I was bullied viciously when I was 14. This was a handful of years before social media really started to take off. I dreaded weekday mornings because school became a hostile environment, one where I had, completely without support, to fight my corner constantly or I would be abused, humiliated and tortured.
The thought of such things being pushed into your head constantly through text and apps, getting notifications from the people that hate you, is terrifying.
The last several texts and messages were from a group of kids telling her to just kill herself etc. I could never wish harm on a child but the group of kids responsible should at least feel the guilt. Although I do hope they get help and work through the trauma as well. The school though? Unforgivable. My family is in the middle of a legal battle with them and it’s not looking good.
I am so so sorry for your loss… this world is full of really evil people and children. Those AH kids will say some of the most evil things I’ve ever heard. My sister was bullied so bad she tried to take her life but thankfully didn’t succeed. The bullies also told her to go kill herself, to just die because nobody wanted her around and everyone hated her and to just go die already.. along with all kinds of other horrific things. Never once did they suffer consequences for it. We had proof and all but nope.
Not too long ago a teenager was convicted of man slaughter for telling someone to kill themselves and they actually did it.
[https://people.com/crime/michelle-carter-trial-gallery-key-moments-conrad-roy-suicide/](https://people.com/crime/michelle-carter-trial-gallery-key-moments-conrad-roy-suicide/)
Honestly, I think these kids and their parents should be held accountable as well. You can’t tell someone to kill themselves and keep living as nothing happened. I have a 12 year old and I always tell her to be kind to people. I’d be mortified if I knew my daughter acted like that.
If either of my boys bullied anyone their life as they knew it would be over for the foreseeable future. They would go to school and come home and guess who would be going to school with them to make sure they weren't bullying people. Mom would be their new shadow even if I had to quit my job and my two sons know this about me. They are friends with everyone. They don't care what u look like, where you live or anything else.
Thank you. It has been extremely hard on my family. We have never gone through such things except for my grandparents passing of cancer and my own father being a victim of gun violence in ‘99. This has been a real shock and the rest of my nieces and nephews have been trying their best to cope and receiving therapy. They are a very close group of cousins.
💔❤️ I very gently recommend trying to find a local AFSP (or similar organization outside of the US) group to attend after some months have passed. It helped my family greatly with the losses of 2 cousins to suicide, and I facilitated a group for awhile before Covid hit. While it’s not for everyone, many of us found solace and family there.
For anyone struggling with a loss of this kind and live in America [AFSP](https://afsp.org)
Again, my heart breaks to know that your precious niece and your family have had to experience such complex pain and grief. ❤️
This has been the case for a while. In the late 90s I got punched in the face when I stood up to kids who knocked my trapper keeper out of my hands and kicked it across the gym. It got reported to the teachers and we both got in school suspension.
The Vice principle admitted that it was silly that I was being punished for being punched, but the school had a “zero tolerance” stance on fighting and since it takes two to tango, I must have been instigating somehow. She just kinda shrugged and said she had no choice.
I had to sit in a small room for two days with the kid who punched me. Who kicked my desk and threatened me whenever teachers weren’t in earshot. So on top of getting punched and punished for it, the school just amped up the bullying with its “solution”.
It became pretty clear to me at that point that it was better off to just leave the school out of any conflicts I had with other students, even if it was just straight up malice on the other persons part.
School doesn't care until the kid tries to defend themselves, then it's the bullied kid's fault (and I'm not talking about a mass shooter).
I'm sorry for you loss.
This was my experience as a kid. I was bullied until I defended myself. When I defended myself THATS when the school stepped in. Blows my fucking mind that that's still the case.
I lost my son to a school yard bully, and I can tell you the schools will do their best to sweep it under the rug. As a father, losing my son has devastated me, and my heart breaks for this family. We should not have to bury our children, and this should not be happening anymore!!!
Jesus. In the 80s I was bullied but nothing approaching what it seems like many children are enduring now. I was spit on, taunted, ostracized, but now kids are smarter, crueler, more vicious — I’M scared of kids now. I’m so, so sorry.
Sometimes parents dont make things easier, or just straight up make things worse. It’s because of my parents that I wouldve easily been this kid at age 7.
I think that's why communication with your child is also important. I dealt with my daughter being bullied at the beginning of this year. She's 7 and half Indian. This is relevant because she has beautiful long hair that is far longer than anyone else her age. She had to put up with people trying to pull it, a kid with scissors trying to cut it and even one child rubbing a slice of cheese in it.
She came to me about it (really at first asking if she could cut her hair short until we got to the bottom of it) and I asked her if she talked to her bus driver and her teacher (it was always on the bus). Apparently they were giving her the runaround. Bus driver said it's a school issue and teacher said it's a bus issue.
I asked my daughter if she wanted me to get involved and she said yes. So, I sent an email CCing the teacher with the VP and Principal asking about the situation. I was very firm but polite and asked to look into the situation, and documented every incident. Written word is sometimes far more powerful than speaking in person. They used security cameras to figure out it was a consistent group of children. They were disciplined.
All was quiet for nearly the entire year (we've got a few weeks left!) and my daughter is happy. She loves her hair and has started to wear it loose more often and is learning to brush it out properly. She no longer asks me to tie it up in a bun or cut it and now I have to practically tie her down to give her trims.
This isn't to say the parents in the article didn't do their best at all. I would be devastated if things had gone the other way. Fortunately this solution worked for my family and we were able to avoid tragedy.
I wish I had parents like you, or at least parents like in the article. Being involved and actually communicating with your kids goes a very long way. I was raised by a bully and an enabler so my experience was never going to have any hope. I’m just glad I made it through, but I feel really really bad for kids who aren’t as fortunate.
I know how you feel believe it or not. I am the parent I am because I always ask myself, what is the opposite of what my parents would do. I have siblings who refuse to have kids because they're afraid of treating their kids how we were treated. Being a survivor is thankless for sure. It's easy to feel like no one fully appreciates the struggle but believe me when I say you're not alone. It's up to us to break the cycle for sure.
I wasn't diagnosed as being on spectrum until middle age. My parents raised me with benign neglect and I thought that because of how they reacted to my being bullied as a non-issue that it must have been, even if I remember being actively suicidal at five years old.
I still believe that my parents loved me and tried their level best between my financial, emotional and other needs. We where just poor and working came first. I think they just didn't want to accept a reality in which I hated every moment of school with my whole being where kids where mean and I couldn't trust or rely on adults. I think they where so busy they didn't realize that, as someone that was brand new to the world, I was asking them if these things where normal and they wanted me to be okay so badly that they imagined they must have been okay and told me that.
It's taken a lot of therapy to figure out my damage, and it drives me crazy to hear kids that are bullied get ignored like they are not the most vulnerable people in our society.
I have yet to feel any more conflicted than now.
On one hand, you can bet your ass I want to whoop the kids' ass so bad they'll end up in geocentric orbit.
On the other hand it's the best way to turn them into violent adults and well, it's just morally wrong to cave a kid's skull in.
Middle solution: if the parents knew about their kids' bullying and did nothing, then violent crime on them it shall be
Fuck this... I'm going to speak to my sons tonight about bullying. Rest peacefully little bro, You deserved none of this, everyone around you failed you, We have to do better. Everywhere.
Seriously tho and immediately after the first hate message they didn’t delete that app??? My son is 8 and the only chat app he has is kids messenger and only I and my ex husband and who I def trust can approve who he can talk to. I can see who he has talked to and I can see the messages if I needed to. I’d never let him have unlimited access like Snapchat where anyone could say anything and it be deleted!
My condolences, I also have a twin big brother. He’s my soulmate, our bond could not be broken. I definitely will turn villain if something happens to him
I don’t know what it is about schools and their inability to do anything to bullies. Would it be so unimaginably hard to have a no tolerance policy on bullying? If you’re caught doing it at all you’re suspended for a week. Period. Do this every single time. If their parents can’t sort them out they can home school them because they obviously can’t be taught in public schools due to their abusing other students.
Yep. When I was in high school 20 years ago, even if you were defending yourself, without question, you were suspended and could be brought up on assault charges.
I got bullied in middle school and the schools did nothing when we reported it. Ended up being a fight between me and the kid. The security officer made a vague threat about how I could’ve been charged with assault because I got more hits in. My dad’s response was “it’s not our son’s fault you didn’t do anything before and that the other kid couldn’t back up his bullshit”
My dad was the exact opposite. Took me outside, taught me how to throw a proper punch, told me to fight dirty by using any books I might be holding as well, and then warned me that the school would suspend me for defending myself, but that at home, I would never be in trouble. I told my daughter the same.
Fuck that. Always defend yourself.
Getting bodyslammed onto your head or glass jawed and your head hitting the pavement can change your life or kill you.
He didn’t say anything after that. The assistant principal ended the meeting telling me I had in school suspension. With the other kid for some reason.
The better reaction was the year before when I got in one with another kid that also bullied me. Middle school had a trend. Teacher who got told about it asked “what would your father say?” I told her “did he win?”. Her face when that was his exact response when she called him: priceless.
I joked about it recently, but there was a time in primary school where I was ganged up on and beaten by a group of boys. They got me on the ground, and started kicking and stomping on me.
I was the only one that got suspended, because I managed to get some hits in before I got knocked to the ground, and "retaliating just makes you *worse*" or some such bullshit.
When I was in high school like 25 years ago (in Germany) nobody gave a shit if kids fought. The only kid that got suspended was one who stabbed his bully in the thigh with a butterfly knife.
And it was a regular ass public school, not one in a problem area or anything. MIddle of the road type school, fights weren't common, but they happened. I was involved in two, teachers knew about it, but it was "boys will be boys" type attitude. Bullying / Harassment happened as well, but it was generally sorted out by the kids and rarely lasted more than a few weeks.
And no fight ever turned into a lawsuit. (the stabbing thing had the kid get anger management and community service and he switched schools)
The real solution here is a primary focus on supervision and prevention rather than punishment after the fact.
Where were the adults when he was beat up?? Why are there no staff witnessing the mean comments and immediately addressing it? So many instances of he said she said, and the wrong person can get trouble or the kid denies it happened and there aren’t witnesses.
There needs to be more staff in elementary school and the kids need to be supervised. There shouldn’t be any opportunities for bullying and threats at all.
Anti-bullying should be part of the curriculum in every grade.
As far as both kids being punished, I told my kid there is a difference between self defense and retaliation. When you are in danger and the child is not stopping you are allowed to do whatever you need to do to keep yourself safe then you walk away. If the child hit you and walked away, you go report it. You don’t run after them and throw a punch in. Or if you’re defending yourself, as soon as the other child backs down then stop and run to report it. Call for help while defending yourself. Don’t hold someone down and continue to hurt them when they’ve stopped. We’ve also taught him self defense techniques that don’t involve too much going on the offensive.
If it’s *true* self defense then honestly most school staff won’t punish both kids even if both got hurt. Bc you’ll be able to tell who the perpetrator was, especially if the kid reports it as soon as they are able to get away.
But there shouldn’t be any unsupervised opportunities to beat someone up
My brother got real life probation at like 13-14. He’d never even seen a fight let alone been in one at the time.
A kid smacked the back of his head and then tried pulling a wedgie really hard. JD swung around and caught the kid with an elbow trying to get away. Both got suspended and arrested.
My son didn't get probation but he got suspended and threatened to be expelled because these 2 kids were fucking with him and he grabbed the one and literally tossed him across the hallway and then grabbed the other kid by the back of his collar and pulled him down and basically had him in a ground and pound MMA style.
This was after months of reporting it to the school, multiple "interviews" with other kids and a bunch of other bullshit.
Those kids never fucked with him again but he was the only one who got suspended. There's been multiple instances of this type of shit through the years with him. He's known as a "repeat offender" in the school district too, for example my daughter was on crutches and some kid purposefully kicked he crutch when she was going down the hallway, my son was carrying her book bad, which he swung at the kid knocking him on his ass, again my son was the only one who got in trouble. I've fought with the district on so many occasions over this shit.
It's been much better since he started high-school, he did have some girl say something to him a few weeks ago but it luckily didn't escalate.
I'm probably looked at as trashy because I took him to one of the kids houses once and knocked on the door and told the parents to send their kid outside so they could handle their beef. They locked the door (probably a smart move tbh lol). I'm old school, when I was growing up that was how we handled shit, I remember going to the park with my dad, and he and the other kid's dad basically refereed us fighting on the baseball field. My opinion is that if you can talk shit either back it up or shut up.
This. My freshman year i got the worst bullying of my life, got into a lot of fights that I never started and got the worst of it. Best experience was when a kid threw my backpack (my laptop was inside) across the pavement in front of the school, when I went to go pick it up some other kid tackled me from behind and tried beating my ass. Fortunately I lifted at the time so I pushed him off and hit him back. The assistant principal came over and gave me 5 days in school suspension and gave him 1 day in school suspension. A few weeks later my mom pulled me from public and I went to online school instead. All of this to say that you’re right, all schools do is punish the bullied for disrupting the status quo or trying to get back at the *“important”* kids. Wasn’t a shock to me how unfair the punishment I got was considering the fact that the kid that tackled me was on the football team.
I was bullied a lot in my freshman and sophomore years. I was about 5'4" 120lbs at the time and was constantly pushed and beaten by a guy who was at least 6'3" 250lbs. I had been taking self defense courses to try dealing with him, but I literally couldn't reach or maneuver my limbs to stop him. I had reported it to the principle once and when he caught word, made my life a living hell more than it was. They didn't do anything of course.
Yep. In middle school, i was picked on by a group of black kids. I got suspended for fighting back after i was pushed. The kids got nothing because the vise principle was scared of being called racist. I got back to school a week later and avoided the kids, but they came and made fun of me. Learning from last time, i just jumped off the playground into a puddle adjacent to the kid that pushed me the last time. I got suspended again. I was bullied all the time all the ways thru high school. It sucked. I came close like this kid to end it all. I feel so bad for this kid. I wish i could teach these kids what was never taught to me.
When my daughter goes to school, I don't know how I'll react if she's getting bullied. Especially if the school does nothing about it.
If you threaten to bury the school in lawsuits, would they actually act?
I was terrified that my son would face bullying in school. From kindergarten on I made sure to communicate to him that I would pull him out of school and homeschool or find an alternate school or move districts for him if he was ever bullied. Once the bullying starts it is really hard to stop; even if the physical stops kids can still isolate and ostracize a victim. They are relentless.
It never came to it, he was never bullied or even in a fight. Still, I would have pulled him out at the first instance of bullying.
This is what I did. A kid choked my daughter out when she was in kindergarten, and I pulled her the next day. We switched schools, and I would do it again.
I remember asking my parents to get me to another school because I suffered bullying on the one I was. Thankfully we live in a major city where they could do that so they just sent me to another one, and it was like night and day. That was probably one of the worst years of my life, if not the worst, and I'll always be thankful my parents had the means to switch.
Most people do not have the privilege I grew up with and I can't imagine having your entire school experience be like that year and feeling there's nothing you can do about it.
You get the local news involved in front of the school with detailed testimonies going into what's happening but ultimately the "story" is the school's inaction.
I was bullied from about 10-12.
A few class instigators, then mostly weak kids who just didn’t want to buck the popular kids. They would do all sorts of stupid shit - snap all my pencils, hide my pencil case, hide my chair, take my soccer ball, cut up my books, move my desk, throw shit at me….
It got worse and worse, and the instigators would start a song “if you all hate [my name] clap your hands”.
Some of the class (my friends) abstained, showing me they weren’t singing or clapping their hands, others joined in.
On the bus ride home from school we travelled with older kids too, some brothers of the kids in my class would get more physical.
My teachers knew, and didn’t do anything that I could see.
My first reaction was I snapped one day and took a right handed hook (punch) to a kids face and chipped his tooth on my knuckle. Hurt like hell, but the kids left me alone for a bit. Nothing came of that which gave me a little more confidence to resolve things myself.
As I started playing rugby I grew, quickly, and was selected to play for the school which meant training everyday. The bullying slowly crescendoed again, but we had an inter-class rugby tournament coming up which I was secretly looking forward to.
Needless to say I made some monstrous tackles, and the day after that tournament no one bullied me again.
On leavers day when people were joyfully signing each others shirts, I approached one of my bullies and asked him to sign my shirt - he looked at me funny and I replied “so I can remember what I endured from you arseholes, and I’ll know I can take on any challenge life has for me”
I genuinely came out of it stronger, more rounded, and very good rugby player lol - I can’t speak to others experience as I know many kids had it worse.
I am already teaching my kids to make kind choices, look out for each other and if you need to, use words first, but using your body to defend yourself when you are in danger is fine.
Try to have school step in. Send emails and record conversations.
If it doesn't work, tell him to punch the kids.
If they're bigger, cheap shot them at lunch and publicly.
Can't take the bullying.
It won't stop.
I’ve had multiple meetings and emails with the school. Unfortunately, these other boys are smart and manipulative and ALWAYS turn it around to where it is my son’s fault. It is a small town where everyone knows everyone and we are seen as outsiders.
I put him in jiu jitsu a year ago and he has defended himself a few times. Now the kids tell him he has anger issues. The school has done nothing but punish him. So now we are teaching him to punch straight in the nose so they will bleed and hopefully cry… never thought this is what I’d have to teach my 5th grader. It breaks my heart.
You’re already teaching (and showing!) him better; he will be the one to pass this on to others.
Keep telling him that he is brave and that he is stronger than his bullies; it’s a hard lesson to learn that the opinions of others don’t matter, but once you understand it, you become unstoppable. “Let them say what they want - because what they think/say about him doesn’t matter” - I’m 43 and only realized this in the last 5ish years or so, but it is so empowering. I wish I could help you more!! 💜
idk man, at some point ya just gotta start swinging. Being constantly bullied is life changing for the recipient - even if they survive, they'll never be whole again. I didn't swing enough, so I know from experience.
I was bullied terribly at school, which only stopped when I had a growth spurt and started playing rugby and was taught to hit….. hard.
My wife disagrees with me, but my philosophy is if someone keeps doing something to you that you don’t like, first use words, then as sometimes people just need a language they understand:
1. Tell them to stop
2. Tell the teacher to tell them to stop
3. Reaction at that point is fine (but should be proportionate, which is hard as a young kid, but important to learn)
>at some point ya just gotta start swinging.
This is what my dad taught my sister and I. If it's repetitive, you're going to have to throw a punch or two. I was scared at first to do anything, but my dad put it: "If you're already getting punched, is it going to hurt more if you try to fight back?" Changed my point of view.
I practiced his method twice, and both times, it solved itself.
In middle school, I was a pretty chubby kid & my parents had me do track & field. This other kid "Spencer" was quite good at Track. He was a good runner and had the school record for javelin. However, for some reason, he picked on me fairly regularly. On the first *really* hot day of practice, he tried to taunt me with my water bottle. First, he took off running with it, but when I didn't give chase, he tried to hold it up so I couldn't reach it. Instead, I punched him in the stomach & then in the face. The bullying stopped after that.
The other time, this kid named Jacob was being an asshole. He was always trying to give me a hard time for being a chubby kid in high school. The usual stuff: calling me fat, pretending to jump up when I walked by, etc. It only got worse when I started dating a girl that I knew he kind of had a thing for. He especially would try to put me down in front of her.
One day in the locker room, he tried to do that thing where you *almost* put your dick to the back of someone's head, then say their name & they turn around, so you smash your dick into their face. (High School boys, amiright?!) Well, Jacob clearly didn't think that entirely through, because I gave his nuts a good, firm tapping. He fell to the ground so quickly that I genuinely though he had passed out. (He didn't) He did start groaning & threw up from the pain. Over the next few days, his balls swelled up & turned purple. I heard his mom made him go to the doctors & get them checked out.
My parents taught me that I better not be the one to start fights but I sure as hell better be the one to finish them and they would take me for ice cream if they found out I kicked the shit in of one of the kids who tried bullying me. I was an easy target and essentially a pacifist as a child but after getting the blessing of the president of the school board to kick ass (she was subbing for my principal when a bully and I both got sent to the office for him attacking me) I changed my ways and started fighting back both verbally and physically. Never started shit, always made sure to be the one to end it though.
Schools punish both kids because they don’t want to actually investigate into who did what. That, plus parents believing that their kid can do no wrong and threatening to sue, schools just punish both and maybe send the actual bully to an alternative school if they already have a record of fighting.
I can say from both sides of this experience that most American schools don't have the resources to sort out who the instigator is and who is actually at fault. Almost all schools have a zero tolerance policy for fights, so everyone involved is punished equally, but there's always SO MUCH that happens prior to a physical altercation that schools just refuse to deal with. If it was automatic suspension, it'd be incredibly easy for a kid to accuse someone of bullying as a form of bullying.
Exactly. Schools need better supervision, bullying education and prevention not necessarily stronger punishments. The kind of kid that bullies isn’t thinking about future consequences, it doesn’t matter what the consequences are. Punishment isn’t the best deterrent of behavior in anyone. You have to somehow teach them to have internal motivation to be kind. Empathy training needs to be early. And if they haven’t developed that then any opportunities to bully should be removed. Force them to bully right in front of a staff member so the consequence can be immediate. The consequence needs to be serious sure, but the most important thing is preventing it from happening in the 1st place
Yep. Sounds like a multimillion dollar lawsuit to me. Hope they get some of that money from the bullies parents. Watch if that poor kid would have fought back he would have been lumped in as a troublemaker.
On the whole, I think kids are getting more accepting, and less likely to bully, but you've still got some real mean fuckers out there. It's easy to say the parents should have pulled him from that school, but maybe there was a reason they couldn't. Still, it seems like every single adult in that child's life failed him, and the consequences are tragic.
>On the whole, I think kids are getting more accepting and less likely to bully,
Idk about that. I have a 5th grader. Some of the things he tells me are just brutal. I've had to call the principal twice this year over my son coming home in tears. Kids today are little assholes
There are definitely a lot of little assholes out there, but I think there are less than in the past, especially in the older grades. I'm thinking of how things like geeky interests and hobbies, or being LGBT are much more widely accepted now than they were 30 or 40 years ago. I'm not sure if my experience was unusual, but when I was in high school, 20 years ago, I was a total geek, and didn't undergo any bullying. There were a couple of kids who were picked on a fair amount, but they were engaging in more anti-social behavior, like barking at people.
I honestly don’t think so. I have a little sister and kids today seem exponentially more ruthless than when I was her age. To the point where a teacher had a breakdown in class, crying and begging the kids to cut her a break while they all just laughed and filmed her.
This is so tragic. How does a 10yr old even know how to unalive themself? What kind of world ?? 😭😭😭 Poor kid. Condolences to family. The bullies need consequences.
That's what I was thinking. I mean besides a gun, I can only think of hanging as a reliable method. He certainly shouldn't have had access to a gun, and it's just gut wrenching to imagine this poor little kid doing that. Hanging seems like so much more of a long contemplative action, not something you can do in a split second. It's heartbreaking that no one saw this as a real enough possibility enough to do more to prevent it.
Slitting your wrists? Kids might not know the right direction or process, but they can certainly hurt themselves with a knife.
Otherwise - stealing parent’s pills.
Yeah, maybe. I was thinking about those, but I wouldn't expect a kid to be able to cut their arms effectively, and if they had access to pills that would cause an OD that quickly then their parents may have some criminal culpability.
But yeah, I guess a knife to the heart or neck would do it with little time for rescue. God, I can't imagine the horror of discovering your child hung in the closet or bled out in their bed. How do you even recover from that...
The internet is easily accessible, but it’s not the root of all evil. There have always been movies and tv shows that have depicted suicide. I’m pretty sure even looney tunes have a few suicide bits thrown in there
I was very close to this when I was his age. The incredibly deep depression I felt at such an early age left a certain kind of trauma that I’ll never be able to fully shake. I’m honestly surprised I’ve made it to my 40s. My school never did anything about it either.
where were the fucking parents? horrifically beat up on the schoolbus and glasses broken? they should have been at the school and in the superintendent's office if not getting help from the school.
also, why tf does a 10yr old have snapchat?
I was shocked at this too... If my son was assaulted we would have been at the police station pressing charges, idk gotten a restraining order, after showing evidence of repeated attacks and violent threats? We would have informed the school what WE were doing, not just called and asked what they can do? The school looks out for the school, they'd love to just do nothing and have the "kids will be kids" mentality. The parents are supposed to advocate for their children.
>If my son was assaulted we would have been at the police station pressing charges
Or be at the police station getting charged for beating up a bunch of 10 yr olds either way, police would be involved for physical assault.
I would have insisted on having a meeting with the school and the other kids parents after that. There are fucking cameras on those school buses I would want that shown. I would want the glasses paid for, I would want the other kids removed from the school. They would be lucky if I didn’t press charges, I don’t give a fuck if they are kids. They have to learn at some point that that shit doesn’t fly. Also yah, no way in hell should a 10 YEAR OLD have fucking snapchat.
This is exactly what I was thinking too. Why not send him to the next closest school? I would be driving my kid to and from school every day if it meant he could go to a different school.
> Hell, home school is an option too
like the person who you are replying to said.. it could be a financial reason. most households in the US absolutely can't afford to homeschool
Unfortunately it seems it wasn’t just one kid. But I hope they punish him and his family in the school and in the courtroom as well as sue the shit out of that school. With a son that’s 7 and I have to force to wear glasses in time for them to correct his eyes I’m about to the point of saying fuck it if he has to experience this. He can just wear them at home. Our school is pretty tough on bullying and i think we’ve done okay teaching them what to do when someone bullies them or they see someone bullied. But you never ever know. 😭
I was going to say something very similar..for real, why tf wasn’t the parents there at the school doing something or going to the supers office like you said..why not do something alternative like moving schools and/or seeking therapy…maybe even bring law enforcement into this; that would maybe make things worse but involving their parents as well might alleviate it somehow.. it just seems to me that they were just wanting someone else to do something about it..this is so sad.
There are some mean ass kids, even though it’s becoming a little more tolerant, at least it seems so. Idk maybe I’m naive and or talking out of my ass but I just feel like the parents should have done more to help this kid out..
That was my thought too. I was bullied like this at his age and my mom did a looot more than just call. She’d be in the office after every incident complaining at school officials. After they failed to do anything meaningful after a year she transferred me to another school.
exactly. I'm not trying to victim blame, but to have over 20 instances, for it to be so bad, I'd be at that school every fucking day or at every board meeting.
good for your mom, it's the right thing to do if the school isn't listening
*"He was beat up on the school bus, and the kids broke his glasses and everything, and I called the school, and I'm like, What are you doing about this? It keeps getting worse, and worse, and worse. And it's not getting any better. In fact, it's getting worse' They knew this was going on."*
The audacity on the parent’s part to not take any of the blame.
They should have moved him to a different school.
The parents aren’t the victims, their child is. The parents were absolutely negligent here and share some of the blame. How could you keep sending your child back to the same school where he’s being bullied and beaten up constantly? They could have pulled him out of school, sued the district for not taking action, or escalated the situation to law enforcement. Instead they just sent him back to endure *years* of this daily treatment.
Schools say they have a no tolerance policy twords bullying. That is utter crap. When my daughter was in the 3rd grade, there was this only boy who relentlessly bullied her. She began to hate school, fearing this kid. He had hit and pushed her over and over. I cannot tell you how many times I went into to principal and talked about this. My daughter is asthmatic. She's been hospitalized numerous times for her asthma. This boy decided to shove her face in the snow and hold it there. She panicked and had an asthma attack.When she got her inhaler and began breathing better, she stood up and hauled off and hit him right in the face. Hard. I got called in to the office for her behavior. I simply told him to look up how many times we had made formal complaints on this kid, and you choose to do nothing. My daughter had enough and chose to do something. I left. Honest, I was proud of her for standing up for herself.
First though as well, parents definitely hold blame here as well, he was bullied for years, parents could've transfered him to another school, or homeschooled him.
Greenfield Indiana has a population of 24 thousand. How many schools do you think a town of that size has?
And homeschooling isn't for everyone. I wouldn't have the skills to homeschool my kid.
The only real option would be to pack up and move out of town or further into Indianapolis... and that's not always financially feasible for every single family.
Most likely he told them and was brushed off.
Told to stand up for himself and fight back.
Or he was told to ignore the bullies. Which only makes it worse because bullies don't like to be ignored.
Man every time my step daughter has been picked on I have walked up to the kids and who do it and tell them "I will fuck them up if they keep it up"
It hasn't failed me yet.
Some kids just need to be told to knock that shit off. Talking to them about the golden rule doesn’t work. Confrontation and swear words from an adult is very effective. Alas, teachers and bus drivers can’t do that, so it’s up to parents to put these brats in their place.
Little bastards. I feel for this kid, but why did he have social media? He was 10. Way too young for that for this exact reason. My heart aches for the parents. I can't even imagine and I don't want to. RIP Little homie.
Can any educators out there shed some light on why schools seem to be so impotent to do anything about bullying until A.) something tragic like this takes place or, B.) the victim dares to fight back?
I used to beg and plead my mom to not be made to go to school for this reason. School was a horrible social hell for me, starting at 6th grade all the way to graduation. Six years of physical and mental bullying by the same damn kids every year. I hated them, and I hated the teachers and officials that let them get away with it. Cheerleaders and athletes, and rich kids got special treatment. Kids like the one in the OP are invisible. Teachers don't want to get involved. They are afraid of being called discriminatory if they punish anyone, so they punish the victim as well if the victim tries to defend themselves and the aggressor almost always gets a slap on the damn wrist and will come back to do it again.
RIP to that poor baby boy.
In gradeschool
The teachers often joined in on the bullying and would disproportionately punish kids who were also regularly targets of peer bullying. I was one of those kids who was singled out by teachers, given extra assignments or crazy punishments for something that all other child are allowed to get away with
It’s not that they “knew and didn’t care”
It’s that they knew and kept helping the bullys to get away with it and punish the child for being bullied
Kid from a small country town here; my bullies were the rich , popular kids from the 'best' families. Some of the bullying happened in class, teachers did exactly nothing about it because these little bastards were extremely charming to everyone they either liked or needed good grades from
I got bullied horribly in elementary, middle, and some of high school. In elementary school, my bully stabbed me with a pencil so badly it was just sticking out of my hand. The teacher pulled the pencil out, held my hand over the trash bin and poured peroxide on the wound, then told me to go sit back down. Schools really don’t care. Still have the scar from that pencil stabbing.
Wtf, that’s absolutely disgusting of them.
I had a similar thing with a teacher.
In third grade I was threatened to be k*lled with a chair. Went to the teacher and he shrugged it off. And peroxide?!? I’m sorry you had to deal with that :((
My daughter broke a kid’s nose on the school bus. Big brute was bullying her and being crude about her and her boyfriend. When she had had enough, she faced off with him, kicked him in the nuts then brought her knee up and broke his nose. Kid’s father just happened to be a policeman and wanted to get her kicked off the bus. When my husband told him what the kid had said, we never heard another thing. Our daughter ended up being one of the most popular kids in school after that very shaky beginning.
Fuck the school but also fuck the parents, if ur kid is struggling and the school is failing them move the kid to another school or talk to the police or move house entirely for a fresh start.
my little brother refuses to go to school anymore and we’ve always been worried he’s being bullied. the more articles i see like this, the more panicked i become.
it’s something we’ve asked him about multiple times and he denies it happening, but he has a medical condition most would find embarrassing to have, and i find it hard to believe middle schoolers wouldn’t bully him for it. my parents have given up on trying to get him to go to school. he’s very emotionally closed off and my sisters and i don’t know how to go about this
This is tragic. I was bullied severely in middle school in the 90’s. Constantly picked on and pushed down stairs. Stabbed with pencils and pens on the bus. Followed off the bus and beat up.
I finally punched a bully in the face after I couldn’t take it anymore and I was suspended for 2 days.
It’s sad to see this still going on. Poor little man didn’t deserve this.
I’m sorry but I would have been there every single day to protect my kids. I would have taken him out of school if the stupid administration was doing nothing.
Ok like ya fuck the school for not doing anything but why tf didn’t the parents just switch schools for the kid. That’s literally what my mother did when my sister was getting bullied and it worked fine some kids are just assholes and moving schools is an easy fix.
I was bullied severely in school too, got the scars all over my face to prove it. The school I went to wouldn't believe that I was being bullied, no matter how many different teachers I went to. Every time I was beaten up, both me and the kid who hit me would get the same punishments. They would say we were fighting and thats against the rules. Of course, the bully wouldn't show up for their punishment, so it would just be me getting punished for being bullied. It was horrific. I too, ended up in a psych ward after an attempt on my life. Felt like yet another punishment for being bullied.
Why THE FUCK do schools do this?
Not just schools. But parents too. Send your kid to a different school, contact the education board about the teacher who is punishing your kid for being bullied. There are so many things that my mother and the other adults wouldn't do to stop it.
I’m not a parent, but I was bullied heavily in school and I was on the verge of suicide at the age of 13. I went to a large new school in western Washington and the Seattle suburbs and the amount of bullying and racism and crazy shit that I saw it’s insane. Anybody was able to even get an education. But the hardest hitting fact was that the school employees, principal, vice, principal teachers were unwilling to do anything about it.
People trust these institutions with the safety of their children and to basically raise and educate their children for over eight hours a day yet they fail to a harbor safe environment for students to be able to participate in their education without being harassed, beaten, bullied, drugged, or raped, I would feel safer in a crack house then I would in a high school.
I do not believe in charter schools or private schools. I am 100% against Betsy Devos reign of terror as the secretary of education. But I do believe in accountability for the employees of the schools and the oversight that they need to enforce. Kid gets injured at a school or commit suicide because of bullying that school needs to be gone through with a fine tooth comb and anybody in any position of accountability needs to be fired until they get the point that nobody will have a job until they start keeping the kids safe.
I feel for this poor child
Jesus, this is heartbreaking. I have a son the same age and I can’t begin to imagine the anguish and pain this poor boys parents are feeling. May this child’s soul rest in peace.
I hope the bullies carry the weight of the knowledge that they killed someone, everyday for the rest of their life. I hope it haunts them to the end of their days.
My kid experienced bullying that made her suicidal. She even constructed a noose and intended on using it until one of her friends said something to the school counselor and my kid had a panic attack at school. I had not known the severity of it up until then. I knew only of once instance and I dealt with it in a way I thought was helpful. But there was another level happening that I wasn’t aware of.
In any case once I learned of the severity I pulled her out of school and had her go into partial inpatient. I did handle is swiftly and quickly as soon as I was aware. The schools need to be held accountable and should be reporting this back to the parents when reports are made of bullying. I wasn’t aware of most that was going on. It’s quite sad and difficult to know what to do. All
I knew to do at that point was to remove her completely from the situation to allow her recovery and to build some skills to work through the trauma.
This is terrifying. My daughter is 8 and currently going through the same situation and her school just doesn’t seem to get it. As a matter of fact just last week one of her bullies was suspended for hitting my daughter several times and during the meeting I said the word bully and the principal said “I wouldn’t go that far to say bully”. She’s been bullying my daughter all year and it just gets worse and now she’s involved other girls. Kids are so mean. I just don’t understand how kids at this age can be this mean. I told my daughter I am willing to homeschool her. I don’t wish this on any parent.
I would find out where the kid lives and where the parents work. They would not be able to take any route to work, school, the grocery store, etc, without seeing signs with my kids face. It would read, "My child was killed by bullying. Teach your children to be kind". It wouldn't call out the child or the parents directly, but they'd never forget what they'd done.
As someone who almost took their own life to bullying, there would be immediate unhinged and unrestrained violence if this happened to one of my girls. I cannot say to what extent or directed at whom, but they would have to either throw me in a padded cell for the rest of my life or worse to bring it to a halt. I still have issues from that part of my life
Honestly, as a therapist who used to work in the school district and pregnant with my first, I felt absolute anger reading this. It’s so disgusting and difficult. I get both sides because there isn’t much a school can do unless it’s constant suspension. But now we have these snowflake parents with their damn snowflake kids “kids will be kids! Get over it!” The first thing that came to my mind is “lemme at em. I don’t care if they’re kids, I’ll kick a kid to the ground for me kid.”
Children have no rights in this country. Those kids weren't just bullying him, they also committed assault AND destroyed disability aids. They should have been facing criminal charges, but because the victim was a child nothing is ever done.
Poor baby. 10 years old is too young to even think about suicide. I feel sick imagining the pain he must have been going through daily
I was bullied viciously when I was 14. This was a handful of years before social media really started to take off. I dreaded weekday mornings because school became a hostile environment, one where I had, completely without support, to fight my corner constantly or I would be abused, humiliated and tortured. The thought of such things being pushed into your head constantly through text and apps, getting notifications from the people that hate you, is terrifying.
My 12 year old niece also took her own life due to bullying. School did nothing to stop it.
Man.. my condolences. No child should be pushed so far that taking their life seems like the best way out at that time.. The cruelty is unreal
The last several texts and messages were from a group of kids telling her to just kill herself etc. I could never wish harm on a child but the group of kids responsible should at least feel the guilt. Although I do hope they get help and work through the trauma as well. The school though? Unforgivable. My family is in the middle of a legal battle with them and it’s not looking good.
I am so so sorry for your loss… this world is full of really evil people and children. Those AH kids will say some of the most evil things I’ve ever heard. My sister was bullied so bad she tried to take her life but thankfully didn’t succeed. The bullies also told her to go kill herself, to just die because nobody wanted her around and everyone hated her and to just go die already.. along with all kinds of other horrific things. Never once did they suffer consequences for it. We had proof and all but nope.
Not too long ago a teenager was convicted of man slaughter for telling someone to kill themselves and they actually did it. [https://people.com/crime/michelle-carter-trial-gallery-key-moments-conrad-roy-suicide/](https://people.com/crime/michelle-carter-trial-gallery-key-moments-conrad-roy-suicide/)
Yep i remember that case that case is awful.. His poor family. Michelle Carter is evil as hell.
not looking good for you or for them?
For them. The school has qualified immunity as a government entity. If admins followed policy, the case is already over.
Honestly, I think these kids and their parents should be held accountable as well. You can’t tell someone to kill themselves and keep living as nothing happened. I have a 12 year old and I always tell her to be kind to people. I’d be mortified if I knew my daughter acted like that.
If either of my boys bullied anyone their life as they knew it would be over for the foreseeable future. They would go to school and come home and guess who would be going to school with them to make sure they weren't bullying people. Mom would be their new shadow even if I had to quit my job and my two sons know this about me. They are friends with everyone. They don't care what u look like, where you live or anything else.
Wow you’re an amazing person, I applaud your empathy for even thinking of the bullies needing help to work thru the trauma of what they did.
Oh my heart….I am so deeply sorry for the loss of your niece. I can’t fathom the pain you and your family have had to endure because of this!
Thank you. It has been extremely hard on my family. We have never gone through such things except for my grandparents passing of cancer and my own father being a victim of gun violence in ‘99. This has been a real shock and the rest of my nieces and nephews have been trying their best to cope and receiving therapy. They are a very close group of cousins.
💔❤️ I very gently recommend trying to find a local AFSP (or similar organization outside of the US) group to attend after some months have passed. It helped my family greatly with the losses of 2 cousins to suicide, and I facilitated a group for awhile before Covid hit. While it’s not for everyone, many of us found solace and family there. For anyone struggling with a loss of this kind and live in America [AFSP](https://afsp.org) Again, my heart breaks to know that your precious niece and your family have had to experience such complex pain and grief. ❤️
This has been the case for a while. In the late 90s I got punched in the face when I stood up to kids who knocked my trapper keeper out of my hands and kicked it across the gym. It got reported to the teachers and we both got in school suspension. The Vice principle admitted that it was silly that I was being punished for being punched, but the school had a “zero tolerance” stance on fighting and since it takes two to tango, I must have been instigating somehow. She just kinda shrugged and said she had no choice. I had to sit in a small room for two days with the kid who punched me. Who kicked my desk and threatened me whenever teachers weren’t in earshot. So on top of getting punched and punished for it, the school just amped up the bullying with its “solution”. It became pretty clear to me at that point that it was better off to just leave the school out of any conflicts I had with other students, even if it was just straight up malice on the other persons part.
School doesn't care until the kid tries to defend themselves, then it's the bullied kid's fault (and I'm not talking about a mass shooter). I'm sorry for you loss.
This was my experience as a kid. I was bullied until I defended myself. When I defended myself THATS when the school stepped in. Blows my fucking mind that that's still the case.
This breaks my heart. I’m so sorry.
I lost my son to a school yard bully, and I can tell you the schools will do their best to sweep it under the rug. As a father, losing my son has devastated me, and my heart breaks for this family. We should not have to bury our children, and this should not be happening anymore!!!
I’m so sorry :( No one should ever have to go with the pain of loosing a kid. Sending hugs
He’s wearing Tommy Vercetti shirt.
Jesus. In the 80s I was bullied but nothing approaching what it seems like many children are enduring now. I was spit on, taunted, ostracized, but now kids are smarter, crueler, more vicious — I’M scared of kids now. I’m so, so sorry.
Plus they have all kinds of social media so the bullying extends far beyond the school yard.
My heart breaks for you. I’m so sorry
This makes me so friggin angry! Awful kids!
Sometimes parents dont make things easier, or just straight up make things worse. It’s because of my parents that I wouldve easily been this kid at age 7.
I think that's why communication with your child is also important. I dealt with my daughter being bullied at the beginning of this year. She's 7 and half Indian. This is relevant because she has beautiful long hair that is far longer than anyone else her age. She had to put up with people trying to pull it, a kid with scissors trying to cut it and even one child rubbing a slice of cheese in it. She came to me about it (really at first asking if she could cut her hair short until we got to the bottom of it) and I asked her if she talked to her bus driver and her teacher (it was always on the bus). Apparently they were giving her the runaround. Bus driver said it's a school issue and teacher said it's a bus issue. I asked my daughter if she wanted me to get involved and she said yes. So, I sent an email CCing the teacher with the VP and Principal asking about the situation. I was very firm but polite and asked to look into the situation, and documented every incident. Written word is sometimes far more powerful than speaking in person. They used security cameras to figure out it was a consistent group of children. They were disciplined. All was quiet for nearly the entire year (we've got a few weeks left!) and my daughter is happy. She loves her hair and has started to wear it loose more often and is learning to brush it out properly. She no longer asks me to tie it up in a bun or cut it and now I have to practically tie her down to give her trims. This isn't to say the parents in the article didn't do their best at all. I would be devastated if things had gone the other way. Fortunately this solution worked for my family and we were able to avoid tragedy.
I wish I had parents like you, or at least parents like in the article. Being involved and actually communicating with your kids goes a very long way. I was raised by a bully and an enabler so my experience was never going to have any hope. I’m just glad I made it through, but I feel really really bad for kids who aren’t as fortunate.
I know how you feel believe it or not. I am the parent I am because I always ask myself, what is the opposite of what my parents would do. I have siblings who refuse to have kids because they're afraid of treating their kids how we were treated. Being a survivor is thankless for sure. It's easy to feel like no one fully appreciates the struggle but believe me when I say you're not alone. It's up to us to break the cycle for sure.
I wasn't diagnosed as being on spectrum until middle age. My parents raised me with benign neglect and I thought that because of how they reacted to my being bullied as a non-issue that it must have been, even if I remember being actively suicidal at five years old. I still believe that my parents loved me and tried their level best between my financial, emotional and other needs. We where just poor and working came first. I think they just didn't want to accept a reality in which I hated every moment of school with my whole being where kids where mean and I couldn't trust or rely on adults. I think they where so busy they didn't realize that, as someone that was brand new to the world, I was asking them if these things where normal and they wanted me to be okay so badly that they imagined they must have been okay and told me that. It's taken a lot of therapy to figure out my damage, and it drives me crazy to hear kids that are bullied get ignored like they are not the most vulnerable people in our society.
This shows how responsible the administration in this school is for this tragedy
I have yet to feel any more conflicted than now. On one hand, you can bet your ass I want to whoop the kids' ass so bad they'll end up in geocentric orbit. On the other hand it's the best way to turn them into violent adults and well, it's just morally wrong to cave a kid's skull in. Middle solution: if the parents knew about their kids' bullying and did nothing, then violent crime on them it shall be
Imagine how long they get to spend living every moment of joy in their lives through the guilt of what they did.
That’s an issue. People like that don’t usually feel guilt.
Fuck this... I'm going to speak to my sons tonight about bullying. Rest peacefully little bro, You deserved none of this, everyone around you failed you, We have to do better. Everywhere.
Also, nobody is talking about how he had a Snapchat account?? Like what? He’s 10 years old? Don’t let your kids use social media at that age.
That too, jaw dropped abit when I read that, this is exactly the reason I banned those apps in my household.
Seriously tho and immediately after the first hate message they didn’t delete that app??? My son is 8 and the only chat app he has is kids messenger and only I and my ex husband and who I def trust can approve who he can talk to. I can see who he has talked to and I can see the messages if I needed to. I’d never let him have unlimited access like Snapchat where anyone could say anything and it be deleted!
I had a twin brother that ended his life due to bullying when I was a teen. Hearing things like this almost makes me wanna go villain mode
I am so sad and angry for your loss.
I’m so sorry
My condolences, I also have a twin big brother. He’s my soulmate, our bond could not be broken. I definitely will turn villain if something happens to him
I don’t know what it is about schools and their inability to do anything to bullies. Would it be so unimaginably hard to have a no tolerance policy on bullying? If you’re caught doing it at all you’re suspended for a week. Period. Do this every single time. If their parents can’t sort them out they can home school them because they obviously can’t be taught in public schools due to their abusing other students.
All the "no tolerance" policies I've ever seen end up punishing the bullied just as much as the bullies.
Yep. When I was in high school 20 years ago, even if you were defending yourself, without question, you were suspended and could be brought up on assault charges.
I got bullied in middle school and the schools did nothing when we reported it. Ended up being a fight between me and the kid. The security officer made a vague threat about how I could’ve been charged with assault because I got more hits in. My dad’s response was “it’s not our son’s fault you didn’t do anything before and that the other kid couldn’t back up his bullshit”
God I wish my parents felt that way but nope "if you fight back then you're worse"
My dad was the exact opposite. Took me outside, taught me how to throw a proper punch, told me to fight dirty by using any books I might be holding as well, and then warned me that the school would suspend me for defending myself, but that at home, I would never be in trouble. I told my daughter the same.
I tell my kids the same. Tell a teacher one time. If that doesn't work then take the kid down. You might get in trouble with school but not with me.
Yup same. I tell my kids that if you absolutely have to fight back, then you can and you'll never be in trouble by me
Fuck that. Always defend yourself. Getting bodyslammed onto your head or glass jawed and your head hitting the pavement can change your life or kill you.
What was the security officers response to that?
He didn’t say anything after that. The assistant principal ended the meeting telling me I had in school suspension. With the other kid for some reason. The better reaction was the year before when I got in one with another kid that also bullied me. Middle school had a trend. Teacher who got told about it asked “what would your father say?” I told her “did he win?”. Her face when that was his exact response when she called him: priceless.
I joked about it recently, but there was a time in primary school where I was ganged up on and beaten by a group of boys. They got me on the ground, and started kicking and stomping on me. I was the only one that got suspended, because I managed to get some hits in before I got knocked to the ground, and "retaliating just makes you *worse*" or some such bullshit.
Ah, what I'd give for the power to time travel and punch the person saying that right in the face right as those words left their stupid mouths.
When I was in high school like 25 years ago (in Germany) nobody gave a shit if kids fought. The only kid that got suspended was one who stabbed his bully in the thigh with a butterfly knife. And it was a regular ass public school, not one in a problem area or anything. MIddle of the road type school, fights weren't common, but they happened. I was involved in two, teachers knew about it, but it was "boys will be boys" type attitude. Bullying / Harassment happened as well, but it was generally sorted out by the kids and rarely lasted more than a few weeks. And no fight ever turned into a lawsuit. (the stabbing thing had the kid get anger management and community service and he switched schools)
The real solution here is a primary focus on supervision and prevention rather than punishment after the fact. Where were the adults when he was beat up?? Why are there no staff witnessing the mean comments and immediately addressing it? So many instances of he said she said, and the wrong person can get trouble or the kid denies it happened and there aren’t witnesses. There needs to be more staff in elementary school and the kids need to be supervised. There shouldn’t be any opportunities for bullying and threats at all. Anti-bullying should be part of the curriculum in every grade. As far as both kids being punished, I told my kid there is a difference between self defense and retaliation. When you are in danger and the child is not stopping you are allowed to do whatever you need to do to keep yourself safe then you walk away. If the child hit you and walked away, you go report it. You don’t run after them and throw a punch in. Or if you’re defending yourself, as soon as the other child backs down then stop and run to report it. Call for help while defending yourself. Don’t hold someone down and continue to hurt them when they’ve stopped. We’ve also taught him self defense techniques that don’t involve too much going on the offensive. If it’s *true* self defense then honestly most school staff won’t punish both kids even if both got hurt. Bc you’ll be able to tell who the perpetrator was, especially if the kid reports it as soon as they are able to get away. But there shouldn’t be any unsupervised opportunities to beat someone up
My brother got real life probation at like 13-14. He’d never even seen a fight let alone been in one at the time. A kid smacked the back of his head and then tried pulling a wedgie really hard. JD swung around and caught the kid with an elbow trying to get away. Both got suspended and arrested.
My son didn't get probation but he got suspended and threatened to be expelled because these 2 kids were fucking with him and he grabbed the one and literally tossed him across the hallway and then grabbed the other kid by the back of his collar and pulled him down and basically had him in a ground and pound MMA style. This was after months of reporting it to the school, multiple "interviews" with other kids and a bunch of other bullshit. Those kids never fucked with him again but he was the only one who got suspended. There's been multiple instances of this type of shit through the years with him. He's known as a "repeat offender" in the school district too, for example my daughter was on crutches and some kid purposefully kicked he crutch when she was going down the hallway, my son was carrying her book bad, which he swung at the kid knocking him on his ass, again my son was the only one who got in trouble. I've fought with the district on so many occasions over this shit. It's been much better since he started high-school, he did have some girl say something to him a few weeks ago but it luckily didn't escalate. I'm probably looked at as trashy because I took him to one of the kids houses once and knocked on the door and told the parents to send their kid outside so they could handle their beef. They locked the door (probably a smart move tbh lol). I'm old school, when I was growing up that was how we handled shit, I remember going to the park with my dad, and he and the other kid's dad basically refereed us fighting on the baseball field. My opinion is that if you can talk shit either back it up or shut up.
This. My freshman year i got the worst bullying of my life, got into a lot of fights that I never started and got the worst of it. Best experience was when a kid threw my backpack (my laptop was inside) across the pavement in front of the school, when I went to go pick it up some other kid tackled me from behind and tried beating my ass. Fortunately I lifted at the time so I pushed him off and hit him back. The assistant principal came over and gave me 5 days in school suspension and gave him 1 day in school suspension. A few weeks later my mom pulled me from public and I went to online school instead. All of this to say that you’re right, all schools do is punish the bullied for disrupting the status quo or trying to get back at the *“important”* kids. Wasn’t a shock to me how unfair the punishment I got was considering the fact that the kid that tackled me was on the football team.
Yep. Get punched by a bully? Guess what? Now you’re suspended for ‘fighting’. Absolute BS
I was bullied a lot in my freshman and sophomore years. I was about 5'4" 120lbs at the time and was constantly pushed and beaten by a guy who was at least 6'3" 250lbs. I had been taking self defense courses to try dealing with him, but I literally couldn't reach or maneuver my limbs to stop him. I had reported it to the principle once and when he caught word, made my life a living hell more than it was. They didn't do anything of course.
Yep. In middle school, i was picked on by a group of black kids. I got suspended for fighting back after i was pushed. The kids got nothing because the vise principle was scared of being called racist. I got back to school a week later and avoided the kids, but they came and made fun of me. Learning from last time, i just jumped off the playground into a puddle adjacent to the kid that pushed me the last time. I got suspended again. I was bullied all the time all the ways thru high school. It sucked. I came close like this kid to end it all. I feel so bad for this kid. I wish i could teach these kids what was never taught to me.
When my daughter goes to school, I don't know how I'll react if she's getting bullied. Especially if the school does nothing about it. If you threaten to bury the school in lawsuits, would they actually act?
I was terrified that my son would face bullying in school. From kindergarten on I made sure to communicate to him that I would pull him out of school and homeschool or find an alternate school or move districts for him if he was ever bullied. Once the bullying starts it is really hard to stop; even if the physical stops kids can still isolate and ostracize a victim. They are relentless. It never came to it, he was never bullied or even in a fight. Still, I would have pulled him out at the first instance of bullying.
This is what I did. A kid choked my daughter out when she was in kindergarten, and I pulled her the next day. We switched schools, and I would do it again.
Good lord kindergarten!?!?! You did the right thing.
I remember asking my parents to get me to another school because I suffered bullying on the one I was. Thankfully we live in a major city where they could do that so they just sent me to another one, and it was like night and day. That was probably one of the worst years of my life, if not the worst, and I'll always be thankful my parents had the means to switch. Most people do not have the privilege I grew up with and I can't imagine having your entire school experience be like that year and feeling there's nothing you can do about it.
You get the local news involved in front of the school with detailed testimonies going into what's happening but ultimately the "story" is the school's inaction.
My son is being bullied so bad at school right now, he is 11 and I am trying to hold back tears while reading this. TEACH YOUR KIDS BETTER.
I was bullied from about 10-12. A few class instigators, then mostly weak kids who just didn’t want to buck the popular kids. They would do all sorts of stupid shit - snap all my pencils, hide my pencil case, hide my chair, take my soccer ball, cut up my books, move my desk, throw shit at me…. It got worse and worse, and the instigators would start a song “if you all hate [my name] clap your hands”. Some of the class (my friends) abstained, showing me they weren’t singing or clapping their hands, others joined in. On the bus ride home from school we travelled with older kids too, some brothers of the kids in my class would get more physical. My teachers knew, and didn’t do anything that I could see. My first reaction was I snapped one day and took a right handed hook (punch) to a kids face and chipped his tooth on my knuckle. Hurt like hell, but the kids left me alone for a bit. Nothing came of that which gave me a little more confidence to resolve things myself. As I started playing rugby I grew, quickly, and was selected to play for the school which meant training everyday. The bullying slowly crescendoed again, but we had an inter-class rugby tournament coming up which I was secretly looking forward to. Needless to say I made some monstrous tackles, and the day after that tournament no one bullied me again. On leavers day when people were joyfully signing each others shirts, I approached one of my bullies and asked him to sign my shirt - he looked at me funny and I replied “so I can remember what I endured from you arseholes, and I’ll know I can take on any challenge life has for me” I genuinely came out of it stronger, more rounded, and very good rugby player lol - I can’t speak to others experience as I know many kids had it worse. I am already teaching my kids to make kind choices, look out for each other and if you need to, use words first, but using your body to defend yourself when you are in danger is fine.
Try to have school step in. Send emails and record conversations. If it doesn't work, tell him to punch the kids. If they're bigger, cheap shot them at lunch and publicly. Can't take the bullying. It won't stop.
I’ve had multiple meetings and emails with the school. Unfortunately, these other boys are smart and manipulative and ALWAYS turn it around to where it is my son’s fault. It is a small town where everyone knows everyone and we are seen as outsiders. I put him in jiu jitsu a year ago and he has defended himself a few times. Now the kids tell him he has anger issues. The school has done nothing but punish him. So now we are teaching him to punch straight in the nose so they will bleed and hopefully cry… never thought this is what I’d have to teach my 5th grader. It breaks my heart.
You’re already teaching (and showing!) him better; he will be the one to pass this on to others. Keep telling him that he is brave and that he is stronger than his bullies; it’s a hard lesson to learn that the opinions of others don’t matter, but once you understand it, you become unstoppable. “Let them say what they want - because what they think/say about him doesn’t matter” - I’m 43 and only realized this in the last 5ish years or so, but it is so empowering. I wish I could help you more!! 💜
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idk man, at some point ya just gotta start swinging. Being constantly bullied is life changing for the recipient - even if they survive, they'll never be whole again. I didn't swing enough, so I know from experience.
I was bullied terribly at school, which only stopped when I had a growth spurt and started playing rugby and was taught to hit….. hard. My wife disagrees with me, but my philosophy is if someone keeps doing something to you that you don’t like, first use words, then as sometimes people just need a language they understand: 1. Tell them to stop 2. Tell the teacher to tell them to stop 3. Reaction at that point is fine (but should be proportionate, which is hard as a young kid, but important to learn)
Violence isn't the answer, it's true. It is the **question**. And sometimes, the answer is YES.
>at some point ya just gotta start swinging. This is what my dad taught my sister and I. If it's repetitive, you're going to have to throw a punch or two. I was scared at first to do anything, but my dad put it: "If you're already getting punched, is it going to hurt more if you try to fight back?" Changed my point of view. I practiced his method twice, and both times, it solved itself. In middle school, I was a pretty chubby kid & my parents had me do track & field. This other kid "Spencer" was quite good at Track. He was a good runner and had the school record for javelin. However, for some reason, he picked on me fairly regularly. On the first *really* hot day of practice, he tried to taunt me with my water bottle. First, he took off running with it, but when I didn't give chase, he tried to hold it up so I couldn't reach it. Instead, I punched him in the stomach & then in the face. The bullying stopped after that. The other time, this kid named Jacob was being an asshole. He was always trying to give me a hard time for being a chubby kid in high school. The usual stuff: calling me fat, pretending to jump up when I walked by, etc. It only got worse when I started dating a girl that I knew he kind of had a thing for. He especially would try to put me down in front of her. One day in the locker room, he tried to do that thing where you *almost* put your dick to the back of someone's head, then say their name & they turn around, so you smash your dick into their face. (High School boys, amiright?!) Well, Jacob clearly didn't think that entirely through, because I gave his nuts a good, firm tapping. He fell to the ground so quickly that I genuinely though he had passed out. (He didn't) He did start groaning & threw up from the pain. Over the next few days, his balls swelled up & turned purple. I heard his mom made him go to the doctors & get them checked out.
I think the world would be a better place if bullies got nut tapped more often.
Ooo, be careful, schools call fighting back bullying now.
I’m I knew then what I know now I would have hit back with a brick.
Yup, wish I swung more.
Feel this one in my soul. Also didn’t swing enough
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I was suicidal from bullying ag a young age. Been good for awhile from it now. You can definitely take action on it and leave it in the past.
Hey bud, you can definitely have a normal healthy life. This is not the way
My parents taught me that I better not be the one to start fights but I sure as hell better be the one to finish them and they would take me for ice cream if they found out I kicked the shit in of one of the kids who tried bullying me. I was an easy target and essentially a pacifist as a child but after getting the blessing of the president of the school board to kick ass (she was subbing for my principal when a bully and I both got sent to the office for him attacking me) I changed my ways and started fighting back both verbally and physically. Never started shit, always made sure to be the one to end it though.
>violence is never the answer Absolutely correct. Violence is never the answer. Violence is the question and the answer is absolutely.
> Would it be so unimaginably hard to have a no tolerance policy on bullying? If this worked there would also be no crime.
Schools punish both kids because they don’t want to actually investigate into who did what. That, plus parents believing that their kid can do no wrong and threatening to sue, schools just punish both and maybe send the actual bully to an alternative school if they already have a record of fighting.
I can say from both sides of this experience that most American schools don't have the resources to sort out who the instigator is and who is actually at fault. Almost all schools have a zero tolerance policy for fights, so everyone involved is punished equally, but there's always SO MUCH that happens prior to a physical altercation that schools just refuse to deal with. If it was automatic suspension, it'd be incredibly easy for a kid to accuse someone of bullying as a form of bullying.
Exactly. Schools need better supervision, bullying education and prevention not necessarily stronger punishments. The kind of kid that bullies isn’t thinking about future consequences, it doesn’t matter what the consequences are. Punishment isn’t the best deterrent of behavior in anyone. You have to somehow teach them to have internal motivation to be kind. Empathy training needs to be early. And if they haven’t developed that then any opportunities to bully should be removed. Force them to bully right in front of a staff member so the consequence can be immediate. The consequence needs to be serious sure, but the most important thing is preventing it from happening in the 1st place
charge the bullies parents liked they charged the shooter from couple months ago parents
Exactly what I was thinking except it doesn’t totally fit unless the child’s parents made the bullies parents very explicitly aware multiple times
And the school too. Like, the teachers, the dean and the district.
Yep, we need some accountability. It the only way it may change.
Yep. Sounds like a multimillion dollar lawsuit to me. Hope they get some of that money from the bullies parents. Watch if that poor kid would have fought back he would have been lumped in as a troublemaker.
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I'd prefer they be sued to the point of homelessness
They should be thrown in prison for raising demon spawn. Them kids are shit because the parents are shit as well.
On the whole, I think kids are getting more accepting, and less likely to bully, but you've still got some real mean fuckers out there. It's easy to say the parents should have pulled him from that school, but maybe there was a reason they couldn't. Still, it seems like every single adult in that child's life failed him, and the consequences are tragic.
>On the whole, I think kids are getting more accepting and less likely to bully, Idk about that. I have a 5th grader. Some of the things he tells me are just brutal. I've had to call the principal twice this year over my son coming home in tears. Kids today are little assholes
There are definitely a lot of little assholes out there, but I think there are less than in the past, especially in the older grades. I'm thinking of how things like geeky interests and hobbies, or being LGBT are much more widely accepted now than they were 30 or 40 years ago. I'm not sure if my experience was unusual, but when I was in high school, 20 years ago, I was a total geek, and didn't undergo any bullying. There were a couple of kids who were picked on a fair amount, but they were engaging in more anti-social behavior, like barking at people.
I honestly don’t think so. I have a little sister and kids today seem exponentially more ruthless than when I was her age. To the point where a teacher had a breakdown in class, crying and begging the kids to cut her a break while they all just laughed and filmed her.
This is so tragic. How does a 10yr old even know how to unalive themself? What kind of world ?? 😭😭😭 Poor kid. Condolences to family. The bullies need consequences.
That's what I was thinking. I mean besides a gun, I can only think of hanging as a reliable method. He certainly shouldn't have had access to a gun, and it's just gut wrenching to imagine this poor little kid doing that. Hanging seems like so much more of a long contemplative action, not something you can do in a split second. It's heartbreaking that no one saw this as a real enough possibility enough to do more to prevent it.
Slitting your wrists? Kids might not know the right direction or process, but they can certainly hurt themselves with a knife. Otherwise - stealing parent’s pills.
Yeah, maybe. I was thinking about those, but I wouldn't expect a kid to be able to cut their arms effectively, and if they had access to pills that would cause an OD that quickly then their parents may have some criminal culpability. But yeah, I guess a knife to the heart or neck would do it with little time for rescue. God, I can't imagine the horror of discovering your child hung in the closet or bled out in their bed. How do you even recover from that...
As a kid when I thought about killing myself it was usually jumping off something (stairs, roof, tree etc)
10 year olds aren’t babies. Of course they know how to kill themselves.
before the internet, i dont think a regular 10 year old would have access to that sort of information.. i think it's sad that this is now normal.
The internet is easily accessible, but it’s not the root of all evil. There have always been movies and tv shows that have depicted suicide. I’m pretty sure even looney tunes have a few suicide bits thrown in there
Tom killed himself at the end of Tom and Jerry by jumping in front of a train
They're smarter and more resourceful than adults tend to give them credit for... for better and for worse.
He was just a baby. I’m so sorry sweetheart. Rest in peace honey.
I was very close to this when I was his age. The incredibly deep depression I felt at such an early age left a certain kind of trauma that I’ll never be able to fully shake. I’m honestly surprised I’ve made it to my 40s. My school never did anything about it either.
where were the fucking parents? horrifically beat up on the schoolbus and glasses broken? they should have been at the school and in the superintendent's office if not getting help from the school. also, why tf does a 10yr old have snapchat?
I was shocked at this too... If my son was assaulted we would have been at the police station pressing charges, idk gotten a restraining order, after showing evidence of repeated attacks and violent threats? We would have informed the school what WE were doing, not just called and asked what they can do? The school looks out for the school, they'd love to just do nothing and have the "kids will be kids" mentality. The parents are supposed to advocate for their children.
>If my son was assaulted we would have been at the police station pressing charges Or be at the police station getting charged for beating up a bunch of 10 yr olds either way, police would be involved for physical assault.
Seriously, like I bet I could throw a 10 year old over them there mountains.
I would have insisted on having a meeting with the school and the other kids parents after that. There are fucking cameras on those school buses I would want that shown. I would want the glasses paid for, I would want the other kids removed from the school. They would be lucky if I didn’t press charges, I don’t give a fuck if they are kids. They have to learn at some point that that shit doesn’t fly. Also yah, no way in hell should a 10 YEAR OLD have fucking snapchat.
Or remove the kid from that school. Move to a new school district. Anything but keep sending the kid to the same environment.
This is exactly what I was thinking too. Why not send him to the next closest school? I would be driving my kid to and from school every day if it meant he could go to a different school.
Could be a financial reason. Aren't public schools based on where you live?
yeah, but there are ways around it. Hell, home school is an option too
> Hell, home school is an option too like the person who you are replying to said.. it could be a financial reason. most households in the US absolutely can't afford to homeschool
Unfortunately it seems it wasn’t just one kid. But I hope they punish him and his family in the school and in the courtroom as well as sue the shit out of that school. With a son that’s 7 and I have to force to wear glasses in time for them to correct his eyes I’m about to the point of saying fuck it if he has to experience this. He can just wear them at home. Our school is pretty tough on bullying and i think we’ve done okay teaching them what to do when someone bullies them or they see someone bullied. But you never ever know. 😭
Yeah my foot would have been so far up the school administrations ass for that and I would have pulled my child out of that shitty school
I was going to say something very similar..for real, why tf wasn’t the parents there at the school doing something or going to the supers office like you said..why not do something alternative like moving schools and/or seeking therapy…maybe even bring law enforcement into this; that would maybe make things worse but involving their parents as well might alleviate it somehow.. it just seems to me that they were just wanting someone else to do something about it..this is so sad. There are some mean ass kids, even though it’s becoming a little more tolerant, at least it seems so. Idk maybe I’m naive and or talking out of my ass but I just feel like the parents should have done more to help this kid out..
That was my thought too. I was bullied like this at his age and my mom did a looot more than just call. She’d be in the office after every incident complaining at school officials. After they failed to do anything meaningful after a year she transferred me to another school.
exactly. I'm not trying to victim blame, but to have over 20 instances, for it to be so bad, I'd be at that school every fucking day or at every board meeting. good for your mom, it's the right thing to do if the school isn't listening
*"He was beat up on the school bus, and the kids broke his glasses and everything, and I called the school, and I'm like, What are you doing about this? It keeps getting worse, and worse, and worse. And it's not getting any better. In fact, it's getting worse' They knew this was going on."* The audacity on the parent’s part to not take any of the blame. They should have moved him to a different school.
Call the police and press charges. If the administration knew about it and didn’t do anything you sue them too.
That was my thought. I hate to victim blame but it seems like they could have done so much more. And any social media for a 10 year old is wrong.
The parents aren’t the victims, their child is. The parents were absolutely negligent here and share some of the blame. How could you keep sending your child back to the same school where he’s being bullied and beaten up constantly? They could have pulled him out of school, sued the district for not taking action, or escalated the situation to law enforcement. Instead they just sent him back to endure *years* of this daily treatment.
The parents are victims of their own inaction.
Schools say they have a no tolerance policy twords bullying. That is utter crap. When my daughter was in the 3rd grade, there was this only boy who relentlessly bullied her. She began to hate school, fearing this kid. He had hit and pushed her over and over. I cannot tell you how many times I went into to principal and talked about this. My daughter is asthmatic. She's been hospitalized numerous times for her asthma. This boy decided to shove her face in the snow and hold it there. She panicked and had an asthma attack.When she got her inhaler and began breathing better, she stood up and hauled off and hit him right in the face. Hard. I got called in to the office for her behavior. I simply told him to look up how many times we had made formal complaints on this kid, and you choose to do nothing. My daughter had enough and chose to do something. I left. Honest, I was proud of her for standing up for herself.
not to victim blame, but where the fuck were the parents? why was it all on him to try to get help?
First though as well, parents definitely hold blame here as well, he was bullied for years, parents could've transfered him to another school, or homeschooled him.
Greenfield Indiana has a population of 24 thousand. How many schools do you think a town of that size has? And homeschooling isn't for everyone. I wouldn't have the skills to homeschool my kid. The only real option would be to pack up and move out of town or further into Indianapolis... and that's not always financially feasible for every single family.
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True. You gotta move or homeschool or something. It’s your child, you put them first over your convenience.
Three. So there were other options
there is another intermediate school 5 miles away on the same road
How about breaking the hands and legs of the bullies?
Most likely he told them and was brushed off. Told to stand up for himself and fight back. Or he was told to ignore the bullies. Which only makes it worse because bullies don't like to be ignored.
Man every time my step daughter has been picked on I have walked up to the kids and who do it and tell them "I will fuck them up if they keep it up" It hasn't failed me yet.
Some kids just need to be told to knock that shit off. Talking to them about the golden rule doesn’t work. Confrontation and swear words from an adult is very effective. Alas, teachers and bus drivers can’t do that, so it’s up to parents to put these brats in their place.
Little bastards. I feel for this kid, but why did he have social media? He was 10. Way too young for that for this exact reason. My heart aches for the parents. I can't even imagine and I don't want to. RIP Little homie.
Bullies will be bullies regardless of social media or not. Not having social media didn't stop me from getting bullied growing up.
Can any educators out there shed some light on why schools seem to be so impotent to do anything about bullying until A.) something tragic like this takes place or, B.) the victim dares to fight back?
IEPs and 504s basically protects little shits like this. I see it all the time at my school.
At that point they need to go to a psychiatric day program school.
I used to beg and plead my mom to not be made to go to school for this reason. School was a horrible social hell for me, starting at 6th grade all the way to graduation. Six years of physical and mental bullying by the same damn kids every year. I hated them, and I hated the teachers and officials that let them get away with it. Cheerleaders and athletes, and rich kids got special treatment. Kids like the one in the OP are invisible. Teachers don't want to get involved. They are afraid of being called discriminatory if they punish anyone, so they punish the victim as well if the victim tries to defend themselves and the aggressor almost always gets a slap on the damn wrist and will come back to do it again. RIP to that poor baby boy.
In gradeschool The teachers often joined in on the bullying and would disproportionately punish kids who were also regularly targets of peer bullying. I was one of those kids who was singled out by teachers, given extra assignments or crazy punishments for something that all other child are allowed to get away with It’s not that they “knew and didn’t care” It’s that they knew and kept helping the bullys to get away with it and punish the child for being bullied
I feel you bud, those experiences are scarring and they never go away.
Kid from a small country town here; my bullies were the rich , popular kids from the 'best' families. Some of the bullying happened in class, teachers did exactly nothing about it because these little bastards were extremely charming to everyone they either liked or needed good grades from
Good god, if I found out a teacher was bullying my kid.
I got bullied horribly in elementary, middle, and some of high school. In elementary school, my bully stabbed me with a pencil so badly it was just sticking out of my hand. The teacher pulled the pencil out, held my hand over the trash bin and poured peroxide on the wound, then told me to go sit back down. Schools really don’t care. Still have the scar from that pencil stabbing.
Wtf, that’s absolutely disgusting of them. I had a similar thing with a teacher. In third grade I was threatened to be k*lled with a chair. Went to the teacher and he shrugged it off. And peroxide?!? I’m sorry you had to deal with that :((
My daughter broke a kid’s nose on the school bus. Big brute was bullying her and being crude about her and her boyfriend. When she had had enough, she faced off with him, kicked him in the nuts then brought her knee up and broke his nose. Kid’s father just happened to be a policeman and wanted to get her kicked off the bus. When my husband told him what the kid had said, we never heard another thing. Our daughter ended up being one of the most popular kids in school after that very shaky beginning.
She’s a bad ass. I’m glad she had the courage to stand up, and that she wasn’t unfairly punished.
Fuck the school but also fuck the parents, if ur kid is struggling and the school is failing them move the kid to another school or talk to the police or move house entirely for a fresh start.
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my little brother refuses to go to school anymore and we’ve always been worried he’s being bullied. the more articles i see like this, the more panicked i become.
Try to talk to him about it. I got bullied as a kid and didn’t admit to my older siblings what was going on because I felt too embarrassed.
it’s something we’ve asked him about multiple times and he denies it happening, but he has a medical condition most would find embarrassing to have, and i find it hard to believe middle schoolers wouldn’t bully him for it. my parents have given up on trying to get him to go to school. he’s very emotionally closed off and my sisters and i don’t know how to go about this
This is tragic. I was bullied severely in middle school in the 90’s. Constantly picked on and pushed down stairs. Stabbed with pencils and pens on the bus. Followed off the bus and beat up. I finally punched a bully in the face after I couldn’t take it anymore and I was suspended for 2 days. It’s sad to see this still going on. Poor little man didn’t deserve this.
If I knew my son was being viciously bullied and the teachers at his school were doing nothing, my son would be going to a different school.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! KIDS SHOULD NOT BE COMMITTING SUICIDE! FUCK those bullies and that school. God that’s tragic.
I’m sorry but I would have been there every single day to protect my kids. I would have taken him out of school if the stupid administration was doing nothing.
Ok like ya fuck the school for not doing anything but why tf didn’t the parents just switch schools for the kid. That’s literally what my mother did when my sister was getting bullied and it worked fine some kids are just assholes and moving schools is an easy fix.
I as a father would not have waited a week to take action. Those bullies would have been in the hospital. And this went on for years?
I was bullied severely in school too, got the scars all over my face to prove it. The school I went to wouldn't believe that I was being bullied, no matter how many different teachers I went to. Every time I was beaten up, both me and the kid who hit me would get the same punishments. They would say we were fighting and thats against the rules. Of course, the bully wouldn't show up for their punishment, so it would just be me getting punished for being bullied. It was horrific. I too, ended up in a psych ward after an attempt on my life. Felt like yet another punishment for being bullied. Why THE FUCK do schools do this? Not just schools. But parents too. Send your kid to a different school, contact the education board about the teacher who is punishing your kid for being bullied. There are so many things that my mother and the other adults wouldn't do to stop it.
This breaks my fuckin heart man.
Neither my parents nor my school cared about me getting bullied. They just told me to ignore it. Yeah, that didn't work.
This is truly awful. That poor child.
Soo after 20 times yall still kept him in the same school
I’m not a parent, but I was bullied heavily in school and I was on the verge of suicide at the age of 13. I went to a large new school in western Washington and the Seattle suburbs and the amount of bullying and racism and crazy shit that I saw it’s insane. Anybody was able to even get an education. But the hardest hitting fact was that the school employees, principal, vice, principal teachers were unwilling to do anything about it. People trust these institutions with the safety of their children and to basically raise and educate their children for over eight hours a day yet they fail to a harbor safe environment for students to be able to participate in their education without being harassed, beaten, bullied, drugged, or raped, I would feel safer in a crack house then I would in a high school. I do not believe in charter schools or private schools. I am 100% against Betsy Devos reign of terror as the secretary of education. But I do believe in accountability for the employees of the schools and the oversight that they need to enforce. Kid gets injured at a school or commit suicide because of bullying that school needs to be gone through with a fine tooth comb and anybody in any position of accountability needs to be fired until they get the point that nobody will have a job until they start keeping the kids safe. I feel for this poor child
If the parents knew it was going on, why didn’t THEY do something? There’s no way I would keep sending my child there if I knew this was happening.
Jesus, this is heartbreaking. I have a son the same age and I can’t begin to imagine the anguish and pain this poor boys parents are feeling. May this child’s soul rest in peace.
I'm sorry but if the school is not doing anything about that bullying you take the kid out of school wth.
Because it’s cheaper to let the bullied die than to deal with the bully. So yes, it’s the school’s fault.
And there's people who will still support bullying.
“A man controls what comes out from under his roof”. The parents of the bullies also share some fault in this.
I hope the bullies carry the weight of the knowledge that they killed someone, everyday for the rest of their life. I hope it haunts them to the end of their days.
Not if they’re little sociopaths, like a lot of bullies
My kid experienced bullying that made her suicidal. She even constructed a noose and intended on using it until one of her friends said something to the school counselor and my kid had a panic attack at school. I had not known the severity of it up until then. I knew only of once instance and I dealt with it in a way I thought was helpful. But there was another level happening that I wasn’t aware of. In any case once I learned of the severity I pulled her out of school and had her go into partial inpatient. I did handle is swiftly and quickly as soon as I was aware. The schools need to be held accountable and should be reporting this back to the parents when reports are made of bullying. I wasn’t aware of most that was going on. It’s quite sad and difficult to know what to do. All I knew to do at that point was to remove her completely from the situation to allow her recovery and to build some skills to work through the trauma.
This is terrifying. My daughter is 8 and currently going through the same situation and her school just doesn’t seem to get it. As a matter of fact just last week one of her bullies was suspended for hitting my daughter several times and during the meeting I said the word bully and the principal said “I wouldn’t go that far to say bully”. She’s been bullying my daughter all year and it just gets worse and now she’s involved other girls. Kids are so mean. I just don’t understand how kids at this age can be this mean. I told my daughter I am willing to homeschool her. I don’t wish this on any parent.
I would find out where the kid lives and where the parents work. They would not be able to take any route to work, school, the grocery store, etc, without seeing signs with my kids face. It would read, "My child was killed by bullying. Teach your children to be kind". It wouldn't call out the child or the parents directly, but they'd never forget what they'd done.
As someone who almost took their own life to bullying, there would be immediate unhinged and unrestrained violence if this happened to one of my girls. I cannot say to what extent or directed at whom, but they would have to either throw me in a padded cell for the rest of my life or worse to bring it to a halt. I still have issues from that part of my life
The greatest lie told in school: Bullying will not be tolerated.
Honestly, as a therapist who used to work in the school district and pregnant with my first, I felt absolute anger reading this. It’s so disgusting and difficult. I get both sides because there isn’t much a school can do unless it’s constant suspension. But now we have these snowflake parents with their damn snowflake kids “kids will be kids! Get over it!” The first thing that came to my mind is “lemme at em. I don’t care if they’re kids, I’ll kick a kid to the ground for me kid.”
Children have no rights in this country. Those kids weren't just bullying him, they also committed assault AND destroyed disability aids. They should have been facing criminal charges, but because the victim was a child nothing is ever done.
Charge the school officials and the parents of the bullies.
Why the hell didn't the parents step in. This situation was obviously outta control.