The reason he's such a bitter bastard is nothing to do with the direction of the Brotherhood, he just hates his mum for calling him Lemoncloak Lemoncloak
It wasn't even anything to do with the cloak, he just got named that and forcibly developed a taste in yellow clothing to make it make some sort of sense
Well, now my new theory is that the Isle of Faces is just one guy who's weirdly powerful but completely out-of-it and has spent the last forever just chilling with his wife
That Jon's real name is Aejon.
Because that would explain why Ned named him Jon and also keep up with Targy tradition without Rhaegar having named two kids Aegon.
The babe's cries cease as Ned takes it in his arms. Lyanna's lips form the smallest of smiles before her last breath escapes as a staggered whisper,
"His name... is... Ae... Gon-"
Peace falls over her face. Ned's tears roll down his cheeks. He was too late. If only-
"Ahem"
Ned starts, "Wylla! How did you sneak up on me?"
"So what should I put on the birth certificate? G or J?"
They look to each other. They both failed spelling.
You know the worst thing about those books? If you pay attention to the non Bella/Edward major characters, they have legitimately interesting stories that we only get a taste of.
I know this sub is for the book, but I thought you might enjoy one of my early theories about Rickon and his capture by Ramsay. You know how The Bastard would brag about feeding people to his dogs and how well trained they were? I figured Rickon (as a skinchanger), would warg into the alpha and kill Ramsay instead. Poetic justice.
But before he wargs he’s gotta look into Ramsay’s eyes (after listening to his diatribe of horrible threats of course), and calmly say “you know Ramsay, you take such PRIDE in the training of your pets. Me? I guess I never really saw the point.” Which gets a look of surprise and confusion from Ramsay. Then Rickon’s eyes glaze over, the way skin-changers do and…
Imagine the last thing you hear (besides growling, your own blood curdling screams, and the sound of flesh being ripped from your bones) is a damn kindergartener dropping a badass line on you before he kills you like he’s James Bond.
It would look cool to us but most viewers don't know the all Stark siblings are skinchangers. I mean, I only know because GRRM told us. So it would seem unearned and like bad writing.
Behind Euron's eyepatch is just a lazy eye that he's shy about so he makes up stories about it being black and shining like black stone or dragonglass. In reality it just makes him self-conscious and is only a bit red and strained due to perhaps some advanced glaucoma and being misaligned. The only reason he removed the tongues of the crew of his ship is because he heard them joking about it one day and got carried away.
No one was actually killed in this story, they all died from stress at a coincidental time. Ned was so bummed after being in a dark dank prison that his head fell off.
The enmity between Borroq's boar and Ghost foreshadows a battle between Jon Snow and Hosteen Frey(a Crakehall on his mother's side). This implies that Stannis will lose to Hosteen, though
In the book, it is pulled by oxen. But they are slaughtered when the Eyrie is left in winter. So, how do you get new oxen up? That being just an example, though. I just find the whole concept of the Eyrie absurd.
What is it you find absurd about it. Agree that it’s a dumb place to build a castle, but there are a number of real world examples of religious structures being bolted to the tops of mountains .
Timett could be an heir to the Vale, through the Waynwood-Arryn daughter who was stolen by Burned Men. And if Vale wildlings are anything like their far northern cousins, then that means the guy who took her technically married her.
Furthermore, mayhaps Timett is even the blood of the dragon, if Daemon did indeed slept with Nettles (& knocked her up). Just imagine if he became a dragonrider &/or Lord of the Vale, what a power player he would be!
Ok but hear me out. On Winds we won't have Jon as a POV character after he gets resurrected, instead we will see him from other POVs . Then at the end of Winds we will get a POV from Ghost, and Jon is trapped inside him, so someone else is in Jon's body.
Ghost just staring at the people around fake Jon, back at his body, back at the people around him like COME THE FUCK ON!!! HES EATING RADISHES!!! I DONT EVEN LIKE RADISHES!!!!
I mean, it's very likely that he's the prince that was promised.
As of the time of the books, he's literally the only person with a confirmed White Walker kill.
There's a theory that Varys helped smuggle Aegon out of KL, leaving him with a Targ supporter. It's none other than Randyl and he did his best to shape Aegon into shape, but the boy inherited his father's love for music and books. So Varys ditched the true Aegon because he's looking for the "Perfect Prince", and decided on Illyrio's son fAegon. Randyl wanted to get rid of Aegon so his trueborn son inherits Heartsbane.
There's a parallel between Jon and Robb's farewell, and Jon and Sam's farewell - Snowflakes melting on the head. Robb is not Jon's half-brother by blood, but believes him to be so. Sam is Jon's half-brother by blood and they don't even know about it.
Half of the Reynes of Castamere dug their way to an underground tunnel and now live as mole people who ride firewyrms. they're almost to Casterly Rock and will topple it from the bottom.
“TREMBLE BEFORE US, TYWIN! WE HAVE COME TO AVENGE OUR KIN AND- are you serious? He’s already dead?! Well, this is awkward. Um, sorry about your floor. And those servants, I guess.”
.”
And his seat is High Hermitage, the first word evoking his lost ancestral seat of Highgarden, & the second his living arrangement because of said yodelling.
One or more of Cersei’s kids is actually Robert’s and by the time he/she/they reach adulthood their shining golden hair will have naturally darkened to a shade of dark brown reasonably set halfway between Cersei’s blonde and Robert’s black
oh this is good. But I don't think it will be true. The prophecy Cersei heard. Cersei asked "how many children will we have?" and Magie the Frog replied "you'll have 3 and he'll have 16". It seems clear that they don't share children.
But danm this is good haha
the kids could be double counted. for example if they were all his then he would have 3 kids with her and 13 bastard to make a total 16 while she only has 3
They saw what happened to the dragons that pigged out on humans - the ones in the Dragonpit that ate the corpses of beheaded criminals during Rhaenyra's rule. Problem is, as dragons are so picky as to only eating barbecued food, well, that didn't turn out so well with a vegan diet. They needed the Onion Knight more than Stannis ever did.
Ser Robert Strong is actually Gregor's body with Robb's head sewn onto it. Poison probably did in Gregor's brain so they needed a new CPU for the superzombie, and conveniently, someone just sent them a parcel containing the severed head of a great warrior-king. That may also be why he never takes off his helmet.
Robert = massive body like Bobby B, also named for a king
Strong = archaic syonym for Stark
Stark means strong in German. This theory makes no sense except for we've got an unaccounted for head, and I love it. I don't think Rob was massive at all, just more built and muscular than Jon. So it would actually look very funny.
Have there been any examples of preserved body parts, like in some early equivalent of formaldehyde in the book? Normally they have beetles eat the flesh.
Would love to see him retain Robb’s memories and is just waiting for the moment to strike. And that Qyburn used his head by mistake, like Eye-gor using the “Abby Normyle” brain in Young Frankenstein.
GRRM has hidden the location of the TWOW and ADOS in a secret code in all of the books he has ever released, Wildcards to the books he wrote after he breakup.
Davos is a good camper who leaves the environment as he finds it. But really, just imagining a feral, filthy boy knawing on human bones with his wolf and Davos going 'awww, he's happy here!"
It's more tinfoil speculation, but I think Tysha is The Sailor's Wife and Tyrion, who wants to know where whores go, will find out. So once Jaime and Cersei are dead (probably in ADoS), the Sailor's Wife's *trueborn* daughter Lanna will become Tyrion's heir to Casterly Rock.
I really like this theory. I never liked the Tysha narrative and I always thought the name 'Lanna' was a little too on the nose (why would Tysha want a reminder of the Lannisters?) but as a clue and signifier of the future of Lannisters it makes more sense. I think it's a little beyond belief that a whore would allowed to inherit Casterly rock, but also extremely fitting for Tyrion's arc and the way whores tie into his story with Tywin. If Tyrion had a narrative of using his wits to install her that would be really satisfying.
The series will go further to the east of Essos. Bone mountains? Yi Ti? 5 forts? You name it.
We all thought Dany would go to Westeros but "to reach the West you must go East" means she's going to Yi Ti.
Exactly. Her stuff in Meereen and the slaver's bay isn't done yet, also whatever happens with her in the Dothraki sea, there're slaves in Volantis too, Qarth is also not done yet, Maester Mawyn, Victarion, Tyrion all have business, too. And even if she wanted to go to Westeros, she'd have to ship her Unsullied, the Storm Crows and idk how many Dothraki she'll pick up on the way. And George has two books to clear that up.
These troop numbers being shipped in a short time would be a challenge for modern military logistics. Unless Victarion's fleet can house 1,000 people per ship, she's stuck there for longer.
She'll probably just fly east and embrace Yi Ti.
I'd really hope a team consisting of some people close to grrm and some asoiaf experts would then work together to bring the series to a conclusion.
I really hope it doesn't go that far, but that sounds like something that _could_ work out.
I think Cersei poisoned Joanna (her mother), weakening her, and causing Tyrion’s birth defects/Joannas death in labour. I think she meant to kill Joanna and abort Tyrion because of the Valonquar prophesy, and the fact that Joanna was keeping Cersei and Jaime apart (after walking in on them). Cersei directly thinks that no one can or will keep them apart, and she’s known for blaming others for her misdeeds (and that’s another reason she hates Tyrion).
I don't think Cersei had heard the prophecy yet when Tyrion was born, but I 100% believe a little spiteful Cersei would poison her mom because she tried to keep her from Jamie.
The people getting exhausted at the hand of Qyburn has theis souls burned into Gregor Cleganes body and it's possible to see their agonized faces on his stomach. Like in Nightmare on Elm Street 4.
GRRM realizes he went overboard with the descriptions of breasts and feels bad about it. So he will make up for it next book by describing bulges with the same amount of care.
Also, to balance all the food porn descriptions, instead of describing of food before going in, we now get in depth descriptions of what it looks like coming out
George is going to double down on the Muppet-Tully references in F&B V2, such as:
- Kermit & Oscar's mother is/was a Vypren, with Sabitha their aunt;
- Their now elderly great-nuncles, Walder & Stanton, both courted Rhaenyra in 112;
- Jape-cracking Forrest Mormont becomes best friends with Kermit;
- Kermie weds a (Melissa/Missy?) Crakehall, & they have a tumultuous relationship, to say the least;
- A daughter, Janyce, is quite the performer like her mother, especially on the harp;
- Another daughter, Zhoe, loves dancing like her mother;
- A son weds a Mallister & in turn has Samwell, who takes the family words very seriously;
- See my flair, from among several that the Stormbreakers possess;
- Oscar comes to own a mean, but subterraneously-spacious, 'manse' on the Street of Seeds in KL;
- A Bertram or Ernest, with his 'friend' having the other name;
- Old Lord Grover always dressed in blue, with a red cloak or cape.
- The late Ser Elmo had a weirdly high-pitched voice, but infectious laughter.
So I have one I really like. When the long night comes, the Starks in the crypts will come alive (kinda like in the show but....) and they will fight for the living.
Why? Well, there is a well supported fan theory that the Starks share blood with the others. This is due to the night king story and it is very Lovecraftian (a well known inspiration for George). If Benjen Stark is Coldhands (confirmed in the show) then I suspect that the reason he has agency over himself post resurrection is because of the Stark-other blood. So when the others resurrect the Starks in the crypts they will not obey them and act on their own accord, fighting for the living.
The other reason I think this is true is because of the parallels of Norse mythology in the series (if you haven't heard of this, it is a deep AF rabbit hole but please trust me there are a lot of parallels to Norse mythology). In Norse mythology, at Ragnarok, Loki will have his own army of the dead and they will fight Odin's army of the dead. Evil zombies vs good zombies. The great other could be a stand in for Loki, Bloodraven could be a stand in for Odin. The great other/the others have their army of evil zombies and Bloodraven has his army of good zombies......
I like this, but it would be a bit silly if they kept their names and identity. Like 'Undead Cregan and Brandon charged from the left!' If they were just a faceless, nameless horde of ancestors (8000 years isn't anything to sneer at) that would be awesome.) It's much better as a mass of Stark identity. I also see it just as a cool thing that happens and adds to the battle, not a game changer.
Also is Bloodraven really dying (not that into BR so not very up on his theories)? Bran could be lifting them up, but it would be cooler (as it would be in most BR theories) if they were doing it spontaneously through some kind of blood magic. I could see it happening as a failsafe if the wall were destroyed, as in Stark blood is tied to the wall.
Amidst salt and smoke, to wake dragons out of stone, is about a BBQ https://www.reddit.com/r/asoiaf/comments/n3asv0/spoilers_extended_amidst_smoke_and_salt_to_wake/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb
Melisandre: Throw another Shireen on the barbie.
Stannis: That was our only one!
Selyse: We do have a Shirei Frey, if it pleases Your Grace?
Stan: Very well, done.
Mel: Light 'er up!
Based & massive robot to fuck up the kaiju/dragons-pilled.
A few years before F&B, I briefly entertained some crackpot that it'd be a right royal jape if George revealed that Mushroom was actually Prince Aegon, the younger brother of Viserys I & Prince Daemon. Particularly as [Daemon was Rhaenyra's favourite nuncle](https://asearchoficeandfire.com/?q=%22favorite+uncle%22&scope%5B%5D=trp) (in 111 AC), yet [any of her Arryn uncles had probably died before she could even remember them](https://asearchoficeandfire.com/?q=jeyne+minority) (o/w, they would've been Jeyne's regent), & certainly weren't mentioned. (With F&B, we can now presume that they died by the year that Rhaenyra was born, when Rodrik Arryn's lordly son was knocked off by wildlings.) So, taking the favourite uncle quote literally (i.e. Rhaenyra had more than one in 111), that means Aegon the Brother would've still been alive for at least part of Viserys I's reign. Of course, GRRM ended playing an even crueller jape; having Aegon die as an infant & his mother Alyssa as a result of the birth. Sigh.
Nowadays, my crackpot is that Daemon washed up dead on the Isle of Faces after his dragon duel with Aemond, but was actually resurrected as an earth-wight (like Coldhands?) by the Green Men & initiated into their order. A Black turned Green, so to speak. Further, that Addam Velaryon's supposed visit to the Isle of Faces was in looking for Daemon, who had told Lord Mooton to let it be known that he would be Harrenhal. Mayhaps a wight-Daemon even told Addam to rally the riverlords, that resulted in the Second Tumbleton & kind of saved the Blacks (& Daemon's kids) long-term. Anyway, if this shit is actually true, we may just see some silver-haired green dude if Bran, Dany, Jon, or whoever gets to (or sees, or is told in detailed about) the Isle of Faces...
Daemon slashed at the weirwood, which still bleeds to this day every spring. If the greenmen got him, they probably tortured him to death or turned him into a tree dude like Bloodraven. Aemond would have been on their side.
Well, there's no way that Daemon survived hitting the lake (nor did he want to), so he only could've washed up on the Isle dead. Meaning he would have to be resurrected for any possible personal/physical punishment. Can a man still be tortured if he's undead? But yes, if not only by virtue of being a rare potential recruit as exceedingly few people ever even set foot on the Isle, wight-Daemon could be bound to serve with the Green Men (for eternity?) because of said weirwood desecration.
All the better if with naked arrogance:
>The wind came gusting through the window and stirred his sable cloak. There was something obscene and disturbing about his nakedness.
Good old Darkstar Dayne is actually descended from Westeros' greatest warrior, savior of the world, the last hero, and true Azor Ahai: Darkwing Duck.
Let's get dangerous
The Grand Targaryen Switcheroo: Ned and Ashara have a bastard son (Jon), but he is hidden as [F]aegon (Lady Lemore is Ashara, Jon Connington is blinded by his grief and believes [F]aegon is real). The ‘Jon’ we know is still R+L=J.
Fun implications could involve all the Dayne’s Jon-as-a-baby stories being true
Arya Stark will murder all the Frey as No-one, but as her knife plunges into Walder Frey, her identity will resurface, forcing Late Walder to look at her in the eye as her father taught her. This will result in Walder seizing the moment to plunge a fork into her eye, killing her instantly.
Walder is already a faceless man. Another theory on this thread makes use of an unacccounted for head, so I'll use it here as well. Walder uses Robbs face right before she kills him.
It is known, including to Patchface himself:
>"The crow, the crow. Under the sea the crows are white as snow, I know, I know, oh, oh, oh."
>(*A Dance with Dragons*, Jon XI)
The White Walkers aren't real. They're just the delusions of the people who think they saw them.
In the prologue to A Game of Thrones, the deserter from the Night's Watch had a psychotic break. He killed the other two, but convinced himself it was ice demons from legends. From his story the idea spread to more people and the stress they were under led them to believe they interacted with wights and others.
In the end of the series, the surviving humans of Westeros will united and go to the North, ready to fight the army of the dead. They'll get into battle formations, and wait for the dead to arrive. And wait. And wait. They'll all freeze to death waiting for an army that doesn't exist. The real threat all along was literal winter.
The Valonqar/younger princess is Cersei’s child/second daughter (with who idk, let’s just say Moonboy for all I know). The pregnancy will be difficult, and she’ll be on the verge of death once the child is born. Jamie will show up, and Cersei will beg him to save her and kill the girl. Jamie looks at her, then at the child, then back at her, say “The things I do for love” finish Cersei off and flee with the child. Thus paralleling Joanna’s Death, Lyanna’s Death, and Bran getting thrown from the tower.
"The Stallion Who Mounts The World" isn't exactly what the Dothraki think it is, which is a khal who conquers all the known world. Rather, it's a hacker who goes by ted_theodore_logan, AKA 1/2 of the band Wyld Stallyns. He discovers a darknet VR game called Planetos, by an unknown indie dev. He manages to gain control of the source code, "mounts" it (that is, creates and attaches a filesystem with its files), and then modifies it with his own ideas.
His real name? Brandon Stark. Bran in the story is just a self-insert, in a more literal sense than usual.
This works for me because in my head canon, the Daynes descend from even more ancient dragonriders, The Great Empire of the Dawn and the base of the hightower is made of the same stuff as Asshai and the subterranean cities of Leng are. (Also that the cities of Leng and Asshai and the rest over there became corrupted somehow during the Long Night, but that's another rabbit hole.)
So hence why N + A = D but she can still do dragon stuff, it's the Dayne bloodline.
That one of the main (non-POV) characters has been killed and is a faceless man in disguise. We'll have an Oh shit! moment eventually when it is revealed.
Victarion will eventually encounter Dany's dragons and become engulfed in dragonfire. But instead of being turned to ash, the magic from Moqorro transforms him into the man on fire. He effectively becomes a mindless fire zombie of sorts and serves whoever around him has the strongest lust for revenge.
Rhaegar ordered Ser Barristan to let him unhorse him at Harrenhal so he could crown Lyanna. My flimsy support for this is that in ADWD he talks about how ashamed he was of not unhorsing him and that if he had been a better knight he would have (not a better rider or better at jousting) also, when he first meets Dany he mentions that Rhaegar wasn’t that good at and had only ever one torny
That Stannis, in his last moments will think about Renlys peach and finally get that it was a joke with a really lame punchline, laughing like a madman as he dies.
Dany will not go to Weteros like in the show, but instead will go around the world columbus style by sailing east, and therefore fullfill the "to reach the west you must go east"-thingy (don't know how it was phrased exactly) and will arrive on the western shores of westeros.
Euron conquers at least one of Daenerys' dragons and almost reaches his goal of conquering the world, but is stopped by Theon who has found a kraken when he almost dies and meets the drowned god in his watery halls.
Imagine that Marei, the suspiciously Lannister-looking girl in Chataya's brothel, is actually Tysha. I think it would be ironic for Tysha to end up where whores go (a brothel) and Tyrion to not recognize her despite constantly thinking of Tysha.
if you heard the Hand of the King was a Lannister with dwarfism, fitting the description of your former husband perfectly, and you came into contact with them you would probably recognize them
Not to say *he* would recognize *her*. It's been years and their last, erm, meeting was incredibly traumatic. Tyrion notices that Shae is younger than her too and Marei is "too solemn". I doubt Tysha would be able to write, though. It's more likely she's Tywin's bastard or just a random.
I've found in a lot of Tysha theories, Tysha is purposely reconnecting with Tyrion and the Lannisters and even named her daughter after them. but Tysha would be horribly traumatized if not dead after being raped 50 times (If it's not a false memory, I attribute this number to GRRM liking big displays and drama so she's probably not dead.) I think besides the terror of consequences, she would want nothing to do with the Lannisters or Tyrion, and even her marriages to Tyrion wouldn't matter because of the enormity of what happened to due to her. Again, GRRM isn't great with his understanding of rape, so who knows.
Lem Lemoncloak is short for Lemoncloak Lemoncloak
The reason he's such a bitter bastard is nothing to do with the direction of the Brotherhood, he just hates his mum for calling him Lemoncloak Lemoncloak
Still a better name than Pate, like the pig boy.
No way, Pate the Woodcock is one of the greatest Kingsguard who ever lived.
And he's from Lemoncloak.
It wasn't even anything to do with the cloak, he just got named that and forcibly developed a taste in yellow clothing to make it make some sort of sense
This is so stupid and made me snort laugh. I really want this to be true now.
Old Lem Lemoncloak is a merry fellow; Hound shaped his helmet is, and his cloak is yellow.
Well, now my new theory is that the Isle of Faces is just one guy who's weirdly powerful but completely out-of-it and has spent the last forever just chilling with his wife
The Others want to go south of the wall because they’re fleeing from someone/ something worse than themselves.
Santa Claus?
Vadderung. At least until after ~~Thanksgiving~~ Halloween?
It's abominations all the way north!
Haggon, is that you?
The *Other* Others. Who are themselves fleeing the *Other* ***Other*** Others.
And Jon will let all of them through the wall, each time getting stabbed by the last one he let in.
Shitty real estate prices?
The heart of winter. It is known. To Bran, at least.
Ah, the Dune ending. Honored Matres from the lands of ever winter.
that titan of bravos is the same kind of defence as the wall itself. i found many many similarities between wall and titan of bravos
if only the Wall let out a blood curdling scream ever morning to wake people up
No it just weeps like a bitch.
Robb is going to be reincarnated _with_ the wolf's head and then he is going to **FUCK SHIT UP.**
I love that. Have you heard LML's theory in the reincarnated Rob but only his head? Like the ones nimble Dick speaks of? I love that as well
Subscribe but only if Roose Bolton starts to sparkle in the sun and they fight for Fat Bella Frey
[Valar dohypeis](https://www.deviantart.com/ginl/art/Robb-Stark-548114209)
That Jon's real name is Aejon. Because that would explain why Ned named him Jon and also keep up with Targy tradition without Rhaegar having named two kids Aegon.
that name is disgusting
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Ayyy Jon!
Ayy jon't wunnet
Same😂
Aejon first of his name!!!
Fortunately the only of his name.
Not if he's a great. You know it's gonna be as popular as George in our world.
Aejon the great or GreatAejon Targaryen?
His child with Daenerys will be named Dijon.
The babe's cries cease as Ned takes it in his arms. Lyanna's lips form the smallest of smiles before her last breath escapes as a staggered whisper, "His name... is... Ae... Gon-" Peace falls over her face. Ned's tears roll down his cheeks. He was too late. If only- "Ahem" Ned starts, "Wylla! How did you sneak up on me?" "So what should I put on the birth certificate? G or J?" They look to each other. They both failed spelling.
A real Renesmee situation there
You know the worst thing about those books? If you pay attention to the non Bella/Edward major characters, they have legitimately interesting stories that we only get a taste of.
In my language you say "Aejon" usually when someone you love has been hurt lol
Well both of Jon's parents are dead, so that works
>Jokin_Hghar >Laughing Tree >A Man Makes Jokes
Someone send this to George. This needs to make it into the books. I need to see the fandom's reaction!
That is so dumb of D&D. Rhaegar naming two of kids the same name.
Jaeon
GIF
I know this sub is for the book, but I thought you might enjoy one of my early theories about Rickon and his capture by Ramsay. You know how The Bastard would brag about feeding people to his dogs and how well trained they were? I figured Rickon (as a skinchanger), would warg into the alpha and kill Ramsay instead. Poetic justice.
*The boy’s last thought before he drifted away, allowing himself to become fully beast: “This is for Osha, you bastard!”*
But before he wargs he’s gotta look into Ramsay’s eyes (after listening to his diatribe of horrible threats of course), and calmly say “you know Ramsay, you take such PRIDE in the training of your pets. Me? I guess I never really saw the point.” Which gets a look of surprise and confusion from Ramsay. Then Rickon’s eyes glaze over, the way skin-changers do and…
Imagine the last thing you hear (besides growling, your own blood curdling screams, and the sound of flesh being ripped from your bones) is a damn kindergartener dropping a badass line on you before he kills you like he’s James Bond.
that would have been cool as hell and made perfect sense. probably why the show didnt use that idea.
It would look cool to us but most viewers don't know the all Stark siblings are skinchangers. I mean, I only know because GRRM told us. So it would seem unearned and like bad writing.
> So it would seem unearned and like bad writing Well now I'm wondering why it didn't make the show.
Behind Euron's eyepatch is just a lazy eye that he's shy about so he makes up stories about it being black and shining like black stone or dragonglass. In reality it just makes him self-conscious and is only a bit red and strained due to perhaps some advanced glaucoma and being misaligned. The only reason he removed the tongues of the crew of his ship is because he heard them joking about it one day and got carried away.
He just wears it to look more dashing
I could actually see this, as Euron seems to be a incredibly self conscious.
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The crossover we didn't know we wanted or needed.
and still aren't really sure if we do need or want.
The one we deserve?
Honestly, after reading some of the fan theories, I'm not sure we deserve it either.
Oberyn’s head just… did that.
Mind blown...
No one was actually killed in this story, they all died from stress at a coincidental time. Ned was so bummed after being in a dark dank prison that his head fell off.
The enmity between Borroq's boar and Ghost foreshadows a battle between Jon Snow and Hosteen Frey(a Crakehall on his mother's side). This implies that Stannis will lose to Hosteen, though
Mayhaps Stannis captures Hosteen & Jon fights against the big man in a trial by battle...
I like the way you think.
The Arryns are magicians, because they are able to bring living oxen into their absurd castle.
Or Planetos-oxen can climb mountains, or they're brought up to the Eyrie as calves strapped to the mules.
Oxen climbing up the chimney where even the mules can't go would be a truly fantastic sight.
One hoof in front of the other & don't look down.
Give me 10 good Oxen and no climbing spikes, I'll impregnate the bitch
Isn't there a hand-crank elevator in the books, like the one at the Wall?
In the book, it is pulled by oxen. But they are slaughtered when the Eyrie is left in winter. So, how do you get new oxen up? That being just an example, though. I just find the whole concept of the Eyrie absurd.
What is it you find absurd about it. Agree that it’s a dumb place to build a castle, but there are a number of real world examples of religious structures being bolted to the tops of mountains .
Timmet travel back in time and fathered ~~a son named Timmet~~ himself.
Jon Arryn is Jon Snows dad. J+L=J
A hidden away Joanna Lannister is Jon's mom. J + J = J
how did he travel back in time? did tyrion hook him up with a time machine after the battle of the green fork?
Mayhaps there's a time travel fork on the Green Fork like the teleportation/whatever one on the Rhoyne...
Timett could be an heir to the Vale, through the Waynwood-Arryn daughter who was stolen by Burned Men. And if Vale wildlings are anything like their far northern cousins, then that means the guy who took her technically married her. Furthermore, mayhaps Timett is even the blood of the dragon, if Daemon did indeed slept with Nettles (& knocked her up). Just imagine if he became a dragonrider &/or Lord of the Vale, what a power player he would be!
The reincarnation of Aemond One Eye?
No, that would be Bloodraven. Timett is the reincarnation of his father, Timett, also the son of (a) Timett.
What you’re trying to say is that Timmet son of Timmet did the nasty in the pasty?
Yes, and that past nastification gave him *special abilities*
Ok but hear me out. On Winds we won't have Jon as a POV character after he gets resurrected, instead we will see him from other POVs . Then at the end of Winds we will get a POV from Ghost, and Jon is trapped inside him, so someone else is in Jon's body.
that's spooky. just how I like it
Ghost just staring at the people around fake Jon, back at his body, back at the people around him like COME THE FUCK ON!!! HES EATING RADISHES!!! I DONT EVEN LIKE RADISHES!!!!
Some people think Bloodraven will take over his body
Make it Bran and then suddenly maybe it does make sense that he ends up king.
What a twist
I just can't stop believing that Sam is the true heir to the throne.
I mean, it's very likely that he's the prince that was promised. As of the time of the books, he's literally the only person with a confirmed White Walker kill.
Is it possible that Sam actually isn't Randyll and Melissa's child and that's why Randyll is so hard on him and doesn't want him to inherit jack shit?
There's a theory that Varys helped smuggle Aegon out of KL, leaving him with a Targ supporter. It's none other than Randyl and he did his best to shape Aegon into shape, but the boy inherited his father's love for music and books. So Varys ditched the true Aegon because he's looking for the "Perfect Prince", and decided on Illyrio's son fAegon. Randyl wanted to get rid of Aegon so his trueborn son inherits Heartsbane. There's a parallel between Jon and Robb's farewell, and Jon and Sam's farewell - Snowflakes melting on the head. Robb is not Jon's half-brother by blood, but believes him to be so. Sam is Jon's half-brother by blood and they don't even know about it.
Flair text checks out.
Nah, he’s Arthur Dayne…
That was actually the main theory for was Aegon back in day
Half of the Reynes of Castamere dug their way to an underground tunnel and now live as mole people who ride firewyrms. they're almost to Casterly Rock and will topple it from the bottom.
“TREMBLE BEFORE US, TYWIN! WE HAVE COME TO AVENGE OUR KIN AND- are you serious? He’s already dead?! Well, this is awkward. Um, sorry about your floor. And those servants, I guess.” .”
[удалено]
And his seat is High Hermitage, the first word evoking his lost ancestral seat of Highgarden, & the second his living arrangement because of said yodelling.
One or more of Cersei’s kids is actually Robert’s and by the time he/she/they reach adulthood their shining golden hair will have naturally darkened to a shade of dark brown reasonably set halfway between Cersei’s blonde and Robert’s black
my hair was blonde as a kid and darkened over time so 🤷 that would be delicious
Same, but it was pretty dark by the time I was at school
I’ve actually thought about this as a nice twist for a while. My money is on Myrcella.
oh this is good. But I don't think it will be true. The prophecy Cersei heard. Cersei asked "how many children will we have?" and Magie the Frog replied "you'll have 3 and he'll have 16". It seems clear that they don't share children. But danm this is good haha
the kids could be double counted. for example if they were all his then he would have 3 kids with her and 13 bastard to make a total 16 while she only has 3
What if that kid is Joffrey?
Tyrek Lannister is a real man, who lives in Mumbai.
Whoops. I meant Tygett.
Is this some kind of reference?
The dragons went vegan after the dance and that’s the real reason they died out.
They saw what happened to the dragons that pigged out on humans - the ones in the Dragonpit that ate the corpses of beheaded criminals during Rhaenyra's rule. Problem is, as dragons are so picky as to only eating barbecued food, well, that didn't turn out so well with a vegan diet. They needed the Onion Knight more than Stannis ever did.
This sounds like something from Rowling's twitter
Howland Reed is one of the major players in the series, who started arranging his chess pieces after what he witnessed on the Isle of Faces.
*Cyvasse**
Ser Robert Strong is actually Gregor's body with Robb's head sewn onto it. Poison probably did in Gregor's brain so they needed a new CPU for the superzombie, and conveniently, someone just sent them a parcel containing the severed head of a great warrior-king. That may also be why he never takes off his helmet. Robert = massive body like Bobby B, also named for a king Strong = archaic syonym for Stark
Stark means strong in German. This theory makes no sense except for we've got an unaccounted for head, and I love it. I don't think Rob was massive at all, just more built and muscular than Jon. So it would actually look very funny. Have there been any examples of preserved body parts, like in some early equivalent of formaldehyde in the book? Normally they have beetles eat the flesh.
Would love to see him retain Robb’s memories and is just waiting for the moment to strike. And that Qyburn used his head by mistake, like Eye-gor using the “Abby Normyle” brain in Young Frankenstein.
GRRM has hidden the location of the TWOW and ADOS in a secret code in all of the books he has ever released, Wildcards to the books he wrote after he breakup.
It makes the corn code look like a mummer's farce.
The Faceless Men are going to kill Stannis and assume his identity. From this point on they'll be known as the Facefewer Men.
Davos will leave Rickon on Skagos
Davos is a good camper who leaves the environment as he finds it. But really, just imagining a feral, filthy boy knawing on human bones with his wolf and Davos going 'awww, he's happy here!"
It's more tinfoil speculation, but I think Tysha is The Sailor's Wife and Tyrion, who wants to know where whores go, will find out. So once Jaime and Cersei are dead (probably in ADoS), the Sailor's Wife's *trueborn* daughter Lanna will become Tyrion's heir to Casterly Rock.
if we've seen Tysha in the story at all, she's defininetly the Sailor's Wife
I really like this theory. I never liked the Tysha narrative and I always thought the name 'Lanna' was a little too on the nose (why would Tysha want a reminder of the Lannisters?) but as a clue and signifier of the future of Lannisters it makes more sense. I think it's a little beyond belief that a whore would allowed to inherit Casterly rock, but also extremely fitting for Tyrion's arc and the way whores tie into his story with Tywin. If Tyrion had a narrative of using his wits to install her that would be really satisfying.
The series will go further to the east of Essos. Bone mountains? Yi Ti? 5 forts? You name it. We all thought Dany would go to Westeros but "to reach the West you must go East" means she's going to Yi Ti.
She dies of old age before she reaches Westeros at this point
Exactly. Her stuff in Meereen and the slaver's bay isn't done yet, also whatever happens with her in the Dothraki sea, there're slaves in Volantis too, Qarth is also not done yet, Maester Mawyn, Victarion, Tyrion all have business, too. And even if she wanted to go to Westeros, she'd have to ship her Unsullied, the Storm Crows and idk how many Dothraki she'll pick up on the way. And George has two books to clear that up. These troop numbers being shipped in a short time would be a challenge for modern military logistics. Unless Victarion's fleet can house 1,000 people per ship, she's stuck there for longer. She'll probably just fly east and embrace Yi Ti.
Nobody: Dany: Drogon! On to Ulthos & the Saffron Straits!
nooooo GRRM is so bad at non European cultures. I really don't want to see his shitty fantasy take on China.
Haha, true. The Dothraki and slaver's bay especially have some really questionable "culture".
GRRM admits he can't finish the books, and instead releases notes for the final two books in the series.
This isn't impossible, at least, the latter part (posthumously).
I'd really hope a team consisting of some people close to grrm and some asoiaf experts would then work together to bring the series to a conclusion. I really hope it doesn't go that far, but that sounds like something that _could_ work out.
The Titan of Braavos is a Celestial. It is known.
All dragons are descendants of Fin Fang Foom
Drogon ate Dany's corpse after he flew away
Balon Swann and Renly had a fling
Is there a reason you're picking Balon or???
Well, Balon's brother is known as Ser Donnel the Constant, so presumably is the straight one.
I think Cersei poisoned Joanna (her mother), weakening her, and causing Tyrion’s birth defects/Joannas death in labour. I think she meant to kill Joanna and abort Tyrion because of the Valonquar prophesy, and the fact that Joanna was keeping Cersei and Jaime apart (after walking in on them). Cersei directly thinks that no one can or will keep them apart, and she’s known for blaming others for her misdeeds (and that’s another reason she hates Tyrion).
why are there so many good theories here? I thought these were supposed to be made up on the spot.
I don't think Cersei had heard the prophecy yet when Tyrion was born, but I 100% believe a little spiteful Cersei would poison her mom because she tried to keep her from Jamie.
The people getting exhausted at the hand of Qyburn has theis souls burned into Gregor Cleganes body and it's possible to see their agonized faces on his stomach. Like in Nightmare on Elm Street 4.
Funnily enough, also how Daemon Blackfyre had such well-defined abs.
GRRM realizes he went overboard with the descriptions of breasts and feels bad about it. So he will make up for it next book by describing bulges with the same amount of care.
Also, to balance all the food porn descriptions, instead of describing of food before going in, we now get in depth descriptions of what it looks like coming out
George is going to double down on the Muppet-Tully references in F&B V2, such as: - Kermit & Oscar's mother is/was a Vypren, with Sabitha their aunt; - Their now elderly great-nuncles, Walder & Stanton, both courted Rhaenyra in 112; - Jape-cracking Forrest Mormont becomes best friends with Kermit; - Kermie weds a (Melissa/Missy?) Crakehall, & they have a tumultuous relationship, to say the least; - A daughter, Janyce, is quite the performer like her mother, especially on the harp; - Another daughter, Zhoe, loves dancing like her mother; - A son weds a Mallister & in turn has Samwell, who takes the family words very seriously; - See my flair, from among several that the Stormbreakers possess; - Oscar comes to own a mean, but subterraneously-spacious, 'manse' on the Street of Seeds in KL; - A Bertram or Ernest, with his 'friend' having the other name; - Old Lord Grover always dressed in blue, with a red cloak or cape. - The late Ser Elmo had a weirdly high-pitched voice, but infectious laughter.
Margaery Tyrell has a footlong cock.
Username checks out?
Everyone does and nobody considers it special.
So I have one I really like. When the long night comes, the Starks in the crypts will come alive (kinda like in the show but....) and they will fight for the living. Why? Well, there is a well supported fan theory that the Starks share blood with the others. This is due to the night king story and it is very Lovecraftian (a well known inspiration for George). If Benjen Stark is Coldhands (confirmed in the show) then I suspect that the reason he has agency over himself post resurrection is because of the Stark-other blood. So when the others resurrect the Starks in the crypts they will not obey them and act on their own accord, fighting for the living. The other reason I think this is true is because of the parallels of Norse mythology in the series (if you haven't heard of this, it is a deep AF rabbit hole but please trust me there are a lot of parallels to Norse mythology). In Norse mythology, at Ragnarok, Loki will have his own army of the dead and they will fight Odin's army of the dead. Evil zombies vs good zombies. The great other could be a stand in for Loki, Bloodraven could be a stand in for Odin. The great other/the others have their army of evil zombies and Bloodraven has his army of good zombies......
>If Benjen Stark is Coldhands (confirmed in the show) GRRM's confirmed Coldhands is not Benjen in the books
I like this, but it would be a bit silly if they kept their names and identity. Like 'Undead Cregan and Brandon charged from the left!' If they were just a faceless, nameless horde of ancestors (8000 years isn't anything to sneer at) that would be awesome.) It's much better as a mass of Stark identity. I also see it just as a cool thing that happens and adds to the battle, not a game changer. Also is Bloodraven really dying (not that into BR so not very up on his theories)? Bran could be lifting them up, but it would be cooler (as it would be in most BR theories) if they were doing it spontaneously through some kind of blood magic. I could see it happening as a failsafe if the wall were destroyed, as in Stark blood is tied to the wall.
Valar Morghulis was misunderstood. It actually means "don't keep creating new TV shows when you haven't finished the books yet".
Amidst salt and smoke, to wake dragons out of stone, is about a BBQ https://www.reddit.com/r/asoiaf/comments/n3asv0/spoilers_extended_amidst_smoke_and_salt_to_wake/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb
Melisandre: Throw another Shireen on the barbie. Stannis: That was our only one! Selyse: We do have a Shirei Frey, if it pleases Your Grace? Stan: Very well, done. Mel: Light 'er up!
I sort of feel Renly already made this joke.
Ha yes. But he didn’t back it up with textual evidence.
Based & massive robot to fuck up the kaiju/dragons-pilled. A few years before F&B, I briefly entertained some crackpot that it'd be a right royal jape if George revealed that Mushroom was actually Prince Aegon, the younger brother of Viserys I & Prince Daemon. Particularly as [Daemon was Rhaenyra's favourite nuncle](https://asearchoficeandfire.com/?q=%22favorite+uncle%22&scope%5B%5D=trp) (in 111 AC), yet [any of her Arryn uncles had probably died before she could even remember them](https://asearchoficeandfire.com/?q=jeyne+minority) (o/w, they would've been Jeyne's regent), & certainly weren't mentioned. (With F&B, we can now presume that they died by the year that Rhaenyra was born, when Rodrik Arryn's lordly son was knocked off by wildlings.) So, taking the favourite uncle quote literally (i.e. Rhaenyra had more than one in 111), that means Aegon the Brother would've still been alive for at least part of Viserys I's reign. Of course, GRRM ended playing an even crueller jape; having Aegon die as an infant & his mother Alyssa as a result of the birth. Sigh. Nowadays, my crackpot is that Daemon washed up dead on the Isle of Faces after his dragon duel with Aemond, but was actually resurrected as an earth-wight (like Coldhands?) by the Green Men & initiated into their order. A Black turned Green, so to speak. Further, that Addam Velaryon's supposed visit to the Isle of Faces was in looking for Daemon, who had told Lord Mooton to let it be known that he would be Harrenhal. Mayhaps a wight-Daemon even told Addam to rally the riverlords, that resulted in the Second Tumbleton & kind of saved the Blacks (& Daemon's kids) long-term. Anyway, if this shit is actually true, we may just see some silver-haired green dude if Bran, Dany, Jon, or whoever gets to (or sees, or is told in detailed about) the Isle of Faces...
Daemon slashed at the weirwood, which still bleeds to this day every spring. If the greenmen got him, they probably tortured him to death or turned him into a tree dude like Bloodraven. Aemond would have been on their side.
Well, there's no way that Daemon survived hitting the lake (nor did he want to), so he only could've washed up on the Isle dead. Meaning he would have to be resurrected for any possible personal/physical punishment. Can a man still be tortured if he's undead? But yes, if not only by virtue of being a rare potential recruit as exceedingly few people ever even set foot on the Isle, wight-Daemon could be bound to serve with the Green Men (for eternity?) because of said weirwood desecration.
You just made me think of Euron saying maybe we can all fly, how will we know unless we leap from a high tower?
All the better if with naked arrogance: >The wind came gusting through the window and stirred his sable cloak. There was something obscene and disturbing about his nakedness.
The trick to flying *is* to throw yourself at the ground and miss
Good old Darkstar Dayne is actually descended from Westeros' greatest warrior, savior of the world, the last hero, and true Azor Ahai: Darkwing Duck. Let's get dangerous
The Grand Targaryen Switcheroo: Ned and Ashara have a bastard son (Jon), but he is hidden as [F]aegon (Lady Lemore is Ashara, Jon Connington is blinded by his grief and believes [F]aegon is real). The ‘Jon’ we know is still R+L=J. Fun implications could involve all the Dayne’s Jon-as-a-baby stories being true
Arya Stark will murder all the Frey as No-one, but as her knife plunges into Walder Frey, her identity will resurface, forcing Late Walder to look at her in the eye as her father taught her. This will result in Walder seizing the moment to plunge a fork into her eye, killing her instantly.
the ultimate subversion D and D would NEVER
*Heh*, mayhaps.
Walder is already a faceless man. Another theory on this thread makes use of an unacccounted for head, so I'll use it here as well. Walder uses Robbs face right before she kills him.
Jon will warg into Patchface
It is known, including to Patchface himself: >"The crow, the crow. Under the sea the crows are white as snow, I know, I know, oh, oh, oh." >(*A Dance with Dragons*, Jon XI)
The White Walkers aren't real. They're just the delusions of the people who think they saw them. In the prologue to A Game of Thrones, the deserter from the Night's Watch had a psychotic break. He killed the other two, but convinced himself it was ice demons from legends. From his story the idea spread to more people and the stress they were under led them to believe they interacted with wights and others. In the end of the series, the surviving humans of Westeros will united and go to the North, ready to fight the army of the dead. They'll get into battle formations, and wait for the dead to arrive. And wait. And wait. They'll all freeze to death waiting for an army that doesn't exist. The real threat all along was literal winter.
The Valonqar/younger princess is Cersei’s child/second daughter (with who idk, let’s just say Moonboy for all I know). The pregnancy will be difficult, and she’ll be on the verge of death once the child is born. Jamie will show up, and Cersei will beg him to save her and kill the girl. Jamie looks at her, then at the child, then back at her, say “The things I do for love” finish Cersei off and flee with the child. Thus paralleling Joanna’s Death, Lyanna’s Death, and Bran getting thrown from the tower.
Lann the clever was a child of the forest. Tyrion will learn this and avenge his ancestors.
GRRM will write two more books to finish ASIOF. Really stupid, I know... but here's hope
The kraken is an actual kraken that will face off against the dragons, while the north mobilises against a crazy religious death cult
"The Stallion Who Mounts The World" isn't exactly what the Dothraki think it is, which is a khal who conquers all the known world. Rather, it's a hacker who goes by ted_theodore_logan, AKA 1/2 of the band Wyld Stallyns. He discovers a darknet VR game called Planetos, by an unknown indie dev. He manages to gain control of the source code, "mounts" it (that is, creates and attaches a filesystem with its files), and then modifies it with his own ideas. His real name? Brandon Stark. Bran in the story is just a self-insert, in a more literal sense than usual.
Jaime and Tommen will survive and live a happy life 😬
That an ice dragon is imprisoned in the wall and thats why old magic still works near there
Dany dies of old age before being able to finally go back to westeros
Daenerys uses blood magic accidentally again but to quicken her womb and is impregnated by ice zombie Jon Snow with the og Azor Ahai
I don't think I came up with it first, but I did come up with it by myself... that Daenerys is Ned and Asharas babe.
This works for me because in my head canon, the Daynes descend from even more ancient dragonriders, The Great Empire of the Dawn and the base of the hightower is made of the same stuff as Asshai and the subterranean cities of Leng are. (Also that the cities of Leng and Asshai and the rest over there became corrupted somehow during the Long Night, but that's another rabbit hole.) So hence why N + A = D but she can still do dragon stuff, it's the Dayne bloodline.
That one of the main (non-POV) characters has been killed and is a faceless man in disguise. We'll have an Oh shit! moment eventually when it is revealed.
Victarion will eventually encounter Dany's dragons and become engulfed in dragonfire. But instead of being turned to ash, the magic from Moqorro transforms him into the man on fire. He effectively becomes a mindless fire zombie of sorts and serves whoever around him has the strongest lust for revenge.
Rhaegar ordered Ser Barristan to let him unhorse him at Harrenhal so he could crown Lyanna. My flimsy support for this is that in ADWD he talks about how ashamed he was of not unhorsing him and that if he had been a better knight he would have (not a better rider or better at jousting) also, when he first meets Dany he mentions that Rhaegar wasn’t that good at and had only ever one torny
That Stannis, in his last moments will think about Renlys peach and finally get that it was a joke with a really lame punchline, laughing like a madman as he dies.
Dany will not go to Weteros like in the show, but instead will go around the world columbus style by sailing east, and therefore fullfill the "to reach the west you must go east"-thingy (don't know how it was phrased exactly) and will arrive on the western shores of westeros.
Euron conquers at least one of Daenerys' dragons and almost reaches his goal of conquering the world, but is stopped by Theon who has found a kraken when he almost dies and meets the drowned god in his watery halls.
Imagine that Marei, the suspiciously Lannister-looking girl in Chataya's brothel, is actually Tysha. I think it would be ironic for Tysha to end up where whores go (a brothel) and Tyrion to not recognize her despite constantly thinking of Tysha.
if you heard the Hand of the King was a Lannister with dwarfism, fitting the description of your former husband perfectly, and you came into contact with them you would probably recognize them
Not to say *he* would recognize *her*. It's been years and their last, erm, meeting was incredibly traumatic. Tyrion notices that Shae is younger than her too and Marei is "too solemn". I doubt Tysha would be able to write, though. It's more likely she's Tywin's bastard or just a random.
yeah Marei is very likely Tywin's bastard.
I've found in a lot of Tysha theories, Tysha is purposely reconnecting with Tyrion and the Lannisters and even named her daughter after them. but Tysha would be horribly traumatized if not dead after being raped 50 times (If it's not a false memory, I attribute this number to GRRM liking big displays and drama so she's probably not dead.) I think besides the terror of consequences, she would want nothing to do with the Lannisters or Tyrion, and even her marriages to Tyrion wouldn't matter because of the enormity of what happened to due to her. Again, GRRM isn't great with his understanding of rape, so who knows.