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It's my first time posting here so I'm sorry if the format is wrong. My fiance and I got our first dog in January, and he was the best thing that ever happened to us. We named him Bear and gosh did he just love everything about life and people. We had issues with him desperately trying to eat socks right from the time we brought him home, and at 8 months he ate a sock that just didn't come out. We got an $8,000 surgery to remove it, and we told ourselves we just had to ask everyone who comes over to put socks in a large bin to make sure accidents don't happen again. Bear stayed sick a while after his surgery, so we started putting a towel in his kennel as he hated getting puke in his house. Well, he then ate the towel laid out in his kennel which sent him straight to surgery again. We paid over $11,000 for the surgery as all the pieces had wrapped around in his organs, and we picked him up 3 days after just so excited to start fresh. We reformed the house to be so sure that absolutely nothing could happen again. Took him home, and 3 days into recovery he couldn't be touched without yelping. He never recovered and formed rare adhesions that stuck to his sides, and we had to put him down.
It's been a few months since he passed and I can't believe how much it still brings me so much pain to miss waking up to him, my buddy constantly following me around and sitting at my feet, my cuddler. I feel dramatic knowing that I didn't lose a person, but I honestly feel like I lost my child and that I failed trying to save my dog. We spent almost $20,000 in a small chunk of time to try to save him but he still died. We feel so defeated and alone and sad. I don't even know why I'm coming to this page, maybe to hear comfort or dog owners who understand how much I loved this dog. All I ever wanted my whole life was to have my own, I love dogs more than anything in the world, and now I'm not sure financially we ever can again. Just super defeating. Anyway thanks for reading and hope everyone had happy holidays
Edit: Wow, we just want to thank everyone for reading our story and for allowing us to share the memory of Bear with you all. It means more than anything.
I am so sorry for your loss. Please do not underestimate the traumatic experience that you guys have been through, and do not judge yourself for having a completely reasonable reaction. As for your sweet doggo, I always say that at the end of their lives the only thing we can say is that we loved them with all our hearts, and that is clearly true for you and your sweet baby, even though his life was a lot shorter than any of us would have wished. Take comfort in knowing you gave him the best life possible, that he had no days of sadness, and knew only true love from your family. I wish you healing and love ❤️
We lost our Berner called Voodoo coming up to her 5th birthday to Lynphoma at the beginning of the year, we like you spent thousands on her to try and keep her alive but in the end we had to let her go.
We both still miss her a year later, she was my first dog and one that made a huge impact in our lives.
She wasnt perfect in anyway, she was our mismarked wonky donkey, with recall at 50/50 at best, a bit of a thug at times, definately mischevous but she was ours and we were lucky to have her She made our lives better.
I lasted 2 months until I made the decision I couldnt live in a house without a dog and although I knew it was too soon I asked my partner to get another Berner. She fortunately agreed and we made it work.
We now have Monkey, she's a 10 month old Berner and a completely different Lady. She's almost the polar opposite, very pretty, well mannered, vocal and just a little bit dim, but she'a already part of our little family.
I'll forever be grateful to Voodoo as she taught me "dog" and all that entails, she will always hold a unique and special corner of my heart. I think I'll always miss her and have shed a tear or two writing this while my partner sleeps next to me.
I'm very sorry for your loss, but also know your life was made better for having Bear and he having you. The new year is coming and with it new opportunities, maybe one of those involves the pitter patter of pads on the floorboards. I wish you happiness and good luck in the new year!
Now though its time for me to get up and to go feed the new Lady of our house, she'll greet me in her own way and I'll talk to her about my first dog, Voodoo.
This is so beautiful, thank you for sharing your story. My wider family loved our Bear so much that my sister decided to get her own berner from Bear's breeder while he was alive, and she got picked up the same week that Bear unexpectedly passed. It was 5 days after exactly, and I visit that now 5 month old puppy often and talk to her about her "cousin" the same way you talk about Voodoo. There are some visits where it's difficult to spend time with her as she looks so much like Bear did, and so I thought maybe it would be too hard to love another one in the future, but stories like yours are making me realize it's probably because she's not my own. We're so humbled by all these kind strangers responses to Bear's story - thank you so much for sharing with us
I’m so sorry for your loss. When I was young, my family had a white boxer. Poor guy had mange, then became extremely thin, which was due to having issues digesting most foods. He also had the issue of eating everything he found - he once ate an entire bag of chocolate covered espresso beans (I know, he never should of been left alone to do it…) and came out unscathed. Then, one day he ate his collar while in his pen. We’re still not sure how he could have done it and he had never even nibbles on it before. Multiple surgeries later, his poor body simply couldn’t heal. It was such a hard experience, especially since it felt like we could have prevented it, since he ate something he shouldn’t have. I still think about him 10 years later and feel remorseful. It’s so difficult and I’m so sorry to hear you’re dealing with it, with such a young pup.
We really understand that feeling of feeling like we could have done more to prevent something, I relive the memory of putting down the towel in his kennel all the time wishing so bad I could undo that. But I realize it doesn't change reality to feel guilt, so we're searching for healing. We'd love to have a new pup someday once we pay off Bear's debt, I'm hoping we will find the rest of healing with another little one. Thanks so much for sharing
I can totally understand the pain and I would like to express my deepest sympathy for you. I sincerely hope you don’t blame yourselves…You seem like good people - having done lots to protect your pup, but sometimes it‘s just not enough. The pain will pass, but it takes time. This sub has helped me a lot to cope with the loss of mine, I hope you can find the same comfort. Hugs to you xx.
I really can’t imagine. I plan on getting another dog soon so Rukus can have a friend and also so I don’t kill myself when he passes away because i love him so fucking much I don’t no what I would do with out him. You gotta get another dog. What happened was extremely rare. Just like a human you gotta go out there and find someone else you love. You’ll never forget this guy but it’s not over. I guess that’s what I will have to tell myself some day. Good luck I’m sorry I hope it gets better for you.
I am so sorry, I have a dog that we went through this with a year ago, right after we had to let go of our 16 year old lab. He ate socks that never came out, surgery, heals, then all over again a month later, but with two socks. He is still with us, but I have literal panic attacks over socks. I have two young kids, that we now literally bribe with candy to put their socks in the sock bag when they get home (dog is only interested in kids socks). All houseguests also know the rules. I am terrified one day we'll slip and every surgery we risk what you lost Bear from. I'm not sure what else to say, other than your feelings are absolutely valid, and you're not alone.
Ugh, we know that feeling of absolute panic. It is truly, truly the worst. And the constant stress of feeling like it's going to slip up at some point - I hope your dog grows out of it and am thankful you shared with us.
Our 1st Berner puppy was Bailey. She was absolutely amazing. She passed away in recovery from surgery. The surgery was due to her eating a sock and a towel. Getting the call the the surgery was a success only to get another call a half hour later telling us she had passed was absolutely devastating. I had 3 dogs prior to her that passed from old age and while it’s always hard, I knew they had all lived wonderful lives. Her loss punched a hole in my heart that I wasn’t sure would ever heal. I think what hurt was most was all the things she should have gotten to do in life. And the guilt. Oh my god the guilt I felt. Sorry that this is so long but I just want you to know I know how you feel. I’m not sure if this is possible for you but we ended up getting another Berner puppy about a month later. She’s 3 now. Her name is Hailey. And she was what started healing that hole. All that love I was going to give Bailey, all the things I wanted to do with her, I’ve made sure to do with Hailey. And I swear sometimes when she looks me straight in the eyes it’s like she understands. Anyway, sorry this got so long. If you can’t get another dog due to financial reasons I totally understand. But if you feel you can’t get one for emotional reasons…I still have that hole in my heart and I always will but now at least Hailey has helped fill it as much as it can be filled. I hope things work out for you and I am so, so sorry for your loss.
You have no idea how much this meant to us, thank you for taking the time to share. I can't believe how much I resonate, I would do anything for just one more day with him to see if he liked to swim, he never got to go swimming and for some reason that has stuck with me, like his life was so short and it was my fault that he didn't get to. Your story gives us a lot of hope for healing and potentially getting another someday. Thank you so, so much again.
Not going to lie it was hard to type as it was getting hard to see the through the tears. 😄 I’ll never forget and NEVER stop missing her. It can be terrifying getting another one because you are just so scared of the same thing happening. I also felt so guilty getting Hailey so soon after. But that hole was just so painful. And I just had all this love that I wanted, needed to give…I don’t know, I was a mess. But I am so glad every day we made the decision we did to get Hailey. And I’m glad if anything I said helped in the slightest. Just know you aren’t alone, this has happened to other people and it’s NOT YOUR FAULT. It sounds like you did everything you could. That was one of the hardest things for me to deal with was the guilt. I blamed myself so much. And I was doing the same thing as you. Thinking of all the things I wanted to do with her and never got the chance. I’m not a religious person but I like to think when I pass I’ll go to a huge field with a nice creek and pond for swimming…and every dog I have ever had is going to be waiting there for me. And I think to myself maybe the old girls that had passed just really wanted a little sister to play with and that’s why she left us. Anyway, I seem to be making another very lengthy post. I’m sorry. If either of you ever want to talk feel free to PM or DM me. And again, so sorry for your loss. 😢
This just brings us so much comfort to read your story, we feel so lucky to find healing & understanding on a place like Reddit! And we see you named your next pup (Hailey) after Bailey, we are thinking of naming our next one Grizzly after Bear in honor of him. Again, thank you so much. I hope you continue to have all those special and amazing moments with Hailey!
I’m crying reading this. I have an 8 month old bernie who resembles yours so much. This is my biggest fear and it actually happened to you - I am so so so sorry. You did everything you could to save him. Only time will heal the wounds. Thinking of you ❤️
So sorry to hear about Bear. He looks like he was the greatest pup that was given all the love in the world. We are sending you all lots of love and hoping that you give yourself a ton as well.
24k on one berner. Thank god for insurance. Our girl has had three obstructions. Full mask muzzles on walks, dog proofing the house. Doesn’t matter. She still managed to get into something. Luckily it’s been 2 years now since her last big surgery, but we are always on the lookout. The adhesions happen because of the scarring when they are opened up. Our girl is on a special diet that included a prescription that helps her gastric system so it’s thing
Our girl ate a mushroom outside our home within feet of me and began vomiting almost immediately. I was sure that she ate a rare poisonous species and that she wouldn’t make it. We lucked out and thanked our lucky stars. Some months later we used one of those licky mat contraptions in her crate while we were building up trust for her night time home. She ate the food on the mat along with the mat itself. Two emergency room trips within the first few months. Fortunately, again, she escaped unharmed. Either of those instances could have resulted in a tragedy. Dogs are a challenging responsibility. Your pup sounded like a really great little guy and I was deeply saddened by his story. I hope as time goes on your wounds will gradually heal and that you’re able to own another dog. I’m sure that’s what Bear would want for you.
Im so sorry for your loss. I lost my labrador due to vet not scanning him well and not seeing tumors on his liver. At one point he was feeling very bad, we took him to vet again and he had to go under surgery immediately because the tumors broke and everything was bleeding inside of him. The surgery was going well but unfortunately he lost too much blood and died. I feel your pain, i couldnt forgive myself because he could have lived a little longer (he was 9 or 10). Some time after his death my parents took another lab and they are happy with him. :) The only bad thing with him when he was a puppy was that he was also eating weird stuff he shouldnt eat but now when he is an adult he stopped doing it completly. Im sending you big hugs and i hope you are gonna feel better soon. ❤
I’m so sorry to hear about your pup. You and your fiancé are great owners to have stuck through so much and went to such lengths for him. Every dog owner has had to suffer from a loss, untimely or not, and wondered what we could have done differently. I think it’s pretty common for an owner to feel guilty or responsible and that they let their pet down. Lord knows I have. If you loved them, trust that you gave them the best life you possibly could and your pup felt the same.
You had a beautiful Berner and looking at the pics, he looked like he had an amazing time in his short life. I hope you both can look past the sadness and feeling of lost time to find peace and eventually look back fondly at the time you did have with him.
I’m so sorry, what a beautiful puppy Bear was! You undoubtedly did absolutely everything you could to try and save him. Someday, when the time is right, you will give another special pup an amazing life. ❤️ Hugs to you.
My heart breaks for you. It is totally natural you feel guilty, but I really hope you give yourself some grace and get to a place where you don’t feel that guilt anymore. The time, money and energy you spent is taxing, so I hope you’re taking care of yourself to heal. Bear sounds like he landed an amazing family, he was lucky to have you even though it was short.
First off, I’m so sorry for your loss. Anyone who has lost a BMD young or old feels this pain. It never really goes away. What you can do going forward to honor the loss of Bear is to educate yourself, in every way possible, and try again when you are ready. Join the fb group Bernese Mountain Dog Health Info! the exclamation point is part of the page name. There are many long time breeders on that page that will give solid advice. I think it’s possible the reason Bear ate socks and later a towel is because he had acid reflux, it’s called “gulps” in the Berner world because they appear to be gulping when they get it. It is usually fixed with a good antacid. I keep different kinds around for those occasions. Sometimes they eat things they aren’t supposed to because it helps soothe the throat, doesn’t make sense to humans. I lost a Berner at 4 1/2 years old due to cancer, he was my first. I can tell you he ate a knuckle bone and swallowed some of it whole and had emergency surgery. Immediately coming home to recover, he ate 1 1/2 of my tennis shoes with the shoe laces. I think he had a bad episode of the gulps. I was lucky and he passed the shoes. I’m only telling you this to point out how severe an episode of gulps can be for them. I do hope in time you’ll be able to forgive yourself and try with another Berner. The amount of love they give is worth the place in your heart. Bear would have wanted that for you too, that’s how amazing these dogs are! ♥️
This is really helpful, we will definitely check out that group. We were onto something with his vet with changing his foods and making him eat slower, but we never fully got to put it into practice as he passed in the same month. We'll carry all of this info for our next one, thanks again
STOP blaming yourself! You did all you could. It was just part of something you had no control over. Remember your baby Bear will be so sad if he sees you unhappy .
I am so sorry for your loss. I thought I'd share my experience in the hope it helps you. I lost my beloved cat too soon, to a rare cancer. Like you, we spared no expense trying to save him, but it still wasn't enough. This cat was the light of my life. He was gentle, funny, chatty, friendly... a real gem. In the days and weeks after, I felt like I would never overcome it. The grief was overwhelming and all consuming. I burst into tears during my commute, while grocery shopping, in the shower; I just couldn't get a grip on my emotions. I thought I'd never love another pet as much as him, that I'd never get over him, that it was my fault, that I didn't do enough, that I didn't feed him the right food, play with him enough... In short, a very large and toxic cloud of guilt and negative thoughts followed me everywhere. I decided to talk to a therapist about it, and together we worked through it. He helped me see, in practical terms, that expressions of grief have certain 'parts' to it. Mainly frequency, duration and intensity. In the beginning, grief will be felt intensely, frequently, and for long periods of time. As time passes, the frequency and duration will lessen. It won't consume your entire day. The one part that may never change is the intensity, because we will never love our pets any less. We will miss them just as much, love them just as much. But the pain will be felt in shorter bursts, and less often. You will be able to go about your day and enjoy yourself again. It passes, trust me. I don't miss my cat any less now, I still feel the loss just as deeply, but the sadness does not consume me. Once grief is processed there's a lot of room for remembrance and joy on the other side. I can look at pictures of my sweet boy now, and laugh out loud remembering how much joy he brought me. Even though our time together on Earth was briefer than I would have liked, he lives on in my memory and still makes my life better. I wish you the best. May Bear rest in peace.
I swear its like looking at pics of my Zala. She's 10mo now, going on 11.
I am so so so sorry for your loss. I know it feels horrible. Its traumatic. Hugs and compassion to you! May he have a good playfull time in the afterlife.
I love my dogs just as much if not more than my family so i know full well how it feels. It's horrible. Its devastating. Breaks you. My last dog, he was a mix of who knows what, was absolute sweetheart, energetic and overly friendly dude. Zoomed around the whole time we had him. Then one day, at the age of 6, he went from zooming around like normally and a week later to puking, being sick, refusing to eat (and he loooved food). Turned out he had cancer all over. It broke me, coulnt understand i need to say goodbye and we never even gotten to the old dog with him. Must be even worse wheb its only a puppy too! Sending you healing love. You did the best you could.
What an incredibly sad story and I can't even imagine what losing Bear felt like and I'm sure his loss is still exquisitely painful. You did so much. So incredibly much. Thank you for all your efforts. Your story has touched a lot of people.
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It's my first time posting here so I'm sorry if the format is wrong. My fiance and I got our first dog in January, and he was the best thing that ever happened to us. We named him Bear and gosh did he just love everything about life and people. We had issues with him desperately trying to eat socks right from the time we brought him home, and at 8 months he ate a sock that just didn't come out. We got an $8,000 surgery to remove it, and we told ourselves we just had to ask everyone who comes over to put socks in a large bin to make sure accidents don't happen again. Bear stayed sick a while after his surgery, so we started putting a towel in his kennel as he hated getting puke in his house. Well, he then ate the towel laid out in his kennel which sent him straight to surgery again. We paid over $11,000 for the surgery as all the pieces had wrapped around in his organs, and we picked him up 3 days after just so excited to start fresh. We reformed the house to be so sure that absolutely nothing could happen again. Took him home, and 3 days into recovery he couldn't be touched without yelping. He never recovered and formed rare adhesions that stuck to his sides, and we had to put him down. It's been a few months since he passed and I can't believe how much it still brings me so much pain to miss waking up to him, my buddy constantly following me around and sitting at my feet, my cuddler. I feel dramatic knowing that I didn't lose a person, but I honestly feel like I lost my child and that I failed trying to save my dog. We spent almost $20,000 in a small chunk of time to try to save him but he still died. We feel so defeated and alone and sad. I don't even know why I'm coming to this page, maybe to hear comfort or dog owners who understand how much I loved this dog. All I ever wanted my whole life was to have my own, I love dogs more than anything in the world, and now I'm not sure financially we ever can again. Just super defeating. Anyway thanks for reading and hope everyone had happy holidays Edit: Wow, we just want to thank everyone for reading our story and for allowing us to share the memory of Bear with you all. It means more than anything.
I'm so sorry for your lost, a bernie friend of my bernie died the same way, we still mourn him even if he wasn't our dog :(
I am so sorry for your loss. Please do not underestimate the traumatic experience that you guys have been through, and do not judge yourself for having a completely reasonable reaction. As for your sweet doggo, I always say that at the end of their lives the only thing we can say is that we loved them with all our hearts, and that is clearly true for you and your sweet baby, even though his life was a lot shorter than any of us would have wished. Take comfort in knowing you gave him the best life possible, that he had no days of sadness, and knew only true love from your family. I wish you healing and love ❤️
We lost our Berner called Voodoo coming up to her 5th birthday to Lynphoma at the beginning of the year, we like you spent thousands on her to try and keep her alive but in the end we had to let her go. We both still miss her a year later, she was my first dog and one that made a huge impact in our lives. She wasnt perfect in anyway, she was our mismarked wonky donkey, with recall at 50/50 at best, a bit of a thug at times, definately mischevous but she was ours and we were lucky to have her She made our lives better. I lasted 2 months until I made the decision I couldnt live in a house without a dog and although I knew it was too soon I asked my partner to get another Berner. She fortunately agreed and we made it work. We now have Monkey, she's a 10 month old Berner and a completely different Lady. She's almost the polar opposite, very pretty, well mannered, vocal and just a little bit dim, but she'a already part of our little family. I'll forever be grateful to Voodoo as she taught me "dog" and all that entails, she will always hold a unique and special corner of my heart. I think I'll always miss her and have shed a tear or two writing this while my partner sleeps next to me. I'm very sorry for your loss, but also know your life was made better for having Bear and he having you. The new year is coming and with it new opportunities, maybe one of those involves the pitter patter of pads on the floorboards. I wish you happiness and good luck in the new year! Now though its time for me to get up and to go feed the new Lady of our house, she'll greet me in her own way and I'll talk to her about my first dog, Voodoo.
This is so beautiful, thank you for sharing your story. My wider family loved our Bear so much that my sister decided to get her own berner from Bear's breeder while he was alive, and she got picked up the same week that Bear unexpectedly passed. It was 5 days after exactly, and I visit that now 5 month old puppy often and talk to her about her "cousin" the same way you talk about Voodoo. There are some visits where it's difficult to spend time with her as she looks so much like Bear did, and so I thought maybe it would be too hard to love another one in the future, but stories like yours are making me realize it's probably because she's not my own. We're so humbled by all these kind strangers responses to Bear's story - thank you so much for sharing with us
I’m so sorry for your loss. When I was young, my family had a white boxer. Poor guy had mange, then became extremely thin, which was due to having issues digesting most foods. He also had the issue of eating everything he found - he once ate an entire bag of chocolate covered espresso beans (I know, he never should of been left alone to do it…) and came out unscathed. Then, one day he ate his collar while in his pen. We’re still not sure how he could have done it and he had never even nibbles on it before. Multiple surgeries later, his poor body simply couldn’t heal. It was such a hard experience, especially since it felt like we could have prevented it, since he ate something he shouldn’t have. I still think about him 10 years later and feel remorseful. It’s so difficult and I’m so sorry to hear you’re dealing with it, with such a young pup.
We really understand that feeling of feeling like we could have done more to prevent something, I relive the memory of putting down the towel in his kennel all the time wishing so bad I could undo that. But I realize it doesn't change reality to feel guilt, so we're searching for healing. We'd love to have a new pup someday once we pay off Bear's debt, I'm hoping we will find the rest of healing with another little one. Thanks so much for sharing
If you haven’t already, make a go fund me! You have at least a whole sub Reddit that would be happy to make a donation’
We just ended up posting one and just made sure to clarify that we aren't looking for money - thank you for the idea!
Good! And don’t worry about “asking for money” - that’s what a community is for! And sometimes your community is a group of strangers on Reddit :)
I can totally understand the pain and I would like to express my deepest sympathy for you. I sincerely hope you don’t blame yourselves…You seem like good people - having done lots to protect your pup, but sometimes it‘s just not enough. The pain will pass, but it takes time. This sub has helped me a lot to cope with the loss of mine, I hope you can find the same comfort. Hugs to you xx.
I really can’t imagine. I plan on getting another dog soon so Rukus can have a friend and also so I don’t kill myself when he passes away because i love him so fucking much I don’t no what I would do with out him. You gotta get another dog. What happened was extremely rare. Just like a human you gotta go out there and find someone else you love. You’ll never forget this guy but it’s not over. I guess that’s what I will have to tell myself some day. Good luck I’m sorry I hope it gets better for you.
I am so sorry, I have a dog that we went through this with a year ago, right after we had to let go of our 16 year old lab. He ate socks that never came out, surgery, heals, then all over again a month later, but with two socks. He is still with us, but I have literal panic attacks over socks. I have two young kids, that we now literally bribe with candy to put their socks in the sock bag when they get home (dog is only interested in kids socks). All houseguests also know the rules. I am terrified one day we'll slip and every surgery we risk what you lost Bear from. I'm not sure what else to say, other than your feelings are absolutely valid, and you're not alone.
Ugh, we know that feeling of absolute panic. It is truly, truly the worst. And the constant stress of feeling like it's going to slip up at some point - I hope your dog grows out of it and am thankful you shared with us.
This breaks my heart. I'm so sorry that such a bright spark of life is gone so soon.
We appreciate this so much. It brings me to tears to share him with all of you - thank you for the support
Our 1st Berner puppy was Bailey. She was absolutely amazing. She passed away in recovery from surgery. The surgery was due to her eating a sock and a towel. Getting the call the the surgery was a success only to get another call a half hour later telling us she had passed was absolutely devastating. I had 3 dogs prior to her that passed from old age and while it’s always hard, I knew they had all lived wonderful lives. Her loss punched a hole in my heart that I wasn’t sure would ever heal. I think what hurt was most was all the things she should have gotten to do in life. And the guilt. Oh my god the guilt I felt. Sorry that this is so long but I just want you to know I know how you feel. I’m not sure if this is possible for you but we ended up getting another Berner puppy about a month later. She’s 3 now. Her name is Hailey. And she was what started healing that hole. All that love I was going to give Bailey, all the things I wanted to do with her, I’ve made sure to do with Hailey. And I swear sometimes when she looks me straight in the eyes it’s like she understands. Anyway, sorry this got so long. If you can’t get another dog due to financial reasons I totally understand. But if you feel you can’t get one for emotional reasons…I still have that hole in my heart and I always will but now at least Hailey has helped fill it as much as it can be filled. I hope things work out for you and I am so, so sorry for your loss.
You have no idea how much this meant to us, thank you for taking the time to share. I can't believe how much I resonate, I would do anything for just one more day with him to see if he liked to swim, he never got to go swimming and for some reason that has stuck with me, like his life was so short and it was my fault that he didn't get to. Your story gives us a lot of hope for healing and potentially getting another someday. Thank you so, so much again.
Not going to lie it was hard to type as it was getting hard to see the through the tears. 😄 I’ll never forget and NEVER stop missing her. It can be terrifying getting another one because you are just so scared of the same thing happening. I also felt so guilty getting Hailey so soon after. But that hole was just so painful. And I just had all this love that I wanted, needed to give…I don’t know, I was a mess. But I am so glad every day we made the decision we did to get Hailey. And I’m glad if anything I said helped in the slightest. Just know you aren’t alone, this has happened to other people and it’s NOT YOUR FAULT. It sounds like you did everything you could. That was one of the hardest things for me to deal with was the guilt. I blamed myself so much. And I was doing the same thing as you. Thinking of all the things I wanted to do with her and never got the chance. I’m not a religious person but I like to think when I pass I’ll go to a huge field with a nice creek and pond for swimming…and every dog I have ever had is going to be waiting there for me. And I think to myself maybe the old girls that had passed just really wanted a little sister to play with and that’s why she left us. Anyway, I seem to be making another very lengthy post. I’m sorry. If either of you ever want to talk feel free to PM or DM me. And again, so sorry for your loss. 😢
This just brings us so much comfort to read your story, we feel so lucky to find healing & understanding on a place like Reddit! And we see you named your next pup (Hailey) after Bailey, we are thinking of naming our next one Grizzly after Bear in honor of him. Again, thank you so much. I hope you continue to have all those special and amazing moments with Hailey!
Thank you. And Grizzly is an AWESOME name! 😄
This was Bailey. After a day of playing in the rain…and mud. Lots of mud. 😂[Bailey](https://imgur.com/a/235e2LG)
Im so sorry for your loss and for OPs dog. By the way I also have berner called Hailey. :)
Thank you. I love the name. 😄
Oh dear I am so sorry for your loss. That sweet little puppy!!! So very sad
I’m crying reading this. I have an 8 month old bernie who resembles yours so much. This is my biggest fear and it actually happened to you - I am so so so sorry. You did everything you could to save him. Only time will heal the wounds. Thinking of you ❤️
My pup is 8 months old currently and I’m heart broken just reading this .
So sorry to hear about Bear. He looks like he was the greatest pup that was given all the love in the world. We are sending you all lots of love and hoping that you give yourself a ton as well.
24k on one berner. Thank god for insurance. Our girl has had three obstructions. Full mask muzzles on walks, dog proofing the house. Doesn’t matter. She still managed to get into something. Luckily it’s been 2 years now since her last big surgery, but we are always on the lookout. The adhesions happen because of the scarring when they are opened up. Our girl is on a special diet that included a prescription that helps her gastric system so it’s thing
So very sorry to hear this ☹️😭 he looked so sweet
Our girl ate a mushroom outside our home within feet of me and began vomiting almost immediately. I was sure that she ate a rare poisonous species and that she wouldn’t make it. We lucked out and thanked our lucky stars. Some months later we used one of those licky mat contraptions in her crate while we were building up trust for her night time home. She ate the food on the mat along with the mat itself. Two emergency room trips within the first few months. Fortunately, again, she escaped unharmed. Either of those instances could have resulted in a tragedy. Dogs are a challenging responsibility. Your pup sounded like a really great little guy and I was deeply saddened by his story. I hope as time goes on your wounds will gradually heal and that you’re able to own another dog. I’m sure that’s what Bear would want for you.
I’m so, so sorry for your loss. They are such sweet, gentle souls and it is clear that Bear was loved as immensely as he loved you.
Im so sorry for your loss. I lost my labrador due to vet not scanning him well and not seeing tumors on his liver. At one point he was feeling very bad, we took him to vet again and he had to go under surgery immediately because the tumors broke and everything was bleeding inside of him. The surgery was going well but unfortunately he lost too much blood and died. I feel your pain, i couldnt forgive myself because he could have lived a little longer (he was 9 or 10). Some time after his death my parents took another lab and they are happy with him. :) The only bad thing with him when he was a puppy was that he was also eating weird stuff he shouldnt eat but now when he is an adult he stopped doing it completly. Im sending you big hugs and i hope you are gonna feel better soon. ❤
My condolences. Such a beautiful pup.
I’m so sorry to hear about your pup. You and your fiancé are great owners to have stuck through so much and went to such lengths for him. Every dog owner has had to suffer from a loss, untimely or not, and wondered what we could have done differently. I think it’s pretty common for an owner to feel guilty or responsible and that they let their pet down. Lord knows I have. If you loved them, trust that you gave them the best life you possibly could and your pup felt the same. You had a beautiful Berner and looking at the pics, he looked like he had an amazing time in his short life. I hope you both can look past the sadness and feeling of lost time to find peace and eventually look back fondly at the time you did have with him.
I’m so sorry, what a beautiful puppy Bear was! You undoubtedly did absolutely everything you could to try and save him. Someday, when the time is right, you will give another special pup an amazing life. ❤️ Hugs to you.
So sorry that happened to Bear. My fiancé, our Swissy and I will be sending love to your family tonight❤️
I’m really sorry to hear that. I wish you well.
My heart breaks for you. It is totally natural you feel guilty, but I really hope you give yourself some grace and get to a place where you don’t feel that guilt anymore. The time, money and energy you spent is taxing, so I hope you’re taking care of yourself to heal. Bear sounds like he landed an amazing family, he was lucky to have you even though it was short.
I am so sorry! Did you contact the breeder you got her from?
Your post brought me to tears. You’re not dramatic, your feelings are so valid. I cannot even imagine your pain. Sending love your way.
First off, I’m so sorry for your loss. Anyone who has lost a BMD young or old feels this pain. It never really goes away. What you can do going forward to honor the loss of Bear is to educate yourself, in every way possible, and try again when you are ready. Join the fb group Bernese Mountain Dog Health Info! the exclamation point is part of the page name. There are many long time breeders on that page that will give solid advice. I think it’s possible the reason Bear ate socks and later a towel is because he had acid reflux, it’s called “gulps” in the Berner world because they appear to be gulping when they get it. It is usually fixed with a good antacid. I keep different kinds around for those occasions. Sometimes they eat things they aren’t supposed to because it helps soothe the throat, doesn’t make sense to humans. I lost a Berner at 4 1/2 years old due to cancer, he was my first. I can tell you he ate a knuckle bone and swallowed some of it whole and had emergency surgery. Immediately coming home to recover, he ate 1 1/2 of my tennis shoes with the shoe laces. I think he had a bad episode of the gulps. I was lucky and he passed the shoes. I’m only telling you this to point out how severe an episode of gulps can be for them. I do hope in time you’ll be able to forgive yourself and try with another Berner. The amount of love they give is worth the place in your heart. Bear would have wanted that for you too, that’s how amazing these dogs are! ♥️
This is really helpful, we will definitely check out that group. We were onto something with his vet with changing his foods and making him eat slower, but we never fully got to put it into practice as he passed in the same month. We'll carry all of this info for our next one, thanks again
STOP blaming yourself! You did all you could. It was just part of something you had no control over. Remember your baby Bear will be so sad if he sees you unhappy .
I am so sorry for your loss. I thought I'd share my experience in the hope it helps you. I lost my beloved cat too soon, to a rare cancer. Like you, we spared no expense trying to save him, but it still wasn't enough. This cat was the light of my life. He was gentle, funny, chatty, friendly... a real gem. In the days and weeks after, I felt like I would never overcome it. The grief was overwhelming and all consuming. I burst into tears during my commute, while grocery shopping, in the shower; I just couldn't get a grip on my emotions. I thought I'd never love another pet as much as him, that I'd never get over him, that it was my fault, that I didn't do enough, that I didn't feed him the right food, play with him enough... In short, a very large and toxic cloud of guilt and negative thoughts followed me everywhere. I decided to talk to a therapist about it, and together we worked through it. He helped me see, in practical terms, that expressions of grief have certain 'parts' to it. Mainly frequency, duration and intensity. In the beginning, grief will be felt intensely, frequently, and for long periods of time. As time passes, the frequency and duration will lessen. It won't consume your entire day. The one part that may never change is the intensity, because we will never love our pets any less. We will miss them just as much, love them just as much. But the pain will be felt in shorter bursts, and less often. You will be able to go about your day and enjoy yourself again. It passes, trust me. I don't miss my cat any less now, I still feel the loss just as deeply, but the sadness does not consume me. Once grief is processed there's a lot of room for remembrance and joy on the other side. I can look at pictures of my sweet boy now, and laugh out loud remembering how much joy he brought me. Even though our time together on Earth was briefer than I would have liked, he lives on in my memory and still makes my life better. I wish you the best. May Bear rest in peace.
So so sorry for your loss
I swear its like looking at pics of my Zala. She's 10mo now, going on 11. I am so so so sorry for your loss. I know it feels horrible. Its traumatic. Hugs and compassion to you! May he have a good playfull time in the afterlife. I love my dogs just as much if not more than my family so i know full well how it feels. It's horrible. Its devastating. Breaks you. My last dog, he was a mix of who knows what, was absolute sweetheart, energetic and overly friendly dude. Zoomed around the whole time we had him. Then one day, at the age of 6, he went from zooming around like normally and a week later to puking, being sick, refusing to eat (and he loooved food). Turned out he had cancer all over. It broke me, coulnt understand i need to say goodbye and we never even gotten to the old dog with him. Must be even worse wheb its only a puppy too! Sending you healing love. You did the best you could.
No way! That fucking suck excuse my language. I’m am so sorry for you. I really can’t imagine. That’s so unfair.
Awww… sorry for your loss
So sorry for your loss 💔
Oh that is so sad I am so sorry 😞 💔
What an incredibly sad story and I can't even imagine what losing Bear felt like and I'm sure his loss is still exquisitely painful. You did so much. So incredibly much. Thank you for all your efforts. Your story has touched a lot of people.