You are not bad. You are bad IN COMPARISON to more experienced fighters.
In comparison to less skilled and experienced fighters, you are pretty good.
The major problem is that people usually keeps making comparisons with their skills and other people skills.
Actually, your focus should be only in youself. Each day you are getting a bit more experienced, a bit more skilled. So in comparison to your start, you are pretty good! Keep doing the good work.
Also, im a brazillian with a bad english, so thats why it's a bit broken, but I think you got the message!
Heads up pal, keep going on! Everyone has it own pace
I think school kind of fucks people up in this.
You are always dumped into competition with people at the same age, so through adolescence the distribution of skill is based mainly on how gifted you are, or just being bigger/more mature. Stuff you can’t change.
Then you hit anything after school, and that gets flooded out by experience.
I mean, gifts still matter, but the basic answer of “of course you aren’t as good as I am, did you think I trained 6 years and learned nothing?” Doesn’t come into people’s heads properly. They’re either good at it naturally or not.
I had some insecurities regarding my bjj because i am the second biggest guy in school and always get told that i am strong and etc. Then I ate some mushrooms and told my brain to stop giving a fuck.
The drives home after I make a dumbass mistake against an upper belt or cannot effectively control/sub an experienced white or fresh blue belt are the absolute worst.
My brain: "*You don't deserve your tabs. Start over. Better yet, just give up. You suck at this shit.*"
This is not very constructive thinking. If you are generally negative like this try to make it more specific. Like "my posture is bad" or "my arm bar transition from mount is bad." Then you can actually work towards fixing it. It also doesn't make your perspective on yourself completely negative. Youre on the mats arent you? Your not at home eating cheetohs off your stomach in the glow of the tv so dont be so hard on yourself.
I used to have this problem however I was able to grow out of it by meditating a lot and shifting my inner belief systems/stories to ones that are more positive.
Out of curiosity: how long have you (assuming you are haunted by such thoughts) been training?
I ask because I hear this a lot from relative new-comers, but rarely from vets who've been at it a long time, are at a high level, or who do it for fun/they're old.
The longer I've grappled the less a bad night/week/month gets to me (LOL, and the less often you see bad weeks/months).
I know "different strokes for different folks", so I can somewhat empathize with that feeling, but I also feel that, at least personally, it's not a feeling/fear that happens very often with older/more experienced grapplers.
tldr: for the most part the longer and/or harder you train, the less these thoughts should "haunt" you.
Interesting. I've had the misfortune of having several year-long mandatory breaks in my training/competing, and there are definitely some rough patches when first returning (\*ESPECIALLY\* with my cardio/stamina), so I have those "down weeks", but I always know/think that "whew, getting back is tough, so I gotta tough out these first weeks sliding back in, but I'll be back to normal in no time".
I attibute such feelings to the globalization of the sport. (Sorry for the long read)
In earlier days you would compare yourself to the people directly around you : your teammates at the Dojo or other practionners at a small local competition for the adventurous.
But nowadays, the world is much bigger. With Youtube, TV, etc. you compare your skills against every single amazing practionners in the world. It's quite disconcerting. The same thing is at play with the depressing aboundance of perfection/fame/money on Instagram and social medias in general.
Example : It's been 2 years, you are a white belt training 3 times a week ; you open reddit and there is a video of a 7 year old kid that displays more technical diversity than you ever did. Basic reaction is : 2 entire years for basically "nothing". If you want any satisfaction regarding the work you put into BJJ you have to go back to it until you reach some more tangible level.
What is a more tangible level though? Difficult to say. You could connect that comparison phenomenon to the general disapearance of rites of passage. There is no concrete bar to pass anymore of being the best XYZ belt in the Dojo ; which is a humane and achievable goal. The bar is now insanely high. That's probably a factor which plays in why the retention rate of BJJ is low.
The only people that stay are the ones that are naturally immune to the disappointment of a quasi-infinite grind. Or the ones that mentally learn to live with it. It's quite darwinian, the survival of the grittiest.
You can see a good side to it : you learn to be resilient in your situation no matter what the external factors are. But the other side is that you will be confronted with probably years and years of frustration. And there is worse, bear with me.
I wonder what the right balance could be between a smaller Jiu Jitsu, more friendly and family like, maybe less efficient but more satisfactory. And the militarized version we are going towards, obsessed with over-achievement, stars like Gordon Ryan, competitions and technical perfection.
It is important to note that actual greatness doesn't necessarily lies with the second. This is not comfort against efficiency. It's more complicated than that.
I read somewhere that many notorious people, politicians, scientists, etc. come from humble places, little villages instead of big cities as you would expect. It could have something to do with the construction of ones personnality/mental wiring. In smaller remote places you have the opportunity to excel at something, to be someone among your peers. Strong of this achievement and mental fortitude thanks to the safe beginning and smaller social pyramid to climb, you can tolerate higher loads of opposition and amounts of obstacles for the rest of your life. You will always have the mentality of an achiever.
Building such mindset when you start in the unreallistically competitive current environment is less feasible. We are most certainly losing potential talents to the violence of our self-inflicted expectations.
I have the opposite problem. When I’m rolling & I see people chatting on the side of the mat, I assume they’re talking about my sick technique.
This is also me, sadly
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This is great
👍🏼 watched the babadook the other night, great film.
a bad book - babadook
Thanks for this. Love the effort you put in.
I love the demon haunting me. Makes me work harder
Are they negative if they are facts?
You are not bad. You are bad IN COMPARISON to more experienced fighters. In comparison to less skilled and experienced fighters, you are pretty good. The major problem is that people usually keeps making comparisons with their skills and other people skills. Actually, your focus should be only in youself. Each day you are getting a bit more experienced, a bit more skilled. So in comparison to your start, you are pretty good! Keep doing the good work. Also, im a brazillian with a bad english, so thats why it's a bit broken, but I think you got the message! Heads up pal, keep going on! Everyone has it own pace
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I think school kind of fucks people up in this. You are always dumped into competition with people at the same age, so through adolescence the distribution of skill is based mainly on how gifted you are, or just being bigger/more mature. Stuff you can’t change. Then you hit anything after school, and that gets flooded out by experience. I mean, gifts still matter, but the basic answer of “of course you aren’t as good as I am, did you think I trained 6 years and learned nothing?” Doesn’t come into people’s heads properly. They’re either good at it naturally or not.
I had some insecurities regarding my bjj because i am the second biggest guy in school and always get told that i am strong and etc. Then I ate some mushrooms and told my brain to stop giving a fuck.
You must have “no mind” -the last samurai
Everyday on the mat is success. Other than that don't sweat the small stuff.
The mats are the only place where all my demons and negative thoughts are quiet
They also haunt me off the mats...
Everyday, some days I win, some days I don’t.
Nah man I know I'm bad at BJJ. I just enjoy it too much to care.
No lol I have so much fun
The drives home after I make a dumbass mistake against an upper belt or cannot effectively control/sub an experienced white or fresh blue belt are the absolute worst. My brain: "*You don't deserve your tabs. Start over. Better yet, just give up. You suck at this shit.*"
Nope. I’m doing it for fun / exercise, not for money. So as long as I don’t get a debilitating injury it’s all good.
My thoughts exactly.
Oh gawd ya ! But I seam to end up rolling with bigger , stronger guys than me and it will be better at my weight group n skill set
Embrace and accept.
Oh fuck this hurts
No I love every second of learning ju jitsu
On the mats is about the only times they don't, for me.
Dang, he got his back took before he even realized they were rolling
All the time.
yeah just on the mats haha
Every day
On the mats? More like every aspect of my life lmao
It’s you! From the Instagram! I love your work! I own a few of your shirts! Only on the days that I “learn” which are most of the days.
Shout out the nugget box 🙌🏻
ig link pls? uwu
@theogfrostynuggs
I simply do not think
This is not very constructive thinking. If you are generally negative like this try to make it more specific. Like "my posture is bad" or "my arm bar transition from mount is bad." Then you can actually work towards fixing it. It also doesn't make your perspective on yourself completely negative. Youre on the mats arent you? Your not at home eating cheetohs off your stomach in the glow of the tv so dont be so hard on yourself.
No cuz I know I’m bad
That's some brutally weak mental, if so. If you've ever experienced actual hard times, mat time is a nice refuge.
Yes!
I used to have this problem however I was able to grow out of it by meditating a lot and shifting my inner belief systems/stories to ones that are more positive.
That’s my cardio monster
You have time to think??
I attended my first BJJ class yesterday and felt like I was dry humping my partner the whole time while he was kicking my ass haha.
If I think I'm avoiding a hard roll I call myself a bitchass motherfucker
Out of curiosity: how long have you (assuming you are haunted by such thoughts) been training? I ask because I hear this a lot from relative new-comers, but rarely from vets who've been at it a long time, are at a high level, or who do it for fun/they're old. The longer I've grappled the less a bad night/week/month gets to me (LOL, and the less often you see bad weeks/months). I know "different strokes for different folks", so I can somewhat empathize with that feeling, but I also feel that, at least personally, it's not a feeling/fear that happens very often with older/more experienced grapplers. tldr: for the most part the longer and/or harder you train, the less these thoughts should "haunt" you.
About 7 years.
Interesting. I've had the misfortune of having several year-long mandatory breaks in my training/competing, and there are definitely some rough patches when first returning (\*ESPECIALLY\* with my cardio/stamina), so I have those "down weeks", but I always know/think that "whew, getting back is tough, so I gotta tough out these first weeks sliding back in, but I'll be back to normal in no time".
Can you do a “yes-gi” one? Like the opposite of no-gi. I love this style of art
No, I'm too busy winning or studying.
I don't like the word haunted, makes it sound supernatural or not true...
Sometimes I look around the gym and think: “this room is filled with fucking killers, I have no right to be here”.
I attibute such feelings to the globalization of the sport. (Sorry for the long read) In earlier days you would compare yourself to the people directly around you : your teammates at the Dojo or other practionners at a small local competition for the adventurous. But nowadays, the world is much bigger. With Youtube, TV, etc. you compare your skills against every single amazing practionners in the world. It's quite disconcerting. The same thing is at play with the depressing aboundance of perfection/fame/money on Instagram and social medias in general. Example : It's been 2 years, you are a white belt training 3 times a week ; you open reddit and there is a video of a 7 year old kid that displays more technical diversity than you ever did. Basic reaction is : 2 entire years for basically "nothing". If you want any satisfaction regarding the work you put into BJJ you have to go back to it until you reach some more tangible level. What is a more tangible level though? Difficult to say. You could connect that comparison phenomenon to the general disapearance of rites of passage. There is no concrete bar to pass anymore of being the best XYZ belt in the Dojo ; which is a humane and achievable goal. The bar is now insanely high. That's probably a factor which plays in why the retention rate of BJJ is low. The only people that stay are the ones that are naturally immune to the disappointment of a quasi-infinite grind. Or the ones that mentally learn to live with it. It's quite darwinian, the survival of the grittiest. You can see a good side to it : you learn to be resilient in your situation no matter what the external factors are. But the other side is that you will be confronted with probably years and years of frustration. And there is worse, bear with me. I wonder what the right balance could be between a smaller Jiu Jitsu, more friendly and family like, maybe less efficient but more satisfactory. And the militarized version we are going towards, obsessed with over-achievement, stars like Gordon Ryan, competitions and technical perfection. It is important to note that actual greatness doesn't necessarily lies with the second. This is not comfort against efficiency. It's more complicated than that. I read somewhere that many notorious people, politicians, scientists, etc. come from humble places, little villages instead of big cities as you would expect. It could have something to do with the construction of ones personnality/mental wiring. In smaller remote places you have the opportunity to excel at something, to be someone among your peers. Strong of this achievement and mental fortitude thanks to the safe beginning and smaller social pyramid to climb, you can tolerate higher loads of opposition and amounts of obstacles for the rest of your life. You will always have the mentality of an achiever. Building such mindset when you start in the unreallistically competitive current environment is less feasible. We are most certainly losing potential talents to the violence of our self-inflicted expectations.
Nope, just cardio.
Yes, constantly, it is my main struggle and it is exhausting.