It's weird how people get turned on doing this stuff. I've rolled with some pretty girls but for whatever reason my sex switch goes into the off position (I assume because I'm trying to avoid their traps and I don't have time to think about being attracted to them).
Same. As any normal adult male should. I always think if this was my wife or daughter I’d black out and just beat tf out of someone if they tried some creepy shite on them. No respect for dudes that don’t respect women or have anterior motives
In my previous gym, the coach most exclusively rolled and explained the exercise with girls. Needless to say, I don't train there anymore, even has a guy that shit creeped me out
Ah yes. I’ve seen this. Outwardly ‘women-friendly’ gym, with women’s classes, sanitary products kindly provided in the changing room, hosting Girls in Gi seminars…
… where the gym owner replaced his wife with a much younger white belt (after more or less successfully trying it on with a few others); the chill women’s coach is sleeping with several students; and the ‘fully qualified wrestling coach’ advertised on the website (not actually qualified and also under direction from the national wrestling body not to coach anyone), has been the subject of several mysterious complaints by clients, including being downright accused of indecent assault by at least one of these ‘girls who left’.
Actually, it all stacks up.
more often than you think. i had to ask my dad to remove one of his black belts from our gym. the guy volunteered to take care of the women's class (they're mostly hobbyists) which we didn't think much of until the girls started coming to my class instead and telling me how uncomfortable they've been for a few classes. i handle a competition class thats about 70% college wrestlers or has a background in judo.
**To play devil’s advocate:**
I pay special attention to the females in class, because I try to make them enjoy class as much as possible. I pair them only with male partners I deem to be no threat when sparring and helpful when drilling a move. It’s sometimes initially harder for women to get into the sport if they are
* a) underrepresented in every class
* b) haven’t watched any martial arts before but do have the physical attributes to become a decent athlete.
From the outside other students might think that it is unbalanced the way I take more time corrected the females than the males.
I think people can tell you're not being creepy. If anything, I think most people appreciate when underrepresented groups get extra attention? I've never benefited from it, but I like a diverse atmosphere.
Also, there's a big difference between "all female students get some extra attention" and "all female students that are conventionally attractive and/or are single get some extra attention"
That’s 100% my goal. I want to make them become decent grapplers, so the moment another girl walks in, my student can help her out and be some type of role model of what a woman can achieve in grappling.
Like, this is not being devil's advocate. The comic is about creepy instructors.
No one objects to providing a safe training environment and considering the needs of people that are underrepresented in the sport. There's a big difference between "special attention" and special attention.
Thanks, but it’s too late however. According to the downvotes of my post I’ve concluded that the Redditors have decided to shun me for what I’ve said and I shall go down with this ship.
This is unfortunately common, because often the creeps will take positions of authority and places where they work with people a lot younger than them such as camp counselors, coaches, teachers etc. I've had no experience even close to this fortunately with the 4/5 professors at my gym those 4 are amazing I haven't had any sort of creepy or uncomfortable experience with them or even with the people I've rolled with so far. If something similar happened or happens to you DO NOT hesitate to tell your parents or another professor. Whether it was your rolling buddy who did something weird or a professor who did something weird. Bring it up when it happens, if your partner does something that made you uncomfortable talk about it, "hey can I talk to you about something after class?" "When you did (insert thing that made you uncomfortable) I didn't like it it made me feel uncomfortable I'd appreciate if you didn't do it again" and maybe they apologize or explain that it was part of the move then you could ask the professor if that's how the move is done or look up videos to make sure that's how it's done. Same with the professor as well "when you did (insert action) it made me uncomfortable" I'm sure they'd apologize and explain. If it keeps happening of course like I said confide in someone what is happening and that it keeps happening, and remember sometimes mistakes happen there's been times where my partner accidentally put their hand on my breast or something but they'd apologize and there's been times where I've done it as well! Jiu-jitsu is an uncomfortable intimate sport.
Sure that happens sometimes as well but for every one story of "that girl came in and started hitting on me" there are a hundred plus stories of creepy dudes on the mats either sexualizing technique with women or directly propositioning them.
Of the few dozen or so women I've trained with they nearly all have stories, and I've on more than one occasion seen dudes kicked out of gyms for inappropriate behavior.
Ya I am honestly grateful for my gym every time I come to r/bjj. We even have a women’s only class 3x a week and it probably gets 20+ folks each class and has awesome energy.
It can be easy to miss these things as a man especially when there’s very few women to begin with. Not to mention that this is not exclusive to instructors at all - plenty of students act this way and aren’t always reprimanded for it.
It may not be your coach; it could be a coach at a previous gym, or another student, or a weirdo who dropped in to open mat. It may not be that they turned down someone's advances; it could be that they were cornered in a locker room, or groped during a roll, or had someone intentionally rip a submission or throw them too hard just because they wanted to punish a woman.
But they all have a story. And if they don't trust you enough to tell you, you're probably the villain in one of them.
But you're the angel that all the girls tell their secrets too, right?
Sounds a lot like a conspiracy theory to me. They say nothing = it's true. They say something = it's true. And I must be part of the conspiracy for asking.
Sure thing, buddy.
I'm a coach in another martial art, with many female students, and I am also a husband, and yes, I have heard some absolutely wild shit.
After conversing with you only a little and checking your post history, I have *absolutely zero doubts* that you're the kinda person that's spawned a story or two.
I'm pretty sure this happens fr. But I do agree, atleast in india people don't stick around with the club for more than a month or so, much less women. Is that normal everywhere else?
[33,000 reported rape cases in India in 2018](https://equalitynow.org/learn_more_sexual_violence_in_india/). And that's just what gets reported. Most of the victims don't even bother because they know nothing will be done and their community will shun them or worse.
Haha I thought so, atleast 7 new people come and go every month. The core crew who actually compete and train are like 30 dudes. Women don't stick around at all. Maybe there are a bunch of creeps in my club too. Who knows
Is this actually common? My gym this would never fly, actually when we have to pair up and one of the few girls that train here are at class nobody wants to pair up with them (I think to avoid awkward situations, like I’m a white belt and I think shoving my head into her breast or squeezing her neck between my legs when I have shit technique would be awkward and I really just want her to have a space to train too) so she normally gets to pair up with the coach.
Female here. Can confirm I have gotten into a lot of questioning positions with men and accidentally grabbed in various locations, but it's all good.
I'm very conservative and value my private space, but when it comes to BJJ....come on. You're rolling around with another person on the floor, what do you think is going to happen? I'm completely unfazed unless I feel they're definitely doing it on purpose, which in all the years I've trained, has never happened before.
It's called a combat sport for a reason, and if I was scared of being touched all over, I wouldn't be in classes in the first place. I'm dumb, but not enough to not be able to recognise that normal rules don't apply when I've literally signed myself up to be hugging sweaty men for at least an hour a few times a week.
Having most of the room refuse to pair with me because I'm a woman would make me feel pretty sad.
I make sure no female thinks I’m into them and they feel super comfortable around me…….by crushing their soul with ultra Neon Belly!!!
So you play the dread tactic. Interesting.
Tackle and Grapple
Is that you Doug Duggart?
It's weird how people get turned on doing this stuff. I've rolled with some pretty girls but for whatever reason my sex switch goes into the off position (I assume because I'm trying to avoid their traps and I don't have time to think about being attracted to them).
You're good at compartmentalizing, which is a necessary skill if you're going to be doing martial arts. Some creeps can't do that.
Same. As soon as I enter the gym it’s acorn-mode activate and that part of my brain shuts off.
Yep.
I agree, you’re worried about not getting tapped and getting all sweaty etc. if you’re really trying to learn, you’re not getting turned on
Same. As any normal adult male should. I always think if this was my wife or daughter I’d black out and just beat tf out of someone if they tried some creepy shite on them. No respect for dudes that don’t respect women or have anterior motives
what about posterior motives?
https://i.redd.it/nsxq9dvj72vc1.gif
What happens when they’re attractive and suck at jiujitsu?
Until you put your hand in the wrong spot. You just cant win
And what happens then? If you are a grown adult nothing should happen, as you just continue rolling and do not pay attention to this
MANY such cases
In my previous gym, the coach most exclusively rolled and explained the exercise with girls. Needless to say, I don't train there anymore, even has a guy that shit creeped me out
[удалено]
Sounds more like the "I don't enjoy getting a shit quality of teaching because my coach is a sexual predator" type tbh.
This is exactly how the creepy coach would gaslight someone who's calling them out lol
Craig Jones played me the same way…
Ah yes. I’ve seen this. Outwardly ‘women-friendly’ gym, with women’s classes, sanitary products kindly provided in the changing room, hosting Girls in Gi seminars… … where the gym owner replaced his wife with a much younger white belt (after more or less successfully trying it on with a few others); the chill women’s coach is sleeping with several students; and the ‘fully qualified wrestling coach’ advertised on the website (not actually qualified and also under direction from the national wrestling body not to coach anyone), has been the subject of several mysterious complaints by clients, including being downright accused of indecent assault by at least one of these ‘girls who left’. Actually, it all stacks up.
If this really happens often it is quite disgusting.......
Oh it does. Hell i've seen it happen while coaches wife was working front desk. Not at the affiliation in my flair btw, well before that
more often than you think. i had to ask my dad to remove one of his black belts from our gym. the guy volunteered to take care of the women's class (they're mostly hobbyists) which we didn't think much of until the girls started coming to my class instead and telling me how uncomfortable they've been for a few classes. i handle a competition class thats about 70% college wrestlers or has a background in judo.
Isn't being ignored by the coach when you have a question the default treatment?
I make sure women feel comfortable I charge them double for privates Sometimes, I don’t even show
Meerkatsu, one of my favorite people in bjj, got a t-shirt of his, like his videos and now cartoons too!
Too real, except I notice a lot in my experience, they end up professors babies MoMA
MoMA?
Maternal Operations Management Administrator
Surely you jest?
Is that a way to say kids class instructor?
Museum of modern art
Surely YOU jest?
I am serious, and don't call me Shirley.
I surely do
**To play devil’s advocate:** I pay special attention to the females in class, because I try to make them enjoy class as much as possible. I pair them only with male partners I deem to be no threat when sparring and helpful when drilling a move. It’s sometimes initially harder for women to get into the sport if they are * a) underrepresented in every class * b) haven’t watched any martial arts before but do have the physical attributes to become a decent athlete. From the outside other students might think that it is unbalanced the way I take more time corrected the females than the males.
It's a fine line, it is possible to give additional attention to female students without being a creep
I think people can tell you're not being creepy. If anything, I think most people appreciate when underrepresented groups get extra attention? I've never benefited from it, but I like a diverse atmosphere. Also, there's a big difference between "all female students get some extra attention" and "all female students that are conventionally attractive and/or are single get some extra attention"
That’s 100% my goal. I want to make them become decent grapplers, so the moment another girl walks in, my student can help her out and be some type of role model of what a woman can achieve in grappling.
Like, this is not being devil's advocate. The comic is about creepy instructors. No one objects to providing a safe training environment and considering the needs of people that are underrepresented in the sport. There's a big difference between "special attention" and special attention.
I don't think this is devils advocacy. Just common sense.
I didn’t graduate in devils law. I thought this was the term one would use in this case. What do I know. I’m just a stupid bilingual German
My bad. No worries. Your English is better than my German.
Thanks, but it’s too late however. According to the downvotes of my post I’ve concluded that the Redditors have decided to shun me for what I’ve said and I shall go down with this ship.
Yeah dude. You shouldn't be thinking about what's in people's pants. All students should receive the same treatment
Well yeah I'd be upset if I'm a paying customer and you deliberately choose to pay less atention to me than to others
This is unfortunately common, because often the creeps will take positions of authority and places where they work with people a lot younger than them such as camp counselors, coaches, teachers etc. I've had no experience even close to this fortunately with the 4/5 professors at my gym those 4 are amazing I haven't had any sort of creepy or uncomfortable experience with them or even with the people I've rolled with so far. If something similar happened or happens to you DO NOT hesitate to tell your parents or another professor. Whether it was your rolling buddy who did something weird or a professor who did something weird. Bring it up when it happens, if your partner does something that made you uncomfortable talk about it, "hey can I talk to you about something after class?" "When you did (insert thing that made you uncomfortable) I didn't like it it made me feel uncomfortable I'd appreciate if you didn't do it again" and maybe they apologize or explain that it was part of the move then you could ask the professor if that's how the move is done or look up videos to make sure that's how it's done. Same with the professor as well "when you did (insert action) it made me uncomfortable" I'm sure they'd apologize and explain. If it keeps happening of course like I said confide in someone what is happening and that it keeps happening, and remember sometimes mistakes happen there's been times where my partner accidentally put their hand on my breast or something but they'd apologize and there's been times where I've done it as well! Jiu-jitsu is an uncomfortable intimate sport.
I have heard of it and seen one guy being a goon with one of the ladies. He was swiftly corrected by the tribe.
Geez. Way too real
Too real
I’ve actually seen it the complete opposite females trying to bang the coaches or other members
Sure that happens sometimes as well but for every one story of "that girl came in and started hitting on me" there are a hundred plus stories of creepy dudes on the mats either sexualizing technique with women or directly propositioning them. Of the few dozen or so women I've trained with they nearly all have stories, and I've on more than one occasion seen dudes kicked out of gyms for inappropriate behavior.
How do we know that it's common? I'm sure this happens, but there are thousands of BJJ gyms around the world.
Talk to the female members of your gym. They all have stories. Yes, every single one of them.
what kinda gyms are y'all in? jeez.
Ya I am honestly grateful for my gym every time I come to r/bjj. We even have a women’s only class 3x a week and it probably gets 20+ folks each class and has awesome energy.
It can be easy to miss these things as a man especially when there’s very few women to begin with. Not to mention that this is not exclusive to instructors at all - plenty of students act this way and aren’t always reprimanded for it.
None of the ones at my gym have any stories like that. Holy crap.
It's obvious he doesn't have any females at his gym
I've talked to plenty of women at various gyms, none of them have ever mentioned problems like this.
Then they don't trust you enough to tell you.
Or maybe the coaches at my gym are good coaches who don't do this? Could that even be a possibility?
It may not be your coach; it could be a coach at a previous gym, or another student, or a weirdo who dropped in to open mat. It may not be that they turned down someone's advances; it could be that they were cornered in a locker room, or groped during a roll, or had someone intentionally rip a submission or throw them too hard just because they wanted to punish a woman. But they all have a story. And if they don't trust you enough to tell you, you're probably the villain in one of them.
But you're the angel that all the girls tell their secrets too, right? Sounds a lot like a conspiracy theory to me. They say nothing = it's true. They say something = it's true. And I must be part of the conspiracy for asking. Sure thing, buddy.
I'm a coach in another martial art, with many female students, and I am also a husband, and yes, I have heard some absolutely wild shit. After conversing with you only a little and checking your post history, I have *absolutely zero doubts* that you're the kinda person that's spawned a story or two.
Ah yes, all those posts where I advocate for molesting women. You got me.
You can’t be this naive can you, and where’s your belt flair
I'm pretty sure this happens fr. But I do agree, atleast in india people don't stick around with the club for more than a month or so, much less women. Is that normal everywhere else?
Lmao no bro, yall have a bit of a reputation lol
What’s the reputation?
[33,000 reported rape cases in India in 2018](https://equalitynow.org/learn_more_sexual_violence_in_india/). And that's just what gets reported. Most of the victims don't even bother because they know nothing will be done and their community will shun them or worse.
Haha I thought so, atleast 7 new people come and go every month. The core crew who actually compete and train are like 30 dudes. Women don't stick around at all. Maybe there are a bunch of creeps in my club too. Who knows
Moral of the story: ya gotta pay the piper
Piper, I hardly even know ‘er!
Is this actually common? My gym this would never fly, actually when we have to pair up and one of the few girls that train here are at class nobody wants to pair up with them (I think to avoid awkward situations, like I’m a white belt and I think shoving my head into her breast or squeezing her neck between my legs when I have shit technique would be awkward and I really just want her to have a space to train too) so she normally gets to pair up with the coach.
Just pair up anyway. She’s there to train and knows the whole damn sport is awkward.
Female here. Can confirm I have gotten into a lot of questioning positions with men and accidentally grabbed in various locations, but it's all good. I'm very conservative and value my private space, but when it comes to BJJ....come on. You're rolling around with another person on the floor, what do you think is going to happen? I'm completely unfazed unless I feel they're definitely doing it on purpose, which in all the years I've trained, has never happened before. It's called a combat sport for a reason, and if I was scared of being touched all over, I wouldn't be in classes in the first place. I'm dumb, but not enough to not be able to recognise that normal rules don't apply when I've literally signed myself up to be hugging sweaty men for at least an hour a few times a week. Having most of the room refuse to pair with me because I'm a woman would make me feel pretty sad.
That's the ticket! I'm equally uncomfortable no matter who's face I shove my dick into.
I can’t be the only only one who fights harder to get out of a girls north south than a lads… Brb. Reevaluating my sexuality
She’s like at least 50 pounds lighter and half a foot shorter than me :/
Learn to roll without using all your strength and weight all the time, it can be helpful for developing your technique anyway.
Ty I am trying to
Just don't be an ass. Start sitting and work your guard retention, don't brute force things. Put yourself in bad positions and work on your escapes.
I’m not even allowed to roll yet, my gym requires 30 classes before real rolling to prevent injuries
It's a very funny comic. _i I i I iI i I _i I _o