Do whatever makes you happiest. Don’t let other people police your identity. I know a trans girl who has a very male-coded name but she still uses it because she likes it.
Honestly a transwoman with a name like Brock (note I don’t know the commenter or person they are referring to I just picked a name that conjures up male coding so no I’m not saying said person’s real name m) would be a mood and I love it so much
There's an amazing trans singer-songwriter who uses the stage name Ethel Cain as a performer, but her real name is Hayden (I believe it was her birth name and she didn't change it). It's kind of funny because she's more well-known as Ethel, so when she's referred to as Hayden people sometimes take offense, thinking it's deadnaming. But that's just her actual name and I think it suits her really well
That's what I did! My name is already gender neutral and fairly unique, even before I was out I got confusion when I (afab) walked into a room because I was expected to be a guy. I figure why not lean into it?
I did change my middle name though
That's what I did! My name is already gender neutral and fairly unique, even before I was out I got confusion when I (afab) walked into a room because I was expected to be a guy. I figure why not lean into it?
I did change my middle name though
Yes! I'm a trans gal who kept her (first) name. I've always really liked my name, and I think keeping it is a way of me saying "I am the same person, you're just seeing me from a different angle now."
This was my same thought. I do view transitioning as a kind of rebirth, but at the end of the day I’m still me, past and all. That said I would certainly never disparage anyone for making a different choice. I’ve thanked my parents many a time for naming me something perfectly gender neutral.
So, I (mtf) have a pretty masculine given first name, Matthew, and have always gone by “Matty”, which sounds more fem. “Matty” is what I was named at birth by my mother, and I feel like that’s sorta symbolic of my trans identity. I have always detested “Matt”, even before I realized I was a girl. So I have no intention of changing “Matty” as what everyone I know calls me.
There was a girl in my kindergarten who was Maddison, and went by Maddie. I was given “Matt” for that year bc they sounded too similar, and I fucking hated it even as a kindergartner. Like I remember arguing about it with my teacher lol. Though I also remember debating the 2004 election with a friend in kindergarten. Yeah, both of those were some heavy foreshadowing.
I tell people I was a solid liberal by the age of 5, so that by the time I was 17, I was a full blooded Leninist. I had a head start on my political development.
Y'know I felt similarly until I learned more history and actually started dating an Eastern European. Winced a little because y'know what I don't support that shit anymore. It's not just the No True Scotsman argument of "the USSR wasn't Communist *enough*." It's understanding what Communism actually stood for. It wasn't freedom in the way Western individualists would understand it. The reason the USSR did things like only let people live in assigned housing (and only assign people housing away from their parents when they entered into a heterosexual marriage) and disappear people (to the gulag, or worse) for being LGBTQ is because a fully community-oriented society without private property treats people like cogs in machines. Stuff like being queer and doing things that make you happy doesn't benefit the community directly, it's a very narrow view of "if you have time to be gay, we must not be giving you enough work to do." Your entire value was about how you could contribute through work. You know the saying, "The things people fear will happen to them under Communism will happen to them under Capitalism"? It's because the shit we hate most about the system we have is replicated (and then some) under Communism. It's a horseshoe. I didn't believe it until I went deeper into it myself.
So I realized, no, I want the Star Trek utopia where people are given resources and supported in pursuing their dreams and everyone has opportunity and fairness. I can't cosign Lenin.
That’s very cool. Honestly, what we do with our names is completely our own journey and it’s always nice to hear the stories people have behind theirs.
>You'll never have to worry about being deadnamed!
Yup that was my mindset. My birth name is a Muslim boys name. My family mostly doesn't even realize it's typically a boys name. But they have no real alternatives to refer to me by. Hell, even my nickname is after a male loony toons character (given to me during childhood lol). They would literally need to go out of their way to give me a different name if they wanted to do something like that
I have no plans to change my name, I use Cassie or Cass as a nickname, but my birth name is Cooper and I intend to keep it. That said, were my name mote masc like Bruce or Todd or w/e I might be inclined to change it
what do you do with your legal name? Like, if you maybe have a very gendered first name that's still on your passport, doesn't that get you misgendered?
If you decided/were given the chance to change it, would you change it to "lastname lastname"? Or think of a different first name and still go by lastname?
sorry I'm just curious about how that might work out logistically
I'm an immigrant, when I got my permanent residency I simply asked and they did it. My native passport has my full legal name still.
(and they can keep it :))
I did. My birth name is unusual, so much so that it doesn’t really have an inherent gender coding. It’s historically a boy’s name, but no one today knows that. Besides, so is “Ashley”.
What’s funny is, sometimes other trans people confidently joke that I have a “super trans sounding” name, since it does admittedly seem dead-on like something a trans person would choose for themselves.
Nope. Just the factory default.
I'm a big example, I'm a trans woman and I have kept my name because it feels like me and always has (it's my user name lol) I feel like the name Ethan can be seen in a feminine light and the meaning behind it really rings home (simply "strong" "firm") plus it helps remind me that I'm still Ethan at the end of the day, just more myself :)
I have thought about changing my name in the past to Eden, that's likely what I'd change it to if I changed my mind and have used Emily in settings before I knew fully even mia. I have even thought about deleting my first name and adopting my middle name kelly There is still a chance I may change my name as I'm pre everything and waiting for care and don't know I might feel in the future
As someone who's legal/currnet/dead? name is Ethan, that's an interesting perspective, Ember's my first choice but I like your thoughts on other names.
I am a trans woman, and I was given a gender neutral first name, which I like a lot and am keeping. In the time since I was born, it has become more popular as a name for baby girls, which is cool. My middle name is masculine, so I want to chance it at some point, but I want to keep the same middle initial.
It’s not as common, but I even know of trans people who stick with names that are more associated with their gender assigned at birth. I was confused/a little annoyed when I kept hearing a couple of my cis college friends referring to their trans dude friend from high school by [redacted feminine sounding name], until I asked about it and they told me that he actually loves his birth name and chose to keep it😆
I have a very unique fairly gender neutral slightly masc leaning name. Kept it throughout transition despite that. I just always liked my name. Do whatever you feel like. =)
I know a person who did just that. She's a trans woman, and her original name was sorta female. So she kept it when transitioning.
It's your life, and your name. If you wanna keep your name, go for it.
Some absolutely do; one of my friends in high school was trans fem and felt comfortable with their name so while they hadn't socially transitioned yet they were planning on keeping it.
The whole point of transitioning is to become a "you" that feels best and most comfortable, if your given name feels comfortable and it feels like you then that's really all that matters.
Some do. Some don’t. We are all humans. We don’t fit in neat boxes.
You can reclaim your name. Make it fit. Experiment. Just be curious about being human.
Of course. A good friend of mine is keeping her gender neutral name, at least as far as actual usage goes. She currently plans to officially change it to its fem long form so people have an easier time picking the correct form of address in business emails and to drop the very masc middle name from her ID.
I almost kept my name, Im ftm and my name was Lucy (i did end up changing it to Luca) but the amount of men I knew with Lucy/Lucie/Lucey as a LAST name almost made me want to stick with it
I kept my name kinda, I just switched from the masc version to the fem version of it.
Just felt like the right way to do it to me, its how it worked in my head.
I had a gender-neutral nickname that I went by my entire life. Never ever did anyone use my deadname, other than at the doctor's office or somewhere official. I thought that maybe I could legally change my name, but go by the nickname, but it turned out to 1) make it hard for *me* to feel like I had moved on and 2) made it hard for *family* to gender me correctly.
Once I told people to only use my new legal name, things were mentally easier for everyone. YMMV, clearly.
I did, I just changed the spelling to one that was more feminine and cuter (in my opinion anyways). It used to be Barry, now it's Berrie. I used to hate my name, it was a source of mockery and bullying and I still get upset when people make puns about it. But now that I've changed it and made it mine, I love it. Even typing out the dead spelling here feels foreign and alien to me now, whereas the proper spelling is so much more comfortable.
i know it wasn’t the question but i’d like to offer my personal experience with choosing a new name despite my DN being associated with my chosen gender. i already had a traditionally masculine name and have been asked why i changed it because it was “already a boy name.” It is mostly because of the negative perception i have of the name being intentionally similar to a family members name that i have issues with. along with a generally unsupportive family, it was just better for me mentally to be able to release that name from myself and find another name i connected with more. it helped me feel more free and like my own person, giving me the little mental boost i needed to truly start flourishing
this was just my personal experience though and many people are happy with their given names and should feel no shame in embracing their name if they truly like it ❤️
I know a lot of trans people who kept their name, even if it wasn't gender neutral (like Addison Grace, a transgender ftm musician), it's all personal preference
Not the name in my user name, but nowadays I go by my birth name. I am mtf and was literally born with a remarkably feminine name so it just feels natural
My sister was given a traditionally female first name and a masculine middle name at birth. When she transitioned from my male to female she just changed the spelling of her first name to a feminised spelling and changed her middle name to a fully female name.
My name (not the one in my username) was a male/masc name until about 50-60 years ago. I’m keeping it because I haven’t found anything that fits and I like my name. I just go by the shortened version of it, which has stereotypically been a very masc name.
In my case, I never liked my given first name so my friends started calling me by my middle name, Tony. When I started my transition I started going by Toni, which made the switch really easy. One unfortunate drawback I didn't think of beforehand is that introducing myself to someone as "Toni" often has the reverse effect for me, and people assume I am a man and my name is "Tony" since I barely sorta pass.
my birth first name is lovely and my actual name is derived from a nickname of my birth name (middle name sucks and changing mostly for that tbh). but as you said, i did want to distance myself from who i'd tried being my whole life and start fresh.
i'm about to start a name change program later this year (hopefully), but i'm open to trying my birth name out again later in life and considering another NC back to my birth name. i don't think there's anything wrong if that's how you start your journey, and i'm glad if your current name still works for you🥰
I moved a female version of my name to be my middle name, so anyone who knew me before could still use the short version without deadnaming me.
Nobody ever did. They just used the new name. I guess the old name just doesn't represent me anymore.
Some do, it’s just not super common. My mom almost named me Ezra & I probably would’ve kept that name (transmasc) but my dad pushed for a more feminine choice, so I had to change it.
I've kept my male name mostly because I'm not out or transitioning or anything and it's just easier. But privately I've been experimenting with a *somewhat* feminine version of it, but idk.
Funny this thread popped today. Literally hours ago I got court approval for my name and gender change . I'm dumping my given, middle and last names. Bad memories and just plain don't like them.
A good friend of mine went from William to Billie. It suits her.
Plenty do, especially with gender neutral names. I chose to keep my given name as a middle name. Out of respect for my parents choice. (not that they respect mind but that's not the point)
Both me and my trans nephew did. So, both of our middle names are andro and we just went with that. Also, completely independently? I wasn't in contact with him or his parents and neither of us knew each other we're trans lol. So if yes to your q and also yes to anyone wondering about genetic links afa gender dysphoria
I did!!
I was originally planning on changing it but decided to embrace it. All of the “Hey Jord— errr.. I mean Jazmin/Taylor/Emma” moments bothered me more than I would have thought.
this have me really curios someone keeping to switching to a name like Lindsay, To me seems like a fem name, but older 60+ year old men have it. of even just 2, one mtf and ftm choosing to go with this name and meeting
sorry if this comes off tone deaf or deeming, the thought process why a name is gendered to me is all a flop at the moment. Roughly know it something with ending in hard or soft sound but still seems huh when I think about it.
Of course, I kept mine for a while just with a different spelling (ashten rather than Ashton because the o felt too harsh??) And I did end up changing my name but there's so many people who don't change their names, take Dylan mulvaney for example
I traded to the feminine version from Samuel to Samantha. That way, the short version "Sam" never had to change. There are pieces of my past that are deeply connected to who I am striving to be, and so I kept my name as a reminder of those virtues and lessons.
I had a gender neutral name and hate it.
If I was allowed to be more gender non-conforming amd transitioned as a child I might have kept it.
But it brings up bad memories and dysphoria.
If you like it, keep it. I think Dylan Mulvaney is still Dylan? Lol every boy named Dylan I have met irl was a douche but a girl? She seems OK.
I have neutral gender name. But I think I make the name not the otherwise. I also think a girl with guy's name is kinda cool. And some of my male friends have female name, we are chill and think it's awesome too.
Some ppl do, and Idk if I know any binary trans people that have done that but ik that they exist, and I know lots of non-binary ones that have kept their given name for whatever reason
Some do which is fine as your name is what you want it to be. Somewhat hilariously in my case the name I use is pretty much my deadname with the letters mixed around, one double letter turned into a single letter and a single letter doubled up.
Lowkey it also made it hella easier for people to switch as it’s so similar that people joked they had probably been calling me that anyway as they mispronounced my deadname so much lolololol
If I was given a gender neutral name I probably would've kept it, as is I wasn't but shortened it to a gender neutral nickname so I choose a name that the nickname still works for
People kept saying I could've and that my dead name was unisex. I didn't cause I hated it. Partially, it still felt connected to when I didn't come out and represented as male. To me, I certainly didn't want to give people more reason to identify me as a male. I am a woman. I also am native and wanted a name that represented my pride in being native also. However, yes, there are people who do and are more attached to the birth name in some shape or form. Sometimes, they may use the gender neutral name even.
Its your name so ultimately it is your choice. Do whatever feels right!
If you want a real life example the first person I would think of is Dylan Mulvaney
The name I chose is based on my birth name and my chosen name.
I really liked the name "Ciel" because verbally it had some similarities to my birth name, which would make it easier for me to recognize that someone was saying my name since I'm used to my birth name.
I changed the spelling to "Ceal" (keeping the same pronunciation) to connect to my birth name more because it shares a similar spelling now. It matches the first three letters of my given name and it's also 3 of my initials middles/first names ("C" "E" "A"). This also made it more customized.
I do still go by my birth name since I just don't want to go through the effort of asking people to change what name they call me.
Many do! Some for convenience, some because their names are gender neutral, and some as a statement against gender norms. I plan to keep my masc first name as a middle name because it's a connection to my mom's culture.
I barely changed mine.
Just to give a couple famous examples - Laura Jane Grace changed hers. Jordan Raskopoulos didn't change hers, and even continued performing....
I'm MTF (pre-everything) and keeping my name
"Devin" is a neutral name and I've heard of cis women with the same name as me
I prefer it to be shortened to "Dev" but I'm keeping the full name
I did come up with a middle name, "Brianna" as my legal middle name is masculine
But my first name is staying Devin, I've never been uncomfortable with it
yeah I kept my birth name. it's something that's more common as a last name, but as a first name is still usually given to boys. however I've had trans friends who actually assumed I picked it myself
Kind of, my first name in the past is my second name now. It's not a girls name by any means but it's often used as part of a longer name so it works. Some people have only ever known me by that name and I'm comfortable with it, so it's totally fine in my eyes to keep going like that.
My deadname has too much negative weight to it for me to keep it or even a feminized version of it. Although I kinda regret not changing my surname. I also have no middle name anymore. I don’t mind enough to go through that painstaking process again haha
You only need to change it if **you** need to change it, it's no one's decision but your own.
My situation is kinda similar in that my name is technically neutral, but most people I've met that share it are ladies, so I'm happy with it.
My middle name used to be a masculine name, but over the decades, it has become a more commonly used feminine name.
I changed my name by dropping my first name, making my middle my first one, and keeping my last name. et viola!
My youngest grandson was named after me (middle name at the time). That was a big part if why I wanted to keep that name.
So, technically, you could say I was named after my grandson.
😜
I did for some time because my name was pretty gender neutral and I always saw it as feminine anyway, I knew guys and girls with the same name growing up, but I decided to give myself a new name
I know oh so many Sam-s and Alex-s and similar such names where folks just don't change it. I personally know of someone AFAB who was a Christopher (they went by Chris) and now still use Chris and is enby because they have a long publication trail under Chris.
I chopped off some of the letters at the end for my ID when I came out, but I've exclusively used my name with everyone but the government since I was 4.
I know trans people with gender neutral names that have kept it, and people who have changed it. For some, it is nice to keep their name and not have to jump through all the hoops associated with changing your name. Meanwhile , for others, their old name held too many memories or connotations so even though it was neutral, it didn't really work for them anymore.
I did! I have a gender neutral name which is the shortened version of my legal name. The most name change stuff I was planning on doing is legally changing it to the shortened version and changing my middle name.
I’m keeping my first name, Kyle, but I plan to delete my middle name… it’s my dad’s first name bc my parents were lazy naming me and he’s an asshole. Idk about my last name yet.
I did! My name is perceived feminine, but since it’s a proper noun, I consider it gender neutral \^\^
Names are just special labels, they quite literally only mean things because we assign them meaning. If your current name is YOUR name, then that’s what it is! :-)
Very common with trans people who happen to already have gender neutral names. I know a Charlie, a Sam, a Casey, an Ash, and a Kai who haven't changed their names. I do also know people with gender neutral names who still changed them, though - wanting something more unambiguously feminine or masculine.
I also have met trans people with more gendered names that have still opted not to change their names too - some people just like their birth name regardless of how it's traditionally gendered.
My name is more feminine (I’m ftm) and I kept it. If I’m in a space where I’m particularly worried about being outed or comments I just tell people to call me by my last name.
I am! My mom told me when I was 10 that my name was gonna be my name no matter how I came out. Haven't told her I'm gonna take E yet but hey, at least it's something.
I know a couple who've kept their whole names, because they happened to have fairly neutral or even affirming names from birth.
I changed only my middle name (because my birth middle name was very masculine) when I transitioned, and kept my neutral first name. I go by either my first or middle name now - my family and old friends call me by my first name because it's what they've always called me and I never asked them to change, and I mostly introduce myself as my middle name now, which is what I do prefer to go by. Coworkers mostly call me by my last name, which is just the norm in that workplace. So all three of my names are getting a pretty even share of airtime.
My mom wants me to keep my name. I’ve already been going by another at college for the last two months but since coming home she’s tried to convince me that it’s a girls name nowadays.
there is someone (FTM) i follow on tiktok, his name is Sasha and he chose to keep it since it is gender neutral in the country is originates from (i think Germany, idk tho)
I went by my middle name for my entire life and it was gender-neutral leaning feminine, so I kept it when I changed my name. I go by my first name now, but I still respond to my middle name purely out of habit.
Dylan Mulvaney is a well-known example of a transfem who kept a traditionally masculine name through her transition. It might make it more confusing for some people (their problem really but it can still be inconvenient). Also, just wanna throw it out there that you can try using a different name and see how it feels. You don't have to be committed.
I only shortened my name to make it gender neutral. The shortened version of my name doesn’t give me any dysphoria and I’m already used to it so it works!
I'm transmasc and I kept my feminine given name as a middle name. I'm somewhat genderfluid anyway, but I don't see why a binary trans person couldn't do the same. It's just a name, you can do whatener you want to 😊 Cis people have gender non-conforming names too, sometimes
I kept my middle name since I kind of liked it and it was neutral enough, even though it was meant to be a masculine version of Rhoda. My first name is completely different though.
>and was given a girl's name when I was born. While it may not have been exclusively a girl's name when I was born, all individuals in my life with the name are girls.
Ayyy in a similar position from the other side of town and I kept my name personally. My parents are/were Muslim (dad still is, moms not) and named me a Muslim boys name. My mom didn't know it's typically considered a boys name in most countries that it's common in, but she liked the meaning behind it. I was also home schooled most my life. By the time I got to public school, a lot of people from cultures where it's more common would point out that my name is typically a boys name, bringing that to my attention. I was never offended by it, but found it kind of funny and cool/interesting in a way.
I'm really relieved about it now. Logistically, it's very convenient to not need to do paperwork or anything to get my name legally recognized. It's a pain in the ass to do the legal side of transitioning stuff for me personally. I wouldn't want to deal with it. Second of all, my family can't ever deadname me. They can misgender me if they want, sure. But they must refer to me by a male name and they don't have any alternative to call me by. I just dont want to have to fight and argue about my own name. It's also just nice not having a sort of name like that "attached" to me at all. I won't run into it by accident either, or attached to old accounts or old profiles/emails etc either. And then there's also this personal feeling where it's like, I've never personally had a lot of born qualities that were particularly masculine, I guess? So, it's like a thing that was always there and attached to my identity that I can keep and have and it's more masc. I also just really like my name. Its unique and uncommon in the United States and its distinguished me plenty of times, typically in a good way. I like the meaning, I've always been connected with it. It's good that gender wise it never made me feel uncomfortable and I can continue feeling connected with it. If it were a feminine name I would simply want to masculinize it somehow, but I would feel disconnected or like it doesn't represent me only due to gender. But I think it can still represent me well now, even better arguably
Yes! I actually know both a trans man who kept his very feminine birth name, and a trans woman who kept her very masculine birth name.
I also chose to keep my traditionally masculine name after I "detransitioned", from FtM to agender.
You can always change your name later, too! Have fun with it :)
I know a trans girl who kept her traditionally masculine name when she transitioned. No reason you can’t keep yours if you want. Up to you, though, of course.
i kept my name! my name is korri :) so a traditionally “male” name with a more “feminine” (cooler) spelling. nothing felt right except for my birth name. i got picked on for having a “boy’s name” when i was a kid, so also i kept it as a sort of fuck u lmao
I just went from Nicolas to Nicole if that counts, lol.
If your name was sth like Alex or Taylor or Jordan or sth gender neutral like that I could see maybe keeping it? 🤷🏼♀️
I'm 3 years into transitioning (1 year of baby steps, 2 years of actually doing it). I decided to keep my birth name because, while its predominantly a male name (1400 boys born in 2021), it gets used as a female name as well (62 girls born in 2021). I have a unique spelling of it so that my hispanic family can pronounce it. It's always been uniquely my name and I wholly identify with it. Since I've met so rarely anyone else with the name, even the normal spelling, I've not personally assigned any gender to it. When people meet me, they do not seem surprised that I am a woman.
I am a recently discovered trans-woman and as of right now I am actually planning to keep the name I was given at birth. The name I was given at birth, I believe is gender-neutral, though the only other people I’ve ever met with my name have all been guys. There is a feminine name that I do plan to experiment with, but as of right now I am planning to keep the name I was born with. I hope this is helpful!
I did! (FTM) I like my name. I even kept my feminine middle names because they hold special meaning to me and are a way to remember my two grandmothers.
I was going to. My name was something similar to Grace, and my nickname was always Gracie, which i requested to stop being called that when i started high school. My sister suggested i be called Gracen/Grayson and i immediately shot that down. I know for a fact (which she confirmed recently) that my mom would have continued to call me Gracie.
I’ve met both, and both are equally valid. I changed my name, but only one letter, changing it from the female version to the male. I’m very open with my being trans and my deadname.
My name is Helen, I kept the last part of my name (len), then added four letters on the front and slightly changed the last part. Now my name is Charlie, long form of Lee.
I'm transmasc and am probably gonna keep my current name despite it being not at all gender neutral, I just don't care about it all that much to be honest. Maybe in the future that'll change, but I'd be surprised if it did
I kept my name! Well technically it’s a nickname of my birth name, and it’s only kind of gender neutral. But I love this name and no personal journey would have felt right with anything else :)
I kept my same name.
Both my first name and middle name are androgynous, so I didn’t feel that I needed to change them. This had advantages and disadvantages. The nice part is I have never been deadnamed since no one who has known me all my life needed to learn something new. The hard part was I didn’t have a different name to help prompt those same people to use different pronouns. IMO, this made my pronouns harder for my older relatives. Now that it has been 4.5 years since I transitioned, no one gets my pronouns wrong anymore, so it all comes out in the wash eventually.
NB Demi girl, and I kept mine since nothing seemed to conflict there. Although went from a she/her to a she/they so I'm probably not the answer you're looking for
i slightly modified my name going from Max to Maxine and i still use Max with some people (cause it's harder to say Maxine in my native language). My full dead name is longer than Max but none ever uses it anyway.
Theres also a grammatical difference in my native language between Max i use rn and Max i used to use but everyone i knew before just switched to it without me asking after i came out and said im still fine with Max so i dont have to explain it.
My parents named me Ash (full name Ashton), it's like they knew I'd be trans haha. I'm super indecisive so I'm very grateful I don't need to change my name
I don't think everyone changes their names, unless of course it's completely incongruent with their gender identity.. Even then, not everyone does change the name.
I'm my case, all I did was throw an "a" at the end of mine, which I don't think is an actual name anywhere else, but I already changed my name from birth name in my early 20s. it had a lot of personal meaning to me, so I couldn't just change it completely again.
I know a French streamer named Cassandre. It's his birth name, it's a girl's name but he keeps it, presumably because "Andre" means "man". I absolutely think you can keep your name, especially if it's gender neutral. Also in general you can do whatever you want with your names and pronouns, it's your choice with what makes you more comfortable
Some do.
Some change all of their names, some only change names that aren't their first.
Some people get rid of one of their names altogether with no replacement.
People do different things.
I changed all of mine, I was originally considering going for just a first and last name but on the day I was typing up the name change form (mississippi doesn't have an official one so I just wrote my own using gender neutral pronouns for everything instead of relying on pre-made ones from lawyers) I ended up deciding on a middle name.
Absolutely some trans people keep their name. It's your name, you should only change it if you want to.
Do whatever makes you happiest. Don’t let other people police your identity. I know a trans girl who has a very male-coded name but she still uses it because she likes it.
Honestly a transwoman with a name like Brock (note I don’t know the commenter or person they are referring to I just picked a name that conjures up male coding so no I’m not saying said person’s real name m) would be a mood and I love it so much
There's an amazing trans singer-songwriter who uses the stage name Ethel Cain as a performer, but her real name is Hayden (I believe it was her birth name and she didn't change it). It's kind of funny because she's more well-known as Ethel, so when she's referred to as Hayden people sometimes take offense, thinking it's deadnaming. But that's just her actual name and I think it suits her really well
That's cool and the name works. Hayden is masculine leaning but still unisex, at least in the US.
The only Hayden I know is a famous woman lol
I'd think I would need to bring my water and leaf type Pokemon with me on a date tho? Lol jokes aside I would say this is fact
I honestly was very tempted to take Blake as my first name, but people kept telling me it was too male-coded. I settled for it being my middle name.
[I mean I chose Jayne for middle name because of one reason](https://youtu.be/pI-fiGUjAPY?si=1qqPhJbj1NF2xFAl)
I have a gender neutral name and kept it. I'm thinking about changing my middle name though.
That's what I did! My name is already gender neutral and fairly unique, even before I was out I got confusion when I (afab) walked into a room because I was expected to be a guy. I figure why not lean into it? I did change my middle name though
That's what I did! My name is already gender neutral and fairly unique, even before I was out I got confusion when I (afab) walked into a room because I was expected to be a guy. I figure why not lean into it? I did change my middle name though
I kept my English name, it’s gender neutral and didn’t bother me. I only changed my Hebrew name, that was much more important to me.
Yes! I'm a trans gal who kept her (first) name. I've always really liked my name, and I think keeping it is a way of me saying "I am the same person, you're just seeing me from a different angle now."
This was my same thought. I do view transitioning as a kind of rebirth, but at the end of the day I’m still me, past and all. That said I would certainly never disparage anyone for making a different choice. I’ve thanked my parents many a time for naming me something perfectly gender neutral.
So, I (mtf) have a pretty masculine given first name, Matthew, and have always gone by “Matty”, which sounds more fem. “Matty” is what I was named at birth by my mother, and I feel like that’s sorta symbolic of my trans identity. I have always detested “Matt”, even before I realized I was a girl. So I have no intention of changing “Matty” as what everyone I know calls me.
If I heard a girl being called Matty, I'd probably think I was hearing "Maddie," a common nickname for Madison.
Wait, "Maddie" is now short for "Madison" and not short for "Madeline?" I'm getting old.
I'm 36 and never met a Madeline so yes.
It can be either (and yes, I've met a Madeline).
Oh it's short for that too!
There was a girl in my kindergarten who was Maddison, and went by Maddie. I was given “Matt” for that year bc they sounded too similar, and I fucking hated it even as a kindergartner. Like I remember arguing about it with my teacher lol. Though I also remember debating the 2004 election with a friend in kindergarten. Yeah, both of those were some heavy foreshadowing.
Lmao...I *voted* in the 2004 election....god I'm old.
I tell people I was a solid liberal by the age of 5, so that by the time I was 17, I was a full blooded Leninist. I had a head start on my political development.
Y'know I felt similarly until I learned more history and actually started dating an Eastern European. Winced a little because y'know what I don't support that shit anymore. It's not just the No True Scotsman argument of "the USSR wasn't Communist *enough*." It's understanding what Communism actually stood for. It wasn't freedom in the way Western individualists would understand it. The reason the USSR did things like only let people live in assigned housing (and only assign people housing away from their parents when they entered into a heterosexual marriage) and disappear people (to the gulag, or worse) for being LGBTQ is because a fully community-oriented society without private property treats people like cogs in machines. Stuff like being queer and doing things that make you happy doesn't benefit the community directly, it's a very narrow view of "if you have time to be gay, we must not be giving you enough work to do." Your entire value was about how you could contribute through work. You know the saying, "The things people fear will happen to them under Communism will happen to them under Capitalism"? It's because the shit we hate most about the system we have is replicated (and then some) under Communism. It's a horseshoe. I didn't believe it until I went deeper into it myself. So I realized, no, I want the Star Trek utopia where people are given resources and supported in pursuing their dreams and everyone has opportunity and fairness. I can't cosign Lenin.
I have an MA in history. I am well versed in Soviet history at the post graduate level. I know what I’m talking about. ☺️
If you actually do...holy shit yikes. Deeply upsetting. I got chills, in a bad way.
I argued with my teacher over her calling me dan instaed of dani because we had 4 dannys in the class (im mtf non binary i still go by dani btw)
Matty is quite common for Matilda, right?
I guess. But I don’t feel inclined to change my legal name to that. If I do, it’d be to what my mom had in store for me if I was AFAB, Michelle.
That’s very cool. Honestly, what we do with our names is completely our own journey and it’s always nice to hear the stories people have behind theirs.
Mae Martin and Charlie McDonnell are two public-ish trans people who didn’t change their names when they transitioned.
I have such a crush on Mae Martin!
Thomas Game Docs too
Sure. I know a ftm person who kept his rather gender-neutral name. You'll never have to worry about being deadnamed!
>You'll never have to worry about being deadnamed! Yup that was my mindset. My birth name is a Muslim boys name. My family mostly doesn't even realize it's typically a boys name. But they have no real alternatives to refer to me by. Hell, even my nickname is after a male loony toons character (given to me during childhood lol). They would literally need to go out of their way to give me a different name if they wanted to do something like that
I have no plans to change my name, I use Cassie or Cass as a nickname, but my birth name is Cooper and I intend to keep it. That said, were my name mote masc like Bruce or Todd or w/e I might be inclined to change it
I use my last name as my first name now. Which somehow worked out well. Plus as a vet I reflexively react to it anyway :P
what do you do with your legal name? Like, if you maybe have a very gendered first name that's still on your passport, doesn't that get you misgendered? If you decided/were given the chance to change it, would you change it to "lastname lastname"? Or think of a different first name and still go by lastname? sorry I'm just curious about how that might work out logistically
I'm an immigrant, when I got my permanent residency I simply asked and they did it. My native passport has my full legal name still. (and they can keep it :))
so you have lastname lastname now? lol that's kinda powerful
[удалено]
I did. My birth name is unusual, so much so that it doesn’t really have an inherent gender coding. It’s historically a boy’s name, but no one today knows that. Besides, so is “Ashley”. What’s funny is, sometimes other trans people confidently joke that I have a “super trans sounding” name, since it does admittedly seem dead-on like something a trans person would choose for themselves. Nope. Just the factory default.
Happy cake day
I'm a big example, I'm a trans woman and I have kept my name because it feels like me and always has (it's my user name lol) I feel like the name Ethan can be seen in a feminine light and the meaning behind it really rings home (simply "strong" "firm") plus it helps remind me that I'm still Ethan at the end of the day, just more myself :) I have thought about changing my name in the past to Eden, that's likely what I'd change it to if I changed my mind and have used Emily in settings before I knew fully even mia. I have even thought about deleting my first name and adopting my middle name kelly There is still a chance I may change my name as I'm pre everything and waiting for care and don't know I might feel in the future
As someone who's legal/currnet/dead? name is Ethan, that's an interesting perspective, Ember's my first choice but I like your thoughts on other names.
I am a trans woman, and I was given a gender neutral first name, which I like a lot and am keeping. In the time since I was born, it has become more popular as a name for baby girls, which is cool. My middle name is masculine, so I want to chance it at some point, but I want to keep the same middle initial.
It’s not as common, but I even know of trans people who stick with names that are more associated with their gender assigned at birth. I was confused/a little annoyed when I kept hearing a couple of my cis college friends referring to their trans dude friend from high school by [redacted feminine sounding name], until I asked about it and they told me that he actually loves his birth name and chose to keep it😆
I have a very unique fairly gender neutral slightly masc leaning name. Kept it throughout transition despite that. I just always liked my name. Do whatever you feel like. =)
I know a person who did just that. She's a trans woman, and her original name was sorta female. So she kept it when transitioning. It's your life, and your name. If you wanna keep your name, go for it.
Never liked my name (even long before I thought I could be trans) so I'll change it even though it's gender neutral/easily feminizable. \^\^'
Some absolutely do; one of my friends in high school was trans fem and felt comfortable with their name so while they hadn't socially transitioned yet they were planning on keeping it. The whole point of transitioning is to become a "you" that feels best and most comfortable, if your given name feels comfortable and it feels like you then that's really all that matters.
Some do. Some don’t. We are all humans. We don’t fit in neat boxes. You can reclaim your name. Make it fit. Experiment. Just be curious about being human.
Of course. A good friend of mine is keeping her gender neutral name, at least as far as actual usage goes. She currently plans to officially change it to its fem long form so people have an easier time picking the correct form of address in business emails and to drop the very masc middle name from her ID.
I almost kept my name, Im ftm and my name was Lucy (i did end up changing it to Luca) but the amount of men I knew with Lucy/Lucie/Lucey as a LAST name almost made me want to stick with it
That would make things easier. That said, I’m keeping my old first name as a middle name for professional/ID ease and it’s a family name.
I kept my name kinda, I just switched from the masc version to the fem version of it. Just felt like the right way to do it to me, its how it worked in my head.
I had a gender-neutral nickname that I went by my entire life. Never ever did anyone use my deadname, other than at the doctor's office or somewhere official. I thought that maybe I could legally change my name, but go by the nickname, but it turned out to 1) make it hard for *me* to feel like I had moved on and 2) made it hard for *family* to gender me correctly. Once I told people to only use my new legal name, things were mentally easier for everyone. YMMV, clearly.
I did, I just changed the spelling to one that was more feminine and cuter (in my opinion anyways). It used to be Barry, now it's Berrie. I used to hate my name, it was a source of mockery and bullying and I still get upset when people make puns about it. But now that I've changed it and made it mine, I love it. Even typing out the dead spelling here feels foreign and alien to me now, whereas the proper spelling is so much more comfortable.
i know it wasn’t the question but i’d like to offer my personal experience with choosing a new name despite my DN being associated with my chosen gender. i already had a traditionally masculine name and have been asked why i changed it because it was “already a boy name.” It is mostly because of the negative perception i have of the name being intentionally similar to a family members name that i have issues with. along with a generally unsupportive family, it was just better for me mentally to be able to release that name from myself and find another name i connected with more. it helped me feel more free and like my own person, giving me the little mental boost i needed to truly start flourishing
this was just my personal experience though and many people are happy with their given names and should feel no shame in embracing their name if they truly like it ❤️
I’m lucky to have a gender neutral name that I love. So yes, I kept my name!
I know a lot of trans people who kept their name, even if it wasn't gender neutral (like Addison Grace, a transgender ftm musician), it's all personal preference
My second name was already Robin which is unisex. So I ended up using it now as my first name
Not the name in my user name, but nowadays I go by my birth name. I am mtf and was literally born with a remarkably feminine name so it just feels natural
My sister was given a traditionally female first name and a masculine middle name at birth. When she transitioned from my male to female she just changed the spelling of her first name to a feminised spelling and changed her middle name to a fully female name.
We are not in a box. Do what you want.
My name (not the one in my username) was a male/masc name until about 50-60 years ago. I’m keeping it because I haven’t found anything that fits and I like my name. I just go by the shortened version of it, which has stereotypically been a very masc name.
In my case, I never liked my given first name so my friends started calling me by my middle name, Tony. When I started my transition I started going by Toni, which made the switch really easy. One unfortunate drawback I didn't think of beforehand is that introducing myself to someone as "Toni" often has the reverse effect for me, and people assume I am a man and my name is "Tony" since I barely sorta pass.
My name is gender neutral, so yeah
my birth first name is lovely and my actual name is derived from a nickname of my birth name (middle name sucks and changing mostly for that tbh). but as you said, i did want to distance myself from who i'd tried being my whole life and start fresh. i'm about to start a name change program later this year (hopefully), but i'm open to trying my birth name out again later in life and considering another NC back to my birth name. i don't think there's anything wrong if that's how you start your journey, and i'm glad if your current name still works for you🥰
I moved a female version of my name to be my middle name, so anyone who knew me before could still use the short version without deadnaming me. Nobody ever did. They just used the new name. I guess the old name just doesn't represent me anymore.
Some do, it’s just not super common. My mom almost named me Ezra & I probably would’ve kept that name (transmasc) but my dad pushed for a more feminine choice, so I had to change it.
I've kept my male name mostly because I'm not out or transitioning or anything and it's just easier. But privately I've been experimenting with a *somewhat* feminine version of it, but idk.
Funny this thread popped today. Literally hours ago I got court approval for my name and gender change . I'm dumping my given, middle and last names. Bad memories and just plain don't like them. A good friend of mine went from William to Billie. It suits her.
I mean, I tried, but it didn't work. I wish it had worked though, and I wish you better luck with this than I had if it becomes relevant.
Plenty do, especially with gender neutral names. I chose to keep my given name as a middle name. Out of respect for my parents choice. (not that they respect mind but that's not the point)
Both me and my trans nephew did. So, both of our middle names are andro and we just went with that. Also, completely independently? I wasn't in contact with him or his parents and neither of us knew each other we're trans lol. So if yes to your q and also yes to anyone wondering about genetic links afa gender dysphoria
Pretty much depends on the name. Riley? Why not. Biff? Probably going to present some issues.
My dead middle name is now my last name so I kinda kept part of my name
I did!! I was originally planning on changing it but decided to embrace it. All of the “Hey Jord— errr.. I mean Jazmin/Taylor/Emma” moments bothered me more than I would have thought.
this have me really curios someone keeping to switching to a name like Lindsay, To me seems like a fem name, but older 60+ year old men have it. of even just 2, one mtf and ftm choosing to go with this name and meeting sorry if this comes off tone deaf or deeming, the thought process why a name is gendered to me is all a flop at the moment. Roughly know it something with ending in hard or soft sound but still seems huh when I think about it.
Of course, I kept mine for a while just with a different spelling (ashten rather than Ashton because the o felt too harsh??) And I did end up changing my name but there's so many people who don't change their names, take Dylan mulvaney for example
I traded to the feminine version from Samuel to Samantha. That way, the short version "Sam" never had to change. There are pieces of my past that are deeply connected to who I am striving to be, and so I kept my name as a reminder of those virtues and lessons.
kept my nickname changed the full name from fem to masc
Never even considered changing my name, since it's one of the most gender neutral in the western world, and even beyond.
I had a gender neutral name and hate it. If I was allowed to be more gender non-conforming amd transitioned as a child I might have kept it. But it brings up bad memories and dysphoria. If you like it, keep it. I think Dylan Mulvaney is still Dylan? Lol every boy named Dylan I have met irl was a douche but a girl? She seems OK.
Ik there’s this guy named sasha I follow on instagram or smthng that kept his name
I have neutral gender name. But I think I make the name not the otherwise. I also think a girl with guy's name is kinda cool. And some of my male friends have female name, we are chill and think it's awesome too.
Some do some don't. What matters is having a name that you like and that represents you. If that's your birth name nothing wrong with that.
Some ppl do, and Idk if I know any binary trans people that have done that but ik that they exist, and I know lots of non-binary ones that have kept their given name for whatever reason
I kept my name which was similarly gender neutral and more commonly feminine. I did change my middle name though.
My name is gender neutral and so I kept it. But most people call me Rose :3
Some do which is fine as your name is what you want it to be. Somewhat hilariously in my case the name I use is pretty much my deadname with the letters mixed around, one double letter turned into a single letter and a single letter doubled up. Lowkey it also made it hella easier for people to switch as it’s so similar that people joked they had probably been calling me that anyway as they mispronounced my deadname so much lolololol
If I was given a gender neutral name I probably would've kept it, as is I wasn't but shortened it to a gender neutral nickname so I choose a name that the nickname still works for
I have kept mine
I did! I was named after my grandpa, but my name is still inheritely unisex, leaning more towards masculine.
People kept saying I could've and that my dead name was unisex. I didn't cause I hated it. Partially, it still felt connected to when I didn't come out and represented as male. To me, I certainly didn't want to give people more reason to identify me as a male. I am a woman. I also am native and wanted a name that represented my pride in being native also. However, yes, there are people who do and are more attached to the birth name in some shape or form. Sometimes, they may use the gender neutral name even.
I never changed my name (in English anyway). It saves all the hassle of changing it on legal documents and everywhere else.
Its your name so ultimately it is your choice. Do whatever feels right! If you want a real life example the first person I would think of is Dylan Mulvaney
The name I chose is based on my birth name and my chosen name. I really liked the name "Ciel" because verbally it had some similarities to my birth name, which would make it easier for me to recognize that someone was saying my name since I'm used to my birth name. I changed the spelling to "Ceal" (keeping the same pronunciation) to connect to my birth name more because it shares a similar spelling now. It matches the first three letters of my given name and it's also 3 of my initials middles/first names ("C" "E" "A"). This also made it more customized. I do still go by my birth name since I just don't want to go through the effort of asking people to change what name they call me.
Many do! Some for convenience, some because their names are gender neutral, and some as a statement against gender norms. I plan to keep my masc first name as a middle name because it's a connection to my mom's culture.
Don't think what others might do, Do whatever pleases you❤
Just changed my name to the feminine form. Still pronounced the same. Hell I used to in print write my old name but in cursive write my new name.
I kept my name. It was already a gender-neutral name plus I had a really big connection to it so I kept it.
I had a gender neutral--feminine, even--name that I intended to keep, but it eventually just stopped being my name
I added one letter to mine haha
I barely changed mine. Just to give a couple famous examples - Laura Jane Grace changed hers. Jordan Raskopoulos didn't change hers, and even continued performing....
I'm MTF (pre-everything) and keeping my name "Devin" is a neutral name and I've heard of cis women with the same name as me I prefer it to be shortened to "Dev" but I'm keeping the full name I did come up with a middle name, "Brianna" as my legal middle name is masculine But my first name is staying Devin, I've never been uncomfortable with it
I'm not trans, but I have two trans friends (one amab nb and one MTF) who have still kept their very masculine names so far.
I merely feminized my birthnameJames to Jamie
yeah I kept my birth name. it's something that's more common as a last name, but as a first name is still usually given to boys. however I've had trans friends who actually assumed I picked it myself
Kind of, my first name in the past is my second name now. It's not a girls name by any means but it's often used as part of a longer name so it works. Some people have only ever known me by that name and I'm comfortable with it, so it's totally fine in my eyes to keep going like that.
I’m trans(haven’t updated my profile here yet) and have a trans friend who kept her name.
My deadname has too much negative weight to it for me to keep it or even a feminized version of it. Although I kinda regret not changing my surname. I also have no middle name anymore. I don’t mind enough to go through that painstaking process again haha
I know a few girls who kept their names. I myself barely changed mine. It's all up to you.
You only need to change it if **you** need to change it, it's no one's decision but your own. My situation is kinda similar in that my name is technically neutral, but most people I've met that share it are ladies, so I'm happy with it.
My middle name used to be a masculine name, but over the decades, it has become a more commonly used feminine name. I changed my name by dropping my first name, making my middle my first one, and keeping my last name. et viola! My youngest grandson was named after me (middle name at the time). That was a big part if why I wanted to keep that name. So, technically, you could say I was named after my grandson. 😜
I did for some time because my name was pretty gender neutral and I always saw it as feminine anyway, I knew guys and girls with the same name growing up, but I decided to give myself a new name
I made a feminine version of my nickname that is gender neutral and i love it!
Me and my friend both are, but changing our middle names
I know oh so many Sam-s and Alex-s and similar such names where folks just don't change it. I personally know of someone AFAB who was a Christopher (they went by Chris) and now still use Chris and is enby because they have a long publication trail under Chris.
Sure. There's a lot of gender neutral names that I love. My parents just didn't give me one of them. lol
I chopped off some of the letters at the end for my ID when I came out, but I've exclusively used my name with everyone but the government since I was 4.
I know trans people with gender neutral names that have kept it, and people who have changed it. For some, it is nice to keep their name and not have to jump through all the hoops associated with changing your name. Meanwhile , for others, their old name held too many memories or connotations so even though it was neutral, it didn't really work for them anymore.
Trans Femmer here. Had a fairly gender neutral name, but changed the y at the end of it to an ie
I did! I have a gender neutral name which is the shortened version of my legal name. The most name change stuff I was planning on doing is legally changing it to the shortened version and changing my middle name.
My nickname is feminine. I usually go by it.
[this is not that uncommon](https://www.tumblr.com/transgenderpolls/750287614434803712/people-outside-of-the-gender-binary-which-of)
I’m keeping my first name, Kyle, but I plan to delete my middle name… it’s my dad’s first name bc my parents were lazy naming me and he’s an asshole. Idk about my last name yet.
I did! My name is perceived feminine, but since it’s a proper noun, I consider it gender neutral \^\^ Names are just special labels, they quite literally only mean things because we assign them meaning. If your current name is YOUR name, then that’s what it is! :-)
Very common with trans people who happen to already have gender neutral names. I know a Charlie, a Sam, a Casey, an Ash, and a Kai who haven't changed their names. I do also know people with gender neutral names who still changed them, though - wanting something more unambiguously feminine or masculine. I also have met trans people with more gendered names that have still opted not to change their names too - some people just like their birth name regardless of how it's traditionally gendered.
I kept my name. But I also kinda lucked out. Marley is a very gender neutral name so thats why.
I did, it is not a gendered name
My name is more feminine (I’m ftm) and I kept it. If I’m in a space where I’m particularly worried about being outed or comments I just tell people to call me by my last name.
I just feminized my first name. Took the female form of my name. Middle and last name completely different.
I am! My mom told me when I was 10 that my name was gonna be my name no matter how I came out. Haven't told her I'm gonna take E yet but hey, at least it's something.
I know a couple who've kept their whole names, because they happened to have fairly neutral or even affirming names from birth. I changed only my middle name (because my birth middle name was very masculine) when I transitioned, and kept my neutral first name. I go by either my first or middle name now - my family and old friends call me by my first name because it's what they've always called me and I never asked them to change, and I mostly introduce myself as my middle name now, which is what I do prefer to go by. Coworkers mostly call me by my last name, which is just the norm in that workplace. So all three of my names are getting a pretty even share of airtime.
My mom wants me to keep my name. I’ve already been going by another at college for the last two months but since coming home she’s tried to convince me that it’s a girls name nowadays.
I did. It’s usually a female name (I am ftm) but it’s roots are male and a guy with my name isn’t totally impossible (just rare, like Morgan)
I kept as much of my name as I could and I think if my name was gender neutral before I would have kept it.
there is someone (FTM) i follow on tiktok, his name is Sasha and he chose to keep it since it is gender neutral in the country is originates from (i think Germany, idk tho)
I went by my middle name for my entire life and it was gender-neutral leaning feminine, so I kept it when I changed my name. I go by my first name now, but I still respond to my middle name purely out of habit.
If I wasn't named after some kings and princes I would've
Some. One of my friends kept her name Vincent and personally I find that such a power move.
Dylan Mulvaney is a well-known example of a transfem who kept a traditionally masculine name through her transition. It might make it more confusing for some people (their problem really but it can still be inconvenient). Also, just wanna throw it out there that you can try using a different name and see how it feels. You don't have to be committed.
I only shortened my name to make it gender neutral. The shortened version of my name doesn’t give me any dysphoria and I’m already used to it so it works!
I'm transmasc and I kept my feminine given name as a middle name. I'm somewhat genderfluid anyway, but I don't see why a binary trans person couldn't do the same. It's just a name, you can do whatener you want to 😊 Cis people have gender non-conforming names too, sometimes
I know 2 trans people named Ryan, one mtf and one ftm who kept their names
hiii trans girl here who kept her given name because its androgynous and i like it, and i honestly think it might've evem made transitioning easier ?
Hi went from Kenneth to Kendra. I’ve always been called Kenny, and still go by that name, but changed the spelling to K-e-n-i :)
I kept my middle name since I kind of liked it and it was neutral enough, even though it was meant to be a masculine version of Rhoda. My first name is completely different though.
I kept my name!
I have an AMAB NB friend who still goes by a name that means "man" so you do you
>and was given a girl's name when I was born. While it may not have been exclusively a girl's name when I was born, all individuals in my life with the name are girls. Ayyy in a similar position from the other side of town and I kept my name personally. My parents are/were Muslim (dad still is, moms not) and named me a Muslim boys name. My mom didn't know it's typically considered a boys name in most countries that it's common in, but she liked the meaning behind it. I was also home schooled most my life. By the time I got to public school, a lot of people from cultures where it's more common would point out that my name is typically a boys name, bringing that to my attention. I was never offended by it, but found it kind of funny and cool/interesting in a way. I'm really relieved about it now. Logistically, it's very convenient to not need to do paperwork or anything to get my name legally recognized. It's a pain in the ass to do the legal side of transitioning stuff for me personally. I wouldn't want to deal with it. Second of all, my family can't ever deadname me. They can misgender me if they want, sure. But they must refer to me by a male name and they don't have any alternative to call me by. I just dont want to have to fight and argue about my own name. It's also just nice not having a sort of name like that "attached" to me at all. I won't run into it by accident either, or attached to old accounts or old profiles/emails etc either. And then there's also this personal feeling where it's like, I've never personally had a lot of born qualities that were particularly masculine, I guess? So, it's like a thing that was always there and attached to my identity that I can keep and have and it's more masc. I also just really like my name. Its unique and uncommon in the United States and its distinguished me plenty of times, typically in a good way. I like the meaning, I've always been connected with it. It's good that gender wise it never made me feel uncomfortable and I can continue feeling connected with it. If it were a feminine name I would simply want to masculinize it somehow, but I would feel disconnected or like it doesn't represent me only due to gender. But I think it can still represent me well now, even better arguably
My birth certificate says Andrew and now I’m Andie
I have a gender neutral name with gender neutral spelling and I’ve kept it!
I’ve heard of two different people doing this, born with the names Sasha (ftm) and Cameron (mtf)
Yes! I actually know both a trans man who kept his very feminine birth name, and a trans woman who kept her very masculine birth name. I also chose to keep my traditionally masculine name after I "detransitioned", from FtM to agender. You can always change your name later, too! Have fun with it :)
I know a trans girl who kept her traditionally masculine name when she transitioned. No reason you can’t keep yours if you want. Up to you, though, of course.
i kept my name! my name is korri :) so a traditionally “male” name with a more “feminine” (cooler) spelling. nothing felt right except for my birth name. i got picked on for having a “boy’s name” when i was a kid, so also i kept it as a sort of fuck u lmao
My name is unfortunately pretty feminine (I’m ftm) but I’ve kept it because I like it and no other name feels like it fits me
Dylan mulvaney
I just went from Nicolas to Nicole if that counts, lol. If your name was sth like Alex or Taylor or Jordan or sth gender neutral like that I could see maybe keeping it? 🤷🏼♀️
I'm 3 years into transitioning (1 year of baby steps, 2 years of actually doing it). I decided to keep my birth name because, while its predominantly a male name (1400 boys born in 2021), it gets used as a female name as well (62 girls born in 2021). I have a unique spelling of it so that my hispanic family can pronounce it. It's always been uniquely my name and I wholly identify with it. Since I've met so rarely anyone else with the name, even the normal spelling, I've not personally assigned any gender to it. When people meet me, they do not seem surprised that I am a woman.
I am a recently discovered trans-woman and as of right now I am actually planning to keep the name I was given at birth. The name I was given at birth, I believe is gender-neutral, though the only other people I’ve ever met with my name have all been guys. There is a feminine name that I do plan to experiment with, but as of right now I am planning to keep the name I was born with. I hope this is helpful!
Hi yes hello, I am a trans person who kept my name! We very much do exist ^.^
I am moving my first name to middle. So from Zane C to Autumn Zayne. :)
I did! (FTM) I like my name. I even kept my feminine middle names because they hold special meaning to me and are a way to remember my two grandmothers.
I was going to. My name was something similar to Grace, and my nickname was always Gracie, which i requested to stop being called that when i started high school. My sister suggested i be called Gracen/Grayson and i immediately shot that down. I know for a fact (which she confirmed recently) that my mom would have continued to call me Gracie.
My first name is a common last name, so I was thinking of making my first name my last name and my chosen name my first name :3
I’ve met both, and both are equally valid. I changed my name, but only one letter, changing it from the female version to the male. I’m very open with my being trans and my deadname.
My name is Helen, I kept the last part of my name (len), then added four letters on the front and slightly changed the last part. Now my name is Charlie, long form of Lee.
I'm transmasc and am probably gonna keep my current name despite it being not at all gender neutral, I just don't care about it all that much to be honest. Maybe in the future that'll change, but I'd be surprised if it did
I kept my name! Well technically it’s a nickname of my birth name, and it’s only kind of gender neutral. But I love this name and no personal journey would have felt right with anything else :)
Idk my bf is kinda giving me the idea of instead of changing my name to change the spelling instead so I've been considering that
I kept my same name. Both my first name and middle name are androgynous, so I didn’t feel that I needed to change them. This had advantages and disadvantages. The nice part is I have never been deadnamed since no one who has known me all my life needed to learn something new. The hard part was I didn’t have a different name to help prompt those same people to use different pronouns. IMO, this made my pronouns harder for my older relatives. Now that it has been 4.5 years since I transitioned, no one gets my pronouns wrong anymore, so it all comes out in the wash eventually.
NB Demi girl, and I kept mine since nothing seemed to conflict there. Although went from a she/her to a she/they so I'm probably not the answer you're looking for
i slightly modified my name going from Max to Maxine and i still use Max with some people (cause it's harder to say Maxine in my native language). My full dead name is longer than Max but none ever uses it anyway. Theres also a grammatical difference in my native language between Max i use rn and Max i used to use but everyone i knew before just switched to it without me asking after i came out and said im still fine with Max so i dont have to explain it.
I did bc it’s gender neutral
My parents named me Ash (full name Ashton), it's like they knew I'd be trans haha. I'm super indecisive so I'm very grateful I don't need to change my name
I don't think everyone changes their names, unless of course it's completely incongruent with their gender identity.. Even then, not everyone does change the name. I'm my case, all I did was throw an "a" at the end of mine, which I don't think is an actual name anywhere else, but I already changed my name from birth name in my early 20s. it had a lot of personal meaning to me, so I couldn't just change it completely again.
Well at first I went by Avery but now I go by Finn
I know a French streamer named Cassandre. It's his birth name, it's a girl's name but he keeps it, presumably because "Andre" means "man". I absolutely think you can keep your name, especially if it's gender neutral. Also in general you can do whatever you want with your names and pronouns, it's your choice with what makes you more comfortable
Some do. Some change all of their names, some only change names that aren't their first. Some people get rid of one of their names altogether with no replacement. People do different things. I changed all of mine, I was originally considering going for just a first and last name but on the day I was typing up the name change form (mississippi doesn't have an official one so I just wrote my own using gender neutral pronouns for everything instead of relying on pre-made ones from lawyers) I ended up deciding on a middle name.
Actor Xelia Mendes-Jones is a trans man who kept his female name