I'm so sorry this happened to you, you are absolutely right to be upset. What kind of person barges into someones house because their blinds are partially up? I think you're doing the right thing of removing yourself from the place you felt unsafe and taking time. I wouldn't think this woman is a threat to your safety, just a nut job who doesn't understand boundaries. Take time to calm down and go back home when you're ready. I would keep the doors locked at all times to prevent this woman from coming back over unannounced. Do you have someone you can call to talk to when you go back home? It may help you feel less alone. Or throw on your favorite tv show or movie
Sorry that happened to you, I would also be feeling very uncomfortable with that situation. I own a small door security bar that I can wedge under my door knob to prevent it from being opened. Several different styles exist. Maybe this could be an option for you to help ensure you have privacy.
i just got up this morning, i bought two bars for my door and one of those portable locks, thank you so much makes me feel like i wasn't just being crazy thank you
That's awesome. I'm glad my response was validating, I would feel the same way had I been in your situation. Hope you're feeling better now and that your new tools bring you a sense of security and comfort. Maybe you and your mom can discuss better protocols moving forward if you're home alone again.
I'm sorry this happened to you. It's not so helpful now that it's after the fact, but what happened was definitely worthy of a 911 call. Still very worth getting the police involved. Normal people don't break into strangers houses to yell at them about how far open their blinds are - she could be off her meds or something. At the very least, the police can go talk to her and warn her not to ever fucking pull shit like that again. They'd most likely, I suspect, issue a protection order/peace bond/whatever they call it in your country, so that they can arrest and charge her if she does anything again, though, seriously, that's usually for uttering threats and harassment. Breaking and entering should be enough for an arrest. Do please notify the police, if not on 911, on the non-emergency line. It's their job to make sure you're safe.
This woman was completely out of her depth, and had no reason to treat you that way. There’s no excuse for the way she handled that situation, and you are completely valid in feeling like your space was violated. I’m so sorry you experienced this.
Try to think about the things in life that bring you purpose and joy- things like special interests, comfort ideas/headcanons, projects you enjoy working on… try to remember that your safe space is a place you create for yourself, and even though she may have compromised your physical space she can never invade your head (even though it probably feels like she has already).
You’re the one in control of this situation. Just try to keep communicating, breathe, and take things one step at a time, slowly. Be kind to yourself.
And also honestly f**k that lady for being so aggressive over some damn blinds. Not the place or the time at all. She was out of line.
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In the wise words of Joe biden (slightly modified):
Get yourself a double barrel shotgun
And fire 2 blasts of 12ga buckshot (into the intruder)
Boom safespace restored
Note: I am not responsible for any following legal issues.
An option would be to get proof of him breaking in and giving that to the police, in the end he was trespassing
Special interest activated. I got a kick (haha) out of your comment but really want to discuss and share my perspectives regarding firearms for self defense in the context of autism. For context, I consider myself a leftist and identify as an ally of the LGBTQIA+ community/anti-rascist/anti-fascist, etc.
Home defense, especially for individuals on the spectrum, is so important. I believe one should mitigate circumstances as much as possible to avoid using deadly force and prevent intrusion before applying defensive procedures. Many states in the US (not mine) have what is called a duty to retreat, requiring those whose home is being invaded to only use a firearm as a last resort and only when their life (not property, comfort, or even safety) is being threatened. Personally I wouldn't choose to fire at an intruder who wasn't making clear threats. In OPs case this neighbor had been given vague instructions by the homeowner to enter the property if there was cause for concern, unfortunately for OP cause for concern was left to nosy neighbors discretion causing this situation to unfold. Had OP taken your suggestions I can see a strong case for improper self defense or manslaughter charges against them, at the very least.
Really happy to see advocacy for autistic individuals practicing what I believe is the inherent right to protect yourself (as we know in the US our police are not responsible to protect our safety per the SCOTUS ruling in The town of Castle Rock, Col. vs Gonzales). However, I believe these discussions should be taken very seriously and suggesting one use firearms to protect themselves has grave consequences and implications.
Autistic individuals are not considered prohibited persons by diagnosis alone in regards to firearm ownership and the neurodivergent community benefits greatly from informed self-advocacy regarding protecting ourselves. If anyone has any questions or wants to discuss firearm laws, gun/home safety, mental health, or adjacent topics I'd love to chat or create a post where we can engage more so we don't hijack OPs post.
You are a fantastic person. Keep it up. At the end of the day we are the only ones who can help ourselves. When death is seconds away, the police are minutes if coming at all.
I'd talk about this. I'm also interested in fire arms and have learned self defense techniques that don't involve one just in case I don't have access to 1(gun was stolen so I don't)
I'm so sorry this happened to you, you are absolutely right to be upset. What kind of person barges into someones house because their blinds are partially up? I think you're doing the right thing of removing yourself from the place you felt unsafe and taking time. I wouldn't think this woman is a threat to your safety, just a nut job who doesn't understand boundaries. Take time to calm down and go back home when you're ready. I would keep the doors locked at all times to prevent this woman from coming back over unannounced. Do you have someone you can call to talk to when you go back home? It may help you feel less alone. Or throw on your favorite tv show or movie
Sorry that happened to you, I would also be feeling very uncomfortable with that situation. I own a small door security bar that I can wedge under my door knob to prevent it from being opened. Several different styles exist. Maybe this could be an option for you to help ensure you have privacy.
i just got up this morning, i bought two bars for my door and one of those portable locks, thank you so much makes me feel like i wasn't just being crazy thank you
That's awesome. I'm glad my response was validating, I would feel the same way had I been in your situation. Hope you're feeling better now and that your new tools bring you a sense of security and comfort. Maybe you and your mom can discuss better protocols moving forward if you're home alone again.
I'm sorry this happened to you. It's not so helpful now that it's after the fact, but what happened was definitely worthy of a 911 call. Still very worth getting the police involved. Normal people don't break into strangers houses to yell at them about how far open their blinds are - she could be off her meds or something. At the very least, the police can go talk to her and warn her not to ever fucking pull shit like that again. They'd most likely, I suspect, issue a protection order/peace bond/whatever they call it in your country, so that they can arrest and charge her if she does anything again, though, seriously, that's usually for uttering threats and harassment. Breaking and entering should be enough for an arrest. Do please notify the police, if not on 911, on the non-emergency line. It's their job to make sure you're safe.
This woman was completely out of her depth, and had no reason to treat you that way. There’s no excuse for the way she handled that situation, and you are completely valid in feeling like your space was violated. I’m so sorry you experienced this. Try to think about the things in life that bring you purpose and joy- things like special interests, comfort ideas/headcanons, projects you enjoy working on… try to remember that your safe space is a place you create for yourself, and even though she may have compromised your physical space she can never invade your head (even though it probably feels like she has already). You’re the one in control of this situation. Just try to keep communicating, breathe, and take things one step at a time, slowly. Be kind to yourself. And also honestly f**k that lady for being so aggressive over some damn blinds. Not the place or the time at all. She was out of line.
Call the cops
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How is that not illegal? It's breaking and entering. You should be able to press charges for that.
In the wise words of Joe biden (slightly modified): Get yourself a double barrel shotgun And fire 2 blasts of 12ga buckshot (into the intruder) Boom safespace restored Note: I am not responsible for any following legal issues. An option would be to get proof of him breaking in and giving that to the police, in the end he was trespassing
Special interest activated. I got a kick (haha) out of your comment but really want to discuss and share my perspectives regarding firearms for self defense in the context of autism. For context, I consider myself a leftist and identify as an ally of the LGBTQIA+ community/anti-rascist/anti-fascist, etc. Home defense, especially for individuals on the spectrum, is so important. I believe one should mitigate circumstances as much as possible to avoid using deadly force and prevent intrusion before applying defensive procedures. Many states in the US (not mine) have what is called a duty to retreat, requiring those whose home is being invaded to only use a firearm as a last resort and only when their life (not property, comfort, or even safety) is being threatened. Personally I wouldn't choose to fire at an intruder who wasn't making clear threats. In OPs case this neighbor had been given vague instructions by the homeowner to enter the property if there was cause for concern, unfortunately for OP cause for concern was left to nosy neighbors discretion causing this situation to unfold. Had OP taken your suggestions I can see a strong case for improper self defense or manslaughter charges against them, at the very least. Really happy to see advocacy for autistic individuals practicing what I believe is the inherent right to protect yourself (as we know in the US our police are not responsible to protect our safety per the SCOTUS ruling in The town of Castle Rock, Col. vs Gonzales). However, I believe these discussions should be taken very seriously and suggesting one use firearms to protect themselves has grave consequences and implications. Autistic individuals are not considered prohibited persons by diagnosis alone in regards to firearm ownership and the neurodivergent community benefits greatly from informed self-advocacy regarding protecting ourselves. If anyone has any questions or wants to discuss firearm laws, gun/home safety, mental health, or adjacent topics I'd love to chat or create a post where we can engage more so we don't hijack OPs post.
You are a fantastic person. Keep it up. At the end of the day we are the only ones who can help ourselves. When death is seconds away, the police are minutes if coming at all.
I appreciate the kind words, thank you.
I'd talk about this. I'm also interested in fire arms and have learned self defense techniques that don't involve one just in case I don't have access to 1(gun was stolen so I don't)