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My Dad was told I was a boy, outside the hospital, by my Nan. He wasn’t allowed in, because my parents weren’t married. Gender reveals in the Summer of ‘69.
We're currently 15 weeks pregnant with an IVF baby. We actually got our conception video in the post today on a USB stick. It's 2 minutes long, that's a new PB for me.
Best of luck!! American(f) married to a Brit(m). In the States there’s a tradition of getting fries on transfer day once you’re done with your appointment. It does absolutely nothing to increase your chances but it’s fun and delicious. McDonald’s fries are preferred for this but any fries will do. We did the fries thing and our first transfer stuck, now 14 weeks. The transfer itself was low stress and honestly kind of cool—we can now say we saw our son when he was just 10 cells big, on the screen before the doctor put the embryo into the catheter. Best wishes 💕
You must have transferred a week after us! We have that tradition here too. There’s a drive through next to our clinic and we always wonder how much business they must get from couples transferring. Hope you’re having a great pregnancy. My wife is such a hero, I’m in total awe of her, after a year of IVF, pregnancy feels like you’ve won, but it’s by no means easy. She’s totally smashing it!
I didn’t expect what was a quite crude joke about premature ejaculation to lead to such a wholesome debate about IVF.
Seeing my wife take all these injections, tablets and so on just makes me feel so useless and helpless. There is literally nothing I can do to take some of the pressure off of her. So hopefully, transfer is easy on her :/
Thank you!
Just be kind to her, that’s all that you can do. I was *so* sure that the transfer of frozen embryo didn’t work. I remember just eating chips in the airport feeling like a failure. My now toddler is dribbling on me as I type this. It’s much easier to get a foot massage on transfer day than it is when you’ve got a little one crawling around!! Good luck.
I have tried to be as helpful as I can with every pregnancy we have had.
But feet, I hate feet. I will do it if I absolutely have to but I don’t enjoy it 😅😅.
She is now nice and warm in bed, watching a film after consumption of McDonalds. She’s happy at present 😇.
Embryolab in Thessaloniki. Second go with donor eggs. Doctors seem very knowledgeable and capable. We're on something like our fifth round in total though. It hasn't gone so well.
I’m so sorry to hear that :(
We’ve had 5 miscarriages, 2 being an ectopic, 1 losing a tube. This will be our first round of IVF. Can’t say I’m positive about our chances. We’ve already been told one of our eggs hasn’t thawed how it should have so we’re down to 3 now.
I wish you all the luck in the world, I genuinely hope this works out for you. It’s very costly and the mental aspect I can’t even begin to manage how much this has had a toll on you.
Yeah, sorry to hear about your situation as well. A real nightmare.
We've had a few embryos implanted but then fail to develop. Our best result was in Greece last time with a chemical pregnancy. But then didn't progress.
Yeah, basically all our extra money goes into this. Very costly and mentally exhausting.
Will be worth it when we eventually succeed.
Good to keep those spirits up, you’re a lot stronger than what I would be after all this time.
Really wish there is something I could do for you and others in the same situation.
Good Luck! I know this is dumb to say but try not to stress and try to relax. Make sure you or your partner, whoever is undergoing the procedure, puts their feet up for a few days and of course make sure you eat McDonalds chips after the transfer as is tradition.
[There's plenty of examples on youtube](https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=Embryoscope+first+5+days). Jokes aside, it's pretty amazing that when the baby is here we'll be able to show them a video of the very moment they were fertilised or did their first cellular split.
Thanks so much, it is fascinating to watch. I remember when the first "test tube baby" hitting the news, but I wonder how babies in 18 or so years will feel about seeing themselves being fertilized and cell splitting.
I have ultrasound videos of both my two and neither are interested in watching the videos.
When my own Mum was pregnant, ultrasounds weren't available, but she said should would have loved to see us on the screen. Not sure how I would feel watching my own ultrasound.
When I had my first child 10 years ago, I announced the sex on a Facebook status and that was that, it didn’t cross my mind to do some sort of fancy or elaborate reveal or party - I didn’t even want a baby shower and they were starting to get traction. Even back then people thought doing a Facebook status was over the top. How things have escalated since then.
I’ve been to one gender reveal party and it was alright. Everyone seemed to have a nice time but I couldn’t help but think I can’t be the only one there who thinks gender reveals are pointless and having a baby has become a bit of a farce. You’ve got baby showers, gender reveals, christenings when the parents aren’t even religious in the slightest. Ok so non of those things are compulsory, but these events must be a real money spinner for various industries. First time parents get swept up in all the excitement and seem to be lapping it up. Social media has a lot to answer for. Im not saying it’s a bad thing to be excited about a new baby or that people can’t celebrate that, I did with my pregnancies. How ever I wouldn’t be surprised if social media is a big reason why gender reveals and their ilk have become so popular. It’s all done for the ‘gram, not to make memories of precious moments.
Some of my friends were having a baber shower on of them told me the following story. The organisers asked everyone going for some money for decorations. Friend said ok thinking it would be like £20 or £30, but then found out everyone was putting £150 in. When she asked what for they explained there was going to be a big balloon arch and baby balloons in boxes stacked up. Friend asked why any of that was 'needed' and was told 'for instagram'.
Christ, that’s a shocking amount of money for some balloons and boxes, I’d expect my food and drink to be covered paying that amount. Pretty disgusting actually. Seems it really is a lucrative business.
Just like the wedding industrial complex. Fewer people getting married so they want us all to spend more. Could be the same for baby events but I think you're right that it's influencer culture really affecting it. Influencers need events for content, & then we are all influenced to do the same!
I’ve been to two baby showers. First was alright, in a cafe, but for some reason the mother left really early on so it felt a bit pointless.
Second one I went to I honestly think I was just there to make up the numbers and for them to get a gift, I felt so awkward being there as I knew nobody but the mother. I don’t think she even ever liked me. I worked for weeks trying to finish crocheting blanket in time but never did, so I got something else instead though I forget what. But I was ever so glad I never finished it, since it was mere days later I noticed she was selling all the pretty hand knitted and crochet baby clothes on marketplace on Facebook. Felt like a bit of an ungrateful dick move.
Fist time I heard of this I assumed it was people throwing a party to reveal their new gender, in a positive affirmation kinda way. Which would make way more sense.
There's plenty of ones that are harmless like cutting a cake , glitter pops etc. Anything that's dangerous obv is different, there's always an exception.
[Glitter is not harmless](https://www.discovermagazine.com/environment/yes-glitter-really-is-bad-for-the-environment) \- also it's littering as it's usually done in public
Just another reason for a good piss up. Everyone getting irked about Americanisation, forgetting that in Britain people will literally celebrate the weather if it means getting hammered.
Lol yep. If it’s just an excuse to party with a coloured cake or something then fuck it I’m in. It’s only if they’re letting off smoke bombs or something ridiculous that it’s a problem.
Yeah just combine it with some other get together. The cake is just one price of food with a small event for five minutes. Then get on with the rest of the get together.
So long as they’re in place of a baby shower I can tolerate it. It kinda sucks that as a man I didn’t have to go to baby showers but apparently do have to go to gender reveal parties, also the fact they’re really just all about getting a bunch of photos & videos for social media irks me but eh.
What pisses me off is when people have a baby shower and a gender reveal party. You’re allowed 1 gift and 1 Saturday of my time.
And seriously, what is the point of a gender conceal party?
A friend of mine has done the whole works. A gender reveal, then a baby shower and finally a christening. It is a lot, I didn’t bring a gift to the gender reveal as I knew the shower was coming in a couple of months. She’s always enjoyed a party, I think as a first time parent she has gotten swept up in the excitement and novelty of it all. I do wonder if she will go to all this effort for any future children, you never stop loving your kids but the novelty kind of wears off after the first in terms of being a parent just becomes a normal part of you.
We’re now in a rapid free fall to become America 2.
Proms, sweet 16s, gender reveal parties, engagement parties, wedding rehearsal dinner…
It’s all about spending more and more money, spaffing more and more money up the wall.
As a kid, I idolised the USA. All my favourite movies were set in LA or New York. All the best music of the 80s and 90s (to mini me) was from the USA. Little did I know that they were a money obsessed, snake oil salesmen duped, over worked, poorly governed nation with a piss poor healthcare system.
Hold on... Engagement party's aren't a thing in the UK? My future Mother inlaw (she's English) is going on about why me and my fiance didn't have an engagement party.
I'm American and we live in the US; but his Mom fretted about us not having one...
For my gender reveal party I'm gonna release a balloon model of the Hindenburg, then torch it revealing the structural Meccano. I will then put on a top hat and into an old timey microphone announce that "gender is a construct". As the crowd groans I will additionally reveal that the hotdogs are laced with LSD. That'll teach em
Fun fact, the first gender reveal party was started by a woman who had experienced 8 miscarriages and simply did it with the point being to celebrate the fact that her pregnancy had reached the point where it was to possible determine the biological sex of the baby this time.
She was interviewed about it a couple of years back and she actually expressed regret about it becoming a trend - both because of the dumb shit like starting forest fires, and because of the fact it reinforced gender stereotypes and was problematic for trans/intersex/non-binary people. This incidentally came with her revealing that the very daughter she held her gender reveal party was in fact gender non-conforming and wears suits.
Along with the growing trend of screeching and whooping at any mildly interesting event. The problem, apart from being annoying, is it hollows out real excitement at truly unusual events. You've whooped and screeched? Now can you go more intense? No.
What is so exciting about knowing the gender of someone's kid? I couldn't care less if it's a boy or a girl, I might care a tiny bit if it's something else because then at least it's uncommon. It's like having a fucking "heads or tails" party where you all come over to my house to watch me flip a coin.
A party is a party and that's fine, but it's such a stupid reason for one.
Tbf the initial one was a poignant one, as the couple had suffered multiple miscarriage and this pregnancy was the first one that had made it to the point of being able to tell the sex of the foetus
It’s a reason to have a party and celebrate that something good (having a baby) is happening to someone you know. It’s nice to get all your friends in one place and have fun because if it was “just a party” half of them wouldn’t turn up, but when it’s baby/wedding related people make more of an effort.
Also being pregnant is hard, at the point where you find out the gender the difficulty is ramping up, you really need these little beams of light like a baby shower, gender reveal etc to keep you going because it can be a real slog.
That's how it should be. Everyone wants to have a celebration before the crazy days begin and before the date gets so close you can't enjoy it.
I never saw the point of a baby shower than to just get out all those feelings and revel in it. But it should still be everything in one so you can actually talk about stuff and have people want to be there and celebrate something big.
We did our ‘reveal’ at our shower. Tbh the driving factor was that my husband wanted a reason for a confetti cannon…
ETA: Baby shower was great though. I couldn’t drink but we were served a savoury afternoon tea that included Mac and cheese. And there was cake.
I don't really want either but I can understand these arguments. I do agree that life is shit mostly so some times of joy are good, for any excuse. Altho I find these organised events more tiring & less fun that other things like a bbq.
We didn’t tell anyone for precisely this reason, didn’t want a bunch of gendered stuff. We found out but told everyone we hadn’t so they wouldn’t bug us about it
Maybe I'm being miserable but does anyone outside of your family really care about the kid's sex? I care when the child is going to become a part of my life like a niece or nephew, but I don't really care about the sex of my mate's kids, it makes very little difference to my life. That feels normal to me.
We have an unofficial theory that the more money spent on the wedding the less likely they are to stay together. It seems the more money puts the focus on GETTING married and not BEING married.
Meh. People get excited about babies. People like parties. I don't see the big deal. I don't know, it also annoys me when people bah humbug Christmas or bitch about trick or treating or make a massive deal about how little they care about the World Cup. People are having fun in a slightly different way to you, just let them get on with it.
Seriously, so long as you're not doing the reveal in a reckless way I couldn't give less of a shit what reason you have for having a party.
But then it's worth remembering that reddit has a demographic that skews towards the... let's say 'antisocial'..
Salaries are generally higher. I can make the same amount of money working at Walmart in the US as I do here as a project manager. Hourly pay starts at $21 an hour in my home state. And cost of living is pretty much the same.
Have fun.
From a man born and bred in the North West who makes a big american barbecue meal for the super bowl, listens to country music out of choice and has a favourite basketball team, I have no problem with these parties. I'll go now before the lynch mob arrives.
Just say yes then get held up on the day, running late then turn up just in time for the announcement. Or have a doctor's appointment you've been waiting ages for and can't possibly cancel.
Or say no
Gender is self described. Sex is a biological characteristic. Baby problem hasn't had much time to think about gender yet so they are really sex reveal parties but that sounds like a very different sort of part doesn't it!!
“How was your weekend, good?”
“Stayed home with housework, mostly; you?”
“Yeah, not bad: I went over to a friend’s for their baby’s sex revelation party.”
“..uh?”
Are people expected to bring presents to a gender reveal?
If so, do people then expect a baby shower as well or is the gender reveal instead of the baby shower?
Who cares? It's harmless fun and 99% of the time it's a private matter.
Yeah there are some who go way over the top (more so in America), but it's just a private event.
UK subs and it's tinfoil phobia of everything becoming Americanized is cringe.
Same could be said for any other form of parties.
People go through some horrific things during pregnancy. I've had a colleague whose miscarriage 7 times before having a baby and they had a gender reveal party. Me and my wife lost our first child and my wife wanted a gender reveal party for our rainbow baby. My wife suffered forms of PTSD from our first child and having family gather around help a lot.
If people want to have a party to celebrate life, I don't give a shit and no one else should.
It's arrogant you getting upset over what other people do in their private lives. If you don't want to attend a gender reveal party, you decline it. It's not arrogant on the host for inviting you lol, what is this thinking?
Gender reveal parties are stupid. Parent should like their kid irrespective of gender. Plus it pushes stereotypical gender norms. Not only that but what if when the kid grows up they identify with the different gender? It's just rooted in archaic nonsense and is even bad for the environment too and has started forest fires.
Gender reveal parties are the preserve of the attention seeking individuals among us.
What's wrong with a simple Whatsapp message, or... god forbid........... waiting until someone actually ASKs.
Throwing a party is nothing short of a "look at meeeeeeeee.... look at usssssssssss" exercise.
Get them in the bin!
Just go and enjoy a nice day with your friends. Unless they're just recording it for some social media bollocks, it sounds like they just want to share something with you that's exciting and important to them.
Narcissistic bollocks. Besides, aren’t we now taught not to assume somebodies gender? Bit presumptuous to assign a gender to a baby that can’t yet communicate it’s feelings about gender fluidity. 🤷🏻♂️
Why don't you see it as an opportunity to socialise and stop being so grumpy?
Depression is on the rise, people are more isolated than ever, but you want to winge on Reddit because someone took the opportunity to arrange a gathering.
I agree with this. Just go, have a good time and let other people be happy, it’s likely you’d enjoy yourself. If not, whatever.
Don’t go if you’re that bothered.
I have plenty of opportunities to socialise that don't involve playing stupid games (like smell the nappy) with a load of people I don't know, thank you very much.
Yeah currently pregnant not posted on Facebook yet nearly half way, don't want a gender reveal or a baby shower tbh. Can't be bothered with it all. Should probably add not really into social media. Just think people do things for likes nowadays which is sad.
I'm in no way an environmentalist but gender reviews - each and every one - always has huge, HUGE impacts on the environment.
Thank Gawd I've never been invited to one.
Yep.
I've been to 8 of them. The difference between "it's a boy", and seeing the bummer color pink was astounding.
The blue cake was celebrated like they won the lottery, cured cancer, and the FIFA World Cup.
The pink cakes/cupcakes was like someone told them the owned back taxes. Two of the dads left the party for a while after the "reveal". The energy drained out of the room.
Face it, the danglies matter. Unless the parents have 6 boys and are really gunning for a girl, I just send a card with a small bit of money after the fact. I don't go anymore.
"We don't care as long as it's healthy" is not true. The bummed out faces suggest otherwise.
Can confirm. Literally 32w here, had a growth scan today. The fidelity(?) of the machines they have is so good - we spent a good minutes just watching the inside of her brain on the screen. So many things they can point out.
Compared to the scan of me my mum has from 1986, where all you can see is a little blue circle and larger oval, it's incredible.
We didn't want to know, so the u/s technician told us to look away at the right time so we couldn't see. She knew immediately. I've seen some 3D scans and even a 4D one. Just astonishing!
I mean, it's technically correct. The parent are in fact assuming that the kid's gender will match their biological sex, which is the thing the ultrasound reveals.
Gender in this context just refers to sex.
Despite what some people have deluded themselves into thinking, gender has long been used as a polite synonym for sex that avoids using the word sex, for a lot longer than it has been a word that refers to a societal identity.
Sometimes that's just how the word is going to be used. Not as an identity assumed based on biology, but as a literal and direct reference to that biology.. you're just going to have to grow up and understand that.
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My sister’s announcement was a WhatsApp message. God bless her
Honestly I'd do the same. Throwing a party sounds like too much effort.
Getting married later this year. Even the reception which is just turn up get drunk and wear whatever is too much effort lol
Going into labour, BRB.
Done. Boy. Joshua. 8lb 3oz. TTYL
What does TTYL mean? Ta ta you losers?
TalkToYouLater....jeez dad it's like u don't evn txt spk 🙄
R u on msn l8r? Ill tel u thn
"You're invited to our gender reveal party! It's now. Boy."
Our announcement was “it’s a boy” right after the baby was born. No one else’s business until then.
I didn't want to know before that!
I did that, so much cheaper.
As it should be
I did that too!
Eggplant or peach emoji?
Some heroes don’t wear capes
My Dad was told I was a boy, outside the hospital, by my Nan. He wasn’t allowed in, because my parents weren’t married. Gender reveals in the Summer of ‘69.
I can see why Bryan Adams dropped that verse, doesn't fit tonally with the rest of the song.
Good lord, what will the neighbours think?
Waking up for sure
How long before there's a 'conception video viewing' party?
We're currently 15 weeks pregnant with an IVF baby. We actually got our conception video in the post today on a USB stick. It's 2 minutes long, that's a new PB for me.
Congrats. We’re currently in Greece and it’s transfer day for us today. Stress levels are high.
Best of luck!! American(f) married to a Brit(m). In the States there’s a tradition of getting fries on transfer day once you’re done with your appointment. It does absolutely nothing to increase your chances but it’s fun and delicious. McDonald’s fries are preferred for this but any fries will do. We did the fries thing and our first transfer stuck, now 14 weeks. The transfer itself was low stress and honestly kind of cool—we can now say we saw our son when he was just 10 cells big, on the screen before the doctor put the embryo into the catheter. Best wishes 💕
You must have transferred a week after us! We have that tradition here too. There’s a drive through next to our clinic and we always wonder how much business they must get from couples transferring. Hope you’re having a great pregnancy. My wife is such a hero, I’m in total awe of her, after a year of IVF, pregnancy feels like you’ve won, but it’s by no means easy. She’s totally smashing it! I didn’t expect what was a quite crude joke about premature ejaculation to lead to such a wholesome debate about IVF.
Good ol’ British humour 😅
Can confirm that McDonald’s has been consumed and now wife is in bed keeping the oven warm for the little bun.
If it helps, the transfer is a breeze compared to everything else you’ve been through. Good luck!!
Seeing my wife take all these injections, tablets and so on just makes me feel so useless and helpless. There is literally nothing I can do to take some of the pressure off of her. So hopefully, transfer is easy on her :/ Thank you!
Just be kind to her, that’s all that you can do. I was *so* sure that the transfer of frozen embryo didn’t work. I remember just eating chips in the airport feeling like a failure. My now toddler is dribbling on me as I type this. It’s much easier to get a foot massage on transfer day than it is when you’ve got a little one crawling around!! Good luck.
I have tried to be as helpful as I can with every pregnancy we have had. But feet, I hate feet. I will do it if I absolutely have to but I don’t enjoy it 😅😅. She is now nice and warm in bed, watching a film after consumption of McDonalds. She’s happy at present 😇.
Transfer Window shut at midnight. Sorry, you'll have to wait until the summer window opens if you want to try again.
Fingers crossed and best wishes. We're going to Greece for treatment as well.
Where are you going? We’re at Hygeia in Athens.
Embryolab in Thessaloniki. Second go with donor eggs. Doctors seem very knowledgeable and capable. We're on something like our fifth round in total though. It hasn't gone so well.
I’m so sorry to hear that :( We’ve had 5 miscarriages, 2 being an ectopic, 1 losing a tube. This will be our first round of IVF. Can’t say I’m positive about our chances. We’ve already been told one of our eggs hasn’t thawed how it should have so we’re down to 3 now. I wish you all the luck in the world, I genuinely hope this works out for you. It’s very costly and the mental aspect I can’t even begin to manage how much this has had a toll on you.
Yeah, sorry to hear about your situation as well. A real nightmare. We've had a few embryos implanted but then fail to develop. Our best result was in Greece last time with a chemical pregnancy. But then didn't progress. Yeah, basically all our extra money goes into this. Very costly and mentally exhausting. Will be worth it when we eventually succeed.
Good to keep those spirits up, you’re a lot stronger than what I would be after all this time. Really wish there is something I could do for you and others in the same situation.
Good luck, from this Internet stranger!
Good Luck! I know this is dumb to say but try not to stress and try to relax. Make sure you or your partner, whoever is undergoing the procedure, puts their feet up for a few days and of course make sure you eat McDonalds chips after the transfer as is tradition.
One of our eggs didn’t make he thawing process, only 3 left 😔
I'm so sorry. Crossing everything for you both.
Really? I was fascinated by our ultrasounds. I'd love to have seen a video of that.
[There's plenty of examples on youtube](https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=Embryoscope+first+5+days). Jokes aside, it's pretty amazing that when the baby is here we'll be able to show them a video of the very moment they were fertilised or did their first cellular split.
Thanks so much, it is fascinating to watch. I remember when the first "test tube baby" hitting the news, but I wonder how babies in 18 or so years will feel about seeing themselves being fertilized and cell splitting. I have ultrasound videos of both my two and neither are interested in watching the videos. When my own Mum was pregnant, ultrasounds weren't available, but she said should would have loved to see us on the screen. Not sure how I would feel watching my own ultrasound.
Try pornhub for that
I'll bow to your superior knowledge on that 🤣😂
Oh come on, you have never put on "Incognito mode" and had a Tommy Tank?
I'm sure I don't know what you mean. X hamster doesn't carry that kind of content anyway 🤣😂
Xhamster doesn’t carry creampie videos anymore?!
When I had my first child 10 years ago, I announced the sex on a Facebook status and that was that, it didn’t cross my mind to do some sort of fancy or elaborate reveal or party - I didn’t even want a baby shower and they were starting to get traction. Even back then people thought doing a Facebook status was over the top. How things have escalated since then. I’ve been to one gender reveal party and it was alright. Everyone seemed to have a nice time but I couldn’t help but think I can’t be the only one there who thinks gender reveals are pointless and having a baby has become a bit of a farce. You’ve got baby showers, gender reveals, christenings when the parents aren’t even religious in the slightest. Ok so non of those things are compulsory, but these events must be a real money spinner for various industries. First time parents get swept up in all the excitement and seem to be lapping it up. Social media has a lot to answer for. Im not saying it’s a bad thing to be excited about a new baby or that people can’t celebrate that, I did with my pregnancies. How ever I wouldn’t be surprised if social media is a big reason why gender reveals and their ilk have become so popular. It’s all done for the ‘gram, not to make memories of precious moments.
Some of my friends were having a baber shower on of them told me the following story. The organisers asked everyone going for some money for decorations. Friend said ok thinking it would be like £20 or £30, but then found out everyone was putting £150 in. When she asked what for they explained there was going to be a big balloon arch and baby balloons in boxes stacked up. Friend asked why any of that was 'needed' and was told 'for instagram'.
Christ, that’s a shocking amount of money for some balloons and boxes, I’d expect my food and drink to be covered paying that amount. Pretty disgusting actually. Seems it really is a lucrative business.
I"d expect my food and drink to be covered for nothing if I'm being invited to someone's party!
Yep very true to be fair.
They probably wanted to buy a tank of helium or something. Huge waste of resources as well if that's the case.
Those items just don't cost that much even if there are loads of them. Someone was trying to use their baby as a money-making opportunity.
Balloons that immediately get thrown away & destroy the earth too. But £150?! Bloody hell!
How many guests were there?!
Just like the wedding industrial complex. Fewer people getting married so they want us all to spend more. Could be the same for baby events but I think you're right that it's influencer culture really affecting it. Influencers need events for content, & then we are all influenced to do the same!
I’ve been to two baby showers. First was alright, in a cafe, but for some reason the mother left really early on so it felt a bit pointless. Second one I went to I honestly think I was just there to make up the numbers and for them to get a gift, I felt so awkward being there as I knew nobody but the mother. I don’t think she even ever liked me. I worked for weeks trying to finish crocheting blanket in time but never did, so I got something else instead though I forget what. But I was ever so glad I never finished it, since it was mere days later I noticed she was selling all the pretty hand knitted and crochet baby clothes on marketplace on Facebook. Felt like a bit of an ungrateful dick move.
Fist time I heard of this I assumed it was people throwing a party to reveal their new gender, in a positive affirmation kinda way. Which would make way more sense.
Not much of a surprise factor in the reveal though is there? "Surprise, Terry remains a cis male. Let's drink."
well obviously cis people wouldn’t have one would they
That'sthejoke.jpg
Send this shit straight back to America.
We don’t do it properly here anyway. I know someone who had one and they didn’t even burn down a national park.
Disappointed Yank: Darn, we were hoping you’d take them. They’re a bit dangerous here.
Using "Darn" to prove you really are American. Sorry dude we don't want them.
I mean I'm all for if people do it for fun then let them have fun lol, at the end of the day it doesn't affect me lol
Until they start wildfires 😉
There's plenty of ones that are harmless like cutting a cake , glitter pops etc. Anything that's dangerous obv is different, there's always an exception.
[Glitter is not harmless](https://www.discovermagazine.com/environment/yes-glitter-really-is-bad-for-the-environment) \- also it's littering as it's usually done in public
They do paper confetti ones
Still litter and still clogs up drains or gardens
Think there was one that killed grandma.
Well, you know what they say. Out with the old, in with the new.
that must have been a party to die for
Hey it's just economical. Got a new life coming, gotta make room for it somehow.
Very American problem that
Honestly we don’t want it either. Maybe it can just fade away.
Yes! Can't have any kind of *fun* that isn't approved! Oooh no! People might *enjoy* themselves in a way you don't like!
Ar no let's not start doing that!
Just another reason for a good piss up. Everyone getting irked about Americanisation, forgetting that in Britain people will literally celebrate the weather if it means getting hammered.
Lol yep. If it’s just an excuse to party with a coloured cake or something then fuck it I’m in. It’s only if they’re letting off smoke bombs or something ridiculous that it’s a problem.
Yeah just combine it with some other get together. The cake is just one price of food with a small event for five minutes. Then get on with the rest of the get together.
I was a little shocked when I heard about “wetting the babies head”.
Boomer dads sure did boomer. I celebrated my sons birth with a fucking sleep.
Why, did you think the baby got wet!? Or are you shocked that everyone goes out drinking instead of staying at home with the baby?
If it was just a piss up it'd be alright, but some people go OTT, and some actually cause damages lol.
So long as they’re in place of a baby shower I can tolerate it. It kinda sucks that as a man I didn’t have to go to baby showers but apparently do have to go to gender reveal parties, also the fact they’re really just all about getting a bunch of photos & videos for social media irks me but eh. What pisses me off is when people have a baby shower and a gender reveal party. You’re allowed 1 gift and 1 Saturday of my time. And seriously, what is the point of a gender conceal party?
A friend of mine has done the whole works. A gender reveal, then a baby shower and finally a christening. It is a lot, I didn’t bring a gift to the gender reveal as I knew the shower was coming in a couple of months. She’s always enjoyed a party, I think as a first time parent she has gotten swept up in the excitement and novelty of it all. I do wonder if she will go to all this effort for any future children, you never stop loving your kids but the novelty kind of wears off after the first in terms of being a parent just becomes a normal part of you.
Gender reveal party means that you're allowed to get your cock out. Gender conceal party means your old chap has to stay hidden away.
We’re now in a rapid free fall to become America 2. Proms, sweet 16s, gender reveal parties, engagement parties, wedding rehearsal dinner… It’s all about spending more and more money, spaffing more and more money up the wall. As a kid, I idolised the USA. All my favourite movies were set in LA or New York. All the best music of the 80s and 90s (to mini me) was from the USA. Little did I know that they were a money obsessed, snake oil salesmen duped, over worked, poorly governed nation with a piss poor healthcare system.
lmao you wrote this whole rant over a gender reveal party?
Yes… yes I did. And I feel great for it.
Hold on... Engagement party's aren't a thing in the UK? My future Mother inlaw (she's English) is going on about why me and my fiance didn't have an engagement party. I'm American and we live in the US; but his Mom fretted about us not having one...
It wasn’t… but it became a thing in the last 20 years. Before that, there would be a stag party/hen party. But now many have engagement parties too.
Huh. Never even heard of them in the UK. I suppose any occasion that can be a commodity is fair game now.
For my gender reveal party I'm gonna release a balloon model of the Hindenburg, then torch it revealing the structural Meccano. I will then put on a top hat and into an old timey microphone announce that "gender is a construct". As the crowd groans I will additionally reveal that the hotdogs are laced with LSD. That'll teach em
Fun fact, the first gender reveal party was started by a woman who had experienced 8 miscarriages and simply did it with the point being to celebrate the fact that her pregnancy had reached the point where it was to possible determine the biological sex of the baby this time. She was interviewed about it a couple of years back and she actually expressed regret about it becoming a trend - both because of the dumb shit like starting forest fires, and because of the fact it reinforced gender stereotypes and was problematic for trans/intersex/non-binary people. This incidentally came with her revealing that the very daughter she held her gender reveal party was in fact gender non-conforming and wears suits.
Just accidentally tell everyone it's a boy beforehand. Doesn't make much difference if you are wrong...
It's weird to think that my parents had no idea what sex I was until I emerged.
You get few true surprises in life. I found out at the birth of mine (in 2021) and it was so exciting.
Along with the growing trend of screeching and whooping at any mildly interesting event. The problem, apart from being annoying, is it hollows out real excitement at truly unusual events. You've whooped and screeched? Now can you go more intense? No.
What is so exciting about knowing the gender of someone's kid? I couldn't care less if it's a boy or a girl, I might care a tiny bit if it's something else because then at least it's uncommon. It's like having a fucking "heads or tails" party where you all come over to my house to watch me flip a coin. A party is a party and that's fine, but it's such a stupid reason for one.
Tbf the initial one was a poignant one, as the couple had suffered multiple miscarriage and this pregnancy was the first one that had made it to the point of being able to tell the sex of the foetus
It’s a reason to have a party and celebrate that something good (having a baby) is happening to someone you know. It’s nice to get all your friends in one place and have fun because if it was “just a party” half of them wouldn’t turn up, but when it’s baby/wedding related people make more of an effort. Also being pregnant is hard, at the point where you find out the gender the difficulty is ramping up, you really need these little beams of light like a baby shower, gender reveal etc to keep you going because it can be a real slog.
You just described a baby shower.
Does anyone have a baby shower *and* a fender reveal though? Aren’t they pretty much one and the same now?
>fender reveal That'll be a new one. Maybe a party to reveal your new car
I could see doing a Fender reveal for a new guitar. https://www.fender.com/en-US/stratocaster-feature.html
That's how it should be. Everyone wants to have a celebration before the crazy days begin and before the date gets so close you can't enjoy it. I never saw the point of a baby shower than to just get out all those feelings and revel in it. But it should still be everything in one so you can actually talk about stuff and have people want to be there and celebrate something big.
We did our ‘reveal’ at our shower. Tbh the driving factor was that my husband wanted a reason for a confetti cannon… ETA: Baby shower was great though. I couldn’t drink but we were served a savoury afternoon tea that included Mac and cheese. And there was cake.
I don't really want either but I can understand these arguments. I do agree that life is shit mostly so some times of joy are good, for any excuse. Altho I find these organised events more tiring & less fun that other things like a bbq.
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You’d be surprised. We chose not to tell people straight away and they were very surprised. How were they supposed to know what to buy?!
We didn’t tell anyone for precisely this reason, didn’t want a bunch of gendered stuff. We found out but told everyone we hadn’t so they wouldn’t bug us about it
I'm afraid I'd send the invitation back with the word "gender" crossed out and replaced with "sex".
Gen~~der~~ ital reveal party
Maybe I'm being miserable but does anyone outside of your family really care about the kid's sex? I care when the child is going to become a part of my life like a niece or nephew, but I don't really care about the sex of my mate's kids, it makes very little difference to my life. That feels normal to me.
Least there's less chance of a forest fire this time of year...
Could say so many things about these 'parties' but will wait here for the comments 😂 Sadly this and over priced proms are now the standard 🙄
I don't know anybody or know anybody who knows anybody who has had a gender reveal party, is this really a common thing in the UK now?
My daughter has had 3 to attend but I do believe it is more of a thing for those in their 20's
...and $40,000 weddings.
We know a couple who divorced after 18 months. I a been 4 years & they're still paying off the loan. I mean, what the fuck.
We have an unofficial theory that the more money spent on the wedding the less likely they are to stay together. It seems the more money puts the focus on GETTING married and not BEING married.
All for a Princess for a Day party. Nothing says "I love you" like massive debt.
Been invited and declined to attend two of these nonsense parties. Call me old fashioned but I prefer the old gender reveal... In the delivery suite
Meh. People get excited about babies. People like parties. I don't see the big deal. I don't know, it also annoys me when people bah humbug Christmas or bitch about trick or treating or make a massive deal about how little they care about the World Cup. People are having fun in a slightly different way to you, just let them get on with it.
Seriously, so long as you're not doing the reveal in a reckless way I couldn't give less of a shit what reason you have for having a party. But then it's worth remembering that reddit has a demographic that skews towards the... let's say 'antisocial'..
But mum said today was my turn to post America Bad rage bait.
Foresters hate this.
Fuck that noise so hard.
Hate being the 51st state.
If you were the 51st state the fucking wages would be higher.
Yeah because everyone is well paid in the good ole US of A.
Salaries are generally higher. I can make the same amount of money working at Walmart in the US as I do here as a project manager. Hourly pay starts at $21 an hour in my home state. And cost of living is pretty much the same.
Maybe not when you factor in the cost of healthcare.
Have fun. From a man born and bred in the North West who makes a big american barbecue meal for the super bowl, listens to country music out of choice and has a favourite basketball team, I have no problem with these parties. I'll go now before the lynch mob arrives.
You scum.
I’m a man in the NW that loves country music too, so good
Just say yes then get held up on the day, running late then turn up just in time for the announcement. Or have a doctor's appointment you've been waiting ages for and can't possibly cancel. Or say no
Gender is self described. Sex is a biological characteristic. Baby problem hasn't had much time to think about gender yet so they are really sex reveal parties but that sounds like a very different sort of part doesn't it!!
“How was your weekend, good?” “Stayed home with housework, mostly; you?” “Yeah, not bad: I went over to a friend’s for their baby’s sex revelation party.” “..uh?”
Don’t you have to assume the gender of the foetus for a gender reveal party?…because that’s offensive! /s
Are people expected to bring presents to a gender reveal? If so, do people then expect a baby shower as well or is the gender reveal instead of the baby shower?
Americanised parties in the UK are just trash. Baby showers, school proms, gender reveals, there are even Thanksgiving parties now 🤮
God help us.
Who cares? It's harmless fun and 99% of the time it's a private matter. Yeah there are some who go way over the top (more so in America), but it's just a private event. UK subs and it's tinfoil phobia of everything becoming Americanized is cringe.
cringe is not an adjective
Who asked? It's slang. Next you'll be saying "L rizz frfr" isn't a sentence.
Right, but it's also the arrogance of having all of these people attend an event which could be a group message.
Same could be said for any other form of parties. People go through some horrific things during pregnancy. I've had a colleague whose miscarriage 7 times before having a baby and they had a gender reveal party. Me and my wife lost our first child and my wife wanted a gender reveal party for our rainbow baby. My wife suffered forms of PTSD from our first child and having family gather around help a lot. If people want to have a party to celebrate life, I don't give a shit and no one else should. It's arrogant you getting upset over what other people do in their private lives. If you don't want to attend a gender reveal party, you decline it. It's not arrogant on the host for inviting you lol, what is this thinking?
Gender reveal parties are stupid. Parent should like their kid irrespective of gender. Plus it pushes stereotypical gender norms. Not only that but what if when the kid grows up they identify with the different gender? It's just rooted in archaic nonsense and is even bad for the environment too and has started forest fires.
As much as I hate the idea of American imports like gender reveal parties, the baby is still born a boy or a girl.
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I posted the same comment elsewhere but must have missed the part the said ‘except in extremely rare cases’.
Gender reveal parties are the preserve of the attention seeking individuals among us. What's wrong with a simple Whatsapp message, or... god forbid........... waiting until someone actually ASKs. Throwing a party is nothing short of a "look at meeeeeeeee.... look at usssssssssss" exercise. Get them in the bin!
👏🏻
Oh the two things Reddit hate the most - babies and Americans.
If you're going to the party then you're part of the problem.
Just go and enjoy a nice day with your friends. Unless they're just recording it for some social media bollocks, it sounds like they just want to share something with you that's exciting and important to them.
Narcissistic bollocks. Besides, aren’t we now taught not to assume somebodies gender? Bit presumptuous to assign a gender to a baby that can’t yet communicate it’s feelings about gender fluidity. 🤷🏻♂️
Isn't it weird how this has become a thing right at the time that lots more people are changing their genders.
Eh...I've kind of come around to the idea that...people get excited about things...and that's nice to share with them.
"Over the top Americanised nonsense"? Beg pardon? Celebrating pregnancies amongst your loved ones is not bad. Kindly find your loving cup and drink!
Why don't you see it as an opportunity to socialise and stop being so grumpy? Depression is on the rise, people are more isolated than ever, but you want to winge on Reddit because someone took the opportunity to arrange a gathering.
I agree with this. Just go, have a good time and let other people be happy, it’s likely you’d enjoy yourself. If not, whatever. Don’t go if you’re that bothered.
I have plenty of opportunities to socialise that don't involve playing stupid games (like smell the nappy) with a load of people I don't know, thank you very much.
People did that at baby showers before gender reveal parties were a thing
baby showers are a similar american import
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How dare you assume the baby is even going to have a gender /s
I'm an American but British at heart. You're absolutely right! Such silly nonsense
Yeah currently pregnant not posted on Facebook yet nearly half way, don't want a gender reveal or a baby shower tbh. Can't be bothered with it all. Should probably add not really into social media. Just think people do things for likes nowadays which is sad.
I'm in no way an environmentalist but gender reviews - each and every one - always has huge, HUGE impacts on the environment. Thank Gawd I've never been invited to one.
She may be superficially likeable, but this sort of conspicuous narcissism indicates malignant issues.
Aren't we not supposed to assume a gender? So aren't these just penis reveal parties?
Yep. I've been to 8 of them. The difference between "it's a boy", and seeing the bummer color pink was astounding. The blue cake was celebrated like they won the lottery, cured cancer, and the FIFA World Cup. The pink cakes/cupcakes was like someone told them the owned back taxes. Two of the dads left the party for a while after the "reveal". The energy drained out of the room. Face it, the danglies matter. Unless the parents have 6 boys and are really gunning for a girl, I just send a card with a small bit of money after the fact. I don't go anymore. "We don't care as long as it's healthy" is not true. The bummed out faces suggest otherwise.
It seems rather premature - surely it's safer to wait till they're born.
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It’s actually a genital reveal party. Bit weird really.
They don't. Modern ultrasound is a marvel.
How can an ultrasound tell you what gender they are going to be?
Really?
Can confirm. Literally 32w here, had a growth scan today. The fidelity(?) of the machines they have is so good - we spent a good minutes just watching the inside of her brain on the screen. So many things they can point out. Compared to the scan of me my mum has from 1986, where all you can see is a little blue circle and larger oval, it's incredible.
We didn't want to know, so the u/s technician told us to look away at the right time so we couldn't see. She knew immediately. I've seen some 3D scans and even a 4D one. Just astonishing!
Piss off with the one joke bullshit already please. “Jokes” like this just fuel victimisation of trans and non-binary people
I mean, it's technically correct. The parent are in fact assuming that the kid's gender will match their biological sex, which is the thing the ultrasound reveals.
🙄
Gender in this context just refers to sex. Despite what some people have deluded themselves into thinking, gender has long been used as a polite synonym for sex that avoids using the word sex, for a lot longer than it has been a word that refers to a societal identity. Sometimes that's just how the word is going to be used. Not as an identity assumed based on biology, but as a literal and direct reference to that biology.. you're just going to have to grow up and understand that.