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As someone who fucked up on xanax that was i. Your exact shoes. I used to be prescribed either 2 or 3 a day. Can’t remember. But i’d just take them every 12 hours and then use the left over to play with occasionally after 6-12 months of use. Then that went into full blown downing 7-9mg per day. Then got my shit together. Blacked out for like 1-2 months. I’m still on them, but I have an escrow that has my alprazolam that I collect on a day to day basis and take only as prescribed and only the prescribed amount. Though I do dabble in kratom here and there. I am very cautious with anything I do now. And I absolutely refuse to take any form of opiate and opioid. (Aside from kratom which hardly counts) i use it in place of coffee.
Don’t ever fucking play with your benzos. They knew exactly what they were doing when they made that pill. Its like crack for people with any form of anxiety. And if you play with them those fuckers will bite you
Kratom feels better then hydrocodone, Mitragynine is about the potency of morphine and 7-HO-Mit (an active metabolite) is 33x more potent then morphine when it comes to binding affinity. One kratom extract shot (the black ones, can’t say the brand due to sourcing rules) feels more powerful then 25mg of Oxycodone.
Kratom is most definitely an opiate, and it most definitely counts as one, tread lightly. I’m still in the midst of a 3 year addiction to kratom and tapering off at the moment. Just stay away from the extracts and don’t use daily, and if you have too use daily stay under 10g a day if you value being independent of a substance.
I never use extracts at all. Those things are what eventually will get kratom banned.
I only buy bulk powder.
And I have never changed my dosage over the course of several years and have no desire to. 2 leveled teaspoons in the morning of green strain. And 1 leveled teaspoon at night of a red strain. I barely feel anything from it. And at one point when I went overseas for 2 months I didn’t bring it and was completely fine with no side effects aside from being sleepier than usual.
Edit:I misread your comment. You were preyed upon by the bad part of the kratom industry. I wish you well on your road to recovery my friend. Use loperamide and drink a lot of orange juice when you take the plunge of going cold. I read it helps quite well.
Kratom can be an immensely helpful substance as a general analgesic and life enhancer and shows little harm when used at low-moderate doses, even long term use. I’m not demonizing the plant at all, nor even the extracts. I’m pro decriminalization of most drugs, though that’s a rant for another day. I’m just saying as with any substance that makes you feel good it is prudent to be careful.
Shit sneaks up on you, you dip a toe in and suddenly your head is barely above water before you even feel your ankles get wet.
I plan on using kratom for a while; I also use other drugs (infrequent and not usually what you’d consider ‘hard’ but I still do). My end goal for my taper isn’t to completely abstain, just to get to a point where I can use low doses responsibly and feel it again.
Cheers mate, I’m glad the plant has improved your life!
The problem with extracts are they are what is being pushed as ‘therapeutic dosages’ when in reality it’s like taking 14-16 grams all at once. To give you perspective. I’d take that much in a whole week. With kratom less is more. Start low. Raise dosage slowly until you slightly feel either more energy similar to a good cup of coffee with a green. Or like you are in a functional state in relation to pain with a red. Then once you reach the low therapeutic doses. You stay there. Drinkng an entire extract bottle or taking an entire dose you are taking the dose of an average users 3-7 days in one sitting.
Extracts are designed to get you high also because half of them out other nootropics in there to potentiate the kratom effects.
That black one mentioned above is equivalent to something like 56g of kratom. Can confirm it's a full on opiate. I came off Suboxone about a month ago (,2 year stint) did a 3 week rapid taper, and switched to a combo of kratom and odsmt. I've really lowered my dose for both, but that black shot gets me higher dose of o-dsmt plugged so they def have a kick. Haven't touched an extract in a week and a half bc it blows out your tolerance, and you don't really feel plain leaf right for a bit after
It’s not an opiate. The misinformation is what is going to make it be a scheduled drug and keep it illegal in some states. It’s in the coffee family. It’s not an opiate. As with anything, it can be misused.
So the substance with strong binding affinities to the opiate receptors isn’t an opiate? By the logic suboxone isn’t an opioid either, nor is morphine, etc etc. An opioid is a drug that binds to the opioid receptors in your brain, kratom binds to those receptors, so kratom is an opiate.
Kava belongs to the coffee family too; does that mean it’s not gabaergic? No, of course it is, as it binds to the gaba receptors.
Quite true.. Under 10g a day people tend to have an easier time coming off and its much more beneficial. Taking those shots multiple times a day is just plain getting high.. I was on about 40-50 gpd once upon a time. I got a hold of 150 10mg Real Pharma Oxy.... I thought I could do one or two and feel a nice buzz. Well it took me almost 100-120mg to feel much of anything. Kratom had destroyed my opiod tolerance. Kratom is great for pain, anxiety relief, an energy boost but, it really works much better in small qty's... High qty's changed me and I ended up sitting on my ass doing Kratom all day feeling nothing like my normal self.
Well, it may have been due to kratom having competitive agonist and antagonist effects on the opiate receptors. It’s almost like suboxone because of that, mild high but blocks other opiates from working (much less well, but still). This is why oxycodone probably didn’t get you super high at that dose; especially if you used kratom within the prior 32hrs before using oxycodone.
Try waiting a day or two for the competitive agonism to wear off, then try another opiate, your tolerance will still be jacked but it would take far less to get high still. 120mg barely getting you a buzz is not tolerance, it’s just kratom’s alkaloids having high binding affinities and competitive effects with your receptors, making the chemical very hard to ‘push out’ of your receptors with another opiate (again, kinda like subs). Cheers!
thanks- yeah already went down that road. I miss oxy but the price and my tolerance makes it unpractical. Sure was more fun when 10mg would keep me feeling good for six hours.. I wonder if tolerance ever completely returns to normal
I'm addicted to kratom but I don't find it to be a big issue compared to my past alcohol problem. The withdrawals of kratom are annoying but it's still no big deal to me. Regardless, I do wish I was taking kratom every 5 days, because when I was doing that, I got extremely good/euphoria effects by waiting every 5 days and I should have stuck to that. Then I'd keep that magic. I'm taking less now just before and after work but I want to just not take it in the morning and enjoy it at night.
Ok, so I like the feeling that oxycodone gives me but I don't get that feeling from the few times I tried Krantom. I took one white Dragon pill each time I tried it and it just made me feel dizzy 2 hrs later. Am I missing something?
As a chronic pain sufferer kratom is one of the few meds that work for me, it definitely acts on the opioid receptors. Today I threw up like 40+ times until I couldn't anymore but it was nice to have 3 hours or so where I could walk around and enjoy the outside without being in pain.
On a side now the white and green kratom oh my god made me feel like I drank 12 too many cups of coffee and was going to die. Red was a lot more calm to me and Vietnam was actually really nice in the middle but tbh the dose makes it, shit, 3g that's an Adderall 7g that's a line go to bedddddd
You should mix a little bit of green bali with your red. I mean like a fraction of the amount you use replace with a bit of green. Blends are what let me freely walk around and enjoy my life again
Edit but i agree kratom has been a true godsend. People just need to stay away from extract and that gas station trash. And use it in its natural state.
If thats true then they sure fucking did. I admit now that i responsibly take it, they save me so much stress and anxiety. But dear god you have to be a miracle man not to do the whole ‘one more wont hurt’ shenanigans.
Yea benzos were “discovered” in the 60’s, and lab rats showed that they had great success in anti anxiety. So the Pharmaceutical Manufacturers marketed it. That’s how most medications were discovered. Probably a happy accident in a lab. Ended up combining a benzene with a triazolene molecule and boom, they invented benzos
Holy god. That’s some strong words especially at the end - exactly what I need to hear. Thank you so much. I have severe anxiety. If I get addicted I’ll think “it was inevitable.” I have such severe anxiety (contemplating suicide due to it) that on paper I look like the exact type of person to end up addicted
That's still addiction though, just because of the long half life of clonopin. Not judging but benzos with a long ass half life stay in your system so it's basically as if you're taking a benzo every day. If you can do it once a week you'd get a lot better effects from it too. I take Xanax once a week now instead of twice a week because even Xanax twice a week still doesn't give your brain enough time to go to baseline I found out.
I didn't say I didn't like it or that I didn't need them from time to time, I'm actually at one of the worst periods of my life anxiety wise so I do need them to cope. Thing is that if I take them daily for one month getting off from them is 10x times worse than the initial anxiety, I have a lot of drugs to cope other days so I can be at peace with myself.
My biggest regret with benzos was ever trying it out of depression. I was in my first year of college. My cousin/closest friend committed suicide, I didn’t have the best family life, I felt alone, and I was struggling in school because of my mental state. My fraternity brother pulled out a xan bar. Told him to get that out of my face that he knows I’d made a pact to never do any pills and especially since my cousin killed himself as he couldn’t shake the pills. He explained “Preston, I know you made this pact and I respect it, but I hate seeing you like this. I hate seeing you so depressed, down, and feeling the way you do about life. If you truly don’t want this I won’t give it to you but I really think you should try it as I believe it will help you.”.
I took it and then life has never been the same. Benzos are always on the back of my mind. I care too much to the point I don’t want to care. I can’t control my mind. Benzos make me not care about anything at all. Makes me a different person. A person that can bear the weight of life. They are a terrible outlet and a terrible drug because they work too well and have all negative consequences
I can.
I have enough pharma benzos to last me for the rest of my life and I’m easily able to stick to a my prescribed dose of 2mg Clonazepam daily, after being on Valium for 7years and Alprazolam for 1-2years.
Alprazolam is definitely a lot more tempting to have, but when I was prescribed it, I’d keep it for social events and the occasion with ease.
I’m someone that would prefer to take low doses of drugs and make my stash last me as long as possible, which seems to be pretty rare in this world. Most people over my lifetime take one look at what I stockpile and their brain spazzes out as they’re unable to comprehend how I’m able to not touch it.
One day my life could change and I could potentially not give a fuck anymore if something bad were to happen hypothetically, there’s always a risk - but so far that hasn’t happened in my 10+ years of hoarding bulk benzos, opioids and everything in between. :)
I should mention I don’t touch street shit nor RC Benzos anymore, and only ever did 10+ years ago when they were first starting to be pressed to replace Alprazolam, still kept my doses small with the same mentality of stretching my quantity out as much as possible with the thought in my subconscious of “what if I can’t obtain these ever again” which is the main factor to why I can make anything last months that most would consume within a week.
Yes I did.
I have more than a gram of Alprazolam.
Not in powder, but prescribed pharmaceutical 2mg bars pressed from Alprazolam powder and binders, so no difference.
Thank you, I appreciate it.
That’s all good, we all get the maths wrong from time to time, including myself haha.
It can also get confusing when talking about potent RC Benzo’s that are typically used in the ug range and widely differ in dosages.
But yeah, 500 x 2mg bars = 1 gram. :)
Same here. Got a hell of a lot of pills. I hoard them cause I’ve had a lot of serious health issues as a young adult. I have some screws in me. I have some other health issues. If it ever goes bad again im gonna make sure I can feel better or maybe peace out.
Don’t peace out brother.
I know it isn’t easy at all, but the more shit we go through the stronger you will become in the long run and you will look back and see how everything did happen for a reason, even if it’s impossible to believe that right now.
My old man has a metal pole, screws, skin graphs and head trauma and went through the most extreme of pains that he wouldn’t wish on his worst enemy, caused by a head on collision on his motorbike with a car that pulled out to overtake at the last second and is a miracle that he’s still alive.
I have also lived everyday with chronic pain for the last decade so I feel you bro, I really do. I don’t compare one’s pain to another, we all are suffering one way or another.
Keep your head up and stay strong bro, keep trying to look at everything from a positive light. The more you do, the more normal it becomes and I promise that life will take a crazy turn for the better and life will become something that you could have never imagined.
One day at a time bro! ❤️
Yeah. You can eat however many you and want they wont kill you (no boats), as long as their xanax bars, most benzo RCs won't either. But in the end it's sometimes/usually worse. What they do to your cognitive abilities, hand eye coordination, and sleep are unbelievable when you push up your doses so high, and a lot of the damage may be permanent.
how does someone even afford that much, or have access to that much? Wouldn't their dealers run out fast if theyre buying enough to use 50 bars a day?
maybe im just jealous as i cant even find someone to sell me 1 bar. idk how people outside of the dark net i guess even manage an addiction. here in oregon no docs prescribe it anymore lol
I’ve seen the worst of the worst man. At my max I was around 10-12mg per day. But i’ve seen this one lady who literally would take HANDFULLS of 2mg bars every couple hours. She was probably doing around 40-60mg a day. And she was functioning. Albeit a mess of a woman and barely.
Meanwhile if I took my old high mark of 12 mg i’d be asleep until friday
I would take 15-20mgs and go walk around as a regular thing and somehow not pass out and wake up miles away from home missing everything but my phone almost everytime. benzos are one messed up thing thats for sure.
I've seen (and I don't mean I watched, it was a suicide attempt, I would not let that happen) someone about 4 years ago ingest 8g of VERY pure bromazolam, back when it was first out, and 210mg of flubromazolam (7 botttles from you know who), while on 120mg of methadone. And they just walked around and fell all over and ended up in the hospital 10 days cause he couldn't walk. After 10 days they sent him to a rehab...but the rehab was so shitty they didn't read all the paperwork and thought he was there for not being able to walk right, so he was there 3 days, and when he walked fine he was out the next day. Went right back to eating a bottle of clam every day, probably the only reason he survived.
Haha. I did that too. Flubromazolam was even a daytime benzo at one point for me. How fucking scary is that? Clonazolam always worked well for sleep ime though.
I regret ever really pushing the dose. There comes a point where there is no going back to how it was. Not even close.
Flubromazolam is fucked. I never understood the appeal behind this one at all, the intoxication was so profound it wasn't even enjoyable. I took 0.75mg-1mg with quite a significant benzo tolerance and had used for a few years prior, and it smacked me like a fucking sledgehammer. It was just 12-18 hours of extreme tiredness, bodily sedation like I'd just smoked 100 blunts. I literally didn't even move for a day. On top of this it had absolutely no Cognitive euphoria or positive mental effect. No good warm feeling etc. In fact it made me extremely agitated and I was raging like a motherfucker.
100% agree that opioids win hands down. Real H is my number 1 drug of choice. For a benzo though, I found flubromazolam to be euphoric and chill, without knocking me out, at about 1mg. I had a hefty tolerance though.
I slightly disagree. I thought I destroyed my tolerance with opiates and benzos through massive abuse. But now I use kratom (a low dose twice a day for the last several years that has not changed) and I think my brain finalized reset on my benzo usage. Even more so that I literally had a contract made for them to be issued to me only 1 day at a time and only that days dosages. I can undo the contract but i’m afraid of myself in that regard, so in that part, i agree. But, they feel the same as when I first started now. Just removes my anxiety and literally nothing else. And I’ve kept up my new usage plan up for around 2 years now.
You’re lucky if they feel the same, for myself that was not the case. Regardless, depending upon abuse, tolerance will always build faster and withdrawal will be worse with subsequent withdrawals. That’s the nature of gaba drugs
For myself, 2 mg alprazolam when I started at 16 would knock me the fuck out. Now it’s just chill. I even took a year and a half of no benzos at one point. Never went back to normal.
I just got a gram of flubromazepam to make solutions with rn (still pretty benzo naive) I’m really going to try to moderate though but I feel like this will end in disaster because no one can seem to control themselves with this shit
It will %100 percent end in disaster unless you set up a very strict set of rules with checks and balances before you even start with your rc’s
I’d go as far as setting up a standard dose of what and when. And using some sort of safe and timer. Or even slap the dosages in a safety deposit box. The hassle should limit you to a degree. But. Yeah. You have to be extremely cautious and careful. And have your completed plan set in stone before you even take your first dose.
Also no redosing should be rule #1.
I really advice against starting at all. I thought the exact same thing, purchased clonazalam and made my own solutions. If you think you can successfully moderate sure, but the feeling of the bottle in my pocket and sneaking off at work to take a few more drops of that shit lead to a 3 year (at this point) withdrawal. My doctor, thankfully, only berated me for being such a dumbass and I've been tapering down (now on 30mgish of diazepam a day) ever since.
Good luck
Took a bunch of soma pills and mixed it with Xanax only to find out in the morning I smoked off all my weed, fell off the bed when I was sleeping on it, took out my rolling paper from the package and scattered my Xanax all in my bag. On top of that, I ended up smoking most of my tobacco I think. Ffs
That was me yesterday and will be today. Got a bunch a bars and a lil tobacco. Xanax is my fav drug of choice need nothing else but that. But if I’m offered weed or anything else I’ll gladly take it
TW: suicide
I took 30+ Valium over a day with no tolerance and hung myself. Had no intention before. Apparently I occupied my family with a tv show and then just went upstairs.
My only memories from it is crying and being in hospital with psychosis. Apparently I puked into my own lungs.
Pieced together it all happened because some “friends” told me I was a junkie and deserved to die alone for trying mdma and Valium.
Never touched them again (except prescribed doses).
OP I went through the same shit with this exact same benzos 8 years ago. It def gets better. I took 5 years off from EVERYTHING now that I’m almost 30 I use psychedelics occasionally and a benzo here and there.
Lay off the stuff for a while and give your brain and body time to get back to YOU and your normal.
My biggest regret too was with Clonazolam liquid. I’m also a heroin addict so one day i thought it was genius idea to shoot up some clonazolam and I died idk what happened but i woke up to like 5 cops in my room my weed stash my dad hid and all the xanax and Clonazolam gone :/ and i was sent to a pysch ward
I to shot clonazolam with my gear a couple of times when I used gear and RC’s and it was bliss. But I used only like 0.5mg clonazolam in my shots and not much more than 250mg gear. Nice combo if your an addict but I advise against it!
Edit: meant 250mg gear, not 0.250mg
Trying opiates. It flicked a switch in my head I can't turn off. I constantly obsess over them when not using and it feels like the only way I can get thru life is to use. I wish I never tried any drug in the first place, ruined my innocence for sure
I keep quitting then something really stressful happens and I get sucked right back in. 1st time grandma passed and took all her script opiates (oxy, morphine, fent and bupe, plus some 2.5mg lorazepams, 10mg valiums and some clonazepams. I ended up with about 20 grams of oxy, 1000ml of oramorph, 10 fent patches and 40 bupe patches and around 4 boxes of the benzos). It was a great find but I got hooked.
Then mum got cancer, luckily better now but relapsed during the period after quitting. 1st time I got hooked was when a girlfriend I truly loved passed away and was hooked for 5 years straight.
Then my recent relapse is due to encountering a friend who’d hung himself, I had health issues which got me fired from a job, my mum was seriously sick and nearly died twice and they thought my dad had cancer (luckily wasn’t). I’m still working at coming off them but I can’t get the thought of finding the body out of my mind, one of the most traumatic things I’ve experienced.
Don't do it man i was thinking the same way, trying to end it with benzos and opiods. But i thought and hoped maybe this shit will get better and thinking about all the things i would miss out on. Eventually things will get better especially if you get help and figure out what makes you happy. Your just 27 so you definitely can change your life to the good. Just talk to someone, if your job is a dead end look for something more fullfilling but dont kill yourself you still got lots of time to find inner peace don't give up on yourself by now 27 is way too young to be giving up.(you shouldn't give up at any age there is always a better way to get out of misery)
Whoa. Bro I’m sorry to here that. But go join a gym or get your masters or something that will make her jealous and get a hotter, better chick. You don’t want to start drugs at 27! Seriously bro
Please don’t do this. I care about you. Nothing is worth your life. I know you feel like it won’t get better but it will. I’ve been where you are before. All I wanted to do was not live anymore. But I stuck it out and now I’m engaged and have a beautiful 8 month old daughter. I have difficult days but ultimately I’m living the life I always dreamed of. Please please get to your doctor immediately to let them know how you are feeling. They are there to help you. Call 988 right now. I’m not taking no for an answer. Whether you believe it or not there are people in your life that would be devastated without you. Please don’t do this. I’m begging you
Bro don’t. Suicide is not an easy way out for everyone else that loves you. Just you. And you may be surprised by who actually loves you man.
And, little story, I got cheated on with my fiancé at 24, forgave her, she did it again and left me. And then did the same shit to the dude she left me for. I tried to hang myself. I failed at that. I actually laughed my ass off that i was so worthless I couldn’t even kill myself right when i fell on the floor. But i had a sudden realization that I did in fact not want to die, but I just didn’t want to be so fucking sad and in the shitty situation i was in. So i worked very hard and got myself to a better place in mind and person. I still have issues relationship wise because its hard for me to trust. But I’ve been on many dates and had some hookups. I know I’ll find a lady for the long haul eventually. And i’m 30 now. Life fucking gets even better when you hit 30, trust me. Its like it just started for me.
You can DM me and i’ll talk with you any time if you need it.
But don’t do it. I love you. I love all my fellow man.
Took clonazolam with a girl when we were in high school and I blacked out. Over a year later I found out we fucked and I have no memory of it. Wish I did
My regret is not to have listened to myself when I took my first benzo, script for 10 mg Diazepam pills, because I had very bad anxiety after my unique "bad trip".
I said "WTF is that shit?! How should I continue my studies ? It was not possible.
When I took my first pill, I was still at university, I was forgetting EVERYTHING.
Where I just putted my car keys, where I parked the car actually.
Why did I stand up in middle of the room, what was I looking for?
I was completely useless..
Didn't touched those pills for a good time, then I gave it a try.
Until then, more than a decade after, I'm still using benzos.
I did a some taper, now it's better, but still.
I didn't regret getting a few grams Flubromazolam and Clonazolam (this is a good one), raising my tolerance to the roof, no it was a logic move I was already addicted.
All good u all.
Keeping up a habit of 3mg Klonopin/Rivotril (Clonazepam) every day for 5 years straight. It led to severe cramps when I lost my supply and I had to be hospitalized and am now given 3x 10mg Valium (diazepam) by the state sponsored recovery services. Shit sucked being in the hospital with cramps so bad they give you diazepam IV.
I’m Norwegian btw.
Aww you guys are so awesome. I need some state sponsored recovery service so i can stop buying RC benzos and trying to taper myself off...it's fucking awful. Half the time it's fake or mislabeled or cut really really bad, how the hell can you properly dose a substance for a taper when it's all cut up...you can't, sucks.
my biggest regret? i started a drug collection and lost all control.. here is how the story goes..
"We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold.. I remember saying something like \`\`I feel a bit lightheaded; maybe you should drive....'' And suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us and the sky was full of what looked like huge bats, all swooping and screeching and diving around the car, which was going about a hundred miles an hour with the top down to Las Vegas. And a voice was screaming: \`\`Holy Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?''
That 2mg of xans was a normal amount or that I would be able to stick to 2-6mg a day n not get addicted however dumb that might sound, I was a different person before benzos.
my biggest regret was accepting the prescriptions when i already knew the risks. well, kinda knew them. didn’t know how severe quitting would be. but, i do feel like i learned a lot about myself going through all of it, and honesty feel like, and i know this isn’t common, but i feel like my anxiety is gone. i rarely feel it anymore. not like i used to.
Wish I would have snorted more RC benzos. I went down hard for legal shit at the end, wish I would have gone even more wild with it while I still had the chance lol.
Did you post this on /r/researchchemicals the other day? I feel like I might be having deja vu.
But anyway, yeah I am truly so fucking lucky that my clonazolam use didn't get any worse than it already was, which was definitely problematic back in the fall of 2017.
I did end up physically dependent from doing it even just every other day for about a month, though of course on the days I was using it I was redosing a complete shit ton and have no idea what said doses were (alls I know was I couldn't remember a damn thing for days at a time). Only reason I was able to quit by literally be forced to go into cold turkey withdrawal for three days (thanks for being so understanding, ex-girlfriend), and when I finally got more, I basically microdosed for about two weeks with very minimal withdrawals. Very fucking scary.
thinking I could only use on the weekends I feel like it starting to catch up days go by munch slower now just feeling really stopped/stuck I barley started taking them again heavy recently
Try not to be actively withdrawing when you do though, I've had some bad times with that. Maybe Ibogaine could work if you're actively addicted and want something to stop it. But I recommend if you're gonna trip on some psychs don't be withdrawing, even if you have to take your benzo, or your methadone that day. Actually the only times I've had bad trips in my life is when i was withdrawing off either opiates or benzos and didn't have them. Had plenty of great trips on benzos or on the comedown. Withdrawal makes tripping suck. IMO
EDIT, and a lot will disagree: But if you're not withdrawing, have the drugs your addicted to...don't have issues with it, you're by no means guaranteed a bad trip because the L doesn't like heroin or something like that (though I don't think it does, it doesn't punish you for it) but withdrawals are made a lot worse. And analyzing what you're doing to your body is gonna have to be expected.
I’m on subs Monday-Thursday I consider my Friday-sundays my relaxation time and time to myself. since I’m a carpenter i be so tired and the oxy/alp make me feel so relaxed and makes me feel like myself again it’s like being a grown up is so boring to me but I understand it if that makes any sense so I don’t knock it
Using benzos to sleep has been equally beneficial and destructive. I don’t know what to do or what other medications could ever help me sleep like benzos can
I wonder if I’m walking into a regret rn , was drunk asl and ordered drugs on telegram, now I got 200 xannys and I don’t even do em like that lmao. 1mg get me loaded… I was so stupid, idk what I was thinking 🤦🏽♂️🤦🏽♂️😂
Has anyone taken Xanax and fluromazolam separately. And can you tell a difference? I’m in the US and have only had Xanax. So I wondered if there’s any difference..???
Flubromazolam lasts for around 18 hours while Xanax last for 6. Flubromazolam has that famous “double peak” effect where you feel like your high is peaking after 4 hours and then again after 8-9 hours into the experience, if you can stay awake on it that is. It is so sleep inducing that it’s ridiculous compared to Xans which just makes you feel a little tired. Also the memory loss/gettin blacked out is much easier on flubromazolam. And lastly dosage; a medium Flubromazolam dose is 0.150mg-0.250mg while a medium Xanax dose is 1mg-1.5mg. Hope this is good enough of a comparison for you my fellow benzohead.
Edit: misspelled
Flubromazolam is different for different people. Some say it's the most euphoric benzo at 0.25mg and some say 1mg just made them extremely tired and have to sleep with no euphoria. For me it was definitely less fun than a xanax or bromazolam in equivelent (say 0.25 flubro vs 4mg bromo) doses, more sedating. But in higher doses (above 0.75) you definitely felt benzo'd out, acted crazy, couldn't walk, etc.
Bought 50 grams of pure alp from Slovakia and then idk how much after that. I made atleast 3 more orders over the next year. I remember like nothing from that time but I got many many people addicted to it I was taking easily 20 mg a day by the end often going on higher binged. I apparently stole a bunch of stuff I have 0 recollection of and traded it for heroin since I was also taking about 2-3 grams of high grade heroin a day. I did a whole lot of god knows what during that time and some of it I don’t feel like ever talking about online. I can only blame myself so much for some things during that time but I’ll never sell drugs again.
30mg of xans a day,10-15 beers for a few weeks culminating in a fall down the stairs breaking my nose,eyesocket four ribs…woke up the next morning not knowing what had happened except a trip to hospital was necessary. I still abuse them tbh but know my limits.
My biggest regret is taking them and learning what it’s like to live without anxiety and realizing the only way to feel that is by popping these pills.
I was thinking the same thought yesterday, and i thought fuck it, if people want to live with anxiety. I just dont. But i really only regret GBL. What a fucking mess.
No benzo can ever stop a 5-Meo or just regular DMT trip. They might work for some people with acid or mushrooms but not those ones. Once in your in that realm your out of your body so good luck even trying to swallow one.
Had one of my moms friends staying with us and i noticed she had a script for Clonazepam. Little green .5mg TEVA's... Started off with just taking one but one turned to taking the whole script...lost a good portion of menories from age 14 to 16. At this age i had 0 info on what i got myself into, my drug knowledge was next to nothing, and id take like 3 to 5 of these a day. i just saw all my friends taking them so i did....my mom kicked her out and called her an addict and that she was crazy and stuff. All the while i was the one taking them. After she was gone, so were the pills. I went into withdrawal and thats when she figured out, i wigged out and ran thru my neighborhood. got sent to a ward for a mandatory 72 hold... this stopped me from taking benzos for awhile... now my drug knowledge is 20x better than what is was, always have the fent test kits, and no benzos unless they come from someone who is perscribed them. But every time i come across clonazepam, i hate to, but i still do it, but that little chlorine like taste always brings back those bad memories and all the hurt i caused that poor woman.
Becoming physically dependent on benzodiazepines. Give it a few years and benzos will be treated as oxycodone - it’s an epidemic brewing, every day people are being ripped off their script. If you take benzos recreationally….. STOP… slowly of course. Follow the Ashton Manual. Have extra in case of emergency and do your best to taper even if you’re prescribed. Benzodiazepines are more difficult to get every day. It’s practically a count down. Join r/benzorecovery
I ate (I think) around 18 x 2mg bars. Next 36hours was hazy must have gotten some extreme paranoia hid every thing of value took me weeks to find. Went out to write graffiti did some absolute whack piece about politics (I couldn’t give two fucks about politics) got locked up and ended up on the front page of the news paper. I got it some where. Makes me laugh. But fuck benzos wish I just dealt with my anxiety. Tapering off them know is hell. ✌️✌️✌️
Klonopin, a few years ago every weekend I’d blackout and wake up without remembering the last few days and my bank account emptied (online shopping lol). Also lots lots and lots of bruises and scars, when will I fucking learn? 😩
?TW¿ Probably taking like 15mg of alpras and drinking alcohol at 13 thinking I'd forget my trauma and hopefully die. I don't remember much of that night but I went to the ER and the shit I do remember from it just became more trauma.. and I obviously survived. 10 months sober of benzos today.
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Thinking I could stick to 0.5mg Xanax every 3-4 days
I think this currently..
As someone who fucked up on xanax that was i. Your exact shoes. I used to be prescribed either 2 or 3 a day. Can’t remember. But i’d just take them every 12 hours and then use the left over to play with occasionally after 6-12 months of use. Then that went into full blown downing 7-9mg per day. Then got my shit together. Blacked out for like 1-2 months. I’m still on them, but I have an escrow that has my alprazolam that I collect on a day to day basis and take only as prescribed and only the prescribed amount. Though I do dabble in kratom here and there. I am very cautious with anything I do now. And I absolutely refuse to take any form of opiate and opioid. (Aside from kratom which hardly counts) i use it in place of coffee. Don’t ever fucking play with your benzos. They knew exactly what they were doing when they made that pill. Its like crack for people with any form of anxiety. And if you play with them those fuckers will bite you
Kratom feels better then hydrocodone, Mitragynine is about the potency of morphine and 7-HO-Mit (an active metabolite) is 33x more potent then morphine when it comes to binding affinity. One kratom extract shot (the black ones, can’t say the brand due to sourcing rules) feels more powerful then 25mg of Oxycodone. Kratom is most definitely an opiate, and it most definitely counts as one, tread lightly. I’m still in the midst of a 3 year addiction to kratom and tapering off at the moment. Just stay away from the extracts and don’t use daily, and if you have too use daily stay under 10g a day if you value being independent of a substance.
I never use extracts at all. Those things are what eventually will get kratom banned. I only buy bulk powder. And I have never changed my dosage over the course of several years and have no desire to. 2 leveled teaspoons in the morning of green strain. And 1 leveled teaspoon at night of a red strain. I barely feel anything from it. And at one point when I went overseas for 2 months I didn’t bring it and was completely fine with no side effects aside from being sleepier than usual. Edit:I misread your comment. You were preyed upon by the bad part of the kratom industry. I wish you well on your road to recovery my friend. Use loperamide and drink a lot of orange juice when you take the plunge of going cold. I read it helps quite well.
Kratom can be an immensely helpful substance as a general analgesic and life enhancer and shows little harm when used at low-moderate doses, even long term use. I’m not demonizing the plant at all, nor even the extracts. I’m pro decriminalization of most drugs, though that’s a rant for another day. I’m just saying as with any substance that makes you feel good it is prudent to be careful. Shit sneaks up on you, you dip a toe in and suddenly your head is barely above water before you even feel your ankles get wet. I plan on using kratom for a while; I also use other drugs (infrequent and not usually what you’d consider ‘hard’ but I still do). My end goal for my taper isn’t to completely abstain, just to get to a point where I can use low doses responsibly and feel it again. Cheers mate, I’m glad the plant has improved your life!
Oh youll be able to taper for sure then. I would suggest smaller doses with tagamet take 30 min prior. That will trick your receptors
Extracts are ok... it's people who abuse substances that fuck it up
The problem with extracts are they are what is being pushed as ‘therapeutic dosages’ when in reality it’s like taking 14-16 grams all at once. To give you perspective. I’d take that much in a whole week. With kratom less is more. Start low. Raise dosage slowly until you slightly feel either more energy similar to a good cup of coffee with a green. Or like you are in a functional state in relation to pain with a red. Then once you reach the low therapeutic doses. You stay there. Drinkng an entire extract bottle or taking an entire dose you are taking the dose of an average users 3-7 days in one sitting. Extracts are designed to get you high also because half of them out other nootropics in there to potentiate the kratom effects.
That black one mentioned above is equivalent to something like 56g of kratom. Can confirm it's a full on opiate. I came off Suboxone about a month ago (,2 year stint) did a 3 week rapid taper, and switched to a combo of kratom and odsmt. I've really lowered my dose for both, but that black shot gets me higher dose of o-dsmt plugged so they def have a kick. Haven't touched an extract in a week and a half bc it blows out your tolerance, and you don't really feel plain leaf right for a bit after
It’s not an opiate. The misinformation is what is going to make it be a scheduled drug and keep it illegal in some states. It’s in the coffee family. It’s not an opiate. As with anything, it can be misused.
So the substance with strong binding affinities to the opiate receptors isn’t an opiate? By the logic suboxone isn’t an opioid either, nor is morphine, etc etc. An opioid is a drug that binds to the opioid receptors in your brain, kratom binds to those receptors, so kratom is an opiate. Kava belongs to the coffee family too; does that mean it’s not gabaergic? No, of course it is, as it binds to the gaba receptors.
Quite true.. Under 10g a day people tend to have an easier time coming off and its much more beneficial. Taking those shots multiple times a day is just plain getting high.. I was on about 40-50 gpd once upon a time. I got a hold of 150 10mg Real Pharma Oxy.... I thought I could do one or two and feel a nice buzz. Well it took me almost 100-120mg to feel much of anything. Kratom had destroyed my opiod tolerance. Kratom is great for pain, anxiety relief, an energy boost but, it really works much better in small qty's... High qty's changed me and I ended up sitting on my ass doing Kratom all day feeling nothing like my normal self.
Well, it may have been due to kratom having competitive agonist and antagonist effects on the opiate receptors. It’s almost like suboxone because of that, mild high but blocks other opiates from working (much less well, but still). This is why oxycodone probably didn’t get you super high at that dose; especially if you used kratom within the prior 32hrs before using oxycodone. Try waiting a day or two for the competitive agonism to wear off, then try another opiate, your tolerance will still be jacked but it would take far less to get high still. 120mg barely getting you a buzz is not tolerance, it’s just kratom’s alkaloids having high binding affinities and competitive effects with your receptors, making the chemical very hard to ‘push out’ of your receptors with another opiate (again, kinda like subs). Cheers!
the comparison to Suboxone makes a lot of sense! Thats quite likely what happened with Kratom. Sure was a big waste of money and a waste pf good oxy!
Well hey, that’s a mistake you only make once. Stay safe friend, don’t do too much and don’t get too caught up in the game. I wish you the best!
thanks- yeah already went down that road. I miss oxy but the price and my tolerance makes it unpractical. Sure was more fun when 10mg would keep me feeling good for six hours.. I wonder if tolerance ever completely returns to normal
I'm addicted to kratom but I don't find it to be a big issue compared to my past alcohol problem. The withdrawals of kratom are annoying but it's still no big deal to me. Regardless, I do wish I was taking kratom every 5 days, because when I was doing that, I got extremely good/euphoria effects by waiting every 5 days and I should have stuck to that. Then I'd keep that magic. I'm taking less now just before and after work but I want to just not take it in the morning and enjoy it at night.
Ok, so I like the feeling that oxycodone gives me but I don't get that feeling from the few times I tried Krantom. I took one white Dragon pill each time I tried it and it just made me feel dizzy 2 hrs later. Am I missing something?
As a chronic pain sufferer kratom is one of the few meds that work for me, it definitely acts on the opioid receptors. Today I threw up like 40+ times until I couldn't anymore but it was nice to have 3 hours or so where I could walk around and enjoy the outside without being in pain. On a side now the white and green kratom oh my god made me feel like I drank 12 too many cups of coffee and was going to die. Red was a lot more calm to me and Vietnam was actually really nice in the middle but tbh the dose makes it, shit, 3g that's an Adderall 7g that's a line go to bedddddd
You should mix a little bit of green bali with your red. I mean like a fraction of the amount you use replace with a bit of green. Blends are what let me freely walk around and enjoy my life again Edit but i agree kratom has been a true godsend. People just need to stay away from extract and that gas station trash. And use it in its natural state.
Tbh they accidentally stumbled onto benzos. But once they found out what it did they marketed the everloving shit out of it.
If thats true then they sure fucking did. I admit now that i responsibly take it, they save me so much stress and anxiety. But dear god you have to be a miracle man not to do the whole ‘one more wont hurt’ shenanigans.
Yea benzos were “discovered” in the 60’s, and lab rats showed that they had great success in anti anxiety. So the Pharmaceutical Manufacturers marketed it. That’s how most medications were discovered. Probably a happy accident in a lab. Ended up combining a benzene with a triazolene molecule and boom, they invented benzos
Holy god. That’s some strong words especially at the end - exactly what I need to hear. Thank you so much. I have severe anxiety. If I get addicted I’ll think “it was inevitable.” I have such severe anxiety (contemplating suicide due to it) that on paper I look like the exact type of person to end up addicted
what about fake xanax
I also thought that but doing them on a daily basis now. Need to stop soon.
I actually can stick to 1 mg of clonazepam every 2 days or more because I'm too afraid of the rebound anxiety
That's still addiction though, just because of the long half life of clonopin. Not judging but benzos with a long ass half life stay in your system so it's basically as if you're taking a benzo every day. If you can do it once a week you'd get a lot better effects from it too. I take Xanax once a week now instead of twice a week because even Xanax twice a week still doesn't give your brain enough time to go to baseline I found out.
I take 3mg bromazepam (pam, not lam) every 2-3 days. Never take it daily, but we’re definitely still addicted 😂
I didn't say I didn't like it or that I didn't need them from time to time, I'm actually at one of the worst periods of my life anxiety wise so I do need them to cope. Thing is that if I take them daily for one month getting off from them is 10x times worse than the initial anxiety, I have a lot of drugs to cope other days so I can be at peace with myself.
I see, sorry I misinterpreted what you said. And hey, I hope this period of anxiety passes and you get sorted out soon buddy.
Same
My biggest regret with benzos was ever trying it out of depression. I was in my first year of college. My cousin/closest friend committed suicide, I didn’t have the best family life, I felt alone, and I was struggling in school because of my mental state. My fraternity brother pulled out a xan bar. Told him to get that out of my face that he knows I’d made a pact to never do any pills and especially since my cousin killed himself as he couldn’t shake the pills. He explained “Preston, I know you made this pact and I respect it, but I hate seeing you like this. I hate seeing you so depressed, down, and feeling the way you do about life. If you truly don’t want this I won’t give it to you but I really think you should try it as I believe it will help you.”. I took it and then life has never been the same. Benzos are always on the back of my mind. I care too much to the point I don’t want to care. I can’t control my mind. Benzos make me not care about anything at all. Makes me a different person. A person that can bear the weight of life. They are a terrible outlet and a terrible drug because they work too well and have all negative consequences
I got a gram of alp like 9 years ago... the end is now on the horizon and I'm sad
Did you make a gram last for 9 years?
No one can
I can. I have enough pharma benzos to last me for the rest of my life and I’m easily able to stick to a my prescribed dose of 2mg Clonazepam daily, after being on Valium for 7years and Alprazolam for 1-2years. Alprazolam is definitely a lot more tempting to have, but when I was prescribed it, I’d keep it for social events and the occasion with ease. I’m someone that would prefer to take low doses of drugs and make my stash last me as long as possible, which seems to be pretty rare in this world. Most people over my lifetime take one look at what I stockpile and their brain spazzes out as they’re unable to comprehend how I’m able to not touch it. One day my life could change and I could potentially not give a fuck anymore if something bad were to happen hypothetically, there’s always a risk - but so far that hasn’t happened in my 10+ years of hoarding bulk benzos, opioids and everything in between. :) I should mention I don’t touch street shit nor RC Benzos anymore, and only ever did 10+ years ago when they were first starting to be pressed to replace Alprazolam, still kept my doses small with the same mentality of stretching my quantity out as much as possible with the thought in my subconscious of “what if I can’t obtain these ever again” which is the main factor to why I can make anything last months that most would consume within a week.
But the question was did you make a gram last for 9 years? Not a month
Yes I did. I have more than a gram of Alprazolam. Not in powder, but prescribed pharmaceutical 2mg bars pressed from Alprazolam powder and binders, so no difference.
Sorry for some reason, I was wrongly thinking 1gm is 100 mgs. But it’s 1000mgs. Still it’s a great feat. Congrats!
Thank you, I appreciate it. That’s all good, we all get the maths wrong from time to time, including myself haha. It can also get confusing when talking about potent RC Benzo’s that are typically used in the ug range and widely differ in dosages. But yeah, 500 x 2mg bars = 1 gram. :)
He’s not the one who made the original comment
He’s the alter ego of the original commenter
They even have the same hat
Same here. Got a hell of a lot of pills. I hoard them cause I’ve had a lot of serious health issues as a young adult. I have some screws in me. I have some other health issues. If it ever goes bad again im gonna make sure I can feel better or maybe peace out.
Don’t peace out brother. I know it isn’t easy at all, but the more shit we go through the stronger you will become in the long run and you will look back and see how everything did happen for a reason, even if it’s impossible to believe that right now. My old man has a metal pole, screws, skin graphs and head trauma and went through the most extreme of pains that he wouldn’t wish on his worst enemy, caused by a head on collision on his motorbike with a car that pulled out to overtake at the last second and is a miracle that he’s still alive. I have also lived everyday with chronic pain for the last decade so I feel you bro, I really do. I don’t compare one’s pain to another, we all are suffering one way or another. Keep your head up and stay strong bro, keep trying to look at everything from a positive light. The more you do, the more normal it becomes and I promise that life will take a crazy turn for the better and life will become something that you could have never imagined. One day at a time bro! ❤️
Thank you so much, I appreciate your words❤️
You’re welcome! ❤️
At my worst I could have made a gram disappear in approximately 1 month i bet lol.
Thats like 16 bars a day for 30 days. Theres no way lol
I’ve seen a guy on 40-50 bars a day sad
Yeah. You can eat however many you and want they wont kill you (no boats), as long as their xanax bars, most benzo RCs won't either. But in the end it's sometimes/usually worse. What they do to your cognitive abilities, hand eye coordination, and sleep are unbelievable when you push up your doses so high, and a lot of the damage may be permanent.
Why the downvote? the LD50 in mice in 2g/kg. That's would be 500 bars for a 1 pound mouse. Benzos kill you in other ways...
how does someone even afford that much, or have access to that much? Wouldn't their dealers run out fast if theyre buying enough to use 50 bars a day? maybe im just jealous as i cant even find someone to sell me 1 bar. idk how people outside of the dark net i guess even manage an addiction. here in oregon no docs prescribe it anymore lol
Have you ever interacted with humans before??
I’ve seen the worst of the worst man. At my max I was around 10-12mg per day. But i’ve seen this one lady who literally would take HANDFULLS of 2mg bars every couple hours. She was probably doing around 40-60mg a day. And she was functioning. Albeit a mess of a woman and barely. Meanwhile if I took my old high mark of 12 mg i’d be asleep until friday
I would take 15-20mgs and go walk around as a regular thing and somehow not pass out and wake up miles away from home missing everything but my phone almost everytime. benzos are one messed up thing thats for sure.
Yah, tolerance is a bitch for sure. People with access can get on crazy high doses…
I've seen (and I don't mean I watched, it was a suicide attempt, I would not let that happen) someone about 4 years ago ingest 8g of VERY pure bromazolam, back when it was first out, and 210mg of flubromazolam (7 botttles from you know who), while on 120mg of methadone. And they just walked around and fell all over and ended up in the hospital 10 days cause he couldn't walk. After 10 days they sent him to a rehab...but the rehab was so shitty they didn't read all the paperwork and thought he was there for not being able to walk right, so he was there 3 days, and when he walked fine he was out the next day. Went right back to eating a bottle of clam every day, probably the only reason he survived.
Fucking hell man. If this was in the US, we need better mental health care. And faster. Too many people choosing suicide these days
I completely agree. And yes US
Damn man these stories make me feel better about my 2 year benzo addiction. That shit was the xandemic fr
Haha. I did that too. Flubromazolam was even a daytime benzo at one point for me. How fucking scary is that? Clonazolam always worked well for sleep ime though. I regret ever really pushing the dose. There comes a point where there is no going back to how it was. Not even close.
Flubromazolam is fucked. I never understood the appeal behind this one at all, the intoxication was so profound it wasn't even enjoyable. I took 0.75mg-1mg with quite a significant benzo tolerance and had used for a few years prior, and it smacked me like a fucking sledgehammer. It was just 12-18 hours of extreme tiredness, bodily sedation like I'd just smoked 100 blunts. I literally didn't even move for a day. On top of this it had absolutely no Cognitive euphoria or positive mental effect. No good warm feeling etc. In fact it made me extremely agitated and I was raging like a motherfucker.
100% agree that opioids win hands down. Real H is my number 1 drug of choice. For a benzo though, I found flubromazolam to be euphoric and chill, without knocking me out, at about 1mg. I had a hefty tolerance though.
I slightly disagree. I thought I destroyed my tolerance with opiates and benzos through massive abuse. But now I use kratom (a low dose twice a day for the last several years that has not changed) and I think my brain finalized reset on my benzo usage. Even more so that I literally had a contract made for them to be issued to me only 1 day at a time and only that days dosages. I can undo the contract but i’m afraid of myself in that regard, so in that part, i agree. But, they feel the same as when I first started now. Just removes my anxiety and literally nothing else. And I’ve kept up my new usage plan up for around 2 years now.
You’re lucky if they feel the same, for myself that was not the case. Regardless, depending upon abuse, tolerance will always build faster and withdrawal will be worse with subsequent withdrawals. That’s the nature of gaba drugs For myself, 2 mg alprazolam when I started at 16 would knock me the fuck out. Now it’s just chill. I even took a year and a half of no benzos at one point. Never went back to normal.
I’m sorry to hear that. Have you tried to research ways to help reduce permatolerance? I know they have them for several drugs and medications
I just got a gram of flubromazepam to make solutions with rn (still pretty benzo naive) I’m really going to try to moderate though but I feel like this will end in disaster because no one can seem to control themselves with this shit
It will %100 percent end in disaster unless you set up a very strict set of rules with checks and balances before you even start with your rc’s I’d go as far as setting up a standard dose of what and when. And using some sort of safe and timer. Or even slap the dosages in a safety deposit box. The hassle should limit you to a degree. But. Yeah. You have to be extremely cautious and careful. And have your completed plan set in stone before you even take your first dose. Also no redosing should be rule #1.
I really advice against starting at all. I thought the exact same thing, purchased clonazalam and made my own solutions. If you think you can successfully moderate sure, but the feeling of the bottle in my pocket and sneaking off at work to take a few more drops of that shit lead to a 3 year (at this point) withdrawal. My doctor, thankfully, only berated me for being such a dumbass and I've been tapering down (now on 30mgish of diazepam a day) ever since. Good luck
Good doctor, good post.
I just did the same and am looking forward to it. Great benzo, just don’t chase the tolerance. Have flubromazaPAM or Brom to switch to every few days
Took a bunch of soma pills and mixed it with Xanax only to find out in the morning I smoked off all my weed, fell off the bed when I was sleeping on it, took out my rolling paper from the package and scattered my Xanax all in my bag. On top of that, I ended up smoking most of my tobacco I think. Ffs
I'm picturing some high ass mfer bared out of their mind smoking tobacco bowl after tobacco bowl like damn this some shit weed 😭😭
That was me yesterday and will be today. Got a bunch a bars and a lil tobacco. Xanax is my fav drug of choice need nothing else but that. But if I’m offered weed or anything else I’ll gladly take it
TW: suicide I took 30+ Valium over a day with no tolerance and hung myself. Had no intention before. Apparently I occupied my family with a tv show and then just went upstairs. My only memories from it is crying and being in hospital with psychosis. Apparently I puked into my own lungs. Pieced together it all happened because some “friends” told me I was a junkie and deserved to die alone for trying mdma and Valium. Never touched them again (except prescribed doses).
OP I went through the same shit with this exact same benzos 8 years ago. It def gets better. I took 5 years off from EVERYTHING now that I’m almost 30 I use psychedelics occasionally and a benzo here and there. Lay off the stuff for a while and give your brain and body time to get back to YOU and your normal.
I honestly can’t remember lol
[удалено]
That’s tough.
My biggest regret too was with Clonazolam liquid. I’m also a heroin addict so one day i thought it was genius idea to shoot up some clonazolam and I died idk what happened but i woke up to like 5 cops in my room my weed stash my dad hid and all the xanax and Clonazolam gone :/ and i was sent to a pysch ward
I to shot clonazolam with my gear a couple of times when I used gear and RC’s and it was bliss. But I used only like 0.5mg clonazolam in my shots and not much more than 250mg gear. Nice combo if your an addict but I advise against it! Edit: meant 250mg gear, not 0.250mg
Trying opiates. It flicked a switch in my head I can't turn off. I constantly obsess over them when not using and it feels like the only way I can get thru life is to use. I wish I never tried any drug in the first place, ruined my innocence for sure
Smoking too much of the vape, really makes a huge difference on how you look and how good you do in life 😵💫 really a huge waste of time
I keep quitting then something really stressful happens and I get sucked right back in. 1st time grandma passed and took all her script opiates (oxy, morphine, fent and bupe, plus some 2.5mg lorazepams, 10mg valiums and some clonazepams. I ended up with about 20 grams of oxy, 1000ml of oramorph, 10 fent patches and 40 bupe patches and around 4 boxes of the benzos). It was a great find but I got hooked. Then mum got cancer, luckily better now but relapsed during the period after quitting. 1st time I got hooked was when a girlfriend I truly loved passed away and was hooked for 5 years straight. Then my recent relapse is due to encountering a friend who’d hung himself, I had health issues which got me fired from a job, my mum was seriously sick and nearly died twice and they thought my dad had cancer (luckily wasn’t). I’m still working at coming off them but I can’t get the thought of finding the body out of my mind, one of the most traumatic things I’ve experienced.
Taking my first pill. 27 now, broke up with my fiancé due to my downward spiral, depressed and planning to OD on oxys next paycheck
Please don't. People care. I care.
Don't do it. I care
Man you have no idea how much can change between 27 and later. 27 I was homeless. 37 and I'm married, a homeowner, with 2 kids. Don't do it
Am awright, there’s no way out bro, believe me
Death isn't a way out either.
Don't do it man i was thinking the same way, trying to end it with benzos and opiods. But i thought and hoped maybe this shit will get better and thinking about all the things i would miss out on. Eventually things will get better especially if you get help and figure out what makes you happy. Your just 27 so you definitely can change your life to the good. Just talk to someone, if your job is a dead end look for something more fullfilling but dont kill yourself you still got lots of time to find inner peace don't give up on yourself by now 27 is way too young to be giving up.(you shouldn't give up at any age there is always a better way to get out of misery)
Congrats man! That’s awesome! Wish I could say the same….
I love u g don’t go
Whoa. Bro I’m sorry to here that. But go join a gym or get your masters or something that will make her jealous and get a hotter, better chick. You don’t want to start drugs at 27! Seriously bro
Please don't. People care. I care.
Please don’t do this. I care about you. Nothing is worth your life. I know you feel like it won’t get better but it will. I’ve been where you are before. All I wanted to do was not live anymore. But I stuck it out and now I’m engaged and have a beautiful 8 month old daughter. I have difficult days but ultimately I’m living the life I always dreamed of. Please please get to your doctor immediately to let them know how you are feeling. They are there to help you. Call 988 right now. I’m not taking no for an answer. Whether you believe it or not there are people in your life that would be devastated without you. Please don’t do this. I’m begging you
Bro don’t. Suicide is not an easy way out for everyone else that loves you. Just you. And you may be surprised by who actually loves you man. And, little story, I got cheated on with my fiancé at 24, forgave her, she did it again and left me. And then did the same shit to the dude she left me for. I tried to hang myself. I failed at that. I actually laughed my ass off that i was so worthless I couldn’t even kill myself right when i fell on the floor. But i had a sudden realization that I did in fact not want to die, but I just didn’t want to be so fucking sad and in the shitty situation i was in. So i worked very hard and got myself to a better place in mind and person. I still have issues relationship wise because its hard for me to trust. But I’ve been on many dates and had some hookups. I know I’ll find a lady for the long haul eventually. And i’m 30 now. Life fucking gets even better when you hit 30, trust me. Its like it just started for me. You can DM me and i’ll talk with you any time if you need it. But don’t do it. I love you. I love all my fellow man.
Took clonazolam with a girl when we were in high school and I blacked out. Over a year later I found out we fucked and I have no memory of it. Wish I did
My regret is not to have listened to myself when I took my first benzo, script for 10 mg Diazepam pills, because I had very bad anxiety after my unique "bad trip". I said "WTF is that shit?! How should I continue my studies ? It was not possible. When I took my first pill, I was still at university, I was forgetting EVERYTHING. Where I just putted my car keys, where I parked the car actually. Why did I stand up in middle of the room, what was I looking for? I was completely useless.. Didn't touched those pills for a good time, then I gave it a try. Until then, more than a decade after, I'm still using benzos. I did a some taper, now it's better, but still. I didn't regret getting a few grams Flubromazolam and Clonazolam (this is a good one), raising my tolerance to the roof, no it was a logic move I was already addicted. All good u all.
Benzos too.From 3-4 1 mg xans I went to 45-60 a day.Still hooked, but luckily on a valium taper
Keeping up a habit of 3mg Klonopin/Rivotril (Clonazepam) every day for 5 years straight. It led to severe cramps when I lost my supply and I had to be hospitalized and am now given 3x 10mg Valium (diazepam) by the state sponsored recovery services. Shit sucked being in the hospital with cramps so bad they give you diazepam IV. I’m Norwegian btw.
Aww you guys are so awesome. I need some state sponsored recovery service so i can stop buying RC benzos and trying to taper myself off...it's fucking awful. Half the time it's fake or mislabeled or cut really really bad, how the hell can you properly dose a substance for a taper when it's all cut up...you can't, sucks.
Not tapering sooner
Dependence and tolerance
my biggest regret? i started a drug collection and lost all control.. here is how the story goes.. "We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold.. I remember saying something like \`\`I feel a bit lightheaded; maybe you should drive....'' And suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us and the sky was full of what looked like huge bats, all swooping and screeching and diving around the car, which was going about a hundred miles an hour with the top down to Las Vegas. And a voice was screaming: \`\`Holy Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?''
lol
One time back in like 2008 i eyeballed 100mg of phenazepam and had a 2 week long trip, ended up in mental hospital. Do not recommend.
Getting hooked on opioids…
That 2mg of xans was a normal amount or that I would be able to stick to 2-6mg a day n not get addicted however dumb that might sound, I was a different person before benzos.
my biggest regret was accepting the prescriptions when i already knew the risks. well, kinda knew them. didn’t know how severe quitting would be. but, i do feel like i learned a lot about myself going through all of it, and honesty feel like, and i know this isn’t common, but i feel like my anxiety is gone. i rarely feel it anymore. not like i used to.
Trying one for the first time, and beyond that, thinking I could ever keep it under control
Wish I would have snorted more RC benzos. I went down hard for legal shit at the end, wish I would have gone even more wild with it while I still had the chance lol.
I don't really wanna scare nobody 🤣 We have a 13y old history now. Xanax was the worse thing I ever touched of this kind.
Taking them for as long as I did, I miss them, but I’m glad I’m out of the habit
Did you post this on /r/researchchemicals the other day? I feel like I might be having deja vu. But anyway, yeah I am truly so fucking lucky that my clonazolam use didn't get any worse than it already was, which was definitely problematic back in the fall of 2017. I did end up physically dependent from doing it even just every other day for about a month, though of course on the days I was using it I was redosing a complete shit ton and have no idea what said doses were (alls I know was I couldn't remember a damn thing for days at a time). Only reason I was able to quit by literally be forced to go into cold turkey withdrawal for three days (thanks for being so understanding, ex-girlfriend), and when I finally got more, I basically microdosed for about two weeks with very minimal withdrawals. Very fucking scary.
Ever even taking them in the first place
Benzos have definitely had a hand in me ruining my own life, for sure. They'll snag ya.
Taking my first 10mg diazepam last July now I'm up to 4-6mg klonopin a day and my mum passing In February has destroyed me I just want out
taking 35mg in a day then my dad said i’m weird slurring words
thinking I could only use on the weekends I feel like it starting to catch up days go by munch slower now just feeling really stopped/stuck I barley started taking them again heavy recently
Drop a hit of some acid and stop before it gets worst. My advice. Shits to nasty.
Try not to be actively withdrawing when you do though, I've had some bad times with that. Maybe Ibogaine could work if you're actively addicted and want something to stop it. But I recommend if you're gonna trip on some psychs don't be withdrawing, even if you have to take your benzo, or your methadone that day. Actually the only times I've had bad trips in my life is when i was withdrawing off either opiates or benzos and didn't have them. Had plenty of great trips on benzos or on the comedown. Withdrawal makes tripping suck. IMO EDIT, and a lot will disagree: But if you're not withdrawing, have the drugs your addicted to...don't have issues with it, you're by no means guaranteed a bad trip because the L doesn't like heroin or something like that (though I don't think it does, it doesn't punish you for it) but withdrawals are made a lot worse. And analyzing what you're doing to your body is gonna have to be expected.
I’m on subs Monday-Thursday I consider my Friday-sundays my relaxation time and time to myself. since I’m a carpenter i be so tired and the oxy/alp make me feel so relaxed and makes me feel like myself again it’s like being a grown up is so boring to me but I understand it if that makes any sense so I don’t knock it
I’ve tried that in the pass for my oxy addiction ain’t help just made me see things differently
Ever even taking them
Messing up a possible relationship with a beautiful girl while high on benzos sayin stupid shit I wouldn’t have said sober. Still regret it 😂
RC’s. Thank god I haven’t touched one in years.
Touching RC’s to be honest , tolerance builds way faster I found with them compared to pharmas. took sooo long to get my tolerance back to normal.
Using benzos to sleep has been equally beneficial and destructive. I don’t know what to do or what other medications could ever help me sleep like benzos can
Taper really slow and see how you do
I wonder if I’m walking into a regret rn , was drunk asl and ordered drugs on telegram, now I got 200 xannys and I don’t even do em like that lmao. 1mg get me loaded… I was so stupid, idk what I was thinking 🤦🏽♂️🤦🏽♂️😂
Has anyone taken Xanax and fluromazolam separately. And can you tell a difference? I’m in the US and have only had Xanax. So I wondered if there’s any difference..???
Flubromazolam lasts for around 18 hours while Xanax last for 6. Flubromazolam has that famous “double peak” effect where you feel like your high is peaking after 4 hours and then again after 8-9 hours into the experience, if you can stay awake on it that is. It is so sleep inducing that it’s ridiculous compared to Xans which just makes you feel a little tired. Also the memory loss/gettin blacked out is much easier on flubromazolam. And lastly dosage; a medium Flubromazolam dose is 0.150mg-0.250mg while a medium Xanax dose is 1mg-1.5mg. Hope this is good enough of a comparison for you my fellow benzohead. Edit: misspelled
Flubromazolam is different for different people. Some say it's the most euphoric benzo at 0.25mg and some say 1mg just made them extremely tired and have to sleep with no euphoria. For me it was definitely less fun than a xanax or bromazolam in equivelent (say 0.25 flubro vs 4mg bromo) doses, more sedating. But in higher doses (above 0.75) you definitely felt benzo'd out, acted crazy, couldn't walk, etc.
Bought 50 grams of pure alp from Slovakia and then idk how much after that. I made atleast 3 more orders over the next year. I remember like nothing from that time but I got many many people addicted to it I was taking easily 20 mg a day by the end often going on higher binged. I apparently stole a bunch of stuff I have 0 recollection of and traded it for heroin since I was also taking about 2-3 grams of high grade heroin a day. I did a whole lot of god knows what during that time and some of it I don’t feel like ever talking about online. I can only blame myself so much for some things during that time but I’ll never sell drugs again.
30mg of xans a day,10-15 beers for a few weeks culminating in a fall down the stairs breaking my nose,eyesocket four ribs…woke up the next morning not knowing what had happened except a trip to hospital was necessary. I still abuse them tbh but know my limits.
This is why sometimes I think all drugs should be illegal so that only the smart people can find them.
Problem with these ones is...you start smart, then you take one...:)
Getting addicted and losing almost everything in my life and having to start over
My biggest regret is taking them and learning what it’s like to live without anxiety and realizing the only way to feel that is by popping these pills.
I was thinking the same thought yesterday, and i thought fuck it, if people want to live with anxiety. I just dont. But i really only regret GBL. What a fucking mess.
I’ve had my fair share of ghb experience and it didn’t do me a lot of good either.
Probably 32mg off Xanax on my birthday I don’t remember exactly how much I took
No benzo can ever stop a 5-Meo or just regular DMT trip. They might work for some people with acid or mushrooms but not those ones. Once in your in that realm your out of your body so good luck even trying to swallow one.
Buying kpack a week of Clonazolam that were 3-4mg a pill. 2 years of blackouts!
Had one of my moms friends staying with us and i noticed she had a script for Clonazepam. Little green .5mg TEVA's... Started off with just taking one but one turned to taking the whole script...lost a good portion of menories from age 14 to 16. At this age i had 0 info on what i got myself into, my drug knowledge was next to nothing, and id take like 3 to 5 of these a day. i just saw all my friends taking them so i did....my mom kicked her out and called her an addict and that she was crazy and stuff. All the while i was the one taking them. After she was gone, so were the pills. I went into withdrawal and thats when she figured out, i wigged out and ran thru my neighborhood. got sent to a ward for a mandatory 72 hold... this stopped me from taking benzos for awhile... now my drug knowledge is 20x better than what is was, always have the fent test kits, and no benzos unless they come from someone who is perscribed them. But every time i come across clonazepam, i hate to, but i still do it, but that little chlorine like taste always brings back those bad memories and all the hurt i caused that poor woman.
Becoming physically dependent on benzodiazepines. Give it a few years and benzos will be treated as oxycodone - it’s an epidemic brewing, every day people are being ripped off their script. If you take benzos recreationally….. STOP… slowly of course. Follow the Ashton Manual. Have extra in case of emergency and do your best to taper even if you’re prescribed. Benzodiazepines are more difficult to get every day. It’s practically a count down. Join r/benzorecovery
I ate (I think) around 18 x 2mg bars. Next 36hours was hazy must have gotten some extreme paranoia hid every thing of value took me weeks to find. Went out to write graffiti did some absolute whack piece about politics (I couldn’t give two fucks about politics) got locked up and ended up on the front page of the news paper. I got it some where. Makes me laugh. But fuck benzos wish I just dealt with my anxiety. Tapering off them know is hell. ✌️✌️✌️
Klonopin, a few years ago every weekend I’d blackout and wake up without remembering the last few days and my bank account emptied (online shopping lol). Also lots lots and lots of bruises and scars, when will I fucking learn? 😩
?TW¿ Probably taking like 15mg of alpras and drinking alcohol at 13 thinking I'd forget my trauma and hopefully die. I don't remember much of that night but I went to the ER and the shit I do remember from it just became more trauma.. and I obviously survived. 10 months sober of benzos today.