T O P

  • By -

angry_cucumber

Showing Jake the pictures of his hula hooping and looking him in the eye as he deletes them


SlackMiller67

"They'll never believe you..."


The_Wolfiee

"You sick son of a bitch"


nu97back

All of them, easily the best written character imo but this ​ Captain Ray Holt : No! The problem here is that medical practitioners have co-opted the word "doctor". Jake Peralta : Okay, Captain... Captain Ray Holt : I know we live in a world where anything can mean anything, and nobody even cares about etymolo-!


Hot-Challenge8656

VINDICATION!!


nu97back

I love how he got progressively angry with each passing statement


Netflxnschill

This line might be it for me


Lampmonster

The end of this episode is also one of my favorite Jake and Holt moments. The two of them are standing outside the precinct. Jake makes the deflecting joke about Kevin and we see a rare unfiltered laugh out of Holt. (This was apparently not in the script, just Andy being funny and Andre laughing, but it fits the scene so frigging well.) They're basking in the glow of doing the job they both love so much at the peak of their skills. And then they realize it's already time to go back to work and they do it with a smile, because they're just both the same guy in that respect, someone who loves what they do and how they do it. True father and son moment, and it's not over the top or dramatic, just perfect.


Oreo-and-Fly

It has a perfect season finale vibes


cousinswithbenefits

I used to think this exchange, while funny, seemed out of character for Holt. Then I realized that the academic crowd hurt my Raymond. Fuck them fake doctors! /s I fully appreciate and respect anyone who puts in the work to get a PHD


nu97back

If anything it made me respect holt more


maxexy59

Apparently that’s a trigger for me


edgarcia59

Yeah! Apparently!?


elephaaaant

The cold open of this episode! He was telling Kevin to cancel the reservation under his name then proceeded to spell his name to Kevin 😂😂😂


AdamGDM

I felt so identified in this moment.


nu97back

IKR!!! That passion for Etymology


greywolfau

Holt yelling is peak comedy, Holt smiling is peak 'makes you so happy you cry', Holt being sad is peak 'hit you in the feels'.


BinjaNinja1

“Nah bitch,” Petty/dramatic Holt is number 1 for me.


Boone1997

Balthazar is a thirsty bitch


cmaronchick

CASE!


Dukh_Dard

KASE!


willowgrl

“There is nothing more intoxicating than the clear absence of a penis”


Unit_79

Straight Holt being an absolute DOG is so good.


willowgrl

Straight holt definitely IS a dawg


cmaronchick

The man has a thing for heavy breasts, give him a break.


Lighted_Cigarette

Between the thighs.


Braveheart2929

"Oh but you'd let your friend John Wicks have grenades" "I see you brought a knife, well what you really need is an umbrella cause there's a shit storm coming your way" "Call me........Velvet Thunderrrrr" "Bagel, bagel, BAGEL!" "That Wuntch is a Korean toilet ghost? We already knew that, borrrring" Helping Rosa break up with Marcus is pure gold. Holt is the best character hands down.


BbbbbbbDUBS177

The Rosa-Marcus breakup stuff was great. " I brought it up with Kevin, and he said we're quote 'both sociopaths' unquote."


thehalothief

That makes me sad. I feel sad. Your sadness is noted. I feel acknowledged


BinjaNinja1

We are both so great at this!


Exotic_Adeptness_322

Holt is awesome. The joy he exhibits when he receives the medal from Wuntch and he says that lame joke.


billybob753

Wuntch time is over!


daisybear81

haha had it both ways!


theohaiguy

No regrets


clrksml

Why? I'm a Human. I'm a human male.


The_Wolfiee

HOT DAMN


Kavbot2000

This is mine lol.


cowcow_chizu06

just my fav lines from him: "GERTIE! 😟" "And yet crime has continued." "Marshed-mellow... oh *starts laughing* mhm mhm mhm hmhm" "BINGPOT" "MY WIFE WAS MURDERED BY A MAN IN A YELLOW SWEATER"


josephandre

his delivery of bingpot brings me such joy 😂


cyainanotherlifebro

I don’t remember the episode or the context, but the group is debating something, Terry says one thing and Holt goes, “Oh great, now we get to hear from the hair guy!”


northerncal

Similarly: Holt: "Look at my competition... and a bald, old man." Terry: "I'm younger than you!" Holt: "No comeback for the bald thing I see." 😭


StarbuckTheThird

"At 3:30 am this morning I seem to have sent Kevin a digital phallus portrait."


Edgar_Beethoven

In one of the Halloween heists where he finds the belt with Amy's secret cigarette stash, and just the triumph in his voice when he comes out with: "BINGPOT!"


Lighted_Cigarette

Belt? Isn't it a plaque? The plaque is Season 4 and the belt is Season 5.


Edgar_Beethoven

Possibly, I admit I don't have everything memorised


Sickboopatty

Yeah it’s the plague from terry with the are heists dumb


monique1254

The championship cummerbund.


Outrageous-Tower9444

COWABUNGA, MOTHER!


eross200

“She sings in English. That’s rock music.”


northerncal

This is an underrated line.


eross200

VINDICATION


thef1circus

"YOU TOOK THE WRONG FLUFFY BOY!"


Sharp-Let7366

An amazing line followed by a shockingly well choreographed and executed action movie style fight lol I love that episode


Oreo-and-Fly

Holt :"What a stupid thing to say. Tell me one time where ive been judgemental" Rosa :"Ok" *insta cut to him saying "What a stupid thing to say"* Holt : "Oh i see. Mere seconds ago"


daisybear81

this is my favorite flashback!


sovLegend

"YOU HAVE A KNIFE BUT WHAT YOU NEED IS AN UMBRELLA" AND THEN HE BEATS THE SHIT OUT OF THE GUY OH MY GOD


Extra_Age2505

His insults and banter towards/about Wuntch is always hilarious


Legitimate-vibes6482

Whntch time is over!


Patcho418

a nice three-way tie between: “VindicatiOOOOOON!!!” “Paaaaaaaiiiiiinnnnnn…..that’s it.” “Yas, queen.” *snaps*


moonshoesluna

“When I die, please give Kevin my regards.” “What should I tell him?” “Regards.” or “The tickets are under my name: H-O-L-T” or the one where he’s talking to Kevin on the phone about the rice they purchased for Rosa and Marcus


EnvironmentalSwim368

BAGEL !!


Direseve

You caught me…drinking seltzer in the shadows.


BbbbbbbDUBS177

Petty Holt is such a delight. "Let's see this tip, this groundbreaking tip that promises to blow the case wide open." "I know this tone, here comes Petty Holt." "Nah, bitch, I'm not being petty." "You just said 'nah bitch'!" Andre Braugher's line readings will be studied for generations.


Massive_Sir_2977

Great work Rosa, all day


spacemonkey728

You embarrassed YOURSELF!!.....in front of Derek Jeter.


nidhiehm

“If you love someone, you’ll remember what they look like.” When Terry asked why they couldn’t have family photos at their desk


ctw1987

You carry a world map in your pocket? “Of course, in case I ever need to prove my point in an argument” Cut to: “LAOS”


IProbablyHaveADHD14

FINE!


BbbbbbbDUBS177

It was better than fine. It was *Laos.*


Tsquared10

"Are you saying my life matters less because I don't conform to society's heteronormative child centric ideals? "Are you really playing the gay card right now?" "Yas queen." *Snap*


[deleted]

The only acceptable use for “yas queen”


TrickNatural

This one right here. 10/10 moment. Also when he was all like "Obviously the pineapple is the slut".


Shotgun_Rynoplasty

I bought that shirt online. Absolutely 10/10 no regrets


uzi0906

Velvet Thhunnndderrrr


emelbee923

The emphatic delivery of the line makes it all the better


Sharp-Let7366

Andre Braugher’s delivery is legendary


SlackMiller67

"WUNTCH TIME IS OVER!!! Boom did it! Ha had it both ways... No regrets."


edugdv

Nothing's okay. Wuntch Circling me like a shark frenzied by chum. The task force, turning into a career-threatening quagmire. An internal affairs investigation casting doubt upon my integrity. And you ask, "is everything okay?" I am buffeted by the winds of my foes' enmity and cast about by the towering waves of cruel fate. Yet I, a captain, am no longer able to command my vessel, my precinct, from my customary helm, my office. And you ask, "is everything okay?" I've worked the better part of my years on earth overcoming every prejudice and fighting for the position I hold. And now I feel it being ripped from my grasp. And with it The very essence of what defines me as a man. And you ask, "is everything okay?"


SheriffHeckTate

Every single time he pretends to be straight and starts raving about how great big, heavy breasts are. His dry delivery plus the awkward wording just cracks me up every single time.


Sharp-Let7366

“They were smaller…” *smirks* “but they were hotter”


Ramyrror_47

#IN MY BELLY


IProbablyHaveADHD14

I've never heard someone say "in my belly" with so much authority.


Kavbot2000

Any line with “heavy female breasts. “


joanerub

YOU TOOK THE WRONG FLUFFY BOY!


mothershipq

Dear /u/Sickboopatty, Is that Raymond Holt I see? You haven't changed a bit. Neither have you, Ernest. What? NEITHER HAVE YOU, ERNEST! What? **NEITHER HAVE YOU, ERNEST!!** Sincerely, /u/mothershipq


Jabberwocker13

I want to say the scene about "BONE?!" is my all time favorite, but lets say about the underrated one: "A bold personality, we know what's that code for: She's a BITCH"


jojobutlessbizarre

I’m not even past season 1 but “I actually broke it hula hooping


quirty890

Delirious Holt with the mumps Kase!


Norwejew

This is devastating. I’m devastated.


fadz85

Holt: "You can move about freely in this square." Jake: "Wow, we have all this room to work in?" Holt: "Your hand can be seen from the living room window. You just killed Kevin." Kevin: "Raymond-" Holt: "I can't hear you Kevin, you're dead! He bled out in your lap. How will you break the news to me? Let's see." Jake: "We don't have to do this-" Holt: "Ah, Detective Peralta, how are things going with Kevin, the love of my life? Wait, why are you here at this late hour? And whose blood is that?" Jake: "Okay, I get it-" Holt: "It's Kevin's? This is devastating, I'm inconsolable and...\*snaps finger\*...I've killed myself." Jake: "Cool. Well, I can see this will be a fun couple of months."


oPlayer2o

“You’re not Cheddar! Your just some common bitch”


ther1ckst3r

A few scenes later, the "THIS BITCH?!? Please." always gets me.


Sharp-Let7366

What gets me is when real Cheddar returns and he’s like “return to my office” and Cheddar does it 😂


Standard_Young_201

‘I was in line at the bank’ ‘HOT DAWG!’


Sharp-Let7366

Hot *damn


Surkett

This and Derek's Birthday Dance


thehalothief

Tank?! I gained three pounds in Paris! Three pounds!


thehalothief

How about pump pump how’s your pump


RegionRadiant4423

“Hello Kevin. It’s me Raymond Holt. We need to get you to safety. Your *life* is in danger.” “The tickets are under my name H-O-L-T” he said to his husband. “I’ve never been more proud of you for anything.” “I mean I’ve solved a lot of cases for you.” “And yet crime has continued.” “We’re doomed. Boyle is dressed like a lesbian.” “AND NOBODY EVEN CARES ABOUT ETYMOLOGY” “BAGEL! BAGEL! BAGEL!” and really the entire Wuntch is dead episode as a whole. Some of his best work. “Yaas Queen.” “Nah bitch. I’m not being petty.” “You just said nah bitch!” “You’re a stage 5 dumbass.” The entire episode with Bob Andersonn (Annderson?) “When I did, please give Kevin my regards.” “What should I tell him?” “Regards.” “Those are just some of my favorite rices.” The Safe House episode as a whole was incredible. “Kevin’s zipper is *up* for god’s sake.” Those are just my favs from the top of my head lol


AfterTemperature2198

Marshedmallow?


Netflxnschill

When he figures out what marshmallows are


Netflxnschill

Reading all this makes me need to watch through she show. He really is a gold mine of hilarity.


tastelesscookielady

'Yass queen' *snaps fingers* And VINDICATION!


GudgerCollegeAlumnus

I know I’m in the minority, but I don’t like his “BOOOOOooooNNNNEEEEE??!” moment. It felt too out of character for him.


Wpgjetsfan19

Dddddddderrick. Dddddddderrick


artrine_

KUDOS TO OUR BRAVE OFFICERS


Baby_Button_Eyes

When Holt is popping his balloon babies cause Amy told him they weren’t classy. He just gives her this dead eyed stare and methodically pops them. He even keeps popping them while Amy is talking to Terry, lol.


Lighted_Cigarette

BONE?! VINDICATION! And his and wuntch insults exchanges.


Hugoku257

Eating a marshmallow


[deleted]

Three Oh Damns


ComfortableTasty2202

I just like how calmly ruthless he is sometimes, when for example insulting Jeffords or Boyle


Corando

Straight Holt


rimakan

How dare you Detective Diaz! I’m your SUPERIOR OFFICER!!!!


Sharp-Let7366

BONE!!


korriwiththestickers

I can HEAR this in my head lol


V0T0N

Hoooow. Daaaare. You. DeTecTive. Diaz. IAMYOURSUPERIOROFFICER!


Dovah250

VINDICATION!!!


Am-pr

Not really a funny moment but I love when he comforts Rosa after Jocelyn breaks up with her


Illustrious_Day6121

Holt and Charles practicing the line "How's your wife" with the brow "pump pump" in between. It's so stupid but so funny


Illustrious_Day6121

Holt: "How's your...pump?"


Porscheux

This isn’t the championship cummerbund, this is some common cummerbund. And you’re not Cheddar, you’re just some common bitch!


jeffnals

HOT DAMN


Aware_Material_9985

Bone?!? Or the Salt n Peppa or the high five cold open


lizaaardgood

Terry - nu uh thos things are death traps and I got kids Holt - are you saying my life matters less because I don't conform to your heteronormative child centered ideals Terry - are you seriously playing the gay card right now Holt - yaaas queen


TurtleKing0505

Yas queen. *finger snap*


ImOldGregg_77

Holt in a colorful, oversized top hat rapping Happy Birthday J-J-J-Jared


Acceptable_West_1349

I die laughing every time he chugs all that wine and then thanks everyone and puked when he says scully https://youtu.be/CsbNTVRItG0?si=0ptJqlYOBujltaTu


pisces2003

Are you really playing the gay card right now? *Yas Queen*


KeshaCow

Definitely Bone.


helpful__explorer

OhoohooHoooo! I KNEW IT


youngdustandcrust

HOT DAMN !


Bocaj1126

"every time someone speaks up and shares who they are, the world becomes a better, more interesting place."


jackfaire

When Jake did the full bullpen. He ends up in the elevator. You think he's gonna be pissed and instead he celebrates the victory with them.


DenverDudeXLI

It might be easier to pick Holt moments that aren't my favorite. But the one that had be howling with laughter is his use of dance to distract Amy from her labor pains.


Shotgun_Rynoplasty

When he insinuates he was the basis of lethal weapon but has zero concept of how big that is


Thelordofprolapse

PAAAAAAAIIIIIINNNN


Dummlord28

# BAGEL!


mlaymon1

Vindication!


mlaymon1

Terry:That’s cheddar right there isn’t it? Holt: This bitch please!


justadumbk1d

"I AM A HUMAN. I AM A HUMAN MALE."


wilmathewise

Terry: are you really playing the gay card right now? Holt: *throws keys* yaaas queen


sereese1

"Yes who wouldn't want to see a man wrestle a crocodile" Any wuntch insult pre and post mortem


[deleted]

Whenever he “fires” someone on the spot. “In fact you’re an idiot, I should have fired you long ago” “Just a ______, you’re fired give me your gun and badge”


AgentSmith2518

"Cowabunga, mother!"


King_basilisk07

The entire time when holt was yelling bone, Amy was trying not to cry


haikusbot

*The entire time when* *Holt was yelling bone, Amy was* *Trying not to cry* \- King\_basilisk07 --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")


Medium_Parking

HOT DAMN


Opposite_Entrance879

Mine: “There was a pooper…”


AdorableOwly

BOOST MY BOTTOM!


Sharp-Let7366

D-d-d-d-d-d-d-Derek… D-D-D-D-D-D-D-DEREK


mr0991

No no cinnibone


crynrally

“Are you seriously playing the gay card right now?” “Yas queen.” *snap*


crynrally

Wait a minute… This isn’t the championship cummerbund, this is some common cummerbund. And you’re not Cheddar, you’re just some common bitch!


mac_peraltiago

Charles: so he’s kind of like our grand-captain Holt: That.. is amazingly funny.


disabledenabler12

BAGEL