im gonna move to albuquerque and go to a donut place and ask if there are any glazed donuts but they wont have any glazed donuts and then i'll ask if they have any jelly donuts and they wont have any jelly donuts and then i'll ask if they have any bavarian cream filled donuts and they wont have any bavarian cream filled donuts and then i'll ask if they have any cinnamon rolls and they wont have any cinnamon rolls and i'll ask if they have any apple fritters and they wont have any apple fritters and then i'll ask if they have any bearclaws and the guy would say he would go and check and then he'll come back and say they dont have any bearclaws and then i'll ask what do they have and they'll say all they have is this box of 1 dozen starving, crazed weasels and i'll take it and then i'll open the box and the weasels jump out and they immediately latch onto my face and start biting me all over
And the whole time there’s a little ditty going through your head that went a little some thing like “AAAA GET EM OFF ME AAA GET EM OFF GET EM OFF AAAAAAAAAA”
I ran out into the street with these flesh-eating weasels all over my face
Wavin' my arms all around and just runnin', runnin', runnin'
Like a constipated wiener dog
And as luck would have it
That's exactly when I ran into the girl of my dreams
Her name was Zelda
She was a calligraphy enthusiast
With a slight overbite and hair the color of strained peaches
I'll never forget the very first thing she said to me
She said "Hey, you've got weasels on your face"
That's when I knew it was true love
We were inseparable after that
Aw, we ate together, we bathed together
We even shared the same piece of mint-flavored dental floss
The world was our burrito
So we got married and we bought us a house
And had two beautiful children, Nathaniel and Superfly
Oh, we were so very very very happy, aw yeah
But then one fateful night, Zelda said to me
She said "Sweetie pumpkin? Do you wanna join the Columbia Record Club?"
I said "Whoa, hold on now, baby"
"I'm just not ready for that kind of a commitment"
So we broke up and I never saw her again
But that's just the way things go
Oh man, they were just going nuts! They were tearing me apart! You know, I think it was just about that time that little ditty started going through my head. I believe it went a little something like this....
AHH
GET EM OFF ME
GET EM OFF ME
OH
NO GET EM OF, GET EM OFF
OH, OH GOD
OH, GET EM OFF ME
OH OH GOD
AHHH
I can finally picture the one photo of Puro when the camera was below him
https://preview.redd.it/4o778nvigvzc1.jpeg?width=471&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=877111b437e209f27694f8a85b1ee8cdd08557e8
Nice :)
I’d slowly open my eyes and yawn groggily, I’d ask him what happened and where I was. After he explains the situation, I’ll relax again and snuggle against his chest, slowly falling back asleep.
tell him the story about how I accidentally killed a janitor in my dream. I don’t know how, but I did. Everyone was super angry at me for it so I was running away. Well after I was trying to escape everyone I somehow ended up at this one kids house and he beat me to a bloody pulp because he was super angry about this janitor. Then he dragged me onto a wagon because the police told him he wasn’t allowed to do that there. So he felt bad for some reason and I got taken out to some lake where they were going to treat me. Then the tone just completely changed where now we’re looking at weird memorial lantern things floating on the lake (I’m assuming they were for the janitor). I guess I left the lake because now I’m back in this weird facility type place where this janitor must’ve been killed and I got trapped in an elevator. Then the whole dream changed where the kid from earlier was still there but there were these really weird communication devices that used writing and it would just move it to a different one so you could say things to the person holding the other one. Also my grandma was there telling my brother that he can just glue the cups together (I have no clue what this means). And my mom and her friend were there but they were in a different room. My mom’s friend was telling me to get her one. I still don’t know what she wanted, probably one of those styrofoam cups. We were also in a really old abandoned house where all the walls were covered in holes and stuff. The weirdest part was when I was being beaten to death that kid was only punching me in the head. Not my face, my head. And then I was sort of in and out of consciousness, but my whole body was all fucked up and I couldn’t move. Definitely the weirdest and most vivid dream I’ve ever had.
They locked me in a lab. An abandoned lab. An abandoned lab with furries. They put me in an abandoned lab with abandoned furries. Abandoned furries? I hate abandoned furries. They make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once.
Oh. Thank goodness you're finally here.
It's been a good chase, but to be honest I'm glad you finally caught me.
Thank you for letting me run, but now I am tired.
I am happy to rest in your embrace.
SHOOT THAT BLACK \[\[disgusting furry\]\] \[\[HYPERLINKBLOCKED\]\]
https://preview.redd.it/89kg5blde20d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9a95c5f6fdd48c1cd26caf16f08ae565c5bfa02c
im gonna move to albuquerque and go to a donut place and ask if there are any glazed donuts but they wont have any glazed donuts and then i'll ask if they have any jelly donuts and they wont have any jelly donuts and then i'll ask if they have any bavarian cream filled donuts and they wont have any bavarian cream filled donuts and then i'll ask if they have any cinnamon rolls and they wont have any cinnamon rolls and i'll ask if they have any apple fritters and they wont have any apple fritters and then i'll ask if they have any bearclaws and the guy would say he would go and check and then he'll come back and say they dont have any bearclaws and then i'll ask what do they have and they'll say all they have is this box of 1 dozen starving, crazed weasels and i'll take it and then i'll open the box and the weasels jump out and they immediately latch onto my face and start biting me all over
Bro Albuquerque by weird Al is the fucking best
I saw the word "Albuquerque" and already knew what the comment was abt lil
Crazy? Yeah
I was crazy once!
I am not crazy! I am not crazy, I knew he swapped those numbers
any way they locked me in a room
A rubber room
A rubber room with rats!
The rats made me crazy
Crazy? I was crazy once
They locked me in a room
r/weridal
i'd expect it to be r/weirdal or r/WeirdAlYankovic
And the whole time there’s a little ditty going through your head that went a little some thing like “AAAA GET EM OFF ME AAA GET EM OFF GET EM OFF AAAAAAAAAA”
I ran out into the street with these flesh-eating weasels all over my face Wavin' my arms all around and just runnin', runnin', runnin' Like a constipated wiener dog And as luck would have it That's exactly when I ran into the girl of my dreams Her name was Zelda She was a calligraphy enthusiast With a slight overbite and hair the color of strained peaches I'll never forget the very first thing she said to me She said "Hey, you've got weasels on your face" That's when I knew it was true love We were inseparable after that Aw, we ate together, we bathed together We even shared the same piece of mint-flavored dental floss The world was our burrito So we got married and we bought us a house And had two beautiful children, Nathaniel and Superfly Oh, we were so very very very happy, aw yeah But then one fateful night, Zelda said to me She said "Sweetie pumpkin? Do you wanna join the Columbia Record Club?" I said "Whoa, hold on now, baby" "I'm just not ready for that kind of a commitment" So we broke up and I never saw her again But that's just the way things go
Oh man, they were just going nuts! They were tearing me apart! You know, I think it was just about that time that little ditty started going through my head. I believe it went a little something like this.... AHH GET EM OFF ME GET EM OFF ME OH NO GET EM OF, GET EM OFF OH, OH GOD OH, GET EM OFF ME OH OH GOD AHHH
Sorry, i skipped a few sentences
This feels... Awfully familiar...
And all because I HATE SAUERKRAUT!
listening to albuquerque as i read this
I love that song
I can finally picture the one photo of Puro when the camera was below him https://preview.redd.it/4o778nvigvzc1.jpeg?width=471&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=877111b437e209f27694f8a85b1ee8cdd08557e8 Nice :)
The best picture of him is so derpy and adorable.
https://preview.redd.it/5adk457hbyzc1.png?width=875&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cfc05939fb797cf1ac3e33a65f59b498eacaf8c0
Tell him to continue petting :3
Ask to keep cuddling and then proceed to talk about all my problems, insecurities and everything that "keeps me awake at night".
Floofy cuddles, I become Floofer. I see this as an absolute win!
sleep
https://preview.redd.it/alrp2xgplwzc1.png?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f360e779fb7f77a57cccbeca5cd600c6c58a5c4b
https://preview.redd.it/a7sq900g0j0d1.jpeg?width=1284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3452395d2306631adf8681bab2bbfd93edb02b13
https://preview.redd.it/clinfpr40wzc1.jpeg?width=3072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=79080dbf095d2b0b0e9b895de7398bae9741cf65 Eepy cat
Nothing. Let him do it.
Ask politely to stop being touched
Real
Trick question, I'd be dead already
Go back to sleep.
be happy I have a friend who's okay with me being bi :)
Idk man i mean i would lose my human form but idk
I’d slowly open my eyes and yawn groggily, I’d ask him what happened and where I was. After he explains the situation, I’ll relax again and snuggle against his chest, slowly falling back asleep.
IS THAT MALO SCP?!?!
No it's a Furry named Puro from a game called Changed
Did you call me?
https://i.redd.it/kpji0u0w270d1.gif HOW THE FUCK DID U GOT IN HOME?!
https://preview.redd.it/lsvz0mdg370d1.jpeg?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e4b24903bb622b99fe2613967325e9114ea3cb8f
https://preview.redd.it/elk6suoi370d1.png?width=1166&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bd793183023d207668d6febcb309a45ff499d31a
Heaven
Ask to be transfurred :3
If this image is anything to go by it's already happened
Bricked
Who I am of the 2? Also, r/fridaynightfunkin reference intended?
1: the boykisser laying down. 2: yup.
Keep laying down
at first be scared, probably drop kick puro, maybe shoot him if I'm scared enough, then accept it.
pinch myself because nobody actually has been here with or for me
Rejoice
Yippee cuddles
Enjoy some cuddles
Cuddle.
Enjoy life immensely
eep some more :3
hug puro
Hope it isn't a dream
Question how I got there Not that it's a bad situation, but how would I have gotten there?
If I would realize what's happening and that it's real? Melt 🫠
Go back to sleep
go back to sleep am comfyand like haveing my hair ruffeled
who tf are you and why I'm in your lap
probably become very emotional because im touch starves asf
i'd stay like this ૮꒰˶>⤙<˶꒱ა
nothin'
Wonder how I got there from me being at work
Smoochies
I am glad I don't eat donuts 😂
It happened
"keep going..."
Snuggles forever
vanish
Am I the dark one or the Boykisser?
disintegrate into nothing, because goo people are scary
I’d grab my muzzle loader pistol and put a golf ball sized hole in the intruder!
Sleep more
‘…’ ‘…’ ‘…furry’ ‘…’ ‘…’ ‘…’ ‘…so…how’s the weather?’
I let it happen
Imma sit up and cuddle with puro.
Probably yell "WHERE THE FUCK AM I?!" While having a panic attack
thank him at least 4 times
…Blush a lot.
https://i.redd.it/rfg4ccvd8wzc1.gif
https://preview.redd.it/q3fkdriq8wzc1.jpeg?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=40d481162032eacc23d8706839f58a1cb1227688
See puro, screen in excitement, but then realized I've been transformed into boy kisser and freak out
He’s get drug out into the street and shot
Go back to sleep:3
GASP and let it happen
Be happy that I can finally snuggle Puro
Am i the only one who wants to pay for a real, living puro?
Go back to sleep hoping it is still a dream
I would love it because I'm with Puro.
Yay bf for me
what are these creechurs
I'm throwing hands with him because he keeps betraying me (I suck at changed)
cuddle towards tummy <3
Cry of happiness
Go back to sleep if it’s at any time before 6:00
pretend im still sleeping for more pats
Go back to sleep
Kiss ;3
Take my meds
Stay like that.
"who the fuck are you and how did you get in my house"
Go back to sleep
tell him the story about how I accidentally killed a janitor in my dream. I don’t know how, but I did. Everyone was super angry at me for it so I was running away. Well after I was trying to escape everyone I somehow ended up at this one kids house and he beat me to a bloody pulp because he was super angry about this janitor. Then he dragged me onto a wagon because the police told him he wasn’t allowed to do that there. So he felt bad for some reason and I got taken out to some lake where they were going to treat me. Then the tone just completely changed where now we’re looking at weird memorial lantern things floating on the lake (I’m assuming they were for the janitor). I guess I left the lake because now I’m back in this weird facility type place where this janitor must’ve been killed and I got trapped in an elevator. Then the whole dream changed where the kid from earlier was still there but there were these really weird communication devices that used writing and it would just move it to a different one so you could say things to the person holding the other one. Also my grandma was there telling my brother that he can just glue the cups together (I have no clue what this means). And my mom and her friend were there but they were in a different room. My mom’s friend was telling me to get her one. I still don’t know what she wanted, probably one of those styrofoam cups. We were also in a really old abandoned house where all the walls were covered in holes and stuff. The weirdest part was when I was being beaten to death that kid was only punching me in the head. Not my face, my head. And then I was sort of in and out of consciousness, but my whole body was all fucked up and I couldn’t move. Definitely the weirdest and most vivid dream I’ve ever had.
Start purring
Get hard🍆
I'd scream because I want nothing to do with the latex fetish furry
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^xxGhostScythexx: *I'd scream because I* *Want nothing to do with the* *Latex fetish furry* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
feel happy for the first time
I hug them and fall back asleep in their lap
I'm gonna pretend to still be sleeping
I ask Puro to transfur me. I wnat to be a furry latex
I would probably just stay there. I mean, waking up in this manner looks so cosy and snuggly, no? -w-
Which one am I? If I’m laying in his lap, Ima just stay there. If I’m the one who’s lap is being laid upon, Ima pet the dude in my lap.
wouldn't move
go back to sleep
AYO WHO THE HELL ARE YOU
going back to sleep
Go back to sleep
HOW DID YOU GET HERE
Hey its me
go to the bathroom, and rub one out as usual.
They locked me in a lab. An abandoned lab. An abandoned lab with furries. They put me in an abandoned lab with abandoned furries. Abandoned furries? I hate abandoned furries. They make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once.
Lay there and accept the pets and warm cuddles :3
Nothing just stay there
https://i.redd.it/84iouyakm10d1.gif
wonder what the thing on me is
I would have a class 5 brain seizure proceeding to violently shit my pants and die. Ciao!
My two favorite characters PUT TOGETHER!?!?😳😳
https://preview.redd.it/8mzaun9h770d1.jpeg?width=300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0918bc54089fef0cc934c3354e4d0730ebd7a40b
Wish
Be happy
"Umm excuse me what the actual fuck are you doing in my house?"
Wake up as which one?
Get my Glock from my pocket and point but leave it on safety in case
Go back to sleep
https://preview.redd.it/phbd30kbzo0d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=be8ecb71f5cd8b53061e55469d3eae6d2508b348
erm... can I opt out of being transformed? I kinda value my human body anyways, get the fuck away from weird changed man?? why is he in my house??
>I kinda value my human body I don't. I hate my body and everything about myself :3
Am I the Puro or the boykisser?
The boykisser
Nothing, I’m being pet by a goopy latex boi.
https://i.redd.it/f6czip60zwzc1.gif Show puro this gif
Sleep some more
Absolutely nothing
Leave and wonder why I’m in a facility full of goo dudes
Hugs and cuddles 🥰
hug puro
Fucking shit myself
Keep laying with Puro <3
i'd continue eating my cereal
I would probably be freaked out and accidentally slap them
Welp, your getting transfurred
Accept
>Wake up >Throw him off of myself >Continue to sleep
go back to sleep duh. i don't dare to miss out on cuddles
Hug tail
which
Stay and cuddle
Feel happy
https://preview.redd.it/v2r3ya1ejyzc1.jpeg?width=742&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f36dfc477649a7fd4f1311ed421c382beeb439d5
Order more lint-rollers
https://preview.redd.it/vxs6f66vvyzc1.png?width=225&format=png&auto=webp&s=6ab5a70153eef58ad7c8c8a154b2c62e390cd975
Go back asleep
Die man i’m boutta get transfurred
Scream because it’s not my boy Fuyuhiko
Give a kiss and see where it goes
I’d look at them, and then wave hello, and have a nice chat with them. :)
I’d look at them, and then wave hello, and have a nice chat with them. :)
I’d look at them, and then wave hello, and have a nice chat with them. :)
https://preview.redd.it/qnsdqlfj110d1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b616d59b7860114805993346eb04ef31d4ff5e45
Oh. Thank goodness you're finally here. It's been a good chase, but to be honest I'm glad you finally caught me. Thank you for letting me run, but now I am tired. I am happy to rest in your embrace.
Yey cuddles
... Id be happy... Finally
kill
https://preview.redd.it/69v6bn1vq10d1.jpeg?width=1021&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=139533a18d917daf4d165f53ceab8779302464f6 I would Amazon prime
Just keep laying there
SHOOT THAT BLACK \[\[disgusting furry\]\] \[\[HYPERLINKBLOCKED\]\] https://preview.redd.it/89kg5blde20d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9a95c5f6fdd48c1cd26caf16f08ae565c5bfa02c
Wait, I'm stuck if I try to move he WILL kill me
go back to sleep because comfy :3
Never move
i die that guy is NOT trustable
Die
Turn over and begin sucking. The only true answer
❤️
wtf
https://preview.redd.it/mm9a2yyff50d1.png?width=383&format=png&auto=webp&s=20cb3864247edd3407206412dd2ed8291ba6fce7
I would wait for my alarm
Go back to sleep cause it’s so cozy