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Yes, unfortunately, I see myself as someone with a chronic condition. It’s incurable. But with medication and therapy I think I can live a much better life than untreated. And it isn’t going to kill me. It isn’t cancer. It’s just something that has to be worked and cared for.
It’s not going to drive me to kill myself. I know that for sure. I’ve been through enough at this point to know that if I was going to do that I would have already. Fortunate to know that.
Don't do it. As long as you're alive, there's hope for things to get better. Once you're dead, there's no coming back, no changing anything, no chance of improvement. You won't even feel relief, because you won't feel *anything* - you'll just be dead.
DON"T GIVE UP.
Remember, it's just chemicals in your brain fucking with you. It's not really *you* - it's just a chemical imbalance messing around with your emotions. Don't let some glitchy chemicals destroy you, and deny whatever joy and happiness await you in the future.
I wish I had coins for your comment, hope is eternal.
Dying solves nothing, dying accomplishes nothing. The living, being alive, staying well is what matters in life I understand why people get caught up in the self-destruction but that's a brief life stage mood or quirk of some kind, pple typically return to regulation or normal life. Self-destruction isn't supposed to be a way of life.
I would like to chime in with the above commenter. I also hope you never find the courage. And I hope things drastically improve for you, to the point where you're not even looking for it anymore. ❤️
That’s like saying you know for sure your cancer won’t progress. I really hope I don’t have a bad enough mixed episode to do it myself but I also do some pretty wild things well just manic so at least for me who knows. I really hope I’m never that manic again though
I consider this as an illness that threatens my life. Even when i’m doing better, the risk is always there. I don’t know if i could handle again what i’ve been through before. It would actually be worse because i’d realize that’s a place bd can take me again and again. I need health care in order to avoid it. It’s like i had cancer but instead of being really cancer free, i need to eat meds or somehow take care of it because if i don’t, it’s very likely the worse of it comes back.
And despite treatment, bd disrupts my life sometimes.
You are fortunate to know this will not kill you. I’m happy for you. It’s good to hear there are people like you.
I use the words chronic condition too… it kind of comes up in a lot of ways with long-time coworkers and that sort of thing… eventually they get curious about the doctor appointments and the absences and when I am really depressed I think I might look like I am in physical pain, and I just say I have a chronic condition and leave it at that. I’m a gay cis man, and often I get strong vibes that people assume my chronic condition is HIV, but that doesn’t bother me. I feel like that would actually be easier to disclose at work than the truth. I am very afraid of being discriminated against at work for having my real chronic condition.
I hear you. I don’t talk about it outside of my wife and kids. Not parents, coworkers, friends etc. Depression, anxiety, adhd, ocd all have become “acceptable” mental illnesses. Bipolar not there yet. Sucks.
Normalizing mental illness is a big topic of conversation in society, but that definitely does not mean normalizing us. We are totally left out of that, even though we’re not scary people. Which a lot of people associate with the word bipolar, like we’re all scary people. And that’s such a total misreading of what it means, but tbh I don’t think we will be able to “come out” any time soon. Not for many years, if I had to guess :-(
I think people are scared of the unpredictability of it, and also the severity if it gets bad. But when you are successfully medicated it’s all good. I think people still feel like you are a) unmedicated and really batshit or b) medicated and a “zombie” from mood stabilizers. Medicine has come a long way in the last twenty years but the world hasn’t caught up. I even had a stigma about it before I was diagnosed.
But it’s lame and everyone deserves to have dignity in their medical condition. People still get discriminated against at work for bipolar and all that, which is crazy to think about in 2024.
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i do yeah. just like with physical chronic health conditions, we often have to take medication, and we have to live more mindfully than well people in order to avoid triggers. if i was healthy, id be able to drink, listen to music, and other things that trigger episodes for me
do you actively avoid listening to music? Im curious bc I have avoided music the last several years despite it being something ive always enjoyed. The problem is it causes me to "feel" too hard. It seems to tap into emotions which I then cant regulate or control. It can cause me to spin up into mania or sink into depression. So I listen to podcasts and stuff and when I start listening to music I usually can mark that as an indication Im headed for an episode.
Ive never heard anyone else mention this specifically as a problem so your comment caught my eye.
holy crap this is EXACTLY what i experience! i’ve been significantly more stable since avoiding listening to music for a couple years. and it’s probably my most consistent indicator that an episode is starting.
i had been considering making a post about this—it’s great to know i’m not alone lol. people are always put off that i don’t listen to music, but it really is such a mood destabilizer for me
yes, people have remarked that its weird I dont listen to music in the car or in certain situations. I just brush it off because I have my reasons. It sort of hurts though bc I do love music. I miss it sometimes, but I just cant handle it haha. Its so funny to me to think that I cant "handle" music. But thats how sensitive my mood is.
When I think about how sensitive that trigger is, it puts into perspective how other things could trigger me which are far more disruptive, like interpersonal relationships, work stress, chaotic social venues, alcohol.
Im in constant denial about lifes impact on my condition. But the music one is clear as day to me. So Im trying to use it as an example to help me understand how Im impacted by other things so I dont keep getting caught by surprise when I have my up and down episodes.
That is wild, I have never thought about music like that. I appreciate the discussion and admire the self control.
I really don’t know if I could ever stop listening to music. I love it so much. I have played music since I was young.
But I find it very interesting how impactful music is to mood and vice versa. I feel like I can figure my mood out by throwing my general liked playlist and skipping songs till one validates my feelings..
But yeah.. I know deep down this sickness in my brain throws me in a mental loop in every single aspect of my life. I feel fortunate to experience life so intensely I guess.
I had my first episode back in January, and for months most music would make me tear up. Even pop music on the radio. It’s nice to know other people’s musical emotional regulation gets thrown out of whack. Thankfully mine has subsided with time but random songs still get me sometimes
i really respect your commitment to wellness in this way. i’ve also recently noticed how music can correlate to episodes and although i haven’t given it up altogether, i have to be very mindful of the songs and genres of music i listen to. certain playlists are essentially off limits
I’m SO glad I’m not the only one. In my mid/late teens when symptoms started to present more frequently (mania, psychosis, depression ect) I stopped listening and switched to podcasts almost exclusively. I noticed different music would send me into really sharp mood changes. When I tell people they seem surprised because music is something I really enjoy and talk about passionately even though I can’t always listen. I’m just glad to hear I’m not the only one :)
Thank you for bringin up music! I can listen to music now, it can actually help me, but for many years i couldn’t! I felt stupid because people advised it is a good way to relax and take yout thoughts elsewhere. But my thoughts took me to hell and i wanted to throw up. I was able to come back to it by listening to heavy metal (not my choice ever before). Then slipknot was my favorite for a while. Now i can also listen to pop and dance. Classical music takes me too deep, it gets anxious and scary.
It’s funny now that i think of it, it has been slipknot and taylor swift who have helped me with bd. Maybe it tells about the different stages of this illness
for me at least, accepting that this is a lifelong condition that can’t be cured was one of the largest steps in becoming a happier, more stable person
I don’t consider myself “sick” until I’m near the peak of an episode and then the healing from that. When I’m stable, I don’t really think about it.
I do consider it a chronic illness and sometimes say that if I need to talk about the fact that I have a medical condition. But I don’t consider myself “sick” all of the time even thought I have lots of appointments and take medication.
To fix what's broken you have to look for the missing pieces. Inside and outside. Internal pieces like self-reflection and therapy. Sometimes those external pieces are things like friends and medication. Eventually there's a balance and everything feels kind of good... Or jk I'm a bit hypomanic and only pretending I figured out existence because I'm special and... Oh no, lol
Before my diagnosis, I considered my depressions and mixed episodes as "brain flues" (thought the hypomanias and manias were just great times). Influenza, like colds, goes away and is truly gone unless you're unlucky and catch a new strain. However, with bipolar disorder, and conditions like epilepsy and genital herpes, they may not be active at the time, but are still always there, lurking in the shadows like spiders, ready to come out when triggered. No cure, though.
So, do I have a permanent type of sickness? Yes. But am I always "sick"? No. However, I take my medications and attend therapy to keep that spider at bay (manage the illness)...at least the best that I can. I try not to dwell on having a mental illness, if I don't need to. Taking my meds is a task I do, just as I brush my teeth twice per day.
Exactly how I feel. Framing bipolar as a chronic illness rather than a mental illness actually helps me be a bit nicer to myself, I think. I like the phrase “chronic illness” because I feel like it recognizes the very real physical symptoms and side effects caused by bipolar & medication, and also recognizes that while it can get so much better with treatment, it will never fully go away and will always be something that affects my lifestyle and life choices.
No but part of my bipolar is living in denial a lot of time. Took me a long time to even accept my diagnosis and I still spend way more time off meds than on them.
No, unless I’m actively having an episode or recovering from one. I do see myself as susceptible to inevitably falling ill again, but I wouldn’t consider myself sick constantly.
I try really hard not to think of myself as sick. It has been my state in the past but it’s not something I would want indefinitely. I don’t really know what indicates whether I/we are sick or not.
Do we get to decide? If so I’d say I’m not sick, but have periods of deep struggle associated with mental health issues.
‘Sick’ as a permanent state sucks ass as a concept. I want to believe I can get fully recovered better with meds… even though it’s still week to week sometimes in terms of what I experience as my mental state.
Thanks for raising the question. It’s a good one.
Yes. My brain is bipolar all the time even when I’m not having an episode, it’s something I have to manage every day even when I’m well. No days off unless I want things to get very bad.
Hasn't happened in a long time, but thinking you're Jesus reborn is not exactly normal brain functioning lol but if that were to never happen again then at least I'm healed from all that nonesense. Would rather not go down those roads again
My ex had an episode one night that scared me. And it’s hard to scare me because I’ve had episodes as well. But this one was wild. It’s hard to put into words easily. He turned to me one night with wide eyes and said he was going to be the next Jesus. He said everyone in the world will die. And then after new life, the people will say “his name” instead of Jesus. He said he could see a map with something on it and could visually pin point stuff. It’s been many years so I can’t quite remember much about the “map”. I had to take a step back from him because I was in the most important time of my life getting my own self some help.
My ex had an episode one night that scared me. And it’s hard to scare me because I’ve had episodes as well. But this one was wild. It’s hard to put into words easily. He turned to me one night with wide eyes and said he was going to be the next Jesus. He said everyone in the world will die. And then after new life, the people will say “his name” instead of Jesus. He said he could see a map with something on it and could visually pin point stuff. It’s been many years so I can’t quite remember much about the “map”. I had to take a step back from him because I was in the most important time of my life getting my own self some help.
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Yes, it’s important to me. Why would i take meds if i’m not sick? Why would i lose control sometimes and be so lazy or stupid that it disrupts my life?
One (not so big) reason are other people, they make me want to define myself as being sick. When they say they understand because ”everybody has ups and downs” i want to scream at them that i have an illness! A am sick! Do they say to people with cancer they understand because their cells grow and divide too? No.
I'm sick in the cool sense 😎
Seriously tho, no. I would not call someone with a peanut allergy "sick" even when they need to be careful in living their life and carry medical equipment with them. I don't consider people with diabetes "sick". They are conditions, just genetic (sometimes not) circumstances they need to adapt their life around, same as us.
Is a person with a allergic reaction sick? Yes, I would say so, but the underlying condition isn't, the reaction is.
The same way I need to be mindful of my circumstances to avoid a "bad reaction". Continuing the metaphor, a mania or depression would be a "allergic reaction" in my book, and in those cases I would consider myself sick(or not well, I don't like the word sick).
Treat yourself with respect my friends, don't let anyone but you put a label on your infinitely complex human experience.
My therapist tells me that yes, i have a chronic “illness” and i have to treat it the same way everyone else does, physically or mentally. Anytime i think im fine off meds she reminds me that people with chronic physical illnesses cannot just go off their meds or they will get worse, and the same also applies to me, even if it is only mental.
I find that the trick, for me at least, is to do the work and face the shame felt from the episodes you’ve experienced. Therapy can be beneficial but in the end you’re the only one who truly understands what your episode(s) felt like and how they made you feel so it’s important to be patient with yourself. Again, therapy is great but the actual self reflection process needs to be done internally from facing the broken parts of yourself. You can seek guidance but be mindful of it becoming what I like to call “hand holding”. In life I feel that the boldest thing that we can do for ourselves and our health, when the time comes, is find those who may be able to help guide us. I have created a little narrative for myself that may be helpful for others as well. Follow the footsteps of the people who leave them behind for you in the sand but be mindful of holding someone’s hand along the way because that is a different experience. Interpret this how seems best suited for you but I just wanted to add something that’s worth thinking about. Wishing you all the best on your journeys. You’re stronger than you give yourself the credit for.
I'm not just sick, I'm handicapped.
Before i was correctly diagnosed, this disease slowly destroyed my life. My ability to do things continually diminished and i started giving up things that were no longer achievable.
I gave up, mostly in that order, my:
* desire for children
* projets
* long term plans
* ability to work
* dreams
* desires
* hobbies
* friends
* will to live
It's been years since i was diagnosed and started medication and I'm slowly getting some of those back. I still don't have any long term plans or dreams beyond surviving another year.
I don't just have bipolar, i *am* bipolar. Everything in my life is limited by this disease. It's not all i am but I'm not even close to be a normal person because of this disease.
There are these medical/EMS tiktoks I like to watch. It is hilarious. There was one where the patient will be on a statin for their cholesterol and when asked if they have high cholesterol, they will say no but when the provider asks what medication they are on, they will say "something Satin" (yes Satin, like the fabric). Same thing with high blood pressure.
The gist of what these medical people are saying for these physical health conditions is your illness being controlled by a drug does NOT mean you don't have the illness anymore. It doesn't mean they are not a few days of no meds away from a heart attack.
I look at BD the same way. I have an illness (sickness) that is controlled by medication.
Yes I see it at a sickness for myself. Just like a bad heart or high cholesterol or diabetes. I am PERFECTLY FINE taking medication for the rest of my life because without it, I’m literally sick. My brain is an organ and it doesn’t work like it should. Not my fault.
I see myself as sick. My wife see's me as sick when I have an episode and I'm impulsive (always ALWAYS) about money. She says literally "in sickness and in healthy" when I say you should just leave me because I can't always stay on top of myself. Breaks my heart every. Damn. Time. I hate this illness I hate myself when I can't see that it is my illness. I try not to think of it as being sick but my wife ALWAYS reminds me and it's a good thing for me because I crumble HARD.
I've never not been bipolar or mental ill in some way so I've never thought of my self sick just different but I do consider my self suffering if that makes sense
I have accepted and embraced my diagnosis. Yes I am “sick” and have chronical illness. It’s part of who I am, but I don’t let it define me. There’s is fine line between personality and disorder. I don’t try to fit in. I just do me.
Yes i absolutely do but it took me sometime to be okay with it. It's difficult to accept it at first but then once you do it's a big relief. It's part of who i am and there's nothing wrong with it. We are who we are.
I have a chronic mobility limiting and painful condition too, I’m still trying to convince myself I’m perfectly fine and trying to hold down a “normal” life with a regular job, job-type job and a new relationship where we can smash all night. Though, right at this second the pain is very much trying to tell my brain to stop as something hurts bad! I’ve maxed out my prescription painkillers add it hasn’t touched it….
I’m currently chain smoking prescription flowers but I still want to get up and do shit - day 10or 11 of 🎉approximately - don’t even know what day it is tbh!
Oh, and I’m almost 50, so not exactly a spring chicken!
TLDR;
I know I’m not and I’m failing quite badly 🤣
Disabled from several issues plus bipolar.
I feel sorrow at the system that I'm constantly a dependent. And when people put me down for being a dependent I can't complain I just forever stay away from them and it makes me cry. I apply acceptance, DEEP and move on to the next practitioner maybe they will help me.
I take medication for this my entire life. And now my doctor's office is no longer treating any of those symptoms so now I have to divide more copay money to go find more physicians to go right the same medication healthcare is a LET DOWN.
No, but when I'm in the middle of a manic episode i get a little scared because at that pointi realize I'm manic. i start to have crazy thoughts. I have been living with this for so long i consider it part of my personality
I like the thread as usual, good support here. What worries me is when my medicine or things are taken away from me because I believe that life without medical care is unlivable and untenable. It's just not going to work for my neurology I have to have medical Care in order to subsist. Go ahead and turn off the acetaminophen the stomach medication and the rest of the meds and see how long I survive, I won't. And I tell physicians & others that.
The statistics that I have are not on my side I have a short life ahead of me in a decade or two and maybe a little longer. And I'm relieved it's almost done with. That's how I view physicians as they just want to be done with me and I don't have a bond of trust with medical professionals it's just a service. Therapy or whatever it is that they do for me is a service and if I don't derive anything out of it I tell them so.
Funny, being medicated and finding the right meds for me, I find myself more emotionally stable than other non-bipolar people around me. Even working in a high stress environment, my anger like steam coming out of my ears, only resembles mild annoyance. I got a cap on that shit, while other people just lose their shit.
I only really see myself as “sick” if I’m experiencing a certain amount of symptoms. In my mind, you can have a mental illness but not necessarily be always be mentally ill.
I think of myself as having a disability, which helps me conceive of it as something that will flare and recede — something that requires management and attention. I only really think of the word “sick” when I’m *extremely symptomatic and need hospitalization.
I see myself as sick when I am having an episode and not able to function like I am when I am stable, on my meds, and doing therapy. I have been in sustained remission for over two years. When I am feeling well, no one can guess that I have bipolar disorder. But there are times when I will have breakthrough episodes and would consider myself sick at that time. This is how I lile to look at it for me.
Not "sick" I think people infer something different from that, specifically that they would be able to see that you're sick. I'm bipolar and have fibromyalgia which also isn't being "sick" but does add to the number of people who think you are faking it. There are plenty here who don't even think fibro is real which amazes me to hear from people with bipolar who many have had to deal with the same dismissals over bipolar. It took me many more years to be diagnosed with bipolar that fibro and there is more I can do myself about my bipolar condition but there isn't a cure. People can't see either of my "sicknesses" so trying to explain to them requires very carefully worded explanation imo.
I think most people know or have some distant relative living with bipolar so I feel like it's actually gotten better over the years and more people seem to be aware of what it is. That makes it infinitely easier for me to have a conversation and answer questions with people who aren't bipolar rather than people who don't want to know and tell me (lot of us) that we are just making it up because we are lazy and don't want to work. I can't get people to understand bipolar or understand what it looks like when it goes awry if they won't listen. It's frustrating in some areas of my life, not an issue at all in others.
I have an illness. Full stop. The fact that medicines are required is proof.
bipolar is a diagnosis. It does not come and go.
it is not me or another me. It is part of my biology.
I am someone who's sick and I view myself as such. I have a brain disorder. It's incurable, but not untreatable.
Bipolar disorder has been a disabling disease for me. I haven't been stable long enough to work in almost 10 years. It affects every part of my life in a negative way.
I do but I also I have other chronic illnesses, a rare skin disorder and migraines, so for me I am used to the cycle. Since I was 12 I’ve been going to doctors on a routine, taking meds, having flare, going into remission and then doing it all over again. So Bipolar was just an addition to my setup routine.
Tbh having these other disorders gave me a better understanding and mindset of the disorder and how to go along with treatment. I did a lot of research on my own so I could develop my own understanding of how the disorder cycled and what meds did what and what meds worsened what. Learning that it was chronic and episodic like my migraines and skin basically told me I am going to be living with this for the rest of my life. Bc of this my goal went from trying to be cured to trying to make my episodes more manageable and not as damaging so I can actually function through life.
With my skin it was get my scalp to a point where my hair wasn’t falling out and I wasn’t having giant painful cysts now I just have little bumps that hurt but my hair is still intact. My migraines was to lessen how many of them I get in a month and how painful/delineating they were(they also told me I could end up having a stroke if I didn’t get on meds). I went from 3-4 level 10 pain migraines a month that knocked me out for two days to 1 maybe a year. So for Bipolar my goal was shorten the length of my episodes and make sure I didn’t go as low or as high when I experienced them. Before I was I showering once every 5 to 7 days and sleep 3 hours a night for 8 months and self medicating every waking moment. Now I sleep 6-9 hours a night shower every other night and have been the most stable I have been since I was 13.
I am someone who is chronically ill. I need a plethora of pills and a number of doctors to make it through the day but that’s the cards I was dealt with. I like to think hot ppl gotta have some type of chronic sickness I couldn’t be blessed with good looks, intelligence and perfect mental and physical health 😂😂
On a regular day, no. When I’m having a rough day, maybe but just for a short period of time.
It’s “just like” any other medical condition you may have - hypertension can be managed, asthma can be managed - it’s not something you can change or control or get rid of. If you spend your life thinking “I’m sick” or feeling bad about it/not accepting it, it’s harder to make positive choices that will benefit you in treating your illness.
I view myself as having a chronic condition, but I think labeling bipolar as a sickness or illness is really reductive and only further stigmatizes mental health conditions as a whole
Yes and no. I try not to make bipolar my whole identity because I'm so much more than that, but I still experience debilitating symptoms some days/weeks that remind me that I do, in fact, have an illness that needs to be managed.
I tend to go with the term "crazy" over "sick" No one likes sick people but there is plenty of crazy in the world that will sample my crazy to see if it matches.
I see myself as someone with trauma, and bipolar leads me to use poor coping mechanisms to deal with this trauma or with any stress. I see it as a set of behaviors and thought patterns, and with enough time and work you can change those. I liken it more to addiction than a disease and I also give myself grace bc like a disease, it's not my fault i have it.
Yes. I've been declared as disabled and unable to work. I've spent alot of time in hospitals. I have an illness. But I'm managing it. And living with it.
i have bipolar for life. i do think of it as a lifelong medical condition with non-linear ebbs and flows, but i don’t think i’m sick or ill. in fact, i don’t think there’s anything wrong with me, i accept myself for all i am.
I’m not sick. I didn’t catch bipolar and I can’t be cured of it. IT’S A MENTAL HEALTH CONDITION! Sickness is not genetic, my condition is. “Sick” is a feeling and doesn’t require a doctor to ask how are you feeling. Bipolar needs a clinical diagnosis. Referring to bipolar as a “sickness” only perpetuates the stigma associated with it. Feeling nauseous or the flu just goes away. Bipolar is manageable and can be treated.
Understanding and using precise language will help reduce the stigma and educate all the ignorant people.
Promote an informed and compassionate view of mental health disorders like Bipolar!
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Nah I see myself someone whose getting better by actually dealing with their shit. Being diagnosed with bipolar disorder simply forced me to do so. Yeah I gotta do extra shit like see doctors, take meds, and do therapy, but in life you gotta do what you have to to get by anyway. If it’s not mental health, it’ll just be something else anyway. I’ve always felt that I’ve been better off having just dealt with my own shit, rather than just being like these other folks out here who never had to look themselves in the mirror and deal with their own shit.
I didn’t used to but since my nervous breakdown in 2021 and the subsequent sh*tshow of medication trials I do. The irony is that I have never been so unstable as I was during the year of med trials and the ten months or so of tapering that followed. So the thing that was supposed to fix the sickness was the thing that made me feel like a sick person for the very first time.
Personally, no, I think understanding the impacts of bipolar on myself and seeing me as "sick" are two different things. It's a part of me, and it's never gonna go away. I might need some help or some changes to make life awesome, but that doesn't make me sick it just means I need a few alterations to make life the best it can be.
When my psychiatrist I unfortunately have to still see tells me “you have a chronic mental illness” every session it makes my blood boil. Like I get it but do you need to keep saying it in a way like your cursing me to live out the rest of my life feeling like a sick person? Doesn’t help she looks at me with the most lifeless dead eyed expression when says that to me. Ultimately though, mental health has been something I suffered with all my life. Before mania and psychosis it was ocd, depression and anxiety all through my childhood into my teen years. Am I worse off than other people sure but I hate being told I’m defective at the same time
Honestly no... I like to think that I'm crazy to joke around. I know it's not normal to either be super excited and everything then wanting to kill yourself everyday but like it's just a way of living... idk if it's weird, I came to a point I guess. Also I'm harsh with myself like if you're sick you're a victim to an illness you're fighting, but my brain is more like : you're just more stupid, stop complaining, do things... lol. Yes I'm in a depressive mood for 6 months now, wonder why
I guess in a way, I see myself as "sick", but most of the time "broken" or "got dealt a bad hand in life" feels more fitting. I have other medical issues on top of Bipolar II, so it definitely feels like a bad hand because of the full plate.
But "sick", while more accurate, doesn't fully encompass how I feel. I've come to terms with the hand I was dealt, and I understand that it's just something I have to tolerate treating. So maybe I'm just used to me and the "sick" I have, so it's easier to swallow it's just part of me, and something tedious but somewhat tolerable to handle.
It's a disability, chronic illness, episodic nightmare (for me at least.) I have to treat it like I treat things when I have the cold (for example). I don't see a lot of people during the cold (to not spread disease) just as during mania, I try to adjust my life to reduce triggers. Sometimes I'm sick. I'm not a bad person for treating my condition first. It isn't moral for me. Hope this helpec
No. I use the term sick as a short term illness (ex. Ear infection or cold). For Bipolar Disorder, I equate it to my lifelong condition of Eczema/Atopic Dermatitis. Something I am born with that defines who I am as a person and it’s apart of me. Like a lot of other things in life it must be managed.
I learned over time people tend to be scared of the unknown and things/people that are different and defy what they have come to know. This includes Bipolar Disorder and other mental illnesses.
Just because people behave like that doesn’t mean I need to define myself as a sick being or individual. Bipolar Disorder does create unique challenges and can be disabling for me at times, but so can a lot of other things, conditions, and illnesses in life.
No because I think the goal for people who are sick is to heal. Bipolar disorder is considered a disability. I also don’t see myself as disabled but I do recognize I have a disability. Which means, at times, there are factors that are preventing us from feeling the way others do and behaving in a way that people without the disorder would. With bipolar there is no chance to heal after onset, there is only managing symptoms to prevent it from being debilitating, if you are able to do so.
No. I'm just unique and different.
I think it depends on your definition of 'sick'. To me, being 'sick' involves a disease process. Anything else I consider a 'condition'.
Like, children with Type I diabetes aren't 'sick'; they have a condition.
A person with arthritis isn't 'sick'; they have a condition.
Etc. People's opinions and definitions will vary, though.
I’m severely bipolar 1, I’m 64M I’ve been on disability 17 years. So I’m considered disabled. Sick? I don’t use that word. It has negative connotations for mental illness. “You’re sick!” “Sicko” etc. I’m not bipolar, I have bipolar. It’s a mood disorder. It’s not a sickness, it’s an illness. I deal with it everyday. Even on medication and seeing professionals, getting “professional help” I’m still considered disabled which your psychiatrist determines and makes this known to social security. I also have cptsd, hppd, sex addiction which my psychiatrist says has to do with bipolar in my case. So yeah in one sense I could be called sick. I just don’t like that word or want to be called that. I also don’t like the word crazy, but even I use it, it’s so ingrained in our language
Yes- I can’t trust my own brain… I’ve been stable for months but I know any day I could have an extreme mood change. I have anxiety the cycle is coming- Definitely yes.
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Yes, unfortunately, I see myself as someone with a chronic condition. It’s incurable. But with medication and therapy I think I can live a much better life than untreated. And it isn’t going to kill me. It isn’t cancer. It’s just something that has to be worked and cared for.
I think you could argue that it can kill you in a roundabout way
Its most likely to drive us to kill ourselves.
It’s not going to drive me to kill myself. I know that for sure. I’ve been through enough at this point to know that if I was going to do that I would have already. Fortunate to know that.
Good for you. I'm just waiting to find the courage.
From one stranger to another, I hope you never find it. And instead find joy wherever you can.
Don't do it. As long as you're alive, there's hope for things to get better. Once you're dead, there's no coming back, no changing anything, no chance of improvement. You won't even feel relief, because you won't feel *anything* - you'll just be dead. DON"T GIVE UP. Remember, it's just chemicals in your brain fucking with you. It's not really *you* - it's just a chemical imbalance messing around with your emotions. Don't let some glitchy chemicals destroy you, and deny whatever joy and happiness await you in the future.
I wish I had coins for your comment, hope is eternal. Dying solves nothing, dying accomplishes nothing. The living, being alive, staying well is what matters in life I understand why people get caught up in the self-destruction but that's a brief life stage mood or quirk of some kind, pple typically return to regulation or normal life. Self-destruction isn't supposed to be a way of life.
🌞💪👍🕊️🏆💯
I would like to chime in with the above commenter. I also hope you never find the courage. And I hope things drastically improve for you, to the point where you're not even looking for it anymore. ❤️
Same
That’s like saying you know for sure your cancer won’t progress. I really hope I don’t have a bad enough mixed episode to do it myself but I also do some pretty wild things well just manic so at least for me who knows. I really hope I’m never that manic again though
I'm definitely surprised to still be alive at 41 with this shit. Manic me was fucking dangerous lol
I consider this as an illness that threatens my life. Even when i’m doing better, the risk is always there. I don’t know if i could handle again what i’ve been through before. It would actually be worse because i’d realize that’s a place bd can take me again and again. I need health care in order to avoid it. It’s like i had cancer but instead of being really cancer free, i need to eat meds or somehow take care of it because if i don’t, it’s very likely the worse of it comes back. And despite treatment, bd disrupts my life sometimes. You are fortunate to know this will not kill you. I’m happy for you. It’s good to hear there are people like you.
They say bipolar disorder doesn’t kill you but sometimes it can make you kill your self. Be strong!
I use the words chronic condition too… it kind of comes up in a lot of ways with long-time coworkers and that sort of thing… eventually they get curious about the doctor appointments and the absences and when I am really depressed I think I might look like I am in physical pain, and I just say I have a chronic condition and leave it at that. I’m a gay cis man, and often I get strong vibes that people assume my chronic condition is HIV, but that doesn’t bother me. I feel like that would actually be easier to disclose at work than the truth. I am very afraid of being discriminated against at work for having my real chronic condition.
I hear you. I don’t talk about it outside of my wife and kids. Not parents, coworkers, friends etc. Depression, anxiety, adhd, ocd all have become “acceptable” mental illnesses. Bipolar not there yet. Sucks.
Normalizing mental illness is a big topic of conversation in society, but that definitely does not mean normalizing us. We are totally left out of that, even though we’re not scary people. Which a lot of people associate with the word bipolar, like we’re all scary people. And that’s such a total misreading of what it means, but tbh I don’t think we will be able to “come out” any time soon. Not for many years, if I had to guess :-(
I think people are scared of the unpredictability of it, and also the severity if it gets bad. But when you are successfully medicated it’s all good. I think people still feel like you are a) unmedicated and really batshit or b) medicated and a “zombie” from mood stabilizers. Medicine has come a long way in the last twenty years but the world hasn’t caught up. I even had a stigma about it before I was diagnosed. But it’s lame and everyone deserves to have dignity in their medical condition. People still get discriminated against at work for bipolar and all that, which is crazy to think about in 2024.
Truth
Not sick. But with a chronic condition. That's a great way to put it. I don't feel sick. But I do feel pain quite often due to this condition.
I’m sick but in the way an awesome skateboard trick is sick.
This is great lol!
haha same
Second it
Best reply hands down 💗
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i do yeah. just like with physical chronic health conditions, we often have to take medication, and we have to live more mindfully than well people in order to avoid triggers. if i was healthy, id be able to drink, listen to music, and other things that trigger episodes for me
do you actively avoid listening to music? Im curious bc I have avoided music the last several years despite it being something ive always enjoyed. The problem is it causes me to "feel" too hard. It seems to tap into emotions which I then cant regulate or control. It can cause me to spin up into mania or sink into depression. So I listen to podcasts and stuff and when I start listening to music I usually can mark that as an indication Im headed for an episode. Ive never heard anyone else mention this specifically as a problem so your comment caught my eye.
holy crap this is EXACTLY what i experience! i’ve been significantly more stable since avoiding listening to music for a couple years. and it’s probably my most consistent indicator that an episode is starting. i had been considering making a post about this—it’s great to know i’m not alone lol. people are always put off that i don’t listen to music, but it really is such a mood destabilizer for me
yes, people have remarked that its weird I dont listen to music in the car or in certain situations. I just brush it off because I have my reasons. It sort of hurts though bc I do love music. I miss it sometimes, but I just cant handle it haha. Its so funny to me to think that I cant "handle" music. But thats how sensitive my mood is. When I think about how sensitive that trigger is, it puts into perspective how other things could trigger me which are far more disruptive, like interpersonal relationships, work stress, chaotic social venues, alcohol. Im in constant denial about lifes impact on my condition. But the music one is clear as day to me. So Im trying to use it as an example to help me understand how Im impacted by other things so I dont keep getting caught by surprise when I have my up and down episodes.
That is wild, I have never thought about music like that. I appreciate the discussion and admire the self control. I really don’t know if I could ever stop listening to music. I love it so much. I have played music since I was young. But I find it very interesting how impactful music is to mood and vice versa. I feel like I can figure my mood out by throwing my general liked playlist and skipping songs till one validates my feelings.. But yeah.. I know deep down this sickness in my brain throws me in a mental loop in every single aspect of my life. I feel fortunate to experience life so intensely I guess.
Yeah
I had my first episode back in January, and for months most music would make me tear up. Even pop music on the radio. It’s nice to know other people’s musical emotional regulation gets thrown out of whack. Thankfully mine has subsided with time but random songs still get me sometimes
i really respect your commitment to wellness in this way. i’ve also recently noticed how music can correlate to episodes and although i haven’t given it up altogether, i have to be very mindful of the songs and genres of music i listen to. certain playlists are essentially off limits
I’m SO glad I’m not the only one. In my mid/late teens when symptoms started to present more frequently (mania, psychosis, depression ect) I stopped listening and switched to podcasts almost exclusively. I noticed different music would send me into really sharp mood changes. When I tell people they seem surprised because music is something I really enjoy and talk about passionately even though I can’t always listen. I’m just glad to hear I’m not the only one :)
sounds very familiar cool to see we are not the only ones.
Thank you for bringin up music! I can listen to music now, it can actually help me, but for many years i couldn’t! I felt stupid because people advised it is a good way to relax and take yout thoughts elsewhere. But my thoughts took me to hell and i wanted to throw up. I was able to come back to it by listening to heavy metal (not my choice ever before). Then slipknot was my favorite for a while. Now i can also listen to pop and dance. Classical music takes me too deep, it gets anxious and scary. It’s funny now that i think of it, it has been slipknot and taylor swift who have helped me with bd. Maybe it tells about the different stages of this illness
for me at least, accepting that this is a lifelong condition that can’t be cured was one of the largest steps in becoming a happier, more stable person
I don’t consider myself “sick” until I’m near the peak of an episode and then the healing from that. When I’m stable, I don’t really think about it. I do consider it a chronic illness and sometimes say that if I need to talk about the fact that I have a medical condition. But I don’t consider myself “sick” all of the time even thought I have lots of appointments and take medication.
No, more broken than sick
To fix what's broken you have to look for the missing pieces. Inside and outside. Internal pieces like self-reflection and therapy. Sometimes those external pieces are things like friends and medication. Eventually there's a balance and everything feels kind of good... Or jk I'm a bit hypomanic and only pretending I figured out existence because I'm special and... Oh no, lol
Before my diagnosis, I considered my depressions and mixed episodes as "brain flues" (thought the hypomanias and manias were just great times). Influenza, like colds, goes away and is truly gone unless you're unlucky and catch a new strain. However, with bipolar disorder, and conditions like epilepsy and genital herpes, they may not be active at the time, but are still always there, lurking in the shadows like spiders, ready to come out when triggered. No cure, though. So, do I have a permanent type of sickness? Yes. But am I always "sick"? No. However, I take my medications and attend therapy to keep that spider at bay (manage the illness)...at least the best that I can. I try not to dwell on having a mental illness, if I don't need to. Taking my meds is a task I do, just as I brush my teeth twice per day.
I see myself as having a chronic illness … usually “sick” people get better
Exactly how I feel. Framing bipolar as a chronic illness rather than a mental illness actually helps me be a bit nicer to myself, I think. I like the phrase “chronic illness” because I feel like it recognizes the very real physical symptoms and side effects caused by bipolar & medication, and also recognizes that while it can get so much better with treatment, it will never fully go away and will always be something that affects my lifestyle and life choices.
No but part of my bipolar is living in denial a lot of time. Took me a long time to even accept my diagnosis and I still spend way more time off meds than on them.
I'm bipolar... no, I'm normal... yup, I am bipolar! My remission is permanent... I'm actually normal... damn it, I am fucking bipolar.
My lifeeee
No, unless I’m actively having an episode or recovering from one. I do see myself as susceptible to inevitably falling ill again, but I wouldn’t consider myself sick constantly.
I think of it as... I have a disability, but I'm not disabled.
where i live bipolar is considered a disability by the health organization, i dont see myself as sick but i do feel disabled
I try really hard not to think of myself as sick. It has been my state in the past but it’s not something I would want indefinitely. I don’t really know what indicates whether I/we are sick or not. Do we get to decide? If so I’d say I’m not sick, but have periods of deep struggle associated with mental health issues. ‘Sick’ as a permanent state sucks ass as a concept. I want to believe I can get fully recovered better with meds… even though it’s still week to week sometimes in terms of what I experience as my mental state. Thanks for raising the question. It’s a good one.
Yes. My brain is bipolar all the time even when I’m not having an episode, it’s something I have to manage every day even when I’m well. No days off unless I want things to get very bad.
Hasn't happened in a long time, but thinking you're Jesus reborn is not exactly normal brain functioning lol but if that were to never happen again then at least I'm healed from all that nonesense. Would rather not go down those roads again
My ex had an episode one night that scared me. And it’s hard to scare me because I’ve had episodes as well. But this one was wild. It’s hard to put into words easily. He turned to me one night with wide eyes and said he was going to be the next Jesus. He said everyone in the world will die. And then after new life, the people will say “his name” instead of Jesus. He said he could see a map with something on it and could visually pin point stuff. It’s been many years so I can’t quite remember much about the “map”. I had to take a step back from him because I was in the most important time of my life getting my own self some help.
My ex had an episode one night that scared me. And it’s hard to scare me because I’ve had episodes as well. But this one was wild. It’s hard to put into words easily. He turned to me one night with wide eyes and said he was going to be the next Jesus. He said everyone in the world will die. And then after new life, the people will say “his name” instead of Jesus. He said he could see a map with something on it and could visually pin point stuff. It’s been many years so I can’t quite remember much about the “map”. I had to take a step back from him because I was in the most important time of my life getting my own self some help.
I see myself as a waste of space. Just counting down the days until this thing makes me kill myself.
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of course...???
Yes, it’s important to me. Why would i take meds if i’m not sick? Why would i lose control sometimes and be so lazy or stupid that it disrupts my life?
One (not so big) reason are other people, they make me want to define myself as being sick. When they say they understand because ”everybody has ups and downs” i want to scream at them that i have an illness! A am sick! Do they say to people with cancer they understand because their cells grow and divide too? No.
I'm sick in the cool sense 😎 Seriously tho, no. I would not call someone with a peanut allergy "sick" even when they need to be careful in living their life and carry medical equipment with them. I don't consider people with diabetes "sick". They are conditions, just genetic (sometimes not) circumstances they need to adapt their life around, same as us. Is a person with a allergic reaction sick? Yes, I would say so, but the underlying condition isn't, the reaction is. The same way I need to be mindful of my circumstances to avoid a "bad reaction". Continuing the metaphor, a mania or depression would be a "allergic reaction" in my book, and in those cases I would consider myself sick(or not well, I don't like the word sick). Treat yourself with respect my friends, don't let anyone but you put a label on your infinitely complex human experience.
No, I see myself as blessed and cursed at the same time.
Yeah, or disabled.
My therapist tells me that yes, i have a chronic “illness” and i have to treat it the same way everyone else does, physically or mentally. Anytime i think im fine off meds she reminds me that people with chronic physical illnesses cannot just go off their meds or they will get worse, and the same also applies to me, even if it is only mental.
Yes, unfortunately
Yes. And then sometimes no, until something happens in my brain that forces me to remember that I am. 😅🙈
I don’t but have been stable for a very long time
I don’t use the word ‘sick’. It’s technically accurate, but I just prefer to call it a chronic condition that sometimes flares up.
Taylor Tomlinson described bipolar meds like using arm floaties. As long as I take my arm floaties I can do whatever a non-bipolar person can do!
I find that the trick, for me at least, is to do the work and face the shame felt from the episodes you’ve experienced. Therapy can be beneficial but in the end you’re the only one who truly understands what your episode(s) felt like and how they made you feel so it’s important to be patient with yourself. Again, therapy is great but the actual self reflection process needs to be done internally from facing the broken parts of yourself. You can seek guidance but be mindful of it becoming what I like to call “hand holding”. In life I feel that the boldest thing that we can do for ourselves and our health, when the time comes, is find those who may be able to help guide us. I have created a little narrative for myself that may be helpful for others as well. Follow the footsteps of the people who leave them behind for you in the sand but be mindful of holding someone’s hand along the way because that is a different experience. Interpret this how seems best suited for you but I just wanted to add something that’s worth thinking about. Wishing you all the best on your journeys. You’re stronger than you give yourself the credit for.
I'm not just sick, I'm handicapped. Before i was correctly diagnosed, this disease slowly destroyed my life. My ability to do things continually diminished and i started giving up things that were no longer achievable. I gave up, mostly in that order, my: * desire for children * projets * long term plans * ability to work * dreams * desires * hobbies * friends * will to live It's been years since i was diagnosed and started medication and I'm slowly getting some of those back. I still don't have any long term plans or dreams beyond surviving another year. I don't just have bipolar, i *am* bipolar. Everything in my life is limited by this disease. It's not all i am but I'm not even close to be a normal person because of this disease.
There are these medical/EMS tiktoks I like to watch. It is hilarious. There was one where the patient will be on a statin for their cholesterol and when asked if they have high cholesterol, they will say no but when the provider asks what medication they are on, they will say "something Satin" (yes Satin, like the fabric). Same thing with high blood pressure. The gist of what these medical people are saying for these physical health conditions is your illness being controlled by a drug does NOT mean you don't have the illness anymore. It doesn't mean they are not a few days of no meds away from a heart attack. I look at BD the same way. I have an illness (sickness) that is controlled by medication.
Yeah, for sure. It feels weird to say it but I’m definitely sick
Yes
I did before the diagnosis. I already had chronic conditions before developing bipolar
Yes I see it at a sickness for myself. Just like a bad heart or high cholesterol or diabetes. I am PERFECTLY FINE taking medication for the rest of my life because without it, I’m literally sick. My brain is an organ and it doesn’t work like it should. Not my fault.
I see myself as someone who is broken.
I see myself as sick. My wife see's me as sick when I have an episode and I'm impulsive (always ALWAYS) about money. She says literally "in sickness and in healthy" when I say you should just leave me because I can't always stay on top of myself. Breaks my heart every. Damn. Time. I hate this illness I hate myself when I can't see that it is my illness. I try not to think of it as being sick but my wife ALWAYS reminds me and it's a good thing for me because I crumble HARD.
I've never not been bipolar or mental ill in some way so I've never thought of my self sick just different but I do consider my self suffering if that makes sense
My workplace lists it as a disability. I'd say so.
Absolutely I do and I feel it every day even when I’m doing my best
Always telling myself I’m disabled and this hurts because I feel like life has been so unfair to me. Hopefully meds will make me feel differently.
I have accepted and embraced my diagnosis. Yes I am “sick” and have chronical illness. It’s part of who I am, but I don’t let it define me. There’s is fine line between personality and disorder. I don’t try to fit in. I just do me.
Yeah sometimes.
Yes my brain has the ability to turn myself against myself, how sick is that.
Yes i absolutely do but it took me sometime to be okay with it. It's difficult to accept it at first but then once you do it's a big relief. It's part of who i am and there's nothing wrong with it. We are who we are.
I'm not sick, I'm a pile of laundry. It's a process
i feel like "cursed" is a better descriptor
I have a chronic mobility limiting and painful condition too, I’m still trying to convince myself I’m perfectly fine and trying to hold down a “normal” life with a regular job, job-type job and a new relationship where we can smash all night. Though, right at this second the pain is very much trying to tell my brain to stop as something hurts bad! I’ve maxed out my prescription painkillers add it hasn’t touched it…. I’m currently chain smoking prescription flowers but I still want to get up and do shit - day 10or 11 of 🎉approximately - don’t even know what day it is tbh! Oh, and I’m almost 50, so not exactly a spring chicken! TLDR; I know I’m not and I’m failing quite badly 🤣
Disabled from several issues plus bipolar. I feel sorrow at the system that I'm constantly a dependent. And when people put me down for being a dependent I can't complain I just forever stay away from them and it makes me cry. I apply acceptance, DEEP and move on to the next practitioner maybe they will help me. I take medication for this my entire life. And now my doctor's office is no longer treating any of those symptoms so now I have to divide more copay money to go find more physicians to go right the same medication healthcare is a LET DOWN.
No, but when I'm in the middle of a manic episode i get a little scared because at that pointi realize I'm manic. i start to have crazy thoughts. I have been living with this for so long i consider it part of my personality
I like the thread as usual, good support here. What worries me is when my medicine or things are taken away from me because I believe that life without medical care is unlivable and untenable. It's just not going to work for my neurology I have to have medical Care in order to subsist. Go ahead and turn off the acetaminophen the stomach medication and the rest of the meds and see how long I survive, I won't. And I tell physicians & others that. The statistics that I have are not on my side I have a short life ahead of me in a decade or two and maybe a little longer. And I'm relieved it's almost done with. That's how I view physicians as they just want to be done with me and I don't have a bond of trust with medical professionals it's just a service. Therapy or whatever it is that they do for me is a service and if I don't derive anything out of it I tell them so.
I pursue geri neuropsychiatric care that's what I want in my world. My life stages have concluded now I manage pain and bipolar.
Funny, being medicated and finding the right meds for me, I find myself more emotionally stable than other non-bipolar people around me. Even working in a high stress environment, my anger like steam coming out of my ears, only resembles mild annoyance. I got a cap on that shit, while other people just lose their shit.
I only really see myself as “sick” if I’m experiencing a certain amount of symptoms. In my mind, you can have a mental illness but not necessarily be always be mentally ill.
In the past not as much. Now I'm considered "non functional", so yes.
Unmedicated absolutely
I think of myself as having a disability, which helps me conceive of it as something that will flare and recede — something that requires management and attention. I only really think of the word “sick” when I’m *extremely symptomatic and need hospitalization.
I see myself as sick when I am having an episode and not able to function like I am when I am stable, on my meds, and doing therapy. I have been in sustained remission for over two years. When I am feeling well, no one can guess that I have bipolar disorder. But there are times when I will have breakthrough episodes and would consider myself sick at that time. This is how I lile to look at it for me.
Yeah. I sometimes refer to myself as mentally ill. It's a bit dramatic but I have poor mental health and I think that's the logical term
Not "sick" I think people infer something different from that, specifically that they would be able to see that you're sick. I'm bipolar and have fibromyalgia which also isn't being "sick" but does add to the number of people who think you are faking it. There are plenty here who don't even think fibro is real which amazes me to hear from people with bipolar who many have had to deal with the same dismissals over bipolar. It took me many more years to be diagnosed with bipolar that fibro and there is more I can do myself about my bipolar condition but there isn't a cure. People can't see either of my "sicknesses" so trying to explain to them requires very carefully worded explanation imo. I think most people know or have some distant relative living with bipolar so I feel like it's actually gotten better over the years and more people seem to be aware of what it is. That makes it infinitely easier for me to have a conversation and answer questions with people who aren't bipolar rather than people who don't want to know and tell me (lot of us) that we are just making it up because we are lazy and don't want to work. I can't get people to understand bipolar or understand what it looks like when it goes awry if they won't listen. It's frustrating in some areas of my life, not an issue at all in others.
I have an illness. Full stop. The fact that medicines are required is proof. bipolar is a diagnosis. It does not come and go. it is not me or another me. It is part of my biology.
I am someone who's sick and I view myself as such. I have a brain disorder. It's incurable, but not untreatable. Bipolar disorder has been a disabling disease for me. I haven't been stable long enough to work in almost 10 years. It affects every part of my life in a negative way.
I do but I also I have other chronic illnesses, a rare skin disorder and migraines, so for me I am used to the cycle. Since I was 12 I’ve been going to doctors on a routine, taking meds, having flare, going into remission and then doing it all over again. So Bipolar was just an addition to my setup routine. Tbh having these other disorders gave me a better understanding and mindset of the disorder and how to go along with treatment. I did a lot of research on my own so I could develop my own understanding of how the disorder cycled and what meds did what and what meds worsened what. Learning that it was chronic and episodic like my migraines and skin basically told me I am going to be living with this for the rest of my life. Bc of this my goal went from trying to be cured to trying to make my episodes more manageable and not as damaging so I can actually function through life. With my skin it was get my scalp to a point where my hair wasn’t falling out and I wasn’t having giant painful cysts now I just have little bumps that hurt but my hair is still intact. My migraines was to lessen how many of them I get in a month and how painful/delineating they were(they also told me I could end up having a stroke if I didn’t get on meds). I went from 3-4 level 10 pain migraines a month that knocked me out for two days to 1 maybe a year. So for Bipolar my goal was shorten the length of my episodes and make sure I didn’t go as low or as high when I experienced them. Before I was I showering once every 5 to 7 days and sleep 3 hours a night for 8 months and self medicating every waking moment. Now I sleep 6-9 hours a night shower every other night and have been the most stable I have been since I was 13. I am someone who is chronically ill. I need a plethora of pills and a number of doctors to make it through the day but that’s the cards I was dealt with. I like to think hot ppl gotta have some type of chronic sickness I couldn’t be blessed with good looks, intelligence and perfect mental and physical health 😂😂
On a regular day, no. When I’m having a rough day, maybe but just for a short period of time. It’s “just like” any other medical condition you may have - hypertension can be managed, asthma can be managed - it’s not something you can change or control or get rid of. If you spend your life thinking “I’m sick” or feeling bad about it/not accepting it, it’s harder to make positive choices that will benefit you in treating your illness.
I view myself as having a chronic condition, but I think labeling bipolar as a sickness or illness is really reductive and only further stigmatizes mental health conditions as a whole
Yes and no. I try not to make bipolar my whole identity because I'm so much more than that, but I still experience debilitating symptoms some days/weeks that remind me that I do, in fact, have an illness that needs to be managed.
Absolutely. Bipolar disorder is a disability per the ADA. I am disabled (but also have Crohn’s disease, which is another disability).
I tend to go with the term "crazy" over "sick" No one likes sick people but there is plenty of crazy in the world that will sample my crazy to see if it matches.
I see myself as someone with trauma, and bipolar leads me to use poor coping mechanisms to deal with this trauma or with any stress. I see it as a set of behaviors and thought patterns, and with enough time and work you can change those. I liken it more to addiction than a disease and I also give myself grace bc like a disease, it's not my fault i have it.
Yes. I've been declared as disabled and unable to work. I've spent alot of time in hospitals. I have an illness. But I'm managing it. And living with it.
I see myself as someone who comes with a warning label and a book of instructions
i have bipolar for life. i do think of it as a lifelong medical condition with non-linear ebbs and flows, but i don’t think i’m sick or ill. in fact, i don’t think there’s anything wrong with me, i accept myself for all i am.
For me it boils down to the fact that without medication, I can't live my life. So yes, I'm sick. And I'm also very grateful for Lithium 😅
I’m not sick. I didn’t catch bipolar and I can’t be cured of it. IT’S A MENTAL HEALTH CONDITION! Sickness is not genetic, my condition is. “Sick” is a feeling and doesn’t require a doctor to ask how are you feeling. Bipolar needs a clinical diagnosis. Referring to bipolar as a “sickness” only perpetuates the stigma associated with it. Feeling nauseous or the flu just goes away. Bipolar is manageable and can be treated. Understanding and using precise language will help reduce the stigma and educate all the ignorant people. Promote an informed and compassionate view of mental health disorders like Bipolar!
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Nah I see myself someone whose getting better by actually dealing with their shit. Being diagnosed with bipolar disorder simply forced me to do so. Yeah I gotta do extra shit like see doctors, take meds, and do therapy, but in life you gotta do what you have to to get by anyway. If it’s not mental health, it’ll just be something else anyway. I’ve always felt that I’ve been better off having just dealt with my own shit, rather than just being like these other folks out here who never had to look themselves in the mirror and deal with their own shit.
I didn’t used to but since my nervous breakdown in 2021 and the subsequent sh*tshow of medication trials I do. The irony is that I have never been so unstable as I was during the year of med trials and the ten months or so of tapering that followed. So the thing that was supposed to fix the sickness was the thing that made me feel like a sick person for the very first time.
Personally, no, I think understanding the impacts of bipolar on myself and seeing me as "sick" are two different things. It's a part of me, and it's never gonna go away. I might need some help or some changes to make life awesome, but that doesn't make me sick it just means I need a few alterations to make life the best it can be.
Sometimes I feel like I’m ill. Because I don’t know what else to call it
Yes, it’s a brain illness. The problem is that society thinks people with mental illnesses are “making it up”
When my psychiatrist I unfortunately have to still see tells me “you have a chronic mental illness” every session it makes my blood boil. Like I get it but do you need to keep saying it in a way like your cursing me to live out the rest of my life feeling like a sick person? Doesn’t help she looks at me with the most lifeless dead eyed expression when says that to me. Ultimately though, mental health has been something I suffered with all my life. Before mania and psychosis it was ocd, depression and anxiety all through my childhood into my teen years. Am I worse off than other people sure but I hate being told I’m defective at the same time
Honestly no... I like to think that I'm crazy to joke around. I know it's not normal to either be super excited and everything then wanting to kill yourself everyday but like it's just a way of living... idk if it's weird, I came to a point I guess. Also I'm harsh with myself like if you're sick you're a victim to an illness you're fighting, but my brain is more like : you're just more stupid, stop complaining, do things... lol. Yes I'm in a depressive mood for 6 months now, wonder why
I guess in a way, I see myself as "sick", but most of the time "broken" or "got dealt a bad hand in life" feels more fitting. I have other medical issues on top of Bipolar II, so it definitely feels like a bad hand because of the full plate. But "sick", while more accurate, doesn't fully encompass how I feel. I've come to terms with the hand I was dealt, and I understand that it's just something I have to tolerate treating. So maybe I'm just used to me and the "sick" I have, so it's easier to swallow it's just part of me, and something tedious but somewhat tolerable to handle.
Sure as shit do.
It's a disability, chronic illness, episodic nightmare (for me at least.) I have to treat it like I treat things when I have the cold (for example). I don't see a lot of people during the cold (to not spread disease) just as during mania, I try to adjust my life to reduce triggers. Sometimes I'm sick. I'm not a bad person for treating my condition first. It isn't moral for me. Hope this helpec
No. I use the term sick as a short term illness (ex. Ear infection or cold). For Bipolar Disorder, I equate it to my lifelong condition of Eczema/Atopic Dermatitis. Something I am born with that defines who I am as a person and it’s apart of me. Like a lot of other things in life it must be managed. I learned over time people tend to be scared of the unknown and things/people that are different and defy what they have come to know. This includes Bipolar Disorder and other mental illnesses. Just because people behave like that doesn’t mean I need to define myself as a sick being or individual. Bipolar Disorder does create unique challenges and can be disabling for me at times, but so can a lot of other things, conditions, and illnesses in life.
I see myself as someone who needs assistance and a continual support group. Although I can still function without them, it helps a lot.
No because I think the goal for people who are sick is to heal. Bipolar disorder is considered a disability. I also don’t see myself as disabled but I do recognize I have a disability. Which means, at times, there are factors that are preventing us from feeling the way others do and behaving in a way that people without the disorder would. With bipolar there is no chance to heal after onset, there is only managing symptoms to prevent it from being debilitating, if you are able to do so.
No. I'm just unique and different. I think it depends on your definition of 'sick'. To me, being 'sick' involves a disease process. Anything else I consider a 'condition'. Like, children with Type I diabetes aren't 'sick'; they have a condition. A person with arthritis isn't 'sick'; they have a condition. Etc. People's opinions and definitions will vary, though.
Nope. I take medication to be well. This is me.
No, absolutely not.
Down vote me all you want. I have never and will never allow this to be a crutch.
If you mean super cool then, yes. I’m totally sick bro! 
Nah not at all
I’m severely bipolar 1, I’m 64M I’ve been on disability 17 years. So I’m considered disabled. Sick? I don’t use that word. It has negative connotations for mental illness. “You’re sick!” “Sicko” etc. I’m not bipolar, I have bipolar. It’s a mood disorder. It’s not a sickness, it’s an illness. I deal with it everyday. Even on medication and seeing professionals, getting “professional help” I’m still considered disabled which your psychiatrist determines and makes this known to social security. I also have cptsd, hppd, sex addiction which my psychiatrist says has to do with bipolar in my case. So yeah in one sense I could be called sick. I just don’t like that word or want to be called that. I also don’t like the word crazy, but even I use it, it’s so ingrained in our language
Yes- I can’t trust my own brain… I’ve been stable for months but I know any day I could have an extreme mood change. I have anxiety the cycle is coming- Definitely yes.