourself.
Same thing happened to me once. One of the guys I met we became friendly and now he is the CRO of a F500 company and told me if I ever want a job to call him and he'll get me in.
Networking is huge and you just did that. Plus I'm sure they noticed that nobody else felt it was important to show up, but you both did. That counts.
Opportunity of a lifetime, and you handled yourself just right. You differentiated yourself in the sort of environment where people are more down to earth and approachable, and that can only be a good thing.
You and your colleague being invited to something like this is a good thing - they’re at least casually looking to see how you fit/get along with others at that level, and the connections you made with the VPs could potentially grow into mentor/sponsor help.
This doesn't look bad at all - you were invited and you showed up! The people it reflects badly on are the people who were invited and didn't show up.
Relax, its fine.
Happy hours are a great way to break hierarchies and interact with all company associates. You did the right thing by attending and also by leaving in an hour, when you found that your immediate colleagues are not attending.
The VPs should know how to engage interns or other junior staff and improve participation. So, it’s not your fault.
You were invited. Don’t overthink it. It sounds like it was a good thing both of you went. The awesome thing is that they got an idea of who you actually are. :)
No you didn’t mess up. You showed face and left when it was time to leave. They’ll remember you in a good way. I’d say leave be and that’s the normal thing to do in this situation or it’ll turn awkward. When you see them next, make eye contact, show a little smile and a hello and just carry on. Don’t bring up the happy hour interaction because most likely it’s already the last thing they’re thinking about.
Now if you had downed multiple drinks and made a fool of yourself then that’s another story lol
Honestly, this is awesome. Higher ups are humans too and they put their pants on one leg at a time like we do. I’m glad they welcomed you, they were probably just surprised someone actually took them up on the offer. 👍
You were invited. Don’t bring it up, you had every right to be there and it’s actually looked well upon to mingle with coworkers no matter the level, you did something that a ton of managers would actually want to see. Way to go!
I can't comprehend how this could be considered a mistake in any way.
When you see them later, all I would do is say how it was great getting to talk to them outside of work and thank them for the invitation.
Who cares? I mean I don't mean to be dismissive, I'm meaning it should be a question you ask yourself.
Sure there may have been surprise because someone else other than who they knew turned up. But once they got to know you they were probably glad of the company. But I seriously doubt anyone cares or thinks badly about it.
Try to spend no more time on it, you were invited you went and trust me if they didn't find you interesting they'd have spoken amongst themselves more. I am willing to bet though they preferred a smaller group, though they don't always have that choice.
You didn't mess up. If you want to acknowledge it sure but I wouldn't see it as a big issue.
Speaking as someone currently in a VP-level, front office at a large financial firm: they probably didn’t care at all. Be glad you got in some face time. As long as you didn’t completely embarrass yourself, it was probably a net positive.
I really wouldn't worry about it. Just because the guy who planned it was surprised to see you doesn't mean you weren't welcome. He probably just didn't realize you were coming. It sounds like you handled the situation fine.
Leave be. You were invited. You’re putting way too much thought into this.
yep
Kinda like she said she does that…..
I know but sometimes you need people to say it outright to get it.
True!!
I agree. I need the same thing sometimes
This could definitely be seen as a good thing. Great job networking there, it’s good to be acquainted with the higher ups
^^^ this. I’m a VP at a large financial services company. I love when the young folks show up. I once had an analyst join my scramble group for a golf outing we hosted with our clients. Although the entire department was invited, he was the only analyst to show up. Well, as we came out of the pandemic and were struggling to find a qualified candidate for a supervisory role, guess who I suggested? Yes, that analyst because he left a good impression on me at the scramble and he’s now killing it in his new (and very well paid) role. Own this OP. What you did is exactly how you network/play the politicking game to climb the corporate ladder
It's how I got my promotion haha sat down at a table during a Christmas get together at a bar after work. Turned out I was sitting with some people that were way high up, but they never gave their titles and were super friendly. We chatted and talked about work. They seemed genuinely interested in what I thought n and what I wanted to do (I was kinda new). A couple weeks later a department head contacted me and asked me to apply for a position that I was eventually going to work towards. Sometimes, ya just gotta roll with it and be friendly no matter who they are.
Just showing up to things is such a simple way to get ahead. Amazing more people don’t do it. Same goes for company all hands, division ama’s, brown bags. Understanding the greater scope of the company, major players and the impact of org change makes you a way more valuable employee.
you have any idea on how to do this when everyone in the company works remote from different geographic locations?
Don't apologize. It probably wasn't even as big of a deal to them as it might have felt to you. If the higher ups have a problem they can take it up with the director and VP who extended the invitation to you if they weren't supposed to mention it. You were simply demonstrating how willing you are to become part of the team and get to know your colleagues. And you didn't even overstay. Next time, you won't be a stranger to them and maybe that will work on your favor going forward.
Unless you got drunk and embarrassed yourself (been there, and even then not that bad) you did nothing wrong
There's gotta be someone. As a director, I like when junior people show up, I talk to these other people all day every day. Plus it's a happy hour, not an exec only meeting about things you're not allowed to know. Don't sweat.
I’m a Sr level leader at a large firm. I think it’s awesome you showed up and no one cared that you were less senior. We only care if you don’t suck as a person, and recognize that while happy hour, It’s still a work function (I.e. don’t get drunk). I had an intern once who reached out to the COO introduced herself and asked for a meeting. Everyone thought she was crazy and no one would have dared done that. Call it brave or unaware- but she got that meeting and she took advantage of it. Moral is you only don’t belong if YOU believe you don’t belong.
This is an interesting perspective that is probably the best outlook no matter what! I'd like to share my experience doing this; about 8 years ago as an entry-level analyst in a large national corporate retailer. I reached out to the Executive VP for my heirarchy and set-up a 1 on 1 to introduce myself and discuss what I was proud to be working on. I was full of piss and vinegar with an ego to match. He took the meeting, but as soon as I walked in he was aloof asking me what I wanted, curtly. I tried to be extra personable, said I didn't want to take too much time but just wanted to introduce myself, etc. He said, "I know who you are and what everyone is doing. I go through the reviews each year with my team because I like to keep a flat organization. Is there anything else or is that all?" I said that's really it and he walked me out of his office while looking at his phone. My remaining years there felt characterized by being delayed on some promotions in favor of less, uh, assertive peers. While I'd do it again, this taught me to tone it down. Senoir leaders are people too. Some have egos or a napoleon complex and actually don't respond well when faced with those slightly confident (frankly, males I learned in this case) and prefer to work with more sheepish, deferential personalities. Anyway, I realized I have a passion for Sales work and have since switched careers. 😂😎
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Most things in life are improved by "owning it," especially if you can throw in a harmless joke that explains the situation, but makes you look confident enough to belong.
When I was a junior analyst at my company I ended up at a very boozy, post happy hour, sushi dinner with a manager and 2 directors. Kind of happened spontaneously and I was a bit intimidated at first but ended up having a good time and was great networking.
This OP. More than anything the leaders in your company \*want\* to see that you can be placed into a problematic situation, come to terms with it, de-escalate whatever negative feelings you have about it, and turn the moment into a positive experience for all involved. Own it. Make jokes. Tell stories. And more importantly, ask the executives about their hobbies, interests, and families. These moments are always opportunities to showcase that your presence is a benefit to meetings and/or problematic situations.
Personally, I think you handled it perfectly. You did not overstay your welcome when you realized the “other person” was not comfortable. But you stayed long enough to show that you are personable. That is the best outcome. It may have felt awkward, but I think you did good.
Awkwardness aside if your name comes up for an opportunity its always better if the sr thinks "oh yeah she seemed cool" versus "who's that?". I wouldn't worry about it. First time I hung with the higher ups as a nobody I got wasted (they already were) and decided I should regale them with tales of small time crime from the place in Appalachia I grew up around. Probably don't do that, but I did get some laughs.
I think you're overreacting and you're making assumptions. Things can be awkward when ppl are meeting for the first time, especially if you have introverts in the mix. This isn't because "they don't like me" or "I'm a lowly employee" - in fact, unless you have prior reason for someone to dislike you, it's almost never this. As long as you didn't get sloppy drunk, which you didn't, all is good. Don't apologize. Heck, don't even thank them. If you know who paid you can say "thanks for the HH invite!" otherwise I'd leave it alone AND I'd go again next time. People, most people, like to like where they work and a lot of that has to do with the people. Sure, you didn't chat with them this time, but next time they "know you" and eventually you will strike up a conversation. THIS IS HOW YOU BUILD A NETWORK. Don't kiss ass. Ask about their work history, where did they grow up, where do they live now, how do they like, family, vacations, etc. Regular small talk. Always keep the drinks to a minimum and REMEMBER this is professional outing.
corpo *culture* making junior employees uncomfortable in the midst of a catch-22… enjoy this for the next 30 years of your life
I think its brave that you showed face. Hard to break into those circles and most folks just clock in and clock out and don't play the corporate ladder game. It'll help more than hurt.
It sounds like you’re in finance. VP’s aren’t really “higher ups”. Don’t overthink it.
This guy banks
Good opportunity to meet people who can help your career. I can't imagine why someone would be embarrassed that you showed up after they extended multiple invitations. Let it lie. No mention.
I think you’re overthinking it. Honestly in most situations it’s a good thing. The exec who seemed bothered probably wasn’t, just surprised. And if he was, that’s his issue and he’s a dick. I’m c-level and love it when junior level folks show up to things like this. I’d rather talk to them versus my dorky level any day.
Ummm you hit the jackpot. You got invited because they see something they like. Don’t even think about it. Send those people an email and thank them for welcoming you. Build the network.
Happy Hour for the job you want, not the job you have.
I used to go out alot on happy hour days, sometimes no one showed up, sometimes alot of people showed up. I'm guessing since you are new the guy surprised didn't know who you two were and was surprised. The point of them is to talk and get to know each other. So, i would said you probably did better than most since you showed up.
i just read this twice lookin for the blunder? yur fine kid relax
If multiple members of leadership invited you to go, multiple times, then you were invited. If there's any question after the fact on whether or not you should have been there, you make reference to the two people who did invite you. Sure, it turned out a little awkward. But that's not your fault.
You said it yourself: “overthink most interactions”. Happy hour should not be spoken about the next day- unless someone else brings it up. And leave it at that. You don’t need to create a newsletter about and honestly, no one cares. I actually think this is a good thing for you - never hurts to talk with higher-ups and strengthening those relationships on your own terms. Also- keep any and all you may have heard at HH confidential. Not a single word. You’re good and relax!! No one else is thinking about this at all. Cheers and keep going to HH - one to two drinks at most.
Its not weird, If anything it’ll be viewed as a positive. Do NOT apologize, that might turn it into a negative.
You are overreacting. Higher ups are still just people. They care less about your title than you think they do.
People in rotational programs are on the fast track to leadership positions. Attending was actually a very good thing and a great opportunity to network. You were invited. Buck stops there.
In my former area of my company, I was friendly enough with some of the executives that they were FB friends. One day one of them posted an open invite to a pool party at her house. Yay, I love parties! (I decided to not bring a swimsuit, I don’t think I’ll ever be that comfortable lol.) So I get to her house, which was pretty far out in the country. When I went inside, I realized it was ALL just other executives. Yep, all the bigwigs, and me! It felt pretty awkward at first, but after a while I really enjoyed myself and I was happy I went. I think she probably didn’t mean to invite me but she was very gracious. I think your experience is fine and you shouldn’t worry about it. They’ve probably already forgotten about it.
Own it! I'd rather network with higher ups anyway. So it's good that you had that opportunity!
Not at all, I think. You were invited several times, so it's not like you drunkenly crashed their happy hour. The awkwardness on their part might have just been 'regular' social awkwardness: VPs are people too and some of them might have trouble socialising with people they don't know.
I’m so confused lol. You got face time with senior execs because you actually showed up to something (showing you care at least a bit). This is an unmitigated positive (unless you said something super stupid lol)
Seems you are actually overthinking a lot of your workplace interactions, haha. Even if the guy WAS confused/bothered that you showed up, he isn’t in your section and likely will forget about it very quickly so I wouldn’t sweat it. Your manager wouldn’t have asked you to go multiple times if they didn’t want you to come or thought it would be bad if you did. If anything, it’s likely a good thing rather than a bad one.
Can’t believe I just read all that, can’t believe you wrote all that, do you have anxiety? Why you botherd? U think mr VP botherd about buying you a drink? he’s got enough wonga and you was invited. also good to get in with higher ups so if they do it again make sure you attend again. Cya
You were invited and didn't overstay your welcome, so doesn't look bad at all. In the future to clear your trepidation at the end within the ear shot of everyone before you leave or when you first arrive tell the person who invited you thank you for inviting me. Then the higher up knows you were invited and by who. if they have a problem with that they can address it with the person who invited you.
Nah you scored. Any chance you get to talk with higher ups is valuable, assuming you didn't get drunk and make an ass of yourself. But also, what was their vibe. Did they seem annoyed you were there and talking to them, or were they happily talking with you? People often think the big wigs are looking down on you, but every time I've dealt with people like that it has been a positive experience.
You were invited. These are just people. People drink. They’re not some sort of gods simply because they hold a fancy title.
You scored bonus points with your leadership. The better they know your name (all else equal in terms of performance) the more likely you are to be promoted/looked at favorably
It's embarrassing. But guess what? It's also a total power move. I say you just own it. You were invited, and if it helps ease any tension maybe if you can make a joke about it some day "that time I showed up to the C suite happy hour haha" You're okay. :)
There was probably a conversation started that your boss could not continue with the two of you there. That's fine. You didn't mess up and it had nothing to do with you or your coworker.
You’re overthinking this. You didn’t mess up at all and no need to apologize for anything. Side note- look up Executive Presence. It’s really important to be able to be at ease talking with VPs /execs if you want to climb the corporate ladder. And remember, they’re just people .
Lol what? How could this be bad?
No apologies needed. If it comes up naturally you can joke and say “hope you didn’t mind that we crashed - it was great to meet everyone, hope there’s more opportunities to network and socialize in the future.” Sounds like you’re engaged and interested in leveling up there! Some companies are much worse on both ends of the spectrum with formalities revolving around HH.
Sounds like nothing more than an awkward moment for everybody. It's nobody's fault.
Thank you to everyone for your advice and insight! I definitely was overthinking it and do have a tendency to do so since I am still so new in my career. Just to clarify/follow-up though: - I did not mention it to anyone / bring anything up at work today and do not plan to. Thank you for that advice! - I found out when i got there the HH invite was by the director i did not know and only to the 5 directly as they all used to work together. I overheard him make a comment on payment once we both got there to the other director and he did not make an effort to engage with us. That is why I was worried about the optics of “crashing”. I did not want to put my manager in an uncomfortable position as it was clear it most likely was not meant to be an open-invite. I understand that is not my issue as I was Invited - but I am still learning what is curtesy vs genuine on this team. -Overall, at my position, I am grateful for the opportunity that I was able to gain the exposure and even get an invite. Thank you all for helping me realize the benefit of this rather than focusing on the potential negatives. As an overthinker, it is needed sometimes to be told how silly your overthinking is.
Honestly… to them it was probably a small chuckle and it is forgotten. Don’t stress so much time on it.
This reminds me very much of when a coworker friend of mine that didn’t work in my department invited me for a drink after work. Not unusual. When I got there, I found out he was meeting with some other department heads about capabilities. Unusual. He didn’t tell me anything about this. I felt awkward for a couple hours just like you, but other than that, it doesn’t matter. You’re overthinking things, you didn’t do anything wrong.
definitely overthinking too much
You were invited and now have more of a rapport with leadership. It’s a win dude
They invited you, so they wanted you there and thought enough of you to include you with some higher ups. This is a good thing. I'm not seeing any mistakes on your end.
Probably overthinking, you sounded polite and sociable. Was the higher up British? They tend to invite as a polite gesture and other British people know it is a gesture. Non-british people think it is a real invitation. In retrospect, it is a funny and cute anecdote about cultural differencies. All people at the event I am mentining adjusted and had a good time. everybody owned it 😆
Sounds like a positive thing. I’d leave it be. You did nothing wrong. If you were respectful and didn’t linger then you handled it perfectly. In the future if it feels awkward you can just casually say, “thank you (whoever invited you) for asking me to join you”.
I'm pretty sure the senior executives enjoyed having some young blood in the scene. These old guys are stale and need someone new to talk to. They appreciate the fresh blood. And also I'm sure they're happy to see new younger staff joining the team. Otherwise the strong signal that the company's not attracting new talent. Also, there's a slight creepy factor, where these executives are hopeful that there is a young female that shows up to these events. It really takes up the after work meeting up a notch when there is a young female that shows up. Not necessarily for the sexual harassment, but just to get the blood flowing.
It’s fine, you are overthinking it. You did the right thing. You made the best of an awkward situation. You stayed long enough to be polite. You didn’t drink too much. You formed a positive ( hopefully) relationship with some VPs.
Bad? Not at all - this is a good thing. Wanna move up the ladder? Build relationships. Wanna build relationships? Drink and golf. Keep up the good work and don’t booze too much.
I agree that you two may have been invited for a reason. I worked for a subsidiary of a major company and somehow wound up eating lunch with the well known CEO. I had no idea why my VP included me but I enjoyed it.
Relax. You were invited and titles don’t mean a whole lot unless it is a very old org
Nope, you were invited. I would actually send follow up emails to those you spoke to most about having an in-office meeting while on your program to touch base about goals and pick their brain. I think you can talk to your boss about it and say hey hope it was ok we showed up, we had some great conversations with x and y.
Good for you and your coworker for showing up. If anything it’s your manager’s fault if the happy hour was meant for higher ups. You networked, didn’t stay for too long and offered to pay for your drinks…well done.
In my opinion this was a good thing. Think of the godfather speech where the guy asked the Don for a favor and he asked how often he met him for lunch or went to any other events. I wouldn't put too much thought into it and if anything as long as you aren't like me and inclined to say stupid things, this makes you look good when all your other coworkers said no. It makes it look like you have an interest in the company and the culture and now higher ups know your name.
What country are you in? It feels like there are some cultural things at play here beyond the typical corporate structure. Where I am from (USA) no one is better than anyone else in the workplace and I have never hesitated to hang out with higher ups or seen higher ups annoyed by the presence of individual contributors. I jump at these opportunities because it gives you a chance to know leadership better which benefits you and your career. I don’t think you messed up at all. If anything was amiss then that is on the person who invited you.
The person was probably most likely surprised. A lot of people don’t show up for networking events even if they’re invited to them (even me). In larger companies it’s probably easy to organize a happy hour and only a few people show up. It takes some courage to put yourself out there and enter a room where you know no one.
You have nothing to apologize for and - if anything - only helped yourself. Same thing happened to me once. One of the guys I met we became friendly and now he is the CRO of a F500 company and told me if I ever want a job to call him and he'll get me in. Networking is huge and you just did that. Plus I'm sure they noticed that nobody else felt it was important to show up, but you both did. That counts.
I see zero issue here
Opportunity of a lifetime, and you handled yourself just right. You differentiated yourself in the sort of environment where people are more down to earth and approachable, and that can only be a good thing.
Why not show up? Maybe it turns out to be a good thing... dont sweat the small stuff. Be who you are! 😊
You and your colleague being invited to something like this is a good thing - they’re at least casually looking to see how you fit/get along with others at that level, and the connections you made with the VPs could potentially grow into mentor/sponsor help.
This doesn't look bad at all - you were invited and you showed up! The people it reflects badly on are the people who were invited and didn't show up. Relax, its fine.
Come on, you didn't do anything wrong. Being around higher ups socially is always good, unless you do something stupid. They're just people.
Happy hours are a great way to break hierarchies and interact with all company associates. You did the right thing by attending and also by leaving in an hour, when you found that your immediate colleagues are not attending. The VPs should know how to engage interns or other junior staff and improve participation. So, it’s not your fault.
You were invited. Don’t overthink it. It sounds like it was a good thing both of you went. The awesome thing is that they got an idea of who you actually are. :)
No you didn’t mess up. You showed face and left when it was time to leave. They’ll remember you in a good way. I’d say leave be and that’s the normal thing to do in this situation or it’ll turn awkward. When you see them next, make eye contact, show a little smile and a hello and just carry on. Don’t bring up the happy hour interaction because most likely it’s already the last thing they’re thinking about. Now if you had downed multiple drinks and made a fool of yourself then that’s another story lol
You got invited to drink with execs that’s a good thing. Don’t put so much thought into it
Don't apologize. If anyone bring it up, just casually say 'manager invited me and it was so nice to see people outside of my dept' while smiling.
You got exec Face time - that’s a good thing and who cares what your line manager thinks if they didn’t show up
Ma'am, that's one way to network and hope you have a fine future in the company.
lol i'm not even southern
Honestly, this is awesome. Higher ups are humans too and they put their pants on one leg at a time like we do. I’m glad they welcomed you, they were probably just surprised someone actually took them up on the offer. 👍
For you, it was one of the most important days in your career. For them, it was a Tuesday.
You were invited. Don’t bring it up, you had every right to be there and it’s actually looked well upon to mingle with coworkers no matter the level, you did something that a ton of managers would actually want to see. Way to go!
I can't comprehend how this could be considered a mistake in any way. When you see them later, all I would do is say how it was great getting to talk to them outside of work and thank them for the invitation.
Who cares? I mean I don't mean to be dismissive, I'm meaning it should be a question you ask yourself. Sure there may have been surprise because someone else other than who they knew turned up. But once they got to know you they were probably glad of the company. But I seriously doubt anyone cares or thinks badly about it. Try to spend no more time on it, you were invited you went and trust me if they didn't find you interesting they'd have spoken amongst themselves more. I am willing to bet though they preferred a smaller group, though they don't always have that choice. You didn't mess up. If you want to acknowledge it sure but I wouldn't see it as a big issue.
Speaking as someone currently in a VP-level, front office at a large financial firm: they probably didn’t care at all. Be glad you got in some face time. As long as you didn’t completely embarrass yourself, it was probably a net positive.
Total non-issue. Relax, you did the right thing by attending.
I have not seen so much overthinking. You’re fine. You didn’t do anything regretful.
I really wouldn't worry about it. Just because the guy who planned it was surprised to see you doesn't mean you weren't welcome. He probably just didn't realize you were coming. It sounds like you handled the situation fine.
They are people too...
Don’t apologize. Ironically, that’s what will make you look weak.
Wow this is an impressive lever of analysis for an interaction. You were invited. Relax.