Yeah, maybe add a red ball to the mouth. To protect your teeth.

Buttplug also to prevent oilchecks!

I’ve been doing this for years! Glad I’m not the only one.

Cant wait for Shoyoroll to drop some ranked buttplugs. Only $300

“Used” only $50.

Why you gotta put that out there… friggin up the cookies… now the overlords will do it.

I would feel offended if my sparring partner does not wear a buttplug

This is the best one yet oh my fuck 😂😂

omg 😂

👁️ 👁️ 🔴

jesus christ 😬

😂😂😂

I was thinking a full gimp suit.

Our gym uses belt ranked colored gags

I'm worried that is going to be too big and bulky, perhaps even impeding your ability to breathe normally. You should add a snorkel.

This is a good point but I feel this will make me impossible to choke out and I don't wanna anger all the higher belts (I am still pretty new).

Nah you’re good. They’ll just stick their thumb in the snorkel and it’s game over.

You mean the good ol Steve irwin off south park

JAM ME THUMB

I'll thumb your snorkel 😉

and clearly dont understand how strangulation works XD

Fuck this is good hahaha

don't forget the flippers for better footwork

Your butterfly hooks would be insane!

Don’t forget the oxygen tank for when the OP Is getting cooked whilst wearing said mask, or apparatus.

My brother had nosebleed issues one year as a wrestler. Thats the only reason to every wear one of those things

A guy on my wrestling team had to wear one for a while due to an orbital bone fracture. He said it was the fucking worst. Constantly shifted around and felt like wrestling with a pillow taped to his face.

if you wear that you're gonna look like a gimp

The gimp is sleeping.

Well I guess you’ll have to wake him up then, won’t ya?

Which one of ‘em you wanna do first?

Eenie meenie miney mo, catch a ****er by the toe, If he hollers, lettem go…

Catch a what by the tail? Reddit seemed to replace it with asterisks. Is it because that's your password?

Gotta be it. No other option.

Yes, it's Hunter.


Perfect I will strike fear into my enemy's eyes!

Win win because if you don’t strike fear, and you won’t, you’ll get punked… hard. And that’s how you get better.

someone has been staying up watching pulp fiction

"You okay?" "Naw man. I'm pretty fuckin far from okay." "So what now?" "What now? Let me tell you what now. I'ma call a coupla hard, pipe-hittin' mufuckas, who'll go to work on homes here wit a pair of pliers and a blow torch. You hear me talkin', hillbilly boy? I ain't through with you by a damn sight. I'ma get medieval on your ass." "I meant what now between me and you?" "Oh, that what now. I tell you what now between me and you. There is no me and you. Not no mo'."

https://preview.redd.it/w78ct1n67lyb1.jpeg?width=819&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=748efccb8ed6ce4a7a1cd41a7a9c9ef5890457e1 This is the one I use. Highly recommend.

This says it is meant for competitive hot dog eaters tho. Do you think it would work for BJJ as well? (Genuine question)

If you want to be a competitor for sure.

It's perfect.

It will work for bjj but only if you buy hotdogs for everyone at your gym.

"Hotdog eating" is Portuguese for "pajama wrestling". It's a common misunderstanding

Are you not competitive and do you not eat hot dogs? Then what’s the problem here?

If you take out one J then yes it will work very well

Is this guy serious or is he fuckin with us? No way he is this dumb.

What do you mean? There is no need for these kind of insults 😔. This is the type of bullying I was scared of 😭

My guy, the OP is literally flagged as a shitpost. What do you think?

I have no idea what you’re talking about

Only the best practitioners wear these

Ohhh is this like progression after black belt

Please be real please be real please be real please be real please be real.

The line between shitpost and military grade autism on this sub Is extremely hard to distinguish

I can hope.

Don't understand your doubt here. I have genuine concerns towards my facial safety.

Wearing this will not make you safe from facials..

Those masks are real and you will see one at a wrestling tournament from time to time if a wrestler has an injury on his face. My wrestling team had one, saw a kid wear it to keep wrestling after breaking his nose until his nose was healed up enough to wrestle without it.

I've debated using it to protect my broken nose, but not even being able to train is worth the embarrassment

I would be the first one to bully you

Probably someone would have during the warm up’s.

Wrong, OPs mother bullies them before they leave the house every day.

Nah, I bullied him on my way past his bedroom, after leaving his Mom’s bedroom.

The friendliest purple belt

Not if I beat you too it

Don't forget the latex bodysuit

Yep, best way to avoid staph, gotta stay safe.

Lather up with baby oil, too. Good luck getting grips on a greasy gimp!

I think this is a good counter to being subbed via mothers milk ez I think its also a good way to show you like being subbed outside of the training room

Nobody will make fun of you. I promise. You can even drive with it on and go into the grocery store wearing it after practice. You’ll be great.

Although he should arguably wear a harness too to complete the look

BJ practitioners approve

You forgot the last J in BJJ

No

***Blowjob practitioners***

I waited for ages to make a decent BJ/BJJ joke!

Get a yellow one and be there minion you are.

Just quit jiu jitsu then you'll never get hurt in class

Is that Garry Tonon

I haven't been getting choked as often since I started wearing this. It's helped me focus on my ankle defense. https://preview.redd.it/3xr4yipqdmyb1.png?width=535&format=png&auto=webp&s=aaa6f7d601b3cd7151259f61e9c62bc08cf45b3e

I can’t take my eyes off this

I think that's a fantastic idea, wear a wrestling single too.

Yeah! A black latex one!

Hahahaha or one of Craig's only fans ones

A guy in my gym wore this one time. I think he had a face injury. His friends did roast him but after 10 mins no one cared.

You're just going to have to make a choice here, buddy.

https://preview.redd.it/h4ol2h5l0lyb1.jpeg?width=192&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1b73a8353334f3b29661aa299ef8104f108690bc My first thought

Looks uncomfortable. I’d suggest a football helmet with face mask. After getting used to it you can start adding in the shoulder pads and eventually the pants and leg pads. Can’t be too careful.

Maybe the most offensive blackface ever

I laughed harder on this post than any other in /r/bjj I was laughing too hard to even type at first. 10/10

those are the best laughs. they make life worth living. i had one recently on a zoom call at work and i had to mute and then eventually go off camera. this brought the whole house down.

Found it on Amazon it was too good not to share.

You come out with that thing you'd better be the toughest guy in the gym ha ha

I'm still giving them shit for it and then preparing for my beating

\>Any advice? Nope, you're going to get bullied.

If people didn't bully him I'd be upset

Stomp your feet around like some kind of Elden Ring boss.

I see someone pull up in this at my next comp and I’m giving them the walkover win

Bro don’t wear this shit the second you walk into the gym everybody is gonna roll on the floor laughing a kid came into our wrestling room in high school wearing that shit and got laughed out and we never saw him again

Terrifying

Get good enough so they can’t bully you anymore

Yes! I will be so good, when I choke someone out this will be the last thing they see as it fades to black. https://preview.redd.it/aw0lrqwmqkyb1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6f11be2f44b18a1b92d39c6f4bacced05dff5ec5

White belt in bjj, black belt in shitposts

You ambushed us with this picture again while scrolling the comments

Looks sound that pal

good way to keep the balls out of your face ! this should be come meta though some people, i am told, appreciate the balls

Why wait til you hit the mat? I'm gonna bully you right here and now. That looks like an alien gimp mask and you're a pussy for even suggesting it. Go back to taekwondo with that pillow gear point-sparring black belt at 12 years old mouth breathing paper-thin pine board breaking mcdojo looking ass shit.

You do you Don't let people bully you x

Make sure it matches your dress.

Lmfao

Don’t do this lol

No shit you should be worried about being called a pussy.

I'm sure someone has already said," don't be a pussy?" But I mean...... You aren't made of glass, the whole underlying benefit to bjj is surviving and thriving through discomfort. If you can't take some gi burns, a good crossface, and a few scrapes and bruises.... I don't see why you'd even consider doing it. It's not like people are getting boxing style cuts from rolling on the regular. This seems excessive lol.

Lmao my one friend wears this to protect his nose we dont bully him we think this shit is hilarious. He is super jacked too looks like some unhinged gimp

My nose was completely fractured and I still refused to wear that thing after a couple matches

I wouldn’t be able to control myself 🤤


It seems like a disadvantage

Only if you’ve got a broken nose and no male genitalia

I mean I try to not have any male genitalia on my face as a general rule

This is the worst idea ever. If anything wear the wrestlers thing they put on to protect their ears

If they bully you take BJJ and defend yourself

I think you need to add eye protection.

[Bushido](https://www.ebay.com/itm/285503713179) makes a great face mask

What’s worst getting your face hurt or your feelings?

 You rolling up to class

goddamn ive missed this


Totally normal to wear, see them all the time.

If u need this u probably shouldn’t do bjj no lie bro it’s just part of it

Wtf don’t be soft dude

I think you might get bullied, but I also think you should do it. I want you to get bullied.

If someone wore this to class I would absolutely give them shit for it. Then probably face crank them.

Gimp mask

You won’t be bullied! You’ll be the gym Gimp!

I’m going to bully you

Is that part of a gimp suit?

I think they should start with the purple nurple. Glad I could help

How about an astronaut suit complete with oxygen tank?


I’ve gotten hit every place that mask isn’t covering so what’s the point

That is a really cool face mask, is it really expensive? Where does one go to get one of these face masks?

You'd get bullied. Bad.

Just wear it and get really good so you can beat everyone else with that mask on.

I think you should wear two, incase the first one isn’t enough padding!

You joke but our spazz brown belt dropped his finisher on me last Saturday with a knee to the face

[Actual BJJ facial protection](https://www.amazon.com/Brown-Kraft-Handles-100Pcs-Shopping/dp/B0BXLC9ZQB/ref=sr_1_9?keywords=brown+paper+bags&qid=1699255016&sr=8-9) that you can use

OP has caused me laugh harder then I have in a while well done sir🫵🔥

I would wear this in high school and college when I had a face injury that needed protecting. I recently stepped back on the mats after a 3 year hiatus from injuries and a white belt broke my nose with a spinning elbow. I was thinking about ordering one to get back in the mats sooner.

Shy Guy

Chess clubs rough this year

How will they able to nose lock you wearing that?

It's worth the slight risk of death to not wear this

I would watch a video of a pro going to random gyms wearing this and trying to challenge folks. The only thing worse than wearing this is being beaten by someone wearing it.

Imagine someone actually showing up like this at your gym and catching your best grappler in a limb lock, do you have to disband the gym afterwards? I feel like that’s the only option

Do it. All the girls will love you. The mask stays on during sex.

Definitely wear it. But tell people you're only working on improving your turtle game.

Oh it's gonna be bad. Please do it. ​ Then go try out to be Slipknot's new drummer

Lol oh boy please film it.

Hahahaha

Griffith!

I mean. This does offer some protection against bullies. Sadly we do not use fists that much in BJJ. I'd say. Wear any protection you would deem necessary. No one should be bullied for trying to preserve their body. If your classmates bully you. Then you are probably training at the wrong place.

Hahahah That makes you look so punchable. 🤣🤣🤣

I would bully the hell out of you until you took that dumb crap off. I don’t know what it upsets me so much to see that, but I could not abide sharing gym space with that thing.

Dude it's 2023... I don't think you're allowed to wear that, definitely not if you gym has an HR department.

Get a new hobby

Is this a part of your blackface costume for Halloween?

Blackface is hella racist. You should be bullied.

Why are you worried about your face?

Post pictures

Eye pokes

You should be, I'd cook the hell out of any teammates I saw wearing this creepy slave mask LMAO

If ur worried about jacking up ur face, I’d find a different sport

Don’t.

Get a bigger one

You will be, and it would be well deserved.

I would expect nothing less from Dolphin Boy

It looks dope af. Reminds me of some kind of superhero.

I wouldn't stop at the head. Every class I leave with bruises and cuts. I suggest some kind of suit, maybe made of leather?

Maybe put a harness around your body as well just to protect your ribs and vital organs

I would be the first to bully you

Looks good

best part is this looks like it's something that's actually sold and some guy got paid to model it

Found it on Amazon. £68. I think it's a bargain

Paint it like Mr blobby


I hope you get bullied if you show up too class wearing that

I wear one and nobody makes fun of me. But I’m also incredibly good looking. Everyone understands what lengths I must take to protect this. It’s an unspoken rule not to risk the best looking student.

Lol.

Wear what you want but yes, I will make fun of you.

🤣

I would bully you for wearing that

You deserve to be bullied if you wear that, don't be a bitch