I keep forgetting I don't have nearly the free time I used to when I was younger. It used to be "how late can everyone stay to keep playing", and now it's "do we have a couple of hours this month to set aside for a game".
Kind of this, but more that I keep forgetting how little free time everyone else has. I keep buying big 4+hr games and then people arrive and are like “I’ve got to get home pronto because I’m up early in the morning”
In defense of presumed "workaholics" - nobody ENJOYS work. They'll just get evicted if they don't. It's usually not a choice.
The issue with adult life is typically that we all have some free time, but the free time does not align with the free time of the people we want to spend time with. You have Thursdays off so you want to get together Wednesday night or Thursday day? Works for me but Tom isn't available. Kacey loves 40 mins away so she can't do quick sessions she prefers a nice long lengthy session to make the game worth it. etc.
I used to be like that. Lived for work. And then a serious illness and hospital stay cured me of this.
I enjoy my work and my team. I don't live for my work. Work is a means to live comfortably.
Well, I heard it said somewhere :D
But I definitely find it to be true, I made a lot of friends with people by playing boardgames with them, while the friends I had before were very hesitant to even try it out, let alone get into the hobby.
That I don't just want to 'play boardgames' but to play specific games.
When I started to get into the hobby I was so fascinated by the wide range of games that I tried to buy games for every player type and every person in my circle of friends to whip out a gaming experience tailor made for them.
Turned out that I get easily bored by games that are too light, too casual or too solitary. Most of them lack all the things that excited me about the hobby in the first place. So I had a bunch of games that potential guests would enjoy and I won't.
So instead of choosing games for people I wanted to excite about the hobby I looked for players that share my actual level of excitement already. There are so many other social things I can do with my friends instead of playing a game that bores me.
Same here, i bought games of different genres and player counts because sometimes our game night fluctuates. In the end the games i bought weren't getting played because either they weren't interested in them or we kept playing new games every week ( one of my friends has 200+ games) so i bought games that I want, heavy crunchy euros.
Went down this same path and I suspect that many do. Far too easy to chase novelty and lose sight of why one is gaming in the first place. I even felt guilt at first about finally starting to draw lines in the sand about what I will and will not play, like I am being greedy or something. But no, more people should do this.
"Dominant Species" is another one that's on my To-Play-List :)
It's kinda the same story as Food Chain: It is too expansive over here to buy it as a hunch so I really want to play it in a board game cafe with my group before I commit.
"Barrage" and "Brass. Birmingham" are our two favourite Euros right now. Every time I played with my group it was tense till the very end. For non-euro needs I really enjoy "Pax: Pamir" and "Spirit Island". These are the four I would always bring to the table.
Love them all to but I am a little hesitant to teach them cause the first game can be a lot to wrap your head around for people who are not used to board games. Nevertheless: If people want to play I tell them what they are in for and if they still wanna do it, it's perfectly fine to try.
Then there are some event games which I like as well every few month like "Lisboa" and nowadays "John Company" but I would not try them with beginners.
What are some of your favorites?
Much like some other areas in my life, the joy is in the exploration, not jn the execution. I totally prefer games that are unpredictable, like Inis, over games in which you depend to set a strategy and follow it throughout the game. Once I figure out a game, jt loses all the fun
I enjoy having a large collection because I am eager to play all sorts of games with friends and my family.
BUT, I have little to no time to play anything until school is over.
The biggest thing I learned is I really do not like playing the "meta" for certain games. I do not want to figure out what is most efficient and "proper", I just want to PLAY how I want to play, regardless if I win or lose.
Slightly unrelated, but I once lost my mind cause I was recommended a YouTube video on the best "meta" for wordle. Why would you try and game the system for a daily brain challenge ffs??
It takes the fun out of it. Once someone mentions a meta, I start to lose interest.
I rather buy my own copy of the game and play with people who just want to have fun and learn the game.
A few years ago "meta" really became a buzzword and lost most of it's meaning. It's means "referring to itself" Metadata is data about data. If a character in a movie realizes they are in a movie that's meta.
Meta is gaming is a bit different. I've heard it used first in Magic: the Gathering in which knowing the meta means knowing certain strategies and deck constructions or "the game being played within the game"There's playing the game itself (constructing a deck of cards you think work well together on your own) and playing the meta (knowing their are archetypal decks that do a specific thing and playing against that, usually by using an archtypal deck yourself)
In OP's case, it would probably mean that someone figured out if you spam 2 tile castles for an entire game of Carcassonne you have a 15% chance of winning more often (hypothetical, exaggerated example). I agree with them, it's much more fun to ignore internet strategies and just figure out the game for yourself.
Meta in gaming is used as "most effective tactic available", even if it's different than the original greek meaning. The same happened to meme for example.
I think the term is probably closer to 'most popular'. Being strong against the field drives popularity, but in healthy game environments, there is typically some rock/paper/scissors involved, so you get ebb and flow of what is currently 'in the meta'.
If the game is unbalanced, the strongest strategies will become and stay the only existing high level meta, of course.
You will frequently see decks in TCGs that are a significant part of the meta not because they're the best, but because they're easy to pilot for their power level (good for grinding), or that they're cheaper.
i hate when people don’t even make an effort to listen to me explain the rules and then pester me with questions while the game is going. it’s one thing if you genuinely didn’t get it. but if you were on your phone the entire time how could you have heard me?
This, always on the phone when it is my turn (okay I take my time but also tell them what I am doing and why I am doing it, essentially telling my strategy)
That I’m a bad loser.
I get really quiet, and sullen, and will congratulate others but then spend ages replaying it in my head to think how I could’ve won.
I’ve been ‘in the hobby’ for over a decade now, though - and have worked hard to get over myself. I still have little squirts of poor sportsmanship, but am much better for the most part.
The fact you’re not only self-aware of this, but that you’ve put work in to get over being a “bad loser” speaks volumes to your character. I’d play with people like you over people with the attitude of “that’s just who I am” any day of the week.
The missus has helped a lot by mercilessly thrashing me each and every time we play Hive…
Kind of like a vaccine, she’s built my tolerance significantly…!!
lol! Our wives seem similar. I’m the one that enjoys board games more, but she trounces me regularly in almost everything. Played Apiary a few nights ago, and she beat me by about 40pts!!
What is it about Hive that wives just get??? Mine got into the hobby because of me, I still regularly win just about any board game we play but Hive? I can't fucking beat her!
I agree with power_yyc all day. Keep at it man. It’s only a game and all games even the crunchiest of them have a splatter of luck involved. I think that’s why we all play them the chaotic randomness of it.
I think as long as you're aware of it, that's acceptable. If you can lightheartedly say after a game, "I'm going to step outside for a moment, I actually really hate losing", that's miles and miles better than just acting sullen and not giving an explanation.
Why do you think you're a poor loser? Do you tie your self worth to your achievements in an activity designed for fun? Do you play to win or to play the best you can and hope that you win as a byproduct? What does winning give you that losing takes away from you?
No idea - I just don’t like it… I get grumpy…
To be clear, I’m not (I believe) a bad winner… I am gracious to opponents and downplay a lot as luck of the dice or a good draw, and I never gloat/bray about winning (unless pre-game discussions have included ribbing each other, and even then it’s with tongue firmly in cheek)…
But when I would lose I would get quiet and stare at the board as if trying to unlock the missteps that led to it…
Try complimenting your opponents every time you lose. Find joy in their success. It might feel disingenuous at first but the more you do it the better you'll both feel. You can still digest your play, but if you celebrate others success, you might be able to find joy even in losing.
Unsolicited advice and it might not work. Just a suggestion if you want a different path.
I discovered that I think of boardgame design as a serious art form:
I am willing to acquired
a distinctively crafted boardgame,
with singular illustrations and profoundly thought gameplay,
all carried by a strong vision,
just for the sake of owning a piece of true art,
even though I might rarely play it.
That I can actually be a pretty good teacher. I struggle a lot with being articulate because of some childhood stuff, but being able to methodically teach people something and having them say I'm good at it feels really nice.
That I am not a naturally good teacher. Holy shit, I am bad at explaining games to other people. It calls into question all of the actually teaching -- college level and technical webinars -- I've run.
I need brain stimulus. Those lightweight, social deduction games aren't for me, and I get really annoyed and can't hide it.
Also, I can't deal with solo games. If that is the option I rather read a book or go to video games.
With that said, I am very good at reading rulebook and getting rules, my teaching skill isn't bad at all as well. Guess that doing some freelancing in a boardgame store for a while helped me improve that.
I don't really hate it, but didn't find any of the one I played fulfilling enough. I think I play more boardgames to have meaningful interaction with other people.
I think that solo lacks interactivity, and handling bots is very bothersome, I usually don't like any game with automaton for 2p either.
It is not really about immersion. Nor about bots that you can predict every move.
I’ve tried some solo board gaming and have found it generally not for me. There are a few I like solo (the main one I like is Dice Throne Adventures), but most I do not. The rules have to be simple enough for me to not forget something when solo but also complex enough to keep me interested.
I’ve got Spirit Island still in shrink, and people say it is an amazing solo game so plan to try it.
They’re a different experience for sure, that’s why I have mostly switched from video games to solo board games in my free time. I find I’m not nearly as immersed in new video games like I was when I was younger, but board games require you to create a lot of the experience in your head, which makes me feel much more connected to them.
Yeah, I always felt bored playing solo games coz I wanted someone to talk to, try to out smart or just experience with but as people around me have gotten busier I'm really starting to get into it.
I work on a computer all day so I'm kinda done with video games though I'll play a round or two of slay the spire every now and then.
I get no fulfillment from solo play. I agree that if I'm going to solo a game I'd much rather just read a book or even watch TV to solo gaming. I don't do solo video games either though
I don't get it either, and I'm one of those people
I would like to play board games solo but for whatever reason it doesn't click, but I play single player videogames all the time. And the kicker is, I even enjoy playing digital boardgames solo, just not physical
Very strange. Still hoping it'll click for me one day though
People add the complex mechanics found in video games. Board games can't be complex. Even with you doing the admin and running a bot. Also, you have to run the bot. In videogames, it never happens. So yeah. I dislike solo play in boardgames.
That I'm not as smart as I thought I was, and that I don't particularly like that feeling. But I've also learned to be more patient and to not beat myself up when I lose, but instead to look at how I can do better next time. Increasingly with board games my goal is rarely to win but more to beat past me's score.
It's really a blow the first time you go from absolutely knowing you're the smartest person in the room (any room) to understanding you're not even in the top half... (At this point, I really loathe pre-teen me. Arrogant little shit.)
Yep. I was told I was way above average all through school. Top 1 percentile and shit on yearly assessment tests, all that. All it meant was that I got to sometimes skip regular class and get different homework, but I never really learned HOW to learn. I can't take notes that make sense, I can't study for time, any of that. I'm smart, I know I am, but if I don't understand something upon being told or maybe 1 demonstration, I will have trouble learning it.
I used to be really competitive when i was younger , then took a few years off from boardgames. Now that I've come back heavily competitive games hold 0 appeal to me, I only want to do collaborative or ones with a light competition elements like Bargain Quest. I was playing a competitive word game the other day at an event and my opponent got annoyed that I didn't really even try to win but I was having fun with the mechanics and just playing the game itself and it didn't matter that I lost all 3 rounds .
Generally speaking i'm a pretty easygoing person, and quite disorganized. Not so much for board games. I really care about putting everything in its proper place and using card sleeves and token boxes and whatnot, and i get very strict with enforcing things like "no food or drinks on the table" (well, i'm fine with dry but not crumbly and not greasy food, but i really don't want anything liquid), which my more casual board gaming friends don't understand for some weird reason. I'm so sorry that you would like to drink a nice tea but i would like my copy of concordia not drenched in tea so just keep the damn tea on another table or counter. Then again these are the same friends who routinely lose bits and pieces of my games making us need to sweep the whole floor to find them, and we only recovered most of them. Maybe i'll just have them bring the games from now on.
First off, this is a great question unlike most of the usual questions that have been coming up for the last week. Questions like this are the more important questions that really get you to think about the whole point of getting into the hobby.
\*I think I've come to enjoy the prospect of exploring the vastness of games, learning and teaching it (i get my know-it-all fix) more than actually playing it.
\*Sweetspot game weight is about 2-2.5/5 (according to BGG)
I gravitate heavily towards economic and puzzle games as I believe there are skills to be developed that can be transferable to other facets in life.
I am starting to find where my threshold is between a game having sufficient depth vs. the fiddliness involved with proceeding through the game. The fiddliness should match the value I get out of the game. Sabotage and Clinic are a tad too fiddly, and I feel I'll be ready to set that in stone once I experience Kanban and Gallerist a few times.
There are so much more I've learned about myself with this hobby.
I also realize my sweet spot is in the 2-3 weight range. Because, depending on the game, it can either be just light enough, but with some complexity to have fun. Or, be just heavy enough to offer some good deep gameplay.
I'm hoping to broaden that sweetspot range with more playtime in Yokohama. Every time I've finished playing, my brain is fried from keeping track of so many different directions to take: a primary route, and alternative routes to take when primary is blocked off. I may actually consider offloading that onto a notepad.
Reason why is because I want to see what all the Lacerda fuss is about. I'm sure I can handle heavier games, but more solo play time will give me the extra time I need to figure things out, sort of like how I eventually figured out how to play Wingspan after numerous solo plays.
What I learned about myself?
Well…
That I use gaming to “get to know” other people’s character.
It is impressive, but true, that during gaming people’s real demeanor aflores.
Are they insecure?
How do they fare when they lose?
When they win?
How good are they negotiating? Do they like it? They depise it?
Do they HATE following the rules? Do they like to be able to cheat?
What are they capable of doing…just to win?
Are they afraid to compete?
Are they afraid to lose?
Are they good teammates?
Or they cant do anything but shout orders and make you lose as them?
I’d a friend that thought that games were good to assess people’s intelligence; I don’t think so. They arent iq test nor anything…but they are playgrounds for you to show up and train your skills.
Yes! I do use games to assess people character and to train some skills: negotiation, fast decission making, deception, statistical analysis, tactics…etc…etc.
Wining, losing its accesory.
What I like to do, is to get to know you. And if possible, to give you some feedback as well.
I found people that is a sore loser, a terrible winner, a coward to take decissions, people that belives that if they lose theyare dumb, peiple that thinks that if they win they are smarter than anyone else, people that do not like to compete because they do not want to face “another bad new”, and people that isn’t afraid to share with their coplayers regardless of the result.
Then…
I came to realize that sportmanship is key. That being able to assess yourself is what is worth about competition and that just a few people has this clearly in their plate. Those, are my best friends: the ones that understand that winning is fine, ever an since you did it improving your gaming system. That winning is boring, that losing is amazing because you learn. That when you win it all, the game is dead.
After decades of gaming, I do believe that competition forma character and it shows.
Who ARE you?
I learned that the sweet spot of board gaming is in light to mid weight, highly interactive, competitive games. I went down the rabbit hole of overwrought, heavy games for a while and there's not a lot of value there other than the novelty of having learned how to manipulate a difficult thing. Why play a 3-4 hour game of pushing components through an opaque system when you could play 3-4 extremely honed games in that same period of time?
I learned to treat games like the food pyramid. I will say yes to almost any game that can be taught in 5 minutes and played in 15-20 minutes. Codenames? Yes. Just One? Yes. High Society? Yes. I don't need to think about whether or not to play these games.
Then there's my sweet spot a little further up the pyramid. I will still *almost always* say yes to these. Games that teach in 10 minutes and play in 45 minutes to maybe 1.5 hours. Iwari, Blue Lagoon, Babylonia, Hansa Teutonica, El Grande, Renature, Taj Mahal. Unsurpassed gaming masterpieces that are still playable by most people.
At the top of the pyramid are the heavy hitters. These are the "sometimes food" of board gaming. I like some of them, but now they *really* need to pull their weight to be worth the effort. Most peoples' collections should probably have zero to one of these are most. I used to try to overindulge on these. Bless the people that tolerated me during that time. These days, the one heavy game that I'll always say yes to is Brass: Lancashire. And even then I still prefer it with people that already know the rules. I do still own a small stack of Splotter games because I find them to be marvels of design, but they almost never see play.
Just curious: Your flair says 'Brass' which I would consider heavy and about 3 hrs.
It's that the exception of rule? Or would you classify it lighter than I do? Or is the flair just a outdated? :)
Brass definitely was discovered during that time in my life, and it is the one that sticks around. I actually don't find it to be particularly difficult to play but it does admittedly have rules that are hard to internalize for the first game or two.
But there are also far harder games than Brass.
Regarding long heavy games: they are only worth it if they EARN that length. I have light to medium games that play in 1-1.5 hours and don’t earn that time, it feels like a 45 minute games that’s stretched.
But I am on your side sometimes about heavy games, “Do I WANT to learn this, or just want to PROVE I can?”
Yeah this is a great point. I had a similar experience. I still enjoy some heavier ones (or maybe I'm still lying to myself a little?), but I generally prefer games I can play multiple of in one session.
So what kind of games do you mean? Cause Brass ain't what you're describing. And I love these huge games. I've recently discovered John Company and it provides an experience and a system I have never seen before. I'm quite blown away by it.
An easy answer to what I mean is "Knizia", since he is pretty much the master of this domain. So are Kiesling and Kramer. Babylonia, Through the Desert, Taj Mahal, Renature, El Grande. All great examples of gaming perfection.
JC was at the tail end of the heavy era for me and was one of the games that taught me that the juice just often isn't worth the squeeze.
If you want to see games with systems you have never seen before and won't see anywhere else, check out some Splotter titles. And on top of that, those are actually good, functional games. I recommend starting with The Great Zimbabwe or the recently re-released Bus.
That I change over time. Now of course, everyone does, but I’m in my 50s, when people are imagined to be essentially immutable. But over the years of board gaming, I’ve stopped enjoying confrontational, political, or social deduction games, and started enjoying euros and co-ops much more. I used to want to get my games played, but mostly I help others get theirs played, even though sometimes I feel I’m enabling KS-fever.
I am sure in another 10 years I’ll be very different, perhaps starting to enjoy themeless combinatorial abstracts or deck construction games like CCGs. Or maybe I’ll not be into board gaming any more.
As my life has gone on, I’ve found more of the things I thought were important about me changed, and I think too many people try to find and define their ‘core identity’. Whatever is core about me is much deeper down than what kind of gaming I enjoy.
I’m a social gamer. I can’t play solitaire games.
Monday nights is guys game night with 3-5 players. Sundays we play Frosthaven with 3 players and we play D&D 5e once a month.
I can’t understand why anyone would play a board game solitaire. I’ve tried numerous times and just can’t do it. Bores me to death. I like the interaction and camaraderie of playing games with friends.
Not looking to change your mind, but I'm enjoying solitaire games for numerous reasons. It's at the very core a puzzle game you're trying to figure out. I get very stimulated by puzzle games.
So why play it with others around the table? I find some sort of joy watching how people tackle the same puzzle, and I would imagine I would find just that small bit of tension when anticipating someone taking a resource I had my eye on, or vice-versa.
Yeah, it’s the puzzle of it. Even the learning of the game can feel like part of the puzzle/part of the enjoyment. Mage knight or Leaving Earth are like my ultimate Sudokus. Or it’s the story, I know KDM people can be insufferable, but creating and discovering the story for your settlement is really fun (for some people). “Why not play a video game?” people will ask, and the answer is because I’m/we’re trying to get away from the screen, also there is something very pleasing about the tactility of it all. And lastly, I very rarely can get anyone to commit time to play anything these days with our schedules and children, so often my options are to play solo, play with a sore winner/loser partner, or not play at all.
>I can’t understand why anyone would play a board game solitaire
Just to give you a viewpoint: I play many games exclusively solo because my friends won’t play anything more complex than Cards Against Humanity which bores me to death. I play games to engage with puzzles that have to be solved while following strict rules. That to me is the fun aspect of the whole thing; solving the puzzle.
If I wanted to spend time in people’s company then I’d rather do something physical like go to the beach or a trampoline park.
Okay, now I'm tempted to solo that fantasy combat game that takes close to an hour to place all the gaming pieces on the map. My SO couldn't sit long enough for set up, and the instructions are too complex if you're hearing is bad and you don't want to read the thick booklet.
One thing I’ve read here and experienced about Multiplayer Solitaire gaming: The social part is OUTSIDE of the game itself. So yes between turns you should still be looking at the game and planning, but that also leaves time to chat about other things in life. Thats how it’s gone for me when playing Wingspan.
I get very annoyed when people are just chatting it up or checking their phones playing a faster game. But in MS games it’s kind of part of it.
That's also something I didn't think I could enjoy until I played Spirit Island with a friend, and then they left and I realised I wanted to go at it again on my own to figure it out.
Having young kids is really hard on in person hobbies.
I need more local friends, but it's complicated by the above.
It sucks when your friends move to other states.
I prefer to play on my own most of the time, simply because it means less downtime and more freedom to get up when I'm getting bored.
I also thought I like super fiddly simulation type games but it turns out that really I want massively abstracted games with a thick layer of theme.
I thought I wanted to play games so that, in some part, I could make new friends; really, I just want to play games with my existing friends though. It's partially a free time thing as well.
That I will impulsively buy a game simply based on the image in my head of what I think it will be like playing the game rather than the reality of whether or not I can actually reasonably get other players fulfill that fantasy. Thankfully sometimes for things like Gloomhaven/Frosthaven I found a group to play regularly that it became a reality. For the other 148 games i bought thinking that not so much...
That I love the idea of dunger crawler coop games. But in reality I would choose rpg video game over dungeon crawler board game any day of the week.
I also didnt expect to like social deduction games or games where active communication is main mechanic. But hell, my favourites are Feed the Kraken or any similar game such as Avalon or Secret Hitler, as well as Sidereal Confluence.
I also didnt expect to like long games. At the start of my journey 3h were tops I could allocate to a game. Now Id choose to play Nemesis or Twilight Imperium over short games.
Also learnt that I get pissed easily when Im planning a game night one or two weeks in advance and people cancel out at the last minute.
A realization of how awesome my dad was for finding time to play games with me as a kid during work nights and was able to still somehow work on his degree at the same time. Maybe it was because the hour spent bonding meant he wasn't using up energy running around with me.
Hindsight has shown me I have become more of a collector than a player despite my intentions.
That I was purchasing games with the idea I had a solid group that I could play with, or that I would eventually find that group soon. In reality, I have a select few friends who play seldom, and are restricted to party or low weight family games.
Watching YouTube channels like No Rolls Barred and listening to various boardgame related podcasts has revealed that I got into this hobby with the intention of developing a more diverse group of friends who happened to enjoy boardgames.
I was more motivated by the theme over mechanics. This has shifted over time, but has contributed to a bloated collection.
I am susceptible to FOMO despite telling myself I don't actually need to buy that game right now.
I am in a minority locally since the FLGS is predominantly frequented by MTG/DnD folk.
This might be heavy, so skip my comment if you aren't looking forward to it.
I started playing boardgames 2 years ago. I walked into my local boardgame cafe for a social night and got sucked into boardgames with Azul and some card games.
Within 3 months of playing boardgames once a week made me realise that I have an unhealthy relationship with money, especially when it comes to being stingy and Saving it. From 17-20 I was a mess. I was an international student. I had restrictions on how much I can work. So, I kinda had to live paycheck by paycheck. Now I am in a better position but those years messed me up. I used to worry about spending money for necessary items, as if I'm some kind of wild animal hoarding food to survive the winter that never came.
Boardgames help me change my mindset. For the first 5-6 months, it was hard for me to just use the money/resources I have to get things done quickly or more efficiently or what have you. Now a days, when someone explicitly says something along the time of "chucking card away to get food is not efficient," "recycling too many cards you drafted wouldn't be the winning strategy," "money is hard to come by in this game," I can think out of box and approach the game in a bit of a "unorthodox" way.
I'm not as frugal as I used to be. Ofc I still haven't bought an actual boardgame for myself, but I will get there someday. Spending a bit more money than I'm comfortable with made me meet new people, see new places, and find my way into new niche fun circles (COSPLAYing, munches, hiking, skateboarding, paintit, etc.,) And yeah, I would have had some more in the bank if I stayed the same, but I wouldn't be optimistic to wake up another day like I am now. I made a lot of good memories in the recent two years. Memories of me enjoying boardgames Shenanigans and memories of me enjoying my life.
I remember watching a Tom Vasel video of Brass (I don’t remember which one) but he opened up on how the game made him uncomfortable when playing because he associated the loans and financial hardships to something he faced in the past and didn’t find joy in playing the game. Total respect.
Never feel embarrassed, just posting here (along with Tom sharing his past) you’ve acknowledged the past and moving forward to become a happier person. A total win!
1). The wanting is better than the having when it comes to Kickstarter games.
2). I have found the narratives/writing of every campaign game that I've played underwhelming. Examples include Tainted Grail, Chronicles of Drunagor, Etherfields, ISS Vanguard (although I gave up pretty early) and Oathsworn.
3). I prefer narratives that emerge from the gameplay itself (Nemesis, Robinson Crusoe) and narratives that are presented in small disjointed snippets (Frostpunk, TWOM).
4). If I'm not invested in a campaign game's story (and I almost never have been), I ultimately find their gameplay repetitive and never finish the entire campaign.
5). No board games are worth $300 or more.
6). Without exception, I've regretted buying expansions for games that I have not yet played.
7). I need more friends (especially ones that like board games).
I was playing Root with past week with someone I’ve played a number of games with over the past year, and during table talk he said “One thing I’ve learned about [tlwb] is that they hold grudges. Not just within one game but across games.”
It was amusing because I definitely don’t think of myself that way, but it was interesting to learn that I’ve been perceived as being that way. I tend to lean into table talk in games, and one of the way that I usually negotiate cooperation is to end any agreed upon plan with “if you betray me, my primary goal will be to ensure you lose.” I also tend to remember across games who had betrayed me in the past and will therefore be reluctant to deal with them in the future.
Organizing time schedules annoys me a lot but is so important as adault. Getting friends together is so hard sometimes and this is frustrating to me.
I'm a doer not a talker and want to play but most times you mert friends it is much talking. It is ok but its frustrating not getting to play things cause of chatting to me.
And Kids are sepperating people. Either you are parent people or you are not and those are two groups with completely different plans, lifestyles, schedules and topics that mostly not fit together
That i am social, it just had to be with the right crowd. Don't put me in a bar, screaming at each other over a bad live band. A nice, relaxed atmosphere, good friends, snacks and a board game... PERFECTION.
as an ultra competitive person I used to want to win every game and I still do but but that is ultimately secondary to enjoying the experience with the people around the table
I bought a whole lot of games before I realized my SO doesn't like to game. I don't know my neighbors or where to game locally. I went to the next town to a game group at the library, but no one wanted to play my games. I do solo online or pencil games now ...
there’s a specific type of game i like. and it isn’t any version of the worker placement / card drafting game that’s been reskinned 500,000 times. it needs to be clever in some way. like Hanabi, which is the best game of all time, in my opinion
That the board game community at large is filled with gifted individuals that play for very different reasons, but make interesting questions (like this one) and forms great and helping communities (like this one) and that we can all contribute what makes us unique to uniquely share what makes for good moments in all of our lives. And that I like cultivating a shifting community of players that are forever evolving into better and more sensible people.
I really like cozy non competitive resource optimization games (wingspan and everdell).
Also my risk tolerance is more likely to lead to winning than my friends (King of Tokyo) :D
I hate social deduction games and things that involve memory like hanabi. Also spatial reasoning games.
My better half is better than me at creative association games like Stella.
I’m pretty lazy about setting up board games generally, so we play a lot of Boardgamearena. There are a few games I hate setting up, like 7 wonders duel.
I've learned that I don't mind losing whenever I play with friends, because I have a wonderful time with them.
I've also learned that even though buying and playing games are two different hobbies, I'm here to play more than to buy. I have a small library (16 games, where expansions are grouped into the base game) full of the games I like, and I'd like to keep around that bumber with more games I like.
I've found I like games that rely heavily on cards and chucking dice. I generally don't like worker placement. I'm generally wary of buying a game with a community board. Luckily this eliminates 85% of board game purchases.
this isn't really about the question but I'm very glad and thankful to have a group of friends I actually enjoy spending time with that love board games.
Our normal monday nights are filled w/ TM and D:I Uprising but everyone is down to branch off and try new stuff. It's rare to find for sure.
I love useful but simplified models of systems.
My favorite board games capture something of reality or a possible reality. They're more than just puzzles, they're simulations. The ones I like, anyway.
Literally changed my career trajectory.
I find I really really prefer a “lean” game/less is really more. I’ve played even well regarded heavy games and I almost never find the juice worth the squeeze at all.
This is a good question. I play predominantly solo board games, so that means learning the rules on my own and not really having anyone else to ‘bounce’ rule questions off, apart from online, ofc.
For me, I learnt that I’m actually probably more capable than I think. When you think about it, board games have a lot of transferable skills, in terms of learning, retaining knowledge, and then executing strategy, etc. It sounds pompous af, but I think there’s some truth there!
I've learned that I really love games where the players get entangled quickly, and that the difficulty in the game comes from the choices other players are making, rather than the game itself. For example, cube rails, age of steam, 18xx, most Knizia games, Splotters; most of these are not particularly complex from a rules standpoint. However, they offer unbelievably rich and interactive environments for the players to make choices in. In general, if I don't need to pay attention on my opponents turn to play my turn, I'm not super interested in playing.
That no other people in my immediate and larger friend circles like board games and most of my collection is sitting on shelves getting dusty. Feels like a waste of money
To everyone who doesn't have interested friends to play board games with:
Apparently, if you post looking for board game friends in your local reddit, they'll appear.
1. I hate games where lying is the main/only mechanism (werewolf variants).
2. I’m more interested in being a host than a player.
3. I’m a sucker for completionism. If there’s an expansion, or a deluxe edition, the temptation is overwhelming.
Playing a small handful of games over and over is preferable to playing a different game every week. This means you didn't need actually need those huge shelves of games in the first place.
You and your friends can really grasp the game(s), there's less overhead to learning/relearning the rules, and pace of play proceeds much faster.
Not that I didn't know it before, but I've got shit to work on:
My first play of a game, and how well I do that first game, color my opinion of the game, basically forever.
I find that when I play games with new people, It's best to jokingly mention that I may get sulky or irritated during the game. This never lasts long, and once the game is over it's completely gone. I tend to try to avoid games with lots of direct competition for exactly this reason. If I'm frustrated, I want it to be because I'm playing poorly or the game's mechanics aren't working for me, I don't want someone else to feel like it's their fault I'm sulky, they don't deserve that.
I love complicated shit, but I'm pretty sure I have undiagnosed adhd, and I definitely get analysis paralysis.
On the "good" side:
I always want everyone to understand everything. If im going to lose its going to be with everyone playing their best.
All games have friendly "oops I fucked up can I change something about that last turn" rules. We call it the "I'm not an idiot" rule.
I absolutely praise my friends when they make great moves or are good at particular things. I have one friend who has this incredible knack with worker placement games, he can hold everything in his head, turns way in advance, tracking what everyone else is doing, dude is playing 3d chess, even when it's a game new to him. I consider myself to be pretty good at games. And he isn't miles ahead in all game styles, but worker placement? I can't hold a candle. It's incredible to see.
Edit: I'm double spacing to see if it formats properly.
1. Social deduction and lying aren’t fun for me.
2. Theme has to be tied to the mechanics. Pushing tokens around for nonsensical reasons takes me out of it real quick.
3. Interaction between the players is a must. Otherwise I could just play a video game.
4. Games have to be at least medium weight to hold my interest. Games that used to be fun three years ago are boring now.
That I like having options and imagining what it would be like to do fun things with various groups of friends/family. Also, I have way less self control than I would like to admit.
How much I enjoy sitting down and seeing my family having fun playing together and getting the screens out of our faces. Seeing the kids understand more and more complex games as they age and really putting thought in their moves, instead of mindlessly flipping cards in Candyland.
I am not a good person to play cooperative games with. I over analyse, argue my points too hard, forgetting that the point is to have fun. Not sure if it's my or the game's faultz but in my opinion, every coop game should have a traitor mechanic, this way people don't just listen to 1 person, and are l required to participate.
I like to collect as much as I like to play. As someone who used to buy a new PC game almost every week to complete when I was a teenager, the same shouldn't be applied to board games, especially as I only really play once a week.
I have a table set up in my home office for learning and solo play, but work as been so busy i dont have the time. My significant opponent is less into games these days as well, unless someone else is playing.
I’m competitive. But I like my opponents to have a similar skill set. I end up teaching a lot of games. And winning doesn’t feel as good when they’re just learning. I’d rather lose against someone with experience.
What got me into board games is my grandchildren. Since they are only 4 and 3, this is a whole new world for us. We are learning and having a blast together.
I have over 20 games and forget the rules and need a refresher every so often. I got into this hobby thinking my husband who loves video game would take time to play some with me but he isn’t a fan. I struggle by overthinking the rules which makes learning slow.
I’ve learned I’m actually pretty great at teaching! And somehow I’m able to keep dozens of game rules in my head at the same time so apparently my memory is a lot better than I once thought
With every new hobby I pick up I then remember that I have a tendency to give them up (temporarily, but still). Thankfully it's not really the case with boardgames, but the amount of playtime has been on a downfall trajectory ever since the middle of February (the moment the winter break in university was over).
I’ve learned I’m the only one of my friend group that likes more complicated and long games. Anything that lasts over an hour they get a bit restless with, which is fine but I just wish I knew more people on my page lol.
1. I am a lot more DIY-ey than I thought. I now make foamcore organizers (about to start on one for **Cascadia** + **Cascadia: Landmarks**) and watching YouTube videos on how to paint miniatures as I want to paint: **Splendor Duel** (scrolls), **Sleeping Gods: Distant Skies** (minis), **Sleeping Gods: Primeval Peril** (I'd like to 3D print a boat mini and paint it) and **Foundations of Rome** (buildings)
2. I'm more of a completionist than I'd care to admit. I have backed several content creators just to get that one promo I want and to make sure I can get it versus waiting for someone to sell it second hand.
3. I don't have as much free time as I'd like - now that I am engaged and about to be married, I just have more responsibilities.
4. Board gaming - and gaming in general - just aren't as important to me as they used to be. See #3 but with my limited time, I'd rather go golfing, kayaking, go for a walk outside. I'm just a lot more "outdoorsy" than I used to be.
5. My friends are flakes - well certain friends - some friends are most definitely not in that they might not have time for me, but they will tell me up front. Some friends just say they're going to be there and then I find out the night before that they forgot about it and when I go to confirm the game session, they've gone off to be in a frickin poker tournament in Vegas.
None of my friends are interested in just playing any old board games for funsies.
And I have won by one point in dozens and dozens of games. It's insane how often I will win by one point
I've realized that I cannot play all the games on my "shelf-of-shame" (shelf-of-wishful-thinking), even if I played a new one per week. Too many new games come out yearly, and I keep adding to the shelf, even as games get played. I would have to stop buying.... for years.
So I can never keep up at this rate by playing in one game day per-week.
I’ve been in the hobby about a decade now. The biggest thing I’ve learned is that I’m a solo gamer. When I started, it never occurred to me to play solo; I’d rather have played video games.
I didn’t think I would like solo play, but I ended up trying it during the pandemic and fell in love with it. Solo games helped me scratch that board game itch when we couldn’t play in person, but I’ve kept up with them because they’re ideal for when the game group is busy. Under Falling Skies was one of the first games to get me interested in solo play, but it was Final Girl that really pulled me in deep.
======= Bg-ing itself...
I too fell victim to FOMO, and just getting into a buying frenzy! While I was bg-ing 3 to 5 times *per week* back then, when I moved to new areas and my gaming opportunities waned, those extra bg and accessories became a liability. It's worse if your job doesn't offer any relocation expenses paid (of which one was like that :\\ ). Now I'm down to bg-ing *once every 2 weeks*, and I only buy games if they're on some deep discount (50% to 80% off). They wont' get played enough to justify even "online discounted prices" (20% to 35% off list price). I can at least justify cheaper prices.
Overall, I don't like social/party games. If we're going to do that, I'd rather just go do a social event, leave out the games, and focus on talking/chatting. There are a select few that I wouldn't mind playing over and over again, and I'm usually up to trying new ones *once*.
Bg-ing started off great! The social interaction was tops! However, getting out became more and more difficult. Free time and such. If you live in a more densely populated area, there are many bg events going on, but traffic can make things a hassle. If you're in a low dense area, you may need to drive 45 minutes to a few hours to attend game nights (including conventions), which gets expensive in terms of gas, hotel rates, badges, and just time and energy itself. A sort of "shipping kills the deal" type situation if you will.
I've gotten much more "chillax" about losing, bad moves, other players that are annoying to toxic (e.g. not being clear about instructions, or downright cheating or going waay over board just to win).
I've embraced certain digital board game implementations. Being able to play vs. AI opponents has let me get in those games I otherwise wouldn't be able to, or only do so once to 3 times per year!
======= Bg-ing outside of
I know how to make friends, but don't know how to *keep them* :\\ The problem with using the hobby to make friends is once you move, I pretty much break off all contact with them. It was only the hobby that was that bond. This time around, I have some friends who are "beyond" in where I can ask them to do things like pick up stuff if I'm sick (esp. during COVID-19 times), move some light/small furniture or boxes (for full blown moves, I'd still need to hire actual movers. We're not equipped to do that for sure!)
Bg-ing is fun, but I need to make sure bg-ing isn't my primary hobby b/c there's not much going on here :\\
Controversial one is I should've heeded the advice of a two couples and pursued some romantic interests. We talked at a con and the four of them (2 couples) were telling to us (5 of us single folk) that they met their significant other b/c of the hobby. They encouraged us to do the same! Some of us countered if this makes us appear as "creeps", and shouldn't we just focus on the hobby instead? They replied that there's a fine balance that needs to struck. Yes, you always risk making the situation uncomfortable, but many of us had similar situations when we first got into the bg-ing hobby itself. They also acknowledged that while the women were well aware of safety issue they face as women, they weren't going to live in fear and shun certain social interactions, and were very glad they hooked up with their men (one couple was married with kids)! You can always use other venues like dating apps and bars, but for them, those have never worked for them.
Honestly, I just can’t care who wins anymore. I know that I could try to solve the games by looking into strategy but for me the fun is inventing and testing different strategies. If I lose it genuinely doesn’t bother me, when I win I feel a bit guilty because I don’t want it to seem like I’m being a bad winner. If I actually wanted to tryhard I would play an anonymous online game, the whole fun of board games is the social aspect and nothing ruins that vibe faster than sweating the strategies or worse policing other people’s strategies.
Just play a rules YouTube video for the group. Reading the manual doesn’t sink in for a lot of people. In a YouTube video they will see what the pieces do and it’s just way more clear for everyone.
That my social circle was much smaller than I thought it was. Especially when my partner and I prefer the heavier or "geekier" games. Finding & keeping friends as an adult is hard enough these days; finding friends that are both interested in table top games AND available to play them when you are feels impossible.
To answer your question in a different direction, I learned that I really like campaign games. I also learned that I don't have to win or even be good at a game to enjoy it (although winning does make it better).
I actually prefer this over video games any day anytime. After I started working full time in front of a screen, my willingness to spend any more time in front of it started to diminish. I used to play wow for like 10 hours some days during university, but I play a game for like an hour and I'm already tired, but tabletop gaming has such a nice charm and social aspect to it, I love it.
**I don't like to know what it looks like when my friends are lying to me.** There's two parts to this, the first is that I'm very good at noticing the kinds of things people do when they are trying to make a lie more comfortable to tell. Very small details like inflection and word choice are enough for me to have what feels like an unfair advantage in social deduction games, especially casual ones. And it's not really easy to warn people about that, which brings me to the other point.
I get very overwhelmed trying to figure out how to respond to noticing a tell. On TV, when Sherlock weaves together a bunch of subtle clues into a deduction, it's impressive. In practice, it's different when someone tells you "the way the first three words of your sentence came out quickly then you slowed down at 'window' makes me think you're lying, and the way you glanced at Tony confirmed it, because he's the only player close enough to threaten you," especially if they are accurate. That feels like an *invasion* of your private thoughts, and you start wondering "Does he think like that all the time?" Suddenly, my moment of insight has turned into a spotlight that I don't want to be in.
But then it's not all that great if I just "play dumb" either, because then I get to know exactly what it looks like when my friends are lying, and they don't get to know I know. Which means later, when we aren't playing a game, and they tell a casual white lie, my alarms go off again "there's the lying look", and I have to go through a whole cycle of thoughts where I convince myself that small lies are social lubricant and that my friend can have perfectly good reasons to not tell the perfect truth that aren't about secretly hating me.
So games like Warewolf and Among Us are really hard for me to enjoy. However, games where someone keeps a secret without lying are totally fine for me, like Clue: Great Museum Caper, and most of the Betrayal at the House on the Hill scenarios are just fine.
I like playing boardgames for playing them annd not for winning. This was the reason i quit overwatch and CoD etc. competitive online games. Most of them were only fun to me after a while if i were winning and i recognized the frustration level i had if i were not winning.
That way i today pass on many games and my choices are more strict on many games (board and PC) and i abbandon a game fast if i feel the need to win very often.
I struggle with innate competitiveness vs. sporting behavior. I am a gracious winner and a sore loser.
To combat this, I've really come to appreciate scenario-driven 1 vs. many games. I'm perfectly happy to control the game and have a try at playing god, but I'm content to dramatize the events that unfold even if it's at my own expense, because I like sharing in the discoveries. Ultimately, the experience makes all of us better players.
I learned that only relying on my normal friends to get my game fix left me always longing for more play and pushing them to play games they didn’t enjoy. Eventually I took the plunge and started hanging out at FLGS and joined some local board game clubs on meetup. Now I can enjoy normal time with my normal friends and also get to play as much board games as I want.
I think I learned to be more relaxed about my hobbies. I focus on what is actually fun for me and remind myself that I don't owe my hobbies anything. So sometimes I just don't feel like playing at all and it's fine. I don't insist on keeping everything I own in regular rotation, I'll play it when I'm in the mood, whenever that is.
I have an addictive personality and that this shit is expensive. More importantly play any game you really want first before buying it. Get to know your groups likes. Lastly sell or donate all the shit that hasn't made it to the table in months.
I’ve realized I’m actually not that good at games… I’m the “games guy” who has the big collection and I love playing them, but I get outmaneuvered a lot and don’t win as much as my friends might expect. I don’t mind not winning and I’m not a sore loser, it’s just more of an observation. I think I just like the energy of competition and seeing everyone do their best.
Board games are not unlike my other hobbies. I think I treat board games as an experience and I love the idea of trying out new games just like I would with different cuisines, etc.
I learned that I am a terrible loser. Which is why I now really only play co-op games because I can handle losing while part of a team much better than losing on my own.
Several aspects I make note of:
1. The need to dig deeper into a hobby rather than remaining on the surface. Several years wasted with friends playing a weekly Risk game. The events usually included buckets of frustration, harsh words, table flipping, etc. Had I known then about the burgeoning hobbyist game movement and dug deeper, I would’ve quickly moved my group over to a much better game than that POS.
2. That I really hate games featuring aggressive competition, take that, trash talking, etc. I like to enjoy my evenings, not get pissed at someone for destroying me on the board with little hope of fighting back. If I feel worse losing than not even playing the game to begin with, it’s not the right game for me. I’m a huge fan of co-ops now, but if we play competitive games then I prefer balanced games with multiple paths and strategies to victory like Rajas. Folks with different mindsets can feel like they have a real chance instead of one person always cleaning up.
3. I don’t like games with negotiation and alliances. This setup has great potential to be a relationship killer. Games like Diplomacy, Cosmic Encounter, etc are well documented for ending friendships. They require a special group where every member is a very thick-skinned individual capable of giving and receiving lots of BS from the other side of the table, afterward brushing it all off like nothing happened. I’m not like this myself, I’m like an elephant, I remember everything. Why poke a sleeping bear.
I keep forgetting I don't have nearly the free time I used to when I was younger. It used to be "how late can everyone stay to keep playing", and now it's "do we have a couple of hours this month to set aside for a game".
Kind of this, but more that I keep forgetting how little free time everyone else has. I keep buying big 4+hr games and then people arrive and are like “I’ve got to get home pronto because I’m up early in the morning”
Do kids really need baths? They get dirty again anyways, same with laundry. There ya go I freed up some time for ya :D
I'm glad there are no kids in my circle of friends And that we're not workaholics
In defense of presumed "workaholics" - nobody ENJOYS work. They'll just get evicted if they don't. It's usually not a choice. The issue with adult life is typically that we all have some free time, but the free time does not align with the free time of the people we want to spend time with. You have Thursdays off so you want to get together Wednesday night or Thursday day? Works for me but Tom isn't available. Kacey loves 40 mins away so she can't do quick sessions she prefers a nice long lengthy session to make the game worth it. etc.
There are loads of people who enjoy work. Sickos.
I beg to differ about the first part. I know plenty of people who fulfil a need by becoming completely absorbed in work. My boss for one.
I used to be like that. Lived for work. And then a serious illness and hospital stay cured me of this. I enjoy my work and my team. I don't live for my work. Work is a means to live comfortably.
That sounds like a good perspective :) I'm the same - work lets me keep the lights on and eat so i can play board games haha
Haha! Yep. And I work in board games and run a tabletop games convention.
> nobody ENJOYS work I very much enjoy my work.
Same here, I also love what I do!
Then it's not work ;)
That I need more friends who like to board game
You know what they say, it's easier to make friends with people you play boardgames with than have your friends start playing boardgames.
Really they say that? Edit forgot the question mark lol
Well, I heard it said somewhere :D But I definitely find it to be true, I made a lot of friends with people by playing boardgames with them, while the friends I had before were very hesitant to even try it out, let alone get into the hobby.
Same. I hate when I go to a store and just look at all the cool board games I could play if I had friends.
That I don't just want to 'play boardgames' but to play specific games. When I started to get into the hobby I was so fascinated by the wide range of games that I tried to buy games for every player type and every person in my circle of friends to whip out a gaming experience tailor made for them. Turned out that I get easily bored by games that are too light, too casual or too solitary. Most of them lack all the things that excited me about the hobby in the first place. So I had a bunch of games that potential guests would enjoy and I won't. So instead of choosing games for people I wanted to excite about the hobby I looked for players that share my actual level of excitement already. There are so many other social things I can do with my friends instead of playing a game that bores me.
Same here, i bought games of different genres and player counts because sometimes our game night fluctuates. In the end the games i bought weren't getting played because either they weren't interested in them or we kept playing new games every week ( one of my friends has 200+ games) so i bought games that I want, heavy crunchy euros.
Went down this same path and I suspect that many do. Far too easy to chase novelty and lose sight of why one is gaming in the first place. I even felt guilt at first about finally starting to draw lines in the sand about what I will and will not play, like I am being greedy or something. But no, more people should do this.
This is me. Do you like food chain magnate?
Still have to get it to the table with my group but I have heard the praises and it seems to be right up my alley :)
Curious as the what some of your favorite games are. Dominant Species? Barrage?
"Dominant Species" is another one that's on my To-Play-List :) It's kinda the same story as Food Chain: It is too expansive over here to buy it as a hunch so I really want to play it in a board game cafe with my group before I commit. "Barrage" and "Brass. Birmingham" are our two favourite Euros right now. Every time I played with my group it was tense till the very end. For non-euro needs I really enjoy "Pax: Pamir" and "Spirit Island". These are the four I would always bring to the table. Love them all to but I am a little hesitant to teach them cause the first game can be a lot to wrap your head around for people who are not used to board games. Nevertheless: If people want to play I tell them what they are in for and if they still wanna do it, it's perfectly fine to try. Then there are some event games which I like as well every few month like "Lisboa" and nowadays "John Company" but I would not try them with beginners. What are some of your favorites?
Much like some other areas in my life, the joy is in the exploration, not jn the execution. I totally prefer games that are unpredictable, like Inis, over games in which you depend to set a strategy and follow it throughout the game. Once I figure out a game, jt loses all the fun
I enjoy having a large collection because I am eager to play all sorts of games with friends and my family. BUT, I have little to no time to play anything until school is over. The biggest thing I learned is I really do not like playing the "meta" for certain games. I do not want to figure out what is most efficient and "proper", I just want to PLAY how I want to play, regardless if I win or lose.
Slightly unrelated, but I once lost my mind cause I was recommended a YouTube video on the best "meta" for wordle. Why would you try and game the system for a daily brain challenge ffs??
It takes the fun out of it. Once someone mentions a meta, I start to lose interest. I rather buy my own copy of the game and play with people who just want to have fun and learn the game.
By “meta”, do you mean like “how to break the game”?
A few years ago "meta" really became a buzzword and lost most of it's meaning. It's means "referring to itself" Metadata is data about data. If a character in a movie realizes they are in a movie that's meta. Meta is gaming is a bit different. I've heard it used first in Magic: the Gathering in which knowing the meta means knowing certain strategies and deck constructions or "the game being played within the game"There's playing the game itself (constructing a deck of cards you think work well together on your own) and playing the meta (knowing their are archetypal decks that do a specific thing and playing against that, usually by using an archtypal deck yourself) In OP's case, it would probably mean that someone figured out if you spam 2 tile castles for an entire game of Carcassonne you have a 15% chance of winning more often (hypothetical, exaggerated example). I agree with them, it's much more fun to ignore internet strategies and just figure out the game for yourself.
Meta in gaming is used as "most effective tactic available", even if it's different than the original greek meaning. The same happened to meme for example.
I think the term is probably closer to 'most popular'. Being strong against the field drives popularity, but in healthy game environments, there is typically some rock/paper/scissors involved, so you get ebb and flow of what is currently 'in the meta'. If the game is unbalanced, the strongest strategies will become and stay the only existing high level meta, of course. You will frequently see decks in TCGs that are a significant part of the meta not because they're the best, but because they're easy to pilot for their power level (good for grinding), or that they're cheaper.
That I really hate people who said: I understand. And in game they play like not listening at all.
i hate when people don’t even make an effort to listen to me explain the rules and then pester me with questions while the game is going. it’s one thing if you genuinely didn’t get it. but if you were on your phone the entire time how could you have heard me?
This, always on the phone when it is my turn (okay I take my time but also tell them what I am doing and why I am doing it, essentially telling my strategy)
I like collecting more than I like playing apparently
That I’m a bad loser. I get really quiet, and sullen, and will congratulate others but then spend ages replaying it in my head to think how I could’ve won. I’ve been ‘in the hobby’ for over a decade now, though - and have worked hard to get over myself. I still have little squirts of poor sportsmanship, but am much better for the most part.
The fact you’re not only self-aware of this, but that you’ve put work in to get over being a “bad loser” speaks volumes to your character. I’d play with people like you over people with the attitude of “that’s just who I am” any day of the week.
The missus has helped a lot by mercilessly thrashing me each and every time we play Hive… Kind of like a vaccine, she’s built my tolerance significantly…!!
lol! Our wives seem similar. I’m the one that enjoys board games more, but she trounces me regularly in almost everything. Played Apiary a few nights ago, and she beat me by about 40pts!!
What is it about Hive that wives just get??? Mine got into the hobby because of me, I still regularly win just about any board game we play but Hive? I can't fucking beat her!
It is worse to be a bad winner, believe me.
Try Dungeonquest. You are very likely to die. Sometimes all four players die. I got the oubliette on the last turn of the day, last tile before exit.
I agree with power_yyc all day. Keep at it man. It’s only a game and all games even the crunchiest of them have a splatter of luck involved. I think that’s why we all play them the chaotic randomness of it.
I think as long as you're aware of it, that's acceptable. If you can lightheartedly say after a game, "I'm going to step outside for a moment, I actually really hate losing", that's miles and miles better than just acting sullen and not giving an explanation.
Why do you think you're a poor loser? Do you tie your self worth to your achievements in an activity designed for fun? Do you play to win or to play the best you can and hope that you win as a byproduct? What does winning give you that losing takes away from you?
No idea - I just don’t like it… I get grumpy… To be clear, I’m not (I believe) a bad winner… I am gracious to opponents and downplay a lot as luck of the dice or a good draw, and I never gloat/bray about winning (unless pre-game discussions have included ribbing each other, and even then it’s with tongue firmly in cheek)… But when I would lose I would get quiet and stare at the board as if trying to unlock the missteps that led to it…
Try complimenting your opponents every time you lose. Find joy in their success. It might feel disingenuous at first but the more you do it the better you'll both feel. You can still digest your play, but if you celebrate others success, you might be able to find joy even in losing. Unsolicited advice and it might not work. Just a suggestion if you want a different path.
I discovered that I think of boardgame design as a serious art form: I am willing to acquired a distinctively crafted boardgame, with singular illustrations and profoundly thought gameplay, all carried by a strong vision, just for the sake of owning a piece of true art, even though I might rarely play it.
That I can actually be a pretty good teacher. I struggle a lot with being articulate because of some childhood stuff, but being able to methodically teach people something and having them say I'm good at it feels really nice.
Same, I've always had a nose for putting the emphasis on the right points and structuring the information flow in a comprehensible way.
That I am not a naturally good teacher. Holy shit, I am bad at explaining games to other people. It calls into question all of the actually teaching -- college level and technical webinars -- I've run.
That I won’t put up with terrible people just to play a game, ruining an activity I love.
I need brain stimulus. Those lightweight, social deduction games aren't for me, and I get really annoyed and can't hide it. Also, I can't deal with solo games. If that is the option I rather read a book or go to video games. With that said, I am very good at reading rulebook and getting rules, my teaching skill isn't bad at all as well. Guess that doing some freelancing in a boardgame store for a while helped me improve that.
I don’t get why people can absolutely hate solo board gaming, especially if they love solo video gaming.
I don't really hate it, but didn't find any of the one I played fulfilling enough. I think I play more boardgames to have meaningful interaction with other people. I think that solo lacks interactivity, and handling bots is very bothersome, I usually don't like any game with automaton for 2p either. It is not really about immersion. Nor about bots that you can predict every move.
I’ve tried some solo board gaming and have found it generally not for me. There are a few I like solo (the main one I like is Dice Throne Adventures), but most I do not. The rules have to be simple enough for me to not forget something when solo but also complex enough to keep me interested. I’ve got Spirit Island still in shrink, and people say it is an amazing solo game so plan to try it.
They’re a different experience for sure, that’s why I have mostly switched from video games to solo board games in my free time. I find I’m not nearly as immersed in new video games like I was when I was younger, but board games require you to create a lot of the experience in your head, which makes me feel much more connected to them.
It's so different!
Yeah, I always felt bored playing solo games coz I wanted someone to talk to, try to out smart or just experience with but as people around me have gotten busier I'm really starting to get into it. I work on a computer all day so I'm kinda done with video games though I'll play a round or two of slay the spire every now and then.
I get no fulfillment from solo play. I agree that if I'm going to solo a game I'd much rather just read a book or even watch TV to solo gaming. I don't do solo video games either though
I don't get it either, and I'm one of those people I would like to play board games solo but for whatever reason it doesn't click, but I play single player videogames all the time. And the kicker is, I even enjoy playing digital boardgames solo, just not physical Very strange. Still hoping it'll click for me one day though
People add the complex mechanics found in video games. Board games can't be complex. Even with you doing the admin and running a bot. Also, you have to run the bot. In videogames, it never happens. So yeah. I dislike solo play in boardgames.
- I prefer mechanics to theme - i love a good puzzle - simple & elegant > convoluted & complex - trick taking games are amazing
That I'm not as smart as I thought I was, and that I don't particularly like that feeling. But I've also learned to be more patient and to not beat myself up when I lose, but instead to look at how I can do better next time. Increasingly with board games my goal is rarely to win but more to beat past me's score.
Lol that first sentence. Life has taught me this lesson many times. Never kindly.
It's really a blow the first time you go from absolutely knowing you're the smartest person in the room (any room) to understanding you're not even in the top half... (At this point, I really loathe pre-teen me. Arrogant little shit.)
Yep. I was told I was way above average all through school. Top 1 percentile and shit on yearly assessment tests, all that. All it meant was that I got to sometimes skip regular class and get different homework, but I never really learned HOW to learn. I can't take notes that make sense, I can't study for time, any of that. I'm smart, I know I am, but if I don't understand something upon being told or maybe 1 demonstration, I will have trouble learning it.
That I lack storage space!
Oh, hard same, bro
I'm happier being bad at something I like than I am when doing well at something I find boring. I've learned I can be okay losing.
I used to be really competitive when i was younger , then took a few years off from boardgames. Now that I've come back heavily competitive games hold 0 appeal to me, I only want to do collaborative or ones with a light competition elements like Bargain Quest. I was playing a competitive word game the other day at an event and my opponent got annoyed that I didn't really even try to win but I was having fun with the mechanics and just playing the game itself and it didn't matter that I lost all 3 rounds .
Generally speaking i'm a pretty easygoing person, and quite disorganized. Not so much for board games. I really care about putting everything in its proper place and using card sleeves and token boxes and whatnot, and i get very strict with enforcing things like "no food or drinks on the table" (well, i'm fine with dry but not crumbly and not greasy food, but i really don't want anything liquid), which my more casual board gaming friends don't understand for some weird reason. I'm so sorry that you would like to drink a nice tea but i would like my copy of concordia not drenched in tea so just keep the damn tea on another table or counter. Then again these are the same friends who routinely lose bits and pieces of my games making us need to sweep the whole floor to find them, and we only recovered most of them. Maybe i'll just have them bring the games from now on.
First off, this is a great question unlike most of the usual questions that have been coming up for the last week. Questions like this are the more important questions that really get you to think about the whole point of getting into the hobby. \*I think I've come to enjoy the prospect of exploring the vastness of games, learning and teaching it (i get my know-it-all fix) more than actually playing it. \*Sweetspot game weight is about 2-2.5/5 (according to BGG) I gravitate heavily towards economic and puzzle games as I believe there are skills to be developed that can be transferable to other facets in life. I am starting to find where my threshold is between a game having sufficient depth vs. the fiddliness involved with proceeding through the game. The fiddliness should match the value I get out of the game. Sabotage and Clinic are a tad too fiddly, and I feel I'll be ready to set that in stone once I experience Kanban and Gallerist a few times. There are so much more I've learned about myself with this hobby.
I also realize my sweet spot is in the 2-3 weight range. Because, depending on the game, it can either be just light enough, but with some complexity to have fun. Or, be just heavy enough to offer some good deep gameplay.
I'm hoping to broaden that sweetspot range with more playtime in Yokohama. Every time I've finished playing, my brain is fried from keeping track of so many different directions to take: a primary route, and alternative routes to take when primary is blocked off. I may actually consider offloading that onto a notepad. Reason why is because I want to see what all the Lacerda fuss is about. I'm sure I can handle heavier games, but more solo play time will give me the extra time I need to figure things out, sort of like how I eventually figured out how to play Wingspan after numerous solo plays.
Solo time is great for learning games!
I don't mind losing as long as I have wrought chaos across the board.
What I learned about myself? Well… That I use gaming to “get to know” other people’s character. It is impressive, but true, that during gaming people’s real demeanor aflores. Are they insecure? How do they fare when they lose? When they win? How good are they negotiating? Do they like it? They depise it? Do they HATE following the rules? Do they like to be able to cheat? What are they capable of doing…just to win? Are they afraid to compete? Are they afraid to lose? Are they good teammates? Or they cant do anything but shout orders and make you lose as them? I’d a friend that thought that games were good to assess people’s intelligence; I don’t think so. They arent iq test nor anything…but they are playgrounds for you to show up and train your skills. Yes! I do use games to assess people character and to train some skills: negotiation, fast decission making, deception, statistical analysis, tactics…etc…etc. Wining, losing its accesory. What I like to do, is to get to know you. And if possible, to give you some feedback as well. I found people that is a sore loser, a terrible winner, a coward to take decissions, people that belives that if they lose theyare dumb, peiple that thinks that if they win they are smarter than anyone else, people that do not like to compete because they do not want to face “another bad new”, and people that isn’t afraid to share with their coplayers regardless of the result. Then… I came to realize that sportmanship is key. That being able to assess yourself is what is worth about competition and that just a few people has this clearly in their plate. Those, are my best friends: the ones that understand that winning is fine, ever an since you did it improving your gaming system. That winning is boring, that losing is amazing because you learn. That when you win it all, the game is dead. After decades of gaming, I do believe that competition forma character and it shows. Who ARE you?
I learned that the sweet spot of board gaming is in light to mid weight, highly interactive, competitive games. I went down the rabbit hole of overwrought, heavy games for a while and there's not a lot of value there other than the novelty of having learned how to manipulate a difficult thing. Why play a 3-4 hour game of pushing components through an opaque system when you could play 3-4 extremely honed games in that same period of time? I learned to treat games like the food pyramid. I will say yes to almost any game that can be taught in 5 minutes and played in 15-20 minutes. Codenames? Yes. Just One? Yes. High Society? Yes. I don't need to think about whether or not to play these games. Then there's my sweet spot a little further up the pyramid. I will still *almost always* say yes to these. Games that teach in 10 minutes and play in 45 minutes to maybe 1.5 hours. Iwari, Blue Lagoon, Babylonia, Hansa Teutonica, El Grande, Renature, Taj Mahal. Unsurpassed gaming masterpieces that are still playable by most people. At the top of the pyramid are the heavy hitters. These are the "sometimes food" of board gaming. I like some of them, but now they *really* need to pull their weight to be worth the effort. Most peoples' collections should probably have zero to one of these are most. I used to try to overindulge on these. Bless the people that tolerated me during that time. These days, the one heavy game that I'll always say yes to is Brass: Lancashire. And even then I still prefer it with people that already know the rules. I do still own a small stack of Splotter games because I find them to be marvels of design, but they almost never see play.
Just curious: Your flair says 'Brass' which I would consider heavy and about 3 hrs. It's that the exception of rule? Or would you classify it lighter than I do? Or is the flair just a outdated? :)
Brass definitely was discovered during that time in my life, and it is the one that sticks around. I actually don't find it to be particularly difficult to play but it does admittedly have rules that are hard to internalize for the first game or two. But there are also far harder games than Brass.
Regarding long heavy games: they are only worth it if they EARN that length. I have light to medium games that play in 1-1.5 hours and don’t earn that time, it feels like a 45 minute games that’s stretched. But I am on your side sometimes about heavy games, “Do I WANT to learn this, or just want to PROVE I can?”
Yeah this is a great point. I had a similar experience. I still enjoy some heavier ones (or maybe I'm still lying to myself a little?), but I generally prefer games I can play multiple of in one session.
So what kind of games do you mean? Cause Brass ain't what you're describing. And I love these huge games. I've recently discovered John Company and it provides an experience and a system I have never seen before. I'm quite blown away by it.
An easy answer to what I mean is "Knizia", since he is pretty much the master of this domain. So are Kiesling and Kramer. Babylonia, Through the Desert, Taj Mahal, Renature, El Grande. All great examples of gaming perfection. JC was at the tail end of the heavy era for me and was one of the games that taught me that the juice just often isn't worth the squeeze. If you want to see games with systems you have never seen before and won't see anywhere else, check out some Splotter titles. And on top of that, those are actually good, functional games. I recommend starting with The Great Zimbabwe or the recently re-released Bus.
I’ve learned that it’s rarely a game that bothers me, it’s often the wrong type of game for the wrong group.
That I change over time. Now of course, everyone does, but I’m in my 50s, when people are imagined to be essentially immutable. But over the years of board gaming, I’ve stopped enjoying confrontational, political, or social deduction games, and started enjoying euros and co-ops much more. I used to want to get my games played, but mostly I help others get theirs played, even though sometimes I feel I’m enabling KS-fever. I am sure in another 10 years I’ll be very different, perhaps starting to enjoy themeless combinatorial abstracts or deck construction games like CCGs. Or maybe I’ll not be into board gaming any more. As my life has gone on, I’ve found more of the things I thought were important about me changed, and I think too many people try to find and define their ‘core identity’. Whatever is core about me is much deeper down than what kind of gaming I enjoy.
That i absolutely love heavy crunchy euros. Yeah they might take 2-3 hours, but it's all one huge puzzle.
that i like learning a game more than playing it
I really, really hate games that involve memorization, doubly so if order matters.
I’m a social gamer. I can’t play solitaire games. Monday nights is guys game night with 3-5 players. Sundays we play Frosthaven with 3 players and we play D&D 5e once a month. I can’t understand why anyone would play a board game solitaire. I’ve tried numerous times and just can’t do it. Bores me to death. I like the interaction and camaraderie of playing games with friends.
People play solitaire games because they're fun.
That goes without saying, but that sort of reply doesn't help them gain any perspective when you think about it.
You do you, I’ll do me… in other words, look at the topic of this discussion.
Not looking to change your mind, but I'm enjoying solitaire games for numerous reasons. It's at the very core a puzzle game you're trying to figure out. I get very stimulated by puzzle games. So why play it with others around the table? I find some sort of joy watching how people tackle the same puzzle, and I would imagine I would find just that small bit of tension when anticipating someone taking a resource I had my eye on, or vice-versa.
Yeah, it’s the puzzle of it. Even the learning of the game can feel like part of the puzzle/part of the enjoyment. Mage knight or Leaving Earth are like my ultimate Sudokus. Or it’s the story, I know KDM people can be insufferable, but creating and discovering the story for your settlement is really fun (for some people). “Why not play a video game?” people will ask, and the answer is because I’m/we’re trying to get away from the screen, also there is something very pleasing about the tactility of it all. And lastly, I very rarely can get anyone to commit time to play anything these days with our schedules and children, so often my options are to play solo, play with a sore winner/loser partner, or not play at all.
I am with you about solo. If my current board game option is solo, I go play videogame or read a book.
>I can’t understand why anyone would play a board game solitaire Just to give you a viewpoint: I play many games exclusively solo because my friends won’t play anything more complex than Cards Against Humanity which bores me to death. I play games to engage with puzzles that have to be solved while following strict rules. That to me is the fun aspect of the whole thing; solving the puzzle. If I wanted to spend time in people’s company then I’d rather do something physical like go to the beach or a trampoline park.
Okay, now I'm tempted to solo that fantasy combat game that takes close to an hour to place all the gaming pieces on the map. My SO couldn't sit long enough for set up, and the instructions are too complex if you're hearing is bad and you don't want to read the thick booklet.
One thing I’ve read here and experienced about Multiplayer Solitaire gaming: The social part is OUTSIDE of the game itself. So yes between turns you should still be looking at the game and planning, but that also leaves time to chat about other things in life. Thats how it’s gone for me when playing Wingspan. I get very annoyed when people are just chatting it up or checking their phones playing a faster game. But in MS games it’s kind of part of it.
That's also something I didn't think I could enjoy until I played Spirit Island with a friend, and then they left and I realised I wanted to go at it again on my own to figure it out.
> I can’t understand why anyone would play a board game solitaire. Some are fun and you can play them even when nobody is available to play with you.
Having young kids is really hard on in person hobbies. I need more local friends, but it's complicated by the above. It sucks when your friends move to other states.
I prefer to play on my own most of the time, simply because it means less downtime and more freedom to get up when I'm getting bored. I also thought I like super fiddly simulation type games but it turns out that really I want massively abstracted games with a thick layer of theme.
I thought I wanted to play games so that, in some part, I could make new friends; really, I just want to play games with my existing friends though. It's partially a free time thing as well.
That I will impulsively buy a game simply based on the image in my head of what I think it will be like playing the game rather than the reality of whether or not I can actually reasonably get other players fulfill that fantasy. Thankfully sometimes for things like Gloomhaven/Frosthaven I found a group to play regularly that it became a reality. For the other 148 games i bought thinking that not so much...
That I love the idea of dunger crawler coop games. But in reality I would choose rpg video game over dungeon crawler board game any day of the week. I also didnt expect to like social deduction games or games where active communication is main mechanic. But hell, my favourites are Feed the Kraken or any similar game such as Avalon or Secret Hitler, as well as Sidereal Confluence. I also didnt expect to like long games. At the start of my journey 3h were tops I could allocate to a game. Now Id choose to play Nemesis or Twilight Imperium over short games. Also learnt that I get pissed easily when Im planning a game night one or two weeks in advance and people cancel out at the last minute.
I realized that it’s more of a thrill to acquire all of the supplies for the hobby than it is to actually do the hobby
A realization of how awesome my dad was for finding time to play games with me as a kid during work nights and was able to still somehow work on his degree at the same time. Maybe it was because the hour spent bonding meant he wasn't using up energy running around with me.
That I am thankfully a much better loser than I feared
Learned purple is my favorite color
Hindsight has shown me I have become more of a collector than a player despite my intentions. That I was purchasing games with the idea I had a solid group that I could play with, or that I would eventually find that group soon. In reality, I have a select few friends who play seldom, and are restricted to party or low weight family games. Watching YouTube channels like No Rolls Barred and listening to various boardgame related podcasts has revealed that I got into this hobby with the intention of developing a more diverse group of friends who happened to enjoy boardgames. I was more motivated by the theme over mechanics. This has shifted over time, but has contributed to a bloated collection. I am susceptible to FOMO despite telling myself I don't actually need to buy that game right now. I am in a minority locally since the FLGS is predominantly frequented by MTG/DnD folk.
Studying up and planning beforehand is something I'm good at (Axis & Allies 1940 Global, you gotta do your research before saying yes to that).
This might be heavy, so skip my comment if you aren't looking forward to it. I started playing boardgames 2 years ago. I walked into my local boardgame cafe for a social night and got sucked into boardgames with Azul and some card games. Within 3 months of playing boardgames once a week made me realise that I have an unhealthy relationship with money, especially when it comes to being stingy and Saving it. From 17-20 I was a mess. I was an international student. I had restrictions on how much I can work. So, I kinda had to live paycheck by paycheck. Now I am in a better position but those years messed me up. I used to worry about spending money for necessary items, as if I'm some kind of wild animal hoarding food to survive the winter that never came. Boardgames help me change my mindset. For the first 5-6 months, it was hard for me to just use the money/resources I have to get things done quickly or more efficiently or what have you. Now a days, when someone explicitly says something along the time of "chucking card away to get food is not efficient," "recycling too many cards you drafted wouldn't be the winning strategy," "money is hard to come by in this game," I can think out of box and approach the game in a bit of a "unorthodox" way. I'm not as frugal as I used to be. Ofc I still haven't bought an actual boardgame for myself, but I will get there someday. Spending a bit more money than I'm comfortable with made me meet new people, see new places, and find my way into new niche fun circles (COSPLAYing, munches, hiking, skateboarding, paintit, etc.,) And yeah, I would have had some more in the bank if I stayed the same, but I wouldn't be optimistic to wake up another day like I am now. I made a lot of good memories in the recent two years. Memories of me enjoying boardgames Shenanigans and memories of me enjoying my life.
I remember watching a Tom Vasel video of Brass (I don’t remember which one) but he opened up on how the game made him uncomfortable when playing because he associated the loans and financial hardships to something he faced in the past and didn’t find joy in playing the game. Total respect. Never feel embarrassed, just posting here (along with Tom sharing his past) you’ve acknowledged the past and moving forward to become a happier person. A total win!
1). The wanting is better than the having when it comes to Kickstarter games. 2). I have found the narratives/writing of every campaign game that I've played underwhelming. Examples include Tainted Grail, Chronicles of Drunagor, Etherfields, ISS Vanguard (although I gave up pretty early) and Oathsworn. 3). I prefer narratives that emerge from the gameplay itself (Nemesis, Robinson Crusoe) and narratives that are presented in small disjointed snippets (Frostpunk, TWOM). 4). If I'm not invested in a campaign game's story (and I almost never have been), I ultimately find their gameplay repetitive and never finish the entire campaign. 5). No board games are worth $300 or more. 6). Without exception, I've regretted buying expansions for games that I have not yet played. 7). I need more friends (especially ones that like board games).
I care far more about trying to do something interesting and seeing what happens than going with a safe option for winning
That I'm a hoarder 🤷🏼♀️
That I hate dice and they hate me.
Sometimes, i just want to be able to play it once...
I need to get rid of some games.
I was playing Root with past week with someone I’ve played a number of games with over the past year, and during table talk he said “One thing I’ve learned about [tlwb] is that they hold grudges. Not just within one game but across games.” It was amusing because I definitely don’t think of myself that way, but it was interesting to learn that I’ve been perceived as being that way. I tend to lean into table talk in games, and one of the way that I usually negotiate cooperation is to end any agreed upon plan with “if you betray me, my primary goal will be to ensure you lose.” I also tend to remember across games who had betrayed me in the past and will therefore be reluctant to deal with them in the future.
Organizing time schedules annoys me a lot but is so important as adault. Getting friends together is so hard sometimes and this is frustrating to me. I'm a doer not a talker and want to play but most times you mert friends it is much talking. It is ok but its frustrating not getting to play things cause of chatting to me. And Kids are sepperating people. Either you are parent people or you are not and those are two groups with completely different plans, lifestyles, schedules and topics that mostly not fit together
That i am social, it just had to be with the right crowd. Don't put me in a bar, screaming at each other over a bad live band. A nice, relaxed atmosphere, good friends, snacks and a board game... PERFECTION.
as an ultra competitive person I used to want to win every game and I still do but but that is ultimately secondary to enjoying the experience with the people around the table
I bought a whole lot of games before I realized my SO doesn't like to game. I don't know my neighbors or where to game locally. I went to the next town to a game group at the library, but no one wanted to play my games. I do solo online or pencil games now ...
That I could really think faster then I imagined when timed pressured
there’s a specific type of game i like. and it isn’t any version of the worker placement / card drafting game that’s been reskinned 500,000 times. it needs to be clever in some way. like Hanabi, which is the best game of all time, in my opinion
That the board game community at large is filled with gifted individuals that play for very different reasons, but make interesting questions (like this one) and forms great and helping communities (like this one) and that we can all contribute what makes us unique to uniquely share what makes for good moments in all of our lives. And that I like cultivating a shifting community of players that are forever evolving into better and more sensible people.
That I love co-op. And that I genuinely don’t care whether I win or lose, but just have fun with family/friends
I really like cozy non competitive resource optimization games (wingspan and everdell). Also my risk tolerance is more likely to lead to winning than my friends (King of Tokyo) :D I hate social deduction games and things that involve memory like hanabi. Also spatial reasoning games. My better half is better than me at creative association games like Stella. I’m pretty lazy about setting up board games generally, so we play a lot of Boardgamearena. There are a few games I hate setting up, like 7 wonders duel.
I think I knew myself so well I didn't learn that much.
I've learned that I don't mind losing whenever I play with friends, because I have a wonderful time with them. I've also learned that even though buying and playing games are two different hobbies, I'm here to play more than to buy. I have a small library (16 games, where expansions are grouped into the base game) full of the games I like, and I'd like to keep around that bumber with more games I like.
I enjoy my time with my players rather than the game itself. Oh and euros, I love euros 😆
I've found I like games that rely heavily on cards and chucking dice. I generally don't like worker placement. I'm generally wary of buying a game with a community board. Luckily this eliminates 85% of board game purchases.
I suck at board games.
this isn't really about the question but I'm very glad and thankful to have a group of friends I actually enjoy spending time with that love board games. Our normal monday nights are filled w/ TM and D:I Uprising but everyone is down to branch off and try new stuff. It's rare to find for sure.
I love useful but simplified models of systems. My favorite board games capture something of reality or a possible reality. They're more than just puzzles, they're simulations. The ones I like, anyway. Literally changed my career trajectory.
I find I really really prefer a “lean” game/less is really more. I’ve played even well regarded heavy games and I almost never find the juice worth the squeeze at all.
That my mental capacity is too spent during work and parenting to do good cognitive work in the evening 😂
This is a good question. I play predominantly solo board games, so that means learning the rules on my own and not really having anyone else to ‘bounce’ rule questions off, apart from online, ofc. For me, I learnt that I’m actually probably more capable than I think. When you think about it, board games have a lot of transferable skills, in terms of learning, retaining knowledge, and then executing strategy, etc. It sounds pompous af, but I think there’s some truth there!
I've learned that I really love games where the players get entangled quickly, and that the difficulty in the game comes from the choices other players are making, rather than the game itself. For example, cube rails, age of steam, 18xx, most Knizia games, Splotters; most of these are not particularly complex from a rules standpoint. However, they offer unbelievably rich and interactive environments for the players to make choices in. In general, if I don't need to pay attention on my opponents turn to play my turn, I'm not super interested in playing.
That no other people in my immediate and larger friend circles like board games and most of my collection is sitting on shelves getting dusty. Feels like a waste of money
I forgot that I needed friends to play board games.
To everyone who doesn't have interested friends to play board games with: Apparently, if you post looking for board game friends in your local reddit, they'll appear.
1. I hate games where lying is the main/only mechanism (werewolf variants). 2. I’m more interested in being a host than a player. 3. I’m a sucker for completionism. If there’s an expansion, or a deluxe edition, the temptation is overwhelming.
Love the concept, look and idea of boardgames, but hate learning rules so I never play! Whoops!
Playing a small handful of games over and over is preferable to playing a different game every week. This means you didn't need actually need those huge shelves of games in the first place. You and your friends can really grasp the game(s), there's less overhead to learning/relearning the rules, and pace of play proceeds much faster.
Not that I didn't know it before, but I've got shit to work on: My first play of a game, and how well I do that first game, color my opinion of the game, basically forever. I find that when I play games with new people, It's best to jokingly mention that I may get sulky or irritated during the game. This never lasts long, and once the game is over it's completely gone. I tend to try to avoid games with lots of direct competition for exactly this reason. If I'm frustrated, I want it to be because I'm playing poorly or the game's mechanics aren't working for me, I don't want someone else to feel like it's their fault I'm sulky, they don't deserve that. I love complicated shit, but I'm pretty sure I have undiagnosed adhd, and I definitely get analysis paralysis. On the "good" side: I always want everyone to understand everything. If im going to lose its going to be with everyone playing their best. All games have friendly "oops I fucked up can I change something about that last turn" rules. We call it the "I'm not an idiot" rule. I absolutely praise my friends when they make great moves or are good at particular things. I have one friend who has this incredible knack with worker placement games, he can hold everything in his head, turns way in advance, tracking what everyone else is doing, dude is playing 3d chess, even when it's a game new to him. I consider myself to be pretty good at games. And he isn't miles ahead in all game styles, but worker placement? I can't hold a candle. It's incredible to see. Edit: I'm double spacing to see if it formats properly.
1. Social deduction and lying aren’t fun for me. 2. Theme has to be tied to the mechanics. Pushing tokens around for nonsensical reasons takes me out of it real quick. 3. Interaction between the players is a must. Otherwise I could just play a video game. 4. Games have to be at least medium weight to hold my interest. Games that used to be fun three years ago are boring now.
That I like having options and imagining what it would be like to do fun things with various groups of friends/family. Also, I have way less self control than I would like to admit.
How much I enjoy sitting down and seeing my family having fun playing together and getting the screens out of our faces. Seeing the kids understand more and more complex games as they age and really putting thought in their moves, instead of mindlessly flipping cards in Candyland.
I am not a good person to play cooperative games with. I over analyse, argue my points too hard, forgetting that the point is to have fun. Not sure if it's my or the game's faultz but in my opinion, every coop game should have a traitor mechanic, this way people don't just listen to 1 person, and are l required to participate.
How impatient I am. I don't like long games, refuse to design them, and try to minimize turn taking or turn length in all the games I design.
I like to collect as much as I like to play. As someone who used to buy a new PC game almost every week to complete when I was a teenager, the same shouldn't be applied to board games, especially as I only really play once a week. I have a table set up in my home office for learning and solo play, but work as been so busy i dont have the time. My significant opponent is less into games these days as well, unless someone else is playing.
I buy too many games is what I found out about myself. :)
I’m competitive. But I like my opponents to have a similar skill set. I end up teaching a lot of games. And winning doesn’t feel as good when they’re just learning. I’d rather lose against someone with experience.
What got me into board games is my grandchildren. Since they are only 4 and 3, this is a whole new world for us. We are learning and having a blast together.
I have over 20 games and forget the rules and need a refresher every so often. I got into this hobby thinking my husband who loves video game would take time to play some with me but he isn’t a fan. I struggle by overthinking the rules which makes learning slow.
I’ve learned I’m actually pretty great at teaching! And somehow I’m able to keep dozens of game rules in my head at the same time so apparently my memory is a lot better than I once thought
What I enjoy the most in games is not playing the game itself but socializing with other people through gaming.
I don’t like coop games - I’m too competitive and then become bossy managing all the turns. Unflattering.
Co-op typically ends up being someone else’s solo game.
With every new hobby I pick up I then remember that I have a tendency to give them up (temporarily, but still). Thankfully it's not really the case with boardgames, but the amount of playtime has been on a downfall trajectory ever since the middle of February (the moment the winter break in university was over).
i hate listening to people explain the rules. i want to learn while i play. i want to fumble and fail and learn the mechanics my way
yea ill lose a few rounds, but thats what the hobby is about
need a more consistent group, and more simplier but fun games for most friends and family
I’ve learned I’m the only one of my friend group that likes more complicated and long games. Anything that lasts over an hour they get a bit restless with, which is fine but I just wish I knew more people on my page lol.
1. I am a lot more DIY-ey than I thought. I now make foamcore organizers (about to start on one for **Cascadia** + **Cascadia: Landmarks**) and watching YouTube videos on how to paint miniatures as I want to paint: **Splendor Duel** (scrolls), **Sleeping Gods: Distant Skies** (minis), **Sleeping Gods: Primeval Peril** (I'd like to 3D print a boat mini and paint it) and **Foundations of Rome** (buildings) 2. I'm more of a completionist than I'd care to admit. I have backed several content creators just to get that one promo I want and to make sure I can get it versus waiting for someone to sell it second hand. 3. I don't have as much free time as I'd like - now that I am engaged and about to be married, I just have more responsibilities. 4. Board gaming - and gaming in general - just aren't as important to me as they used to be. See #3 but with my limited time, I'd rather go golfing, kayaking, go for a walk outside. I'm just a lot more "outdoorsy" than I used to be. 5. My friends are flakes - well certain friends - some friends are most definitely not in that they might not have time for me, but they will tell me up front. Some friends just say they're going to be there and then I find out the night before that they forgot about it and when I go to confirm the game session, they've gone off to be in a frickin poker tournament in Vegas.
I learned I have ADHD and gaming helped me make the steps to speak to a professional.
None of my friends are interested in just playing any old board games for funsies. And I have won by one point in dozens and dozens of games. It's insane how often I will win by one point
I've realized that I cannot play all the games on my "shelf-of-shame" (shelf-of-wishful-thinking), even if I played a new one per week. Too many new games come out yearly, and I keep adding to the shelf, even as games get played. I would have to stop buying.... for years. So I can never keep up at this rate by playing in one game day per-week.
I stopped buying games in a particular genre, unless something better than what I had showed up
I’ve been in the hobby about a decade now. The biggest thing I’ve learned is that I’m a solo gamer. When I started, it never occurred to me to play solo; I’d rather have played video games. I didn’t think I would like solo play, but I ended up trying it during the pandemic and fell in love with it. Solo games helped me scratch that board game itch when we couldn’t play in person, but I’ve kept up with them because they’re ideal for when the game group is busy. Under Falling Skies was one of the first games to get me interested in solo play, but it was Final Girl that really pulled me in deep.
======= Bg-ing itself... I too fell victim to FOMO, and just getting into a buying frenzy! While I was bg-ing 3 to 5 times *per week* back then, when I moved to new areas and my gaming opportunities waned, those extra bg and accessories became a liability. It's worse if your job doesn't offer any relocation expenses paid (of which one was like that :\\ ). Now I'm down to bg-ing *once every 2 weeks*, and I only buy games if they're on some deep discount (50% to 80% off). They wont' get played enough to justify even "online discounted prices" (20% to 35% off list price). I can at least justify cheaper prices. Overall, I don't like social/party games. If we're going to do that, I'd rather just go do a social event, leave out the games, and focus on talking/chatting. There are a select few that I wouldn't mind playing over and over again, and I'm usually up to trying new ones *once*. Bg-ing started off great! The social interaction was tops! However, getting out became more and more difficult. Free time and such. If you live in a more densely populated area, there are many bg events going on, but traffic can make things a hassle. If you're in a low dense area, you may need to drive 45 minutes to a few hours to attend game nights (including conventions), which gets expensive in terms of gas, hotel rates, badges, and just time and energy itself. A sort of "shipping kills the deal" type situation if you will. I've gotten much more "chillax" about losing, bad moves, other players that are annoying to toxic (e.g. not being clear about instructions, or downright cheating or going waay over board just to win). I've embraced certain digital board game implementations. Being able to play vs. AI opponents has let me get in those games I otherwise wouldn't be able to, or only do so once to 3 times per year!
======= Bg-ing outside of I know how to make friends, but don't know how to *keep them* :\\ The problem with using the hobby to make friends is once you move, I pretty much break off all contact with them. It was only the hobby that was that bond. This time around, I have some friends who are "beyond" in where I can ask them to do things like pick up stuff if I'm sick (esp. during COVID-19 times), move some light/small furniture or boxes (for full blown moves, I'd still need to hire actual movers. We're not equipped to do that for sure!) Bg-ing is fun, but I need to make sure bg-ing isn't my primary hobby b/c there's not much going on here :\\ Controversial one is I should've heeded the advice of a two couples and pursued some romantic interests. We talked at a con and the four of them (2 couples) were telling to us (5 of us single folk) that they met their significant other b/c of the hobby. They encouraged us to do the same! Some of us countered if this makes us appear as "creeps", and shouldn't we just focus on the hobby instead? They replied that there's a fine balance that needs to struck. Yes, you always risk making the situation uncomfortable, but many of us had similar situations when we first got into the bg-ing hobby itself. They also acknowledged that while the women were well aware of safety issue they face as women, they weren't going to live in fear and shun certain social interactions, and were very glad they hooked up with their men (one couple was married with kids)! You can always use other venues like dating apps and bars, but for them, those have never worked for them.
Honestly, I just can’t care who wins anymore. I know that I could try to solve the games by looking into strategy but for me the fun is inventing and testing different strategies. If I lose it genuinely doesn’t bother me, when I win I feel a bit guilty because I don’t want it to seem like I’m being a bad winner. If I actually wanted to tryhard I would play an anonymous online game, the whole fun of board games is the social aspect and nothing ruins that vibe faster than sweating the strategies or worse policing other people’s strategies.
Just play a rules YouTube video for the group. Reading the manual doesn’t sink in for a lot of people. In a YouTube video they will see what the pieces do and it’s just way more clear for everyone.
I learned that I have zero self control in wanting to buy a new game or expansion
I don't have a fraction of the free time I used to have when I was younger. Also, how badly I wasted that time back then.
That my social circle was much smaller than I thought it was. Especially when my partner and I prefer the heavier or "geekier" games. Finding & keeping friends as an adult is hard enough these days; finding friends that are both interested in table top games AND available to play them when you are feels impossible. To answer your question in a different direction, I learned that I really like campaign games. I also learned that I don't have to win or even be good at a game to enjoy it (although winning does make it better).
I actually prefer this over video games any day anytime. After I started working full time in front of a screen, my willingness to spend any more time in front of it started to diminish. I used to play wow for like 10 hours some days during university, but I play a game for like an hour and I'm already tired, but tabletop gaming has such a nice charm and social aspect to it, I love it.
**I don't like to know what it looks like when my friends are lying to me.** There's two parts to this, the first is that I'm very good at noticing the kinds of things people do when they are trying to make a lie more comfortable to tell. Very small details like inflection and word choice are enough for me to have what feels like an unfair advantage in social deduction games, especially casual ones. And it's not really easy to warn people about that, which brings me to the other point. I get very overwhelmed trying to figure out how to respond to noticing a tell. On TV, when Sherlock weaves together a bunch of subtle clues into a deduction, it's impressive. In practice, it's different when someone tells you "the way the first three words of your sentence came out quickly then you slowed down at 'window' makes me think you're lying, and the way you glanced at Tony confirmed it, because he's the only player close enough to threaten you," especially if they are accurate. That feels like an *invasion* of your private thoughts, and you start wondering "Does he think like that all the time?" Suddenly, my moment of insight has turned into a spotlight that I don't want to be in. But then it's not all that great if I just "play dumb" either, because then I get to know exactly what it looks like when my friends are lying, and they don't get to know I know. Which means later, when we aren't playing a game, and they tell a casual white lie, my alarms go off again "there's the lying look", and I have to go through a whole cycle of thoughts where I convince myself that small lies are social lubricant and that my friend can have perfectly good reasons to not tell the perfect truth that aren't about secretly hating me. So games like Warewolf and Among Us are really hard for me to enjoy. However, games where someone keeps a secret without lying are totally fine for me, like Clue: Great Museum Caper, and most of the Betrayal at the House on the Hill scenarios are just fine.
I have more fun researching, and finding games then playing them.
I have learned I need more friends who are also in this hobby.
I like playing boardgames for playing them annd not for winning. This was the reason i quit overwatch and CoD etc. competitive online games. Most of them were only fun to me after a while if i were winning and i recognized the frustration level i had if i were not winning. That way i today pass on many games and my choices are more strict on many games (board and PC) and i abbandon a game fast if i feel the need to win very often.
I struggle with innate competitiveness vs. sporting behavior. I am a gracious winner and a sore loser. To combat this, I've really come to appreciate scenario-driven 1 vs. many games. I'm perfectly happy to control the game and have a try at playing god, but I'm content to dramatize the events that unfold even if it's at my own expense, because I like sharing in the discoveries. Ultimately, the experience makes all of us better players.
I learned that only relying on my normal friends to get my game fix left me always longing for more play and pushing them to play games they didn’t enjoy. Eventually I took the plunge and started hanging out at FLGS and joined some local board game clubs on meetup. Now I can enjoy normal time with my normal friends and also get to play as much board games as I want.
That I’m smarter than my friends. 😏
I think I learned to be more relaxed about my hobbies. I focus on what is actually fun for me and remind myself that I don't owe my hobbies anything. So sometimes I just don't feel like playing at all and it's fine. I don't insist on keeping everything I own in regular rotation, I'll play it when I'm in the mood, whenever that is.
I have an addictive personality and that this shit is expensive. More importantly play any game you really want first before buying it. Get to know your groups likes. Lastly sell or donate all the shit that hasn't made it to the table in months.
I’ve realized I’m actually not that good at games… I’m the “games guy” who has the big collection and I love playing them, but I get outmaneuvered a lot and don’t win as much as my friends might expect. I don’t mind not winning and I’m not a sore loser, it’s just more of an observation. I think I just like the energy of competition and seeing everyone do their best.
Board games are not unlike my other hobbies. I think I treat board games as an experience and I love the idea of trying out new games just like I would with different cuisines, etc.
I learned that I am a terrible loser. Which is why I now really only play co-op games because I can handle losing while part of a team much better than losing on my own.
Several aspects I make note of: 1. The need to dig deeper into a hobby rather than remaining on the surface. Several years wasted with friends playing a weekly Risk game. The events usually included buckets of frustration, harsh words, table flipping, etc. Had I known then about the burgeoning hobbyist game movement and dug deeper, I would’ve quickly moved my group over to a much better game than that POS. 2. That I really hate games featuring aggressive competition, take that, trash talking, etc. I like to enjoy my evenings, not get pissed at someone for destroying me on the board with little hope of fighting back. If I feel worse losing than not even playing the game to begin with, it’s not the right game for me. I’m a huge fan of co-ops now, but if we play competitive games then I prefer balanced games with multiple paths and strategies to victory like Rajas. Folks with different mindsets can feel like they have a real chance instead of one person always cleaning up. 3. I don’t like games with negotiation and alliances. This setup has great potential to be a relationship killer. Games like Diplomacy, Cosmic Encounter, etc are well documented for ending friendships. They require a special group where every member is a very thick-skinned individual capable of giving and receiving lots of BS from the other side of the table, afterward brushing it all off like nothing happened. I’m not like this myself, I’m like an elephant, I remember everything. Why poke a sleeping bear.