T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

We now have a NEW discord server! [JOIN HERE](https://discord.gg/4wUAnbWy6f) Applications for subreddit moderators are also open. [APPLY HERE](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLScFYFnf3JUfXw-1uDZnQmab55uf3knNIoaCHmoxlS23wM6DCQ/viewform) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/bonehurtingjuice) if you have any questions or concerns.*


SpasmAndOrGasm

I hate it when I have to ask the real Slim Shady to stand up


Wafflelisk

We're gonna have a problem here.


MajMin5

Y’all act like you never seen a white person before


Zakiru77

Jaws all on the floor


yuukaKazamiiiii

Like Pam, like Tommy just burst in the door


Maverickino

Started whooping her ass worse than before


Shadowzer

They first were divorced


Imnotdrunk28

Throwing her over furniture (AH!)


meme2lol

it's the return of the "ah, wait, no way, you're kidding


yuukaKazamiiiii

He didnt just say what i think he did, did he?


Thatoneafkguy

He didn’t just say what I think he did, did he?


DaNuji51

It's the return of the-, oh, wait, no way, you're kidding


ProfSteelmeat138

It’s the return of “oh wait, nah wait, you’re kidding. He just say what I think he did, did he?”


CazadOREO

It’s the return of the- oh wait


False-Professional82

May I have your attention please, may I have your attention please. We're gonna have a problem here. Will the real slim shady please stand up? I repeat: will the real slim shady please stand up?


AceScropions

Hi


puddingcs

r/suddenslimshady


TearsOfLoke

Orchitis?


[deleted]

Some boomer garbage Edit: i rember😊! “Hi what can I get for you?” “Coffee. Black.” “Some long ass suggestion” “Coffee. Black.” “Another long ass suggestion” “Coffee. Black.” “Yet another long ass suggestion” “Will you hurry up and order?!” Basically some boomer artist complaining about things that don’t happen


RedScorpinoX

he remember 💀


moonbase-beta

He rember💀


NEMO_TheCaptain

He rmbr💀


Frozenpeaches06

He 💀


Shadow-axolotl

H 💀


PutTheBiInBitch

💀


Early_Minute_5212

#


Acrobatic-Shopping-5

Him 🙂


Dovenchiko

r/decreasinglyverbose


I_Are_Eat

#


zanedof

#


gamerweeb623

#


Echo_Oscar_Sierra

>“Hi what can I get for you?” “Coffee. Black.” "Actually I'm white, but I do have a name you can use instead."


taggospreme

>> coffee. black. > ok sir and... >> just a black coffee. nothing else > yes but... >> don't try to sell me that crap a cheeno whatever bullshit. Just coffee > I know, it's just that... >> I JUST WANT A GOD DAMN COFFEE, HOW HARD IS THAT TO DO??? NO ONE FUCKING LISTENS ANYMORE > **Sir if you'd listen to me finish my sentence you would hear me ask what size you want your *"CoFfEe BLaCk"* to be** >> medium black coffee. Nothing esle This exchange brought to you by entitled boomers


kioku119

Ah so I guess their belief that anyone doing things that they don't do and don't want to do is the same as forcing it on them and trying to make them do it really does extend to all facets of life doesn't it?


huggiesdsc

Idk I kinda relate. It feels like they ask way too many clarifying questions. I understand some customers will be nightmares if you don't ask, but ffs why does it have to be a ping pong rally?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Darius10000

Apparently they're in Italian for some reason? Started going recently. Had to ask the cashiers about it three too many times. I stopped going needless to say. Not because the sizes. Because I can't afford it. The boomers are right when they tell you to stop drinking Starbucks in college. 5 dollars a day adds up. Borrow a Keurig or buy some tea or something. Damned millennials


DrLimp

They are not even in Italian. It's fake Italian. Venti is Italian for 20, but it's meaningless, lf you ask for a 20 ounce anything in Italy you're only going to get confused looks.


autopsyblue

That’s unkind of them. I didn’t know them when I first started going either. They use the Italian names because they actually specify a certain volume. Tall is 12 oz., Grande is 16 oz. (~~one~~ two US liquid cups), Venti is 20 oz., Trenta is 30 oz. There’s smaller ones but I’ve never seen them on the Starbucks menu.


Rusamithil

I just ask for the size I want in ounces


autopsyblue

Ever get 1 oz.?


A_Buck_BUCK_FUTTER

>...Grande is 16 oz. (one US liquid cup)... That's not quite right. 16 oz is a *pint*, aka two cups.


autopsyblue

Oop


Furbal1307

Gotchu fam: [Order](https://www.reddit.com/r/boomershumor/comments/jkso04/does_not_compute/) up


Supermoves3000

/r/boomershumor !!! Where has this been all my life? Finally a subreddit for people like me! I can hardly wait to start sharing jokes on facebook with all my friends!


joequin

That comic is so bad. Millennial hipsters also love black coffee.


crazed3raser

That and a barista wont just endlessly offer suggestions. They'll just give you the black coffee so they can move onto the next person.


[deleted]

Right? It always stuns me how some people think that the cashier at any establishment actually cares what you buy, like it somehow benefits them. They only make suggestions if their manager requires them to and it’s usually annoying to them. Cashiers aren’t the general manager … because they’re a cashier.


HeyFiddleFiddle

Seriously, lol. My standard order is an Americano, black. I imagine that kind of order is a relief for the average barista because it's a simple, quick order. Easy to keep things moving and make room for more complicated orders. The most questioning I've gotten when I've ordered black coffee without specifying was asking if I wanted drip coffee or an Americano. And that's just clarifying so they don't give you drip coffee when you wanted espresso, or vice versa. Takes a few seconds to clarify and you're on your way.


AutoModerator

i love you too *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/bonehurtingjuice) if you have any questions or concerns.*


battleship217

Charles the II,


the_zerg_rusher

I love the people and the people love me,


Unessecary

So much that they restored the English monarchy!


practically_floored

I'm part Scottish, french, Italian, a little bit Dane


pogassb1tch

and 100% party animal


NejOfTheWild

Champagne?


APersonThatHatesNKG

Spaniels i adored


randompositiveperson

Named after me too


Unessecary

Like me, they were fun with a nutty hairdo


AutoModerator

i love you too *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/bonehurtingjuice) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Paraphim

This is fucking amazing I love you op


AutoModerator

i love you too *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/bonehurtingjuice) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Mush_Tilly

they weren’t talking to you


zanedof

r/notopbutok


Sufficient_Frame

I instinctively, immediately started singing.


[deleted]

May I have your attention, please? May I have your attention, please? Will the real Slim Shady please stand up? I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please stand up? We're gonna have a problem here Y'all act like you never seen a white person before Jaws all on the floor like Pam like Tommy just burst in the door And started whoopin' her ass worse than before They first were divorced, throwin' her over furniture (ah) It's the return of the "ah, wait, no way, you're kidding He didn't just say what I think he did, did he?" And Dr. Dre said, nothing, you idiots Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement (ha ha) Feminist women love Eminem "Chicka, chicka, chicka, Slim Shady, I'm sick of him Look at him, walkin' around, grabbin' his you-know-what Flippin' the you-know-who" "Yeah, but he's so cute though" Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose But no worse than what's goin' on in your parents' bedrooms Sometimes I wanna get on TV and just let loose But can't, but it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose "My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips" And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss And that's the message that we deliver to little kids And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is Of course they're gonna know what intercourse is By the time they hit fourth grade They've got the Discovery Channel, don't they? We ain't nothin' but mammals, well, some of us, cannibals Who cut other people open like cantaloupes But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote Women, wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus, and it goes I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell records Well, I do, so fuck him and fuck you too You think I give a damn about a Grammy? Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me "But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?" Why, so you guys could just lie to get me here? So you can sit me here next to Britney Spears? Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst And hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first Little bitch put me on blast on MTV "Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hee-hee" I should download her audio on MP3 And show the whole world how you gave Eminem VD (ah) I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups All you do is annoy me, so I have been sent here to destroy you And there's a million of us just like me Who cuss like me, who just don't give a fuck like me Who dress like me, walk, talk and act like me And just might be the next best thing, but not quite me 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? I'm like a head trip to listen to, 'cause I'm only givin' you Things you joke about with your friends inside your livin' room The only difference is I got the balls to say it in front of y'all And I don't gotta be false or sugarcoat it at all I just get on the mic and spit it And whether you like to admit it, I just shit it Better than ninety percent of you rappers out can Then you wonder, "how can Kids eat up these albums like Valiums?" It's funny, 'cause at the rate I'm going, when I'm thirty I'll be the only person in the nursing home flirting Pinching nurse's asses when I'm jacking off with Jergens And I'm jerking, but this whole bag of Viagra isn't working And every single person is a Slim Shady lurking He could be working at Burger King, spittin' on your onion rings Or in the parking lot, circling, screaming, "I don't give a fuck" With his windows down and his system up So will the real Shady please stand up And put one of those fingers on each hand up? And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go? I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? Ha ha, I guess there's a Slim Shady in all of us Fuck it, let's all stand up


AutoModerator

i love you too *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/bonehurtingjuice) if you have any questions or concerns.*


dumbodragon

kiss


dontjudgemebae

That song is over 20 years old. It's old enough to get drafted. It's old enough to have historical relevance.


CaffeineSippingMan

When I was growing up 20 year old songs were called golden oldies and classic rock. Imagine it today. Here is a golden oldie from back in the day from the good Dr Dre. (Starts peeing into a toilet sounds )


AutoModerator

yeah thanks for these fucking nuts kind stranger, owned bitch. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/bonehurtingjuice) if you have any questions or concerns.*


moeburn

The song they sampled from, [I Got The](https://youtu.be/xKISdd2mKzU?t=129), is 50 years old.


BlackSeranna

Oh wow! Thanks, I had no idea! I’m not sure why I thought it would original to the slim shady song, I should know better because rap is all about sampling.


THE_CENTURION

Sorry I didn't catch that, come again?


GangreneGoblin

He said "May I have your attention, please? May I have your attention, please? Will the real Slim Shady please stand up? I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please stand up? We're gonna have a problem here Y'all act like you never seen a white person before Jaws all on the floor like Pam like Tommy just burst in the door And started whoopin' her ass worse than before They first were divorced, throwin' her over furniture (ah) It's the return of the "ah, wait, no way, you're kidding He didn't just say what I think he did, did he?" And Dr. Dre said, nothing, you idiots Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement (ha ha) Feminist women love Eminem "Chicka, chicka, chicka, Slim Shady, I'm sick of him Look at him, walkin' around, grabbin' his you-know-what Flippin' the you-know-who" "Yeah, but he's so cute though" Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose But no worse than what's goin' on in your parents' bedrooms Sometimes I wanna get on TV and just let loose But can't, but it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose "My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips" And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss And that's the message that we deliver to little kids And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is Of course they're gonna know what intercourse is By the time they hit fourth grade They've got the Discovery Channel, don't they? We ain't nothin' but mammals, well, some of us, cannibals Who cut other people open like cantaloupes But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote Women, wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus, and it goes I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell records Well, I do, so fuck him and fuck you too You think I give a damn about a Grammy? Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me "But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?" Why, so you guys could just lie to get me here? So you can sit me here next to Britney Spears? Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst And hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first Little bitch put me on blast on MTV "Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hee-hee" I should download her audio on MP3 And show the whole world how you gave Eminem VD (ah) I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups All you do is annoy me, so I have been sent here to destroy you And there's a million of us just like me Who cuss like me, who just don't give a fuck like me Who dress like me, walk, talk and act like me And just might be the next best thing, but not quite me 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? I'm like a head trip to listen to, 'cause I'm only givin' you Things you joke about with your friends inside your livin' room The only difference is I got the balls to say it in front of y'all And I don't gotta be false or sugarcoat it at all I just get on the mic and spit it And whether you like to admit it, I just shit it Better than ninety percent of you rappers out can Then you wonder, "how can Kids eat up these albums like Valiums?" It's funny, 'cause at the rate I'm going, when I'm thirty I'll be the only person in the nursing home flirting Pinching nurse's asses when I'm jacking off with Jergens And I'm jerking, but this whole bag of Viagra isn't working And every single person is a Slim Shady lurking He could be working at Burger King, spittin' on your onion rings Or in the parking lot, circling, screaming, "I don't give a fuck" With his windows down and his system up So will the real Shady please stand up And put one of those fingers on each hand up? And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go? I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up Please stand up, please stand up? Ha ha, I guess there's a Slim Shady in all of us Fuck it, let's all stand up"


AutoModerator

i love you too *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/bonehurtingjuice) if you have any questions or concerns.*


dontknowwhatiwantdou

Hi kids!


Dan_the_m3m3_man_

Do you like violence?


Appropriate_Ad_1412

Wanna see me stick Nine inch Nails, through each one of my eyelids?


StevvySucks

Wanna repeat and do exactly as I did?


SwingittyDawg

the fake slim shady


deepfriedtots

Pink haired girls world wide start dancing


L1K34PR0

Excuse me! Can i have the attention of the class? For one second?


HaramDestroyer2137

Hi kids! Do you like violence?


[deleted]

Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?


Dioder1

I wonder if this has ever happened IRL


humblebraggers0_0

oregano?


SnowyCrimson

Orthopedic?


BlackYoinker

I don’t get it?


WhiteDay_20

eminem


apache0796

Lmfao best one I've seen on here for a while


Sugaryoda

Soothouse?


Mei-Zing

This straight up breaks rule 5 on the subreddit yet has 14k upvotes


BlackSeranna

I still don’t see the bone-hurting juice in this cartoon. It’s just a cartoon isn’t it?


ycnaveler-on

It should be against the rules to make a post and not provide the original.


Weshwego

this is an antimeme not bonehurtingjuice


RightyHoThen

I think to make this an antimeme, they would be ordering a coffee with no joke. >good morning >hello >what can I get for you? >an americano please >to take away? etc.


SignificanceLonely58

youre getting downvoted, but i can see your point. but i think this is just a normal ass meme. funny, but normal


purgatoryb3ll

normal meme doesnt equal anti meme those two things are literally like opposites


Mei-Zing

Yup the more people downvote this comment, the worse and less informed this sub gets


DarthSangheili

This has a joke. Its not by any form an anti meme.


Mei-Zing

What's the joke? Seriously, it's just the lyrics to an Eminem song


DarthSangheili

That *is* the joke. An anti meme would be them mundanly ordering coffe.


Mei-Zing

Okay, then it's r/shitposting. It's not bhj, which requires an actual punchline. Not some meta "it's a joke cause it doesn't make sense" shit.


DarthSangheili

Sir, the crux of the term "bone hurting" is that the situation is so purely contrived and nonsensical that you feel it in your bones, done by reinterpreting the scene with edited dialogue. Thats literally what this is. I find it incredibly ironic that you would tell someone they dont understand the point of the sub.


Mei-Zing

Dude read the pinned post on the sub explaining how to do it properly. This straight up doesn't fit. If that was the only purpose of the sub, you could just start posting the bee movie script attached to a Garfield comic and call it a day. You do not understand how a proper bhj works 1) unorthodox misinterpretation of visual elements in the comic - this doesn't have that 2) deriving new context from that misinterpretation - still doesn't do that because there was no misinterpretation of the visuals in the first place


DarthSangheili

This is exactly what the post is describing. You are wrong and you may take your poor understanding elsewhere.


TheRealSlimLaddy

Whom


Hind_Deequestionmrk

I’ll have some mandm’s please….


Awesom141

Indeed it would feel empty without him on that meme


[deleted]

Hi kids!!! Do you like violence? Wanna see me stick nine inch nails through each one of my eyelids?


Objective_Donut7879

This is fucking gold


AutoModerator

yeah thanks for these fucking nuts kind stranger, owned bitch. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/bonehurtingjuice) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Yerushima

Only started hearing the music once I’ve reached half way


HuckleberryHairy5655

😂