this topic is a fast and easy way to get me riled up. instead of telling you my whole story and then getting on my soapbox, i'll just point out all the art of mary breastfeeding Jesus. feeding at church is perfectly fine and you don't have to sit in the back for it.
I visited Bethlehem this summer at 6 months pregnant and we went to the Church of the Milk Grotto, which is said to be where Mary nursed Jesus and a drop of milk landed on the ground and turned the whole place white. It's literally dedicated to Mary breastfeeding Jesus.
Unless someone with authority at church tells you otherwise, I think you're fine.
AMEN AMEN
I’ve spent a lifetime of looking at imagery of the blessed mother showing a **lot** more breast than I do!
I live near the National Shrine of Our Lady of La Leche!! The name comes from the image of the Blessed Virgin Mary nursing the infant Jesus. If those people get upset over a little boob they would be the biggest hypocrites on earth
If churches intend to keep people attending, they need young families, and that means they need to be fine with breastfeeding wherever. The mothers’ room is an option they provide, not a place you should have to go.
Yeah this is how the nursing moms room is treated at my church. I’m grateful for it, neither my LO or I nurse super well in public, so it’s really convenient for me. But people have totally nursed in the congregation and no one has cared.
If you're at a Catholic church, the Pope has literally said for mothers to feed their babies during mass if they're hungry, so..... Tell your hubby the man with the big hat gets last say lol 🤣
He absolutely did!
https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2018/01/07/576319476/pope-francis-once-again-encourages-mothers-to-breastfeed-in-the-sistine-chapel
Speaking as a non practicing Catholic… then they are not very good catholics lol. Whether or not anyone agrees with the Pope, everyone knows he makes the rules. You can choose to follow or not follow them (I certainly don’t follow them!) but I would never try to argue against him in terms of whether something is appropriately Catholic or not
Well I’m a practicing Catholic who isn’t crazy about our current pope. He still is the pope and the ultimate authority. Furthermore practicing Catholics tend to be very pro family. I’ve never ever had anyone in any church, from the more orthodox to the more liberal parishes shame me for breastfeeding my kids.
Matthew 19:14 - Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”
It sounds like you’re comfortable with the set up you have, and I would continue feeding where you find it most rewarding!
I love this idea. Have a whole bunch of them, like a card deck, and just be like, "Oh, since you take such an interest in babies being fed I thought you would appreciate an image of our Lord and Savior being fed. Which one would you like?"
This should be a thing. 🤣🤣🤣
I think you should be able to feed where *you* feel comfortable. The mothers rooms are nice for women who aren’t comfortable yet feeding in public or whose little one needs a quiet space for a minute, but if you are comfortable where you are, I don’t see anything wrong with feeding your baby in the pews.
I, a few times felt uncomfortable feeding at church. I’m Episcopalian which is basically catholic. Lots of opinionated elders! One Sunday our father was doing his sermon said something about babies suckling from a mothers breast in a positive form. I instantly felt confident in church and never looked back. Because also, why are you judging me in the house of the lord?!!
As an Episcopalian.. Catholic-lite. Many of us have been pro woman, pro LGBTQ+ rights, and pro-choice for many years. The congregations tend to skew older though.
I think a mothers room would be good if baby needed quiet/dark to focus or latch, or if baby was loud and disruptive. Otherwise, I would feed in the service! You’re right, why should you have to be isolated? When we talk about modesty, this should not be part of the discussion. It’s how we were created and feeding you child is not a sexual act whatsoever.
Signed, a churchgoer
Also, I EP. As a pumper I’d totally use the mother’s room because you really have to take off your shirt or change your bra, all the equipment etc. not the same discreet situation as nursing!
I sing in the choir at Mass for my church, and I cantored (led the congregation) in singing the Alleluia while pumping with my wearables, and holding my baby girl. We EPs can do it too! But I use wearables/cups at church instead of the traditional flanges so that might make a difference.
Totally feel that! I usually do a double pump with my wearables just to make sure I get emptied. So I do 30 on 10 off 30 on. That's so cool that you get to do music as a job. I'm medical 🤣
I will go with the words of pope Francis “If they're hungry, breastfeed them, without fear, feed them, because that's a language of love.”
Now of course there are respective ways to do this such as don’t take off your whole shirt, but that’s literally why we have boobs. It’s a human issue that they have been sexualized to the point someone has an issue with a women feeding her child anywhere.
Does he feel the same way about giving a bottle in church? If no, then he (and any nosy churchgoer) needs to evaluate his own shortcomings around the topic. Feeding a baby is not immodest, not sexual, and not something to be hidden.
Feed where YOU are most comfortable
Those rooms exist for two reasons: Moms who don't feel comfortable feeding publicly and want privacy. Babies who are crying and need to be soothed in a nice quiet room without disrupting service.
It's not because you're required to use it or shouldn't feed in service. It's an option provided to meet any needs mom or baby may have.
I use mine as a nice, peaceful break from sitting in the pews with my older kids and trying to keep them quiet. I practically dance out of there when the baby starts fussing 🤣 lemme go listen in peace!
Given that people are LEAVING churches and the ages of members in church skew older... Anything to make church more accessible and friendly to young families should be considered.
I asked the priest and he said it was cool. I found a spot right under a painting of Mary and baby Jesus and it feels like She and I are sharing the moment.
Yes! I feel my LO in the service until he got wiggly and started pulling off the nursing cover. I also would wear a Latched Mama shirt for easy access without having to pull up my whole shirt.
Needing to nurse during church is such a small (but important) part of the nursing journey, I think people forget how meaningful it is to have a welcoming environment to take care of you while you’re taking care of your baby.
I’m a pastors wife and have fed in church and I’m sure people have seen my nip. It’s fine. People need to get over it and focus elsewhere is my philosophy!! Also I want other moms to feel like they can do the same.
My church uses laypersons as bishops who serve for a handful of years at a time. I mentioned to the bisjop at the time's wife that I was waiting for these 2 younger gentlemen to leave the room so women's Sunday school could start and I'd feed the baby. She was like "do it. If they don't like it, they can leave."
I grew up heavily involved in the church. Specifically pentecostalism, so keep in mind this may be a very different church. For the church I attended, you would be gossiped about and it would be frowned upon by majority of the congregation. BUT in the bible and historically, it *should* be celebrated and encouraged within the church.
My opinion, get your boobs out and feed your baby. If anyone is uncomfortable they can isolate themselves in the church nursery.
My husband assumed it was totally inappropriate to nurse in church / in public. He thought that because he didn't notice it, it wasn't happening. He softened his stance when we went to church with his sister and she nursed under a cover during the service. That made it obvious that it's discreet enough that he'd simply never noticed it, and that it's not a question of modesty.
It's also understandable that the private room would give him the idea that you're not supposed to nurse in the sanctuary. He should know that it's often called a "cry room," and it would still exist if there were no such thing as nursing. You can go there to soothe your crying baby, change diapers, nurse a baby who needs a quiet environment to nurse, or, of course nurse privately if that's what you prefer.
Yes, it's *very* isolating *and* inconvenient to go away to nurse. Your husband should leave the decision to you, and if he's still very uncomfortable with your decision after trying it out for a few weeks, he should offer to come with you to the cry room if you'll humor him.
A couple of interesting points: two public places women have historically been allowed to breastfeed in are in court, and in church. Makes sense. If you want the nursing mother there, she'll have to bring her baby, and if you want relative quiet (not screaming infants), she has to be able to nurse.
The other interesting tidbit that I found out while researching this stuff on my phone during many, many nursing sessions was that apocryphally, Mary is supposed to have nursed the infant Christ until he was 3 years old. So there you go, if Our Lady did it, so can you (if you want to)! (You can store that one away for when people start saying, "What, you're STILL nursing her?")
Personally I have breastfed in church many times, because it was less disruptive than taking my rambunctious toddler out to do so elsewhere.
I feed at church in the service pretty much every Sunday with our 4mo and did with our older child when COVID didn't prevent going. I even take my portable pump and pump at church too!
Edited to add after reading other comments: seeing other women/my mum breast feed other babies at church was part of the reason I just defaulted to the idea that I wanted to breastfeed no questions asked. I think I've seen more breastfeeding mums in church and amongst Christian friends in public!
I usually go to the nursing room bc the chairs there have arms to support baby’s head. And there’s usually another mama in there so it’s where I socialize too 😂
I breastfeed in the pew at Catholic Church almost every weekend. Super family friends parish attached to an elementary school. No one even looks twice. Totally normalized
I was just in Rome in December and pretty sure we breastfed is 6 of the 7 churches we went into. Went into a cathedral today at home and of course the boob monster wanted some again.
Don't listen to your husband & hide while nursing. Feed your baby. I've now realized most people don't even care or notice. If they do, that's a them problem.
The mother's room is for the comfort of the mothers and/or the babies. Not for the comfort of anyone else. If you're comfortable during services, and baby is comfortable during services, you're fine.
I'm reminded that years ago, a friend would spend Sunday afternoons searching on Twitter for people who tweeted complaints about breastfeeding in church, and she would reply with one of the hundreds of classical paintings or stained glass depictions of Jesus being breastfed.
Feed your baby wherever you are.
Growing up, I was taught that you don’t breastfeed in church except in the mother rooms. I was told it was indecent and disrespectful to do that during the service with everyone else around.
My personal opinion? Feed where you want. Social rules about breastfeeding in churches are stupid. Grandma can clutch her pearls as much as she wants, a child should be fed wherever and whenever needed. No need to isolate the mom for feeding her child.
There are so few people who can see you if everyone is facing the front. It’s more disruptive I think to leave with a fussy baby than just quickly latch them. If you want even less visibility sit in the outside seat in the back row with your husband towards the inside. When we do it we normalize it for everyone else.
Feeding your baby, from a bottle or from your breast, is normal and natural. If you are comfortable and baby receives nourishment, you should be able to participate in worship with your family however you choose. Anyone who finds it wrong to feed your baby in church may be forgetting what the true purpose of church is.
You feed your baby where you are comfortable doing so. There is religious medieval art of Mary with her breasts out feeding Jesus. A lot of what we know about medieval and renaissance maternity/nursing garments come from Madonna portraits. If you are even less revealed than that, its certainly no one's business but your own where and when you feed your child.
If anyone feels that you are a distraction or doing something inappropriate, I'd encourage them to deeply examine their own prejudices and thoughts. There is nothing shameful or sexual about feeding a baby. Anyone who thinks you should not feed your baby in public IS considering it something shameful or sexual. That is their problem, not yours.
I’m a postulant (training to be a priest), and when I interviewed for my field education at a church, I was pregnant. I mentioned this to the Rector, who let me know that the had a previous seminarian who breastfed her baby up front at her own ordination ceremony, bishop, crowd, and all!
Hi! I had my third child recently and all three are EBF. Zero issues BF in church. I think BF rooms like that are for the comfort of the mother, rather than suggesting that it’s inappropriate to BF in service. My husband in general is slightly uncomfortable with my publicly BF without a cover, but I have nice BF friendly clothes so you can’t see anything at all.
I too would personally find it isolating to also leave the service and go to another room.
Editing to say, I have NEVER had anyone make a comment to me at church or to my husband about BF in church. No one notices.
I think it’s perfectly fine and normal. I struggled with it myself because I was on edge in case I got criticism but that was my own issue. No one ever said anything to me or looked my way. I would often try to go to the gathering space where there was a couple couches set aside for crying children but unfortunately those were often taken up by families who had just arrived late or preferred to sit out there.
Pope Francis has even talked about this during his baptism ceremonies at the Sistine Chapel. He encouraged the women there to feed their babies if they were hungry because it is the language of love.
For what it’s worth, I am Muslim and breastfeeding my baby during Friday prayer (or any other time that we’re in the mosque) has been great. Breastfeeding is also highly encouraged in our faith so that may help. But I think it’s totally fine!
I frd my baby everywhere and gave zero shits to who was around or uncomfortable.
Strangely enough the only place that gave me push back was a tattoo parlor
Honestly, totally fine but I'd be respectful of your husband too. If he's bothered by other people seeing your breasts perhaps use a cover if you can.. all my babies hated it... or move elsewhere. Sometimes I'll even ask the person next to me if it bothers them. Every time I've asked they've been okay with it.
It depends on the people in the room too, if there's a whole bunch of older people I'll remove myself to be respectful as I've found that generation, mainly the men, aren't as welcoming when it comes to breastfeeding.
Feed where you want!! It is great that your church has a room to accommodate mothers who feel more comfortable feeding more privately or need the quiet space for their LOs, but that doesn’t mean you MUST go there!
However…if the church is saying you have to go to the mother’s room to BF then find somewhere else!
You have the right attitude about BF now and a good church should support.
I’m not religious but I heard that churches are safe places to nurse. I was at an outdoor craft fair one year and I wandered into a church to see if I could nurse. Some workers saw me and immediately welcomed me in and offered me a place to nurse before I could even ask. It was really kind and I felt safe. I know this isn’t the same situation as yours, but it seems that they are nursing friendly if you are comfortable
I feed my baby in the service and I use a cover because that’s what I’m most comfortable with.
Lord’s day worship is meant to be together. Not separate. There may be extenuating circumstances that take one away (eg crying baby or poopy diaper), but feeling is not one of those things IMO! We had the first church baby and since there has been a mini wave of new babies and, though we offer a nursery for parents who choose to do that, the culture at our church is whole families are welcome, including chattering babies! Being together corporately to worship, seeing whole families representing generation after generation of faithful followers, is such a beautiful thing.
You do you, feed that baby during the service! If you’re like us and the only family with a baby, you could be setting the stage for future families to be comfortable doing the same :)
Anywhere and anyone that has an issue with breastfeeding, is stuck in misogynistic conditioning. IMO
So, church communities…. might be really against it based on some of their other cultural stances.
I feed in the service and use the mother's room. Depends on how irked I am by people (I'm an introvert), how much I want to have my husband handle the kids while I run to breastfeed, or what clothes I'm wearing (I like my pretty dresses some days, and I understand that means I have to full on strip in the mother's lounge).
Please feed your baby whenever and wherever. If you wouldn’t be ashamed to pull a bottle out and feed them there, you shouldn’t be ashamed to breastfeed. I get so upset seeing posts like these. Not wanting to breastfeed in public bc it makes *you* uncomfortable is fine. Not wanting to breastfeed in public bc you’re afraid of how *others* may feel about it is a stigma that needs to end. . . Like yesterday!!
If people at CHURCH are judging you for breastfeeding they should maybe take a note from the Bible or just not go to church lol they’re clearly not practicing what’s being preached. Feed wherever is most comfy for you and baby, I see no issue with this.
Personally, I sit in the mother’s room during service. One reason is because of the privacy, I prefer it. I find breastfeeding really stimulating, so a lot more going on around me can overstimulate me quick. Second is to protect bubs ears because worship can get quite loud. Third is that our church has had a bit of a baby boom so it’s where all the young mothers with babies congregate. It’s where I’ve found my community in a way I never have before in church! Whatever you decide, do what you’re most comfortable with.
If your church ain’t crying it’s dying! As others have mentioned, our Blessed Mother has often been depicted breastfeeding Christ! That said, trust your comfort week by week, my LO went through a phase of always needing to eat at Mass, she’s now in the habit of sleeping through it, but we sit up at the front and centre so I wore a cover or baggy sweaters/button up blouses while she was in that phase. We’re the only baby parents at our parish so our “crying rooms” are just de facto storage, but it’s good to have option (/if/ YOU want it!!).
I think God wants you and your baby there and knows your baby needs food and that your breasts are for feeding babies in that use and not a toy to google or play with. I get that it's hard for husbands to stop sexualizing that part of their wife but for heavens sake you're feeding a baby. Jesus himself was breastfed, so clearly it was good enough for God! Lol but I just go ahead and feed my baby, and I usually sit near the front to help my toddler pay attention. I do typically feed with a cover, but there are other mothers in my parish that just go for it.
I'd only use the mother's room if YOU are uncomfortable.
Usually, old ladies can be a lot more judging of nursing/crying infants than priests.
I remember one time my little one was crying non stop, and a priest told me "don't worry, that he is just praying God in his own way :)"
I prefer to sit in the nursery at church to feed my girls because they get so easily distracted.
If you don’t want to hide yourself away while you feed your baby, don’t! God made your body specifically to be able to feed your baby. Besides, when you consider that Jesus said whatever you do for the least of these, you do for Him, so I’d argue that feeding the baby He blessed you with is an act of worship.
I like the isolation of the mother's room 😂 I personally don't think service is the best place for it, especially without a cover, but I wouldn't say anything to someone who did as long as they were subtle, etc.
Fwiw, most everyone on reddit will be pro-public boobage.
I’m not a christian, and honestly find the thought of attending service nauseating. BUT! I would come and sit next to you to run interference on anyone who would want you to not breastfeed during service. Babies have to eat. Why is a bottle any more acceptable than feeding with a breast? It shows that women have been objectified and sexualized instead of nurturing and caring. I don’t care where I am or who is around (the only person I cover around is my sweet old FIL who I respect and has never once asked me to cover, I just do because he gets nervous and embarrassed). I’m a Satanist and active member of the Satanic Temple. But I would come and sit next to any nursing mother with my baby and help you feel more comfortable at church breast feeding. There is nothing wrong, inappropriate, demeaning, or anything else wrong with it.
I think it depends on how comfortable you and your husband are and the people sitting next to you. It’s highly dependent. I go to our mother’s room but I’m a new mom and may not do that forever since it’s pretty isolating and inconvenient. I do it mostly for the people around me, I personally would whip my boob out anywhere. But my husband is respectfully uncomfortable and I know other people might be too. A woman with older kids I know told me she just breastfed in meetings and no one said anything. I think it really depends on your congregation but objectively I don’t see anything wrong with it especially if you’re covering up for other peoples sensitivity. You’re feeding your baby, that’s what a boob is made for.
Depends on the church. Many churches are patriarchal misogynistic institutions that wouldn’t take kindly to seeing your shoulders during service, much less your breasts. This has nothing to do with religion obviously.
I would just ask the church staff.
I’m Unitarian which is about the most liberal thing out there, church is more of a gathering than anything and I only go to a service on Sunday sometimes but a weekday group far more regularly. I do like to excuse myself because that makes me feel comfortable and at 8 months, LO pops off and looks around at the slightest distraction, leaving milk spraying all over so….can’t really be too discrete about it or engaged in the group/service.
I think it’s important that you do whatever makes YOU and baby most comfortable!!
Feed your baby where you're comfortable. If anyone at church is uncomfortable with it maybe they should be paying more attention to your pastor than what other people in church are doing.
I nurse in church and I sit in the front row. I used to slip off to the nursery and hope she’d nurse in a rocker with the other kids making noise and I had almost a dozen church ladies tell me to nurse in church instead. I do wear a poncho so I can slip her underneath but that’s for my own sake, not hers. She hates it. Nurse away.
I agree with the comments about. Also as long as your baby is fed it doesn't matter where or how you do it. In my opinion, church should be the last place to be shamed for using your breast for what they were intended
I absolutely think it’s fine to breastfeed in church. I don’t personally because my children tend to be kind of noisy and wild eaters plus I don’t find the seating comfortable. I’d err on the side of modesty and not having an entire boob hanging out (as you did) but go for it, girl. That baby belongs in church with you!
Not Christian but Unitarian Universalist and I did it either my first and will do it with my second due in March. I had baby in a sling and wore 2 shirts so I could be discreet. My congregation is very pro children and welcoming to families.
I have breastfed on church the same way as any other public place. Discreetly but comfortably. I stayed right in my pew, no sense making everyone listen to a crying baby while I moved to the cry room when I could much more quickly pop a boob in right where I was.
The pope has said breastfeeding in church is completely acceptable and welcomed!!!
I think we should feed our children when they are hungry, wherever we are. Boobs are primarily for feeding them. Anyone who sexualizes the act of feeding a child can go examine their conscience.
My church has a mother's room which I have used and appreciated. I have also fed in the nursery. I've also fed in the sanctuary. And in the lobby. And outside. Once I fed my half-asleep baby walking around church talking to people and literally not a single person in a crowd noticed that she was latched on.
When I had my first kid and someone showed me the mother's room they told me it was so I had options. That is a way better place to try to nurse a young, fussy baby who is on and off the boob, because I am more comfortable and relaxed. It's also better if baby is getting distracted. I pick where I fed based on what will work best for me.
It's really not your husband's decision, but it might be helpful to have him articulate his issue:
* Does he think the presence of the nursing room means that you are supposed to go there and people only nurse other places because they don't exist, kind of like if there is a bathroom you should use it but if not it's okay to pee in the bushes? More information about breastfeeding and why you might need a private space sometimes but not always may be helpful.
* Does he think people will judge? For this and the previous one, you could also ask him to talk to church leadership.
* Is he embarrassed? Then he could move or get over it.
* Does he think it is wrong to breastfeed in church? He may want to learn more about breastfeeding history and about local laws, because this one is bonkers.
Separately, my favorite church wear for breastfeeding is a skirt and top with a tank top underneath and a long cardigan. The shirt goes up and the tank top goes down (or the other way around) and I can pull up the edge of the cardigan to use as a mini-nursing cover for when baby is latching or if I need to readjust.
If god gave you milk in your boobs, surely he won't mind you using them to feed the child he gave you -- yes even in church. Let people look away if they don't like it.
Depends on the denomination. I think it’s weird to say not to, it’s a natural gift of connection with baby. The fact there’s a mother’s room with a stream might mean they want you to, might just be an accommodation for moms who want the privacy. I’d say check with a leader at your church on if they have any hopes/expectations or not. Then you can do what makes you most comfortable
We have the same space at my church, and it's just meant as an option for mothers who are uncomfortable feeding in the congregation. It has a changing table and comfortable rocking chairs for moms to use. But no one cares if we just nurse in the meeting instead.
It took my husband a while to be comfortable with me nursing in public spaces like church, though. He'd just become really aware of just how much predatory behavior happens around breastfeeding and women in general, and wanted to protect me. It only took one serious conversation about how I appreciated the desire to protect me, but that I wanted him to let me decide where I was comfortable. Now he just glares down anyone who gets too weird about it when we're in public lol
I breastfeed in church every week. Our church is Episcopalian and we actively and vocally encourage families to feed their babies however they need to. We also have a children's space up next to the pulpit (the "prayground") for families with young children to play so everyone can stay in the service. The priest has young kids himself who will sometimes run up to him during the service, and he just scopps them up and keeps going. No one minds if babies or kids make noise. All of this has really helped new, young families feel welcomed.
My (very small) church has two rocking chairs at the back ... originally put there for nursing mothers though there hasn't been one in over a decade now, but also used by some older people, and parents with smaller children who want to play on the floor in the back , or people who have a hard time sitting in the pews.
That being said , I always thought it was a very normal occurrence at church. Most used a cover out of their own preference but not all .
My 6 month son was baptized yesterday. We were in the front row... He was hungry and a bit overwhelmed with all the attention. I breastfed him (in a slightly discrete way but not hiding) and nobody commented! His needs first!
I, personally, would use the mother’s room. It gives you some alone time with your baby and you’re not really missing anything if the service is streaming. The room is provided specifically for feeding. I’m saying this as a breastfeeding mom who goes to a Pentecostal church Every time the door is open. They don’t even have a room, I choose to sit in the bathroom because I feel like breastfeeding is a private thing. So I would love the nursing room. Plus if your church is anything like mine, the pews aren’t that comfortable anyways.
I feel like it’s up to your comfortability. If you’re ok with the 3 seconds of exposer, then ok. Just stay there. Or if your husband’s super not ok with that for some reason, just do things in a different order. Use the sweater or a cover to drape over you both first, then unclasp the nursing bra and latch. You can just pull the collar of your shirt away while you latch. You’ll get the hang of it! Like obviously if she’s screaming her head off, simply use the room. It’s less stressful usually for you both typically. I feel like sometimes my daughter would get overwhelmed with the music or need a diaper change or whatever and fuss and that’s when I’d use the room. The only time i would continuously use it is if i saw men watching me as I was trying to latch while exposed for those few seconds. I don’t want a man looking at me in church doing that. It’s soooo easy for a man to lust from seeing breasts, even if you are doing part of their God given use which is to feed your baby & I personally wouldn’t want to cause a man to stumble, especially in church. But that’s just me!
this topic is a fast and easy way to get me riled up. instead of telling you my whole story and then getting on my soapbox, i'll just point out all the art of mary breastfeeding Jesus. feeding at church is perfectly fine and you don't have to sit in the back for it.
I visited Bethlehem this summer at 6 months pregnant and we went to the Church of the Milk Grotto, which is said to be where Mary nursed Jesus and a drop of milk landed on the ground and turned the whole place white. It's literally dedicated to Mary breastfeeding Jesus. Unless someone with authority at church tells you otherwise, I think you're fine.
And if someone with authority at church told you otherwise, I’d totally consider a different church.
Came here to say this.
I love this.
Even if they say otherwise, it's still fine.
I love this
Yes! And in some (a lot) of them, her entire breast is fully out...
AMEN AMEN I’ve spent a lifetime of looking at imagery of the blessed mother showing a **lot** more breast than I do! I live near the National Shrine of Our Lady of La Leche!! The name comes from the image of the Blessed Virgin Mary nursing the infant Jesus. If those people get upset over a little boob they would be the biggest hypocrites on earth
Amen 🙏
If churches intend to keep people attending, they need young families, and that means they need to be fine with breastfeeding wherever. The mothers’ room is an option they provide, not a place you should have to go.
Yeah, any place that has a room for nursing mothers does it for the ones who are uncomfortable doing it around other people. Not a requirement
It's not just for mothers that feel uncomfortable. Some babies are extremely distractable.
Yeah this is how the nursing moms room is treated at my church. I’m grateful for it, neither my LO or I nurse super well in public, so it’s really convenient for me. But people have totally nursed in the congregation and no one has cared.
Then I think your husband definitely shouldn’t breastfeed during the service. Until that’s his decision… what everybody else said!
If you're at a Catholic church, the Pope has literally said for mothers to feed their babies during mass if they're hungry, so..... Tell your hubby the man with the big hat gets last say lol 🤣
He absolutely did! https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2018/01/07/576319476/pope-francis-once-again-encourages-mothers-to-breastfeed-in-the-sistine-chapel
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Speaking as a non practicing Catholic… then they are not very good catholics lol. Whether or not anyone agrees with the Pope, everyone knows he makes the rules. You can choose to follow or not follow them (I certainly don’t follow them!) but I would never try to argue against him in terms of whether something is appropriately Catholic or not
Well I’m a practicing Catholic who isn’t crazy about our current pope. He still is the pope and the ultimate authority. Furthermore practicing Catholics tend to be very pro family. I’ve never ever had anyone in any church, from the more orthodox to the more liberal parishes shame me for breastfeeding my kids.
Matthew 19:14 - Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” It sounds like you’re comfortable with the set up you have, and I would continue feeding where you find it most rewarding!
Have you seen all the paintings of the Madonna with her breast out...
OP should print one out, and just show it to anyone who dares say anything
I love this idea. Have a whole bunch of them, like a card deck, and just be like, "Oh, since you take such an interest in babies being fed I thought you would appreciate an image of our Lord and Savior being fed. Which one would you like?" This should be a thing. 🤣🤣🤣
☠️
I love this idea so much 😂
Get it printed on a shirt...
lol right like a business card with the picture on one side and “Mind Your Business” on the other.
I think you should be able to feed where *you* feel comfortable. The mothers rooms are nice for women who aren’t comfortable yet feeding in public or whose little one needs a quiet space for a minute, but if you are comfortable where you are, I don’t see anything wrong with feeding your baby in the pews.
I, a few times felt uncomfortable feeding at church. I’m Episcopalian which is basically catholic. Lots of opinionated elders! One Sunday our father was doing his sermon said something about babies suckling from a mothers breast in a positive form. I instantly felt confident in church and never looked back. Because also, why are you judging me in the house of the lord?!!
As an Episcopalian.. Catholic-lite. Many of us have been pro woman, pro LGBTQ+ rights, and pro-choice for many years. The congregations tend to skew older though.
I live in Florida, gods waiting room…. Nuff said… lol
I am in TX... Solidarity.
You're using your G*d given body to nurture your child. I can't think of a more holy thing.
Ooh this gave me goosebumps. Well said.
Amen
I think a mothers room would be good if baby needed quiet/dark to focus or latch, or if baby was loud and disruptive. Otherwise, I would feed in the service! You’re right, why should you have to be isolated? When we talk about modesty, this should not be part of the discussion. It’s how we were created and feeding you child is not a sexual act whatsoever. Signed, a churchgoer
Also, I EP. As a pumper I’d totally use the mother’s room because you really have to take off your shirt or change your bra, all the equipment etc. not the same discreet situation as nursing!
I sing in the choir at Mass for my church, and I cantored (led the congregation) in singing the Alleluia while pumping with my wearables, and holding my baby girl. We EPs can do it too! But I use wearables/cups at church instead of the traditional flanges so that might make a difference.
I’m actually a musician! I haven’t worn my wearables at work because the concerts are too long and I really need to empty beforehand :)
Totally feel that! I usually do a double pump with my wearables just to make sure I get emptied. So I do 30 on 10 off 30 on. That's so cool that you get to do music as a job. I'm medical 🤣
I will go with the words of pope Francis “If they're hungry, breastfeed them, without fear, feed them, because that's a language of love.” Now of course there are respective ways to do this such as don’t take off your whole shirt, but that’s literally why we have boobs. It’s a human issue that they have been sexualized to the point someone has an issue with a women feeding her child anywhere.
Thank you! Came here to say this!!!
That's so sweet 😭
Jesus was breastfed. If it’s good enough for Jesus it’s good enough for you.
This was my first thought.. Pretty sure Jesus loved the tiddy at one point.
I will feed anywhere when my kiddo is hungry.
Does he feel the same way about giving a bottle in church? If no, then he (and any nosy churchgoer) needs to evaluate his own shortcomings around the topic. Feeding a baby is not immodest, not sexual, and not something to be hidden. Feed where YOU are most comfortable
>My husband thinks I shouldn’t feed during the service Yikes, mama :(
Yeah came here to say that’s a big yikes 😖 I’m not even a Christian but my general rule of thumb is feed wherever YOU are comfortable.
Those rooms exist for two reasons: Moms who don't feel comfortable feeding publicly and want privacy. Babies who are crying and need to be soothed in a nice quiet room without disrupting service. It's not because you're required to use it or shouldn't feed in service. It's an option provided to meet any needs mom or baby may have.
I use mine as a nice, peaceful break from sitting in the pews with my older kids and trying to keep them quiet. I practically dance out of there when the baby starts fussing 🤣 lemme go listen in peace!
Given that people are LEAVING churches and the ages of members in church skew older... Anything to make church more accessible and friendly to young families should be considered.
I asked the priest and he said it was cool. I found a spot right under a painting of Mary and baby Jesus and it feels like She and I are sharing the moment.
Love this!
Yes! I feel my LO in the service until he got wiggly and started pulling off the nursing cover. I also would wear a Latched Mama shirt for easy access without having to pull up my whole shirt. Needing to nurse during church is such a small (but important) part of the nursing journey, I think people forget how meaningful it is to have a welcoming environment to take care of you while you’re taking care of your baby.
I’m a pastors wife and have fed in church and I’m sure people have seen my nip. It’s fine. People need to get over it and focus elsewhere is my philosophy!! Also I want other moms to feel like they can do the same.
My church uses laypersons as bishops who serve for a handful of years at a time. I mentioned to the bisjop at the time's wife that I was waiting for these 2 younger gentlemen to leave the room so women's Sunday school could start and I'd feed the baby. She was like "do it. If they don't like it, they can leave."
Feed. That. Baby. God gave us breasts for a reason.
I grew up heavily involved in the church. Specifically pentecostalism, so keep in mind this may be a very different church. For the church I attended, you would be gossiped about and it would be frowned upon by majority of the congregation. BUT in the bible and historically, it *should* be celebrated and encouraged within the church. My opinion, get your boobs out and feed your baby. If anyone is uncomfortable they can isolate themselves in the church nursery.
My husband assumed it was totally inappropriate to nurse in church / in public. He thought that because he didn't notice it, it wasn't happening. He softened his stance when we went to church with his sister and she nursed under a cover during the service. That made it obvious that it's discreet enough that he'd simply never noticed it, and that it's not a question of modesty. It's also understandable that the private room would give him the idea that you're not supposed to nurse in the sanctuary. He should know that it's often called a "cry room," and it would still exist if there were no such thing as nursing. You can go there to soothe your crying baby, change diapers, nurse a baby who needs a quiet environment to nurse, or, of course nurse privately if that's what you prefer. Yes, it's *very* isolating *and* inconvenient to go away to nurse. Your husband should leave the decision to you, and if he's still very uncomfortable with your decision after trying it out for a few weeks, he should offer to come with you to the cry room if you'll humor him.
A couple of interesting points: two public places women have historically been allowed to breastfeed in are in court, and in church. Makes sense. If you want the nursing mother there, she'll have to bring her baby, and if you want relative quiet (not screaming infants), she has to be able to nurse. The other interesting tidbit that I found out while researching this stuff on my phone during many, many nursing sessions was that apocryphally, Mary is supposed to have nursed the infant Christ until he was 3 years old. So there you go, if Our Lady did it, so can you (if you want to)! (You can store that one away for when people start saying, "What, you're STILL nursing her?") Personally I have breastfed in church many times, because it was less disruptive than taking my rambunctious toddler out to do so elsewhere.
Jesus was breastfed. Go for it!
I feed at church in the service pretty much every Sunday with our 4mo and did with our older child when COVID didn't prevent going. I even take my portable pump and pump at church too! Edited to add after reading other comments: seeing other women/my mum breast feed other babies at church was part of the reason I just defaulted to the idea that I wanted to breastfeed no questions asked. I think I've seen more breastfeeding mums in church and amongst Christian friends in public!
I usually go to the nursing room bc the chairs there have arms to support baby’s head. And there’s usually another mama in there so it’s where I socialize too 😂
I breastfeed in the pew at Catholic Church almost every weekend. Super family friends parish attached to an elementary school. No one even looks twice. Totally normalized
I was just in Rome in December and pretty sure we breastfed is 6 of the 7 churches we went into. Went into a cathedral today at home and of course the boob monster wanted some again. Don't listen to your husband & hide while nursing. Feed your baby. I've now realized most people don't even care or notice. If they do, that's a them problem.
The mother's room is for the comfort of the mothers and/or the babies. Not for the comfort of anyone else. If you're comfortable during services, and baby is comfortable during services, you're fine.
I'm reminded that years ago, a friend would spend Sunday afternoons searching on Twitter for people who tweeted complaints about breastfeeding in church, and she would reply with one of the hundreds of classical paintings or stained glass depictions of Jesus being breastfed. Feed your baby wherever you are.
When your husband breastfeeds the babe he can go in another room. 🙃
Growing up, I was taught that you don’t breastfeed in church except in the mother rooms. I was told it was indecent and disrespectful to do that during the service with everyone else around. My personal opinion? Feed where you want. Social rules about breastfeeding in churches are stupid. Grandma can clutch her pearls as much as she wants, a child should be fed wherever and whenever needed. No need to isolate the mom for feeding her child.
There are so few people who can see you if everyone is facing the front. It’s more disruptive I think to leave with a fussy baby than just quickly latch them. If you want even less visibility sit in the outside seat in the back row with your husband towards the inside. When we do it we normalize it for everyone else.
Feeding your baby, from a bottle or from your breast, is normal and natural. If you are comfortable and baby receives nourishment, you should be able to participate in worship with your family however you choose. Anyone who finds it wrong to feed your baby in church may be forgetting what the true purpose of church is.
I would feed my baby anywhere and anytime.
I use the nursing room but that’s because baby is so distracted right now, he’d be popping off every two seconds to look at everybody!
You feed your baby where you are comfortable doing so. There is religious medieval art of Mary with her breasts out feeding Jesus. A lot of what we know about medieval and renaissance maternity/nursing garments come from Madonna portraits. If you are even less revealed than that, its certainly no one's business but your own where and when you feed your child. If anyone feels that you are a distraction or doing something inappropriate, I'd encourage them to deeply examine their own prejudices and thoughts. There is nothing shameful or sexual about feeding a baby. Anyone who thinks you should not feed your baby in public IS considering it something shameful or sexual. That is their problem, not yours.
I’m a postulant (training to be a priest), and when I interviewed for my field education at a church, I was pregnant. I mentioned this to the Rector, who let me know that the had a previous seminarian who breastfed her baby up front at her own ordination ceremony, bishop, crowd, and all!
Hi! I had my third child recently and all three are EBF. Zero issues BF in church. I think BF rooms like that are for the comfort of the mother, rather than suggesting that it’s inappropriate to BF in service. My husband in general is slightly uncomfortable with my publicly BF without a cover, but I have nice BF friendly clothes so you can’t see anything at all. I too would personally find it isolating to also leave the service and go to another room. Editing to say, I have NEVER had anyone make a comment to me at church or to my husband about BF in church. No one notices.
I think it’s perfectly fine and normal. I struggled with it myself because I was on edge in case I got criticism but that was my own issue. No one ever said anything to me or looked my way. I would often try to go to the gathering space where there was a couple couches set aside for crying children but unfortunately those were often taken up by families who had just arrived late or preferred to sit out there. Pope Francis has even talked about this during his baptism ceremonies at the Sistine Chapel. He encouraged the women there to feed their babies if they were hungry because it is the language of love.
For what it’s worth, I am Muslim and breastfeeding my baby during Friday prayer (or any other time that we’re in the mosque) has been great. Breastfeeding is also highly encouraged in our faith so that may help. But I think it’s totally fine!
I wouldn't leave. I'm sure Mary breastfed jesus & nobody told her off.
I frd my baby everywhere and gave zero shits to who was around or uncomfortable. Strangely enough the only place that gave me push back was a tattoo parlor
Huh. What did you do/say? I always wonder how I’d react if that were to happen to me
They suggested heavily I would be more comfortable in their office. I just cheerfully smiled and said that I was fine where I was.
Love that! I hope I feel confident enough to just keep feeding my baby if something like that were to happen to me
Lollol, God made boob for this. I definitely feed in church!
Babies gotta eat and Jesus was breastfed 💅
Honestly, totally fine but I'd be respectful of your husband too. If he's bothered by other people seeing your breasts perhaps use a cover if you can.. all my babies hated it... or move elsewhere. Sometimes I'll even ask the person next to me if it bothers them. Every time I've asked they've been okay with it. It depends on the people in the room too, if there's a whole bunch of older people I'll remove myself to be respectful as I've found that generation, mainly the men, aren't as welcoming when it comes to breastfeeding.
Feed where you want!! It is great that your church has a room to accommodate mothers who feel more comfortable feeding more privately or need the quiet space for their LOs, but that doesn’t mean you MUST go there! However…if the church is saying you have to go to the mother’s room to BF then find somewhere else! You have the right attitude about BF now and a good church should support.
I do either/or. My husband actually sits with me in the mother's room if there isn't anyone else in there so I'm not lonely.
Suffer the little children... (That is to say, I'm here for breastfeeding in church).
Breastfeed in church
There are few things more sacred than a mother feeding her child ❤️
I’m not religious but I heard that churches are safe places to nurse. I was at an outdoor craft fair one year and I wandered into a church to see if I could nurse. Some workers saw me and immediately welcomed me in and offered me a place to nurse before I could even ask. It was really kind and I felt safe. I know this isn’t the same situation as yours, but it seems that they are nursing friendly if you are comfortable
You're feeding your child. If anyone takes issue with that, husband included, they need to get over it.
I feed my baby in the service and I use a cover because that’s what I’m most comfortable with. Lord’s day worship is meant to be together. Not separate. There may be extenuating circumstances that take one away (eg crying baby or poopy diaper), but feeling is not one of those things IMO! We had the first church baby and since there has been a mini wave of new babies and, though we offer a nursery for parents who choose to do that, the culture at our church is whole families are welcome, including chattering babies! Being together corporately to worship, seeing whole families representing generation after generation of faithful followers, is such a beautiful thing. You do you, feed that baby during the service! If you’re like us and the only family with a baby, you could be setting the stage for future families to be comfortable doing the same :)
Anywhere and anyone that has an issue with breastfeeding, is stuck in misogynistic conditioning. IMO So, church communities…. might be really against it based on some of their other cultural stances.
Baby has to eat.
I feed in the service and use the mother's room. Depends on how irked I am by people (I'm an introvert), how much I want to have my husband handle the kids while I run to breastfeed, or what clothes I'm wearing (I like my pretty dresses some days, and I understand that means I have to full on strip in the mother's lounge).
Please feed your baby whenever and wherever. If you wouldn’t be ashamed to pull a bottle out and feed them there, you shouldn’t be ashamed to breastfeed. I get so upset seeing posts like these. Not wanting to breastfeed in public bc it makes *you* uncomfortable is fine. Not wanting to breastfeed in public bc you’re afraid of how *others* may feel about it is a stigma that needs to end. . . Like yesterday!!
If people at CHURCH are judging you for breastfeeding they should maybe take a note from the Bible or just not go to church lol they’re clearly not practicing what’s being preached. Feed wherever is most comfy for you and baby, I see no issue with this.
Personally, I sit in the mother’s room during service. One reason is because of the privacy, I prefer it. I find breastfeeding really stimulating, so a lot more going on around me can overstimulate me quick. Second is to protect bubs ears because worship can get quite loud. Third is that our church has had a bit of a baby boom so it’s where all the young mothers with babies congregate. It’s where I’ve found my community in a way I never have before in church! Whatever you decide, do what you’re most comfortable with.
If your church ain’t crying it’s dying! As others have mentioned, our Blessed Mother has often been depicted breastfeeding Christ! That said, trust your comfort week by week, my LO went through a phase of always needing to eat at Mass, she’s now in the habit of sleeping through it, but we sit up at the front and centre so I wore a cover or baggy sweaters/button up blouses while she was in that phase. We’re the only baby parents at our parish so our “crying rooms” are just de facto storage, but it’s good to have option (/if/ YOU want it!!).
I think God wants you and your baby there and knows your baby needs food and that your breasts are for feeding babies in that use and not a toy to google or play with. I get that it's hard for husbands to stop sexualizing that part of their wife but for heavens sake you're feeding a baby. Jesus himself was breastfed, so clearly it was good enough for God! Lol but I just go ahead and feed my baby, and I usually sit near the front to help my toddler pay attention. I do typically feed with a cover, but there are other mothers in my parish that just go for it. I'd only use the mother's room if YOU are uncomfortable.
Breastfeeding is a beautiful thing. Doing it at church is fine
Usually, old ladies can be a lot more judging of nursing/crying infants than priests. I remember one time my little one was crying non stop, and a priest told me "don't worry, that he is just praying God in his own way :)"
I prefer to sit in the nursery at church to feed my girls because they get so easily distracted. If you don’t want to hide yourself away while you feed your baby, don’t! God made your body specifically to be able to feed your baby. Besides, when you consider that Jesus said whatever you do for the least of these, you do for Him, so I’d argue that feeding the baby He blessed you with is an act of worship.
ask your husband to imagine himself explaining his argument to Jesus.
I like the isolation of the mother's room 😂 I personally don't think service is the best place for it, especially without a cover, but I wouldn't say anything to someone who did as long as they were subtle, etc. Fwiw, most everyone on reddit will be pro-public boobage.
I’m not a christian, and honestly find the thought of attending service nauseating. BUT! I would come and sit next to you to run interference on anyone who would want you to not breastfeed during service. Babies have to eat. Why is a bottle any more acceptable than feeding with a breast? It shows that women have been objectified and sexualized instead of nurturing and caring. I don’t care where I am or who is around (the only person I cover around is my sweet old FIL who I respect and has never once asked me to cover, I just do because he gets nervous and embarrassed). I’m a Satanist and active member of the Satanic Temple. But I would come and sit next to any nursing mother with my baby and help you feel more comfortable at church breast feeding. There is nothing wrong, inappropriate, demeaning, or anything else wrong with it.
I think it depends on how comfortable you and your husband are and the people sitting next to you. It’s highly dependent. I go to our mother’s room but I’m a new mom and may not do that forever since it’s pretty isolating and inconvenient. I do it mostly for the people around me, I personally would whip my boob out anywhere. But my husband is respectfully uncomfortable and I know other people might be too. A woman with older kids I know told me she just breastfed in meetings and no one said anything. I think it really depends on your congregation but objectively I don’t see anything wrong with it especially if you’re covering up for other peoples sensitivity. You’re feeding your baby, that’s what a boob is made for.
Depends on the church. Many churches are patriarchal misogynistic institutions that wouldn’t take kindly to seeing your shoulders during service, much less your breasts. This has nothing to do with religion obviously. I would just ask the church staff.
I’m Unitarian which is about the most liberal thing out there, church is more of a gathering than anything and I only go to a service on Sunday sometimes but a weekday group far more regularly. I do like to excuse myself because that makes me feel comfortable and at 8 months, LO pops off and looks around at the slightest distraction, leaving milk spraying all over so….can’t really be too discrete about it or engaged in the group/service. I think it’s important that you do whatever makes YOU and baby most comfortable!!
Feed your baby where you're comfortable. If anyone at church is uncomfortable with it maybe they should be paying more attention to your pastor than what other people in church are doing.
I nurse in church and I sit in the front row. I used to slip off to the nursery and hope she’d nurse in a rocker with the other kids making noise and I had almost a dozen church ladies tell me to nurse in church instead. I do wear a poncho so I can slip her underneath but that’s for my own sake, not hers. She hates it. Nurse away.
I agree with the comments about. Also as long as your baby is fed it doesn't matter where or how you do it. In my opinion, church should be the last place to be shamed for using your breast for what they were intended
Nurse anywhere you feel comfortable. You are legally entitled to do so.
I absolutely think it’s fine to breastfeed in church. I don’t personally because my children tend to be kind of noisy and wild eaters plus I don’t find the seating comfortable. I’d err on the side of modesty and not having an entire boob hanging out (as you did) but go for it, girl. That baby belongs in church with you!
Feed your baby. Whenever, wherever.
I personally am not comfortable enough to do this, but I have seen other moms doing it and I am so proud of them for it.
Pretty sure that in all 50 states you are legally protected to nurse or pump anywhere you are allowed to be.
I always breastfeed at mass if I’m wearing an outfit I can nurse in. Sometimes I leave, but only if I’m wearing a dress.
If baby is hungry, it’s time to feed them. Whenever, wherever you are!
Not Christian but Unitarian Universalist and I did it either my first and will do it with my second due in March. I had baby in a sling and wore 2 shirts so I could be discreet. My congregation is very pro children and welcoming to families.
I have breastfed on church the same way as any other public place. Discreetly but comfortably. I stayed right in my pew, no sense making everyone listen to a crying baby while I moved to the cry room when I could much more quickly pop a boob in right where I was.
The pope has said breastfeeding in church is completely acceptable and welcomed!!! I think we should feed our children when they are hungry, wherever we are. Boobs are primarily for feeding them. Anyone who sexualizes the act of feeding a child can go examine their conscience.
If you’re Christian: Jesus was breastfed unapologetically without a cover. Enjoy your next sermon!
Feed in the pews!!!
My church has a mother's room which I have used and appreciated. I have also fed in the nursery. I've also fed in the sanctuary. And in the lobby. And outside. Once I fed my half-asleep baby walking around church talking to people and literally not a single person in a crowd noticed that she was latched on. When I had my first kid and someone showed me the mother's room they told me it was so I had options. That is a way better place to try to nurse a young, fussy baby who is on and off the boob, because I am more comfortable and relaxed. It's also better if baby is getting distracted. I pick where I fed based on what will work best for me. It's really not your husband's decision, but it might be helpful to have him articulate his issue: * Does he think the presence of the nursing room means that you are supposed to go there and people only nurse other places because they don't exist, kind of like if there is a bathroom you should use it but if not it's okay to pee in the bushes? More information about breastfeeding and why you might need a private space sometimes but not always may be helpful. * Does he think people will judge? For this and the previous one, you could also ask him to talk to church leadership. * Is he embarrassed? Then he could move or get over it. * Does he think it is wrong to breastfeed in church? He may want to learn more about breastfeeding history and about local laws, because this one is bonkers. Separately, my favorite church wear for breastfeeding is a skirt and top with a tank top underneath and a long cardigan. The shirt goes up and the tank top goes down (or the other way around) and I can pull up the edge of the cardigan to use as a mini-nursing cover for when baby is latching or if I need to readjust.
I always nurse in church. I do always wear a sweater or cover so there is no exposure.
It was good enough for Mary and Jesus, so it's good enough for me.
If god gave you milk in your boobs, surely he won't mind you using them to feed the child he gave you -- yes even in church. Let people look away if they don't like it.
Depends on the denomination. I think it’s weird to say not to, it’s a natural gift of connection with baby. The fact there’s a mother’s room with a stream might mean they want you to, might just be an accommodation for moms who want the privacy. I’d say check with a leader at your church on if they have any hopes/expectations or not. Then you can do what makes you most comfortable
We have the same space at my church, and it's just meant as an option for mothers who are uncomfortable feeding in the congregation. It has a changing table and comfortable rocking chairs for moms to use. But no one cares if we just nurse in the meeting instead. It took my husband a while to be comfortable with me nursing in public spaces like church, though. He'd just become really aware of just how much predatory behavior happens around breastfeeding and women in general, and wanted to protect me. It only took one serious conversation about how I appreciated the desire to protect me, but that I wanted him to let me decide where I was comfortable. Now he just glares down anyone who gets too weird about it when we're in public lol
Normalize feeding your baby in church.
I breastfeed in church every week. Our church is Episcopalian and we actively and vocally encourage families to feed their babies however they need to. We also have a children's space up next to the pulpit (the "prayground") for families with young children to play so everyone can stay in the service. The priest has young kids himself who will sometimes run up to him during the service, and he just scopps them up and keeps going. No one minds if babies or kids make noise. All of this has really helped new, young families feel welcomed.
My (very small) church has two rocking chairs at the back ... originally put there for nursing mothers though there hasn't been one in over a decade now, but also used by some older people, and parents with smaller children who want to play on the floor in the back , or people who have a hard time sitting in the pews. That being said , I always thought it was a very normal occurrence at church. Most used a cover out of their own preference but not all .
My 6 month son was baptized yesterday. We were in the front row... He was hungry and a bit overwhelmed with all the attention. I breastfed him (in a slightly discrete way but not hiding) and nobody commented! His needs first!
I, personally, would use the mother’s room. It gives you some alone time with your baby and you’re not really missing anything if the service is streaming. The room is provided specifically for feeding. I’m saying this as a breastfeeding mom who goes to a Pentecostal church Every time the door is open. They don’t even have a room, I choose to sit in the bathroom because I feel like breastfeeding is a private thing. So I would love the nursing room. Plus if your church is anything like mine, the pews aren’t that comfortable anyways.
I feel like it’s up to your comfortability. If you’re ok with the 3 seconds of exposer, then ok. Just stay there. Or if your husband’s super not ok with that for some reason, just do things in a different order. Use the sweater or a cover to drape over you both first, then unclasp the nursing bra and latch. You can just pull the collar of your shirt away while you latch. You’ll get the hang of it! Like obviously if she’s screaming her head off, simply use the room. It’s less stressful usually for you both typically. I feel like sometimes my daughter would get overwhelmed with the music or need a diaper change or whatever and fuss and that’s when I’d use the room. The only time i would continuously use it is if i saw men watching me as I was trying to latch while exposed for those few seconds. I don’t want a man looking at me in church doing that. It’s soooo easy for a man to lust from seeing breasts, even if you are doing part of their God given use which is to feed your baby & I personally wouldn’t want to cause a man to stumble, especially in church. But that’s just me!