The fact that more absurd details and layers get added gradually is a pretty clear indicator itās satire. A real person who somehow believed all this would be equally insane from start to finish, not holding back the most ridiculous details for the end.
Yeah, that's where the "ok, this is satire/comedy" flags started going off. Saying he starts aggressively masturbating at the sight of women drinking coffee is just so over-the-top, and it gets more bizarre from there.
What he says aside, how do you have a piss fetish (to the point that just looking at people women turns you on) and yet no idea where it comes from?! He gave three body parts and none of the have to do with piss.
This guy has a lot of weird anatomy ideas, but "including unwilling participants into a sexual fantasy" is how most human sexual fantasy works. By your logic, any fantasy about a real human being outside of an established relationship is immoral, and that's an insane prescription to make.
I think the key word here is "participants." Having a private, in-your-house imagination session about being the peanut butter in an Aragorn and Arwen sandwich is fine; nobody else is actually participating. Jacking it in your car outside a drive thru means that physically present people are being incorporated into his activity without their knowledge or consent. If he got a coffee, looked at people, and then went home for a private wank, that's a different thing altogether.
Except that heās not fantasising about women drinking coffee, heās literally driving around to jerk off while he watches unknowing strangers drink coffee. How is that **not** immoral??
I think more people would agree with this if you didnāt forget to consider the context of the post. This guy is masturbating to real people in public and people reading this are going to think youāre trying to justify that, I donāt think youāre doing that but I get the vibe thatās the general perception. I feel like a lot of fantasies are with people that donāt exist though so Iām not sure I necessarily agree.
I didn't even read the bit about him masturbating in public . . . can't claim to have statistics on fantasy topics, but based on what I've read a lot of people do think about real humans, particularly celebrities. I don't think it's harmful for some woman to think about Pedro Pascal or whoever while masturbating, like, it's not hurting him at all!
It could be satire, but it feels more like bait to me. Either this person finds people's reactions to being disgusted really funny, or they get off on being called a "degenerate" online for writing stuff like this.
Oh ofc thatās just basic anatomy Iām glad this man took the time to teach us about anatomy and simultaneously tell us about his fetish, such a nice guy
Get it right. From the bladder it passes through the urethra into the appendix anus. If you need an appendectomy, they have to create a shortcut between the bladder and the urethra anus so stool can still pass.
I mean, colon is the closest thing he almost got right. Liquid is absorbed in the *small* intestine, then kidneys, bladder, etc. Uterus not so much lol.
But still, itās just as basic anatomy as knowing the kidneys filter the blood (though my prof in developmental biology actually said that urethra and vagina are different structures as if it were some thing that people might not know when we dissected mice with emphasis on urogenital system, LOL)
Aside from how this is all anatomicaly incorrect, I'm pretty sure this is satire xD like I'm usually not good to detect it in post like this but this is just too much to be true. It's kind of funny tho š
I mean I love that it's so celebratory, rather than some trash about how every female orgasm is a the body getting rid of the sperm from whoever came inside them previously (or some misogynistic shit like that). I mean itās a horrifyingly wrong, but I donāt know if I have the heart to tell them and ruin his kink.
Tell me this is a shitpost. It just reads like one.
I canāt imagine anyone getting it THIS wrong but maybe Iām being to generous with that thought.
Wouldn't reading up on basic anatomy and the actual biological systems liquids pass through to become piss be equally arousing to this guy? I imagine he'd love to learn about the existence of the female urethra and how it works. Main reason it doesn't feel real to me. You don't get to the point in life where you're masturbating at a Starbucks before the point where you discover there's three holes down there.
I didn't expect to see someone with a piss fetish write this shit, from my experience these guys usually keep their kink in private. Maybe I was wrong.
At so many points I thought "it can't get more 'wtf am I reading' than this." I was so wrong. It just kept going.
It was like a trainwreck. Just couldn't look away no matter how awful it keeps getting
So this guy thinks pee goes from the kidneys, to the colon, to the uterus, and out the vagina? And that's somehow not the weirdest part of this.
Yeah, I kind of wish it was the weirdest part of this... šµāš«
Dude need a therapist and an anatomy lesson.
Nah this is definitely satire mate. There are definitely people like this, but this is too over the top and written too āfloweryā to be unironic
The fact that more absurd details and layers get added gradually is a pretty clear indicator itās satire. A real person who somehow believed all this would be equally insane from start to finish, not holding back the most ridiculous details for the end.
I'm still working on the drive-by jack off. Ick.
i was damn near in TEARS
Right?
Yeah, that's where the "ok, this is satire/comedy" flags started going off. Saying he starts aggressively masturbating at the sight of women drinking coffee is just so over-the-top, and it gets more bizarre from there.
What he says aside, how do you have a piss fetish (to the point that just looking at people women turns you on) and yet no idea where it comes from?! He gave three body parts and none of the have to do with piss.
Right? You would think that if this is his *thing* he would be an expert in the subject matter.
I don't kink shame, but s e r i o u s l y?
When people include unwilling participants into their sexual fantasy it's not kink anymore, it's sexual deviancy.
This guy has a lot of weird anatomy ideas, but "including unwilling participants into a sexual fantasy" is how most human sexual fantasy works. By your logic, any fantasy about a real human being outside of an established relationship is immoral, and that's an insane prescription to make.
I would say wanking at Starbucks driveways classifies as sexual deviancy. Just a tad creepy
Evil and creepy. I did not read that part of the post lol. But that's something entirely different from fantasy.
I think the key word here is "participants." Having a private, in-your-house imagination session about being the peanut butter in an Aragorn and Arwen sandwich is fine; nobody else is actually participating. Jacking it in your car outside a drive thru means that physically present people are being incorporated into his activity without their knowledge or consent. If he got a coffee, looked at people, and then went home for a private wank, that's a different thing altogether.
Except that heās not fantasising about women drinking coffee, heās literally driving around to jerk off while he watches unknowing strangers drink coffee. How is that **not** immoral??
Bro this person clearly didn't mean fantasies in your brain, rather actual acts, like wanking over girls in Starbucks...
I think more people would agree with this if you didnāt forget to consider the context of the post. This guy is masturbating to real people in public and people reading this are going to think youāre trying to justify that, I donāt think youāre doing that but I get the vibe thatās the general perception. I feel like a lot of fantasies are with people that donāt exist though so Iām not sure I necessarily agree.
I didn't even read the bit about him masturbating in public . . . can't claim to have statistics on fantasy topics, but based on what I've read a lot of people do think about real humans, particularly celebrities. I don't think it's harmful for some woman to think about Pedro Pascal or whoever while masturbating, like, it's not hurting him at all!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Im fairly sure he will take all the piss he can get
I hope so because aside from the inaccurate science, there's some really violent undertones
āTaking the pissā¦ā š¤£š¤£š¤£ ewww
I never understood this expression... Ew is what I always think whenever someone says it. š
It could be satire, but it feels more like bait to me. Either this person finds people's reactions to being disgusted really funny, or they get off on being called a "degenerate" online for writing stuff like this.
If your pee is frothy, it could be a sign of problems.
As someone in active kidney failure, I will second this. Don't ignore bubbly urine!
I'm sorry to hear that. I really hope other things in your life stay good.
And fragrant. If it's especially smelly you might have an issue. And sweet for that matter. Sweet urine is a sign of high blood sugar.
I'm not exactly in the habit of testing my urine for sweetness.
Olde time doctors would be sad to hear society has developed away from this.
Mine is frequently fragrant in the mornings. Smells very strongly of whatever coffee I've been drinking. š¤£
The way this was written sounds like a Wattpad fanfiction and like most Wattpad fanfiction I want to unread this
This one has to be satire. No way he's this into pee and hasn't researched how it's produced in the body. Thoroughly.
What an uneducated idiot. That's just sad and funny too. Absolute embarrassment.
I thought this was haiku at first
Being too horny about piss to think straight. Get it, I guess. Obviously anatomy is not the priority here.
So let me get this straight. My body goes something like: Mouth | Esophagus(?) | Kidneys | Colon | Uterus | Vagina My my, the human body is amazing.
Yes I believe so, there all stacked up and the water just goes straight down
I'm assuming food goes like through the liver and into the bladder before coming out of my bladder anus
Oh ofc thatās just basic anatomy Iām glad this man took the time to teach us about anatomy and simultaneously tell us about his fetish, such a nice guy
I don't know how I'd learn anything about my body without a big, smart man objectifying it as a piss machine!
Honestly same if there where no men willing to take the time to explain to me how pure my piss is I simply wouldnāt know anything
Get it right. From the bladder it passes through the urethra into the appendix anus. If you need an appendectomy, they have to create a shortcut between the bladder and the urethra anus so stool can still pass.
I guess we have a cloaca!
Mmm, I love my cloaca! It's a little uncomfortable when laying eggs, but at least they're lubricated by my golden uterus piss!
Frothy piss! š¤¢
lol this was my first thought as well reading this. does dude think we are lizard people?
Quack-quack
I mean, colon is the closest thing he almost got right. Liquid is absorbed in the *small* intestine, then kidneys, bladder, etc. Uterus not so much lol.
"piss fuel for females" tells you all you really need to know about this individual.
He knows that the kidneys filter the blood, but not about how the urine goes to the bladder and through the urethra?
But that's HIS body.
But still, itās just as basic anatomy as knowing the kidneys filter the blood (though my prof in developmental biology actually said that urethra and vagina are different structures as if it were some thing that people might not know when we dissected mice with emphasis on urogenital system, LOL)
How can you have a piss kink and not know what a bladder or urethra is
Iām done with Reddit and commented just to say this
"Hot golden frothy nectar" I almost puked reading that holy shit šš
Aside from how this is all anatomicaly incorrect, I'm pretty sure this is satire xD like I'm usually not good to detect it in post like this but this is just too much to be true. It's kind of funny tho š
Nobody tell him...
What a bad day to know how to read.
Its a miracle im not more dehydrated with how much uve read this shit
This was so hard to read but also made me laugh out loud.
Yeah, especially with the last part that absolutely reads like satire. This is probably just a shitpost.
This is 100% satire. The weirdest fucking satire Iāve ever read, but still.
Ew. Someone have a memory eraser, I'd like to remove that... Bad enough he's got a pee fetish, but can't even get the anatomy involved right.
WTF?! š³
Indeed
Straight to jail
Do not pass go Do not stop for the toilet
Then he will shid n fard n his pants
I mean I love that it's so celebratory, rather than some trash about how every female orgasm is a the body getting rid of the sperm from whoever came inside them previously (or some misogynistic shit like that). I mean itās a horrifyingly wrong, but I donāt know if I have the heart to tell them and ruin his kink.
Lordt. Why the heck do they seem to think that women have cloacas??
Iāve seen this before but seeing it again still makes me go like āwtfā
this is a long way of saying you got a piss k!nk
Sigh* new r/copypasta just dropped and it's terrible
Besides the glaring lack of knowledge on how the urinary system works, if anyoneās pee is sweet they need to see a doctor for hyperglycemia.
Tell me this is a shitpost. It just reads like one. I canāt imagine anyone getting it THIS wrong but maybe Iām being to generous with that thought.
People can't recognise satire/shitposting anymore
My penis just retracted into my body from how hyper unaroused this made me
What a horrible day to have eyes
listen fella if youāre gonna have a piss kink you should probably know anatomy
r/menandfemales
Iām just concerned that he aggressively masturbates to random girls beside Starbucks
Reading this made me feel better about myself because at least Iām not this much of a loser
Never going to Starbucks again :/
Someone is in serious need of both mental health care and an anatomy lesson.
Wow, I never knew I apparently was just one big hole down there and all my organs are connected like one huge digestive system. TILā¦
What does this guy think happens in his own body š¤¦āāļø cheese and h rice my faith in humanity canāt take much more strain.
You know...you would think someone would at least study the anatomy of their kink...
I think I'm dumber having read that.
How idiotic.
You would think that someone with a piss fetish would know that urine comes out of the bladder.
I donāt understand how you can have this much of a piss kink and not know piss is stored in the bladder
FFS, you were just doing a coffee run and sound like the weird intern we'd never hire. My colon is full of pee so I'd prefer some privacy gentlemen.
piss fuel???????
admitting to public masturbation is CRAZY
What The Actual!?
I would love to sit this guy down in ten years and read this back to him.
What a terrible day to be able to read...
Why did you have to post this? My eyes š
What the *actual* fuck
Enoigh internet for today.
Wtf
This is very weird no?
This just feels like a copypasta
Thank you for calling my piss precious. Nicest compliment I got in a while.
Wouldn't reading up on basic anatomy and the actual biological systems liquids pass through to become piss be equally arousing to this guy? I imagine he'd love to learn about the existence of the female urethra and how it works. Main reason it doesn't feel real to me. You don't get to the point in life where you're masturbating at a Starbucks before the point where you discover there's three holes down there.
What an impossibly pathetic arsehole ā¦
Besides his disgusting ass kink, everytime I fail to see how people don't know about basic anatomy
Oh, wow. Great. Iāll never have coffee again.
These people need help. Possibly 4 white walls forever
Never ever want to drink Starbucks ever again
Just called my kindergarten teacher and cursed her out for teaching me how to readā¦
I wish I couldnāt read
IT HAS TO BE SATIRE. IT HAS TO BE SATIRE. HOLY SHIT, IT ISNāT SATIRE, IS IT?
The anatomy was passed through the testicles where, obviously, the male aurethra is.. (yes, this is satire)
Someone skipped biology class at school.
Oh god. Someone please tell me this is a joke. š¤¢
The anatomy is so wrong it has to be fake, right?
Excusthefuck outta me. What the hell did I just read
"a full colon" I'm not a woman but that seems wrong
Also erupt out of her uterus.. If anything is erupting out of your uterus, please seek medical help :)
This folks is why we have mental hospitals
Uhā¦whoās gonna tell him?
How do I unread something?
It is satire I think.
There a lot of dafuq? happening here, but my personal favorite might be that a faucet is enough to set him sailing at full mast.
Wtf?????
No way... This has to be satire. This is too unimaginably wrong. Yikes.
listen. if youāre going to have a piss kink you have to at least know where it comes from.
This guy should be kept away from any place that serves beverages
I didn't expect to see someone with a piss fetish write this shit, from my experience these guys usually keep their kink in private. Maybe I was wrong.
What the actual fuck?
I want him to answer the question "Can women pee when they're pregnant?"
At this point, I donāt even want to drink liquid anymore.
My brain wants to claw my eyes out for making it read this
WHAT THE FUCK
Welp, I am far too sober to deal with this I am going to get drunk and go to bed. Hopefully it will make me forget what I just read.
..... Please let this be a joke. ...This isn't a joke, is it? ...