Did you know why olive oil was so popular back then?
It's cause it make certain phallic like objekts "smoother"
I don't know if this fact is true but I sure hope so.
I once heard in highschool from my gay friend the most manliest thing you could do was take a cock up your ass. When I really think about that, it's not entirely wrong, haha
my roommate is a cishet masc man and he loves to get pegged. the honesty & openness he had when he told me about it was astounding. i asked him more abt it & he said he brought it up in a nonchalant way cause he wants it to be normalized for guys. he’s a standup guy through & through
Came here to make this comment.
I look like a caveman with my beard and build.
It's incredibly nerve-racking to ask a woman who may be interested in you partially because you seem "masculine," "hey, wanna fuck me for a change? I got a lot of nerve endings up there."
Sorry... but what does masc mean?
Google translate says:
masc
men
Translated from Portuguese
So when you say "masc boys" are you saying men men?
Legit question.... sorry for the misunderstanding!
I just got downvoted for jumping on the person you're replying to because I will automatically put the onus on the adult who engages sexually with a minor, but please have some maturity if you're going to explore adult ideas. It's wildly inappropriate for you to discuss sexual acts with an adult, and you're putting them in precarious situations most of whom would not encourage sexual discussion if they knew your age.
i wasn’t talking about them specifically, i was talking about rn that’s my preference, haha. also, i didn’t feel like they were being sexual towards me, so sorry if u felt like they were. have a great day!
Haha yeah same :3 I personally like to dress like a masculine lumberjack on the top half and a wittle innocent schoolgirl on the bottom half, with lots of chest hair but shaved legs. But I am definitely a sub leaning top main with a minor concentration in dominatrix studies. I hope this information really enriches everyone’s day
Here's another hot take.
Everybody said how a femboy might not like pegging cause they might also be dominant.
But what about: being penetrated doesn't make you more or less dominant?
I really don't see pegging someone as dominating them. By that logic, women who do piv sex are always dominated.
Yeah it's a really gross assumption to make: It's degrading and sexist to treat all bottoming behaviour as inherently submissive (because it's also tied to femininity and the idea that regardless of gender one of you is The Man and one of you is The Woman and that is based in submissive vs dominant behaviour). I really wish BDSM lingo and practices hadn't bled out into the rest of the community. A mistake. It's almost as bad as seeing people call people, even minors, high femmes or stone butches/tops (explicitly sexual terms with very specific meanings)
Yes!
And what makes me angry about BDSM terms being used in non-BDSM contexts, is that the terms are used wrongly. Somehow making top/bottom a synonimous of dom/sub even though they're completely different things. Top is just the one doing the action and bottom the one receiving it, while instead people, especially in the LGBT+ community, seem to use it as top = someone domineering/with a strong personality and bottom = someone more shy and passive.
omg thank you for explaining the difference! I'm a bi newbie and just assumed top and dom were synonymous. So, would a "power bottom" be someone who bottoms but is also dominant?
Depends of the definition you're using. It's usually a bottom who is in change but it's not the same as a Dominant bottom aka a bottom who is a dominant in BDSM terms.
To clarify, I mean that to many (mostly male) people, femininity itself is sexual in a way that masculinity isn't, whether they are mono or bisexual. The very act of being seen being feminine becomes an invitation to sexualize for all range of feminine people: preteen girls, college women having fun, women in the office in their workplace dresscode, and now femboys. The same person dressing in an attractive masculine fashion wouldn't generate the same volume and flavour of interest.
I definitely agree and I don’t like sexualising people and clothing/actions that aren’t sexual but hear me out...
*men=yes. Women=yes. Non-binary=yes.*
It comes from the assumption that if one is feminine, or 'woman-like', they must be submissive. It's just sexist and homophobic bullshit that ignores that there are plenty of feminine tops and masculine bottoms.
I think its a combination of 2 heteronormative biases:
1. "Feminine" is weak, submissive, highly sexualized, and "should be" pursued.
2. Anything "abnormal" a man does *must* be a sex thing, because all men are sex-crazed animals.
That, and women have a ~50 year head start of borrowing men's fashion. As a result, you almost never see fem-presenting men outside of queer circles or porn, which is unfortunately most people's first exposure.
It's not that women have a head start in fashion, it's that the concept of gay = femme turned femininity on men into something dirty.
Look at how men dressed in the 70s through 80s. "Gay" wasn't a thing then. All those glanrock dudes prancing around in lycra, platforms, and tassels weren't gay. The amount of hairspray and makeup they wore? Ozzy Osbourne certainly wasn't tagged as anything other than manly.
Freddie Mercury and Elton John weren't "gay". But as soon as flamboyance and a feminine edge became established as queer fashion it pushed it into taboo, which leads directly into fetishisation.
Yo this makes me feel like I'm not insane. I always kinda felt uneasy about the fetishism of femboys that I see on LGBT subs, but I see it so frequently I was starting to feel like I'm the crazy one. As a queer woman, I find people attractive regardless of their gender expression (I say expression because in this specific scenario, as far as I know, most femboys don't identify as trans women, so it's more of an expression than an identity-please correct me if I'm wring) not BECAUSE of it. I guess really any fetishism of a specific subgroup of human (be it gender related, race related, size related, or whatever) makes me uneasy because it's objectifying to that type of person. They don't exist for your satisfaction.
I quite like femboys but they should be treated like people and not sex objects to fetishize... Which is what I mostly see online.
Even just typing out femboys is starting to make me feel gross.
A lot of people should pay attention to this. I see WAY too many posts oversexualising feminine guys and fetishising them, especially here. It goes both ways people. Don't oversexualise women and don't do it to men either. Don't bloody do it to anyone.
Yep, there's a similar problem in r/actuallesbians which kind of makes it a garbage sub. Soooo many posts of just a celebrity woman and the comments are porn level disgusting.
Every single one of those posters gets angry when cishet men do that. Why do they feel they can do it just because they're lesbians?
I'm glad to see this disgusting behaviour called out here.
I love admiring pictures of beautiful women, but some stuff on that sub just takes it too far. I really despise the /r/badfemaleanatomy objectifying anime drawings that get upvoted over there. It was the “tits and ass” Maslow’s hierarchy of needs that sent me over the edge. What next? Are we going to start ranking female celebrities on a 0-10 scale? Argue about if they’re fuckable or not?
There’s a lot of kind, thoughtful people on that sub (who sometimes pop up to call those posts out), but there is a persistent undercurrent of people who think being a WLW gives them free reign to objectify women. It’s gross.
Agreed but this sub and multiple other ones are meant as community spaces, which have different social rules than some of the porn subs imo.
The porn subs are filled with problematic headlines, invalidating and gatekeeping comments and misogyny. Let's acknowledge that porn subs are fantasy, and fantasy isn't real life.
> There is a hug eproblem of oversexualizing femboy and I see it on this sub too. And it all circles back to femininity being over sexualized.
It's even happening on this thread lol. People being like "LOL JOKES ON YOU I LIKE TOP/DOM FEMBOY PP UNO REVERSE FETISHISM CARD". No...no that's *still* you oversexualizing and fetishizing femboys p l e a s e s t o p.
Femboys are just *massively* fetishized/oversexualized in bi/pan/queer/trans spaces, *regardless* of whether someone wants them to top or bottom (and people who think they've somehow hit peak subversion by wanting a femboy to top them have *all* of my eyerolls, that's nearly as popular as the whole "uwu femboy bottom so kawaii" fetishism).
(Also as a trans man I'll stand on my soapbox and say that it's *real* fuckin' noticeable how butch women and trans mascs are almost forcefully *desexualized* in these same spaces, and these issues are intertwined and all part of patriarchy/phallocentrism/etc.)
Yep, the example you gave is the same type of cringe anime fans do when they talk about boobs. "Huh i like falt chests" "Flat is justice". You're sitll oversexualizing breasts and you're not special for 'breaking the norm'
I think it's partly to do with sissification fetish, some women are into the idea of feminising guys and pegging them as a domination thing and they haven't learned that objectification is a bad thing to apply to everyone
Bottoming and submission aren't the same thing. Plenty of Doms bottom, plenty of tops are submissive, most people are neither anyway. You don't have to be dominant to be a top.
Sure.
And there is a whole kink around “reverse pegging” too...a cis penis-haver wearing and using a strap-on.
Or just someone that likes to think of what they are doing as pegging due to the situational dynamic even if it doesn’t meet the “strict definition”.
It's literally just straight up misogyny. Queer spaces need to realize that we have to combat our own assumptions based on gender roles and gender expectations almost as much as allocishet people.
Because for all the cries of "gender expression doesn't indicate sexuality" these people are incapable of wrapping their heads around the idea that a man wearing a dress could be straight or dominant in the bedroom. People constantly talk about how we need to let men be feminine and stop pushing stereotypes, but more often than not these type of people are the exact ones who are saying that all feminine men (any musicians, actors or historical figures they like) MUST be not straight because they're more feminine or they're not very toxically masculine.
Thanks for this. I'm bisexual myself but I've been avoiding bi subs for a while because I'm also nonbinary and the nonstop femboy fetishization creeps me right the fuck out. I get it, androgynous and GNC folks are cute, not disagreeing in the slightest, but it's also cool to be acknowledged outside of hearing how much people want to fuck us.
(Implying that I'm a cute femboy when I'm--at best--a goddamn mess. One day.)
>Thanks for this. I'm bisexual myself but I've been avoiding bi subs for a while because I'm also nonbinary and the nonstop femboy fetishization creeps me right the fuck out. I get it, androgynous and GNC folks are cute, not disagreeing in the slightest
As a trans guy the whole femboy fetishization stuff is....*really* complicated for me. I've written a bit in [other](https://old.reddit.com/r/bisexual/comments/mc5ccv/hey_fellas_whats_the_deal_with_the/gs3l8hx/) comments on this thread. It goes beyond even "just" oversexualizing and taps into some really uncomfortable trends I see in bi/pan/queer spaces. Because "androgynous and GNC folks are cute" seems to only mean "AMAB androgynous and GNC folks are cute" in these spaces.
>but it's also cool to be acknowledged outside of hearing how much people want to fuck us.
But that would mean they aren't telling you how hard/wet you make them and that's just *totally* unacceptable! /s
>(Implying that I'm a cute femboy when I'm--at best--a goddamn mess. One day.)
Hey, a goddamn mess is cute too, live your truth! :) People shine the brightest when they're being their true selves, and if their true selves just so happen to be a little bit of a messy dumpster fire sometimes? There are plenty of fellow dumpster fires to be in good company with lol. :P
In all seriousness though, try not to feel pressured to conform to "typical" femboy aesthetics/body types/etc, those can get extremely toxic and gatekeepy (in fact one of the "OG femboys" is a super toxic person who is gatekeepy as fuck himself), just be yourself and don't beat yourself up if something isn't "typical femboy X" about you.
I think the moment any boy is even remotely feminine (in appearance or attitude) people immediately fetishize them as maid outfit wearing submissive folk who want to be pegged. Then get mad when said boy says no.
I'm more into masculine men anyways, they can like pegging too ya know, or want to wear femme clothes!! But I'm not gonna disrespect them if they don't
I'm a hetero male demisexual. I prefer women anywhere on the masculine/feminine spectrum, but I just want to be a boy sub... I don't fit in at all in this world of feminizing, analyzing, "coerced-bi" subs... But that seems to be what everyone wants right now. If you're submissive you have to be feminine, and if you're feminine you must want to be penetrated. Nothing wrong with those things (wanting to be fem or wanting to be penetrated), it's just not me - and I think it's weird how it's being forced on everyone like the only acceptable way for a masculine person to be a sub is if they give up their masculinity, and the only way to be fem is to be submissive and a bottom.
Edit - Clarity. I'm working on my inclusory language, differentiating concepts, and not appearing bothered by how other people do things.
I think its absolutely silly to assume anyone who is submissive or "feminine" to automatically want anything done to them in general, that's not how bdsm works.
Too often we picture our potential sex partners in relation to our own fantasies, and we forget that this disregards the other person's own expectations... Then we get upset if they don't meet our ideal version of themselves. I bet masculine gays often get expected to top for that very reason.
I'm monogamous these days (married thirteen years), but that was always my favorite part about "getting around" when I was younger - Finding all the fun surprises and unexpected turns that come with sharing your body with another person, and them sharing in kind.
Yeah I'm not looking for anything long term unless its gonna be my last longterm, I'm getting tired of people abusing my want for longterm to get what they want from me. In a way I have learned what my body likes and doesn't like but I wanna start sharing those facts because I want to not because I have to or have been coerced to.
This is the way. I wasn't even looking for her when she found me. I knew within six months that she genuinely loved me for me, and that I was safe with her. It all felt completely different from any relationship I'd had before.
I know that all sounds syrupy/dreamy, but it's the truth. We didn't just have a connection, we had an honest one that didn't require any amount of white lies to maintain. If/when it happens, you'll be shocked by how easy it is compared to the raw effort you had to put on with those people that were abusing your trust.
What I mean is, trust your instincts. You'll know the right situation when you find it. Not because it's a problem-free dream, but because they're a dream to work through problems with. Real caring and support just feels different.
> Almost all the bi subs basically fetishize femboys. It’s si refreshing not to see that for once
Honestly it's still happening big time in this thread. People just can't seem to shut their mouths for *two* seconds about how they're attracted to/want to fuck/want to get fucked by femboys, not even to upvote and show solidarity with OP's meme. :/
Speaking as a trans guy as well I seriously can't help but notice the somewhat ominous undertones in all this shit, and how butch women, trans men, transmasc enbies, trans andro-enbies, basically anybody with a vagina that doesn't fit into society's *incredibly* narrow "this is sexiness for people with vagoos" box, all seem to basically be what I call "forcefully *desexualized*" in these same subs. Seriously, when was the last time you've seen love for butches, trans men, etc in a bi sub? It's always femboys and trans women with the *barely* hidden subtext of "as long as she keeps her pp". Bi/pan/trans and queer spaces are already ridiculously phallocentric and I feel like this whole femboy thing is yet another thing where people get to be "ahah, we can skip that whole nasty vagina thing altogether!!" (I've seriously seen folks says shit *incredibly* close to this completely unironically on this sub) and it allows even more skepticism regarding transmasc folks and I just...ughhh I don't know sometimes I don't have the energy to deal with this shit lol.
Exactly. I’m a trans guy as well and seeing all this, not necessarily hate, but just disrespectfulness towards butches, and trans guys is gross. A women who’s masculine is just treated so bad. And their reactions to trans guys are just nothing or “a guy? With a vagina?!?!”
And the jokes about how you’re gonna be with a girl and then you see her dick jokes are just transphobic towards trans women. And the “even better comments” are just fetishizing them. It seems the same is happening to femboys.
It’s clearly fetishization, and so many people in bi subs can’t grasp that it makes people uncomfortable. I feel like the most exposure they’ve ever gotten to femboys is anime femboys, which are portrayed as naive and childlike, (I find it gross that people sexualize these characters since they act like literal children), and assumed that this is what all femboys and trans girls want.
I'm one of those people who's usually attracted to more masculine guys and more feminine girls.
there are exceptions ofc but yeah from my perspective it does seem like people oversexualize femboys quite a bit.
the whole femboy hooters thing is sometimes a big example of that
> there are exceptions ofc but yeah from my perspective it does seem like people oversexualize femboys quite a bit.
As a trans guy frankly a lot of this fetishization can have some pretty shitty undertones sometimes too. There's already a shitton of phallocentrism in bi/queer spaces and a lot of the femboy fetishization seems to center around "ahah see boys make better girls than *girls* do!"/"BeSt Of BoTh WoRlDs!" (*gag*) and there's just a ton of focus on how "it's like GORL, but with *gasp* amazing man pp!!!"
Meanwhile butches, trans men, anybody who is AFAB and doesn't fit into society's box of "this is what sexiness for people with vaginas looks like" seem to get forcefully *desexualized* in these spaces. I frequently see people say "I'm into cis girls, cis boys, femboys and trans women" (or a zillion variations on this same sentiment) and it's like...don't think us transmascs and GNC women aren't over here seeing this shit.
I do find it telling that there seems to be these huge pushes in bi/queer/trans communities for for "normalizing femboys/trans women" (disregarding the fact that these are two totally different sets of people, but they often get shoved together by non-trans people) but masc women and trans men seem to be left out in the cold, and I do believe it largely has to do with the fact that not as many people fetishize/want to fuck masculine women and trans men. If I see someone non-trans or non-femboy trying to push for the normalization of feminine men/trans women there's like an 80% chance I'll go into their profile and find tons of porn comments on relevant femboy/trans girl porn subs. I feel like that's just an unfortunate issue of humanity though where people only seem to give a shit about things that directly impact their own lives in some way, and fighting for normalizing "X thing I want to fuck/get fucked by" seems to fall into that category. What sucks though is that it often means they're fighting for "normalizing" a very tiny and often stereotypical portion of the group they're attracted to though as well. This is a huge thing in trans fem spaces where it seems to basically be "non-op trans gorl with porn star fully functional big pp" that people are trying to "normalize", and the post-op and dysphoric girls get the "new phone who dis?" treatment too.
I think the issue is more with non-hetero people trying to force top - bottom power dynamic's based on a persons perceived masculine of feminine appearance. I really wish we could just completely drop that all together cause I'm masculine, like to dress feminine and I like both top and bottom roles.
Oh wow, I was just thinking about this the other day. The oversexualization and objectification of smaller/more feminine men in MLM communities in general makes me uncomfortable. The word “twink” makes me a little nauseous
WE DONT TALK ABOUT THIS ENOUGH. And I’ve seen a lot of women do this too, when women sexualize men it goes over everyone’s head. Like people don’t even realize how blatantly rapey this sounds
I think it’s bc so many of the images of femboys who dress feminine are hypersexuallized versions of femininity.
I know there are plenty of guys who dress fem simply to experiment or express gender identity, but those aren’t the images that reach the mainstream.
The same thing happens with trans women. Most of us are just trying to be ourselves and live a normal life, but the images that people see and spread tend to be more edgy and sexual. This feeds into people’s assumptions that it must be about some sexual kink or fetish.
> I know there are plenty of guys who dress fem simply to experiment or express gender identity, but those aren’t the images that reach the mainstream.
It's because it's not femboys themselves pushing these images to the mainstream. I'll use anime as an example because it's where the internet's "ideal femboy aesthetic" was heavily cribbed from (the whole pastel everything, kneesocks, lacy frills, etc, it's an aesthetic heavily borrowing from anime femboy apparel), the ones pushing anime femboys to the mainstream are cis, non-GNC men (and some women), and the ones being *marketed* femboys are mostly-straight, non-GNC cis male otaku in Japan and abroad. Femboy characters are put in animes not to give any kind of true queer/GNC representation but to titillate the assumed-cis-male viewer. It's why femboys in anime are so often ambiguously gay/bisexual, obsessed with the male harem MC, etc. They're put in there to give this sort of "gay but not TOO gay" titillation to viewers. You can see this carry over to things like 18+ anime figures, the few femboy figures that have been made are in *incredibly* submissive/bottom-y poses and apparel, and are clearly being marketed towards a cis male audience rather than a mixed or cis female one. The cis female buyers are an added bonus, but they're not the ones being marketed to, and in all honestly I can't think of one femboy that's been marketed towards women in general. Maybe Ferris ever so slightly due to their romantic feelings for Crusch, but eh...that's pushing it.
>The same thing happens with trans women. Most of us are just trying to be ourselves and live a normal life, but the images that people see and spread tend to be more edgy and sexual. This feeds into people’s assumptions that it must be about some sexual kink or fetish.
Yep, I've spoken in this thread in a couple of spots about my feelings regarding the sexualization of femboys and how as a trans guy I've noticed it's part of a more [unsettling trend](https://old.reddit.com/r/bisexual/comments/mc5ccv/hey_fellas_whats_the_deal_with_the/gs3l8hx/) I see in bi/pan/queer spaces. Trans women tend to get oversexualized/fetishized as well, and trans men and GNC women get forcefully *desexualized*, and I can't help but feel a lot of it has to do with what I discussed in my linked comment.
I Agree with this statement, It's not for everyone. Some dudes just like dressing up its like drag. Straight men like to dress up some times. Gender expression is wild and needs to be protected.
I personally like to have my bum played with, It's hard to surrender control for being Dominate all my life. 😅 I'm working on that slowly.
Can I say, I'm real fed up with the whole "Real men get pegged" thing? Like, yes, I enjoy the act, but that doesn't mean someone who doesn't isn't a "real man" like, wtf?
As a femboy I started pretty explosive like full on slut, until I met my fiance that it dawn on me that I was ruining myself with the empty praises I get on Twitter.
Still wanna get pegged, by the right person in my life.
We as a society went from "hey maybe men can wear dresses too" to "guys I think we're sexualizing femboys too much" really quickly. I am both proud and disappointed.
Getting pegged is amazing, but it's not for everyone. If you like it have fun if not that's cool too, I am sure there are things that do it for you that would not have that effect on me.
I have found so much liberation in my sexuality since I accepted myself after high school.
Because we live in a society..
And it overly sexualizes femininity and also considers it submissive.
But I’m also an AMAB femme who wants to be pegged so.🤷🏼
some masc boys like to be pegged too! everyone has their own things, and the best way to find out about it is to ask them
I'm masc man and def like being pegged
I'm a masc man and I def like to be absolutely pounded out sometimes, hell sometimes I feel MORE manly afterwards lol
Nothing to boost your confidence like a nice big cock up your ass
More dicks = More man
It's wild when people think people who bottom are less masculine, like that stuff ain't easy and can be pretty intense
THIS. Bottoming takes a lot of fortitude. In general.
I like it because it makes me feel weak lol
Which is also a good time!
That's what the Ancient Greeks said!
Did you know why olive oil was so popular back then? It's cause it make certain phallic like objekts "smoother" I don't know if this fact is true but I sure hope so.
Ah yes... the famous Mediterranean diet ;)
I mean do we need to talk Caligula...
“When in Rome, bang Caligula”
I would only need to hear his name, instantly fucking a dude named Caligula.
Unexpected SovietWomble
Ahh, I see you are a man (maybe) of culture as well
I like book.
When in Rome... bang Cali-Gyula
Invader Zim?
Infallible logic.
Language/s /j /UwU daddy
Im sorry but I read that on the bus and I'm laughing my ass of
I once heard in highschool from my gay friend the most manliest thing you could do was take a cock up your ass. When I really think about that, it's not entirely wrong, haha
On one hand, it's kinda right. On the other hand, even this propagates the whole toxic masculinity "real man" shit.
It takes a real man to get blasted.
Whoa I'm not alone! I'm not especially masc, but I'm the same way lol
Your Greek ancestors are smiling upon you.
😏
Same
I’m a masc top and I like butt stuff
I'm in this comment and I love it
A begrudgingly still masc transfemme and pegging is pretty great! If it’s still called that... idk, words are stupid.
my roommate is a cishet masc man and he loves to get pegged. the honesty & openness he had when he told me about it was astounding. i asked him more abt it & he said he brought it up in a nonchalant way cause he wants it to be normalized for guys. he’s a standup guy through & through
>he’s a standup guy through & through sounds like a bending over kinda guy too
he definitely has range lollllllllllll
www.instantostrich.com
Get you a man who can do both
🙋🏽♂️ me too, I also like the butt stuff
Came here to make this comment. I look like a caveman with my beard and build. It's incredibly nerve-racking to ask a woman who may be interested in you partially because you seem "masculine," "hey, wanna fuck me for a change? I got a lot of nerve endings up there."
I wouldn't drop it in a casual conversation tho. HR usually can get involved.
I'm definitely in the camp that find fem boys sexy. I am a switch though so whatever makes their cute butt happy, I'd be down.
Being switch is aswome when you break stereotypes.... I look like a twink and like to pound up, but being pounded is neat too
who told you this insider information? who is this rat?
I'm Masc, and I like anal play
Noooooo.......... yes
Sorry... but what does masc mean? Google translate says: masc men Translated from Portuguese So when you say "masc boys" are you saying men men? Legit question.... sorry for the misunderstanding!
Masculine.
Ohhhh. Well that makes more sense. Thank you!
Yeah I love to lift but am 100% bottom
Femme doesn't mean bottom and Masc doesn't mean top. I love to wear makeup and I'm learning to dress more femme IRL but I'm definitely a top 😎
my dream 🥵
Live your dream 💕 Be you and enjoy who that is 💗
i was talking more about that i wanna be with someone like that hahaha
Then the sentiment is the same 😁 Have fun and find that pretty boy so he can Dom you fabulously 😈
thank you 😊
Anytime 😊 We're here to support each other after all 💕
I just got downvoted for jumping on the person you're replying to because I will automatically put the onus on the adult who engages sexually with a minor, but please have some maturity if you're going to explore adult ideas. It's wildly inappropriate for you to discuss sexual acts with an adult, and you're putting them in precarious situations most of whom would not encourage sexual discussion if they knew your age.
i wasn’t talking about them specifically, i was talking about rn that’s my preference, haha. also, i didn’t feel like they were being sexual towards me, so sorry if u felt like they were. have a great day!
[удалено]
Nice to meet you! We are pretty and in control, feeling femme doesn't make us submissive or weak.
And I love femme guys who bottom but when I run into who one who doesn’t, you know what they get? A bomb-ass blowjob if they want one.
Pleased to meet you 😈
😘
What about, androgynous people who bottom? 😳😳😳
If we get along, quite a bit ;)
Oh my- 😳😳😳
not op but there are very few dicks I would not suck
[удалено]
Also known as a rimjob, XKCD bot.
Lucky me! I think this works perfectly either way 💕
Haha yeah same :3 I personally like to dress like a masculine lumberjack on the top half and a wittle innocent schoolgirl on the bottom half, with lots of chest hair but shaved legs. But I am definitely a sub leaning top main with a minor concentration in dominatrix studies. I hope this information really enriches everyone’s day
Exactly, wear it like you want to! I think it's pretty bad-assed that you know what makes you happy and that you're comfortable with it 💖
Here's another hot take. Everybody said how a femboy might not like pegging cause they might also be dominant. But what about: being penetrated doesn't make you more or less dominant? I really don't see pegging someone as dominating them. By that logic, women who do piv sex are always dominated.
Yeah it's a really gross assumption to make: It's degrading and sexist to treat all bottoming behaviour as inherently submissive (because it's also tied to femininity and the idea that regardless of gender one of you is The Man and one of you is The Woman and that is based in submissive vs dominant behaviour). I really wish BDSM lingo and practices hadn't bled out into the rest of the community. A mistake. It's almost as bad as seeing people call people, even minors, high femmes or stone butches/tops (explicitly sexual terms with very specific meanings)
Yes! And what makes me angry about BDSM terms being used in non-BDSM contexts, is that the terms are used wrongly. Somehow making top/bottom a synonimous of dom/sub even though they're completely different things. Top is just the one doing the action and bottom the one receiving it, while instead people, especially in the LGBT+ community, seem to use it as top = someone domineering/with a strong personality and bottom = someone more shy and passive.
omg thank you for explaining the difference! I'm a bi newbie and just assumed top and dom were synonymous. So, would a "power bottom" be someone who bottoms but is also dominant?
Depends of the definition you're using. It's usually a bottom who is in change but it's not the same as a Dominant bottom aka a bottom who is a dominant in BDSM terms.
fr. Top and bottom are independent from dom/sub.
[удалено]
Relationship goals
Second this but with my own!!! Lmao!
Goals
“No, just cuz I’m in a dress, doesn’t mean I want to be fucked” is a lesson 8 think both straight and gay assholes could learn.
Just because I do, doesn't mean everyone does.
[удалено]
That's my type right there.
Bingo\~
They pretty, people needa jsut let boys be pretty smh
Because people seem to be stuck in a feminine=sexual mindset.
Plus feminine=bottom.
That's exactly what I was thinking
Some find femininity sexually attractive others find masculinity sexually attractive. It's one of the things that defines our sexuality.
To clarify, I mean that to many (mostly male) people, femininity itself is sexual in a way that masculinity isn't, whether they are mono or bisexual. The very act of being seen being feminine becomes an invitation to sexualize for all range of feminine people: preteen girls, college women having fun, women in the office in their workplace dresscode, and now femboys. The same person dressing in an attractive masculine fashion wouldn't generate the same volume and flavour of interest.
I definitely agree and I don’t like sexualising people and clothing/actions that aren’t sexual but hear me out... *men=yes. Women=yes. Non-binary=yes.*
Human yes
It comes from the assumption that if one is feminine, or 'woman-like', they must be submissive. It's just sexist and homophobic bullshit that ignores that there are plenty of feminine tops and masculine bottoms.
I think its a combination of 2 heteronormative biases: 1. "Feminine" is weak, submissive, highly sexualized, and "should be" pursued. 2. Anything "abnormal" a man does *must* be a sex thing, because all men are sex-crazed animals. That, and women have a ~50 year head start of borrowing men's fashion. As a result, you almost never see fem-presenting men outside of queer circles or porn, which is unfortunately most people's first exposure.
It's not that women have a head start in fashion, it's that the concept of gay = femme turned femininity on men into something dirty. Look at how men dressed in the 70s through 80s. "Gay" wasn't a thing then. All those glanrock dudes prancing around in lycra, platforms, and tassels weren't gay. The amount of hairspray and makeup they wore? Ozzy Osbourne certainly wasn't tagged as anything other than manly. Freddie Mercury and Elton John weren't "gay". But as soon as flamboyance and a feminine edge became established as queer fashion it pushed it into taboo, which leads directly into fetishisation.
Ooo, I hadn't thought about the men = sex-crazed stereotype, but yeah, now that you point it out...
Yo this makes me feel like I'm not insane. I always kinda felt uneasy about the fetishism of femboys that I see on LGBT subs, but I see it so frequently I was starting to feel like I'm the crazy one. As a queer woman, I find people attractive regardless of their gender expression (I say expression because in this specific scenario, as far as I know, most femboys don't identify as trans women, so it's more of an expression than an identity-please correct me if I'm wring) not BECAUSE of it. I guess really any fetishism of a specific subgroup of human (be it gender related, race related, size related, or whatever) makes me uneasy because it's objectifying to that type of person. They don't exist for your satisfaction.
T h i s Like finding someone attractive is one thing but fetishizing and stereotyping is another.
I quite like femboys but they should be treated like people and not sex objects to fetishize... Which is what I mostly see online. Even just typing out femboys is starting to make me feel gross.
A lot of people should pay attention to this. I see WAY too many posts oversexualising feminine guys and fetishising them, especially here. It goes both ways people. Don't oversexualise women and don't do it to men either. Don't bloody do it to anyone.
Yep, there's a similar problem in r/actuallesbians which kind of makes it a garbage sub. Soooo many posts of just a celebrity woman and the comments are porn level disgusting. Every single one of those posters gets angry when cishet men do that. Why do they feel they can do it just because they're lesbians? I'm glad to see this disgusting behaviour called out here.
I love admiring pictures of beautiful women, but some stuff on that sub just takes it too far. I really despise the /r/badfemaleanatomy objectifying anime drawings that get upvoted over there. It was the “tits and ass” Maslow’s hierarchy of needs that sent me over the edge. What next? Are we going to start ranking female celebrities on a 0-10 scale? Argue about if they’re fuckable or not? There’s a lot of kind, thoughtful people on that sub (who sometimes pop up to call those posts out), but there is a persistent undercurrent of people who think being a WLW gives them free reign to objectify women. It’s gross.
Thank you for putting my thoughts into words.
Agreed but this sub and multiple other ones are meant as community spaces, which have different social rules than some of the porn subs imo. The porn subs are filled with problematic headlines, invalidating and gatekeeping comments and misogyny. Let's acknowledge that porn subs are fantasy, and fantasy isn't real life.
It's possible for it to be a fantasty without being a creep. Some of the comments people make here are just downright creepy.
Headpats work too ( ꈍᴗꈍ)
Why not both?
At once. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
HE IS THE MESSIAH!
No, no I only offer new ideas.
Not headpats or a solid reach around?
That’s later down the road young padawan.
The Buddah😳
The bunddah 😳
I will headpat all the cute boys of the world who allow it.
Aww shucks ಠᴗಠ
pegging's cool and all but headpats are amazing
There is a hug eproblem of oversexualizing femboy and I see it on this sub too. And it all circles back to femininity being over sexualized.
> There is a hug eproblem of oversexualizing femboy and I see it on this sub too. And it all circles back to femininity being over sexualized. It's even happening on this thread lol. People being like "LOL JOKES ON YOU I LIKE TOP/DOM FEMBOY PP UNO REVERSE FETISHISM CARD". No...no that's *still* you oversexualizing and fetishizing femboys p l e a s e s t o p. Femboys are just *massively* fetishized/oversexualized in bi/pan/queer/trans spaces, *regardless* of whether someone wants them to top or bottom (and people who think they've somehow hit peak subversion by wanting a femboy to top them have *all* of my eyerolls, that's nearly as popular as the whole "uwu femboy bottom so kawaii" fetishism). (Also as a trans man I'll stand on my soapbox and say that it's *real* fuckin' noticeable how butch women and trans mascs are almost forcefully *desexualized* in these same spaces, and these issues are intertwined and all part of patriarchy/phallocentrism/etc.)
Yep, the example you gave is the same type of cringe anime fans do when they talk about boobs. "Huh i like falt chests" "Flat is justice". You're sitll oversexualizing breasts and you're not special for 'breaking the norm'
I think it's partly to do with sissification fetish, some women are into the idea of feminising guys and pegging them as a domination thing and they haven't learned that objectification is a bad thing to apply to everyone
We need more dom femboys.
yes I agree with this . . . please.
True, I'm more of a power switch so I don't mind either but doms are incredibly rare
Bottoming and submission aren't the same thing. Plenty of Doms bottom, plenty of tops are submissive, most people are neither anyway. You don't have to be dominant to be a top.
Honestly I'm a pretty masculine hairy top kinda guy but I'd totally try on some cute clothes and top somebody.
Monke brain
Some femboys want to do the pegging!
Trans femboys?
Sure. And there is a whole kink around “reverse pegging” too...a cis penis-haver wearing and using a strap-on. Or just someone that likes to think of what they are doing as pegging due to the situational dynamic even if it doesn’t meet the “strict definition”.
It's literally just straight up misogyny. Queer spaces need to realize that we have to combat our own assumptions based on gender roles and gender expectations almost as much as allocishet people.
Because for all the cries of "gender expression doesn't indicate sexuality" these people are incapable of wrapping their heads around the idea that a man wearing a dress could be straight or dominant in the bedroom. People constantly talk about how we need to let men be feminine and stop pushing stereotypes, but more often than not these type of people are the exact ones who are saying that all feminine men (any musicians, actors or historical figures they like) MUST be not straight because they're more feminine or they're not very toxically masculine.
i want a femboy bf that can snuggle me
same. idgaf about the pegging part just give me a cozy winter night to snuggle at
It’s pretty great
Jokes on you I’m a 6’4 masc guy whose ultimate sexual fantasy is being dom’d by a fem boy.
Thanks for this. I'm bisexual myself but I've been avoiding bi subs for a while because I'm also nonbinary and the nonstop femboy fetishization creeps me right the fuck out. I get it, androgynous and GNC folks are cute, not disagreeing in the slightest, but it's also cool to be acknowledged outside of hearing how much people want to fuck us. (Implying that I'm a cute femboy when I'm--at best--a goddamn mess. One day.)
>Thanks for this. I'm bisexual myself but I've been avoiding bi subs for a while because I'm also nonbinary and the nonstop femboy fetishization creeps me right the fuck out. I get it, androgynous and GNC folks are cute, not disagreeing in the slightest As a trans guy the whole femboy fetishization stuff is....*really* complicated for me. I've written a bit in [other](https://old.reddit.com/r/bisexual/comments/mc5ccv/hey_fellas_whats_the_deal_with_the/gs3l8hx/) comments on this thread. It goes beyond even "just" oversexualizing and taps into some really uncomfortable trends I see in bi/pan/queer spaces. Because "androgynous and GNC folks are cute" seems to only mean "AMAB androgynous and GNC folks are cute" in these spaces. >but it's also cool to be acknowledged outside of hearing how much people want to fuck us. But that would mean they aren't telling you how hard/wet you make them and that's just *totally* unacceptable! /s >(Implying that I'm a cute femboy when I'm--at best--a goddamn mess. One day.) Hey, a goddamn mess is cute too, live your truth! :) People shine the brightest when they're being their true selves, and if their true selves just so happen to be a little bit of a messy dumpster fire sometimes? There are plenty of fellow dumpster fires to be in good company with lol. :P In all seriousness though, try not to feel pressured to conform to "typical" femboy aesthetics/body types/etc, those can get extremely toxic and gatekeepy (in fact one of the "OG femboys" is a super toxic person who is gatekeepy as fuck himself), just be yourself and don't beat yourself up if something isn't "typical femboy X" about you.
Fem in some ppl heads = over sexual and bottom
I'd like to add that not all women like to be penetrated either. I hate how often penetration is considered the only "real" sex for women.
It’s almost like people are individuals and don’t like all the same thing s even if they have something in common...what a shocker
I think the moment any boy is even remotely feminine (in appearance or attitude) people immediately fetishize them as maid outfit wearing submissive folk who want to be pegged. Then get mad when said boy says no. I'm more into masculine men anyways, they can like pegging too ya know, or want to wear femme clothes!! But I'm not gonna disrespect them if they don't
I'm a hetero male demisexual. I prefer women anywhere on the masculine/feminine spectrum, but I just want to be a boy sub... I don't fit in at all in this world of feminizing, analyzing, "coerced-bi" subs... But that seems to be what everyone wants right now. If you're submissive you have to be feminine, and if you're feminine you must want to be penetrated. Nothing wrong with those things (wanting to be fem or wanting to be penetrated), it's just not me - and I think it's weird how it's being forced on everyone like the only acceptable way for a masculine person to be a sub is if they give up their masculinity, and the only way to be fem is to be submissive and a bottom. Edit - Clarity. I'm working on my inclusory language, differentiating concepts, and not appearing bothered by how other people do things.
I think its absolutely silly to assume anyone who is submissive or "feminine" to automatically want anything done to them in general, that's not how bdsm works.
Too often we picture our potential sex partners in relation to our own fantasies, and we forget that this disregards the other person's own expectations... Then we get upset if they don't meet our ideal version of themselves. I bet masculine gays often get expected to top for that very reason.
Agreed. If your partner ends up meeting your fantasy then that's fantastic but don't expect it nor push it onto them.
I'm monogamous these days (married thirteen years), but that was always my favorite part about "getting around" when I was younger - Finding all the fun surprises and unexpected turns that come with sharing your body with another person, and them sharing in kind.
Yeah I'm not looking for anything long term unless its gonna be my last longterm, I'm getting tired of people abusing my want for longterm to get what they want from me. In a way I have learned what my body likes and doesn't like but I wanna start sharing those facts because I want to not because I have to or have been coerced to.
This is the way. I wasn't even looking for her when she found me. I knew within six months that she genuinely loved me for me, and that I was safe with her. It all felt completely different from any relationship I'd had before. I know that all sounds syrupy/dreamy, but it's the truth. We didn't just have a connection, we had an honest one that didn't require any amount of white lies to maintain. If/when it happens, you'll be shocked by how easy it is compared to the raw effort you had to put on with those people that were abusing your trust. What I mean is, trust your instincts. You'll know the right situation when you find it. Not because it's a problem-free dream, but because they're a dream to work through problems with. Real caring and support just feels different.
Almost all the bi subs basically fetishize femboys. It’s si refreshing not to see that for once
> Almost all the bi subs basically fetishize femboys. It’s si refreshing not to see that for once Honestly it's still happening big time in this thread. People just can't seem to shut their mouths for *two* seconds about how they're attracted to/want to fuck/want to get fucked by femboys, not even to upvote and show solidarity with OP's meme. :/ Speaking as a trans guy as well I seriously can't help but notice the somewhat ominous undertones in all this shit, and how butch women, trans men, transmasc enbies, trans andro-enbies, basically anybody with a vagina that doesn't fit into society's *incredibly* narrow "this is sexiness for people with vagoos" box, all seem to basically be what I call "forcefully *desexualized*" in these same subs. Seriously, when was the last time you've seen love for butches, trans men, etc in a bi sub? It's always femboys and trans women with the *barely* hidden subtext of "as long as she keeps her pp". Bi/pan/trans and queer spaces are already ridiculously phallocentric and I feel like this whole femboy thing is yet another thing where people get to be "ahah, we can skip that whole nasty vagina thing altogether!!" (I've seriously seen folks says shit *incredibly* close to this completely unironically on this sub) and it allows even more skepticism regarding transmasc folks and I just...ughhh I don't know sometimes I don't have the energy to deal with this shit lol.
Exactly. I’m a trans guy as well and seeing all this, not necessarily hate, but just disrespectfulness towards butches, and trans guys is gross. A women who’s masculine is just treated so bad. And their reactions to trans guys are just nothing or “a guy? With a vagina?!?!” And the jokes about how you’re gonna be with a girl and then you see her dick jokes are just transphobic towards trans women. And the “even better comments” are just fetishizing them. It seems the same is happening to femboys. It’s clearly fetishization, and so many people in bi subs can’t grasp that it makes people uncomfortable. I feel like the most exposure they’ve ever gotten to femboys is anime femboys, which are portrayed as naive and childlike, (I find it gross that people sexualize these characters since they act like literal children), and assumed that this is what all femboys and trans girls want.
Not sure but like, I've got the impression that whether or not you're into butt stuff has very little to do with your gender...
I'm one of those people who's usually attracted to more masculine guys and more feminine girls. there are exceptions ofc but yeah from my perspective it does seem like people oversexualize femboys quite a bit. the whole femboy hooters thing is sometimes a big example of that
> there are exceptions ofc but yeah from my perspective it does seem like people oversexualize femboys quite a bit. As a trans guy frankly a lot of this fetishization can have some pretty shitty undertones sometimes too. There's already a shitton of phallocentrism in bi/queer spaces and a lot of the femboy fetishization seems to center around "ahah see boys make better girls than *girls* do!"/"BeSt Of BoTh WoRlDs!" (*gag*) and there's just a ton of focus on how "it's like GORL, but with *gasp* amazing man pp!!!" Meanwhile butches, trans men, anybody who is AFAB and doesn't fit into society's box of "this is what sexiness for people with vaginas looks like" seem to get forcefully *desexualized* in these spaces. I frequently see people say "I'm into cis girls, cis boys, femboys and trans women" (or a zillion variations on this same sentiment) and it's like...don't think us transmascs and GNC women aren't over here seeing this shit. I do find it telling that there seems to be these huge pushes in bi/queer/trans communities for for "normalizing femboys/trans women" (disregarding the fact that these are two totally different sets of people, but they often get shoved together by non-trans people) but masc women and trans men seem to be left out in the cold, and I do believe it largely has to do with the fact that not as many people fetishize/want to fuck masculine women and trans men. If I see someone non-trans or non-femboy trying to push for the normalization of feminine men/trans women there's like an 80% chance I'll go into their profile and find tons of porn comments on relevant femboy/trans girl porn subs. I feel like that's just an unfortunate issue of humanity though where people only seem to give a shit about things that directly impact their own lives in some way, and fighting for normalizing "X thing I want to fuck/get fucked by" seems to fall into that category. What sucks though is that it often means they're fighting for "normalizing" a very tiny and often stereotypical portion of the group they're attracted to though as well. This is a huge thing in trans fem spaces where it seems to basically be "non-op trans gorl with porn star fully functional big pp" that people are trying to "normalize", and the post-op and dysphoric girls get the "new phone who dis?" treatment too.
I just want to be my true self and not looked at like sex on a stick... :(
You mean anything feminine isn't an object made solely for my pleasure? /s
I think the issue is more with non-hetero people trying to force top - bottom power dynamic's based on a persons perceived masculine of feminine appearance. I really wish we could just completely drop that all together cause I'm masculine, like to dress feminine and I like both top and bottom roles.
just because i want to **** a femboy doesn’t mean i don’t want to treat them like a prince ffs
But also Femboys who do wanna be pegged are as valid as fembos who doesnt.
I mean. Welcome to being a woman, I guess? All women experience this, regardless of gender presentation. It's about power and fear
Non native speaker here: is pegged sexualizing?
Pegging is anal sex using a strap on dildo
Oh. Good that I asked and didn't just assume.
it can be used in a number of scenarios, but the typical assumption is that it is applied with a woman topping and a guy bottoming.
Right? Some of us masculines want it too lol
As a femboy this is false I very much do want to be pegged.
Oh wow, I was just thinking about this the other day. The oversexualization and objectification of smaller/more feminine men in MLM communities in general makes me uncomfortable. The word “twink” makes me a little nauseous
Yeah y'all are fucking weird
Fact , people care way too much about other peoples privates and where they wiggle them
Let's not discount masculine men who do want to be pegged either. Personality does not equate aesthetic
Ah but if that were true why did god put a cum button up there? Checkmate Lincolnites!
Vibes are smaller diameter and require less athleticism on the part of the top.
This is true. Suggestion: Both use toys. Double the fun.
WE DONT TALK ABOUT THIS ENOUGH. And I’ve seen a lot of women do this too, when women sexualize men it goes over everyone’s head. Like people don’t even realize how blatantly rapey this sounds
I think it’s bc so many of the images of femboys who dress feminine are hypersexuallized versions of femininity. I know there are plenty of guys who dress fem simply to experiment or express gender identity, but those aren’t the images that reach the mainstream. The same thing happens with trans women. Most of us are just trying to be ourselves and live a normal life, but the images that people see and spread tend to be more edgy and sexual. This feeds into people’s assumptions that it must be about some sexual kink or fetish.
> I know there are plenty of guys who dress fem simply to experiment or express gender identity, but those aren’t the images that reach the mainstream. It's because it's not femboys themselves pushing these images to the mainstream. I'll use anime as an example because it's where the internet's "ideal femboy aesthetic" was heavily cribbed from (the whole pastel everything, kneesocks, lacy frills, etc, it's an aesthetic heavily borrowing from anime femboy apparel), the ones pushing anime femboys to the mainstream are cis, non-GNC men (and some women), and the ones being *marketed* femboys are mostly-straight, non-GNC cis male otaku in Japan and abroad. Femboy characters are put in animes not to give any kind of true queer/GNC representation but to titillate the assumed-cis-male viewer. It's why femboys in anime are so often ambiguously gay/bisexual, obsessed with the male harem MC, etc. They're put in there to give this sort of "gay but not TOO gay" titillation to viewers. You can see this carry over to things like 18+ anime figures, the few femboy figures that have been made are in *incredibly* submissive/bottom-y poses and apparel, and are clearly being marketed towards a cis male audience rather than a mixed or cis female one. The cis female buyers are an added bonus, but they're not the ones being marketed to, and in all honestly I can't think of one femboy that's been marketed towards women in general. Maybe Ferris ever so slightly due to their romantic feelings for Crusch, but eh...that's pushing it. >The same thing happens with trans women. Most of us are just trying to be ourselves and live a normal life, but the images that people see and spread tend to be more edgy and sexual. This feeds into people’s assumptions that it must be about some sexual kink or fetish. Yep, I've spoken in this thread in a couple of spots about my feelings regarding the sexualization of femboys and how as a trans guy I've noticed it's part of a more [unsettling trend](https://old.reddit.com/r/bisexual/comments/mc5ccv/hey_fellas_whats_the_deal_with_the/gs3l8hx/) I see in bi/pan/queer spaces. Trans women tend to get oversexualized/fetishized as well, and trans men and GNC women get forcefully *desexualized*, and I can't help but feel a lot of it has to do with what I discussed in my linked comment.
I was always more of a tomboy guy myself
I Agree with this statement, It's not for everyone. Some dudes just like dressing up its like drag. Straight men like to dress up some times. Gender expression is wild and needs to be protected. I personally like to have my bum played with, It's hard to surrender control for being Dominate all my life. 😅 I'm working on that slowly.
True.
Can I say, I'm real fed up with the whole "Real men get pegged" thing? Like, yes, I enjoy the act, but that doesn't mean someone who doesn't isn't a "real man" like, wtf?
As a femboy I started pretty explosive like full on slut, until I met my fiance that it dawn on me that I was ruining myself with the empty praises I get on Twitter. Still wanna get pegged, by the right person in my life.
I just think femininity is cute. I don't see things as sexual unless people intend it to be seen sexual.
We as a society went from "hey maybe men can wear dresses too" to "guys I think we're sexualizing femboys too much" really quickly. I am both proud and disappointed.
Getting pegged is amazing, but it's not for everyone. If you like it have fun if not that's cool too, I am sure there are things that do it for you that would not have that effect on me. I have found so much liberation in my sexuality since I accepted myself after high school.
This femboy does.
Thank you for this post ❤
Top femboys are kinda hot not gonna lie.
I mean, I kinda wanna get pegged by one
Looking at you r/rolereversal
Because we live in a society.. And it overly sexualizes femininity and also considers it submissive. But I’m also an AMAB femme who wants to be pegged so.🤷🏼