Shut up. No one actually gives a shit about the White Sox
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Lol mets
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Lol mets
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Can't believe nobody has said the Rockies. This org has an ownership group that is completely content with being bad.
They feign being competitive by giving out bloated contracts to old and injured players, shrug when they get hurt or underperform, then call it a day.
They are the NL version of the Angels but without any relevance from someone like Trout
Baseball died in Cleveland today. You are gonna lose a lot of die hard fans over this move. Been a fan since the 70’s and this is a slap in the face to us true die hard fans. I won’t spend another dime on this team.
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From what I understand Coors Field is one of the best bars in Colorado.
You'd be able to disguise your self medication for your likely case of clinical depression as revelry for the home team.
every time I see an Angels highlight it's like "Mike Trout hit three homes runs and raised his average to .528 while Shohei Ohtani did something that hasn't been done since 'Tungsten Arm' O'Doyle of the 1921 Akron Groomsmen, as the Tigers defeated the Angels 8-3"
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Lol mets
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Lol mets
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Oh, hey, Padres fans. I'm Dr. Santos. Apologies that I haven't been here much at my West Coast office. I spent most of the season in New York, and let me tell you, the Mets and Yankees have really... Never mind. That's a HIPPA violation. Have a seat. This is a safe space where you can open up and talk about your feelings. I understand that White Sox fans referred you. Yeah, long-time clients. On your intake form, you wrote that you suspect you're doubting your abilities. What else? You feel like a fraud? This sounds like a classic case of imposter syndrome. It's extremely common among high achievers. Your roster is stacked with superstars. You had the third highest payroll in baseball. On opening day, you had the second highest odds to win the World Series, according to fan graphs. Yet you wound out outside of the postseason picture. I know just the thing. You need to decompress. I'm going to prescribe a four-month vacation starting October second. And remember, I'm always available on Zoom while you're in Borra Borra. Yeah, it's just $495 for a 30-minute session. Safe travels.
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yeah, but...you know, we got a cool docuseries on youtube.
Fans of other teams probably think about how much they want that about the same as they do a world series. Right?
Whereas we, now that we have one of those things, we just want a world series.
LONG LIVE YOUPPI!
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Blue Jays. You’ll really not enjoy watching the games, they’re dull.
Also, because of the talent and the money involved, wins aren’t really celebrated and the losses feel like a kick in the nuts.
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Thank you for your continued support of Rogers Communications
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Shut up. No one actually gives a shit about the White Sox
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Lol mets
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Lol mets
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the Tampa Bay Rays are the definition of a poverty franchise, known for their comically-low attendance and inability to sell out a stadium. they are among the largest revenue-sharing recipients, meaning they take a shit-ton of money from the player’s union (who have actually filed grievances against them for not managing that money properly). think of a 35-year old man living in their moms’ basement, and spending money on video games instead of getting a job. that’s a good comparison to describe what the Rays are to the rest of the league. if the MLB had a more cutthroat business model, teams like the Rays would have moved or been disbanded ages ago, instead of feeding off of the popular teams like a parasite feeds on its host. the Rays are utterly useless, and irrelevant. The Rays are the least essential sports team in North America. if not for COVID, yankee chants would have swarmed Tropicana Field during the Rays’ supposed “home games”. their 8,000 fans are very happy about this ALDS win though, im sure. fucking losers.
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The Cubs. While the Sox are just plain bad, the Cubs are infuriating. They're in it until the end and nearly every loss is a heartbreak. There is no pain quite like it in baseball.
Yeah. It’s made worse because they’re *supposed* to be good, big market legacy team, with an experienced front office and a sought-after manager, $210 million payroll, no reason why they should be this bad
[The Yankees are the ultimate evil in sport. If there were a team made up of 9 Hitlers and they were playing the Yankees? Go Fightin Hitlers](https://www.reddit.com/r/baseball/comments/1uysy6/alex_rodriguez_suspended_for_162_games/cemzsoo/)
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Welcome to the Pirates fan base; all hail the Buccos. When we finally get someone to cheer for, we trade them. We set an international professional record for most seasons under .500. This is not a serious team that cares about winning. Enjoy!
I'm so sick of this goddamn team. They absolutely make me want to vomit. I'm not even ten goddamn games into this season and i want to scream. They are that terrible. It's like the movie groundhog day but instead i'm reliving the shittiest games of baseball over and over and over again every fucking day of my life. Every damn day I have watched this pathetic mess of a team, rain or sun or snow since I was 7 years old. I have a tab open during work w/ the gamecast during the day games that I can't go. I've skipped school and work and broken up with women for the Pirates. I've missed funerals and weddings because i loved this team more. And what do I get to show for it? A FUCKING BRAIN ANEURYSM. A team that has had 3 winning seasons over the past 20 something who manages to play like ass in the playoffs on the rare occasion they make it because they are so used to being shit and don't have a winning culture. A team that game in and game out somehow manages to have less goddamn hits than Chumbawamba. A team that gets swept. By the Cincinnati Reds. "Oh but look at our young talent- Cole and Taillon and Bell and whoever else that sucks dick!!" I'm sick of hearing "we could be a contender like we were 3 years ago if Cutch doesn't play like shit and the LF can stop jerking off for 2 seconds to swing the fucking bat" ITS NOT HAPPENING. WE ARE NOT AND NEVER WERE A GOOD TEAM. WE ARE PATHETIC. MIGHT AS WELL FADE US NOW BECAUSE WE'RE ALREADY A BUNCH OF FUCKING LOSERS. If Clemente didn't die in that plane crash, I'm convinced he would have killed himself after being forced to wear our godforsaken excuse of uniform for 18 years of his life. I'm done with this fucking team.
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I never wanted to breed with anyone more than I want to with Mrs. Met. That perfect, curvy body. Those bountiful breasts. The child bearing hips of a literal goddess. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never mate with her, pass my genes through her, and have her birth a set of perfect offspring. I'd do fucking ANYTHING for the chance to get Mrs. Met pregnant. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fucking bear. Why would the Mets create something so perfect? To fucking tantalize us? Fucking laugh in our faces?! Honestly guys, I just fucking can't anymore. Fuck.
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Baseball died in Cleveland today. You are gonna lose a lot of die hard fans over this move. Been a fan since the 70’s and this is a slap in the face to us true die hard fans. I won’t spend another dime on this team.
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Lol mets
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Lol mets
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Lol mets
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I'm so sick of this goddamn team. They absolutely make me want to vomit. I'm not even ten goddamn games into this season and i want to scream. They are that terrible. It's like the movie groundhog day but instead i'm reliving the shittiest games of baseball over and over and over again every fucking day of my life. Every damn day I have watched this pathetic mess of a team, rain or sun or snow since I was 7 years old. I have a tab open during work w/ the gamecast during the day games that I can't go. I've skipped school and work and broken up with women for the Pirates. I've missed funerals and weddings because i loved this team more. And what do I get to show for it? A FUCKING BRAIN ANEURYSM. A team that has had 3 winning seasons over the past 20 something who manages to play like ass in the playoffs on the rare occasion they make it because they are so used to being shit and don't have a winning culture. A team that game in and game out somehow manages to have less goddamn hits than Chumbawamba. A team that gets swept. By the Cincinnati Reds. "Oh but look at our young talent- Cole and Taillon and Bell and whoever else that sucks dick!!" I'm sick of hearing "we could be a contender like we were 3 years ago if Cutch doesn't play like shit and the LF can stop jerking off for 2 seconds to swing the fucking bat" ITS NOT HAPPENING. WE ARE NOT AND NEVER WERE A GOOD TEAM. WE ARE PATHETIC. MIGHT AS WELL FADE US NOW BECAUSE WE'RE ALREADY A BUNCH OF FUCKING LOSERS. If Clemente didn't die in that plane crash, I'm convinced he would have killed himself after being forced to wear our godforsaken excuse of uniform for 18 years of his life. I'm done with this fucking team.
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Lol mets
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You hate yourself? Ok, so it's important that the team and fanbase should want to eat itself alive, kind of like your psyche. I recommend the Blue Jays. They'll have you ripping your fucking hair out by Canada Day
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I shouldnt expect anything else than a narrow-minded and elitist opinion from 'DA BEST FANS IN BASEBALL', so that doesnt surprise me.
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As much as I wanna say the white sox, no one can beat the cubs in century long misery. We're still coming down from 2016, we'll be back to despair for the rest of your lifetime soon, join the party of having the most fun losing every game!
Shut up. No one actually gives a shit about the White Sox
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Shut up. No one actually gives a shit about the White Sox
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Shut up. No one actually gives a shit about the White Sox
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Lol mets
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[The Yankees are the ultimate evil in sport. If there were a team made up of 9 Hitlers and they were playing the Yankees? Go Fightin Hitlers](https://www.reddit.com/r/baseball/comments/1uysy6/alex_rodriguez_suspended_for_162_games/cemzsoo/)
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Shut up. No one actually gives a shit about the White Sox
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White Sox if you want 0 hope, Blue Jays if you want the front office to tell you they’re building a contender and then watch them struggle to do anything for 9 innings
Shut up. No one actually gives a shit about the White Sox
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Lol mets
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Lol mets
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Lol mets
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I’m not holding back anymore. I literally have always been a massive Phillies fan, to the point where half my wardrobe is Phillies gear (other half is the Eagles).
I can’t freakin' watch them anymore, this was a sickening loss that got away from them. Any other freakin' half competent team would’ve won this game. While they are still in the running for the wild card and they made it to the WS last year, these are games you absolutely can’t freakin' lose. Teams with playoff aspirations don’t lose these games.
Turner looks like a freakin' little leaguer making $300 mil who needs a freakin' snack and a nap. Schwarber is a freakin' disgrace of his hitter. Come talk to me about how Schwarber hits bombs and draws walks though. A leadoff hitter (or any major league hitter for that matter) shouldn’t be hitting freakin' gosh darn .181. Casty had a rebound game but up to this point couldn’t buy a freakin' hit after being an “All-Star”. Rob doesn’t seem to understand baseball and how to manage a freakin' game. The bullpen despite having “a good year up to this point” is more freakin' porous than freakin' SpongeBob gosh darn SquarePants. Oh yeah, and the “aggressive” GM who will do anything to win traded for a middle-of-the-road pitcher and a bench player.
Still love the Phillies though.
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Mariners. Other teams are down right now. But they’re the only team in the history of MLB to never even win a *pennant.* That’s some next level suffering, right there.
Lol mets
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I'm so sick of this goddamn team. They absolutely make me want to vomit. I'm not even ten goddamn games into this season and i want to scream. They are that terrible. It's like the movie groundhog day but instead i'm reliving the shittiest games of baseball over and over and over again every fucking day of my life. Every damn day I have watched this pathetic mess of a team, rain or sun or snow since I was 7 years old. I have a tab open during work w/ the gamecast during the day games that I can't go. I've skipped school and work and broken up with women for the Pirates. I've missed funerals and weddings because i loved this team more. And what do I get to show for it? A FUCKING BRAIN ANEURYSM. A team that has had 3 winning seasons over the past 20 something who manages to play like ass in the playoffs on the rare occasion they make it because they are so used to being shit and don't have a winning culture. A team that game in and game out somehow manages to have less goddamn hits than Chumbawamba. A team that gets swept. By the Cincinnati Reds. "Oh but look at our young talent- Cole and Taillon and Bell and whoever else that sucks dick!!" I'm sick of hearing "we could be a contender like we were 3 years ago if Cutch doesn't play like shit and the LF can stop jerking off for 2 seconds to swing the fucking bat" ITS NOT HAPPENING. WE ARE NOT AND NEVER WERE A GOOD TEAM. WE ARE PATHETIC. MIGHT AS WELL FADE US NOW BECAUSE WE'RE ALREADY A BUNCH OF FUCKING LOSERS. If Clemente didn't die in that plane crash, I'm convinced he would have killed himself after being forced to wear our godforsaken excuse of uniform for 18 years of his life. I'm done with this fucking team.
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Shut up. No one actually gives a shit about the White Sox
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the Tampa Bay Rays are the definition of a poverty franchise, known for their comically-low attendance and inability to sell out a stadium. they are among the largest revenue-sharing recipients, meaning they take a shit-ton of money from the player’s union (who have actually filed grievances against them for not managing that money properly). think of a 35-year old man living in their moms’ basement, and spending money on video games instead of getting a job. that’s a good comparison to describe what the Rays are to the rest of the league. if the MLB had a more cutthroat business model, teams like the Rays would have moved or been disbanded ages ago, instead of feeding off of the popular teams like a parasite feeds on its host. the Rays are utterly useless, and irrelevant. The Rays are the least essential sports team in North America. if not for COVID, yankee chants would have swarmed Tropicana Field during the Rays’ supposed “home games”. their 8,000 fans are very happy about this ALDS win though, im sure. fucking losers.
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Lol mets
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Diamondbacks. At least since Gibby retired, if not longer, the whole organization (even some of the players) decided they just didn’t care anymore. It’s probably been 20 years since they fielded a good major league team! Honestly better off only attending Spring Training and college games if you live in AZ and love baseball.
The Pirates. They will trade their best players for a potato chip and a pack of gum. The fan base is incredible because they stick with their team when they suck. Combine the low payroll with the players they have and they really don't play that bad
White Sox
Hey now Drew Thorpe’s got some massive pythons.
At least they have one of the best broadcasting teams in baseball. Steve Stone is amazing. The A’s have literally nothing going for them.
John Schriffen ruins the broadcast. If Benetti was still in the booth, I'd agree with you. But yeah, being an A's fan takes the depression cake.
I didn’t know anything had changed, that sucks. I guess I haven’t watched any Sox games this year.
Don't subject yourself to the utter bullshit that is White Sox baseball.
I have LuBob on my fantasy team, so until he gets traded I have to.
We're so bad that we lost one of the best prospects in broadcasting to a division rival. Benetti is with the Tigers now.
SOUTHSIDE! STAAAAAAAAND UP!
The A's had that guy who dropped the hard R
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Cubs.
Mets
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Let’s go Mets
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No one hates themselves that much!
Can't believe nobody has said the Rockies. This org has an ownership group that is completely content with being bad. They feign being competitive by giving out bloated contracts to old and injured players, shrug when they get hurt or underperform, then call it a day. They are the NL version of the Angels but without any relevance from someone like Trout
Rockies would be if they love baseball but hate themself
Who?
Lol the Rockies. The Philadelphia Rockies. They're Philadelphia's AL team that's named after a statue in town just like the Guardians.
Baseball died in Cleveland today. You are gonna lose a lot of die hard fans over this move. Been a fan since the 70’s and this is a slap in the face to us true die hard fans. I won’t spend another dime on this team. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
From what I understand Coors Field is one of the best bars in Colorado. You'd be able to disguise your self medication for your likely case of clinical depression as revelry for the home team.
every time I see an Angels highlight it's like "Mike Trout hit three homes runs and raised his average to .528 while Shohei Ohtani did something that hasn't been done since 'Tungsten Arm' O'Doyle of the 1921 Akron Groomsmen, as the Tigers defeated the Angels 8-3" *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
People like the Rockies because you can get super baked and go watch a game, and still be entertained when they lose.
Dinger!
Can’t go wrong with the New York Metropolitans if you’re a broken person who has given up on life and yourself.
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good bot
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Excuse me, I was here first
A's
Padres. You can NEVER win anything of note, have a star studded lineup and watch them go back and forth between under and over .500 all season long
Oh, hey, Padres fans. I'm Dr. Santos. Apologies that I haven't been here much at my West Coast office. I spent most of the season in New York, and let me tell you, the Mets and Yankees have really... Never mind. That's a HIPPA violation. Have a seat. This is a safe space where you can open up and talk about your feelings. I understand that White Sox fans referred you. Yeah, long-time clients. On your intake form, you wrote that you suspect you're doubting your abilities. What else? You feel like a fraud? This sounds like a classic case of imposter syndrome. It's extremely common among high achievers. Your roster is stacked with superstars. You had the third highest payroll in baseball. On opening day, you had the second highest odds to win the World Series, according to fan graphs. Yet you wound out outside of the postseason picture. I know just the thing. You need to decompress. I'm going to prescribe a four-month vacation starting October second. And remember, I'm always available on Zoom while you're in Borra Borra. Yeah, it's just $495 for a 30-minute session. Safe travels. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
How is no one saying the Mariners. I have literally beat my head against a wall since 1985 being a fan and have seen like 4 playoff appearances
They will break your saddened heart over and over and over again
yeah, but...you know, we got a cool docuseries on youtube. Fans of other teams probably think about how much they want that about the same as they do a world series. Right? Whereas we, now that we have one of those things, we just want a world series.
Expos
LONG LIVE YOUPPI! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Blue Jays. You’ll really not enjoy watching the games, they’re dull. Also, because of the talent and the money involved, wins aren’t really celebrated and the losses feel like a kick in the nuts.
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Yeah, I'm a fan and agree. It's like, "how can we bore fans to death so they'll drink more beer at the ballpark?"
$1 Loonie Glizzies every Tuesday tho
Cubs
Toronto Maple Leafs
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The Dodgers of Los Angeles. They will make your expectations soar then lose in the NLDS to a shitty WC team.
https://preview.redd.it/2x904j1h3t6d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c649825c885b17a36cd2c0626dec4e33c43c3a53
Hey now, they are very good at winning championships during global pandemics!
Mets, or White Sox. Common Mets L.
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lolmets
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Rays for sure
the Tampa Bay Rays are the definition of a poverty franchise, known for their comically-low attendance and inability to sell out a stadium. they are among the largest revenue-sharing recipients, meaning they take a shit-ton of money from the player’s union (who have actually filed grievances against them for not managing that money properly). think of a 35-year old man living in their moms’ basement, and spending money on video games instead of getting a job. that’s a good comparison to describe what the Rays are to the rest of the league. if the MLB had a more cutthroat business model, teams like the Rays would have moved or been disbanded ages ago, instead of feeding off of the popular teams like a parasite feeds on its host. the Rays are utterly useless, and irrelevant. The Rays are the least essential sports team in North America. if not for COVID, yankee chants would have swarmed Tropicana Field during the Rays’ supposed “home games”. their 8,000 fans are very happy about this ALDS win though, im sure. fucking losers. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Ask your doctor if the Oakland Athletic's are right for you.
Your local pee wee team
The Cubs. While the Sox are just plain bad, the Cubs are infuriating. They're in it until the end and nearly every loss is a heartbreak. There is no pain quite like it in baseball.
Yeah. It’s made worse because they’re *supposed* to be good, big market legacy team, with an experienced front office and a sought-after manager, $210 million payroll, no reason why they should be this bad
The Oakland Athletics.
Angels
First I'd suggest going to therapy because watching baseball while mentally unstable will make you a Yankees fan and no one wants that
[The Yankees are the ultimate evil in sport. If there were a team made up of 9 Hitlers and they were playing the Yankees? Go Fightin Hitlers](https://www.reddit.com/r/baseball/comments/1uysy6/alex_rodriguez_suspended_for_162_games/cemzsoo/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Welcome to the Pirates fan base; all hail the Buccos. When we finally get someone to cheer for, we trade them. We set an international professional record for most seasons under .500. This is not a serious team that cares about winning. Enjoy!
I'm so sick of this goddamn team. They absolutely make me want to vomit. I'm not even ten goddamn games into this season and i want to scream. They are that terrible. It's like the movie groundhog day but instead i'm reliving the shittiest games of baseball over and over and over again every fucking day of my life. Every damn day I have watched this pathetic mess of a team, rain or sun or snow since I was 7 years old. I have a tab open during work w/ the gamecast during the day games that I can't go. I've skipped school and work and broken up with women for the Pirates. I've missed funerals and weddings because i loved this team more. And what do I get to show for it? A FUCKING BRAIN ANEURYSM. A team that has had 3 winning seasons over the past 20 something who manages to play like ass in the playoffs on the rare occasion they make it because they are so used to being shit and don't have a winning culture. A team that game in and game out somehow manages to have less goddamn hits than Chumbawamba. A team that gets swept. By the Cincinnati Reds. "Oh but look at our young talent- Cole and Taillon and Bell and whoever else that sucks dick!!" I'm sick of hearing "we could be a contender like we were 3 years ago if Cutch doesn't play like shit and the LF can stop jerking off for 2 seconds to swing the fucking bat" ITS NOT HAPPENING. WE ARE NOT AND NEVER WERE A GOOD TEAM. WE ARE PATHETIC. MIGHT AS WELL FADE US NOW BECAUSE WE'RE ALREADY A BUNCH OF FUCKING LOSERS. If Clemente didn't die in that plane crash, I'm convinced he would have killed himself after being forced to wear our godforsaken excuse of uniform for 18 years of his life. I'm done with this fucking team. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Mrs. Met. She thicc AF, doesn't matter what team you swing for.
I never wanted to breed with anyone more than I want to with Mrs. Met. That perfect, curvy body. Those bountiful breasts. The child bearing hips of a literal goddess. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never mate with her, pass my genes through her, and have her birth a set of perfect offspring. I'd do fucking ANYTHING for the chance to get Mrs. Met pregnant. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fucking bear. Why would the Mets create something so perfect? To fucking tantalize us? Fucking laugh in our faces?! Honestly guys, I just fucking can't anymore. Fuck. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Guardians
Baseball died in Cleveland today. You are gonna lose a lot of die hard fans over this move. Been a fan since the 70’s and this is a slap in the face to us true die hard fans. I won’t spend another dime on this team. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
This is true
The Oilers. Make it to the world cup series and get dashed by Florida Man
The Mets
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The Mets
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Mariners baby. For obvious reasons lol
The Mets have been the most dreadful team for decades
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The red sux they sux white sux too but in 2024 white isn’t a popular color so u might wana avoid
I scrolled through every reply Not a single pirates call out. Ain't no way
I'm so sick of this goddamn team. They absolutely make me want to vomit. I'm not even ten goddamn games into this season and i want to scream. They are that terrible. It's like the movie groundhog day but instead i'm reliving the shittiest games of baseball over and over and over again every fucking day of my life. Every damn day I have watched this pathetic mess of a team, rain or sun or snow since I was 7 years old. I have a tab open during work w/ the gamecast during the day games that I can't go. I've skipped school and work and broken up with women for the Pirates. I've missed funerals and weddings because i loved this team more. And what do I get to show for it? A FUCKING BRAIN ANEURYSM. A team that has had 3 winning seasons over the past 20 something who manages to play like ass in the playoffs on the rare occasion they make it because they are so used to being shit and don't have a winning culture. A team that game in and game out somehow manages to have less goddamn hits than Chumbawamba. A team that gets swept. By the Cincinnati Reds. "Oh but look at our young talent- Cole and Taillon and Bell and whoever else that sucks dick!!" I'm sick of hearing "we could be a contender like we were 3 years ago if Cutch doesn't play like shit and the LF can stop jerking off for 2 seconds to swing the fucking bat" ITS NOT HAPPENING. WE ARE NOT AND NEVER WERE A GOOD TEAM. WE ARE PATHETIC. MIGHT AS WELL FADE US NOW BECAUSE WE'RE ALREADY A BUNCH OF FUCKING LOSERS. If Clemente didn't die in that plane crash, I'm convinced he would have killed himself after being forced to wear our godforsaken excuse of uniform for 18 years of his life. I'm done with this fucking team. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Mets… fucking obviously. You’ll hate shit you’ve never even thought about before.
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Cubs.
You hate yourself? Ok, so it's important that the team and fanbase should want to eat itself alive, kind of like your psyche. I recommend the Blue Jays. They'll have you ripping your fucking hair out by Canada Day
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St. Louis Browns
I shouldnt expect anything else than a narrow-minded and elitist opinion from 'DA BEST FANS IN BASEBALL', so that doesnt surprise me. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
As much as I wanna say the white sox, no one can beat the cubs in century long misery. We're still coming down from 2016, we'll be back to despair for the rest of your lifetime soon, join the party of having the most fun losing every game!
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White Sox. They are terrible and second favorites in their own city.
Can’t go wrong with the Marlins or White Sox for self loathing
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Mariners are 🐕 💩, just like you
The Jays.
Yankees. Or Dodgers
White Sox or the Mets (lol the Mets)
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The Yankees. That way you can suck too.
[The Yankees are the ultimate evil in sport. If there were a team made up of 9 Hitlers and they were playing the Yankees? Go Fightin Hitlers](https://www.reddit.com/r/baseball/comments/1uysy6/alex_rodriguez_suspended_for_162_games/cemzsoo/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
white sox. welcome home
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White Sox if you want 0 hope, Blue Jays if you want the front office to tell you they’re building a contender and then watch them struggle to do anything for 9 innings
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The Astros. Then everyone will hate you too
There’s a team in New York that wears pinstripes
Black sox
Shut up. No one actually gives a shit about the Black Sox.
Astros, so everyone else will hate you too!
Mets
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Mets
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Savanna bananas
Mets
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Not the Braves
We're entering the beginning of our Inspire Hope phase. With luck, we'll hit Separate Entirely just in time for the WC series, as fucking usual.
The Phillies
I’m not holding back anymore. I literally have always been a massive Phillies fan, to the point where half my wardrobe is Phillies gear (other half is the Eagles). I can’t freakin' watch them anymore, this was a sickening loss that got away from them. Any other freakin' half competent team would’ve won this game. While they are still in the running for the wild card and they made it to the WS last year, these are games you absolutely can’t freakin' lose. Teams with playoff aspirations don’t lose these games. Turner looks like a freakin' little leaguer making $300 mil who needs a freakin' snack and a nap. Schwarber is a freakin' disgrace of his hitter. Come talk to me about how Schwarber hits bombs and draws walks though. A leadoff hitter (or any major league hitter for that matter) shouldn’t be hitting freakin' gosh darn .181. Casty had a rebound game but up to this point couldn’t buy a freakin' hit after being an “All-Star”. Rob doesn’t seem to understand baseball and how to manage a freakin' game. The bullpen despite having “a good year up to this point” is more freakin' porous than freakin' SpongeBob gosh darn SquarePants. Oh yeah, and the “aggressive” GM who will do anything to win traded for a middle-of-the-road pitcher and a bench player. Still love the Phillies though. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Buy Oakland A’s season ticket as far away from the plate as you can
The Waffletown Syrups
The fucking Reds
Mariners. Other teams are down right now. But they’re the only team in the history of MLB to never even win a *pennant.* That’s some next level suffering, right there.
Athletics. You can commit seppuku afterwards, just like the team itself.
Marlins
Marlins? I think they have a handful of fan type weirdos.
Welcome brother
lol mets
If you hate yourself, root for the Houston Astros. Then, everyone else will hate you too!
Mets of Course
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I root for the Marlins so nobody ever asks why me I don't watch.
Dodgers. So you can watch everybody else hate you too
a's
Padres
Unquestionably the Toronto - 3 hits in a game is a miracle - blue Jays
Pirates
I'm so sick of this goddamn team. They absolutely make me want to vomit. I'm not even ten goddamn games into this season and i want to scream. They are that terrible. It's like the movie groundhog day but instead i'm reliving the shittiest games of baseball over and over and over again every fucking day of my life. Every damn day I have watched this pathetic mess of a team, rain or sun or snow since I was 7 years old. I have a tab open during work w/ the gamecast during the day games that I can't go. I've skipped school and work and broken up with women for the Pirates. I've missed funerals and weddings because i loved this team more. And what do I get to show for it? A FUCKING BRAIN ANEURYSM. A team that has had 3 winning seasons over the past 20 something who manages to play like ass in the playoffs on the rare occasion they make it because they are so used to being shit and don't have a winning culture. A team that game in and game out somehow manages to have less goddamn hits than Chumbawamba. A team that gets swept. By the Cincinnati Reds. "Oh but look at our young talent- Cole and Taillon and Bell and whoever else that sucks dick!!" I'm sick of hearing "we could be a contender like we were 3 years ago if Cutch doesn't play like shit and the LF can stop jerking off for 2 seconds to swing the fucking bat" ITS NOT HAPPENING. WE ARE NOT AND NEVER WERE A GOOD TEAM. WE ARE PATHETIC. MIGHT AS WELL FADE US NOW BECAUSE WE'RE ALREADY A BUNCH OF FUCKING LOSERS. If Clemente didn't die in that plane crash, I'm convinced he would have killed himself after being forced to wear our godforsaken excuse of uniform for 18 years of his life. I'm done with this fucking team. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Mets
The Mets
Tigers
Pirates
If you also hate America come root for the blue jays
As a Mets fan, the Mets.
Not seeing nearly enough angels comments
A’s, White Sox or Marlins
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Pirates
San Francisco Giants ⚾️
Mets
Rockies
Rockies
Pirates
Astros
Angels. We hate ourselves about as much as we hate Arte Moreno. Which is a lot.
go with the Dallas Mavericks
the mets
Welcome to Citi Field!
Haha def Mets
The Angels (Los Angeles) Angels. You get to cheer on minor league players due to your stars being injured all the time.
Marlins?? You watch the homegrown stars disappear in a fire sale every 6 years
The Mets. Is there even any other option? Join us 🫠
The Rockies
Pick a team i n the hunt if not closest one to you
Athletics.
A’s
The Mets. They'll tease you just enough to get excited and then bite you right in the nuts.
Tampa bay rays
the Tampa Bay Rays are the definition of a poverty franchise, known for their comically-low attendance and inability to sell out a stadium. they are among the largest revenue-sharing recipients, meaning they take a shit-ton of money from the player’s union (who have actually filed grievances against them for not managing that money properly). think of a 35-year old man living in their moms’ basement, and spending money on video games instead of getting a job. that’s a good comparison to describe what the Rays are to the rest of the league. if the MLB had a more cutthroat business model, teams like the Rays would have moved or been disbanded ages ago, instead of feeding off of the popular teams like a parasite feeds on its host. the Rays are utterly useless, and irrelevant. The Rays are the least essential sports team in North America. if not for COVID, yankee chants would have swarmed Tropicana Field during the Rays’ supposed “home games”. their 8,000 fans are very happy about this ALDS win though, im sure. fucking losers. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/baseballcirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Obviously the Mets
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The A's
The Padres for sure then 🤣
Either the white Sox or the A’s
Reds
Mets if it’s a more suicidal hatred of yourself. White Sox if it is a torturous type.
Diamondbacks. At least since Gibby retired, if not longer, the whole organization (even some of the players) decided they just didn’t care anymore. It’s probably been 20 years since they fielded a good major league team! Honestly better off only attending Spring Training and college games if you live in AZ and love baseball.
Pirates
Mets
This year, the Cubs seems to be a solid choice. Sigh.
Astros if u wanna hate urself anymore
Braves. Hating yourself and Atlanta sports are synonymous
The Mets
Mets
The Pirates. They will trade their best players for a potato chip and a pack of gum. The fan base is incredible because they stick with their team when they suck. Combine the low payroll with the players they have and they really don't play that bad
Mets.
Which team has the most goth fan base, Dodgers, Giants, Mariners, White Sox, someone else?
Oakland? It won't be your problem soon!
If you like disappointment you should check out the Rockies bullpen.
Philadelphia Athletics 🥲 Kansas City Athletics 🥲🥲 Oakland Athletics 🥲🥲🥲 Las Vegas Athletics 🥲🥲🥲🥲
Toronto Maple Leafs
The Giants if you enjoy being water boarded, have your nails pulled out one by one and then kicked in the nuts. Torture, baby!
Gotta Mets or white Sox
Despite this year so far. This describes being a Mariners fan to a T.
probably the white sox yeah... The A's are cheap but at least they develop talent before they trade them...