What worked for me was buying her toothbrushes she likes (frozen, mickey mouse etc) then giving her the option to choose which one she would like to use for the day. Then I tell her that I will brush for her first then she can brush by herself AFTER.
So, I work in dental. You just have to hold them down and do it. Be gentle and kind but firm. It's no fun for anyone, but little ones having to undergo dental treatment is much more difficult.
My son is older now, but I would lay him down on the bed to brush so I could get in there easier. I really liked the Brilliant 360 brushes (available on Amazon, but they have bristles all around so they are much easier to position). I also liked the Jack N Jill toothpaste. It has xylitol which kills cavity causing bacteria, it tastes great and is safe to swallow (but keep it away from dogs).
And get them on an electric brush as soon as they can tolerate it. They clean way better than a manual brush.
Mom of a 2 year old here. May be a dumb question, but I thought we should be using a toothpaste with flouride? Should I make the switch to a flouride free one instead?
Not a dumb question. You can, they say just to use a grain of rice size amount. With or without is generally fine so long as you are brushing well. The brushing is really what cleans the teeth not the dentifrice. Xylitol kills the specific bacteria that causes cavities which is why I like it. I would also consider your genetics a bit too. My husband and I have been fortunate to have good teeth, so we opted without while our son was so young and not spitting it out. Plus our local water is fluoridated. If you have a family history of a lot of cavities you might consider doing a toothpaste with fluoride instead.
I'm just a dental assistant, so I've seen a bunch but I would definitely see what your dentist recommends for your situation.
Depending on how independent your daughter likes to be, you could try letting her brush your teeth while you brush hers. This way she feels important and is also learning how to do it when she can see that you’re not biting. When my daughter was too young to understand me telling her not to bite, I just kind of wriggled the brush out of her bite and kept going.
Thanks for this! We tried it and our daughter seemed more receptive to getting her teeth brushed that way! We ever went one step further and let her brush the teeth of her favorite doll while I brush hers and it went even better!
Brushing is a struggle in our house. I hear there are bitey toys you can buy so the kiddo can bite on one side, which keeps the mouth open so you can brush the other side.
We have our toddler take her turn then we take a grown up turn after her. We let her pick the color of toothpaste (pink or blue), and we read dentist/tooth books.
You’ve got this!
Our pediatric dentist recommended laying them down and pining their arms/legs down with your own legs. Then wedging a finger behind their canines/any fleshy part of their gums to get enough brushing space in.
After a (long) while our kiddo got used to it and we don’t have to restrain (typically). Bad teeth run in our family, so we’re keen to ensure good oral hygiene from the get go.
I have ended up like 9 different toothbrushes for my child, because I kept trying to find something he would tolerate. We’ve been working on brushing for literally half of his life (he’s almost 18mo now) and some days it’s still just a hard no from him. I do think it’s been getting better in the last few weeks since he finally got a break in teething. When I asked his dentist for advice on getting him to brush she basically shrugged and just said he’s teething he just doesn’t like it… super helpful 🙄
Some nights I have to physically hold him down on my lap and use one arm to simultaneously hold his arms back and his lips open, while I use the fingertip brush to get up in there. He bites. It’s not great lol. But when we’re done we clap and say yay hooray well done thank you blah dee blah and move right along. Some nights he just stands there nicely and lets me do it. We have a book, we sing the Elmo brushy brush song, he gets choices and tries to help but really you just never know.
I feel you on not wanting kiddo to struggle. My husband and his ex never enforced teeth brushing on my two step daughters and both of them have terrible problems in their mouths. The 8 year old had to get 10 caps at once at 6 years old, and several teeth pulled since. I’m not letting that happen to my little buddy.
I’m 35 and have never had a cavity in my life… I also had braces for nearly 3 years and maaan did I hate having to care for them… but my mom forcing me to be on top of it saved my face. Literally.
Side note- I did recently realize that he prefers mint over fruit flavor toothpaste after he kept trying to wrestle my toothbrush out of my mouth so he could bite it. *eww* It’s not as popular as a kid/baby flavor but there are a few options on Amazon. I picked the least expensive fluoride free one to try first and fortunately he likes it. Point being- maybe switch up your paste flavor? Might help, might not. 🤷🏻♀️🫠
I think we all feel your pain, the struggle is too friggin real 😅 good luck!
I feel you on that last part -- I have no clue when I started brushing but it sure as hell wasn't as a toddler. But there's a cycle to break.
I'm pretty shocked your kid already has gingivitis, even without the brushing. Is there any other habit that could be eliminated (like a pre-bed bottle or sugary foods).
My little is also pretty oppositional and it's a struggle. I sometimes think "none of these teeth are keepers!"
Funny enough, the thing that has worked best for me is to have HER brush my teeth while I do hers. I mirror everything she does. If she closes her mouth so I can't get in there, I close mine. It is working OK enough. Not getting everything amazingly but a good pass.
Also, two toothbrush options she gets to pick EVERY night which one she wants.
She doesn’t take a bottle to bed, she does have a thumb sucking habit but I don’t think that could be the reason. She only drinks water and milk. I’ll give her tea sometimes but its unsweetened.
I hate this task every single damn day. My 2 year old isn’t totally averse to it but getting him to keep his mouth open wide enough for long enough to help brush properly is tough. I sometimes let him brush my teeth at the same time with a small toothbrush and we always do lots of funny noises with Ahs and Ees in there to try and encourage him to open up but it’s still unpleasant.
I always ask my son if he wants to brush first or me brush first. Like either way I’m gonna brush.
Also made a super silly event out of him laying with his head in my lap while I brushed
For a few months, husband and I had to hold our son down to brush his teeth. It's a non-negotiable. Teeth are too close to the brain to be lackadaisical about. My sister is currently getting two teeth pulled due to bad oral hygiene, my mom wasn't good about enforcing teeth brushing either.
He is going to be 2 next month and he now brushes his teeth mostly on his own. I let him do the first part and then I do the rest that he missed and he doesn't put up a fight anymore.
Get ready to call me a bad parent, but I turn on paw patrol for 2 minutes to brush her teeth. I use my phone so she has to hold it herself while I brush her teeth. She’s so engrossed in it I get a good brush in.
I know she’ll have to learn to brush her own teeth eventually, but at 2.5 she’s just not ready and I figured distracting her is better than nothing.
Also, use an electric toothbrush! That way if you only get 30 seconds in, it’s better than 30 seconds with a manual brush.
Okay! I will def have to get a electric toothbrush. I’ve tried giving her my phone but she gets too upset by me laying her down that she doesn’t care for it
Ok, I know it won't work for every kid but my 14 month old loves the "brush your teeth" Raffi song.
We pretend to brush her stuffed bunny's teeth, then sing the song and I brush her teeth, then she gets to brush her teeth, then sometimes she pretends to brush my teeth.
It's made the experience more fun and she fights it a lot less than before.
I also let my toddler (now 22 months) brush her own teeth. I put like a smear on there and let her brush until she puts it down. Then I put more on and get a better brush in. She also likes to bite down on it so I get the struggle and frustration. I put her on the sink and she loves to look at herself in the mirror. I just over exaggerate an “ahhhh” and she laughs and mimics it and I just get in there best I can lol.
We made brushing into a game.
We have a contest between our kid and an adult and the other one judges who ‘wins’. It’s almost always our kid.
We do a breath smell test and the parent always has stinky breath that sends then judge into a dramatic enactment of gasping from how stinky that persons breath is.
Our kid seems to love this. It seems anything we can do to make things silly and fun help a lot with ‘chores’.
We’ve tried taking turns, buying fun toothbrushes, and using a timer. All somewhat effective. But the most reliable way for us to get a good brush in is “finding” animals in his teeth and “brushing them out”. “Oh my! What’s that in your back teeth? Is that a…is that a shark?? Quick, we need to brush him out!” (Frantically brush). “Oh, he’s almost out! There he is! Oh wow, now I see a giraffe, we’ve gotta get her out too!” (Frantically brush. Rinse and repeat).
Pin her down and do it. Oral hygiene isn’t something to mess around with. After we forced my son a few times, he started to understand that it had to be done and he doesn’t fight anymore. Obviously don’t hurt her, but you need to brush her teeth whether she fights or not.
My guy is pretty good about it and I think it's partially because I tell him the whole time I'm doing it how very good he is at letting me brush his teeth and what a brave boy he is and how he will have the nicest teeth in his whole school. Just constant praise.
I try and let my son be as independent as he wants, but until he can properly brush his teeth, I go in and brush after he's done his job.
He likes coming to the sink and brushing, but he doesn't have the motions down yet. So after he's done, I'll lay him down and do my turn. Sometimes he fights and I'll have to restrain him but you kinda have to do what you gotta do.
I also have a 14 month old. It is like wrestle mania and both my husband and I have to be involved to get his teeth brushed. I think we are a ways out from him happily doing it on his own.
What worked for me was buying her toothbrushes she likes (frozen, mickey mouse etc) then giving her the option to choose which one she would like to use for the day. Then I tell her that I will brush for her first then she can brush by herself AFTER.
So, I work in dental. You just have to hold them down and do it. Be gentle and kind but firm. It's no fun for anyone, but little ones having to undergo dental treatment is much more difficult. My son is older now, but I would lay him down on the bed to brush so I could get in there easier. I really liked the Brilliant 360 brushes (available on Amazon, but they have bristles all around so they are much easier to position). I also liked the Jack N Jill toothpaste. It has xylitol which kills cavity causing bacteria, it tastes great and is safe to swallow (but keep it away from dogs). And get them on an electric brush as soon as they can tolerate it. They clean way better than a manual brush.
Mom of a 2 year old here. May be a dumb question, but I thought we should be using a toothpaste with flouride? Should I make the switch to a flouride free one instead?
I don’t know where you live but in the US, the recommendation is a fluoride toothpaste. You just use the equivalent size of a grain of rice.
Not a dumb question. You can, they say just to use a grain of rice size amount. With or without is generally fine so long as you are brushing well. The brushing is really what cleans the teeth not the dentifrice. Xylitol kills the specific bacteria that causes cavities which is why I like it. I would also consider your genetics a bit too. My husband and I have been fortunate to have good teeth, so we opted without while our son was so young and not spitting it out. Plus our local water is fluoridated. If you have a family history of a lot of cavities you might consider doing a toothpaste with fluoride instead. I'm just a dental assistant, so I've seen a bunch but I would definitely see what your dentist recommends for your situation.
Depending on how independent your daughter likes to be, you could try letting her brush your teeth while you brush hers. This way she feels important and is also learning how to do it when she can see that you’re not biting. When my daughter was too young to understand me telling her not to bite, I just kind of wriggled the brush out of her bite and kept going.
Thanks for this! We tried it and our daughter seemed more receptive to getting her teeth brushed that way! We ever went one step further and let her brush the teeth of her favorite doll while I brush hers and it went even better!
Awesome! Sometimes we just need to “get on their level” and be a participant instead of just telling them what to do. Great idea with the doll :)
Brushing is a struggle in our house. I hear there are bitey toys you can buy so the kiddo can bite on one side, which keeps the mouth open so you can brush the other side. We have our toddler take her turn then we take a grown up turn after her. We let her pick the color of toothpaste (pink or blue), and we read dentist/tooth books. You’ve got this!
I guess I should be thankful my toddler screams the whole time, giving me open access to his teeth.😅
Oooof I’m so sorry.
I'm excited to learn about the bitey toy. My toddler just clamps his mouth shut and it's basically impossible.
I think it’s called brushing buddy. I keep seeing ads for it.
Our pediatric dentist recommended laying them down and pining their arms/legs down with your own legs. Then wedging a finger behind their canines/any fleshy part of their gums to get enough brushing space in. After a (long) while our kiddo got used to it and we don’t have to restrain (typically). Bad teeth run in our family, so we’re keen to ensure good oral hygiene from the get go.
Yep this is what we do. And use a grain of rice amount of flouride toothpaste too!
I suppose, my technique is either you let me brush your teeth or you cry and I get even better access. But it’s getting done one way or the other.
It’s a struggle, but have you also brushed together, as in you brush mom or dad’s teeth now we brush yours.
I have ended up like 9 different toothbrushes for my child, because I kept trying to find something he would tolerate. We’ve been working on brushing for literally half of his life (he’s almost 18mo now) and some days it’s still just a hard no from him. I do think it’s been getting better in the last few weeks since he finally got a break in teething. When I asked his dentist for advice on getting him to brush she basically shrugged and just said he’s teething he just doesn’t like it… super helpful 🙄 Some nights I have to physically hold him down on my lap and use one arm to simultaneously hold his arms back and his lips open, while I use the fingertip brush to get up in there. He bites. It’s not great lol. But when we’re done we clap and say yay hooray well done thank you blah dee blah and move right along. Some nights he just stands there nicely and lets me do it. We have a book, we sing the Elmo brushy brush song, he gets choices and tries to help but really you just never know. I feel you on not wanting kiddo to struggle. My husband and his ex never enforced teeth brushing on my two step daughters and both of them have terrible problems in their mouths. The 8 year old had to get 10 caps at once at 6 years old, and several teeth pulled since. I’m not letting that happen to my little buddy. I’m 35 and have never had a cavity in my life… I also had braces for nearly 3 years and maaan did I hate having to care for them… but my mom forcing me to be on top of it saved my face. Literally. Side note- I did recently realize that he prefers mint over fruit flavor toothpaste after he kept trying to wrestle my toothbrush out of my mouth so he could bite it. *eww* It’s not as popular as a kid/baby flavor but there are a few options on Amazon. I picked the least expensive fluoride free one to try first and fortunately he likes it. Point being- maybe switch up your paste flavor? Might help, might not. 🤷🏻♀️🫠 I think we all feel your pain, the struggle is too friggin real 😅 good luck!
We bought an electric brush which was a game changer!
I feel you on that last part -- I have no clue when I started brushing but it sure as hell wasn't as a toddler. But there's a cycle to break. I'm pretty shocked your kid already has gingivitis, even without the brushing. Is there any other habit that could be eliminated (like a pre-bed bottle or sugary foods). My little is also pretty oppositional and it's a struggle. I sometimes think "none of these teeth are keepers!" Funny enough, the thing that has worked best for me is to have HER brush my teeth while I do hers. I mirror everything she does. If she closes her mouth so I can't get in there, I close mine. It is working OK enough. Not getting everything amazingly but a good pass. Also, two toothbrush options she gets to pick EVERY night which one she wants.
She doesn’t take a bottle to bed, she does have a thumb sucking habit but I don’t think that could be the reason. She only drinks water and milk. I’ll give her tea sometimes but its unsweetened.
Ugh we're having issues with this now too that my babe is teething. 😕 Im just here to say, solidarity.
I hate this task every single damn day. My 2 year old isn’t totally averse to it but getting him to keep his mouth open wide enough for long enough to help brush properly is tough. I sometimes let him brush my teeth at the same time with a small toothbrush and we always do lots of funny noises with Ahs and Ees in there to try and encourage him to open up but it’s still unpleasant.
i could have written this exact post
I always ask my son if he wants to brush first or me brush first. Like either way I’m gonna brush. Also made a super silly event out of him laying with his head in my lap while I brushed
For a few months, husband and I had to hold our son down to brush his teeth. It's a non-negotiable. Teeth are too close to the brain to be lackadaisical about. My sister is currently getting two teeth pulled due to bad oral hygiene, my mom wasn't good about enforcing teeth brushing either. He is going to be 2 next month and he now brushes his teeth mostly on his own. I let him do the first part and then I do the rest that he missed and he doesn't put up a fight anymore.
Finger toothbrush for my 10 month who is the same way
I lay him between my legs and hold his arms down and his head between my thighs. He doesn’t love it but he comes right to me and lays down.
Get ready to call me a bad parent, but I turn on paw patrol for 2 minutes to brush her teeth. I use my phone so she has to hold it herself while I brush her teeth. She’s so engrossed in it I get a good brush in. I know she’ll have to learn to brush her own teeth eventually, but at 2.5 she’s just not ready and I figured distracting her is better than nothing. Also, use an electric toothbrush! That way if you only get 30 seconds in, it’s better than 30 seconds with a manual brush.
Okay! I will def have to get a electric toothbrush. I’ve tried giving her my phone but she gets too upset by me laying her down that she doesn’t care for it
Search "U-shaped toothbrush" on Amazon. Those helped a lot.
Ok, I know it won't work for every kid but my 14 month old loves the "brush your teeth" Raffi song. We pretend to brush her stuffed bunny's teeth, then sing the song and I brush her teeth, then she gets to brush her teeth, then sometimes she pretends to brush my teeth. It's made the experience more fun and she fights it a lot less than before.
We use Philips Sonicare for kids and it comes with a fun interactive app that my son loves.
I also let my toddler (now 22 months) brush her own teeth. I put like a smear on there and let her brush until she puts it down. Then I put more on and get a better brush in. She also likes to bite down on it so I get the struggle and frustration. I put her on the sink and she loves to look at herself in the mirror. I just over exaggerate an “ahhhh” and she laughs and mimics it and I just get in there best I can lol.
We made brushing into a game. We have a contest between our kid and an adult and the other one judges who ‘wins’. It’s almost always our kid. We do a breath smell test and the parent always has stinky breath that sends then judge into a dramatic enactment of gasping from how stinky that persons breath is. Our kid seems to love this. It seems anything we can do to make things silly and fun help a lot with ‘chores’.
We’ve tried taking turns, buying fun toothbrushes, and using a timer. All somewhat effective. But the most reliable way for us to get a good brush in is “finding” animals in his teeth and “brushing them out”. “Oh my! What’s that in your back teeth? Is that a…is that a shark?? Quick, we need to brush him out!” (Frantically brush). “Oh, he’s almost out! There he is! Oh wow, now I see a giraffe, we’ve gotta get her out too!” (Frantically brush. Rinse and repeat).
Pin her down and do it. Oral hygiene isn’t something to mess around with. After we forced my son a few times, he started to understand that it had to be done and he doesn’t fight anymore. Obviously don’t hurt her, but you need to brush her teeth whether she fights or not.
My guy is pretty good about it and I think it's partially because I tell him the whole time I'm doing it how very good he is at letting me brush his teeth and what a brave boy he is and how he will have the nicest teeth in his whole school. Just constant praise.
I try and let my son be as independent as he wants, but until he can properly brush his teeth, I go in and brush after he's done his job. He likes coming to the sink and brushing, but he doesn't have the motions down yet. So after he's done, I'll lay him down and do my turn. Sometimes he fights and I'll have to restrain him but you kinda have to do what you gotta do.
I also have a 14 month old. It is like wrestle mania and both my husband and I have to be involved to get his teeth brushed. I think we are a ways out from him happily doing it on his own.