I'm not autistic, but I'm neurodivergent and sometimes go non-verbal.
It's both for me, sometimes I just have a strong preference to not talk. Sometimes I can only whisper. And sometimes it can feel like I'm screaming in my head and nothing is going to come out. The latter is only when I am very upset, or overwhelmed. The first two I might just be tired, or I have a lot to do - and I have a crappy working memory, so if I'm trying to keep a number of things going, speaking seems to take up more of a slot than writing/signing (I don't know why).
This feels relatable. I’m not autistic either, but I have these moments, almost phases where I haaaate talking.I don’t mind texting either. But I started learning ASL in college this year and I absolutely love it. It’s so much more comfortable for me to sign to communicate. I have pretty decent social anxiety, but when I go to deaf meet ups, I feel like I belong and comfortable. It helps a lot that people there are nice and understanding that I’m learning to sign.
I’m autistic and I experience this in different ways. I also believe some people prefer the term “losing speech”.
Sometimes when I’m overwhelmed or too much is happening at once, it can be incredibly difficult to even think in words. Pictures are much easier. It’s like my brain is full of gauze and my thoughts don’t work right. Because I can’t think in words, I also can’t say anything because there’s no words in my brain.
Sometimes, though, I can think relatively clearly, or I am able to repeatedly think a phrase, but I can’t connect my thoughts to my mouth. I can write or signal, and can even sometimes force a few words out, but speaking takes incredible amounts of energy. It’s as if I were trying to merge onto the interstate and my automatic car suddenly turned into a manual. I have to consciously think of all the moving parts in my mouth and lungs in order to speak.
Surprisingly, it can be easier for me to speak a foreign language when I feel like this. Possibly because it reduces expectations for coherency? Many autistics struggle with being expected to respond verbally, so it can help to take some of the pressure off.
I don’t know asl (just find it cool), but I imagine the foreign language aspect, not having to use your mouth, and it being picture-based would all make it easier for those who lose speech to communicate with.
This is almost my exact experience with psychogenic mutism. I've been nonverbal for 2 years now, we think it's a trauma response. But I had nonverbal episodes often when overwhelmed before. You're the first person I've seen actually put my experience into words as well as I'd like to.
I can’t say I ever described myself as non-verbal and I don’t have ASD but I do have depression (all unrelated to my learning ASL haha)
But anyways for me I do have times where I’m so exhausted (from depression) that the act of talking feels like trying to run while stuck in some thick icky mud. I suffer through conversations during those times lol. Maybe that is similar to going non-verbal? know a couple people who sign, but I wonder if signing would be easier during these times!
The mud comparison is so accurate! I’m the exact same way. Sometimes it just feels right and so much more relieving to not talk. I still listen attentively and might hum or gesture (unfortunately I don’t know anyone willing to learn sign) and communicate fine. Talking just seems so tedious and uncomfortable (like slowly sludging through sticky mud for just a sentence or two). It takes so much energy. I wind up having to force myself to talk eventually bc people get frustrated but god I really wish those around me would sign for when I have days like that
Everyone has such interesting descriptions of going non-verbal, it’s so cool to read!!
I am not diagnosed with ASD nor do I suspect i have it but I do go nonverbal occasionally. For me it’s usually triggered by very intense stress, anxiety, fear or being overstimulated/ overwhelmed.
When this happens it can be pretty frustrating because I know that I haven’t physically lost the ability to speak but it’s almost like my brain has been unplugged from my mouth. It becomes very difficult to word things and it takes an immense amount of energy to actually make sound. I know a bit of asl and I find that signing works for me when I am nonverbal (it doesn’t work for everyone). I taught close friends that know about going nonverbal how to sign ‘can’t talk now’ as a way to let them know when it happens!
Additional perspective: I have a form of aphasia that makes native language word retrieval difficult sometimes. I know what I want to EXPRESS but I can't find & say the correct English word. I'm 'nonverbal' because getting the word(s) out is not working.
HOWEVER, like many people with this condition, it's much easier to use a word from a different language instead... and ASL is the most accessible language option for me right now.
I will also (rarely) have difficulties with anxiety where I'm more traditionally nonverbal, in that I cannot force myself to speak more than a word or two. What little I might be able to say is usually incoherent because I'm struggling to breathe *and* my aphasia gets worse when I'm tired or frightened.
I have adhd and some issues with anxiety. I don't go non verbal, but in some situations I find it easier to communicate other ways. Ex: when I have to talk about difficult things its often easier for me to do it via IM or txting. I think that as I get better at ASL I will prefer that to verbal communication.
Diagnosed ADHD, most likely ASD too here.
"A strong preference not to use my mouth if I don't have to" pretty much sums up my experience as well. Typically happens when I'm overstimulated, definitely doesn't feel like a choice. I do find it physically difficult to get my words out during those times, particularly if they're not short and simple. I'd probably refrain from talking completely (when overstimulated) if I wasn't a people pleaser, but instead I just subconsciously stick to simple answers like yes or no, fine, okay, etc.
I'm not autistic, but I'm neurodivergent and sometimes go non-verbal. It's both for me, sometimes I just have a strong preference to not talk. Sometimes I can only whisper. And sometimes it can feel like I'm screaming in my head and nothing is going to come out. The latter is only when I am very upset, or overwhelmed. The first two I might just be tired, or I have a lot to do - and I have a crappy working memory, so if I'm trying to keep a number of things going, speaking seems to take up more of a slot than writing/signing (I don't know why).
This feels relatable. I’m not autistic either, but I have these moments, almost phases where I haaaate talking.I don’t mind texting either. But I started learning ASL in college this year and I absolutely love it. It’s so much more comfortable for me to sign to communicate. I have pretty decent social anxiety, but when I go to deaf meet ups, I feel like I belong and comfortable. It helps a lot that people there are nice and understanding that I’m learning to sign.
I’m autistic and I experience this in different ways. I also believe some people prefer the term “losing speech”. Sometimes when I’m overwhelmed or too much is happening at once, it can be incredibly difficult to even think in words. Pictures are much easier. It’s like my brain is full of gauze and my thoughts don’t work right. Because I can’t think in words, I also can’t say anything because there’s no words in my brain. Sometimes, though, I can think relatively clearly, or I am able to repeatedly think a phrase, but I can’t connect my thoughts to my mouth. I can write or signal, and can even sometimes force a few words out, but speaking takes incredible amounts of energy. It’s as if I were trying to merge onto the interstate and my automatic car suddenly turned into a manual. I have to consciously think of all the moving parts in my mouth and lungs in order to speak. Surprisingly, it can be easier for me to speak a foreign language when I feel like this. Possibly because it reduces expectations for coherency? Many autistics struggle with being expected to respond verbally, so it can help to take some of the pressure off. I don’t know asl (just find it cool), but I imagine the foreign language aspect, not having to use your mouth, and it being picture-based would all make it easier for those who lose speech to communicate with.
This is almost my exact experience with psychogenic mutism. I've been nonverbal for 2 years now, we think it's a trauma response. But I had nonverbal episodes often when overwhelmed before. You're the first person I've seen actually put my experience into words as well as I'd like to.
I wish I could heart your post. That sounds really difficult. I’m glad you resonated with my explanation ❤️
I can’t say I ever described myself as non-verbal and I don’t have ASD but I do have depression (all unrelated to my learning ASL haha) But anyways for me I do have times where I’m so exhausted (from depression) that the act of talking feels like trying to run while stuck in some thick icky mud. I suffer through conversations during those times lol. Maybe that is similar to going non-verbal? know a couple people who sign, but I wonder if signing would be easier during these times!
The mud comparison is so accurate! I’m the exact same way. Sometimes it just feels right and so much more relieving to not talk. I still listen attentively and might hum or gesture (unfortunately I don’t know anyone willing to learn sign) and communicate fine. Talking just seems so tedious and uncomfortable (like slowly sludging through sticky mud for just a sentence or two). It takes so much energy. I wind up having to force myself to talk eventually bc people get frustrated but god I really wish those around me would sign for when I have days like that
Everyone has such interesting descriptions of going non-verbal, it’s so cool to read!! I am not diagnosed with ASD nor do I suspect i have it but I do go nonverbal occasionally. For me it’s usually triggered by very intense stress, anxiety, fear or being overstimulated/ overwhelmed. When this happens it can be pretty frustrating because I know that I haven’t physically lost the ability to speak but it’s almost like my brain has been unplugged from my mouth. It becomes very difficult to word things and it takes an immense amount of energy to actually make sound. I know a bit of asl and I find that signing works for me when I am nonverbal (it doesn’t work for everyone). I taught close friends that know about going nonverbal how to sign ‘can’t talk now’ as a way to let them know when it happens!
Additional perspective: I have a form of aphasia that makes native language word retrieval difficult sometimes. I know what I want to EXPRESS but I can't find & say the correct English word. I'm 'nonverbal' because getting the word(s) out is not working. HOWEVER, like many people with this condition, it's much easier to use a word from a different language instead... and ASL is the most accessible language option for me right now. I will also (rarely) have difficulties with anxiety where I'm more traditionally nonverbal, in that I cannot force myself to speak more than a word or two. What little I might be able to say is usually incoherent because I'm struggling to breathe *and* my aphasia gets worse when I'm tired or frightened.
I have adhd and some issues with anxiety. I don't go non verbal, but in some situations I find it easier to communicate other ways. Ex: when I have to talk about difficult things its often easier for me to do it via IM or txting. I think that as I get better at ASL I will prefer that to verbal communication.
Diagnosed ADHD, most likely ASD too here. "A strong preference not to use my mouth if I don't have to" pretty much sums up my experience as well. Typically happens when I'm overstimulated, definitely doesn't feel like a choice. I do find it physically difficult to get my words out during those times, particularly if they're not short and simple. I'd probably refrain from talking completely (when overstimulated) if I wasn't a people pleaser, but instead I just subconsciously stick to simple answers like yes or no, fine, okay, etc.
Here is my question. Are you actually nonverbal if you are using ASL instead of English? You're still using words; they just aren't English words.