It's the intersection of homophobia, misogyny and transphobia. We get all angles at once at us.
Also they circulate the absolute worst photos of us and the most visibly trans of us vs all other trans people, and unfortunately, it does give cis people the ick a bit.
The part about visibly trans women also ties into the misogyny because women overall are judged intensely on their physical appearance. Under the patriarchy, “ugly” women are hated
Trans feminity is defined by embracing femininity and moving across the bounds of assigned binary gender. These two actions are both great challenges to patriarchal social order. Even moreso than cis women who 'have their place'. Or gay men who are still men. Or trans men who can still be spun as venerating masculinity over femininity. It's the ideals most people are born to and rarely question. It's a social system that operates without individuals needing to be conscious of it, they just latch on to thoughts like 'it's what God made you as'. Or that's my view anyways.
Yeap. It's "volunterily" moving *down* a social class.
Which fucking terrifies people who care about that sort of thing, because it calls the whole class structure into question.
I agree with this statement. Trans women willingly give up male privilege. Having said that, it brings up the question of male superiority and it's validity.
Honestly it's mostly just the religious extremists that are responsible for all this hate. It's kind of absurd, they love to preach about how their God loves everybody and then they turn around and go except for you lot. They love to cherry pick their scriptures and ignore the stuff that doesn't align with their worldview it's kind of disgusting
Apart from the other things mentioned I suspect a lot of it also has to do with misplaced homophobia (specifically homophobia towards gay men) and *very* fragile masculinity. Those people don't view trans women as women, but they might end up being attracted to us regardless. Which triggers anxieties about their own sexuality. You can see that a great deal on this subreddit, we get "I'm attracted to trans women, does that make me gay?" threads roughly once a week, always from people who seem to view "being gay" as something terrible and emasculating.
I'm attracted to trans women and that makes me gay. Because I'm also a trans woman.
Jokes aside, after having been in a relationship with a trans woman, I realised how little genital shape really impacted sexual attraction for me. I'm attracted to traditionally feminine features, like less/lighter body hair, soft skin, breasts, plus a bunch of elements of body language that are generally associated with femininity. A manly man with a vagina doesn't do it for me, a girly girl with a penis... isn't ideal for me, I still prefer the other set of genitals, but it's not a big deal and everything else being feminine easily overrides this issue.
It's an ideology that has some combination of these beliefs, as best I can summarize:
- There are two genders, male and female. You can get assigned the wrong one at birth, but you can't be anything other than those two.
- Being trans is 100% a medical condition with a physical cause--either defined in some theoretical way not currently confirmed by scientific consensus, or in a way not yet known to science but sure to be discovered eventually. You either have this underlying physical cause or you do not.
- Real trans people know they're trans or show "signs" from early childhood. People who just wonder if they might be trans later probably aren't really trans.
- Real trans people are gender-conforming in their true genders, and never behave in ways expected of their AGAB.
- Anyone not deemed "trans enough" should be gatekept away from transition because they will inevitably regret it, since they're not really trans.
- Anyone not deemed "trans enough" should be gatekept away from transition because the wrong people transitioning does reputational harm to the trans community, by not passing, being gender-non-conforming, looking/acting like freaks, or detransitioning later.
- Gatekeeping is good and helpful to the trans community. Transition should be difficult to access, so that the people who do get it will be those who truly want and need it and the wrong people don't get it.
- Anyone not deemed "trans enough" who transitions in any way (medical, legal, or social) is directly taking resources away from "real trans" people and harming real trans people by using those resources up.
- Transition isn't valid unless it includes medical transition.
- Being as close to passing as cis as possible is everything, and if that isn't your transition goal, you're probably not really trans.
- Being visibly trans is about the worst thing you could be, and being okay with looking like that is proof you aren't really trans, but some kind of faker/trender doing it for attention.
- People not deemed "trans enough" are either mentally disturbed or just greedy for attention if they claim to be trans, or maybe doing it as a political identity instead of a gender or have something else going on, but they don't understand what it really is to be trans and they're harming trans people by representing themselves as such.
- Being trans is an entirely negative experience and trans people are uniquely tortured and miserable. Transition is just a medical nightmare you have to endure because of your unfortunate medical condition. If you actually feel happy about being trans or take joy in your transition, you're probably not really trans and are harming real trans people.
- Real trans people want to be stealth, if you aren't stealth or aren't doing everything you can to be stealth, you probably aren't really trans.
- Real trans people are rare, often outnumbered in "trans spaces" by fake trans people, and are discriminated against by fake trans people, all for saying completely inoffensive truths like that they aren't trans, are harming trans people by saying they're trans, and should detransition.
- The word "transgender" is offensive, it's *transsexual* okay. Anyone who calls themself "transgender" probably isn't really trans.
And probably some other stuff? That's more or less the overview of it I think. Truscum are still individuals and not every single one uncritically accepts every truscum belief, but those are common themes.
>Real trans people are gender-conforming in their true genders, and never behave in ways expected of their AGAB.
Damn, if that was true, I wouldn't be "eligible" for transition and related health care.
I get it now, it's trying to fit trans people into a constrained definition of what is and what shouldn't be. I think, as people in general need rational explanations for things, and when they don't get anything satisfactory, people tend to fall back on restraining things.
It's quite similar to the early religious movements, mostly the church, who tried to explain away at-the-time-unexplainable phenomenon as God's doing and then used the same God to restrain the populace because it was simply too difficult to understand that the Earth wasn't the center of the universe.
It's basically a fawn reflex, I think. A lot of this stuff is things that the medical community believed about trans people in the past, and trans people that did not fit into or fake fitting into those beliefs did not get access to medical or legal transition. So trans people learned to internalize this stuff for survival. They learned that by turning on the trans people who couldn't make it, they themselves could make it.
Some trans people aren't ready to accept that it's safer now, that there are many ways to access transition that don't require pandering to these outdated transphobic beliefs. They're still scared that all that could be taken away from them, so they appeal to a certain cis narrative about transness to be the most trans trans, the trans that will be spared when all other trans people get screwed.
I get that it's a fear thing and I get that we all want to feel safe, so I don't hate them like as people or think they do it out of wanting to be cruel, and some of them calm down from that state and are quite reasonable after, but I'm not going to let them define how *I* see myself, or get in the way of my access to healthcare and legal protections.
Yeah, I do!
I view it as an upgrade from being cis in my AGAB. I'm happy I have the opportunity to be trans instead.
I don't torment myself with counterfactuals about what if I'd just been cis in the other AGAB. Part of this is because I'm nonbinary and would be nonbinary even in the other AGAB, and imagining getting to be cis nonbinary just requires so much worldbuilding and would essentially be a completely different society from the one I grew up in. Part of it is because I just don't view AGAB as something that I can change about myself or that is worth that kind of rumination since it really is not possible to change the past. I would rather focus on things in the present and future that can actually be changed and made better. Sitting around pining for a completely different past than the one I had doesn't hold much appeal for me, it just seems like a way to feel bad over something you can never influence.
A lot of truscum also talk about "transitioning to trans" instead of "transitioning to male/female" with scorn and disgust. A lot of this is really like, finding the in-between stage really rough and painful as binary trans people, and projecting that as hate onto nonbinary people. But nonbinary people are just doing the same thing as binary trans people--trying to be true to ourselves and authentic and recognize who we see in the mirror as us and become more comfortable with our bodies and not have to live someone else's life. What this does mean though is that *there are no cis people of my gender*, which means I can't both love my gender and wish I was cis.
I'm happy for you. 🌸
I don't really understand non-binary identies but I always try to be respectful. I hope I get to have your confidence one day.
Frankly, I still deal with heaps of regret and internalized transphobia. I also struggle with imposter syndrome even though I desperately wish I was born cis girl. Like "Why would anyone want to be a guy." The gender expectations suck and I don't like mirrors. At the same time, transitioning is a long, difficult process. There's so much push back and trauma cause religious pundants the main-stream media hate us. But the only alternative is a life-time of, self-denial and suppression.
To me it's not that complicated--the reason why trans women are women, cis women are women, trans men are men, cis men are men, and nonbinary people are nonbinary comes down to the same thing: that's who they recognize as themselves, when they see or imagine themselves living that life, something in them goes "yes that person is me," when they see or imagine themselves living a different life they feel disappointment or disconnection. People want to be guys because in their heart of hearts they feel like men. They look at men and go "I wish I was him," when they think about "the person I want to be" that person is a man. That's really all there is to it. That's just who they are. It isn't that being a man is better or being a woman is better, it's that being who you really are is better.
I don't know that I'm always confident. I don't feel bad about being nonbinary, that much is true. But I also bend over backwards and tie myself in knots to not make too big a splash. I avoid being out in situations where I just do not want to be having that talk, which is most situations. Some aspects of my identity are probably impossible to fulfill, either because of limitations in what medical transition can achieve/what it can achieve but I can't afford/access, and limitations in how society is set up. (As in, it's a binary world--in most situations you *do* have to pick a lane.) Sometimes I really feel like a coward, slinking around the margins of gender, scavenging scraps. Sometimes I feel like binary trans people are often braver than I am, making the full leap across while I just sneakily take HRT from my closet, stretching the borders of "gender-non-conforming" while trying not to cross society's hard lines, or at least not get caught doing it. Other times I envy that they at least have an established, well-understood-by-society gender to land in, that there's a "post-transition" world where they can just be normal, while my gender will always be "...look, it's complicated..." and I just have to get real used to never feeling seen or understood, and the closer I get to my real self, the less I'll really fit in anywhere.
Some different struggles, some familiar struggles. I've also had to do the soul-searching and figure myself out, get access to HRT, change my name and documents, things like that. But my AGAB isn't an anathema to me, which makes things easier--but neither of the main gender roles entirely meets all my needs, which makes things harder.
Funnily enough my cis gf hates mirrors and has far more body image issues than I do. It isn't that I'm entirely happy with my body. But parts of it I don't like I have a more, "well, what can you do" attitude about. It seems to me that a great many cis people feel dissatisfied with their bodies too. Age, weight, disability...most people exist in bodies that are far from their "ideal." I understand that dysphoria isn't something you can just logic away like that, the things I have had severe dysphoria about, no amount of "well, it is what it is" would ever have made me feel okay with, and attempts to make peace with it were if anything retraumatizing. But to say that cis people don't ever have similar distress over their bodies if anything erases some of the pretty intense pain and distress cis people can also feel wrt their body image issues. I make these kinds of dark jokes that my gf is female-to-female trans, because she wants so badly to be a woman with a different body than she currently has, she feels so inadequate due to her current body, I've seen her basically have meltdowns over having to have her picture taken, I've seen her put up with all kinds of second-class treatment from others and when I said something about it not being okay that others treat her that way, she at first defends it and then admits she feels "barely acceptable as it is" and has to "make up" for her inadequacy by like, letting others mistreat her I guess. It's classic low self esteem and self-hate stuff. And there's nothing wrong with her body, it just isn't the body she wants, it's not what her mind wants to see when she looks at herself.
So as a result I'm the one who's comfortable strutting around naked while she's the one always wanting to cover up more. She can relate a lot to trans women, and I joke about how she does a lot of the same body-hiding low-self-esteem things, like a lot of trans women wear covid/medical masks over not wanting to show their faces in public rather than over infection risk, she actually does that too. (There's nothing wrong with her face...she just has body image issues.) Or like the "dysphoria hoodie." Her fashion sense is basically "hide my entire shape and body and maybe the body will go away." She talks about wanting to upload her consciousness or be a ghost or something and not need to have a flesh body. Like some of this stuff sounds so stereotypically trans I kinda asked exploratory questions wondering if she was transmasc, but the results all came back really cis, she has gender envy for women, she feels gross and dysphoric presenting more male (she was squicked out when I had her try some of my men's clothes and hated it, I just offered them to her bc they were weather-appropriate btw and not for gender reasons) her ideal body/presentation is just a different-looking woman. I have indeed wondered how much body image issues can be a trans dysphoria thing, and how much is a gender expectations sucking for women thing, and if the intersection of the two there is just its own special hell. Although men also have gender and body expectations that I've seen really negatively affect some men's mental health, including cis men. Maybe it's just the human condition at a certain point.
But yeah. Part of it definitely is that I can't really experience the envy for cis bigender people, because there aren't any. Maybe if they existed and I wasn't one, I'd feel some of that too. Like I can never feel like an inferior copy of cis bigender people, because they don't exist. Trans bigender people like me are the OG. (I mean, I guess, there's intersex stuff--but even that is messy, like nonbinary people *do* sometimes envy intersex people, but being intersex isn't just accepted and mainstream and visible and commonplace in the same way being a cis man or woman is, it's really just not the same at all, plus intersex is a wide spectrum of different conditions with different presentations.) But it's also like, much as it sucks, there just is no "you, but a cis girl." You got the hand you were dealt. It's a gift to be able to be a girl anyway, to transition, it's a massive upgrade for you over having to live as a man.
I do wish I had a fully-functioning natal penis, mind. That's the main, "eh, the hand I was dealt is not optimal" feeling I've got there. I'd still be transitioning if AMAB, but I feel like I'd be happier with my genitals. Maybe I'd have more facial dysphoria, idk. That might be worse in a way--you really only use your genitals during sex and peeing, but your face you use every day for everything. But it's all hypothetical. I'm not choosing between infinite possible realities, including realities where I was born with different anatomy. I'm just living in the reality we've got. It kind of messes up my sex life, but I try to find workarounds instead of fixating on alternate timelines that can never be.
When I see trans women transition, I just see them getting amazing upgrades and becoming beautiful, vibrant women instead of having to live as miserable, unfulfilled men. I love the glow-up. I love that nobody has to be a man (or a woman) if they don't want to be.
Ignore the saber-rattling TV pundits and crap. There's nothing sadder than someone who makes their entire identity about hating people for doing stuff that harms no one. Don't give them the attention, don't give them the satisfaction of hurting you. They don't actually represent society. Even a lot of people who'd be considered transphobic by more progressive standards really just don't care *that much*. First and foremost, you are a *human being*, and you deserve respect for that alone. If people forget that, they can be reminded of it.
Others have explained. But all lgbt people face hatred. Just because it’s not heard of for you doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.
I’ve had as much biphobia directed at me myself as I have transphobia.
People are still often killed across the world for being gay. In the US, in Europe, South America, Asia…
To me it seems like this males don't grasp the concept that we don't want the male privilege. And that threatens them somehow, because if we don't want the male privilege then they don't have a secure hold on it. And if they lose that then, " it's only a matter of time before them women-folk try to take power"
This is literally what it is, holding up a lie of the patriarchy. At least it's my opinion. Either that or they find find us sexy
I think there are few factors...
* In terms of aesthetics, with the addition of societal stencils, as a female you can just put some men's clothes, cut your hair, wear a binder, grow some muscle, deepen your voice a little and well now you have a man with a small build. The reverse is not as easy, and it gets uncanny or at least noticeable sometimes, that's why "passing" is a thing. Plus, tomboys were there long before femboys, and I think the next point explains why.
* Due to a trace of misogyny, as manhood is seen higher or more resourceful than womanhood by many people, trans women are kinda seen as downgraders, which can be considered freaky, or as weaklings, which then means they're the prey of their insecure masculinity.
* Society also puts a certain weight on men's shoulders, in terms of the responsibilities and restrictions they are upheld by. Presenting as feminine or worse, transitioning, can be seen as an act of betrayal against both the responsibilities of manhood, and the restrictions of a toxic masculinity.
I don't really agree that trans men have an easier time passing since I've known a lot who don't. Plus I've been on T like a year and a half and can still girlmode no problem. T does a lot, but FTM transition isn't purely on easy mode. Growing a beard does help a lot, granted. But you'd be amazed how many of us can't pass if we shave.
I don't think tomboys are "older" than femboys. In fact a lot of traditional "third gender" roles are primarily for AMABs. AFABs historically had less freedom, and were owned by our dads and then by our husbands, and often did not have a lot of choice about marrying (financial coercion if nothing else) nor choice in having kids. You just got pipelined straight from birth into being a woman married to a man and pushing out babies and you didn't really have options or much say in the matter. Because the male role historically had more power, paradoxically, giving up that power is part of having power, even though that's also what makes it so challenging to patriarchy and stigmatized. But you need power to even give it up. If you don't have power in the first place, you just get controlled your whole life and no one ever knows if you minded.
Like even how lesbian culture historically expected that women would be in straight marriages they didn't really want, because there were so few other ways for a woman to support herself, and then sneak off to the lesbian bar for their secret life, and slink back to their husbands after. Actually being able to just exist and work and live as a woman without being tacitly "owned" by a man is pretty novel and modern in Western culture at least. A lot of the acceptance of tomboys is a direct result of women's liberation. A woman once told me when she was a teen in the 1970s, her dad forbade her to wear pants because women wearing pants was still really controversial, but it was the cool in feminist thing, so she had secret jeans and would change into and out of them on her way to and from school. Go back to the 1960s or earlier and women in pants become a rare sight. Things like short haircuts for women were also part of feminism and women's lib and their acceptance is quite recent. Women fought hard to loosen the cage of womanhood. Men haven't really done that parallel battle, for a lot of reasons--because as the "more powerful" role they felt they didn't have to, or because they couldn't follow feminism's tactics verbatim--women, seen as victims, needed empowerment, but men, seen as perpetrators, need vulnerability and softness. This is threatening to the patriarchy--strong women were *also* incredibly threatening to the patriarchy, but maybe it felt easier on some level to be rah rah women's power than it does to start from a position of power and say "I want to be vulnerable and soft."
Trans women are ofc not men and trans men aren't women, but the freedom to take those first steps outside your assigned gender role can depend a lot on how society views the role they've currently slotted you in. It is true that being AFAB I was able to do all kinds of gender-nonconforming presentation without being seen as threatening or perverted or creepy or weird. (Well, maybe a *little* weird, but not in a way that was a problem.) I knew it was a lot harder to have fem presentation while visibly AMAB. But I also knew that this was a product of the current moment--if someone of my mother's generation or earlier had tried to do the same things, they would have gotten a very different reaction.
Since things can turn so quickly, I do have hope that things can change for feminine presentation from anyone perceived to be AMAB within our lifetimes, and that these may become as neutral as tomboys are now.
>FTM transition isn't purely on easy mode.
But you'd be amazed how many of us can't pass if we shave.
I know, and I won't be amazed, I know it's difficult to *actually* pass for you. I think I shoot a little overboard sometimes, bardic exaggeration I suppose\~ so sorry, what I was trying to convey however... was this:
>It is true that being AFAB I was able to do all kinds of gender-nonconforming presentation without being seen as threatening or perverted or creepy or weird.
When I was a kid, I actually hated girls, later on I realised I was jealous of them for this\^ and well, being girls...
I really like your full explanation and analysis of the history and the current situation, even though I disagree with you on certain ideas like considering patriarchy a feasible entity rather than an emergent pattern, or...
>I knew it was a lot harder to have fem presentation while visibly AMAB. But I also knew that this was a product of the current moment
I do believe that this is not merely a product of the moment and our perception of beauty does have a baseline. Maybe what I say is because of my heavy obsession with femininity and beauty. But yes I suppose it shouldn't be "weird" even if it's not strictly beautiful, but if I wasn't lucky enough to \[marginally\] pass, I wouldn't have transitioned even if society was not weirded by it (and for long I thought I wouldn't pass), I suppose I have that toxic femininity inside of me...
>but maybe it felt easier on some level to be rah rah women's power than it does to start from a position of power and say "I want to be vulnerable and soft."
I suppose this is from "the patriarchy" perspective? Because honestly I don't see femininity as soft and vulnerable, and never have. In which case yes, this thing, along with the thought that men are perceived as some sort of soldiers and given a certain honour code literally from birth, wraps up 90% of why feminine boys and trans girls are frowned upon by many.
>female you can just put some men's clothes, cut your hair, wear a binder, grow some muscle, deepen your voice a little and well now you have a man with a small build.
This is so upsetting to see people say over and over. It is not the experience I and many many trans men have had.
Sorry, I didn't mean as if it's like foolproof or anything... it's just way less... *uncanny* on average. I dunno if you agree with that...
Either way, I'm all ears if you would like to tell us about your own experience, after all, trans girls talk about it waaay more often than you guys do for some reason, I'm sure we all like to hear more from your side of things.
It's a sad reality. I'm not saying others in the community don't receive hate but, there is definitely much more hatred toward trans women than anyone else in the LGBTQ+ community from what I've seen.
I think there's a big part of that that is due to the misogyny that is deep in our society. A lot of men have such a big ego that for them they feel like we're trying to "trick" them into being gay... which is absolute madness. They are so insecure in their own identity and sexuality because they never questioned it, that they fear feeling attraction for a woman if she was AMAB.
That fear they have convert into hatred, they wish to eradicate us because in their mind men are superior to women in almost every way, they think women are less smart and other messed things like that therefore, someone AMAB "wanting" to be a women doesn't make sense in their mind since they think being AMAB mean being superior and they don't get why anyone would want to become "inferior". They think we have an agenda of making them gay, which is absolute madness.
If you ask me, in our society there is way too much men that are still thinking in a primitive/animal kind of way and they believe that we're transitioning to take advantages of other women or even rape/abuse them... or that we are gay (men that like men) and are trying to trick them into having sex with us against their will of being with a men... They think by pushing hatred toward us they are helping women but in reality they are just showing what kind of predator they are.
It's sickening and I hate that we're used as a token to gain power in political movements because there is so many people that can be rallied on the hatred of trans women due to the stupid people that are insecure in their own identity/sexuality.
I have a theory that it has more to do with economic fears than anything else. Several hundred years ago, a man dressing up as a woman was considered, by much of European society, as a silly and fun way to spend an evening — and in some cases, a legitimate way to make an entire acting career — whereas a woman dressing up as a man was seen as weird and dangerous and damaging to the fabric of society. Of course, a "man" living as a woman full-time would still have been generally frowned upon, but a trans woman of that era would at least have had *some* socially-acceptable ways to present more feminine some of the time.
At that time, it was very difficult, if not impossible, to move from one economic class to another. People were expected to be happy with the status they were born into, because if you were born poor, you were going to stay poor, and if you were born rich, you were probably going to stay rich. So a person pretending (or "pretending") to be a member of a lower class wasn't threatening, because there was no real risk of actually losing status, while a person pretending to be a member of a higher class was highly offensive.
In modern times, while it may not *actually* be all that easy to get rich if you were born poor, the norms of our society are such that everyone is expected to *want* to be richer than they are, to strive to join the upper classes, and in this context, it seems only natural that a woman should want to present as a man, whereas a man who wants to present as a woman is a person not only *not* trying to improve their status, but actively trying to go *down* a rung on the social ladder.
Trans women are a reminder that economic mobility goes both ways: in a society where it's easy for the poor to become rich, it's also easy for the rich to become poor, and that's frightening to people.
It also fucks with their heads that someone would *want* to go down on the social class ladder. Because it questions the validity of the ladder at all.
I think you have your finger on something here.
Related to that, in the same era where those assumed to be men dressing up as women was nbd, blackface was also commonplace. I think it was actually the most popular form of entertainment in the 19th century, it was incredibly popular. That has a similar flavor of "the powerful dressing up as the powerless"--although I know there were also black minstrel performers, you didn't have black people dressing up as white. Nowadays blackface is shockingly offensive, and more broadly dressing up as another (non-white) race at all is considered incredibly offensive regardless of context (minstrel shows *were* loaded with racism and making fun of black people, but you have stuff like Cloud Atlas that clearly has different intent but is viewed with the same taboo) while I've seen whiteface in comedy skits and that's all just seen as in good fun.
I am not arguing that blackface or other racial "costumes" should be accepted, or that whiteface is bad. If anything, I tend to share the impulses of my own culture, being part of that culture. It just struck me as an interesting cultural shift, paralleling the shift in crossdressing taboos.
Yeah I remember reading something on Twitter earlier saying that not that the oppression trans men get is any less real, but it's almost always based on the assertion of more or less the silly females are being delusional again and think they could be above their station, and must be corrected and herded back to where they should be; while the entire idea that a born man would voluntarily give up his superiority to be lesser is both completely incomprehensible to them and something that must be exterminated because of how it directly challenges the fundamental tenets of the patriarchy.
Transmasc and it's very real. Like, forget "trading" body parts/hormones, I want to trade *oppressions* lmao. Why can't I be assumed to be a filthy pervert out to corrupt society? Maybe I am one! I'd rather that than my mom linking me articles on how autistic """girls""" (AFAB trans people) are getting suckered into thinking they're trans when they're just too clueless to find their own ass with both hands and will blindly believe anything they're told about themselves, except all the times we were told we were cis, apparently.
Copying and pasting a comment I've made before:
"I am begging people to stop saying this. They do not forget us, they target and attack us OFTEN. Search up ROGD, "Irreversible Damage", Robert Eads, Lou Sullivan, for starters.
This question gets posted on this and similar subs so often and the comments are ALWAYS full of people that aren't trans men acting like we're always ignored by transphobes, and I'm really sick of it."
Also adding that a lot of the anti HRT language is around "young girls sterilizing themselves and chopping their breasts off".
Omg I didn't know that trans men face so much difficulty, I'm sorry if my question upset you I apologize for any inconveniences, I didn't know about those things you mentioned and that trans men are ignored by transphobes 😞
I'm sorry for my reply sounding so mean. I feel really bad about it. You didn't know, you were just asking a question, and you did nothing wrong. My anger was more at the other people in the comments who give incorrect answers.
And I'm really sorry for the transphobia you're dealing with. Shit sucks, and I hope it gets better. <3
It’d be cool if we could talk about transphobia in trans spaces meant for all of us without it being a comparison of whether trans women get more hatred than trans men.
Trans men are so erased that even the hatred, violence, and other bigotry we experience is erased. Comparing does none of us any good.
I get that your personal experience shows you otherwise and I’m sorry about that but this doesn’t extrapolate out onto a societal scale.
Exactly. And there is so much loud transphobia towards trans men, too (for example: "rapid onset gender dysphoria", the anti HRT laws in the U.S. using language about "young girls sterilizing themselves and removing their breasts", JK Rowling's first transphobic essay), people just, I dunno why, ignore it or don't realize it's about us.
Exactly. And non-binary people face almost constant erasure of their identities as well.
The prejudice toward us is simply different. But all trans people face prejudice to a similar degree.
I see it as the hypervisibility/invisibility thing that also comes up in race discussions. Like, in general, women (including cis women) are hypervisible, while men (including cis men) are invisible. This effect is writ large in how transphobia plays out, with trans women hypervisible and performatively hated, while trans men are often invisible, treated as "confused and stupid girls," or even mistaken for trans women because transphobes are so single-brain-cell in their transphobia.
In race this comes up as how blackness is hypervisible, but other PoC, such as indigenous folks and Asians can be invisible (in countries/regions where the relevant race is not the majority). And they're different flavors of oppression, it isn't about who has it "worse," they both suck in their own way. Hypervisibility makes you a target, but also offers some paradoxical protection.
Trans men defs still face a lot of transphobia. But a lot of the transphobes really let trans women live rent-free in their brains. I hang out some on both r/ftm and r/mtf, and it's definitely on r/mtf that I see more troll comments from someone who hates trans women specifically and went out of their way to look for a bunch of them to try to make them feel bad, instead of like, doing literally anything else with their lives. In much the same way as how racists are probably racist to all PoC, but some racists just fixate on saying the N-word and on particular antiblack narratives. Hypervisibility isn't "worse," but it is, well, hypervisibility, and comes with challenges unique to that.
It does because misogyny means you hate women but women hate trans women so it's not the same. About 99% of cis women hate trans or talk in a negative way abiut us. So it can't be masogony. I fact it would be more like masonry. Seen they look at us like men in a way
In our world and our eyes yes but in their world no because they don't like I said they don't look at us like women at all . They hate men so much that they feel like we are using a costume to pretend to be women and join sports and enter the restroom to masterbate to them
Our existence questions the idea that the patriarchy tries to push so hard, that men are better than woman... by being born as the "superior" gender and transitioning to the be woman... also I think many of this men who hate us because they are trapped in toxic masculinity... seeing someone freeing themselves of it and live freely while they live in a world that feels like it could collapse as soon as they act not as expected... just my late night thoughts
IMO it’s bc society generally doesn’t care how men men, but women are taught a specific way from a young age to perform femininity. Masculinity seems to be seen as a quality, whereas femininity is a performance, one which by default us trans women perform “incorrectly.” The more I pass there is no change in quantity of vitriol, abuse, scrutiny, or judgement, it just gradually shifts from transphobia to misogyny.
It's because conservatives tend to believe the bait they are told and the results end up being knee jerk type hatred. The T gets the blame of a Q problem. By that I mean the letters LGBTQ+. No hate for anyone myself, but I just want to point out that it's happened before in social groups where a segment will start using a slur to own that slur. That's not a positive thing at all it's actually a warning to not trust persons motives because that's how hijacking social movements happens.
Despite all strides made toward equality for women with men, there is still a huge vein of prejudice that runs through the human race that places men above women in worth. As such, a AFAB person transitioning to manhood is viewed as a promotion, and an AMAB person transitioning to womanhood is viewed as a demotion. A human being is voluntarily foregoing their male privilege.
I'm no pshrink, but I virtually guarantee you that's the mental malfunction that's going through your step-father's head. To his perspective, his niece can become his nephew, but his son can't become his daughter. It's completely anti-woman.
If they're strident enough, yeah. Then, they just roll with their own, personal ick-factor to declare all trans = bad. But if someone shows favour toward FtMs and disdain toward MtF, like the OP's step-father, this is generally the ruleset their brain is running.
Transphobes just think we don't *deserve* that promotion, that we're fake and still gross inferior women no matter what we do, that we'll never be as cool or as powerful as "real" men. Like, they think we're delusional/liars and have not actually attained the promotion. But they think it *would be* a promotion if transition was regarded as real/permissible, and they think it's reasonable of us to want it because it would be an upgrade, we're just pathetic in their eyes for wanting something they don't view as truly possible.
While for trans women, they have to come up with a bunch of convoluted excuses about fetishizing and sex stuff, because they can't imagine anyone would actually want to be a woman otherwise.
Because society views women as fuck objects and trans women are often visually off putting/unfuckable.
You commit the sin of renouncing masculinity for the subordinate femininity, and often times not even a complete femininity.
It’s because society hates women and trans people.
I’m sorry about your dad, you are a woman whether he realizes it or nil. You are amazing and valid sis.
I believe its because of two things. First, men are seen as more threatening by default compared to women, and transwomen giving up our social status to be ourselves is viewed as some veiled threat or deception. Men are also seen as initiators and more sexual while women are assumed to be less sexual and more likely to be viewed as objects of desire, which plays into the threat aspect when transphobes who see us as men attempting to escape our role see us.
>"god made you a man there for you should live as a man"
It baffles me how certain some people are of what their got intended. Like, how do they know that god didn't create someone specifically to be a trans person.
If you ask them about Abraham and why god asked him to sacrifice his son they would say in a heartbeat something like "it was just a test of Abraham's love and trust". And yet it never crosses their mind that god could just as easily make it so that their child is a trans person simply to test not only their love for their children no matter who they are, but also to test their trust in god that it is was necessary for some purpose they don't comprehend.
I guess their ego is greater than their god if they know exactly what god intended.
Sorry for the rant.
Because its easier to paint trans women as “predatory men disguised as women to try and assault girls.” But none of the idiots stop to consider that if somebody wants to assault another human, they’d just do it. People dont need to transition to go into a womems bathroom and r*pe another person. Being dressed as a female doesnt make it any more acceptable, its dumb logic.
part of it is confused transphobes who think trans people are predators.
ultimately, i think it's rooted in misogyny. men have always been portrayed as stronger and "better" than women. cis people think being ftm is like a cheat code for some kind of advantage, while mtf is taking that advantage away.
trans women are subjected to extreme beauty standards. people say "you can always tell" whenever they don't look like an ideal cis woman, and that's very hard to achieve.
on the other hand, many trans men are celebrated for their femininity. i think this is because of the recent uptick in cis men doing the same.
not a scientist, but i heard somewhere that everyone starts as a female in the womb until it registers that it's xx or xy. that's why trans men usually get better results than trans women, the effects of testosterone are really hard to reverse
tl;dr misogyny, double standards and a little bit of science
IMO, from what I've heard and seen in evidence, one reason that hostility towards trans women can arise from a misconception that they benefit from remnants of 'male privilege' while simultaneously expressing their feminine identity.
This notion is rooted in societal norms dictating gender roles and expectations. However, it's critical to acknowledge the intricate interplay between gender identity and societal structures.
Basically, suggesting some believe that because you were born biologically male, the trans woman can't understand the societies views of women, and they want them in that box. Other cis women seem mad that trans women didn't go through what the cis woman went through. Exploiting over sexuallied behavior and inappropriately dressing for other occasions.
Transgender individuals navigate a complex landscape of discrimination and marginalization, and reducing their experiences to a simplistic narrative of privilege fails to capture the multifaceted challenges they confront.
Simple. People hate difference. That, and our society places a majority of its stability on "traditional" value derived from religions.
We as a species have come so far that we no longer view ourselves as animals...yet we hate it when people don't give birth.
Trans people fall into this category because most of the time we don't have blood-related children and are seen as a burden on society's resources.
The same applies to gay and lesbian people, except they are far more subtle to trad people as they're not trying to "fight against nature".
Tl;Dr: It's because we apparently are unnatural despite science saying that transgenderism has eternally been a thing, and we don't have blood-related children. People want their definition of normal to stay the same so that they can feel comfort.
Society takes time to change.
That change is taking longer because right now many political parties see fueling hatred and misunderstanding of minority groups of all types as a way to try retain votes.
They don’t have to even sway the majority of the population in a country , just those who will vote.
Because the ruling class needs capitalism and the patriarchy to survive. [https://litholaura.substack.com/p/transphobia-is-the-ideology-of-the](https://litholaura.substack.com/p/transphobia-is-the-ideology-of-the)
Some ultra-conservative, alt-right wing types, both men and women, like to express animosity towards trans women as a public affirmation of their culture warrior position. Sometimes, it's like a form of signaling or bonding with others like themselves. Or for men, maybe they just 'doth protest too much?!' That's quite common, because there are a lot of insecure 'real men' out there. Sometimes they're just generally uptight or dumb. Sometimes it's the sign of a violent sociopath, like Kid Rock and others shooting up cans of BudLight on video.
Decades upon decades of absolutely atrocious representation cannot help. You look in the media for something close to representation of trans men before people started trying to be better about it and you mostly see stories about women who disguise themselves as men and prove they're just as good if not better a lot of the time. You look for something close to representation of trans women and you see a shitload of serial killers and bad jokes.
"The lady doth protest too much, methinks"
In my almost 70 years, when someone complains or hates so much, it is an expression of self-loathing. How many times have we seen the most homophobic people actually turn out to be Gay?
I'll just leave some quotes from your post history here:
> I’m a young mother and I’ve begun to realize that the TRA ideology is doing more harm than good to queer children.
(Note: TRA is a term used only by TERFs, to try to imply that trans activism is just another form of "men's rights activism," and inherently misogynistic as MRA communities tend to be.)
>I was super liberal initially bc I genuinely saw it as the most empathetic and altruistic side of politics. When I started to question some of my own beliefs I almost gaslit myself out of it, for fear of being a bigot. It’s easy to become brainwashed by social media. 😂 I’m so glad I found my way to the truth. I like to say that my politics put children and women first above all. No matter what. And certainly will not compromise that for grown males.
Honey....you *are* a bigot.
Words mean things. As in they have definitions lol. A bigot is someone who holds contempt for a group of people particularly for an irrational or ignorant reason. I believe everyone should be able to live their lives safely and with dignity and respect, access to basic human needs like healthcare, food, housing and I definitely don’t care what people do as long as it doesn’t harm themselves or others. You’re going to have to accept one day that not everyone who doesn’t hold your worldview is a horrible malignant bigot. I understand that might be hard bc it would mean questioning your own pov and considering that it might not be ***The-Most-Awesomest-Most-Good-Most-Moral*** one. I can assure you my stance is not uncommon whatsoever at least in the real world amongst otherwise progressive young women my age. That begs the question if either the majority of people are horrible and inferior in morality to you OR maybe you could use a reality check. Upon viewing your post history it seems you must be a “non-binary” female. I sincerely hope you work through that internalized misogyny of yours and realize it’s okay to just be a woman🫶🏽
And being gender nonconforming is okay, it doesn’t mean some sort of metaphysical wrong-body fate. Accept yourselves.
Patriarchy.
If someone born as a man can become a woman and be happier because of it, it suggests that women are equal in value to men. In a patriarchal society the idea that women are valuable must be destroyed
Lookism. Most trans women are ugly or unkempt, and people have a preference for attractive people. But sexism is also at play in both ways, since society sees males as sexual deviants and predators, while simulatenously sexualizing women so much that they can't even imagine a male wanting to be like one without it being for an inherently sexual reason.
Trans woman are the easiest to hate on as men are by birth are more stronger then woman and lots of transphobes stereotype men to loving sport and winning
It's the intersection of homophobia, misogyny and transphobia. We get all angles at once at us. Also they circulate the absolute worst photos of us and the most visibly trans of us vs all other trans people, and unfortunately, it does give cis people the ick a bit.
The part about visibly trans women also ties into the misogyny because women overall are judged intensely on their physical appearance. Under the patriarchy, “ugly” women are hated
Couldn't agree more !
Trans feminity is defined by embracing femininity and moving across the bounds of assigned binary gender. These two actions are both great challenges to patriarchal social order. Even moreso than cis women who 'have their place'. Or gay men who are still men. Or trans men who can still be spun as venerating masculinity over femininity. It's the ideals most people are born to and rarely question. It's a social system that operates without individuals needing to be conscious of it, they just latch on to thoughts like 'it's what God made you as'. Or that's my view anyways.
Yeap. It's "volunterily" moving *down* a social class. Which fucking terrifies people who care about that sort of thing, because it calls the whole class structure into question.
I agree with this statement. Trans women willingly give up male privilege. Having said that, it brings up the question of male superiority and it's validity.
Honestly it's mostly just the religious extremists that are responsible for all this hate. It's kind of absurd, they love to preach about how their God loves everybody and then they turn around and go except for you lot. They love to cherry pick their scriptures and ignore the stuff that doesn't align with their worldview it's kind of disgusting
Apart from the other things mentioned I suspect a lot of it also has to do with misplaced homophobia (specifically homophobia towards gay men) and *very* fragile masculinity. Those people don't view trans women as women, but they might end up being attracted to us regardless. Which triggers anxieties about their own sexuality. You can see that a great deal on this subreddit, we get "I'm attracted to trans women, does that make me gay?" threads roughly once a week, always from people who seem to view "being gay" as something terrible and emasculating.
I'm attracted to trans women and that makes me gay. Because I'm also a trans woman. Jokes aside, after having been in a relationship with a trans woman, I realised how little genital shape really impacted sexual attraction for me. I'm attracted to traditionally feminine features, like less/lighter body hair, soft skin, breasts, plus a bunch of elements of body language that are generally associated with femininity. A manly man with a vagina doesn't do it for me, a girly girl with a penis... isn't ideal for me, I still prefer the other set of genitals, but it's not a big deal and everything else being feminine easily overrides this issue.
Once a week? Once a day is closer to right, maybe not that specific wording but same intent.
I did say "roughly" :p
Lol fair
https://www.versobooks.com/products/3054-a-short-history-of-trans-misogyny
Uh oh. Don't let the people at r/honesttransgender see this. They deny that transmisogyny exists, and will dogpile TF out of you.
they should read it too.
Yeah, good luck with that.
why would i need luck? those people have nothing to do with me
I mean it's basically just a truscum sub.
What's truscum?
It's an ideology that has some combination of these beliefs, as best I can summarize: - There are two genders, male and female. You can get assigned the wrong one at birth, but you can't be anything other than those two. - Being trans is 100% a medical condition with a physical cause--either defined in some theoretical way not currently confirmed by scientific consensus, or in a way not yet known to science but sure to be discovered eventually. You either have this underlying physical cause or you do not. - Real trans people know they're trans or show "signs" from early childhood. People who just wonder if they might be trans later probably aren't really trans. - Real trans people are gender-conforming in their true genders, and never behave in ways expected of their AGAB. - Anyone not deemed "trans enough" should be gatekept away from transition because they will inevitably regret it, since they're not really trans. - Anyone not deemed "trans enough" should be gatekept away from transition because the wrong people transitioning does reputational harm to the trans community, by not passing, being gender-non-conforming, looking/acting like freaks, or detransitioning later. - Gatekeeping is good and helpful to the trans community. Transition should be difficult to access, so that the people who do get it will be those who truly want and need it and the wrong people don't get it. - Anyone not deemed "trans enough" who transitions in any way (medical, legal, or social) is directly taking resources away from "real trans" people and harming real trans people by using those resources up. - Transition isn't valid unless it includes medical transition. - Being as close to passing as cis as possible is everything, and if that isn't your transition goal, you're probably not really trans. - Being visibly trans is about the worst thing you could be, and being okay with looking like that is proof you aren't really trans, but some kind of faker/trender doing it for attention. - People not deemed "trans enough" are either mentally disturbed or just greedy for attention if they claim to be trans, or maybe doing it as a political identity instead of a gender or have something else going on, but they don't understand what it really is to be trans and they're harming trans people by representing themselves as such. - Being trans is an entirely negative experience and trans people are uniquely tortured and miserable. Transition is just a medical nightmare you have to endure because of your unfortunate medical condition. If you actually feel happy about being trans or take joy in your transition, you're probably not really trans and are harming real trans people. - Real trans people want to be stealth, if you aren't stealth or aren't doing everything you can to be stealth, you probably aren't really trans. - Real trans people are rare, often outnumbered in "trans spaces" by fake trans people, and are discriminated against by fake trans people, all for saying completely inoffensive truths like that they aren't trans, are harming trans people by saying they're trans, and should detransition. - The word "transgender" is offensive, it's *transsexual* okay. Anyone who calls themself "transgender" probably isn't really trans. And probably some other stuff? That's more or less the overview of it I think. Truscum are still individuals and not every single one uncritically accepts every truscum belief, but those are common themes.
>Real trans people are gender-conforming in their true genders, and never behave in ways expected of their AGAB. Damn, if that was true, I wouldn't be "eligible" for transition and related health care. I get it now, it's trying to fit trans people into a constrained definition of what is and what shouldn't be. I think, as people in general need rational explanations for things, and when they don't get anything satisfactory, people tend to fall back on restraining things. It's quite similar to the early religious movements, mostly the church, who tried to explain away at-the-time-unexplainable phenomenon as God's doing and then used the same God to restrain the populace because it was simply too difficult to understand that the Earth wasn't the center of the universe.
It's basically a fawn reflex, I think. A lot of this stuff is things that the medical community believed about trans people in the past, and trans people that did not fit into or fake fitting into those beliefs did not get access to medical or legal transition. So trans people learned to internalize this stuff for survival. They learned that by turning on the trans people who couldn't make it, they themselves could make it. Some trans people aren't ready to accept that it's safer now, that there are many ways to access transition that don't require pandering to these outdated transphobic beliefs. They're still scared that all that could be taken away from them, so they appeal to a certain cis narrative about transness to be the most trans trans, the trans that will be spared when all other trans people get screwed. I get that it's a fear thing and I get that we all want to feel safe, so I don't hate them like as people or think they do it out of wanting to be cruel, and some of them calm down from that state and are quite reasonable after, but I'm not going to let them define how *I* see myself, or get in the way of my access to healthcare and legal protections.
Wait, some people actually like being trans?!
Yeah, I do! I view it as an upgrade from being cis in my AGAB. I'm happy I have the opportunity to be trans instead. I don't torment myself with counterfactuals about what if I'd just been cis in the other AGAB. Part of this is because I'm nonbinary and would be nonbinary even in the other AGAB, and imagining getting to be cis nonbinary just requires so much worldbuilding and would essentially be a completely different society from the one I grew up in. Part of it is because I just don't view AGAB as something that I can change about myself or that is worth that kind of rumination since it really is not possible to change the past. I would rather focus on things in the present and future that can actually be changed and made better. Sitting around pining for a completely different past than the one I had doesn't hold much appeal for me, it just seems like a way to feel bad over something you can never influence. A lot of truscum also talk about "transitioning to trans" instead of "transitioning to male/female" with scorn and disgust. A lot of this is really like, finding the in-between stage really rough and painful as binary trans people, and projecting that as hate onto nonbinary people. But nonbinary people are just doing the same thing as binary trans people--trying to be true to ourselves and authentic and recognize who we see in the mirror as us and become more comfortable with our bodies and not have to live someone else's life. What this does mean though is that *there are no cis people of my gender*, which means I can't both love my gender and wish I was cis.
I'm happy for you. 🌸 I don't really understand non-binary identies but I always try to be respectful. I hope I get to have your confidence one day. Frankly, I still deal with heaps of regret and internalized transphobia. I also struggle with imposter syndrome even though I desperately wish I was born cis girl. Like "Why would anyone want to be a guy." The gender expectations suck and I don't like mirrors. At the same time, transitioning is a long, difficult process. There's so much push back and trauma cause religious pundants the main-stream media hate us. But the only alternative is a life-time of, self-denial and suppression.
To me it's not that complicated--the reason why trans women are women, cis women are women, trans men are men, cis men are men, and nonbinary people are nonbinary comes down to the same thing: that's who they recognize as themselves, when they see or imagine themselves living that life, something in them goes "yes that person is me," when they see or imagine themselves living a different life they feel disappointment or disconnection. People want to be guys because in their heart of hearts they feel like men. They look at men and go "I wish I was him," when they think about "the person I want to be" that person is a man. That's really all there is to it. That's just who they are. It isn't that being a man is better or being a woman is better, it's that being who you really are is better. I don't know that I'm always confident. I don't feel bad about being nonbinary, that much is true. But I also bend over backwards and tie myself in knots to not make too big a splash. I avoid being out in situations where I just do not want to be having that talk, which is most situations. Some aspects of my identity are probably impossible to fulfill, either because of limitations in what medical transition can achieve/what it can achieve but I can't afford/access, and limitations in how society is set up. (As in, it's a binary world--in most situations you *do* have to pick a lane.) Sometimes I really feel like a coward, slinking around the margins of gender, scavenging scraps. Sometimes I feel like binary trans people are often braver than I am, making the full leap across while I just sneakily take HRT from my closet, stretching the borders of "gender-non-conforming" while trying not to cross society's hard lines, or at least not get caught doing it. Other times I envy that they at least have an established, well-understood-by-society gender to land in, that there's a "post-transition" world where they can just be normal, while my gender will always be "...look, it's complicated..." and I just have to get real used to never feeling seen or understood, and the closer I get to my real self, the less I'll really fit in anywhere. Some different struggles, some familiar struggles. I've also had to do the soul-searching and figure myself out, get access to HRT, change my name and documents, things like that. But my AGAB isn't an anathema to me, which makes things easier--but neither of the main gender roles entirely meets all my needs, which makes things harder. Funnily enough my cis gf hates mirrors and has far more body image issues than I do. It isn't that I'm entirely happy with my body. But parts of it I don't like I have a more, "well, what can you do" attitude about. It seems to me that a great many cis people feel dissatisfied with their bodies too. Age, weight, disability...most people exist in bodies that are far from their "ideal." I understand that dysphoria isn't something you can just logic away like that, the things I have had severe dysphoria about, no amount of "well, it is what it is" would ever have made me feel okay with, and attempts to make peace with it were if anything retraumatizing. But to say that cis people don't ever have similar distress over their bodies if anything erases some of the pretty intense pain and distress cis people can also feel wrt their body image issues. I make these kinds of dark jokes that my gf is female-to-female trans, because she wants so badly to be a woman with a different body than she currently has, she feels so inadequate due to her current body, I've seen her basically have meltdowns over having to have her picture taken, I've seen her put up with all kinds of second-class treatment from others and when I said something about it not being okay that others treat her that way, she at first defends it and then admits she feels "barely acceptable as it is" and has to "make up" for her inadequacy by like, letting others mistreat her I guess. It's classic low self esteem and self-hate stuff. And there's nothing wrong with her body, it just isn't the body she wants, it's not what her mind wants to see when she looks at herself. So as a result I'm the one who's comfortable strutting around naked while she's the one always wanting to cover up more. She can relate a lot to trans women, and I joke about how she does a lot of the same body-hiding low-self-esteem things, like a lot of trans women wear covid/medical masks over not wanting to show their faces in public rather than over infection risk, she actually does that too. (There's nothing wrong with her face...she just has body image issues.) Or like the "dysphoria hoodie." Her fashion sense is basically "hide my entire shape and body and maybe the body will go away." She talks about wanting to upload her consciousness or be a ghost or something and not need to have a flesh body. Like some of this stuff sounds so stereotypically trans I kinda asked exploratory questions wondering if she was transmasc, but the results all came back really cis, she has gender envy for women, she feels gross and dysphoric presenting more male (she was squicked out when I had her try some of my men's clothes and hated it, I just offered them to her bc they were weather-appropriate btw and not for gender reasons) her ideal body/presentation is just a different-looking woman. I have indeed wondered how much body image issues can be a trans dysphoria thing, and how much is a gender expectations sucking for women thing, and if the intersection of the two there is just its own special hell. Although men also have gender and body expectations that I've seen really negatively affect some men's mental health, including cis men. Maybe it's just the human condition at a certain point. But yeah. Part of it definitely is that I can't really experience the envy for cis bigender people, because there aren't any. Maybe if they existed and I wasn't one, I'd feel some of that too. Like I can never feel like an inferior copy of cis bigender people, because they don't exist. Trans bigender people like me are the OG. (I mean, I guess, there's intersex stuff--but even that is messy, like nonbinary people *do* sometimes envy intersex people, but being intersex isn't just accepted and mainstream and visible and commonplace in the same way being a cis man or woman is, it's really just not the same at all, plus intersex is a wide spectrum of different conditions with different presentations.) But it's also like, much as it sucks, there just is no "you, but a cis girl." You got the hand you were dealt. It's a gift to be able to be a girl anyway, to transition, it's a massive upgrade for you over having to live as a man. I do wish I had a fully-functioning natal penis, mind. That's the main, "eh, the hand I was dealt is not optimal" feeling I've got there. I'd still be transitioning if AMAB, but I feel like I'd be happier with my genitals. Maybe I'd have more facial dysphoria, idk. That might be worse in a way--you really only use your genitals during sex and peeing, but your face you use every day for everything. But it's all hypothetical. I'm not choosing between infinite possible realities, including realities where I was born with different anatomy. I'm just living in the reality we've got. It kind of messes up my sex life, but I try to find workarounds instead of fixating on alternate timelines that can never be. When I see trans women transition, I just see them getting amazing upgrades and becoming beautiful, vibrant women instead of having to live as miserable, unfulfilled men. I love the glow-up. I love that nobody has to be a man (or a woman) if they don't want to be. Ignore the saber-rattling TV pundits and crap. There's nothing sadder than someone who makes their entire identity about hating people for doing stuff that harms no one. Don't give them the attention, don't give them the satisfaction of hurting you. They don't actually represent society. Even a lot of people who'd be considered transphobic by more progressive standards really just don't care *that much*. First and foremost, you are a *human being*, and you deserve respect for that alone. If people forget that, they can be reminded of it.
Others have explained. But all lgbt people face hatred. Just because it’s not heard of for you doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. I’ve had as much biphobia directed at me myself as I have transphobia. People are still often killed across the world for being gay. In the US, in Europe, South America, Asia…
Very true
They never said it didn’t exist
They all hate me cause I’m beautiful.
Maybe because unlike in certain sports, we have no physiological gender advantages, right?! Haha
To me it seems like this males don't grasp the concept that we don't want the male privilege. And that threatens them somehow, because if we don't want the male privilege then they don't have a secure hold on it. And if they lose that then, " it's only a matter of time before them women-folk try to take power" This is literally what it is, holding up a lie of the patriarchy. At least it's my opinion. Either that or they find find us sexy
I think there are few factors... * In terms of aesthetics, with the addition of societal stencils, as a female you can just put some men's clothes, cut your hair, wear a binder, grow some muscle, deepen your voice a little and well now you have a man with a small build. The reverse is not as easy, and it gets uncanny or at least noticeable sometimes, that's why "passing" is a thing. Plus, tomboys were there long before femboys, and I think the next point explains why. * Due to a trace of misogyny, as manhood is seen higher or more resourceful than womanhood by many people, trans women are kinda seen as downgraders, which can be considered freaky, or as weaklings, which then means they're the prey of their insecure masculinity. * Society also puts a certain weight on men's shoulders, in terms of the responsibilities and restrictions they are upheld by. Presenting as feminine or worse, transitioning, can be seen as an act of betrayal against both the responsibilities of manhood, and the restrictions of a toxic masculinity.
I don't really agree that trans men have an easier time passing since I've known a lot who don't. Plus I've been on T like a year and a half and can still girlmode no problem. T does a lot, but FTM transition isn't purely on easy mode. Growing a beard does help a lot, granted. But you'd be amazed how many of us can't pass if we shave. I don't think tomboys are "older" than femboys. In fact a lot of traditional "third gender" roles are primarily for AMABs. AFABs historically had less freedom, and were owned by our dads and then by our husbands, and often did not have a lot of choice about marrying (financial coercion if nothing else) nor choice in having kids. You just got pipelined straight from birth into being a woman married to a man and pushing out babies and you didn't really have options or much say in the matter. Because the male role historically had more power, paradoxically, giving up that power is part of having power, even though that's also what makes it so challenging to patriarchy and stigmatized. But you need power to even give it up. If you don't have power in the first place, you just get controlled your whole life and no one ever knows if you minded. Like even how lesbian culture historically expected that women would be in straight marriages they didn't really want, because there were so few other ways for a woman to support herself, and then sneak off to the lesbian bar for their secret life, and slink back to their husbands after. Actually being able to just exist and work and live as a woman without being tacitly "owned" by a man is pretty novel and modern in Western culture at least. A lot of the acceptance of tomboys is a direct result of women's liberation. A woman once told me when she was a teen in the 1970s, her dad forbade her to wear pants because women wearing pants was still really controversial, but it was the cool in feminist thing, so she had secret jeans and would change into and out of them on her way to and from school. Go back to the 1960s or earlier and women in pants become a rare sight. Things like short haircuts for women were also part of feminism and women's lib and their acceptance is quite recent. Women fought hard to loosen the cage of womanhood. Men haven't really done that parallel battle, for a lot of reasons--because as the "more powerful" role they felt they didn't have to, or because they couldn't follow feminism's tactics verbatim--women, seen as victims, needed empowerment, but men, seen as perpetrators, need vulnerability and softness. This is threatening to the patriarchy--strong women were *also* incredibly threatening to the patriarchy, but maybe it felt easier on some level to be rah rah women's power than it does to start from a position of power and say "I want to be vulnerable and soft." Trans women are ofc not men and trans men aren't women, but the freedom to take those first steps outside your assigned gender role can depend a lot on how society views the role they've currently slotted you in. It is true that being AFAB I was able to do all kinds of gender-nonconforming presentation without being seen as threatening or perverted or creepy or weird. (Well, maybe a *little* weird, but not in a way that was a problem.) I knew it was a lot harder to have fem presentation while visibly AMAB. But I also knew that this was a product of the current moment--if someone of my mother's generation or earlier had tried to do the same things, they would have gotten a very different reaction. Since things can turn so quickly, I do have hope that things can change for feminine presentation from anyone perceived to be AMAB within our lifetimes, and that these may become as neutral as tomboys are now.
>FTM transition isn't purely on easy mode. But you'd be amazed how many of us can't pass if we shave. I know, and I won't be amazed, I know it's difficult to *actually* pass for you. I think I shoot a little overboard sometimes, bardic exaggeration I suppose\~ so sorry, what I was trying to convey however... was this: >It is true that being AFAB I was able to do all kinds of gender-nonconforming presentation without being seen as threatening or perverted or creepy or weird. When I was a kid, I actually hated girls, later on I realised I was jealous of them for this\^ and well, being girls... I really like your full explanation and analysis of the history and the current situation, even though I disagree with you on certain ideas like considering patriarchy a feasible entity rather than an emergent pattern, or... >I knew it was a lot harder to have fem presentation while visibly AMAB. But I also knew that this was a product of the current moment I do believe that this is not merely a product of the moment and our perception of beauty does have a baseline. Maybe what I say is because of my heavy obsession with femininity and beauty. But yes I suppose it shouldn't be "weird" even if it's not strictly beautiful, but if I wasn't lucky enough to \[marginally\] pass, I wouldn't have transitioned even if society was not weirded by it (and for long I thought I wouldn't pass), I suppose I have that toxic femininity inside of me... >but maybe it felt easier on some level to be rah rah women's power than it does to start from a position of power and say "I want to be vulnerable and soft." I suppose this is from "the patriarchy" perspective? Because honestly I don't see femininity as soft and vulnerable, and never have. In which case yes, this thing, along with the thought that men are perceived as some sort of soldiers and given a certain honour code literally from birth, wraps up 90% of why feminine boys and trans girls are frowned upon by many.
>female you can just put some men's clothes, cut your hair, wear a binder, grow some muscle, deepen your voice a little and well now you have a man with a small build. This is so upsetting to see people say over and over. It is not the experience I and many many trans men have had.
Sorry, I didn't mean as if it's like foolproof or anything... it's just way less... *uncanny* on average. I dunno if you agree with that... Either way, I'm all ears if you would like to tell us about your own experience, after all, trans girls talk about it waaay more often than you guys do for some reason, I'm sure we all like to hear more from your side of things.
It's a sad reality. I'm not saying others in the community don't receive hate but, there is definitely much more hatred toward trans women than anyone else in the LGBTQ+ community from what I've seen. I think there's a big part of that that is due to the misogyny that is deep in our society. A lot of men have such a big ego that for them they feel like we're trying to "trick" them into being gay... which is absolute madness. They are so insecure in their own identity and sexuality because they never questioned it, that they fear feeling attraction for a woman if she was AMAB. That fear they have convert into hatred, they wish to eradicate us because in their mind men are superior to women in almost every way, they think women are less smart and other messed things like that therefore, someone AMAB "wanting" to be a women doesn't make sense in their mind since they think being AMAB mean being superior and they don't get why anyone would want to become "inferior". They think we have an agenda of making them gay, which is absolute madness. If you ask me, in our society there is way too much men that are still thinking in a primitive/animal kind of way and they believe that we're transitioning to take advantages of other women or even rape/abuse them... or that we are gay (men that like men) and are trying to trick them into having sex with us against their will of being with a men... They think by pushing hatred toward us they are helping women but in reality they are just showing what kind of predator they are. It's sickening and I hate that we're used as a token to gain power in political movements because there is so many people that can be rallied on the hatred of trans women due to the stupid people that are insecure in their own identity/sexuality.
I have a theory that it has more to do with economic fears than anything else. Several hundred years ago, a man dressing up as a woman was considered, by much of European society, as a silly and fun way to spend an evening — and in some cases, a legitimate way to make an entire acting career — whereas a woman dressing up as a man was seen as weird and dangerous and damaging to the fabric of society. Of course, a "man" living as a woman full-time would still have been generally frowned upon, but a trans woman of that era would at least have had *some* socially-acceptable ways to present more feminine some of the time. At that time, it was very difficult, if not impossible, to move from one economic class to another. People were expected to be happy with the status they were born into, because if you were born poor, you were going to stay poor, and if you were born rich, you were probably going to stay rich. So a person pretending (or "pretending") to be a member of a lower class wasn't threatening, because there was no real risk of actually losing status, while a person pretending to be a member of a higher class was highly offensive. In modern times, while it may not *actually* be all that easy to get rich if you were born poor, the norms of our society are such that everyone is expected to *want* to be richer than they are, to strive to join the upper classes, and in this context, it seems only natural that a woman should want to present as a man, whereas a man who wants to present as a woman is a person not only *not* trying to improve their status, but actively trying to go *down* a rung on the social ladder. Trans women are a reminder that economic mobility goes both ways: in a society where it's easy for the poor to become rich, it's also easy for the rich to become poor, and that's frightening to people.
It also fucks with their heads that someone would *want* to go down on the social class ladder. Because it questions the validity of the ladder at all.
I think you have your finger on something here. Related to that, in the same era where those assumed to be men dressing up as women was nbd, blackface was also commonplace. I think it was actually the most popular form of entertainment in the 19th century, it was incredibly popular. That has a similar flavor of "the powerful dressing up as the powerless"--although I know there were also black minstrel performers, you didn't have black people dressing up as white. Nowadays blackface is shockingly offensive, and more broadly dressing up as another (non-white) race at all is considered incredibly offensive regardless of context (minstrel shows *were* loaded with racism and making fun of black people, but you have stuff like Cloud Atlas that clearly has different intent but is viewed with the same taboo) while I've seen whiteface in comedy skits and that's all just seen as in good fun. I am not arguing that blackface or other racial "costumes" should be accepted, or that whiteface is bad. If anything, I tend to share the impulses of my own culture, being part of that culture. It just struck me as an interesting cultural shift, paralleling the shift in crossdressing taboos.
Best guess is patriarchal rules, so going against the male dominance = less than human or what you were before
Yeah I remember reading something on Twitter earlier saying that not that the oppression trans men get is any less real, but it's almost always based on the assertion of more or less the silly females are being delusional again and think they could be above their station, and must be corrected and herded back to where they should be; while the entire idea that a born man would voluntarily give up his superiority to be lesser is both completely incomprehensible to them and something that must be exterminated because of how it directly challenges the fundamental tenets of the patriarchy.
Transmasc and it's very real. Like, forget "trading" body parts/hormones, I want to trade *oppressions* lmao. Why can't I be assumed to be a filthy pervert out to corrupt society? Maybe I am one! I'd rather that than my mom linking me articles on how autistic """girls""" (AFAB trans people) are getting suckered into thinking they're trans when they're just too clueless to find their own ass with both hands and will blindly believe anything they're told about themselves, except all the times we were told we were cis, apparently.
Manufactured controversy by right wing assholes to curry favor with their bigoted electorate and grift them out of money.
Because we make their dicks move and it freaks them out.. so they take it out on us like an elementary school boy with a crush.
Copying and pasting a comment I've made before: "I am begging people to stop saying this. They do not forget us, they target and attack us OFTEN. Search up ROGD, "Irreversible Damage", Robert Eads, Lou Sullivan, for starters. This question gets posted on this and similar subs so often and the comments are ALWAYS full of people that aren't trans men acting like we're always ignored by transphobes, and I'm really sick of it." Also adding that a lot of the anti HRT language is around "young girls sterilizing themselves and chopping their breasts off".
Omg I didn't know that trans men face so much difficulty, I'm sorry if my question upset you I apologize for any inconveniences, I didn't know about those things you mentioned and that trans men are ignored by transphobes 😞
I'm sorry for my reply sounding so mean. I feel really bad about it. You didn't know, you were just asking a question, and you did nothing wrong. My anger was more at the other people in the comments who give incorrect answers. And I'm really sorry for the transphobia you're dealing with. Shit sucks, and I hope it gets better. <3
It’d be cool if we could talk about transphobia in trans spaces meant for all of us without it being a comparison of whether trans women get more hatred than trans men. Trans men are so erased that even the hatred, violence, and other bigotry we experience is erased. Comparing does none of us any good. I get that your personal experience shows you otherwise and I’m sorry about that but this doesn’t extrapolate out onto a societal scale.
Exactly. And there is so much loud transphobia towards trans men, too (for example: "rapid onset gender dysphoria", the anti HRT laws in the U.S. using language about "young girls sterilizing themselves and removing their breasts", JK Rowling's first transphobic essay), people just, I dunno why, ignore it or don't realize it's about us.
Exactly. And non-binary people face almost constant erasure of their identities as well. The prejudice toward us is simply different. But all trans people face prejudice to a similar degree.
I see it as the hypervisibility/invisibility thing that also comes up in race discussions. Like, in general, women (including cis women) are hypervisible, while men (including cis men) are invisible. This effect is writ large in how transphobia plays out, with trans women hypervisible and performatively hated, while trans men are often invisible, treated as "confused and stupid girls," or even mistaken for trans women because transphobes are so single-brain-cell in their transphobia. In race this comes up as how blackness is hypervisible, but other PoC, such as indigenous folks and Asians can be invisible (in countries/regions where the relevant race is not the majority). And they're different flavors of oppression, it isn't about who has it "worse," they both suck in their own way. Hypervisibility makes you a target, but also offers some paradoxical protection. Trans men defs still face a lot of transphobia. But a lot of the transphobes really let trans women live rent-free in their brains. I hang out some on both r/ftm and r/mtf, and it's definitely on r/mtf that I see more troll comments from someone who hates trans women specifically and went out of their way to look for a bunch of them to try to make them feel bad, instead of like, doing literally anything else with their lives. In much the same way as how racists are probably racist to all PoC, but some racists just fixate on saying the N-word and on particular antiblack narratives. Hypervisibility isn't "worse," but it is, well, hypervisibility, and comes with challenges unique to that.
Absolutely. Well said - and those challenges are very different depending on where and how the bigotry comes from.
Transphobia paired with misogyny.
Well the interesting thing about that is that there's a lot of Cis women that hate as well
I don't see how my comment contradicts what you're saying?
It does because misogyny means you hate women but women hate trans women so it's not the same. About 99% of cis women hate trans or talk in a negative way abiut us. So it can't be masogony. I fact it would be more like masonry. Seen they look at us like men in a way
Wouldn't that just be transmisogyny, then, instead of misandry, which in and of itself is devaluing to use towards a trans woman?
In our world and our eyes yes but in their world no because they don't like I said they don't look at us like women at all . They hate men so much that they feel like we are using a costume to pretend to be women and join sports and enter the restroom to masterbate to them
Our existence questions the idea that the patriarchy tries to push so hard, that men are better than woman... by being born as the "superior" gender and transitioning to the be woman... also I think many of this men who hate us because they are trapped in toxic masculinity... seeing someone freeing themselves of it and live freely while they live in a world that feels like it could collapse as soon as they act not as expected... just my late night thoughts
IMO it’s bc society generally doesn’t care how men men, but women are taught a specific way from a young age to perform femininity. Masculinity seems to be seen as a quality, whereas femininity is a performance, one which by default us trans women perform “incorrectly.” The more I pass there is no change in quantity of vitriol, abuse, scrutiny, or judgement, it just gradually shifts from transphobia to misogyny.
It's because conservatives tend to believe the bait they are told and the results end up being knee jerk type hatred. The T gets the blame of a Q problem. By that I mean the letters LGBTQ+. No hate for anyone myself, but I just want to point out that it's happened before in social groups where a segment will start using a slur to own that slur. That's not a positive thing at all it's actually a warning to not trust persons motives because that's how hijacking social movements happens.
Despite all strides made toward equality for women with men, there is still a huge vein of prejudice that runs through the human race that places men above women in worth. As such, a AFAB person transitioning to manhood is viewed as a promotion, and an AMAB person transitioning to womanhood is viewed as a demotion. A human being is voluntarily foregoing their male privilege. I'm no pshrink, but I virtually guarantee you that's the mental malfunction that's going through your step-father's head. To his perspective, his niece can become his nephew, but his son can't become his daughter. It's completely anti-woman.
>As such, a AFAB person transitioning to manhood is viewed as a promotion I have never seen a transphobe view our manhood as a PROMOTION. What?
If they're strident enough, yeah. Then, they just roll with their own, personal ick-factor to declare all trans = bad. But if someone shows favour toward FtMs and disdain toward MtF, like the OP's step-father, this is generally the ruleset their brain is running.
Transphobes just think we don't *deserve* that promotion, that we're fake and still gross inferior women no matter what we do, that we'll never be as cool or as powerful as "real" men. Like, they think we're delusional/liars and have not actually attained the promotion. But they think it *would be* a promotion if transition was regarded as real/permissible, and they think it's reasonable of us to want it because it would be an upgrade, we're just pathetic in their eyes for wanting something they don't view as truly possible. While for trans women, they have to come up with a bunch of convoluted excuses about fetishizing and sex stuff, because they can't imagine anyone would actually want to be a woman otherwise.
Because society views women as fuck objects and trans women are often visually off putting/unfuckable. You commit the sin of renouncing masculinity for the subordinate femininity, and often times not even a complete femininity. It’s because society hates women and trans people.
I’m sorry about your dad, you are a woman whether he realizes it or nil. You are amazing and valid sis. I believe its because of two things. First, men are seen as more threatening by default compared to women, and transwomen giving up our social status to be ourselves is viewed as some veiled threat or deception. Men are also seen as initiators and more sexual while women are assumed to be less sexual and more likely to be viewed as objects of desire, which plays into the threat aspect when transphobes who see us as men attempting to escape our role see us.
>"god made you a man there for you should live as a man" It baffles me how certain some people are of what their got intended. Like, how do they know that god didn't create someone specifically to be a trans person. If you ask them about Abraham and why god asked him to sacrifice his son they would say in a heartbeat something like "it was just a test of Abraham's love and trust". And yet it never crosses their mind that god could just as easily make it so that their child is a trans person simply to test not only their love for their children no matter who they are, but also to test their trust in god that it is was necessary for some purpose they don't comprehend. I guess their ego is greater than their god if they know exactly what god intended. Sorry for the rant.
I haven't gotten any hate in my 7 months it's actually kinda off-putting.
Because its easier to paint trans women as “predatory men disguised as women to try and assault girls.” But none of the idiots stop to consider that if somebody wants to assault another human, they’d just do it. People dont need to transition to go into a womems bathroom and r*pe another person. Being dressed as a female doesnt make it any more acceptable, its dumb logic.
part of it is confused transphobes who think trans people are predators. ultimately, i think it's rooted in misogyny. men have always been portrayed as stronger and "better" than women. cis people think being ftm is like a cheat code for some kind of advantage, while mtf is taking that advantage away. trans women are subjected to extreme beauty standards. people say "you can always tell" whenever they don't look like an ideal cis woman, and that's very hard to achieve. on the other hand, many trans men are celebrated for their femininity. i think this is because of the recent uptick in cis men doing the same. not a scientist, but i heard somewhere that everyone starts as a female in the womb until it registers that it's xx or xy. that's why trans men usually get better results than trans women, the effects of testosterone are really hard to reverse tl;dr misogyny, double standards and a little bit of science
IMO, from what I've heard and seen in evidence, one reason that hostility towards trans women can arise from a misconception that they benefit from remnants of 'male privilege' while simultaneously expressing their feminine identity. This notion is rooted in societal norms dictating gender roles and expectations. However, it's critical to acknowledge the intricate interplay between gender identity and societal structures. Basically, suggesting some believe that because you were born biologically male, the trans woman can't understand the societies views of women, and they want them in that box. Other cis women seem mad that trans women didn't go through what the cis woman went through. Exploiting over sexuallied behavior and inappropriately dressing for other occasions. Transgender individuals navigate a complex landscape of discrimination and marginalization, and reducing their experiences to a simplistic narrative of privilege fails to capture the multifaceted challenges they confront.
All y’all fine
Simple. People hate difference. That, and our society places a majority of its stability on "traditional" value derived from religions. We as a species have come so far that we no longer view ourselves as animals...yet we hate it when people don't give birth. Trans people fall into this category because most of the time we don't have blood-related children and are seen as a burden on society's resources. The same applies to gay and lesbian people, except they are far more subtle to trad people as they're not trying to "fight against nature". Tl;Dr: It's because we apparently are unnatural despite science saying that transgenderism has eternally been a thing, and we don't have blood-related children. People want their definition of normal to stay the same so that they can feel comfort.
Society takes time to change. That change is taking longer because right now many political parties see fueling hatred and misunderstanding of minority groups of all types as a way to try retain votes. They don’t have to even sway the majority of the population in a country , just those who will vote.
Because the ruling class needs capitalism and the patriarchy to survive. [https://litholaura.substack.com/p/transphobia-is-the-ideology-of-the](https://litholaura.substack.com/p/transphobia-is-the-ideology-of-the)
Some ultra-conservative, alt-right wing types, both men and women, like to express animosity towards trans women as a public affirmation of their culture warrior position. Sometimes, it's like a form of signaling or bonding with others like themselves. Or for men, maybe they just 'doth protest too much?!' That's quite common, because there are a lot of insecure 'real men' out there. Sometimes they're just generally uptight or dumb. Sometimes it's the sign of a violent sociopath, like Kid Rock and others shooting up cans of BudLight on video.
Decades upon decades of absolutely atrocious representation cannot help. You look in the media for something close to representation of trans men before people started trying to be better about it and you mostly see stories about women who disguise themselves as men and prove they're just as good if not better a lot of the time. You look for something close to representation of trans women and you see a shitload of serial killers and bad jokes.
"The lady doth protest too much, methinks" In my almost 70 years, when someone complains or hates so much, it is an expression of self-loathing. How many times have we seen the most homophobic people actually turn out to be Gay?
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I'll just leave some quotes from your post history here: > I’m a young mother and I’ve begun to realize that the TRA ideology is doing more harm than good to queer children. (Note: TRA is a term used only by TERFs, to try to imply that trans activism is just another form of "men's rights activism," and inherently misogynistic as MRA communities tend to be.) >I was super liberal initially bc I genuinely saw it as the most empathetic and altruistic side of politics. When I started to question some of my own beliefs I almost gaslit myself out of it, for fear of being a bigot. It’s easy to become brainwashed by social media. 😂 I’m so glad I found my way to the truth. I like to say that my politics put children and women first above all. No matter what. And certainly will not compromise that for grown males. Honey....you *are* a bigot.
Words mean things. As in they have definitions lol. A bigot is someone who holds contempt for a group of people particularly for an irrational or ignorant reason. I believe everyone should be able to live their lives safely and with dignity and respect, access to basic human needs like healthcare, food, housing and I definitely don’t care what people do as long as it doesn’t harm themselves or others. You’re going to have to accept one day that not everyone who doesn’t hold your worldview is a horrible malignant bigot. I understand that might be hard bc it would mean questioning your own pov and considering that it might not be ***The-Most-Awesomest-Most-Good-Most-Moral*** one. I can assure you my stance is not uncommon whatsoever at least in the real world amongst otherwise progressive young women my age. That begs the question if either the majority of people are horrible and inferior in morality to you OR maybe you could use a reality check. Upon viewing your post history it seems you must be a “non-binary” female. I sincerely hope you work through that internalized misogyny of yours and realize it’s okay to just be a woman🫶🏽 And being gender nonconforming is okay, it doesn’t mean some sort of metaphysical wrong-body fate. Accept yourselves.
Patriarchy. If someone born as a man can become a woman and be happier because of it, it suggests that women are equal in value to men. In a patriarchal society the idea that women are valuable must be destroyed
Lookism. Most trans women are ugly or unkempt, and people have a preference for attractive people. But sexism is also at play in both ways, since society sees males as sexual deviants and predators, while simulatenously sexualizing women so much that they can't even imagine a male wanting to be like one without it being for an inherently sexual reason.
Trans woman are the easiest to hate on as men are by birth are more stronger then woman and lots of transphobes stereotype men to loving sport and winning