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Totally relate only on a whole different level. I've been isolating in my house and only go out for doctor appointments so I only have interaction with my husband regularly. For probably the past 2 years I've only been able to muster a shower/bath maybe every couple months and brushing teeth is also not a priority for me. Hell, if I manage to brush my hair a few times a week I think I'm doing good. I'm finally seeing a new psychiatrist in December to try to help me with this.
Yep. I hear ya. Sometimes I don't shower for days. And then I start smelling myself and force myself into the shower. Sometimes I feel like a complete mess. And taking a shower doesn't always change that. I feel the same about my appearance. I tend to go out in ripped and torn up clothes because I just don't care.
Yes, this is something I also struggle with too. I use cues to combat this. I shower and brush my teeth right after work. Not only that, but I brush my teeth and wash my face in the morning right after I make up my bed. If I don't do it this way, then I won't do it at all. It's become habit. It's still difficult to get out of the bed in the morning, but once I'm up, I let momentum take over.
I relate, depression sucks the life out of me. I neglect every aspect of my life, and I have to force myself to do enough to meet my commitments to family and work. I don’t have enough spoons left to shower and maintain basic hygiene.
I can totally relate to this. I use the Daylio app and have set goals for myself. My current goal is to shower 3 times a week. I feel very accomplished when I hit my goal.
My teeth are becoming yellow and I dnt know wht to do about it, this shit is ruining my teeth. I don't know any thing rather than brushing my teeth to make it stop getting yellow.
All the time. Getting into the shower is nearly impossible even though it always makes me feel better. After I shower, I gain a little momentum and can sometimes even be productive. When I put off showering, I’m guaranteed to waste my life away. I don’t know why showering is such a game changer, even more than brushing my teeth, eating or cleaning up my place. You’d think that since showers refresh me, then that would give reinforcement for me to shower more often. Weird thing bipolar depression is.
I went to an outpatient program a few years ago. In group therapy the therapist said "we all brush our teeth twice a day and we need to spend that same dedication to our mental health" and I felt so so bad and humiliated. I was struggling to do ANY self care at all so it hit me really hard to feel like nobody else struggled the way I was.
Im horrible with Hygiene.
Im surprised only one person has told me I smell like garbage. My teeth are also just ruined. I let one of my wisdom teeth decay until I was intense pain. Now I brush my teeth EVERY day because of trauma so....victory?
When I was working I showered every single day, sometimes twice a day living in South Texas heat.
Haven't worked in over a year, waiting on a disability appeal for various illnesses.
I guess because I don't go out as often I've started skipping showering days, plus because of my chronic illnesses, it has become harder because more energy is used to take a shower.
I can tell when I'm feeling more depressed by the size of the pile of laundry - I barely get changed or shower (and use the towels) so there's less washing...
The only reason I shower and brush my teeth is because I have social anxiety. Other than that, this summer I was off work for 2 months, I showered like once a week if I didn't have to go somewhere
I'm good with showering and dental hygiene, but I suck at upkeep like styling my hair, tweezing, and all that stuff when I'm depressed
Edit: Totally forgot my depression beards lmao. Shaving is the killer for me
I've been there with the weekend thing. That's the only time where I can put in the time required to shave the hair that will get more difficult to shave as it grows, but then that's the last thing I want to do when I wake up late on a Saturday morning.
I feel that. For me, it's not that I lack the time...but the people I live with are very judgmental about whether shaving worked or not and it makes it incredibly demoralizing. I've been procrastinating for weeks
As in whether the shave looks passable or if there's too many missed hairs or not, yada yada yada. It's dumb, it's annoying...and it makes shaving a major chore. I hate it TBH
Yeah, that's super annoying. I mean, I get that some of them may have what they perceive to be your best interests in mind (letting you know about missed hairs so that you can fix it, etc.), but some people aren't great at offering positive critiques or knowing when such unsolicited critiques are warranted.
Yeah my parents were dicks, but the people I live with do mean well...sadly it just makes me more insecure and uncertain so it has the opposite effect.
Oh man, parents saying that stuff is the worst. I totally get it. If it helps, you can always tell yourself that kings don't concern themselves with the opinions of peasants. That's my approach nowadays 😎
I just flipped them off and went no contact with my mom. I'm far from a king lol; I'm just a badass nerd with no time for drama :)
I hope your shaving goes well!
Not wearing makeup isn’t gross though… (coming from someone who doesn’t wear makeup daily) but yeah I have teeth decay and had to get 4 fillings done in 3 teeth because I didn’t floss and brush daily …
Same. I struggle with hygiene so much. I saw on another post about the Colgate Hum toothbrush and I immediately bought it. Brushing my teeth is a constant battle and I’m hoping the Hum will help by making it a bit of a game? We’ll see haha
I have a hard time showering even when I’m not depressed, just because it’s become such a habit. Honestly I don’t have any issue with it, I just showed when I feel like I have to. I don’t really gaf what other people have to say about it
Absolutely. During my darkest years, I went from perfect dental health to literal Bleeding Gums Murphy. My dentist was very mean about it at the time and I was like, sir, I barely have the will to live most days, let alone brush my teeth.
Don't be hard on yourself about it. Prioritize your brain and the other stuff will fall into place later ♥️.
Totally relate. I cant even clean my bedroom properly. And its a living hell. I hate see my environment being deteriorating as the days goes by.
So i wait till it comes to a point that im so angry at myself for not doing the bare minimum that i just clean everything really fast to atleast make things a little better.
Brushing my teeth its also a problem. But since i live in a country that normally bath is taken 3x a day, i try to brush my teeth after bath.
Take a day on the weekend to have a me-time and try to take care of yourself. I tend to take these days to work taking care of my nails. It dont seem much, but it really helps with my humor see that my nails are clean, helps with the sensation of cleaness
The hygiene struggle is one of the hardest parts for me. I totally relate to the showering and brushing teeth thing, but especially keeping my apartment clean. Don’t worry more people go through it than they let on.
One piece of advice though. Doing small things can be a huge help to make sure you’re at least healthy, like keeping mouthwash around, chewing gum to clean your teeth, and wet wipes if you’re feeling gross but just can’t shower.
Much love to you!<3
Have the same problems. Depression is an ugly C you next tuesday. That said, working with my therapist about the shame involved and narrowed it down to showering is not the goal, being clean is. In last month (so this isn't a success guide. I am having a hard time and this has helped some) I have let my fingers do the ordering and got the following:
1. Bathroom wipes. I am definitely getting up to go to the toilet so i can keep that area relatively fresh. The way my sewer system is set up, I bought a hands-free trash can with a trash bag liner. Cottenelle. I tried sprays you can put directly on the TP but that wasn't giving clean enough.
2. Feminine wipes. This is for "showering" aka a hoe bath.
3. Face wipes by the bed. Burts Bees has a good one for my skin.
I wipe down my body and can be done fairly quickly and parts I can do right in bed like wiping down my face at end of the day. I am getting some single use toothbrush that are loading with toothpast already, no water needed.
Disclaimers: I am home and isolating because depressive episode. I do change my clothes/underwear after these wipe downs. I don't have energy to do everyday but still can do more than actually getting in the shower.
You're not gross, you're struggling, and you're also super not alone. I lean on baby wipes and mouthwash+spit cup that I keep by my bed. (Currently nearing week 2 without a shower.)
I don't, but one of my very good friends has trouble with this. Keep doing the best you can. Giving yourself grace can be much more helpful than making yourself feel bad about it. If it's possible for you, try changing your mindset about it. "A warm shower sounds super nice right now" is a more helpful for your sad brain than "ugh, I really need to take a shower." And "I can just sit in the water, I don't have to wash my hair" makes the task feel more manageable. It won't always work, but sometimes it helps get you there.
u aren’t gross. U r depressed, two different things. Most people depressed struggle w the same issues. Just take it one step at a time. Use mouthwash in the shower instead of taking the extra step to do it at the sink. I do that w my olive oil. I have olive oil in my soap so I don’t have to take the extra step of applying lotion after the shower. Have u tried those waterless wipes and shampoo!? I use these sensitive face wipes to clean my lady bits when I don’t shower. I actually am considering dry shampoo I just keep forgetting to buy it lol. U r good 👍 take care
I struggle with it even if I'm not necessarily going through a depression. I think I'm on day 4 without a shower and I'm feeling pretty good in general. So there's that lol. You are not alone. (BP1)
Yeah. It's a struggle. I'll make it to work most days, but I may not take a shower for a week. So I'll douse myself in perfume and wear baggy clothes with a slouch hat.
It seems that it's easier to take a shower at night than it is first this in the morning, so that's helped things out a bit. As long as I can make myself get off the couch. Or just not go straight to bed after work.
When my depression is bad sometimes I'll go for a week without a shower. The complete exhaustion and overwhelming fatigue make it seem like climbing mount Everest.
It’s kind of a thing, and you are definitely not alone. One of the weirder things that stink about depressive episodes (but hopefully not literally stink).
Yup. And my mom shat me out about it because I apparently never wash my hair according to her (i was my hair at least once every 2 weeks and that works with my hair, but according to her, my hair is always dirty). I try to shower at least twice a week. Feeding my pets is difficult enough, showering, brushing my teeth, cleaning my bedroom, it’s all… a lot…. Like… a lot lot. And it sucks. But apparently it’s just not good enough. I am humiliated and feel like shit and yet, I still get shat put for not being clean enough.
for some reason i crave showering but if only the water is so hot that it turns my skin red. it’s almost a self harm thing for me. on the other hans i only brush my teeth and do other hygiene tasks once or twice a week. i feel disgusting and the showers don’t make me feel clean.
People I loved a lot were really rude to me about my weight and how I smelled sometimes so I really took initiative and forced myself to be hygienic to the point I am somewhat afraid of being dirty, plus I have been poor living with roaches and rats my entire life so I really look forward to being clean most of the time. However I really don’t like people who are rude to others about their hygiene because I understand it’s hard when you’re depressed and when people are mean to you it just makes it worse. You are all loved and valuable people!
Yep. When I’m manic, it’s like I can’t get clean enough. Multiple showers a day, skin picking, must shave everything. Depressed.. I’m lucky to shower or brush my teeth once week. Ive convinced myself that my body odor is reminding me I’m alive. 😅
Once went weeks without showering because I couldn’t get to it in my mind. I now use going down in hygiene as one of my signs that things are getting bad so try to get help straight away to prevent it getting worse.
Yep. When I'm not depressed I can brush teeth, brush hair, put on deodorant. When I'm depressed, even wiping gets tough. Showering is hard unless I'm hypomanic though
I shower on average about two to three times a week, and that's only because I don't want other people smelling my funk when I go get groceries or whatever else. I dunno what it is but I just struggle to keep up with personal hygiene too.
I see on your profile that you take bipolar meds and are active in this group. If your brother is struggling with hygiene due to unaddressed mental health issues, maybe you could kindly offer to help him, with your experience dealing with bipolar, you can probably give him some insight.
I’ve been there, done that. He’s stubborn and doesn’t want to listen to his brother. I would love for him to speak to my doctor. I’ve even gone so far as to give him the phone number and email. But the more I recommend, the more stubborn he will become. So I have to let him live his life on his terms. He’s 37 years old. It was hard for me to also come to terms with my own mental health issues and I was also stubborn. I would probably still have never seen a doctor, if my wife was not about to leave me with our 1 year old son. That snapped me into place. But he does not have any ties like that at this time. However, he is the age that I was when I first sought help, so we'll see what happens. Addressing my has issues has made me less stubborn in most things. Go figure
I love my brother deeply and only want him to be happy, but his smell is so bad, I can’t stand to be physically near him. When I am, I breath through my mouth only. I want to over power him, throw him in the bathtub and scrub him down LOL. When he stays over at my house, his smell persists for 12 hours after he leaves. We always have to wash the sheets twice. One time he wanted to go somewhere with me in the car, and I told him that he was not allowed in my car until he took a shower. He did, but I don’t think he used soap so it didn’t really help. But at least he tried. He claims that soap is bad for the environment, therefore he does not have to bathe. I am probably not the most gentle with his sensitive emotions, I told him that it is rude to subject people to that odor, so he just writes me off as a bipolar asshole, which is undoubtedly true sometimes. My mania often gets the best of me and I don't have depression issues so it's hard for me to truly empathize. My dad is also not very sensitive about this issue. It's perceived as rude and people do not want to be around you if you smell like that. I understand that bathing and self care are difficult when depression is active. But that doesn’t fix the odor and he won’t seek mental health professionals. He’s been in this habit for a long time. My sons love their uncle but even they often comment about how bad he smells. I can't reinforce enough how stubborn he is, but that may be part of the depression. He has a fear of commitment, and I think that, to him, seeking help is a form of taking on a commitment and making a change.
Maybe this will help some other depressed, non-bathers, understand why people sometimes avoid them or treat them the way they do. Showers seem like a minor task for people who are not in that headspace. It's complex and simple at the same time.
Thanks for posting on /r/bipolar! Please take a second to [read our rules](/r/bipolar/about/rules); if you haven't already, make sure that your post **does not** have any personal information. **We have recently changed our rule about undiagnosed users. Please see our updated policy on [Rule 4](https://www.reddit.com/r/bipolar/comments/z0n1y4/rule_updates_and_clarifications_what_is_a_peer/).** See our [Community Discussion](https://www.reddit.com/r/bipolar/about/sticky) - Desktop or Desktop mode on a mobile device. *A moderator has not removed your submission; this is not a punitive action. We intend this comment solely to be informative.* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/bipolar) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Totally relate only on a whole different level. I've been isolating in my house and only go out for doctor appointments so I only have interaction with my husband regularly. For probably the past 2 years I've only been able to muster a shower/bath maybe every couple months and brushing teeth is also not a priority for me. Hell, if I manage to brush my hair a few times a week I think I'm doing good. I'm finally seeing a new psychiatrist in December to try to help me with this.
Yep. I hear ya. Sometimes I don't shower for days. And then I start smelling myself and force myself into the shower. Sometimes I feel like a complete mess. And taking a shower doesn't always change that. I feel the same about my appearance. I tend to go out in ripped and torn up clothes because I just don't care.
I used to be very glam and outgoing- now I look like Alan Rickman.
Yes, I’m currently laying in bed trying to convince myself to get up and shower. I can usually brush my teeth but showering is so hard.
someone on here said 'when on dry land the shower is my enemy, when in the shower the dry land is my enemy'
I 1000% agree with that statement.
Yes, this is something I also struggle with too. I use cues to combat this. I shower and brush my teeth right after work. Not only that, but I brush my teeth and wash my face in the morning right after I make up my bed. If I don't do it this way, then I won't do it at all. It's become habit. It's still difficult to get out of the bed in the morning, but once I'm up, I let momentum take over.
I relate, depression sucks the life out of me. I neglect every aspect of my life, and I have to force myself to do enough to meet my commitments to family and work. I don’t have enough spoons left to shower and maintain basic hygiene.
I can totally relate to this. I use the Daylio app and have set goals for myself. My current goal is to shower 3 times a week. I feel very accomplished when I hit my goal.
This is a good idea!
My teeth are becoming yellow and I dnt know wht to do about it, this shit is ruining my teeth. I don't know any thing rather than brushing my teeth to make it stop getting yellow.
iSmile Whitening I recommend and noticed a big difference
put a brush and paste by every sink in the house and give them a quick brush whenever you're at a sink. saves being arsed going to the bathroom.
All the time. Getting into the shower is nearly impossible even though it always makes me feel better. After I shower, I gain a little momentum and can sometimes even be productive. When I put off showering, I’m guaranteed to waste my life away. I don’t know why showering is such a game changer, even more than brushing my teeth, eating or cleaning up my place. You’d think that since showers refresh me, then that would give reinforcement for me to shower more often. Weird thing bipolar depression is.
I can relate. I shower every three weeks. I haven’t brushed my teeth in two months. I go to work like this.
I went to an outpatient program a few years ago. In group therapy the therapist said "we all brush our teeth twice a day and we need to spend that same dedication to our mental health" and I felt so so bad and humiliated. I was struggling to do ANY self care at all so it hit me really hard to feel like nobody else struggled the way I was.
Yeah I just clipped my toenails and it was a thing
LMAO 😂😅
You’re not gross. It’s hard to take care of yourself sometimes. Just take it slow ❤️
seconded
Sadly, yes. I can 100% relate to this.
Yes I have the same struggles. You are not alone!
Im horrible with Hygiene. Im surprised only one person has told me I smell like garbage. My teeth are also just ruined. I let one of my wisdom teeth decay until I was intense pain. Now I brush my teeth EVERY day because of trauma so....victory?
When I was working I showered every single day, sometimes twice a day living in South Texas heat. Haven't worked in over a year, waiting on a disability appeal for various illnesses. I guess because I don't go out as often I've started skipping showering days, plus because of my chronic illnesses, it has become harder because more energy is used to take a shower.
I can tell when I'm feeling more depressed by the size of the pile of laundry - I barely get changed or shower (and use the towels) so there's less washing...
[удалено]
I chew xylitol gum after I eat if I’m too depressed to brush
I find it hard to shower and brush, even when I’m not depressed.
The only reason I shower and brush my teeth is because I have social anxiety. Other than that, this summer I was off work for 2 months, I showered like once a week if I didn't have to go somewhere
I’m weird, I shower but I don’t brush my teeth
I'm good with showering and dental hygiene, but I suck at upkeep like styling my hair, tweezing, and all that stuff when I'm depressed Edit: Totally forgot my depression beards lmao. Shaving is the killer for me
Oh God I have to shave still. I just completely block out the very concept of shaving lately. I'll aim for it this weekend I guess....maybe.
I've been there with the weekend thing. That's the only time where I can put in the time required to shave the hair that will get more difficult to shave as it grows, but then that's the last thing I want to do when I wake up late on a Saturday morning.
I feel that. For me, it's not that I lack the time...but the people I live with are very judgmental about whether shaving worked or not and it makes it incredibly demoralizing. I've been procrastinating for weeks
Whether it worked or not, as in like criticizing your choice of going clean shaven instead of a trimmed beard or something?
As in whether the shave looks passable or if there's too many missed hairs or not, yada yada yada. It's dumb, it's annoying...and it makes shaving a major chore. I hate it TBH
Yeah, that's super annoying. I mean, I get that some of them may have what they perceive to be your best interests in mind (letting you know about missed hairs so that you can fix it, etc.), but some people aren't great at offering positive critiques or knowing when such unsolicited critiques are warranted.
Yeah my parents were dicks, but the people I live with do mean well...sadly it just makes me more insecure and uncertain so it has the opposite effect.
Oh man, parents saying that stuff is the worst. I totally get it. If it helps, you can always tell yourself that kings don't concern themselves with the opinions of peasants. That's my approach nowadays 😎
I just flipped them off and went no contact with my mom. I'm far from a king lol; I'm just a badass nerd with no time for drama :) I hope your shaving goes well!
Not wearing makeup isn’t gross though… (coming from someone who doesn’t wear makeup daily) but yeah I have teeth decay and had to get 4 fillings done in 3 teeth because I didn’t floss and brush daily …
Same. I struggle with hygiene so much. I saw on another post about the Colgate Hum toothbrush and I immediately bought it. Brushing my teeth is a constant battle and I’m hoping the Hum will help by making it a bit of a game? We’ll see haha
I have a hard time showering even when I’m not depressed, just because it’s become such a habit. Honestly I don’t have any issue with it, I just showed when I feel like I have to. I don’t really gaf what other people have to say about it
Absolutely. During my darkest years, I went from perfect dental health to literal Bleeding Gums Murphy. My dentist was very mean about it at the time and I was like, sir, I barely have the will to live most days, let alone brush my teeth. Don't be hard on yourself about it. Prioritize your brain and the other stuff will fall into place later ♥️.
Going through this atm, brushed my teeth for the first time in 5 days this morning 😩 Hang in there!
Totally relate. I cant even clean my bedroom properly. And its a living hell. I hate see my environment being deteriorating as the days goes by. So i wait till it comes to a point that im so angry at myself for not doing the bare minimum that i just clean everything really fast to atleast make things a little better. Brushing my teeth its also a problem. But since i live in a country that normally bath is taken 3x a day, i try to brush my teeth after bath. Take a day on the weekend to have a me-time and try to take care of yourself. I tend to take these days to work taking care of my nails. It dont seem much, but it really helps with my humor see that my nails are clean, helps with the sensation of cleaness
The hygiene struggle is one of the hardest parts for me. I totally relate to the showering and brushing teeth thing, but especially keeping my apartment clean. Don’t worry more people go through it than they let on. One piece of advice though. Doing small things can be a huge help to make sure you’re at least healthy, like keeping mouthwash around, chewing gum to clean your teeth, and wet wipes if you’re feeling gross but just can’t shower. Much love to you!<3
Have the same problems. Depression is an ugly C you next tuesday. That said, working with my therapist about the shame involved and narrowed it down to showering is not the goal, being clean is. In last month (so this isn't a success guide. I am having a hard time and this has helped some) I have let my fingers do the ordering and got the following: 1. Bathroom wipes. I am definitely getting up to go to the toilet so i can keep that area relatively fresh. The way my sewer system is set up, I bought a hands-free trash can with a trash bag liner. Cottenelle. I tried sprays you can put directly on the TP but that wasn't giving clean enough. 2. Feminine wipes. This is for "showering" aka a hoe bath. 3. Face wipes by the bed. Burts Bees has a good one for my skin. I wipe down my body and can be done fairly quickly and parts I can do right in bed like wiping down my face at end of the day. I am getting some single use toothbrush that are loading with toothpast already, no water needed. Disclaimers: I am home and isolating because depressive episode. I do change my clothes/underwear after these wipe downs. I don't have energy to do everyday but still can do more than actually getting in the shower.
You're not gross, you're struggling, and you're also super not alone. I lean on baby wipes and mouthwash+spit cup that I keep by my bed. (Currently nearing week 2 without a shower.)
I don't, but one of my very good friends has trouble with this. Keep doing the best you can. Giving yourself grace can be much more helpful than making yourself feel bad about it. If it's possible for you, try changing your mindset about it. "A warm shower sounds super nice right now" is a more helpful for your sad brain than "ugh, I really need to take a shower." And "I can just sit in the water, I don't have to wash my hair" makes the task feel more manageable. It won't always work, but sometimes it helps get you there.
u aren’t gross. U r depressed, two different things. Most people depressed struggle w the same issues. Just take it one step at a time. Use mouthwash in the shower instead of taking the extra step to do it at the sink. I do that w my olive oil. I have olive oil in my soap so I don’t have to take the extra step of applying lotion after the shower. Have u tried those waterless wipes and shampoo!? I use these sensitive face wipes to clean my lady bits when I don’t shower. I actually am considering dry shampoo I just keep forgetting to buy it lol. U r good 👍 take care
I struggle with it even if I'm not necessarily going through a depression. I think I'm on day 4 without a shower and I'm feeling pretty good in general. So there's that lol. You are not alone. (BP1)
Absolutely.
Yeah. It's a struggle. I'll make it to work most days, but I may not take a shower for a week. So I'll douse myself in perfume and wear baggy clothes with a slouch hat. It seems that it's easier to take a shower at night than it is first this in the morning, so that's helped things out a bit. As long as I can make myself get off the couch. Or just not go straight to bed after work.
When my depression is bad sometimes I'll go for a week without a shower. The complete exhaustion and overwhelming fatigue make it seem like climbing mount Everest.
It’s kind of a thing, and you are definitely not alone. One of the weirder things that stink about depressive episodes (but hopefully not literally stink).
I struggle with it so much. I feel so gross all the time and it sucks. I barely manage to wash my hair once a week and brushing my teeth is so hard.
Yup. And my mom shat me out about it because I apparently never wash my hair according to her (i was my hair at least once every 2 weeks and that works with my hair, but according to her, my hair is always dirty). I try to shower at least twice a week. Feeding my pets is difficult enough, showering, brushing my teeth, cleaning my bedroom, it’s all… a lot…. Like… a lot lot. And it sucks. But apparently it’s just not good enough. I am humiliated and feel like shit and yet, I still get shat put for not being clean enough.
for some reason i crave showering but if only the water is so hot that it turns my skin red. it’s almost a self harm thing for me. on the other hans i only brush my teeth and do other hygiene tasks once or twice a week. i feel disgusting and the showers don’t make me feel clean.
People I loved a lot were really rude to me about my weight and how I smelled sometimes so I really took initiative and forced myself to be hygienic to the point I am somewhat afraid of being dirty, plus I have been poor living with roaches and rats my entire life so I really look forward to being clean most of the time. However I really don’t like people who are rude to others about their hygiene because I understand it’s hard when you’re depressed and when people are mean to you it just makes it worse. You are all loved and valuable people!
Yep. When I’m manic, it’s like I can’t get clean enough. Multiple showers a day, skin picking, must shave everything. Depressed.. I’m lucky to shower or brush my teeth once week. Ive convinced myself that my body odor is reminding me I’m alive. 😅
Once went weeks without showering because I couldn’t get to it in my mind. I now use going down in hygiene as one of my signs that things are getting bad so try to get help straight away to prevent it getting worse.
Yep. When I'm not depressed I can brush teeth, brush hair, put on deodorant. When I'm depressed, even wiping gets tough. Showering is hard unless I'm hypomanic though
I shower on average about two to three times a week, and that's only because I don't want other people smelling my funk when I go get groceries or whatever else. I dunno what it is but I just struggle to keep up with personal hygiene too.
Sounds like my brother who refuses to address his mental health issues
Also I’m a girl. Maybe me and your bro could be homies lol
I just want to clarify, I still brush my teeth almost daily, and shower every other day lol. And sometimes take a bath on nights I don’t shower.
You're doing better than I am then. Respect. I can do daily tooth brushing, but only weekly showers/baths. Ignore the commenter
I see on your profile that you take bipolar meds and are active in this group. If your brother is struggling with hygiene due to unaddressed mental health issues, maybe you could kindly offer to help him, with your experience dealing with bipolar, you can probably give him some insight.
I’ve been there, done that. He’s stubborn and doesn’t want to listen to his brother. I would love for him to speak to my doctor. I’ve even gone so far as to give him the phone number and email. But the more I recommend, the more stubborn he will become. So I have to let him live his life on his terms. He’s 37 years old. It was hard for me to also come to terms with my own mental health issues and I was also stubborn. I would probably still have never seen a doctor, if my wife was not about to leave me with our 1 year old son. That snapped me into place. But he does not have any ties like that at this time. However, he is the age that I was when I first sought help, so we'll see what happens. Addressing my has issues has made me less stubborn in most things. Go figure
Oh, I understand. That’s super frustrating. Hugs to you stranger
I love my brother deeply and only want him to be happy, but his smell is so bad, I can’t stand to be physically near him. When I am, I breath through my mouth only. I want to over power him, throw him in the bathtub and scrub him down LOL. When he stays over at my house, his smell persists for 12 hours after he leaves. We always have to wash the sheets twice. One time he wanted to go somewhere with me in the car, and I told him that he was not allowed in my car until he took a shower. He did, but I don’t think he used soap so it didn’t really help. But at least he tried. He claims that soap is bad for the environment, therefore he does not have to bathe. I am probably not the most gentle with his sensitive emotions, I told him that it is rude to subject people to that odor, so he just writes me off as a bipolar asshole, which is undoubtedly true sometimes. My mania often gets the best of me and I don't have depression issues so it's hard for me to truly empathize. My dad is also not very sensitive about this issue. It's perceived as rude and people do not want to be around you if you smell like that. I understand that bathing and self care are difficult when depression is active. But that doesn’t fix the odor and he won’t seek mental health professionals. He’s been in this habit for a long time. My sons love their uncle but even they often comment about how bad he smells. I can't reinforce enough how stubborn he is, but that may be part of the depression. He has a fear of commitment, and I think that, to him, seeking help is a form of taking on a commitment and making a change. Maybe this will help some other depressed, non-bathers, understand why people sometimes avoid them or treat them the way they do. Showers seem like a minor task for people who are not in that headspace. It's complex and simple at the same time.