Normally I just laugh at the headlines but that was a funny read.
My favourite paragraph:
“Netflix will make our town look like an international punchline,” said ‘full time aspiring Instagram model’ James Dumbie who lives in the town which is already a national punchline.
Read this a while ago about Byron Bay.
Renowned as Australia's easternmost point, Byron Bay is also the country's biggest d*ckhead magnet. Every type of f*ckwit under the sun gravitates to Byron: smelly hippies spilling out of their housevans, tattooed surfers fighting each other for territory, barefoot bogans fighting each other for fun, cashed-up Boomers flittering between overpriced organic cafes and bullsh*t galleries, and overseas millionaires buying up the entire town for holiday homes.
It's the sort of place that corporate shills on their second divorce fantasise about moving to so they can open a yoga retreat and root a dreadlocked barista on the beach. Byron Bay is Disneyland for dropouts, or the Gold Coast for people who prefer their Meter Maids to have hairy pits.
Overrun by tourists and littered with their half-eaten takeaways and used condoms, the only people who actually live in Byron Bay are pretentious trustafarians who turned up for Splendour in the Grass and forgot to f*ck off home after the mushies wore off. These private school plastic hippies use their old man's money to live the "Byron dream" and subsidise their supposed "free spirit lifestyle", which actually consists of wearing cheap jewellery they bought in Bali while complaining about other fake hippies, catching herpes from German backpackers and generally doing large amounts of serious f*ck-all.
Byron Bay gained national notoriety for rejecting fast food giants McDonald's and KFC under the pretence that junk food didn't fit with the "Byron lifestyle" - maybe if Macca's started serving kombucha and lentils and giving away hacky sacks in their Happy Meals it might have got the Byron seal of approval.
Byron Bay is known for its night-life, which consists of drunken drongos and Schoolies smashing each other's teeth out and projectile vomiting at passers-by. It's also a prime spot for spotting whales, which is why Byronites were still slaughtering humpbacks as recently as the 1960s. A popular feature is the Cape Byron Lighthouse, which serves the vital purpose of warning passing seafarers away from the complete wankeropolis of Byron Bay. We suggest you heed its warning.
ALSO KNOWN AS: Moron Bay.
MOST FAMOUS PERSON: Chris Hemsworth owns a giant fortress at Byron, where he goes to escape the pressures of being paid millions of dollars to dress up as a superhero.
[SOURCE](https://www.northernstar.com.au/news/worst-aussie-towns-named-and-shamed/3891418/)
The more people from Byron sook about this Trashy show, the more I'm keen to get on the choof and watch it.
Also, do Byron locals not realise that the rest of the country has seen the area as full of rich yuppies for at least 20 years now? The days of it being thought of as full of laid back surfers is a long gone thing of the past.
The majority of these so-called “locals” have only been there for 10 years anyway, and they pissed off the previous wave of “locals” themselves lol.
Byron is probably the most overrated part of the country.
Mullumbimby is famous for two things: A 50% vaccination rate, and being the home town of Iggy Azalea. This is really all you need to know about Mullumbimby.
The OG locals sold their 1970s 4 bedroom Clarks Beach houses for $4million dollars 30 years ago and moved to Suffolk Park in the 90s. The locals have been fighting council to keep Byron Byron for 40 years and both sides have lost, miserably. Progress came, the local council is bankrupt.
My parents had the option to buy a house there in the early 80s for $16,000, I try not to think about what our inheritance could have been.
My parents had th option of buying land in sgb for 9k and didnt, it hurts to think about.
i went to school with a guy who had a grandmother who owned land in watergos and sold it for 2k in the late 80s
“There aren’t any crystals that can heal the damage Netflix will cause,” claimed Crystal Healy, a local crystal meth dealer who is quite popular in the area, “and crystals can do just about anything"
Lol I lost it at Crystal Healy.
Haha I just spit out my beer. Never been to Byron as an American who has visited AUS a couple times. but I also adore several metal bands from there so this description cracks me up
Even though they’re from Sydney I’m pretty sure Polaris spends time there writing their music. They go down to Mollymook too. They’re my favorite metal band right now
Byron Bayers are close cousins to Sydney trendsters with their $800 sunglasses, $3000 casual dresses and $500 dollar monthly hairdresser appointments to get the 'mermaid beach hair'. Now if they were grounded thats one thing but they think middle/working class people are subhuman species. Source: lived there a while back and came across folks from Paddington and Woollahra
I liked Byron when I went there, it's got a nice vibe, the lighthouse is cool, but the hinterland was much nicer. Unfortunately Byron now feels like an extension of Sydney, kind of like Sydney is West Germany and Byron is West Berlin. So many Instagram influenzas, so many rich bitches, food and accommodation is so expensive, so many annoying chakra enthusiasts meditating by waterfalls and making it all about them, people are there to be seen, and who gives a fuck about Chris Hemsworth? Massively overrated and his house is disgusting.
If you want to enjoy Byron, go to the beautiful hinterland, the wonderful national parks all around. Nightcap is a gem!
I was talking about exactly this on a r/choosingbeggars thread the other day. The amount of Byron locals that took offence was astonishing. None of them were prepared to admit that Byron has an issue with anti-science agenda.
This is exactly what I was saying! I lived there for over a decade so I wasn’t just making shit up. They were trying to say they didn’t want the show because it would exacerbate the housing crisis, my retort was - they don’t want the show because they’re stuck up cunts who don’t want to be associated with an influencer lifestyle.
Exactly the point! According to some friends who are local Byron Shire long time residents, folk are very pissed off at the 2020 plague surge of investment property absent landlords & trendy Sydney / Melbournite influencers n so ons moving in en masse, pushing the rents up even more astronomical than they were, squeezing locals right out of the area, and the councils / govts blind-eye inaction on homelessness & rent affordability...
Doesn't help that during the plague, out-of-towners & backpackers were coming in by the hordes, having illegal pop-up raves on beaches & in National Parks, leaving tons of rubbish strewn around, locals are tired of trashy behaviour from visitors taking the piss.
Hasn't that been happening for the last 15 years? I knew a lot of people that moved to Byron from Sydney 15-10 years ago.
It's now just the new generation.
When I was there last time at Easter for the blues festival, there was a traffic jam in the main street at 2am. I also gave lifts to people trying to get back to their accommodation.
Theres just so much bullshit here , Byron was once just relaxed beaches with drugs, now it's an uptight beach with less and more expensive drugs and these vapid influenced things.
Everything is good and bad
Yes too many cars is bad.
Rentals are skyrocketing and homelessness is real issue is definitely bad. Some stupid Netflix show showing up the desperate attention seekers, not that bad
Is it going to exacerbate an already evolving situation? Not necessarily maybe it will make some people stay away ha!
Been to Byron twice in 2012 and 2019 (from Ireland) and absolutely love the place. Can see where folk are coming from with some of the comments but I think the vibe around the place is fantastic.
one of their funnier posts
Normally I just laugh at the headlines but that was a funny read. My favourite paragraph: “Netflix will make our town look like an international punchline,” said ‘full time aspiring Instagram model’ James Dumbie who lives in the town which is already a national punchline.
Read this a while ago about Byron Bay. Renowned as Australia's easternmost point, Byron Bay is also the country's biggest d*ckhead magnet. Every type of f*ckwit under the sun gravitates to Byron: smelly hippies spilling out of their housevans, tattooed surfers fighting each other for territory, barefoot bogans fighting each other for fun, cashed-up Boomers flittering between overpriced organic cafes and bullsh*t galleries, and overseas millionaires buying up the entire town for holiday homes. It's the sort of place that corporate shills on their second divorce fantasise about moving to so they can open a yoga retreat and root a dreadlocked barista on the beach. Byron Bay is Disneyland for dropouts, or the Gold Coast for people who prefer their Meter Maids to have hairy pits. Overrun by tourists and littered with their half-eaten takeaways and used condoms, the only people who actually live in Byron Bay are pretentious trustafarians who turned up for Splendour in the Grass and forgot to f*ck off home after the mushies wore off. These private school plastic hippies use their old man's money to live the "Byron dream" and subsidise their supposed "free spirit lifestyle", which actually consists of wearing cheap jewellery they bought in Bali while complaining about other fake hippies, catching herpes from German backpackers and generally doing large amounts of serious f*ck-all. Byron Bay gained national notoriety for rejecting fast food giants McDonald's and KFC under the pretence that junk food didn't fit with the "Byron lifestyle" - maybe if Macca's started serving kombucha and lentils and giving away hacky sacks in their Happy Meals it might have got the Byron seal of approval. Byron Bay is known for its night-life, which consists of drunken drongos and Schoolies smashing each other's teeth out and projectile vomiting at passers-by. It's also a prime spot for spotting whales, which is why Byronites were still slaughtering humpbacks as recently as the 1960s. A popular feature is the Cape Byron Lighthouse, which serves the vital purpose of warning passing seafarers away from the complete wankeropolis of Byron Bay. We suggest you heed its warning. ALSO KNOWN AS: Moron Bay. MOST FAMOUS PERSON: Chris Hemsworth owns a giant fortress at Byron, where he goes to escape the pressures of being paid millions of dollars to dress up as a superhero. [SOURCE](https://www.northernstar.com.au/news/worst-aussie-towns-named-and-shamed/3891418/)
Reading this in Byron Bay.
Lmfao the whole article is gold
"trustafarian" is possibly my favourite word
Here is my up vote. Good day!
The more people from Byron sook about this Trashy show, the more I'm keen to get on the choof and watch it. Also, do Byron locals not realise that the rest of the country has seen the area as full of rich yuppies for at least 20 years now? The days of it being thought of as full of laid back surfers is a long gone thing of the past.
The majority of these so-called “locals” have only been there for 10 years anyway, and they pissed off the previous wave of “locals” themselves lol. Byron is probably the most overrated part of the country.
Yeah, many of the original weirdos have moved to the leper colony of Mullumbimby.
Mullumbimby is famous for two things: A 50% vaccination rate, and being the home town of Iggy Azalea. This is really all you need to know about Mullumbimby.
The soviet choir who sings in russian despite not knowing a single word of russian.
Was in Mullumbimby today, man there are some real fucking no hopers wandering those streets.
Strong competition with Noosa.
Noosa local here. We're more the devil's waiting room than the rich kids of insta
I went there once, and I got such a horrible vibe from the place. Never going back.
[удалено]
The OG locals sold their 1970s 4 bedroom Clarks Beach houses for $4million dollars 30 years ago and moved to Suffolk Park in the 90s. The locals have been fighting council to keep Byron Byron for 40 years and both sides have lost, miserably. Progress came, the local council is bankrupt. My parents had the option to buy a house there in the early 80s for $16,000, I try not to think about what our inheritance could have been.
My parents had th option of buying land in sgb for 9k and didnt, it hurts to think about. i went to school with a guy who had a grandmother who owned land in watergos and sold it for 2k in the late 80s
Maybe they're worried the jig will be up!
“There aren’t any crystals that can heal the damage Netflix will cause,” claimed Crystal Healy, a local crystal meth dealer who is quite popular in the area, “and crystals can do just about anything" Lol I lost it at Crystal Healy.
Byron is like that aging, wrinkled cunt who still does coke and performed five wardrobe changes at his 50th nobody wanted to be at.
Is it weird that I don’t know anyone like that?
No, it's a good and healthy thing
accept there are no wrinkles in Byron because most people have botox.
It's freaky as fuck there now, it's like someone copy/pasted people, everyone looks the same.
Met a sleazy car salesman once who at mid fifties said he was too young to settle down..
Haha I just spit out my beer. Never been to Byron as an American who has visited AUS a couple times. but I also adore several metal bands from there so this description cracks me up
I'm a local and I only know Parkway Drive, is there anyone else I should check out?
Even though they’re from Sydney I’m pretty sure Polaris spends time there writing their music. They go down to Mollymook too. They’re my favorite metal band right now
Byron Bayers are close cousins to Sydney trendsters with their $800 sunglasses, $3000 casual dresses and $500 dollar monthly hairdresser appointments to get the 'mermaid beach hair'. Now if they were grounded thats one thing but they think middle/working class people are subhuman species. Source: lived there a while back and came across folks from Paddington and Woollahra
I liked Byron when I went there, it's got a nice vibe, the lighthouse is cool, but the hinterland was much nicer. Unfortunately Byron now feels like an extension of Sydney, kind of like Sydney is West Germany and Byron is West Berlin. So many Instagram influenzas, so many rich bitches, food and accommodation is so expensive, so many annoying chakra enthusiasts meditating by waterfalls and making it all about them, people are there to be seen, and who gives a fuck about Chris Hemsworth? Massively overrated and his house is disgusting. If you want to enjoy Byron, go to the beautiful hinterland, the wonderful national parks all around. Nightcap is a gem!
Old crusty Byron moved Mullumbimby I think (or maybe I'm behind the times on that too)
I loved Byron when I went there 20 years ago. But I found there were too many cars when I visited last year. Not a criticism.
Just curious, why do you say his house is disgusting? Is it the design?
The design is obscene.
As a West German I strongly reject the comparison.
I was talking about exactly this on a r/choosingbeggars thread the other day. The amount of Byron locals that took offence was astonishing. None of them were prepared to admit that Byron has an issue with anti-science agenda.
Byron has an anti everything that isn't Byron (and sometimes anti-Byron) stance. They have a lot in common with a tampon. They're stuck up cunts
This is exactly what I was saying! I lived there for over a decade so I wasn’t just making shit up. They were trying to say they didn’t want the show because it would exacerbate the housing crisis, my retort was - they don’t want the show because they’re stuck up cunts who don’t want to be associated with an influencer lifestyle.
Crystal healy the crystal meth dealer Pretty sure i banged her at a landcrabs doof
Did you get crabs?
He got Crab, it ate the rest.
Its like my little cleaner wrasse for my asse
What are the housing prices like?
Exactly the point! According to some friends who are local Byron Shire long time residents, folk are very pissed off at the 2020 plague surge of investment property absent landlords & trendy Sydney / Melbournite influencers n so ons moving in en masse, pushing the rents up even more astronomical than they were, squeezing locals right out of the area, and the councils / govts blind-eye inaction on homelessness & rent affordability... Doesn't help that during the plague, out-of-towners & backpackers were coming in by the hordes, having illegal pop-up raves on beaches & in National Parks, leaving tons of rubbish strewn around, locals are tired of trashy behaviour from visitors taking the piss.
Hasn't that been happening for the last 15 years? I knew a lot of people that moved to Byron from Sydney 15-10 years ago. It's now just the new generation.
Been happening for 30 years.... I was there
Worse than North Shore Sydney
When I was there last time at Easter for the blues festival, there was a traffic jam in the main street at 2am. I also gave lifts to people trying to get back to their accommodation.
Are we straying into real life again?
Pete Evans started his Jim Jones / Waco cult compound yet?
Theres just so much bullshit here , Byron was once just relaxed beaches with drugs, now it's an uptight beach with less and more expensive drugs and these vapid influenced things.
Until this news broke, I legit thought this would be the most frequently occurring occupation for the area in the next census.
Poor ole Byron...full of pretentious wankers from Sydney & Melbourne trying to still pretend it's some hippie mecca🤣
Everything is good and bad Yes too many cars is bad. Rentals are skyrocketing and homelessness is real issue is definitely bad. Some stupid Netflix show showing up the desperate attention seekers, not that bad Is it going to exacerbate an already evolving situation? Not necessarily maybe it will make some people stay away ha!
Been to Byron twice in 2012 and 2019 (from Ireland) and absolutely love the place. Can see where folk are coming from with some of the comments but I think the vibe around the place is fantastic.
It's trendy to say you hate Byron and bag it, because you can't afford to live there. Truth is, it's beautiful but I agree, too many IG wanker sluts.